me arm is dead

dad and i watch captain america: the winter soldier
  • dad: oh god it's starting shut up i've been waiting for this for months
  • (movie starts)
  • dad: THESE ARE THE BICEPS OF FREEDOM
  • dad: i don't know what's happening but the french guy fighting cap looks like french macklemore
  • me: how do you even know who macklemore is?
  • dad: i'm hip. i'm cool
  • me: don't you do it
  • dad: i'm gonna pop some tags, only got 20 baguettes in my pocket
  • (five minutes later)
  • dad: is that the Falcon? that's totally the Falcon
  • me: how do you know?
  • dad: i used to read the comic books trust me on this i'm an expert. his superpower was that he could talk to birds
  • me: birds?
  • dad: i mean in hindsight it probably wasn't the most useful thing ever
  • dad: if this winter soldier is supposedly a ghost in the machine that nobody's ever seen, and nobody will ever catch, you would think showing up in broad daylight and blowing up cars would not be his modus operandi
  • dad: how the heck did he laser through concrete??
  • me: idk dad it's nick fury he can probably do whatever he wants
  • dad: i'm sorry attractive nurse who just so happens to live next door, my heart belongs to a seventy year russian dude with a bionic arm
  • me: what
  • dad:
  • dad: nick fury isn't dead. justice never dies. he probably has a billion clones in some top secret storage facility, just waiting for their organ harvest.
  • me: ew dad gross no
  • dad: i really relate to that apple store employee
  • me: we all do dad
  • dad: oh that's that guy from the first movie! i remember him! he was my favorite, his eyes were so blue, and he loved steve so much. i wanted them to get together
  • me: dad good god
  • dad: he was a little less marilyn manson at that point though
  • dad: not that guyliner isn't a good look for this guy
  • dad: when a deadly russian assassin wears eyeliner, it's 'he's so dreamy' and 'wow what a badass'
  • dad: but when i do it it's 'you're too old' and 'bald guys can't pull off make-up'
  • me: dad it was halloween and it was one time you need to let this go
  • dad: so bucky barnes, aka cute cocky guy who died in the first movie, aka steve roger's best friend/boyfriend, is a top secret super scary brainwashed hydra agent?
  • me: mmm-hm
  • dad: called it
  • dad: do you think single handedly destroying jets is just a common, everyday thing for cap? punch a few tanks, feed a few pigeons, take out a plane, help old ladies cross the street...
  • dad: captain america is like your grandad minus the booze and the cussing
  • dad: in all honesty that was a little anti-climactic
  • dad: i was 100% sure nick fury was gonna descend majestically from the heavens, 'All I do is Win' blaring in the background, and single-handedly save everyone's ass
  • dad: scarjo and chris evans are two of the most beautiful people in the world and they are both in this movie and i don't know how to feel about it i have butterflies in my stomach i'm a schoolboy again
  • me: you know on second thought we should have brought mom
  • dad: where's hawkeye? where's bruce? where's tony? where's thor? WHERE ARE ALL THE OTHER AVENGERS AS THE ENTIRETY OF SHIELD IS COMPROMISED AND NICK FURY DIES
  • me: maybe they figured steve could handle it
  • dad: maybe they're all lazy assholes
tight spaces.

Originally posted by esgaroths

steve x reader 

warnings: swearing, basically pure fucking smut, choking.

prompt: getting stuck in a closet with steve rogers and his tight pants while on a mission.

A/N: once again, this is just pure unedited smut so here you go. feel free to send in requests. :-)

“you better not fucking leave me!” you hissed, gripping steve by the arm and looking him dead in the eyes.

“i wasn’t leaving, i was just going to check if the coast is clear.” he grumbled, rolling his eyes.

“of course it’s not fucking clear, there’s hydra agents all over the fucking place, you dumb fuck!” your heart beat was erratic as you dug your nails into his arm, glaring at him.

“there’s no need for that!” steve announced, just to be shushed by you.

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Save or Break

Pairing: Dean x Reader, Matt (OC)

Warnings: Lots of angst, language, mentions of death

Word count: 1482

Summary: Dean thinks the reader left him for someone else but is that the real reason?

A/N: This fic is for my newly introduced “songfic friday”. Song inspiration for this one was “Breakeven” by The Script.

Originally posted by bittercasblogger

“Sometimes the strongest among us are the ones who smile through silent pain, cry behind closed doors, and fight battles nobody knows about.” -Unknown


Dean’s loud voice, thick with anger and despair filled your ears as you threw your clothes haphazardly into your suitcase.

“What do you think you’re doing Y/N? You’re going to bail out on me and Sammy just like that? After everything we have went through you’re going to call it quits? Because of what? Is it me? Did I do something wrong?”

Hearing his words brought tears to your eyes. You were seconds away from breaking his heart but you had to do this. You did not have another choice, not after what you had found out a while ago. Your hands were shaking; you stopped what you were doing and took a deep breath. Turning towards your soon to be ex-boyfriend, you looked into his eyes. He stopped with his wild gestures, his chest heaving from all the anger and frustration.

You swallowed the lump in your throat and started to speak, trying to sound as cold as possible. “I can’t do this anymore Dean. I don’t want to. Yes, I quit. I’m leaving you. This was never the life I imagined for myself. I want more, okay? And you can’t give me more Dean. I’m sorry.”

His arms dropped dead to his sides. His mouth fell slightly open and a shocked expression spread across his face as he stared at you, letting your words sink in. “You’re… What? Why? I thought… I mean we talked about this. You never wanted more. What changed?”

You could see in his slumped shoulders and teary eyes how much you had hurt him. ”I have to do this,” you kept telling yourself in your mind.

“I-I don’t know Dean, okay? I simply changed my mind. I want to get married and have kids and I want to come home to something that is not as broken as what we have. Let me go Dean. I’m done. Let me be happy.” 

You continued to pack the last pieces of clothing and zipped your suitcase; you didn’t have the courage to look him in the eyes right now. The guilt you felt when doing so made you question your decision but there was no going back now.

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Admit It

Anon Prompt: “Hi, can you do one where Juggie gets really jealous of best friend Y/N because she always goes out but she is just doing it on purpose? Because she likes him? Then they admit their feelings.”

Word Count: 2.2k

Tags: Underage drinking, borderline underage alcoholism, underage sex, smut, porn with plot, swearing. I know you said smut or fluff but there’s going to be smut and angst

A/N: I just wanted to say that I’m really thankful for the kind messages from everyone and for the followers who have been so patient with me. I’m sorry it’s been so long. I’ve also never written heterosexual smut before, so sorry if it sucks!! Smut is in the read more, so don’t read if you’re uncomfortable with smut and non asexual jughead 

Originally posted by bettytail


The people around me cheer as I furiously chug the beer, I’m in a race against Reggie Mantle.
Loser must buy the winner a life time supply of Pop’s whenever they want.

Half of the party seems to be cheering me on, whilst the other cheers for Reggie’s victory; from the corner of my eye, I look over at Reggie who at the wrong time, sucks in air and ends up choking, he spits beer everywhere.
I finish mine and crush the can triumphantly; I smile at Reggie who is wiping beer of his face.

“Good game, Mantle.” I laugh, holding my hand out.

“I can’t believe I lost to a girl.” He huffs, shaking my hand.

“Didn’t you get the memo, Reggie? Chauvinism is dead.” Jughead says, wrapping his arm around me.

“Hey Juggie!” I giggle, the alcohol is going to my head, so is the loud thrum of the music.

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anonymous asked:

Solangelo cuddles?

When Nico was younger - young enough to still be short and scowley but old enough to have lost his sister and fought in a war - he’d hated human touch.

There was something invasive about it. His skin was his and it was all that he had left, except for his shadows and if you took away his body bit by bit eventually you’d take the shadows too.

But he hated it - he’d wince when somebody would push past him in a busy street because it’d set off all these alarm bells ringing in his head. It’s why he liked the Underworld. There, not many things could try to touch you, not physically. Not many things would dare to touch you when the bear the title of the Ghost King.

It’s why he avoided Camp Half-Blood, where somebody always seemed to have an outreached hand. Nico wonders just how many times he pushed past Will Solace, scowled at the brush of their skin together and shuddered at the thought of ever shaking his hand.

Three years later he supposes that the thought is quite ironic.

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My Mistake Chapter 2

Pairing: AJ Styles x OFC (Jessica), mention of AJ x Charlotte

Rating: General

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 1,572

Summary: Jessica, a stylist for WWE, has a special friendship with AJ Styles, spending most of her time with him. But after the Superstar Shake-up and Charlotte coming to Smackdown, Jessica’s relationship with AJ changes drastically. And Jessica is not sure she can handle these changes.

Inspiration: “It’s my mistake for not making you love me more. It’s my mistake for loving you more than you love me. I did not make you love me more as much as I do. It’s my mistake” - SNSD “My Mistake”

Chapter 1

“Okay Jess, truth time.” Carmella says, bouncing onto the bed, finishing having showered and changed, curling up next to me.

I had bribed Tamina with the key to my hotel room, since I was rooming by myself, she jumped at the chance to not be forced to sit through our shitty picks of movies to watch tonight. Like they were the types of movies that are so bad they’re good, with the horrible animation and everything. But we did through in a few of my favorites to make me feel better, like “Robin Hood Men in Tights” I need a good laugh. Anyway, Carmella and I would have gone to my room, but my room, like always, is right next door to AJ’s and I just didn’t want to deal with him. Not tonight anyway.

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{Reaction} Gang EXO falling in love with their bosses daughter while they were supposed to guard them.

Note: So, admittedly I did struggle with this one a little so I hope it’s alright. Please enjoy anon and anyone else reading! ~Mami

Disclaimer: I don’t own the gifs/images used.

Main Masterlist - EXO Masterlist

Park Chanyeol

Originally posted by daenso

When Chanyeol finds out he has the opportunity to protect you, he jumps at the chance. Not just because he likes protecting people, but also because he knows how beautiful and amazing you are since the boss talks about you a lot. When Chanyeol met you for the first time, his feelings were nothing more than a small crush, but as time went on, his feelings progressed and he found himself falling in love. A part of him would be really happy about it, since there isn’t a lot in his life that keeps him happy anymore, but he would also be upset, knowing how minimal the chance is that the relationship would work in such a rough business.

Chanyeol: “{y/n} if you accept my love, then I’ll stop all of this. I’ll give up the gang and we can live a normal life. We can get married and buy a house with a garden and a dog. We can think about having children and taxes. I promise that if you accept me, I’ll do everything I can to turn this all around.”


Do Kyungsoo/ D.O.

Originally posted by kyungception

Kyungsoo didn’t have a say when he was told you needed to be guarded, and frankly, he wasn’t happy about it at first. At the start, he wouldn’t talk to you much. He’d make sure you were safe and nothing more, he didn’t want to get involved with you more than he needed to. But as time moved on, that became increasingly difficult, especially since you were so sweet. It started off that you offered to talk to him about his problems, and for a long time he wouldn’t. But when you got him to open up and trust you, he did. That’s when he started falling in love, and that was the point of no return.

Kyungsoo: “Would you ever date someone from a gang?”

{y/n}: “Maybe, why do you ask?”

Kyungsoo: “I was just wondering…”


Byun Baekhyun

Originally posted by ethereal-baek

Baekhyun doesn’t have the ‘ladies man’ image for no reason. When he’s told he’s guarding you, he sees this as a perfect opportunity to woo you {he doesn’t care if you’re the boss’s daughter, if he sees something he wants, he isn’t going to hold back.} For a long time, his attitude was simple flirting and persuading you into one night stands {but since it’s him, he didn’t have to persuade you too hard.} He started to realise he was in love quite early on, which to him was rather scary, but he wasn’t going to let it fuck everything up. He’s still a member of a gang, and no woman was going to change that. Therefore, he intended to hide behind his feelings for as long as he could get away with.

{y/n}: “If this is just a one night stand, why are you still here?”

Baekhyun: “I’m supposed to be protecting you, remember?”

{y/n}: “Not on Sundays, my Dad is home.”

Baekhyun: “It’s Sunday already? Wow… I had no idea.” *Terrible liar*


Oh Sehun

Originally posted by exoturnback

Sehun would have a hard time when he first starts guarding you since you didn’t want to be guarded. You’d argue with him and pick fights when he told you that you couldn’t go on ‘missions’ with him. But even though you drove him crazy, he still managed to fall for you. But that only complicated things. When he fell for you, he found himself caving into your pleads to going out with him to illegal spots and doing dirty work.

Sehun: “You can’t come on this one {y/n}, it’s dangerous.”

{y/n}: “More dangerous than robbing a bank with arms?”

Sehun: “… Not the point, if your Dad finds me I’m dead.”


Zhang Yixing/ Lay

Originally posted by jonginssoo

Lay won’t take any messing around from you. If you try and get out, he isn’t going to take it lightly, or if you try and deceive him, he isn’t going to let you off for it unpunished. At first, the relationship wasn’t much, he was the guard, and you didn’t dare try and get past him. But as the relationship progressed, you became more daring, knowing where Yixing’s boundaries where and which buttons you could push. He started falling for you, but he’s a realistic man, and knows that a relationship with the boss’s daughter is more than forbidden.

{y/n}: “I’ll go right now and tell him how I feel about you-”

Yixing: *Grabs your wrists and pushes you up against a wall* “Not if I make sure you can’t walk to go and tell him”


Kim Jongdae/ Chen

Originally posted by porkdo-bi

Jongdae knows the business of the job is rough, and feels sorry for you that you didn’t have a choice but to be in it. When he’s asked to guard you, he does, mainly because he knows how dangerous the business can be, and he doesn’t was you getting hurt on his conscience. He spends most of his time talking to you while guarding you. Luckily for him, no one really tries to come and find you, so his job is pretty easy. He realises he’s fallen in love when his job is slowly ticking towards it’s end, and he knows that if he doesn’t confess now then he’ll probably never have the chance again.

Jongdae: “I know you’re my boss’s daughter, but I really like you {y/n} and I want to be able to protect you forever…”


Kim Minseok/ Xiumin

Originally posted by minseokked

Like Yixing, Minseok won’t take any messing around. But unlike Yixing, he doesn’t let his feelings change how he works around you. When he starts falling in love, he doesn’t become any more lenient, and certainly doesn’t let it change how he does his job. He’s not going to let you sneak out behind your Dad’s back just because he’s in love with you. He can be a sweetheart, taking care of you, but he can also be very intimidating. When he finds out you feel the same way that he feels for you, he doesn’t know what to do with the information. And even though he plans on making some kind of confession, he makes sure that his guarding job is done beforehand, knowing he can’t let his personal feelings interfere with his work.

{y/n}: “But I want to go and see that guy! He was so hot and-”

Minseok: “If you wanted to see a hot guy {y/n}, all you had to do was ask.” *Raises up his shirt slightly to give you a sneak peak of the toned muscles that lay underneath*


Huang Zitao/ Tao

Originally posted by lil-duckling

Even though Tao is undoubtedly the strongest member due to his martial arts, that doesn’t mean he isn’t going to be a complete ass when it comes to protecting you. He would see guarding you as babysitting, and would probably be very careless at first. That is until you go missing and he freaks out because he knows your Dad will kill him if he finds out. Though Tao doesn’t take long tracking you down, he beats up the people that took you and takes his job more seriously after that. During his time of protecting you, he teaches you some self defense and some basic martial arts so that you can protect yourself. This is when he realises he’s really fallen in love.

Tao: “No, your arm needs to be like this.” *Comes up behind you and holds your hand to put it in the right place. Smiles when he feels his cheeks blush like he’s a teenager all over again.*


Kim Junmyeon/ Suho

Originally posted by baekintime

Even though Junmyeon is very kind, he is also very demanding, and won’t let you do anything that he sees as unsafe. He knows how to handle himself and won’t ‘take messing from a little girl.’ When he starts to fall in love, that’s where his starts to go downhill. He doesn’t know what to say, so he simply continues to try and work, but it’s not the same with the added emotions. He’s still a hard ass, and refuses to let you do anything bad, but he is more lenient and will take you out to certain places as long as they’re safe enough to do so.

{y/n}: “Please? The coffee shop is literally over there, please?”

Junmyeon: “Ugh fine, but this is your only treat.”

{y/n}: “Remember when you said that last night?

Junmyeon: “… Shut up, we don’t talk about that. Especially when your Dad could be around the corner.”


Lu Han

Originally posted by moncide

Luhan accepted the job to guard you, and certainly didn’t regret it. Since he’s so used to the guns and violence, he isn’t easily intimidated, if anything, he’s more intimidating than some of the other members. He’d spend half of his life walking around with a knife in his boot, and can be strict with you when he needs to be. He only lets you out when he’s with you, and does not appreciate other men looking at you. {He will beat up those shits if he notices them looking or make a comment about your hotness.} He realises he’s in love one night while you’re sleeping {he doesn’t sleep much, he doesn’t trust himself to since he can’t ensure your safety}. He was watching your face, how soft and beautiful it was and how peaceful you looked when you slept and that’s when he realised his true feelings

Luhan: *Watches you, realising he’s in love* “Well shit… that’s fucked up.”


Kim Jongin/ Kai

Originally posted by kaibility

Jongin was told to guard you after an incident where you had been captured, so when he finally started his job, he realised how screwed up you really were after the bad experience. He knew how scared you must be, and took that into consideration while guarding you. Unlike the other members, Jongin is a lot more caring, and will treat you more as a person than his ‘job.’ He makes you feel safe in any way possible, even if it means cuddling with you in the bed {though he isn’t exactly complaining about that one.} He doesn’t really remember when he realised he loved you, it just always seemed to be there, and that’s when he silently vowed to himself that he would never let you get hurt.

Jongin: “You’re a precious little petal, aren’t you {y/n}” *Patching you up after you fell over running away from another gang with him.*


Wu Yifan/ Kris

Originally posted by ohyaahkkaebsong

Kris was assigned the job of guarding you after he saved you from a very dangerous gang. The boss had been so impressed that he had given your well being into Kris’s hands and Kris really didn’t know how to feel about that. Half of him was happy, he wasn’t about to complain about having a beautiful girl all to himself, though another part of him was annoyed, he didn’t want to become your ‘babysitter’ as he put it. At first, he didn’t show you much emotion, but when he found out you’d fallen for him, he couldn’t help but fall for you. He realised he was in love with you while watching you do ordinary jobs in the small apartment you were both staying in together as a hide out.

Kris: “She’s so talented”

{y/n}: “Did you say something?”

Kris: “Table! I said table, you’re a table!” *Bad when it comes to complimenting/confessing*

I Never Looked Back - Newt

“He’s dead.” Thomas whispered. I looked at him and laughed.

“That’s a good joke, Thomas, but now’s not the time. Seriously, where’s Newt?” I asked him, hands on my hips. He looked at me solemnly and I scoffed. I looked at the other boys. “Guys, seriously. He’s joking.” They didn’t look so convinced. I looked back at Thomas. “Thomas, tell them you’re joking.” I instructed. He took a deep, shaky breath. “Thomas.”

“I’m sorry.” He murmured. I glared at him and looked at the others. 

“Okay, I don’t know what’s going on here, but that isn’t funny.” I shook my head.

“Y/N-”

“No.” I cut him off. “I am going to look for Newt.” I turned around and began to walk away when Minho grabbed my arm. 

“Newt is dead.” He told me, bluntly. I looked at him, betrayal splattered across my face.

“Really? Minho? You’re in on this? I can’t believe you! Let go of me!” I tried to shake out of his grasp when he grabbed my other arm and looked me dead in the eye. “Minho, let-”

“Newt. Is. Dead.” He told me. I kept trying to escape, tears beginning to build up in my eyes. “Newt is dead. Y/N, Newt is dead. Newt is-”

“He’s not dead!” I screamed, feeling my heart shatter. Tears began to fall down my face. “He’s… he’s not… he… he can’t be.”

“Newt is dead. He’s gone.”

“He-he said-”

“He’s gone.” Minho repeated one last time. I began to shake, trying to stop my sobbing as I put my hand on my heart, as though I was going to claw it out of my chest. I started to sob. My knees began to buckle under me while Minho held me up and hugged me.

“No…” I sobbed. “No…”

“I’m sorry.”

“He’s… he’s…” I pulled away and looked at Thomas. “He’s dead?” I whispered, he nodded.

“I’m so sorry.” Thomas apologised, getting on his knees. “I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

“Wh-what happened? What…” I tried to find the words, but I couldn’t.

“He- I- He…” He took a deep breath. “He asked me to kill him.” I straightened my posture. “And I…”

“Say it.” I asked of him, “Say it, Thomas.”

“I killed him.”

His words echoed in my ears over and over again. Thomas had killed him.

“I loved him.”

“I know.”

“I loved him, and I was scared of rejection and trusting him and do you know how stupid that is?” I asked, starting to laugh. “I… I didn’t even get to tell him!” I sobbed. “And you… my own brother… knowing this, you… you killed him?” I asked. Thomas looked at me, sorrow and guilt filled his eyes. “Oh my god.” I stepped away from him. He stood up and stepped toward me, I stepped back, extending my arm, “Stay away from me.”

“Y/N,”

“No.” I began to walk away.

“Y/N, wait!” Minho called,

“No!” I screamed as my walk turned into a sprint as I run as fast I could away from them.

I never looked back.