Ronan and Romance.
Blue: So how did you finally win Adam Parrish’s heart?
Ronan: Well, Sargent, it went something like this: - *counts on fingers* - first, I dragged him behind my car, then I insulted his girlfriend (that was you - sorry, bro), then I beat up his dad, then I paid his rent without telling him, then I slept on his floor and THEN I showed up at his work with a ten-foot monster bird and asked him to help me blackmail our latin teacher-
Blue: That went well, I take it?
Ronan: Well no, he kicked me out, so I broke into his car and left him some hand lotion and a mix tape with only the Murder Squash Song on it.
Blue: I have a vague memory of that tape.
Ronan: It worked! So I took him to see some cows, then we went shopping and I crashed a grocery cart with him in it-
Blue: Gansey never did that to me.
Ronan: See, you need to know how to pick’em. Anyway, there was a slight snafu in a church involving some bodyparts in an envelope and my own bloody corpse, but we got through it, it’s all good. I went on to produce a hooved supernatural child who eats everything in sight -(he adores her, it’s really sweet), acted as his personal chauffeur during an evening hunt for the Devil, then took him to do a little frolicking in a magical woods where I gave him a nervous breakdown by revealing that said magical woods came from inside my head-
Ronan: - *glares* - He got over it, alright?! Anyway: finally, on my 18th birthday party, after accidentally calling him a shithead, I sent him upstairs to my bedroom for some aluminum foil and there, I kissed him on the mouth after playing a little too long with a toy car and presto! One Parrish-Lynch coalition in the bag!
Blue: If that worked, you deserve each other.
Ronan: - *beams* - Thanks!