A fic where Jamie beats the ever loving snot out of Frank, and when Claire gets all squeally and upset, he turns on her and tells her to shut it, because he’s had it with all the Frank, and dudebro can just man up and go sit in his grave, silent FOR ONCE, and I’m the DAMN LAIRD OF LALLYBROCH AND I’M NOT HEARING ANYMORE OF YOUR DRIVEL. And Claire’s like, My bad, you’re right. I’m so over him. Go find your own nurse, Frank, I’m with Muscles McScot now and I don’t care about your widdle boo boos. And they all lived happily ever after, except Frank, because THIS STORY ISN’T ABOUT YOU AND WE DONT CARE!!

The end

But Tobias is adorable, and he’s wearing a corset, so he wins.