mean girls wednesday

“Storvacker. How do I even begin to explain Storvacker?

Storvacker is flawless.

She has two ancient Elven trees for claw sharpening AND a silver honey dish.

I hear that her claws are valued at 10,000 sovereigns.

I hear that she sells her shed fur to Orlesian master weavers in Val Royeaux.

Her favourite story is Hard in Hightown.

One time, she met Alistair Therein, fabled warrior of the Fifth Blight, and he told her she was pretty.

One time, she clawed me in the face. It was amazing.”

From ‘Ruminations upon the Avvar and their Customs’, by Reginald De George

The signs as Mean Girls quotes

Aries: “This is Damien. He’s almost too gay to function.”

Taurus: “That’s why her hair is so big. It’s full of secrets.”

Gemini: “Four for you, Glen Coco! You go, Glen Coco!”

Cancer: “God, Karen, you’re so stupid!”

Leo: “Oh my god Karen, you can’t just ask people why they’re white!”

Virgo: “There’s at least a… *fondles boob* …30% chance that it’s already raining.”

Libra: “On October 3rd, he asked me what day it was. ‘It’s October 3rd.’”

Scorpio: “On Wednesdays we wear pink.”

Sagittarius: “Get in, loser, we’re going shopping.”

Capricorn: “Don’t have sex. You will get pregnant and die.”

Aquarius: “Gretchen, stop trying to make Fetch happen!”

Pisces: “She doesn’t even go here!”

  • On Wednesdays we wear pink: Aries, Gemini, Virgo, Libra, Sagittarius, Capricorn
  • On Wednesdays we wear black: Taurus, Leo, Cancer, Scorpio, Aquarius, Pisces