maze of the phantom

Please please please I know I’m not very good at drawing and that I don’t have time right now but I wanna improve and I promise I will do it some day please please please.

Chapter 4 of It's Not Paranoia If You're Right

Mementos.

The strange, labyrinthine Palace was where he found most of his targets. From what conversations Goro had overheard in Sae’s Palace, it was clear that the Phantom Thieves were under the impression that only sufficiently ‘evil’ people would show up in its depths.

Hilarious.

You could find almost anyone within Mementos, the exceptions being those with Palaces of their own. It was just a matter of knowing where to look.

Crow had always wondered how the Phantom Thieves managed to explore its maze-like interior with such a large group. The answer, apparently, was by driving a car. That was also Morgana, the talking cat-mascot-thing.

He really needed to figure out what that thing was.

“Ready for your first trip into Mementos?” Joker asked.

Crow flashed a smile. “Of course.”

Skull reached out and patted him on the back a little too roughly. “That’s the spirit! Now let’s get goin’! I’m ready to bust loose!”

“Does nobody see the problem here?” Mona asked.

“Uh, what problem?”

Despite being a car, Mona managed to give off the air of rolling his eyes. “I can only fit seven people. And there are eight of you!”


There was a moment as they digested this information.

“Looks like someone’s gotta stay behi~ind!” Oracle said.

“That would be far too risky.” Queen interjected. “What if we need that person to switch out with an active fighter?”

“Queen’s got a point.” Joker said. “And besides, I’d feel bad about leaving someone behind.”

“But…that would mean that one of us would have to sit on someone else’s lap…” Panther said.

“I would not mind if someone wished to sit on my lap.” Fox said, completely missing the implications.

“Dude.”

“…?”

Crow rolled his eyes behind his mask. It truly was a miracle that the Phantom Thieves had made it this far. He glanced over at Joker to see how he was reacting to this nonsense. To his surprise, Joker actually looked thoughtful. And…was that a smirk he saw?

Joker looked up at him.

Oh.

Oh no.

He wouldn’t.

Joker cleared his throat. “Actually, I think I have an idea.”

He would.

“Let’s have Crow sit on my lap.”

“Huh?”

“Dude, what?”

“Is - is that a good idea?”

Panther sighed and muttered something about thirst.

Crow laughed, nervously. “You can’t be serious…”

Joker shrugged. “Of course, you can back out if you want.”

Crow bristled. Excuse me? Does he think I’m the type to back down from a challenge? Because that’s what this was now - a challenge.

Besides, if he played along, he would be seen as a good sport. The other thieves would trust him more. Probably. And of course, someone willing to sit on Joker’s lap would hardly be planning to kill him, right?

…Right?

“Oh, no. That’s not what I meant. Of course, I’d be happy to go along with your idea.” Aaaand smile. Ha. Take that.

The others were giving him strangely speculative looks, but he ignored them. . He watched Joker’s face, looking for a reaction or, indeed, proof that he was capable of expressing anything other than stoic calmness or quiet amusement. He found none.

“But Joker, ” Fox interjected, “If Crow is to sit on your lap, then how will you drive?”

“I’ll drive.” Queen said. “I’ve done it before.”

Fox suddenly looked rather queasy, as did Skull and Panther. Strange.

“It’s settled then.” Joker smirked at Crow. Crow smiled back.

Asshole.

—-

The car was strangely warm.

Maybe it was just him. Maybe it was because there were 8 teens packed into a car with mediocre air conditioning. Maybe it was because he was sitting in the lap of Akira fucking Kurusu, trying his very best not to blush.

For the fifth time in as many minutes, Crow asked himself why he’d agreed to this.

The car swerved, and Joker wrapped an arm around Crow’s waist to prevent him from falling onto Noir. Then he jerked his arm away like he’d just touched boiling water. Crow tried not to look anyone in the eye.

He could’ve cried in relief when a shadow wandered into their view, only for it to run off whimpering in fear. Dammit. He shifted in his seat. Why were Joker’s knees so pointy? And just where was their damned target? He desperately needed to beat something up right now.

“Uh, Crow?” Joker’s voice was uncharacteristically strained. “Could you maybe not move so much?”

Huh. That was a strange thing to—

Oh.

Oh.

No. Nonononononono. Fuck this. Fuck. This. Fucking Phantom Thief and his stupid fucking ideas—

“Crow?” Joker asked, when he hadn’t answered.

“Yes! Yeah, I won’t, uh, I won’t move.”

Behind them, Oracle giggled. Crow turned red.

When they finally did get to the target’s shadow, both he and Joker seemed to fight more viciously than usual. Crow found it was extremely therapeutic to stab shadows with a sword. Over and over and over and over and over.

Crow spent the whole trip back doing his best impression of a statue.

—-

“So….” Panther looked between him and Joker. “How was it?”

“……Interesting.” Joker said, voice muffled. For some reason, he was covering the lower half of his face. Like he was hiding something. It could’ve been a blush.

But while Joker could easily get away with a vague, one-worded answer, Crow couldn’t. Panther looked at him expectantly, and he cleared his throat.

“It was…..an experience.” Didn’t mean he had to elaborate on what that meant.

“Whaaaat? C’mon Crowsy, gimme some details.” Oracle bounced over and jabbed him with her elbow.

“I’d rather not.”

Whatever she had been about to saw was cut off by the sound of Joker clearing his throat. “Let’s end it here today, everyone.” He turned towards the wall and pulled out his phone.

Once they were safely back in the real world, Goro made to leave as soon as possible. “I have work. I’ll see you all later.” He power walked away without waiting for a response.

Let’s hope I never have to do that again.

—-


The group chat WITHOUT A-sketchi-kechi

FS: we all saw it akira u were totes blushin ;)
AK: I felt something in my throat and didnt want to cough on anyone
FS: suuuure ;) keep makin excuses ;) i kno the truth ;)
RS: so y did u ask him to sit on yr lap
RS: like srsly dude
YK: Yes, what was the reasoning for that?
YK: And Futaba, what does ;) mean?
FS: oh inari
AT: i mean, telling him you were into getting murdered was weird enough
AT: you have some serious thirst akira
MN: …..Excuse me?
MN: You told Akechi….you were ‘into’ getting murdered?
AT: well technically he said “i always thought it’d be hot to be murdered”
AT: something like that
HO: Akira, is there something you’d like to tell us?
AK: NO
AK: IM NOT INTO THAT
AK: I JUST WANTED TO TESE HIM OKAY
AK: TEASE
MN: Akira.
MN: You cannot keep alluding to the fact that he is going to kill you.
MN: It could compromise our plan.
AK: sorry
MN: And no more teasing him.
FS: but makoto did u see akechis face
FS: he was blushin too
FS: and every1 heard him say ‘Yes!’ out of nowhere
FS: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
YK: Ah, now that one I understand.
YK: It is a face.
RS: akira wtf did u do to him
HO: It was nothing like what you’re suggesting, Futaba!
HO: Akira simply asked Akechi to stop moving so much.
HO: Akechi didn’t answer for a while, so Akira prompted him again.
HO: Akechi was likely startled, which is why he responded so loudly.
AT: so akira told akechi to stop moving around on his lap
AT: that doesnt sound suspicious at all
RS: DUDE
FS: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
AK: byeihavetogo
Akira Kurusu has left the chat.
FS: muhehehehe

Thomas Brodie-Sangster saying “fucking” in Phantom Halo is my religion.

“we don’t even have groceries, yo-you bought a fucking Bentley.”

play that shit at my wedding, my funeral, put it on my headstone, make it my ringtone, tattoo it to my fucking forehead. I can’t get over it gtg

  • Friend: hey you know Thomas Sangster?
  • Me: you mean the sexy angelic hottie sent from paradise with fabulicious hair and british accent and love to lick his lips and cute eyes and dazzling arms who kills every time he speaks?
  • Friend: umm..yeah?
  • Me: the hella smoking cinnamon roll cutie pie who dies a painful death in every sexy role he acts?
  • Friend:
  • Friend:
  • Friend:
  • Me: i knOW hiM

Christmas Book Haul!! Books I bought with Christmas $ or I received for Christmas.

My Problems With The Maze Runner Movie
  1. They added too many useless new characters.
  2. The movie was all action, where the book was more about clever puns and educational metaphors.
  3. They changed the main character’s name from Milo to Thomas.
  4. The title change was also unnecessary.
  5. They completely left out the Humbug, the Doldrums and King Azaz.
  6. The focus on a bunch of trapped boys was nowhere near as exciting as the book’s original focus on the world through the tollbooth.
  7. They cut out the opening with the tollbooth completely so you have no clue how the main character ended up there.
  8. I went to this movie just to see the scene where Milo talks to the Dodecahedron and they cut that in favor of a chase with “Grievers” which weren’t even in the original book.
  9. No credit was given to Norton Juster at all, he only WROTE THE NOVEL.
  10. It took place in a maze, which was superfluous and not in the book.
  11. Added “Teresa” when the original novel had no girls. I’m all for more even representation but not when you have to change massive plot elements to justify it for its own sake. And what’s with this apocalyptic crap surrounding her?
  12. The ending of the movie is so different from the end of the book it’s absurd. No Rhyme or Reason, just set up for more movies. The book stood alone and that’s how the movie should’ve been.
  13. They changed the scene where he directs a sunrise to a scene where a bunch of maps get burnt. Pointless.
  14. They changed the Mathemagician to another kid.
  15. Opening company titles. The book didn’t have any stupid “20th Century Fox” crap at the beginning.

1/5 Stars, read the book or see the old 70s cartoon instead.

Top Ten Ships Questions

Pick Your Top Ten Ships and without looking answer the questions

Hijacked this from another blog and decided it looked fun. (Note: my favorite ships are not written in any particular order. It was just whoever came to mind first)

1. Klance (Keith/Lance, Voltron Legendary Defender) 

2. Victuurio (Viktor, Yuuri & Yurio; Yuri!!! On Ice)

3. Shukita (Yusuke/Akira; Persona 5)

4. Thominewt (Thomas, Newt & Minho; Maze Runner)

5. Jercy (Percy/Jason; Heroes of Olympus)

6. Phantom Hearts (Sora/Danny; it’s a crack ship, shhh)

7. Strifehart (Cloud/Squall; Final Fantasy 7/8 & Kingdom Hearts)

8. KeiKou (Kei/Kou; Ajin)

9. Bakugo/Midoriya (Boku no Hero Academia)

10. Alois/Ciel (Black Butler/Kuroshitsuji)


1.    Do you remember the episode/scene/chapter that you first started shipping 6? 

It was a joke. In high school, I was in the process of writing a really fun adventure story for my friends and I ended up shipping them in story as a joke. Turns out, their chemistry was too strong so my friends and I started shipping them since.

2.    Have you ever read a FanFiction about 2?

One or two. They’re terrible though. Not a lot of people understand how to write a healthy poly ship without smothering it in porn or unnecessary drama. I’ve been tempted to write my own but I worry I won’t portray the characters correctly.

3.    Has a picture of 4 ever been your screen saver/profile picture/tumblravatar?

HELL FUCKING YEAH FOR LIKE TWO YEARS

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