maybe-this-is-why-people-find-me-weird

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People may think that I’m hard to be with. Maybe because I don’t socialize that much and when I do, it’s always with a few people. I’m not snob. I’m not anti-people. I’m not just comfortable being in a large group. I don’t know how to converse or how to even get along. I always think that I’m boring and people may think I’m weird and corny. I don’t know. I really find it hard. That’s why you might see me alone all the time. I usually preferred being away from everybody because in that case, I don’t have to try hard and won’t be pressured to talk with the people surrounding me. Being alone frees me from these anxieties. I just hope that people will get to understand that everyone is not good at conversing with other people. There will always be fear of judgement and rejection.

it’s strange to think that there’s so many things about me that people just don’t know. and not because I don’t tell them but more because it’s just never come up in conversation. so many memories and experiences and flaws and insecurities that no one knows, that are all kept to myself. I don’t know why I find that weird, but I do. maybe because I know that everyone else is like that, that there are so many things about everyone around me that I don’t and might never know. I believe that experiences and choices and memories make up who a person is, and it makes me wonder how well I really know anyone around me. I don’t know where this is going but pretty much I’m just very confused at life and how I seem to not know anyone at all

anonymous asked:

ok maybe i'm reading into it too much but philip said he Doesn't swim, not that he Can't swim. i'm feeling that maybe he does know how to swim but something traumatic happened to him and he doesn't like anymore. idk it just seems like a weird way to word it why not just say "i can't swim". anyways i'm sure we'll find out soon bc i feel like they wouldn't have mentioned it if it wasn't important

yeah me too. i think he’ll have to swim later on maybe bc of something with lukas?? (cuz of james’ wet hair on set?) and yah i think maybe something might’ve happened, or it’s just that he can’t in general. i’ve seen people talking about him coming from the city so it would make sense for him to not know how to swim, but i feel like it’ll be a little bit more tragic than that???

anonymous asked:

after hearing niall saying he hasn't been in mullingar since last year made me really sad,you know I also find weird the fact he didn't spent his birthday with his family sometimes I think that as much as he loves ireland maybe he feels like he doesn't fit there anymore thats why he rarely come back and he has always people around I think deep down he feels really alone sometimes

i think he treats his friends like his family. (also he has his devine leeches around all the time and they are his cousins). but i can totally understand that because i do that too. i have a weird relationship with my family so my friends are it for me. and yea i can totally see niall thinking that he doesnt fit with his fam in ireland and it makes me so sad:(