Nah I just got a weird headcanon where mads and Laurens meet up and just talk about random shit and their boyfriends. (It’s like a fucking fanfiction, not just a headcanon but oh well. Read at your own risk..)
They can Only do it every Thursday (taking turns to buy each other coffee) because Jef and Ham are always arguing, and James and John are always apologising to each other like “Im sorry Alex punched Thomas in the nose yesterday…” But both are convinced that deep down they really don’t hate each other (and of course they don’t).
Whenever James is going out, he’s like “okay Thomas, I’ll be back in a bit,” and Thomas is really clingy but decides he can’t really stop him and keep him.
When John is going out on the other hand he doesn’t really bother to tell Alex because he’s always busy, instead leaving a note on the counter saying ‘back soon, -jack’ doubts Alex even reads the notes (but he does).
So basically John and James just talk by their usual window seat, and James sometimes complains that Thomas is being really clingy or whatever, but he feels like he doesn’t want it any other way. And then John kinda sighs and briefly mentions how he wished he could spend more time with Alex, but insists it’s fine and shit.
James sometimes teases John, like “what’s it like dating a toddler,” hinting the 'tantrums’ Alex pulls after loosing an argument with Thomas, and John’s like “sometimes I just wish he’d act his age,” and James agrees but feels bad for agreeing so goes on to say “yeah but I love my puppy… (god that sounds like I’m talking about a pet)!”
(Also that there is a lady who was once sitting behind them who caught snippets of their conversation about the toddler and puppy thing, and basically thinks that John’s a pedophile and James is a furry.
Over the weeks, John and Alex’s relationship grows more distant, and James begins to feel like he’s being smothered, and they end up not talking about the good qualities in their boyfriends anymore, but the bad, if they even talk about them at all.
So the last time they meet up, they are barely talking to each other, just drinking their coffees, perking up every little while to say something, but conversations never hold.
Since they are in their window seat as usual, Thomas and Alex are walking by (bickering) and are like “wait is that James/john?” And they both get the weird assumption that they are being cheated on by their enemy’s boyfriend. So they both go in to confront them.
(Alex thinks John is cheating because he’s always working and ignoring him. Thomas thinks James is cheating because he’s too clingy or whatever.) So they go in, and make a whole scene in the small coffee shop (everyone is now watching).
Alex is like “ShiT JAcK I’m SO SORRY,” and Thomas is just like “James….?” (Alex is the reason all eyes are on them.) the person who works there knows that john and James come here every week and that they usually spend hours on end just talking. Even the worker assumed they were going out, and is completely shocked to see their actual boyfriends burst in like this.
James is immediately like “oh god, no Tommy. This isn’t what it looks like!” John is kind of just shocked and speechless as Alex runs over to him and hugs him, apologising repeatedly for everything he can think of.
James is still trying to convince Thomas that him and John are only friends, but Thomas isn’t having it. (+he is unaware of his clinginess towards James.) he’s all like “I’ve really tried to be the best I could for you! And you’re still not happy?!” And James is like “listen to me! There’s nothing going on between me and John!” John is still unable to find words which kind of angers Alex, who ends up joining in on questioning James.
Alex is all like “what proof do you have that there’s nothing between you?!” To which Jemmy replies “what proof do /you/ have that there /is/ something going on?!” And Thomas is nearly crying (betrayed x100). “Well, first of all you meet up in secret- never telling me where you’re going or who you’re meeting and hakbwkxjwnsbwk!!!!” (He’s just really flustered.)
“Alex, (he also greets Thomas, but nervously and quietly) the only reason we didn’t tell you guys was because we know ye don’t get along, so we wouldn’t want to waste your time just because we were hanging out…” and James sighs, S O FUCKING RELIEVED. “And everyone needs that friend that they can just talk to..”
So they spend hours trying to sort it all out. Alex promised to spend more time with John, and Thomas came to terms with James that they both needed a little time to themselves every now and then.
John and James kept hanging out. They stopped going to the coffee shop the worker though it would be best if their boyfriends and them stayed away from it for a while. (Basically got banned.) John introduced James to his other friends (Laf and Herc, and Burr was already close-ish with both parties) and Thomas and Alex decided they could put their differences aside at least twice a week (finding they also had a lot in common).
So basically the ending is shit. But oh well. The headcanon where John and James went out to get coffee every Thursday and just talk, sometimes about recent event, mostly about their boyfriends, turned into this fucking shit. Should I be proud? No.
they’ll get bickering and all up in each others’ faces and it hits them at the same time how Gay they are
“No way, dude.”
“Uh, yeah way.”
“REALLY REALLY” and then they just. start making out
“every time you call me “mullet” you have to kiss me.”
“fine. but every time you don’t address me either as “the tailor” or “sharpshooter” you have to kiss me.
“guess we better have a practice run just to make sure we’re clear on the rules then, huh lance?”
“looks like it, mullet.”
they’re piloting their little fighter drones and lance’ll elbow keith when he one-ups him, and keith’ll shove him back and lance will giggle and be like “stop” and poke keith in the ribs and keith laughs “I’m not doing anything!!” and before long they’re just a tangled puddle
allura: “boys! we are underattack!”
lance: “I knOW keith is attacking me please hELP”
the only thing that can keep them from bickering with each other is when they team up on someone else.
one of the blade of mimosa ppl offhandedly mentions that their fighting is sloppy and keith and lance devour him
“uh? Excuse You? did you see keith’s moves out there?”
“were you even watching the same battle? lance did great.”
“he freaking destroyed those guys and if you think he didn’t then you gotta answer to me”
“yeah and I’d like to see you pilot a 10,000 yr old warship, buddy”
“so just, turn around? and never insult my bf again”
“the door’s right over there. away from lance.”
the dude just backs away slowly, then turns and runs from the sheer burning force of their gay power
This isn't a hc but...favorite funny moments from voltron? It would make my day :)
oo heck yah:
pidge: lance watch out we’re gonna crash
lance: man don’t worry, in my first year of flight school you know what they called me? they called me the tailor because of how i thread the needle
lance: [immediately crashes the ship]
this photo of everyone’s reactions to lance shamelessly letting one rip:
lance saying the space equivalent of shut your fuck
hunk trying to form voltron by barreling into Keith’s lion and yelling COMBINE
honestly one of my favorite scenes that made me laugh is when hunk tries to be the head. because when they first formed voltron he yelled with the utmost sincerity “I’M A LEG” and then when you look at that scene……they all just sat there in their lions all stacked and waited while hunk flew to the top and sat on everyone and no one said ANYTHING fkgkwekflj and hunk’s just like……what do you mean i can’t be the head?
Shiro in 100% seriousness trying to form voltron by stacking up like a cheerleader pyramid and in pure sincere concentration: “I’ll form the head”
Coran trying to time the team’s response to the emergency drill using a meat thermometer
this entire exchange:
when they go to the arusian village and
THEY’RE ALREADY ABOUT TO SACRIFICE THIS DUDE AND THE DUDE IS JUST LIKE :|
Pidge: also, I sweat a lot. I mean in general. Unrelated to the peanuts.
Coran literally breaking his spine trying to lift the Balmera crystal
[sarcastic Keith voice] Winning what? The intergalactic time-measuring competition?
Coran attempting to spoonfeed Shiro like a baby
Keith honestly considering the most important event during the sendak incident to be him cradling Lance in his arms, so much so that his voice cracks in the way angsty teen voices do when they’re whining
Keith getting revenge on Lance for not remembering their bonding moment by pretending he couldn’t hear Lance over the comms. that was honestly rlly cute
[Lance voice] nana nana boo boo!!!
[hunk imitating allura]: oh LONCE he looks so fine im all atwitter
[matt voice] Don’t lie. I know you love those peas dad