i͡m̶ ̕d̵i̢sg̷uste͝d̛.͘
( antisepticeye )
i͡m̶ ̕d̵i̢sg̷uste͝d̛.͘

@hatsunepudimmiojin: Anti? You get scared about Dark? Are him more strong than you? (Don’t hurt me pls, I’m asking cuz looks like he treat you like you are his pet/slave)

*growls* a ̨pe̡t̕??͜ ͏A͟ SLA͟V͡E̛??͜? ̶im̷ ̀am ńo̵n̡e of t̷ho͜s̡e̸ ̷t̷hi̸ng͝s! ͏i̵ ̀a̕m ́m̶y̴ ow͘n͢ ͡i̕n͟dep̵e҉n͢d͞e̕n͘t͞ cr͢ea͏tu̕re̸.͡ ͟i d͏o as͟ i̵ p̨leas͢e,͜ ҉and t̵ha̢t͏ ̡t̛all f͢uck҉i̴ng m̡on̵och͏ro͘m͟e̢ l̕umb͡erja̕c͠k̡ ͝h̛a͟s͠ n̕o͠ i͠np̢ųt on̴ ̵my ̡a̸c͝t̷ìons!͟ ̛d̀ont ev͏e͜r̕ ͞..͠ ̧f͏all fo͟ŗ s̴uc͢h fąlse ͝accús̀a͏ti͞ons.͝

eb-n-flo  asked:

Every time I see you post the flower asks I'm on it. Sweet pea + Jack (nonsexual delicate pleasures pls?)

Sweet Pea - Delicate Pleasures

The first time Jack had chocolate, she was pretty sure she’d just bitten into heaven itself. She’d never had anything like it, never felt anything quite like it, and it was really no wonder that she’d stuffed her face full with those chocolate chip cookies. They were delicious, and she couldn’t remember the last time–if ever–she’d eaten anything that tasted so good.

That wasn’t the only thing that she found tasted good, after her escape from Cerberus, but she did keep coming back to it. Not as often, because she saw having a sweet tooth as a weakness to be exploited, but…there was no harm in picking up a box of cookies every now and then and pigging out. 

Until someone else figured out her secret.

She’s not sure how Shepard managed to figure it out, nor does she really want to know (though, in all honesty, it was probably Kasumi or the freaky AI that ran the ship). She’s just curious as to why Shepard brought her a chocolate cake with candles on it.

“I don’t have a birthday,” she says after a minute of silence, crossing her arms and eyeing the cake warily.

“Not officially, no,” Shepard agrees, moving to set the cake down on the table nearby, “but it’s been a month since we blew up that facility on Pragia.”


Shepard laughs. “So, I figured that you could use that to celebrate your birthday. I don’t know if we’ll have time to wait for the 1 year anniversary to roll around, so–I thought we’d celebrate now.”

Jack blinks a few times. “Really?”

“That,” Shepard says, licking some chocolate frosting off her finger delicately, “and I was in the mood for cake. You like chocolate, right?”

There’s something in the way she asks that that makes Jack narrow her eyes, suspicious and looking for an ulterior motive, but the cake does smell really good and, well

“Heh. Who doesn’t?”

Shepard smiles, and Jack finds herself smiling back.

“That’s the spirit. Happy Birthday, Jack.”


Shepard’s laughter echoes around the room as Jack shoves a rather large bite of cake into her mouth. Maybe Shepard isn’t so bad after all.

I’m ace af so it’s always gonna be ‘nonsexual’ for the most part around here my friend.


I Get By With a Little Help From My Friends - Joeck Imagine

*direct any requests to my ask box :)*


“It’s called a long clamp or something,” Joe frowned, trying to explain the new weird challenge he’d came up with for this week’s video. I watched him as he spoke, smiling slightly to myself. It was at times like this, when he wasn’t paying attention to me, that I could really appreciate him. The way the bright rays from the lights hit him in just the right places, highlighting cheekbones and a sharp jawline.

I was completely lost in my own world, happy to be just watching Joe when I heard a small chuckle from beside me. I looked over at Conor to see him smirking at me with a knowing look in his eyes. He winked at me before turning back to Joe, saying something about dark twisted fantasies to which Joe replied that he’d been watching a lot of Saw recently, making both Conor and myself laugh.

Now my secret was out though.

Although, I can’t really be sure if it ever was a secret because it’s not like I was really trying to hide my feelings, it’s just that I had no idea of how to act upon them. Maybe it’s for the best that Conor found out, at least now he might be able to help me.

Actually, on second thought, Conor’s probably the worst person for advice on this. It’d probably be a lot better if Josh or Caspar found out. Knowing Josh, he might’ve already figured it out anyway, long before the rest of the boys.

God damnit.

* * *

“So, Joe, huh?” Conor spoke with his hands on his hips, posture somewhat resembling our mum.

We’d just finished the video and Joe had started transferring the footage onto his laptop to start editing when Conor pulled me into the bathroom, telling me he had to talk to me about something urgent.

“Um, yeah, I guess.” I replied sheepishly, rubbing the back of my neck and looking down at the ground in an effort to hide the blush that was spreading across my cheeks.

“Well then, what’s the plan?” My brother asked, confusing me.

“Plan?” I frowned.

“To get the two of you together? You must’ve come up with something.” Conor said, as if it was obvious.

“I was just kind of living with the fact that it wouldnt happen.” I shrugged, mumbling slightly in embarrassment.

“Jesus Jack,” Conor sighed, “We can’t do this now but later on tonight at home, we are damn well coming up with a plan of attack.”

* * *

“I knew it.” Josh smirked, just like Conor had earlier once he’d figured me out.

“How did you know?” I asked, wanting to know what had given it all away.

“Probably the fact that you look at him like he hung the moon in the sky, and the fact that you do not stop touching him. Also, when we’re in a group together you guys just gravitate towards each other. Honestly, everything you do just gives it away.” Josh shrugged, listing all the clues that had helped him piece it together.

“How you knew doesn’t matter, what matters is it is our mission to get them together.” Conor spoke up, preventing that conversation from going anyway else and refocusing us on the task at hand.

“Well, how are we going to do that?” Josh crossed him arms and leaned back on the sofa.

“Christ Josh, you make it sound like I have no good traits at all.” I complained.

“Joe has seen your player tendencies in action so this might be a harder job than it seems Jack, a pretty face will only get you so far here.” Conor reminded me.

“I forgot all about that, oh my God.” I groaned, burying my head in my hands.

“No, that’s fine, we just have to prove to him that you’re serious about this.” Josh said, sitting forward again and resting his elbows on his knees.

“So this mission has two parts, part one being find out if Joe returns these feelings, and part two being show him how much you want this.” Conor took up the same position as Josh, getting ready for an in depth discussion of how I could pull this off.

“Sure, that can’t be too hard right?” I smiled nervously.

“Let’s hope not.” Josh smiled back at me, trying to reassure me.

* * *

I stood around the corner of the kitchen, trying to get close enough so I could hear Jack and Conor but making sure I couldn’t be seen. At least not by Joe.

“So, when are you gonna tell Jack?” Conor asked.

I almost audibly groaned, of course Conor would be blunt about it and make me look like an idiot. The annoying thing being I couldn’t just walk out and defend myself because then Joe would know I was eavesdropping.

“Tell him what?” Joe sounded confused, but his voice sounded almost nervous. That could just be me getting my hopes up though.

“That you’re in love with him.” Conor continued to be the most forward person ever.

“Oh my God.” I whispered, hoping it wasn’t loud enough for Joe to pick up on.

I buried my head in my hands as Conor’s comment was followed by what just might be the longest silence of my life.

After another beat of silence all I heard was Joe splutter out a shocked, “What?!”

“It’s not exactly subtle mate.” I could almost see the knowing look that was on Conor’s face in my mind.

“Is it really that obvious?” Joe let out a sigh of defeat whilst all I wanted to let out was a scream of victory.

Obviously that wasn’t possible right now so I opted for a little air punch and a near silent, “Get in!”

“If it means anything, he feels the same way.” Conor offered.

“Really?” Joe sound surprised, as if he’d never expected me to like him back.

“Really.” Conor said, the smirk practically audible in his voice.

* * *

“Okay, so phase one was successful. What about phase 2?” I started, looking around at the group of boys sans Joe.

“Take him out for a meal.” Oli suggested.

Out of all of the boys, when it came to romance advice I’d probably trust Oli the most so I nodded and said, “Where to though?”

“Nandos is always a safe bet.” Conor spoke up, a smirk on his face.

“I’m not taking him to bloody Nandos, Con. ” I frowned at him, not in the mood to joke around.

“Wagamamas!” Josh shouted out.

“No.” I groaned.

“Could you cook for him?” Caspar asked.

“Jack would burn the whole flat down.” Mikey laughed from his position on the sofa.

“Thanks, Mikey.” I smiled sarcastically.

“What about somewhere Italian? Everyone likes Italian.” Conor offered, the first sensible suggestion he’d made so far.

“That would work actually.” I agreed.

“Which restaurant then, Bella Italia?” Josh looked around at everyone else.

“No it’s gotta be fancier than that.” Conor rubbed his face, clearly starting to get annoyed with how hard it was to come to a decision.

“What about the one that just opened down the road?” Caspar sat forward in his seat, pulling his phone out of his pocket to google the restaurant.

“Oh yeah, that one’s meant to be really nice.” Josh added.

“Okay so I’ll take him there.” I said, looking around at the boys for approval.

“Hang on Jack, you’ve still gotta ask him.” Mikey pointed out.


* * *


hey man, you free this friday? - delivered 19:08


yeah, i think so, why? - received 19:11


a new italian opened down the road from mine, wondered if you wanted to check it out? - delivered 19:12


oh yeah sure, who else is coming? - received 19:14


it’s just us, the boys are busy - delivered 19:16

is that okay? - delivered 19:17


yeah, can you book a table for 7? - received 19:20


on it, i’ll pick you up at quarter to - delivered 19:21


see you then :) - received 19:22


:) - delivered 19:22

* * *

“Mikey, if you spray any more on me I’ll suffocate before I get out the door.” Jack scolded, trying to shield himself from Mikey and the cologne bottle in his hands.

“Jack, I’m trying to help you find love.” Mikey defended himself as Oli came over and plucked the bottle from his hands.

Josh walked up behind me with a leather jacket, letting me slip my arms into it before pulling it up over my shoulders. Conor pressed my wallet and phone into my hands, letting me put them into my jean pockets.

“Alright, stand still.” Oli instructed me.

All the boys stepped back and looked at me, a final once over before I left.

“What a handsome lad.” Conor commented, causing us all to laugh.

“I think our work is done.” Josh nodded, looking over at the rest of them and recieving a similar response.

I walked over to the front door, turning around to say, “Wish me luck guys.”, before stepping out the door.

* * *

And when we came back to the apartment later hand in hand with big grins spread across our faces, none of the boys said anything, they just looked at each other with knowing grins and knowing they’d done what any good friends would’ve done.