me when i have to get up in the morning

Accusing someone of faking their mental illness is, frankly, sick. But for those of you who are gleefully claiming that I am a liar, let me make myself clear: 

I’ve been treated for anxiety and depression, on and off, since I was 14 years old. (That’s a bit over a decade, if you care). I see a therapist once a week and I have a prescription for anti-anxiety medication for when it gets so bad that I can’t breathe and I feel like the world is closing in on me. I have worked my ass off - my fucking ass off - to get to a place where, on most days, I can function, despite this sometimes mentally and physically debilitating condition. 

I’m sure some of my anxiety is genetic and most of it is the result of the fact that I grew up in an alcoholic household with a mother who screamed at me when I did so much as brush my teeth in the morning (the sound of running water didn’t mesh well with her hangover, I guess), who told me on multiple occasions that I was a fucking idiot and who once said her life would have been so much better if I hadn’t ever been a part of it. 

I’m not an idiot. It’s taken me a long time, and a lot of hard work, to be able to say that and believe it. 

If you can’t understand how my anxiety could be exacerbated by having my intelligence ridiculed and insulted and by being made to feel like anything I say or do will be ridiculed and put under a microscope by people I don’t even know, then I don’t know what to tell you. I’m sorry, I guess, that you have such a small capacity for empathy in your heart. 

Once again, I will say: that person you’re ridiculing? The one you reblogged and interacted with, only to turn around and make fun of when they said something you disagreed with? The one you accuse of being a liar without having any insight whatsoever into what their life is like? They are a human being with feelings, just like you. They aren’t less of a human because you disagree with them, or because you can’t see their face.  

This is the last thing I’m going to say about all of this for now. I’m taking a break so I can at least try to get through the next few days, which will already be hard enough as I enter the belly of the beast that is my dysfunctional family, without having a full-fledged panic attack. 

Again, thank you to the many, many, many kind people who’ve reached out to me over the last 24 hours. If you celebrate Thanksgiving, I hope yours is restful, and peaceful, and full of joy. If you don’t, I hope your non-holiday days are every bit as nice. 

Yes, it’s a very large picture for a PSA but I really need everyone to read this. I started rping in different fandoms 2015, which turned out to be the best thing I have ever done. Don’t get me wrong, I loved all my years on Tumblr even if things have been tuff with hate and drama. I have really tried to be friends with everyone, tried to include as many as I can in different fandoms but right now all I want to do is close my computer and not write. 

This morning when I woke up, I just stared at my phone almost dreading the thought of writing. Which is a feeling I haven’t experienced in quite some time. Lately, it seems like people have been more interested in the edits, icons, banners, backgrounds, and stuff I can do for free than actually plotting and writing with me. Yes, I have posted started calls, I have posted starters, I have posted open things in the past but I just feel… useless? 

I understand completely when people don’t have the time to reply. I myself have a hard time writing every day. I don’t blame people for not replying to threads or anything it’s just the feeling of being unwanted that bothers me so much. I ask like all the time in different ways if people want to plot and I honestly just get ignored. I do understand that people are busy, I understand that you miss some replies or messages but when you one second come into my inbox and ask me to do edits for you only to ignore me the next, I just don’t understand? 

My hands are legit shaking from writing this. I never want drama. I never want anything else but having fun but I have to ask now. Have I done anything? Is there something I have done that I’m not knowing about or am I just not interesting to write with anymore?

I have debated deleting my blogs. Back and forth all day but in the end, I know how much I would want to write again, how much I would miss the people who just ask me how I’m doing and are sweet. I won’t delete. I can’t do that when I have built so many characters from nothing. My activity won’t be a lot though.

I will check in, reply if someone replies to a thread but until I know if I did anything or if I’m just… someone you befriend to get free icons and stuff… I don’t want to be here. 

I’ll try to write, I’ll try to be happy as I always have been but I just thought I should inform all of you that I might not be as active anymore. I just feel so alone. Which is confusing because some people talk to me a lot but there is those people who get what they want ( edits, icons, psds, backgrounds ) and then just don’t want anything to do with me.

If I don’t answer your messages I can be reached at D!scord : Mama Mini#3223 ( just make sure you tell me who you are in your message otherwise I might block ) 

With that, I guess I’m signing out for tonight. Bye darlings. 

/ Mini

msdistress said: I saw that civilized werewolves being super competitive when it comes to other packs, and now I can only imagine an AU where (adult) Stiles and Scott are renting a house together, and Derek moves in the same area. And while the McCall pack and the entire Hale pack (Talia, Laura, etc.) are on civilized terms, Scott and Derek just can’t help themselves. And maybe a part of the showing off is actually a way to impress (court) Stiles, as in “My lawn ornaments are much nicer than his!”

So this is kind of that, but kind of not? This is pretty silly :) Happy Halloween!

“You’re not dead,” Stiles says as Scott bangs open the door and shucks off his shoes in the next movement. They hit the wall and then bounce into an ungainly pile in the middle of the hallway that Liam will no doubt trip over when he gets home.

“Nope,” Scott says. He looks confused by that part.

“So… That’s good?” Stiles has pumpkin guts all over his hands, but offers Scott a fist bump anyway.

Scott follows Stiles back into the kitchen and then plops down across from Stiles’s half-finished jack-o-lanterns at the counter. He’s a couple weeks early, but Halloween has to be taken seriously. These are practice pumpkins.

Scott says, “It was weird. I think they’re all models. They force-fed me pie.”

Stiles arches a skeptical eyebrow.

“I mean, the pie was great,” Scott says, face screwed up. “I think they were happy I ate the whole thing?”

Werewolf metabolism, Stiles thinks sourly. He’s getting to that age where he has to watch his beer and pizza intake. It sucks. He says, “I’ll make them brownies,” and then apparently it becomes a thing.


Stiles doesn’t know if the Hale pack are actually all models, but they’re definitely taking the supernaturally hot thing to a whole other level.

Scott’s betas are reasonably attractive, sure, but Liam’s the size of a cave troll and Mason’s on this whole hippie-chic kick that makes him look like a train hobo.

Stiles holds out the plate of brownies and tries not to stare at Erica’s boobs. Boyd has the bulging chest of a roman gladiator and Stiles could cut his hands on Isaac’s cheekbones, it’s insane.

Stiles says, “Nice to meet you guys,” and Erica’s lip curls up and her hands hover around the plastic-wrapped plate like it’s made of poison and-or possibly oatmeal. He waggles the plate back and forth. “Promise they’re wolfsbane free.”

And then Jackson fucking Whittmore comes swanning down the staircase and Stiles says, “You’ve got to be shitting me. Jackson?”

“Stilinski,” Jackson says with a scowl.

“Lydia told us you got eaten by a giant lizard.”

Jackson scowls harder. “Fuck off.”

Stiles would like to say that the addition of Jackson makes the pack less appealing, but despite having the personality of a canned ham, Jackson still looks like he was carved out of marble. Balls.

And then someone says, “Do I smell chocolate?” from behind Stiles and he definitely does not jump three feet into the air, but it’s a close call.

He flinches and spins around and says, “Fuck my life.”

The hottest mountain man Stiles has ever seen is frowning at him and Stiles wants to bury his entire body in his beard. He wants to weasel his way under that soft-looking Henley and lick his collarbones. Stiles is ninety-nine percent sure this is Alpha Derek Hale, even though Scott had failed to prepare him for the way Derek’s eyes are eating Stiles’s soul.

Stiles wordlessly holds out the plate of brownies.

Derek takes them with a resigned silence. No one else is saying anything either, and the back of Stiles’s neck is starting to prickle with unease. Are they going to eat him now? They’d moved into town so Liam and Mason could go to the local college, expecting some kind of resistance, territorial posturing, possible brawl for dominance, but Scott had been tirelessly optimistic—even more so since the pie eating thing.

Stiles slinks around Derek, hands up. He says, “I’ll just, uh… leave now,” and backs down the sidewalk so he can see any kind of attack coming. He’s got a taser in his back pocket and he’s not afraid to use it.

The Hale pack all watch him with narrow, calculating eyes and Jackson gives him the finger.

Stiles thinks that if this is the way they react to brownies, he’s going to bake them a motherfucking cake.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Heyyyy welcome back to tumblr, can u write something about reddie? Literally anything, my days kinda sad

Aw no, I hope your day gets better! Here, have the most ridiculous idea I could think of:

  • So you know those lame Home Ec classes? Where you get a robot babydoll and you have to take care of it for a week to simulate parent hood?
  • Yeah
  • Eddie is absent that day they get the assignment, so guess who he gets stuck with, AKA the only kid in class who didn’t get a partner because everyone wants to actually PASS?
  • I’ll give you a hint
  • Richie kicks down Eddie’s front door, the baby’s head sticking out of his backpack
  • “HONEY I’M HOMO! Come meet your son!”
  • The baby is screaming
  • So is Eddie
  • Eddie snatches it from Richie, convinced that he’s going to be a single father for the next week
  • “What’s its name?”
  • “Eddie 2, because he has your eyes!”
  • “You’re a fucking moron.”
  • “EDWARD, please! Don’t use that kind of language around our son!!”
  • Eddie has an existential crisis in the middle of his kitchen because he’s holding a baby while the trashmouth is telling him not to swear
  • Trying to astral project himself back in time to punch Past Eddie in the face for missing class for a Doctor’s appointment 
  • But as it turns out, Richie is all in on this assignment
  • He macgyvers a way to turn his hoodie into a sling so he can do his homework without leaving the baby alone
  • They take turns with who gets the baby during the school day, and Richie thinks its the sweetest damn thing that Eddie keeps sending him texts asking how things are going
  • “Little E2 is great!”
  • “That’s not his name
  • It is his name, Richie already made a fake birth certificate and got a Doctor’s signature (Dr. B Hascom, MD) 
  • He gets extra credit for it too
  • They spend the weekend together, needing to write a paper about the assignment anyway
  • Richie accidentally falls asleep on the couch with the baby cradled to his chest, and Eddie just stares for a while before taking a picture so he can have the image forever
  • But then the baby starts crying, waking Richie up with a groan
  • “Eddie, I decided…I can’t handle being a teen dad. We should have used protection.”
  • Anddddd the soft moment is over just the like that
  • Eddie snatches away the baby from a smirking Richie, regretting every life choice all over again
  • He has the baby in one arm while he makes breakfast the next morning, and Richie teases him for talking to the baby like he’s real
  • “Let me bond with my son, Richie.”
  • Eddie and Richie fight over who has to get up in the middle of the night when the baby starts crying at 2 am, resulting in them both getting pillows to the face
  • “Ugh, et tu, E2? I can’t deal with TWO people trying to get my attention!”
  • “You’re a nerd Richie.”
  • They’re actually really sad when they have to give the baby back, and Richie makes a big show of pretending to cry
  • “They grow up so fast! Our little boy! Can you believe it Eds?”
  • Eddie rolls his eyes, but he can’t help but grin at seeing Richie act so responsible and soft for the last week
  • “No, I can’t believe it at all”

*feel free to add on!*

Forget me not

Thaaaaank you @alwaysfangirly!! 💖 And omg, you’re so kind! And so patient! Because this took me forever and you were so sweet about it! 💖 I hope you like what I did with it! (Even though it might be kinda messy and confusing…) Oh, and I also posted it on AO3, because… well, once more, it turned out longer than I intended…

“Pansy, where was I yesterday?”


“What was I doing? Did you see me talking to anyone?”

Draco paced the length of the eighth year common room, feeling Pansy’s intent stare on him.

“Those are really odd questions to ask. Have you lost your mind?”

“In a manner of speaking,” Draco muttered, stopping in front of the fireplace. “I think someone obliviated me. No, I am sure someone obliviated me.”

He heard Pansy get off the armchair and walk over to him.

“Are you sure? Why would someone do that to you?”

“That’s what I’d like to know,” Draco growled.

“But how can you be sure you’ve been obliviated? I mean, isn’t the point of obliviating someone that they… well, forget?”

Draco scratched the back of his neck, nodding absentmindedly.

“Something just felt off when I woke up this morning. I was sure it was Wednesday but then I saw the Daily Prophet and realised it was already Thursday. I remember everything until Tuesday night and waking up today. But if I try to think about what happened yesterday, my mind just goes blank. I’ve been racking my brain all day long. It’s the only explanation, Pansy. I-”

Draco stopped in his tracks when he saw Potter enter the common room. Something was… weird about him today. He didn’t look at Draco. He hadn’t looked at Draco all day. He always looked at Draco. He probably thought it went unnoticed but, of course, Draco noticed. He always stared right back whenever Potter briefly averted his eyes. Always. But why was Potter avoiding his gaze today?

“Potter!” Without a moment’s hesitation, he strode over to the Gryffindor.

“Hey Malfoy,” he mumbled, his eyes on the carpet.

“Potter, is there something you want to tell me?” Draco inquired, lowering his head to catch the other boy’s eye.

“No?” the Gryffindor said, his voice slightly shaking.

“I think there is. Out with it, Potter! Something happened yesterday, I know it.”

“You do?” Potter said in astonishment, finally looking up. His eyes were full of wonder and… apprehension. “But you shouldn’t-” He broke off, pressing his mouth into a thin line.

“I shouldn’t what?” Draco said, stepping closer and narrowing his eyes. “Remember? You did it, didn’t you? You were the one who obliviated me.”

Potter was trying very hard to keep a straight face, but Draco saw right through him.

“The question is,” he said slowly, lowering his voice, “why did you do it?”

Potter closed his eyes and let out a sigh.

“I’ve been feeling guilty about that all day. I shouldn’t have done it.”

“Then why did you?” Draco asked.

“I panicked, okay? I didn’t do it on purpose. It was like a reflex.”

Now Draco simply had to know what had happened the day before. This sounded serious.

“Show me,” he said, grabbing Potter by the wrist.


“There’s got to be a Pensieve around here somewhere,” Draco muttered, already dragging Potter out of the common room.

“There is, actually,” Potter mumbled behind him.

Draco looked around the memory he and Potter had just dived into. They were in the dungeons and class had just started.

“Professor, why are you showing us Amortentia again?” one of the students asked, sounding more eager than annoyed.

“Because,” Professor Slughorn said with a smile, “I want you to brew an antidote today. So everyone take a quick sniff to get in the right mood and get started.”

Draco frowned as he watched himself go into the storage room, apparently ignoring Slughorn’s instructions. His eyes then fell on Potter, Pensieve-Potter to be precise, who stood in front of the cauldron full of Amortentia. Granger and the Weasel were standing beside him, grinning at each other. It was disgusting.

“What do you smell, Harry?” the Weasel asked. Potter blinked.


“Come on, we’re your friends. You can tell us,” the Weasel insisted, elbowing him.

“No, Ron, I literally smell nothing,” Potter muttered, sounding genuinely surprised.

“That’s strange,” Granger chimed in.

“Yeah.” Potter creased his eyebrows. “I would have thought-” He stopped abruptly as Draco, well, Pensieve-Draco, came into view again, locking eyes with him.

“Professor, have you ever heard of anyone who doesn’t smell anything? In regards to Amortentia, I mean.”

“Hermione,” Potter growled through gritted teeth.

“What, she didn’t say it was you,” the Weasel shrugged. Potter slapped a hand to his forehead and Draco saw himself smirk.

“You don’t smell anything, Potter? That’s pretty pathetic.” When Pensieve-Draco simply strutted back to his desk and began chopping his ingredients, the real Draco frowned.

“So that’s the big secret? This is why you obliviated me?” he asked.

“Wait for it,” Potter mumbled. Was Draco imagining it or were Potter’s cheeks turning a bit rosy? He was biting the inside of his cheek, too, and constantly shifting his weight. He was nervous.

Intrigued, Draco watched as the class proceeded without significant interruptions.

When Slughorn dismissed them and students started hurrying out of the classroom, Draco tapped his foot impatiently. He paused when he saw his past self purposely bump into Potter, causing the Gryffindor to drop all his books.

Smirking to himself, Pensieve-Draco bent down to help Pensieve-Potter pick up his things, quickly scanning the room. They were the only ones left.

“So, you really didn’t smell anything?” Draco heard himself ask. Pensieve-Potter just scowled at him. Draco could see what Pensieve-Potter obviously didn’t; Pensieve-Draco was disappointed. “Nothing at all?”

Getting up, Pensieve-Potter slammed down his books on the desk nearest to him.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but I used to smell… something. So you can save your taunts about-”

“What is that?” Pensieve-Draco suddenly asked. Potter had been draping his Gryffindor scarf around his neck but had halted at the Slytherin’s outburst. The real Draco watched closely as his past self stretched out a hand and examined the scarf.

“What is it now?” Pensieve-Potter said, sounding irritated but also slightly nervous. “It’s my scarf.”

Pensieve-Draco slowly shook his head as he drew out his wand.

“No, something is off.” He pointed his wand at the scarf and before Potter could protest or interfere, he had mumbled, “Revelio.”

Keep reading

just a bet part v

hey !!

sorry this took some time, was an accident i promise

remember if you wanna make moodboards or playlists, you can! just make sure to message it to me so im sure to see it. i appreciate you all so much

thank you for all the support on this story. it truly means the world, especially after that whole story being stolen dilemma.

part one, part two, part three, part four

summary: beverly bets richie he can’t get with the new kid, eddie, and sleep with him in three months. richie disagrees.

pairing: richie x eddie

words: 2056

2 months and 14 days remaining

Eddie knew something was wrong when he walked into school that morning. He felt eyes glued to the back of his head, piercing his skull with their stares. He hated it. He absolutely couldn’t stand it. It was like everyone around him knew something he didn’t. People whispered as he walked by, some even abruptly stopping their conversations when he approached. Eddie balled his hands into fists, attempting to calm his nerves. His hands were shaking a little, his legs a bit wobbly as he walked down the hallway. Eddie finally reached his locker, letting out a breath through his nostrils. His relief didn’t last long, though.

Keep reading


A Bucky Barnes One Shot

Character Pairing: AU Biker!Bucky x Female Reader

Word Count: 3,143

Warnings: Kissing, a heated moment, a bit of angst (blink and you miss it), and so much fluff. Motorcycles and Bucky Barnes… 

A/N: This is my submission for @theassetseyeliner ‘s Erin’s AU Writing Challenge! I’m so glad I chose this one! I hope everyone enjoys it as much as I do!

Prompt: #50: Biker Gang/Punk Gang 


There it was again.

The same sound that kept you up every night.

You loved to keep your windows open in the fall, letting the crisp air waft in while you slept.

But your new next door neighbor was ruining it for you.

Throwing the blankets off your body, you swung your legs over the side of the bed with a huff. Going over to the window, you moved the curtain out of the way to look down at the offending noise.

Across the short lawn that separated your house from his, you saw that he and his friends were in the garage having some sort of get together. There was loud, boisterous laughter and classic rock was blaring.

And he was revving that damn motorcycle.

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My goal at Big East this year was top-25 and to PR. I came in 32nd in an incredibly stacked field and PRed by 40 seconds in the 6k on a very hilly course and frigid conditions, finally reaching into the 21 minute area. I decided to be brave and fearless and go out with the ‘big girls’ in the race, the runners that people know. My name is unknown among these bigger names. I am working to turn that around. From the second the gun went off to running down the final straightaway, I kept repeating, “You can do hard things. You can do hard things.”

I have to sit back for a second and think back to two years ago when I had 2 medical professionals tell me my running career was over. I have to think back to just last cross country season, I struggled so hard and ran 3-4 minutes off of my PRs the entire season. My spirit was so shattered and my heart broke after crossing each line last season. I got my heart broken in more ways than one – in a relationship, with running, and with my own body for feeling like it was “failing me.”

I believe in the girl who kept going and I believe in the girl who woke up every morning this past summer to run and get to the track, even when it was 93 degrees at 7 in the morning, with a fire in her belly and so many goals in her heart. I decided to be brave and to never feel sorry for myself for more than a few seconds.

I have so many dreams in my running career and I fucking will not ever stop striving because running reminds me that I can do hard things. Running makes me a better person. Running has introduced me to the concepts of grit, resilience, strength, and bravery.

I am not the most talented runner, but I work very hard, and I will not stop reaching because I cannot imagine my life any other way.

A 2-For-One Deal

This happened to me in the early 1990’s, and I ended up with revenge I really didn’t deserve. Most good revenge stories are about an a-hole getting what he deserves. In this case, I was the a-hole. LONG STORY!

I was working in a large union manufacturer, and I was the shop’s problem child. At the time, I was a raging alcoholic/addict, and you could fit the fucks I gave into a matchbox and still have room for the matches. I had a big mouth, and a bad attitude, and naturally, management was somewhat less than fond of me.

Of course, being an asshole, I thought I was the persecuted one. It was all about me, don’t you know. My problems with authority was all because of the authorities, and I couldn’t see that my problems were of my own making.

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Pavlovian Coffee

Sterek | Office worker AU | ~1500 words | AO3 | Inspired by this post.

Scott smacked him on the shoulder. “Stop staring. You’re going to end up getting our entire department stuck in a sexual harassment seminar.”

Stiles sighed. “No man that handsome should be that grumpy.”

“You’d be grumpy, too, if you had to be Peter Hale’s assistant. Do your work, Stiles.”

“I’m going to make it my job to see him smile.”

“Do your actual work.”

“Sure, sure,” Stiles said, finally emailing off the spreadsheet he’d finished two hours before. Having an office job, he had found, was really just a giant exercise in figuring out how to waste time so his boss would believe he’d actually put “enough” effort into it. He couldn’t help it if he was efficient.

Now he could spend the rest of the afternoon figuring out how to make Derek Hale smile.


“I got it, I’ll do Pavlovian coffee!” Stiles said at the bar after work.

Scott gave him an unimpressed stare. “Didn’t that just result in the barista hating you last time? I’m pretty sure they started spitting in your drinks.”

Stiles waved a dismissive hand. “That’s just because Lydia Martin had a stupidly complicated order in high school. The theory is still sound. I’ll just bring him coffee until he associates me with delicious caffeine, and then I’ll get to see him smile.”

“At which point your life will be complete?”

“Yes,” Stiles said decisively, picking up his beer again with a blissful smile.

Scott shook his head. “You’re so weird. You need a hobby.” But then Allison from the third floor arrived and he got thoroughly distracted, leaving Stiles to contemplate his perfect plan in peace.

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Jimin’s runaway daughter. pt.5 Finale

Jimin’s DaughterAU!

Genre: Angst

[pt.1] [pt.2] [pt.3] [pt.4] [pt.5 Finale]

Warning: Sensitive Content (mentions of abuse; read at own risk)

Originally posted by blackandwhitebangtan

I woke up the next morning hearing a knock on my door.

“Pumpkin, your mum’s staying home today to look after you okay? Come out and make sure you have breakfast and don’t do anything silly. I want to be able to see you when I get home so don’t coop yourself up in there for too long, it’s unhealthy. I’ll be back late, but I’ll be back tonight. So stay up and wait for me okay? Let’s talk about a few things. I love you, see you later my princess.” After dad’s small speech, I heard his footsteps grew more faint with more steps he took away from my door.

After half an hour, I decided that I needed to get up and out of my room before she comes charging it down and use it as another reason to hit me. Not that she needs a reason because she’d do it anyway, she’d hit me for the hell of it, for fun. I crept downstairs and saw that she was at the kitchen table with her laptop out in front of her, the sound of her long nails tapping at the keys; she was doing work, which meant I should be safe. For now.

Keep reading

Don’t Forget.

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader
genre: smut, dirty talk, dom!jungkook
word count: 1.1k
drabble prompt: “Can you shut up for five minutes, please???” + “Get out of the way before I murder you.” + “I think you forgot who wears the pants in this relationship.”
a/n: for you @chimchiminiecharoo

Keep reading

BTS | Reaction to Waking Up and Not Finding You in Bed|


You woke up to the sound of Jin’s chest rising and falling steadily. After the night you had you felt the need to shower. You unravel yourself from Jin’s arms and legs and quietly get up. You turn on the water hoping it’s not loud enough to wake him, you shower making sure to feel as clean as you can. While you scrub yourself you remember last night. They way Jin touched every part of your body, the trails of kisses he left, the marks on your skin he left behind. The love he showed you yesterday was all remembered every time you touched your skin. You wrap your arms around yourself, hugging yourself tightly wishing it was Jin’s arms instead of your own. After, washing your hair thoroughly you turn off the water but stay in the shower, not wanting to step out into the morning cold. But you do anyway, you change into one of his t shirts and his boxers. The clothes you feel most comfortable in.

You didn’t realize how hungry you were until your stomach growled. You make your way out of the bathroom and throw your clothes in the laundry hamper. Going through your room you see Jin still asleep. You start making your breakfast but seeing as it was almost eleven you figured Jin wouldnt be asleep for much longer so you make breakfast for the both of you. You hear the rustling of covers from your room so you tip toe to the door. Once you peek your head into the room you see Jin’s arm moving up and down trying to find your figure. He sits up with his eyes closed and brows furrowed, “It’s cold.” He whispers in a barely audible tone. You hear nonetheless and stifle a giggle. “Where is she?” He asks himself, still unaware of your presence at the doorway. He lays back down not before screaming, “Jagi!” No answer. “Jagiya!” You walk up to the bed and lay on top of him. “I’m right here” you whisper into his ear. He inhales the scent of your shampoo. “Mm, you smell good.” You laugh into his chest. “But don’t ever get up without me again.” You tilt your head up, “Why not?” He leans his head so that his lips are near your ear, “Because I would have joined you in the shower.”


He had gotten home late last night, you had tried to wait for him to get home but your eyelids were heavy and your body was wrapped in blankets. Sleep took over your body. You woke up the next morning on the bed in the arms of your boyfriend. It took all your might to get up, you didn’t want to leave but you really had to use the bathroom. You hope the shift in the bed wouldn’t cause Yoongi to wake up. Thankfully he stayed asleep, you rush to the bathroom. As you get out of the bathroom, you see Yoongi sitting up. “Y/N, come back to bed.” He mumbles. Trying to wake himself up he rubs his eyes, “I can’t sleep without you here.” He waves you over, opening his arms. You couldn’t resist his cuteness and walk over to him.

“I didn’t know you were clingy Min Yoongi.” A smirk appears on your face. He playfully lets go, lays down, and turns away from you bring the covers around his head so you couldn’t see him. “Yoongi…Yoongi” you gently shake him. “I’m sorry, come on your not mad are yo-“ Your words were cut off when Yoongi pulled you down with him. “Maybe I am. I just can’t be without you.” He smirks at your blushing face. You pull the duvet over your head to hide your blush. “Babe, I know I’m cute but that’s not what I want to do right now.” Laughing at his words you push his chest gently, loving the warmth it brings your hand.


The whole night you spent cuddling with Namjoon. His arms were the safest place you could ever be in. But right now his arm was the only thing constricting you of getting coffee. Coffee was your go to item in the morning. Once you wake up you would immediately go to make coffee or buy some at Starbucks but last night was the first time you slept over at Najoons place. He was so flustered and cute when you asked if you could spend the night. “Sl-Sleep over? Here? With me? But… But you don’t have any clothes. What about your toothbrush? And your comb?” You started to wonder if he didn’t want you to sleepover so you asked him. “No, no jagi. Of course I want you to sleep over, I just want you to be comfortable here.” “I’m comfortable anywhere you are.” After your conversation he lent you some of his shorts and one of his t shirts. You stayed up watching movies until both of you fell asleep.

By now your need for your morning coffee made you unwrap his arm from your waist. Getting up, you walk to his kitchen. “Where’s the coffee?” You whisper to yourself. You don’t know where he keeps his coffee. You don’t want to ask him because then you’ll have to wake him up. You open cabinets quietly trying to locate the container of coffee. After five minutes of looking for it you go to the bedroom to ask Namjoon. “Hey, Oppa.” You say while still on your way to the room. Once you reach the doorway you see him making the bed, perfectly placing the pillows on top. “I didn’t want you to get up.” You tell him as you make your way to him. “I can’t sleep when your not pressed against me.” You give him a kiss on the cheek and lay him down. You lean in for a kiss. His lips instantly move in sync with yours. A low moan comes out of his mouth and you knew the bed wouldn’t be made for much longer


He was such a heavy sleeper, you wouldn’t think he would get up for anything. Your phone started to ring, picking it up you look at the caller id and see that it was your sister calling. She still didn’t know that you were in a relationship, let alone with Hoseok. You get up from the bed without any thought of being quiet. “Hey H/N, what happened?” You make your way out of the room. “How could you not tell me?” How did she find out? You didn’t tell anyone, as much as you are close you never told your sister because you didn’t want it to get out and affect Hobi. “W-What are you talking about?” She sighs on the other end. “Why didn’t you tell me you had a boyfriend? I tell you everything and yet you don’t tell me anything.!” You always wanted to tell her, she was your best friend. Every time you had a crush or a problem you went to her. It was easy having someone close to your age always around but when you met Hobi at the theatres looking lost you couldn’t help but help him. After that he started learning more English and you started learning Korean. You couldn’t tell her because you were scared she would judge you because of the language barrier.

“I’m sorry, it’s just that when we first met each other we couldn’t understand each other or his friend had to translate everything for us. I know you don’t understand how people can have feelings for someone else when they have no idea what the other person is saying.” “Y/N, I don’t understand. How did you become affectionate towards him if you can’t understand him. How did you get to know the real him? I don’t get it, is it only because he’s attractive?” A tear starts rolling down your cheek. “How could you think that? I’m not a shallow pers-“ Before you could register what happened, Hoseok takes the phone from your hand and puts it on his ear. “Yes, hello. Yeah this is Jung Hoseok. Y/N’s boyfriend. I don’t know what you’re saying but don’t make my girlfriend cry I love her very much. Oh you’re her sister, I don’t know how you treat each other but sisters aren’t supposed to make each other cry.”


You had a hard time going to sleep last night. You always got a little bit of sleep and that would worry Jimin. Hed feel so bad that he could fall asleep so easily while you would stay up trying your best to sleep. The noise from outside distracting you, filling your mind with so much noise that sleeping wasn’t an option. The lights from the sidewalk, illuminate your boyfriends sleeping figure. He looked so peaceful when he was asleep. You quit trying to go to sleep and get up. You thought you would go running to tire you out. You put on your running shoes and head out. The world seemed at peace during nighttime. It was the natural state of things, the sound of the wind blowing, the moonlight illuminating the dark night, it was a beauty you fell in love with.

But on restless nights like tonight you couldn’t help but loathe that beauty. All you wanted was to sleep with your boyfriend. With his arm draped around your waist and his body close to yours giving you warmth and protection. You turn around ending your midnight run before getting a call. “Y/N.” The groggy sound coming from the other line tells you that it’s Jimin. From the sound of it he hasn’t been awake for long. “Go back to sleep, I’m heading back.” You hear nothing but his breaths through the phone. Thinking he was asleep you go to end the call, “Y/N. I need you here. I want to help you sleep” Oh, Jimin. How did I ever get someone like you? You think to yourself. “ Okay I’ll be right there.” You get to your house and find your way to the bedroom where you see Jimin with a cup of chamomile tea and warm fuzzy blankets. “Here. I won’t go back to sleep unless I know that your sleeping right beside me.” He pulls you into bed and tucks you into the fuzzy blankets. “Jimin. I love you.” You say while yawning. “Shh. I know just go to sleep.” Your eyes felt heavy with the need to sleep. Right before your eyes fully close and the darkness pulls you in you hear, “I love you too.”


The coldness of the morning overwhelmed your body, Tae has hogged the covers again. You tried to get another cover but he had stopped you. “Y/N, you’ll get warm with my body heat.” You sighed,”You always take the covers, even if I sleep right next to you.” He pouted and crosses his arms,”I promise. I won’t take the covers. Sleep next to me please.” You admit defeat and stomp over to the bed, laying down next to Tae. He loves the way your body fits into his, as if you were made for each other. The warmth of his body is the last thing you feel before plunging into the ever so sweet state of sleep.

“Tae. Tae, give me some cover.” You try everything to wake him up but he won’t. “Tae!” An exasperated sigh comes out of your mouth. “Now I have to get up and get a cover. I had told you that you were going to steal the covers away but you promised so I took your word. I should have known that you were but you were pouting and acting all cute and I couldn’t take it. Why? Why do I love you so much? Why must you do this to me? Ah, I don’t want to get up but I’m cold and it’s all your fault. You even wrapped the cover around your legs. That’s a talent you know. Fine, fine I’ll get up. But only because I’m cold.” After your rant, you get up. On your way back with one of your extra covers you hear laughter coming from your room. You walk into the room seeing light from Taehyung phone. “hy do I love you so much? Why must you do this to me? Ah, I don’t want to get up but I’m cold and it’s all your fault. You ev-“ That was your voice, your rant that was playing on his phone. “Tae? What is that?” He looks up at you with a boxed smile and laughs. “I don’t know, you tell me what this is and why you were talking to yourself.” You leap onto the bed and wrestle him for his phone. He puts his arm up while your on top of him. “Tae give it to me. Or delete it.” “How about I do this instead?” He closes the gap between you to press his lips against his. You feel his smile through the kiss, “Why do I love you so much?”


The sounds of Jungkook’s game was enough to drive you insane but what really drove you over the ledge was him telling you that he would go to sleep after he finished his game. That’s was an hour ago and now it’s 2:30 in the morning. “Babe, I can’t sleep with the volume up. You can play games but at least put on your headphones.” He paused the game and turned towards you. “I’m sorry. I’ll just play tomorrow. Let’s go to sleep.” He climbs in next to you. “I didn’t mean to get carried away. I just got lost in the game.” You don’t blame him, that’s actually one of the reasons you fell in love with him. He gets so involved in the game that he thinks he’s actually there. You understand at a certain degree. You loved books as much as he loved games.

He would listen to you go on and on about the current book you were reading and it was perfect. He listened so passionately, nodding his head in reassurance and you did the same when he was talking about his games. But yesterday felt unbearable, and now as you wake up while he’s still asleep you make him breakfast. The smell of coffee and French toast woke him up. As you take it to him, you see the smile on his face.

More Things to Add To Your Bullet Journal

If you want to see my first two posts about things you can add to your journal, click [here] or [here]. 

These are things anyone can add to any part of your journal. Enjoy!

1. Follower Counter

I have done this in my past two journals because I love giving myself that little boost of inspiration to keep doing this with all of you. I also enjoy keeping track of when I get another thousand followers. You can use this for any social media; Instagram, Twitter, Tumblr, etc. I have done it in two different ways, but I prefer the circular one I had in my other journal. 

2. Index

I noticed that on both my lists of what to add to your journal, I completely forgot to include the index and icons. I figured some people who are new to bullet journaling might not know to put these things in their journals. An index is super important to have in your journal, and remember to number your pages! 

3. Icons

Again, I also forgot to talk about icon pages. Also, something important to add to your journal. You can also add a color index if you use certain highlighters, pens, or markers for certain things. 

4. Packing List

I have had a packing list in every journal I have used. If you’re anything like me, you wind up forgetting things when you travel. I have separate lists for each group of things I need to pack.

5. Monthly Goals

This is something I recently started doing in my newest journal. It keeps me grounded and focused on things that I need to get done before each month is over. 

6. Morning Routines

Not every morning is the same, so when you make this part of your journal try to make seven different spaces for your morning routines. Unless you do have the same exact routine for each day, then just write it out on one page.

7. Nightly Routines

The same advice that I had for morning routines is the same for nightly routines. Please plan before you start writing in pen!

8. Weight Tracker

I don’t have a page for this in my newest journal. I just write my weight down in my daily tracker, but I did have a page in my older journal for it. If you’re trying to lose weight, this is a very good tool to use. 

9. Pen Test Page

I didn’t realize people did this already, but I find it to be a good idea. Test your pens for bleeding, ghosting, and for color. It will definitely help you in the long run.

10. Brain Dump

This is such a good idea. I had a page of this in my other journal. If you think of something silly, interesting, or to remember later, write it here. 

11. Spending Log/Receipt Keeping

I know a few people that like to keep track of everything they spend each month and from what store. I have a small binder that I keep my receipts in. It took me two hours to make the folders, label them, and hole-punch them. If you want to do it in a journal, that’s good too. Add folders in your journals with washi tape or keep a log of what you spend.

12. Monthly Water Tracker

Instead of doing a daily water intake tracker on each weekly page, try doing it on one page for the whole month. You’ll have more space on your weekly pages and it will all be in the same place for you to see. 

13. Places to Travel

This was one of my favorite pages to make. If you want to know more about it, click [here] to see my post of it. 

14. Favorite Name List

If you have favorite baby names, city names, story character names, or just really cool names you want to remember, write them down! 

15. Looking Forward To…

If you struggle with trying to stay positive, this is the page for you. Write down anything that you are looking forward to. Birthdays, parties, movie releases, seeing your pet grow up, growing out your hair, losing weight, pay day, etc. Find something to look forward to even if it seems insignificant to what society says you should hope for. 

16. Compliment List

I haven’t done this page yet, but I like the concept. You can either write down original compliments people have given you or ones you thought of on your own. This made me think of all the things Leslie Knope gave Ann. 

17. Level 10 Life

If you want to know exactly what Level 10 Life is, click [here] for my original post on it.

18. Pet Care Log

This is such a good idea. Click [here] for my original post about how I take care of my pups. 

19. Achievement List

Need some reminding of how you are the bomb? Make a list of EVERY achievement you’ve ever accomplished. Even if it’s something small, write it down. You are amazing and deserve to know it. 

20. Dream Journaling 

I haven’t done this since I was in middle school,  but it’s a good practice to keep. Sometimes dreams mean something and it’s good to write down what you remember from them so you can look back and see why your mind was thinking about such things. 

How to be/become a morning person!

Ok so i know many people hate the morning bc u know u gotta get out that warm bed and start the day, but believe me, mornings are actually really nice! And if you start the day early and get things done u feel so much better throughout the day, so here are a couple of tips to help you become (and stay lol) a morning person!

1. start the day early. you don’t have to all of sudden wake up at 6 am, just do it in steps. 10 min earlier every day is a great routine to have untill you are at the time you wanna wake up. 

2. ok, So this may be the hardest one, but also the best. Don’t hit snooze! It is so much better to just get up when your first alarm goes off. 

3. Put your telephone on the other side of the room so you really gotta get up. (believe me, this really helps you to sleep better too)

4. Make a big healthy delicious breakfast! If you do that you will be looking forward to waking up.

5. Listen to music! This will put you in a good mood

6. Get shit done. Make your bed. Write the things down you have to do that day. Etc..

these were the tips, I hope they will help you!

Did you hear that?!

This was a request! Send me more!!!!

Shawn and you have been together for over a year now. It took you a while to finally trust that he wasn’t gonna leave you, like all the rest.

You were extra careful with your heart, since it’s just not yours in danger anymore.

You introduced Shawn to your daughter three months into the relationship. It was nerve wracking. 

How would Shawn respond?

How would your daughter respond?

But they fell for each other too. 

She has got Shawn wrapped around her tiny little finger. From the first second he met her, she had him beat. He did anything she wanted him too, even to your protests. 

“No, no ice cream before dinner.” You warned her.

“Come one babe, just a small scoop.” He plead already getting her a bowl out. 

But he loved it. He was so good with her. He was so worried that she wouldn’t like him, but she loved him. 

It was Shawn’s third night back from a small tour he had. He had just gone to the states for two weeks for some promo and a few shows. But he was back and had been staying with you at your small two bedroom apartment. 

“One more show Mommy! Please.” You baby girl pleaded. She was pulling your heart strings for sure. She was snuggled up with Shawn under a blanket, he was playing with her hair a bit and was looking just as sleepy as she was. 

“Yeah one more show babe.” He whined too, they both looked over at you with their signature puppy dog look. It amazed you that even though they weren’t related in any way, they still acted much the same.

“Last episode.” You gave in sighing against the couch. They both cheered, Shawn clicking play on the next episode. 

He reached out and grabbed your fingers, playing with them. You looked at him and caught his gaze. 

“I love you.” He whispered. 

“Yeah, you’re both lucky you’re cute.” You say squinting at him. He chuckles and your daughter squirms a bit, shifting into Shawn’s side. She leans her head on his chest and he holds her a little tighter.

You sat there and just watched them. It was a picture you would die for. He was holding her like she was his own, and she was snuggled up like he was hers. To be honest, they were. Shawn saw your baby as his too, he’s been around to long not to. 

Her dad was out of the picture. He up and left when you found out you were pregnant. Four years later and you found Shawn. Now she’s five and has that father figure in her life. 

“Is she sleeping?” He asked, pulling you from your thoughts. 

“Um.” You leaned forward slowly. “Yeah.” You laughed softly. He did too as you stood up. You gently started picking her up and she woke up fighting you off. 

“Come on, time for bed.” You said trying to get her again. 

“No.” She whined holding on to Shawn. 

“Come on, it’s time for bed.” You said again, changing your tone. 

“Night baby.” Shawn kissed the top of her head as she gave in and let you pick her up. You took her to her room and tucked her into bed. You kissed her head turned on her night light before walking out of the room. 

“She went down that easy?” Shawn asked as you sat next to him. You nodded as you leaned your head on his shoulder, his arm going around yours. 

“You can be such a brat with her.” You tease laughing.

“What? How can I not?” He says kissing your forehead.

The both of you start to watch the show Shawn had changed it to and sat in each others arms for awhile. 

You were starting to doze off a bit when you heard a door open. You heard a sniffle and then a hiccup. 

Soon enough the little girl walked out, tears running down her face, looking at her feet. You sat forward, Shawn waking up and becoming worried.

“Honey? What’s wrong?” You asked. 

“I had a nightmare.” She cries.

“Awe honey, let me take you back to  bed.” You start to get up.

“No I want Daddy.” She says softly. You stop short.

At first you think of the asshole that left you. How could she want him? She’s never met him. 

But then it hits you.

She just called Shawn, Dad. Daddy to be exact. 

You look over at Shawn and he’s frozen. 

She hiccups again and he jumps up from his spot on the couch.

“Daddy.” She says running to him and he picks her up, holding her to his chest. He looks at you confused, but also with a small smile. 

“Come on,” He says walking back to her room. You get up and follow behind, waiting in the hall. 

She explains her nightmare, Shawn listening intently. He assures her that there aren’t any monsters under bed, but checks just to be safe. He also checks her closet and sits next to her telling her how he would fight them off. 

“They should be scared of you.” She sniffles. 

“Trust me, they are. I can get them.” He says proudly. He starts to rub her back and softly sing to her until she falls asleep. 

When he walks out of her room he leans back against the wall across from you. 

“Shawn?” You ask as he closes his eyes leaning his head back.

“Did you hear that?” He asks looking at you. 

A smile sweeps across his face. 

“She called me Daddy.” He says becoming happier. “She called me Daddy on her own, no one asked her too. She did it on her own.” He says, more to himself. 

“What do you think of that?” You ask, still worried that that might freak him out.

“I think that that’s the greatest thing that I have ever felt.” He said looking at you. You smile and reach out for him. 

“She called me Dad.” He says again as he hugs you. 


The next morning you both are in the kitchen making breakfast when you hear the sound of little feet running to you. 

“Mommy! Daddy!” She cheers running to Shawn first.

He picks her up and kisses her cheek.

“Hey baby.” He smiles as she leans over and kisses your cheek. 

“Want some pancakes?” You ask her. “Shaw- Dad made them.” You correct yourself.

“Yummy!” She says as Shawn lets her down. She climbs her seat and gets ready to eat. 

Shawn smiles and shakes his head as he start cutting up her pancakes.

“What?” You ask nudging his arm.

“I just love that she is calling me Dad.” He shrugs. 

“Honestly.” You say, him looking at you. “Me too.” You smile. 

He smiles too and leans down and kisses you. 

You were a family. 

You, your baby girl, and now Shawn. 

meet solangelo: college friends edition
  • imagine: nico and will, living together in an apartment in *insert a city with a college with a great medical programme*
  • nico doesn’t really do school, but he does internet courses on linguistics while will attends med school
  • and one day will is supposed to work on some group project or another, and they go to the library only to discover it closed for maintenance or something, idk it’s not important really
  • the point here is that after talking about their options will sighs a little and goes, “well, i guess we can go to our place, nico is probably home but i don’t think he’ll mind”
  • (secretly he thinks nico is probably asleep anyway, but doesn’t say anything)
  • so they go to the apartment, and see nico playing video games
  • and ofc the other people in the group are curious about the mysterious nico that will barely ever stops talking about
  • like seriously, nico is mentioned in every other sentence
  • “- and i went home and nico had made this awesome chicken pasta sauce that -“
  • “- just like that, even nico said it’s crazy -”
  • “- just last week nico showed me this documentary -”
  • and they think this nico person must be one hell of a roommate if a guy like will is so over the moon with him
  • but nico barely looks up from his game when will calls for him, too focused on his game
  • “have you even moved from that spot since this morning?”
  • “once or twice”
  • “have you eaten?”
  • “yes, mom
  • will and his course friends set up around the kitchen island and get to work, and like a good host will brews them coffee
  • he asks nico if he wants any, and what nico answers is just a bunch of words in a language the other guys don’t understand but sound like curse words
  • will only rolls his eyes, but the others are pretty taken aback, because this is the infamous nico that’s so great???
  • during the maybe half an hour that nico sits on the couch and the others work on their project, nico doesn’t manage to improve the first impression
  • basically he seems rude and grumpy, and he talks to will like he barely stands him, and will just??? sits there??? and occasionally rolls his eyes, like this is a daily occurrence? like what??
  • eventually nico stops his game and wanders to the kitchen, not sparing the rest of the people there a look as he goes straight to the fridge
  • “i thought we still had juice?”
  • “we would have if you had gone to the store today like i asked you”
  • “you asked me to go to the store?”
  • “multiple times, nico”
  • and all this while will doesn’t even look up from his text book, perfectly capable of scanning the pages for information while having a row with his apparently real ass of a roommate
  • (”dude, he really needs to find a new roommate”, one of the guys whispers to the other two, and they both nod, kind of worried about will)
  • nico huffs and looks kinda dangerous when he stomps out of the kitchen and to the hall, and they hear the jingle of keys that signal nico is going somewhere
  • they hope it’s the store and that he stays there until they’ve left
  • “did you forget something, di angelo???”
  • and wow, they’ve never heard will sound like that, like half-annoyed and half-exasperated, with a tinge of something that’s almost amusement but not really? what?
  • and then
  • then
  • they hear a very audible sigh from the hall, and nico walks back to the kitchen, straight to will, and kisses him
  • and not like, a peck on the cheek or even a sarcastic one on the lips
  • a real, slow, open mouthed kiss, with tongue, and he has both his hands on will’s cheeks and it looks so tender 
  • and it seems like the kiss goes on and on and on, even though it barely lasts five seconds
  • but nico leans back slowly, and then there’s a small peck on the lips, and stop the press, is that a smile???
  • “you’re a fucking asshole”, nico says, but it’s not spat out like everything else they’ve heard him say
  • no, this is soft and sweet, almost as if asshole is a pet name, and it occurs to them that maybe they weren’t supposed to be listening in on that?
  • and will, the cool guy that (in their eyes) ten seconds ago was in desperate need of a new, more respectful roommate, smiles at nico like he hung the sun and the stars, and says, just as softly, “i love you too. buy some ice cream?”
  • “you ate the ice cream???”
  • “we can order italian for dinner”
  • and meanwhile will’s course friends sit there with their mouths wide open like, what the hell is going on, who is this guy???
  • because nico seems completely different from the person that they saw just like, barely a minute ago
  • and then nico is gone, just like that, and will turns back to his work like nothing happened, and as the apartment door slams shut the others just look at will with round eyes like explain this 
  • “so like… you’re together?” is what they manage to ask first
  • will looks up from his notes, a little startled, and answers a little “yes?” like he thinks it was obvious
  • and okay, maybe it was obvious, but like
  • “for how long???”
  • and will actually stops to think for a few seconds, before his eyes get this strange glint and he says “seven years this november”
  • the guys look at each other, puzzled
  • like, maybe it would have made more sense to them if they had been together for less than a year, still adjusting to their places in each other’s lives, still learning their way around
  • but seven years???
  • “that’s longer than my dad was together with my mom” one of them blurts out in shock
  • “i was so sure you were going to ask ruby out by thanksgiving” says another
  • “and here i was going to suggest you find a more respectful roommate”
  • let’s just say that they have to reschedule dong the project, because these guys are goddamn noisy and want to know everything they’ve missed about will and nico’s relationship
  • “did you guys meet in high school or something?”
  • “wait, so when veronica asked you out and you turned her down, it wasn’t just because she’s a girl?”
  • “how come he talks to you like that?”
  • the guys are out before nico returns, insisting that they can meet up another time, clearly already gossiping about the new info they have on their friend
  • and will is not stupid, he knows that nico seemed super rude to them, but he also knows that it doesn’t matter as long as the two of them know what’s up
  • and maybe, just maybe, will starts planning a get together where his college friends can meet nico, properly this time