maybe there will be alcohol

DOCTOR DREAMY | PT.1

pt1 | pt2 | (1/?)

pairing: jimin x reader

genre: fluff, slight angst, eventual smut + expecting parents au

word Count: 4,724

request: sperm donor ex-boyfriend jimin 

↠ description: Okay, maybe in hindsight asking your ex-boyfriend, who you never really got over, to be your sperm-donor wasn’t the brightest of ideas.

cr.


“I want to have your baby,” is a particular string of words that is only considered acceptable in a certain number of situations.

Maybe between two lovers getting lost in the moment of their heightened feelings, and somehow the words just slip — that’s probably the most common occurrence of the phrase. Or maybe it’s a night out, alcohol in your system, and the words just sort of spill past your lips to the most ridiculously attractive stranger you’ve ever seen before you can even think to stop them. Even that, can still be considered at least borderline passable usage of the phrase. Hell, even the instance of a teenage girl proclaiming her love for her favorite celebrity with the heavy proclamation is still considered normal for the most part.

These, along with a few far-fetched others, were the only situations you could think of that allowed for the usage of those six words to be passable, yet, here you were, uttering that exact phrase, when you were in absolutely none of them. You weren’t getting caught up in the moment with lust-glazed eyes, you weren’t drunk and spewing nonsense at a bar to some guy, and you most certainly weren’t some star struck teenage girl staring up at her celebrity crush’s poster.

No, you were none of those things.

Instead, you were sitting across from your ex-boyfriend telling him that you wanted to have his baby… Yeah, totally passable usage of the phrase, right?

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The most expensive way ever to get the police involved.

My wife and I had a first floor condo in what had previously been a nice complex. Unfortunately, over time the couple who lived above us (hereafter designated AA for Angry Alcoholic and AAG for Angry, Alcoholic Girlfriend) began drinking heavily, or maybe they just got louder about their drinking. Nearly every night became a massive screaming match between them. They’d stay up until 2 AM shouting at each other at the top of their lungs, then one of them would put on music at top volume to drown out the other. Their taste in music wasn’t actually bad but when it’s 2 AM and my floor is vibrating, it’s a problem. Sometimes they’d even take their fight out into the parking lot, just to be sure all the neighbors were treated to a detailed explanation of who had cheated on who recently (both), and who was threatening to dump who and leave right now. (Neither of them ever actually left, they just went out to their car and threatened to, loudly.)

Then in the mornings he would “work on” his car in the car in the carport right outside our front door. As far as I can tell the all he did was sit there and rev the engine for (it seemed) hours on end. I have no idea when he slept, maybe while we were at work? We and other neighbors complained to the condo board, who issued a warning, which AA and AAG ignored. Eventually the condo board started fining them, but AA found a genius solution- just don’t pay the fine. All the condo board could do was, eventually, put a lien on AA’s condo, but that would only become a problem for him when he sold the place. Apparently, they couldn’t actually foreclose on him, or maybe they just didn’t want to go to the trouble.

Trying to talk to him directly was useless- if we managed to catch him during a rare moment of sobriety, he’d just kind of blow us off, but if we caught him while he was drunk, he’d get pretty threatening and was then even louder for a few days.

We even tried calling the police, but they weren’t really interested unless he actually crossed the line into a felony. They gave him a few warnings, which he also ignored. Maybe if he’d actually beaten me or one of my other neighbors up, they’d have done something, but none of us felt like getting into a fight to find out. Plus there was always the risk that the cops would arrest everybody involved in the fight on general principles, and none of us wanted an arrest record.

Eventually, my wife and I decided to sell our condo and move, for multiple reasons that definitely included AA and AAG. Because of the timing of our move, our realtor wound up actually showing the condo while we were home a couple of times, and we discovered that one of the potential buyers was a city police officer, her husband, and their 1-year old baby. (I guess their old place was too small now that they had a kid.)

Unfortunately, their offer was $3,500 below the top offer. After talking it over, we told our realtor to accept their offer anyway, and we’d just eat the loss. So AA and AAG had a cop move in directly below them.

I’m Facebook friends with a couple of our old neighbors, and in the six months since we moved, AA has been arrested multiple times, and had his car impounded at least once. Apparently he’s now trying to be quieter, but that only lasts until he gets drunk and then he’s screaming again, and his new downstairs neighbor has long ago had enough of his shit, and does not appreciate it if he wakes up her kid. And I guess she also doesn’t appreciate it if he shouts at her. He’s in an “obnoxious neighbor” war with a cop, and he’s losing badly. Hopefully soon he’ll wind up in jail for longer than a couple of days.

one day at the musain

jehan asks all the amis about their favourite greek myth, and everyone just there putting their little two cents in with their why’s and how’s and what that particular myth has taught them etc
and then its grantaire’s turn and he’s like “icarus.” and then he’s silent for a beat, letting everyone wonder why it could be icarus (something about him regularly putting himself in danger??? alcohol, maybe?)
and then he sighs, longingly looks at enjolras who is concentrating on a book a few tables away, and says “because I, too, want to fuck the sun”

(enjolras looks up at the uproar of laughter that follows, looking mildly distraught, because he might not be very good at science but this seems to him like quite the alarming statement)

The Five Times You Encounter Dean Winchester

Word Count: 2,914

Warnings: Drinking. 

A/N: I missed writing Dean, so this happened :) Hope y’all enjoy! Let me know ^^ 

Originally posted by out-in-the-open


Five Years Old
There is a new kid in your kindergarten class. He’s quiet, has freckles all about his tiny face, and wide green eyes. He stands next to the teacher as she introduces him to everyone and you smile widely when you realize that the only open seat in the classroom is the one next to you.

A new friend and you’re thrumming with excitement as he takes his seat next to you.

“Dean!” you exclaim, making him jump.

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anonymous asked:

Hey so you prob have v v many prompts but like I would love to suggest one.. Okay so, Dan is a very confident slutty pastel teenager and Phil is a badass punk boy that everyone fawns over.. and they absolutely hate each other but one thing leads to another and they end up at the same party where Phil is dared to fuck Dan in front of everyone.. (LOTS OF DEGRATION, and dom Phil and sub dan)

a 👌 classic 👌👌

*small mention of rape*

dirty talk + degrading + lots of language idk it’s one am

-

“You look like a slut.” PJ handed Dan a drink, leaning against the counter next to him, raising his eyebrows.

“Thanks, that was the point.” Dan winked, hiking up his already far too short baby blue shorts. PJ rolled his eyes.

“You’re gonna get raped.”

“Um, excuse me, I can take care of myself.” Dan took a sip from the red plastic cup, frowning. “I haven’t gotten raped yet, have I?”

PJ shook his head, staring at Dan like he didn’t understand him one bit. “I just don’t get why you want to look like you strip for truckers.”

Dan pursed his lips, shifting his pink sweater so it hung on him perfectly, showing just the right amount of collarbone. He smirked.

“That’s probably because you’re a virgin, honey.”

PJ pretended to flinch, shaking his head. “Ouch. That was harsh.”

Dan just shrugged, licking his lips.

“Hey Dan,” PJ started, his eyes lighting up as he stared at something across the room. “Your boyfriend’s here.”

“Shit,” Dan groaned, not even having to look, but he did anyways.

Phil Lester had just entered the room, fully clad in black and far too many zippers.

He was wearing a black leather jacket and t shirt, his jeans the same shade, what a surprise. On his feet were large motorcycle boots. Dan scowled.

He had about five people practically hanging off his arms, Dan hated him.

“He thinks he’s so hot,” Dan grumbled, glaring at his cup. “He thinks he can get anyone he fucking wants, what a twat.”

“Aw,” PJ grinned. “Dan’s got a crush.”

“Fuck you,” Dan growled, punching him on the arm, hard. “I’m as close to having a crush on him as I am to fucking him.”

“Dan, you’re literally the sluttiest person I have ever met.”

Dan rolled his eyes. “I’ll fuck almost anyone BUT him.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. Positive.”

~~~

Dan raised his eyebrows, amused. “No. You’re drunk.”

“C'mon Dan,” his friend Chris whined, tugging at his sleeve. “It’ll be fun!”

“No, it won’t.” Dan pulled his hand away. “It’ll be a lot of drunk guys daring me to jerk them. I’m not playing.”

Chris sighed, crossing his arms. “Dan, I hate to do this, but if you don’t come I’ll tell everyone that you hooked up with Mr. Parker over the summer.”

Dan’s eyes widened, and he glared at him. “You wouldn’t.”

“I would.” Chris smirked. Dan scowled at his friend.

“Fine. Fuck you, fine. Let’s get this over with.”

The game of truth or dare was happening in one of the bedrooms; Dan was fairly certain it belonged to the kid’s parents. It consisted of a bunch of drunk sweaty teens that had formed a circle, passing around risky orders and questions in excited whispers.

Dan sat down between Chris and PJ, running his fingers through his hair. He shot a glare at Phil across the circle, who was staring at him.

The first ten minutes were normal. The other kids basically ignored Dan, focusing on one person after another. They seemed to change their focus often; singling out one poor soul after another. Soon the focus was on Phil.

“If you had to fuck anyone in this group, who would it be?” Some guy asked Phil, and Dan looked up, for some reason interested to hear the answer.

Phil smirked, glancing around at everyone before his eyes landed on Dan. He laughed.

“Probably not him,” he said, grinning cockily. “I wouldn’t want to catch anything.”

Dan felt a pang shoot through his chest, and he crossed his arms.

“Fuck you, Lester. At least I don’t have to wear animal skin to look bad ass,” he shot back. Phil glared at him.

The rest of the group fell fairly silent, and Dan was highly aware of everyone’s eyes on them. Finally Chris spoke.

“Okay but, you guys should fuck.”

There was some mutual agreement, and Dan’s eyes widened.

“What? Why!”

“Yeah, no, for once I agree with you. Hell no.” Phil shook his head, looking shocked.

“With a few more drinks, you two will be all over each other.” A boy, Dan thought he remembered his name was Charlie and that he was the kid this house belonged to, said, taking a swig of his beer. There was some nodding from the other people.

“That’s not true,” Dan mumbled, crossing his arms.

“Alright, is no one going to say it?” Chris glanced around the circle. “Fine, I will. I dare you two to kiss.”

“Fuck no,” Dan said immediately, before Phil could even respond. “I’m not doing that.”

“Dan, don’t be a pussy,” Phil growled in a voice Dan was fairly certain he had never heard from him before. “It’s a dare.”

“You’re seriously agreeing to this?” Dan scoffed. Phil shrugged.

“Well, I’m not scared of a little dare.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Dan mumbled, sighing and moving closer to him, on his knees. “Fine. Let’s get this over with.”

Phil smirked, leaning forward and pulling Dan forward by his shirt so he was practically sitting in his lap. Dan hardly had time to react, let alone speak, before Phil was pressing their lips together. Dan just let it happen; it only lasted a second before Phil was pulling back and it was over.

“No no no,” Chris said, grinning. “That doesn’t count. You have to really kiss, for at least ten seconds.”

“Seriously?” Dan asked, and his friend just shrugged. Phil mumbled something under his breath, tangling his fingers in Dan’s hair and tugging him back roughly.

This time Phil kissed him open mouthed, their lips clashing and sliding together. Dan was highly aware of Phil’s tongue invading his mouth, and he fought back with his own.

Dan wrapped his arms around Phil’s neck, kissing him deeper and clutching at his shirt, so lost in the feeling that he didn’t hear Chris shouting that their time was up.

Finally Dan pulled back, mostly because he needed to breathe, and frowned when he realized everyone was staring at him. Including Phil.

Everyone was quiet, mostly in shock, until a boy in the back spoke up.

“I dare you to ride him,” he said, grinning drunkly.

Dan and Phil made eye contact, and Phil smirked.

“Well?” He asked cockily.

“You’re really putting this up to me?”

Phil nodded slowly, licking his lips and tangling his fingers in Dan’s hair, tugging his head back roughly. “Well, Dan? Are you too scared?”

“I’m not scared,” Dan breathed, frowning at him.

“Well then prove it, pretty boy.”

Dan gasped as Phil bit down on his neck, sucking thoroughly on a spot under his ear. It felt completely wrong to have the guy he absolutely despised leaving marks on his neck, but kind of fucking sexy in a way. Or maybe that was the alcohol talking.

Dan felt himself tense up as Phil slid his hand down his stomach, brushing the hem of his shorts.

“Couldn’t we use a different room or something?” Dan asked, grabbing Phil’s wrists instinctively.

“No,” said the boy from before, quickly. “We won’t have any proof you did it.”

“You thirsty fucker,” Dan hissed at him as Phil played with his zipper.

Phil hummed against his neck as he pushed down his shorts, and Dan let him. None of them would remember this in the morning, and most of them had seen Dan naked anyways.

“I bet you love this,” he whispered, biting down on Dan’s ear, scratching his nails down Dan’s thighs. “You’re such a fucking slut, I bet you love being exposed like this.”

“Says the guy who’s erection is digging into my back,” Dan shot back, and Phil shrugged.

“So? I’m turned on. At least I admit it.”

Dan jumped slightly as Phil brushed over his bulge, and Phil chuckled.

“I hate you,” Dan breathed as Phil palmed him, drawing a whine from Dan’s mouth.

“Mmh, doesn’t sound that way.”

Dan felt Phil messing with his own jeans, pushing them down his hips.

“Do you know how many people would love to be in your place right now, you ungrateful slut?”

Dan smirked. “Yeah, just about every thirteen year old girl in our school.”

Phil pulled Dan’s hair roughly, exposing his throat, and Dan couldn’t help letting a whimper escape him.

“You don’t get to speak to me that way,” he growled, and Dan could feel his hard on grinding against his ass. “Understand?”

Dan couldn’t help but moan, grinding back on Phil’s lap. “Yes sir,” he gasped.

Phil put his fingers to Dan’s mouth, and Dan took them obediently. He carefully covered them with spit before Phil pulled them out.

“I figure you don’t need stretching,” Phil muttered, smirking meanly. Dan just nodded, unable to think of a snarky comeback in that exact moment.

Dan felt Phil lining up, and then gripping his waist.

“Push back,” he breathed, pulling Dan back on his lap slightly. Dan moaned, pushing back on Phil’s cock completely.

He grinded back slowly, his eyes closed and whorish moans falling from his mouth nonstop.

“That’s it, baby, moan like a dirty fucking slut for me,” Phil groaned, biting down on Dan’s neck. “Such a good fucktoy, that’s it.”

Dan whined, letting out little gasps and “ah ah ah”’s as he bounced and grinded expertly, fucking himself on Phil’s dick. They seemed to have both forgotten anyone else was in the room, except for a faint prickle on Dan’s neck, the feeling of being watched, which was honestly turning him on even more.

Phil grabbed Dan’s wrists, pinning them behind his back and thrusting up into him roughly.

“Think you can cum without me touching you?” He asked huskily. “Because, that would be really fucking hot.”

Dan nodded almost immediately, speeding up his movements with a loud whimper.

“Fuck, daddy,” he gasped, and Phil practically growled.

“What a pretty toy, acting like such a slut for me, in front of all these people,” he whispered, meeting Dan’s hips with his own. “Everyone’s watching you, Dan, watching you call me daddy and fuck yourself on my cock. I bet you fucking love it, don’t you?”

“Yes,” Dan whimpered. “Yes, daddy, god yes, l-love it.”

“Good boy.” Phil pulled Dan’s head back on his shoulder. “Now cum for me, princess.”

Dan let go with a loud continuous feminine moan, his hips twitching as he thrust forward automatically. Phil groaned, burying his face in Dan’s neck as he let go inside of him.

Dan slumped onto the carpet, completely fucked out, his eyes still closed.

“Jesus,” he breathed.

Phil was suddenly very aware of all of the people staring at them, and laughed.

“Hey, Charlie, I can use your shower right?”

The boy nodded slowly, still shocked into silence.

“Cool.” Phil grinned, scooping Dan up bridal style in one motion and standing carefully. “Uh, if you hear noises from the bathroom, you probably have rats and it’s totally not a second round.”

Resident Evil officially turns 21 today. They are now legal to drink.

Drink up guys, you all deserve it after all the shit you went through for all these years.

Happy 21 years of Resident Evil everyone!

Okay so @chirpingisflirting said she’s been having a real poopy bday, so I thought I’d take a crack at a nurseydex hc (which became this lame ficlet chimera) for her! Here goes nothing! Literally!

I’d imagine that, early in Nursey and Dex’s relationship (say, four months in?), school starts hittin’ Dex hard; boy’s got assignments up the wazoo, some emergency fees come up and he takes a small job a few days a week at the school bookstore/convenience store, his life’s just a mess. Nursey’s trying to keep his cool and be understanding, but it’s driving him nuts. He hasn’t seen Dex outside of practice in like, a month and a half, and he keeps trying to text him and make the best out of a crappy situation, but Dex tends to fall asleep or get bogged down by a new assignment and just forgets to text back and or it’s been almost a day and it’d feel really awkward to answer now and… yeah. It’s really fucking with Nursey.

He’s been taking it slow with Dex (whom I headcanon as only recently really coming into his sexuality?) since the start, but it feels like he’s the only one who gives a crap sometimes. Nursey reminds himself that’s obviously not true, though, and that Dex is just obscenely busy and just… lays on the supportive texts, or brings extra snacks for Dex after practice/before class. Still, this can only go on for so long.

And it’s driving Dex crazy too, because he’s reading all the texts, and he can see how upset Nursey is every time he splits up with the rest of the team after breakfast to head off to class, and it weighs on his mind when he’s knee-deep in some cs problem. It’s his first real relationship (with a dude?), and he’s crazy for Nursey, but he feels like he’s only giving 30% when Nursey’s constantly giving 100% (which ISN’T TRUE; boy’s running himself ragged, here!).

So he works double time for like a week to give him enough slack to slack off for an evening. It’s Tuesday, and he texts Nursey around lunch to get dressed in something comfy and wait outside the Haus for him after dinner. Nursey’s totally confused and is so… idk? Anxious? What could Dex want to talk about? Can Nursey even take this anymore? Is this fair to him? He almost doesn’t reply or want to show up, but he’s a sucker for Dex, so he puts on a cute li'l sweater over a collared shirt and waits out front.

Dex pulls up ten minutes late (definitely unlike him), and Nursey and him drive off silently.

They pull up to this hill hidden between these real posh houses that overlook Samwell and the surrounding town, minutes pass, and Dex pulls a scrap of paper and a single, haggard looking rose from behind his seat, but he still won’t talk. He just stares down at the things in his hands, and Nursey’s somewhere between concerned and pissed.

“I stopped by the flower shop before they closed and picked this up for you,” Dex starts, hands on the rose he’s now jerking in Nursey’s direction, “but I realized I don’t even know if you like roses, and this is completely fucking cliché, and it got all fucked up because I kept fiddling with it, and- Jesus, Nurse. I’m sorry.”

Nursey just looks up and locks eyes with Dex for the first time all night. Concern is winning out over anger now. He takes the rose, and his eyebrows wrinkle in an almost sad way.

“Shit, Nur- Derek! Derek. Are you okay? I’m so, so–”

“I love it.” Nursey places his hand over Dex’s. Dex just blushes and goes silent again, his eyes returning to the scrap that’s getting closer to becoming, well, scraps.

“I know I’ve been really shitty about, well, us, recently.” Dex is breathing deeper now. “But I know how hard this is for you, and I think about you all the time, and I thought I could balance everything, but I-” Dex shrugs. “I guess I can’t,” he chuckles.

“And I guess I know how much you like poetry and stuff, and- just- I brought you here to tell you…” He stretches out the paper in his now shaking hands, and sucks in a sharp breath. Th- this. Just read this.“ He passes the scrap over to Nursey:

‘You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won’t tell you that he loves you, but he loves you. And you feel like you’ve done something terrible, like robbed a liquor store, or swallowed pills, or shoveled yourself a grave in the dirt, and you’re tired. You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and you’re trying not to tell him that you love him, and you’re trying to choke down the feeling, and you’re trembling, but he reaches over and he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your heart taking root in your body, like you’ve discovered something you didn’t even have a name for.’

"Yo, you know plagiarism is probably the least effective way to my heart, right?” Nursey chirps.

“I know that, idiot,” Dex starts. “I- I’m not saying I wrote it. I just-”

“I know, man.” Nursey’s hand tightens around Dex’s.

And then Nursey’s kissing him, and Dex could almost cry for all that he feels he doesn’t deserve it after this past month. They break apart soon, though, and Dex takes the moment to hold Nursey out at arm’s length.

“I'msosorryDerekyoudeservebetterthanthisI'lltryharderforyou,” Dex breathes out.

“Hey, chill. I’m not blind, you know? You’re doin’ everything you can, Will. Just… just let me help you too, y'know? If you’re too busy to leave your damn room, let me come to you. It’ll kill me, but I can catch up on my readings and… not distract you.” He waits a beat for Dex to answer, and when he doesn’t, he continues, “Or I can meet you in between classes and walk you to your next one, or we can call each other… I just miss you.”

Dex’s eyes start darting here and there, like he’s looking for something in Nursey’s, and he finally answers: “Yeah. Yeah, I’d like that.” He’s sniffling now. “Let me do better.”

And with that, Dex leans in to kiss the smile sprouting on Nursey’s lips.

(And then vehicular cuddles. A lot of them. To the point where Nursey has to drive them back because Dex is half-asleep.)

How to Successfully Adopt a Lifestyle Change

Not a diet. Diet implies temporary, and what we need to do is form a set of new, sustainable habits for the rest of our life.

A lot of you probably have a daydream of taking a black, billowy trash bag and planning a SWAT-style assault on your fridge and cupboards and then setting fire to the dumpster you hurl it into. Naturally, you’ll dash over to the grocery store and purchase a ton of strange-looking foods you don’t regularly eat, or never eat! Then you’ll slap on a pair of shiny new shoes and go run a 5K. This works for–some people. Honestly, few people.

The reality for many people; however, is they get off their foray after a few weeks. Why is that?

Think about it. How long did it take you to really get into the groove of your current habits? Months? Years? If you’re trying to simultaneously kiss soda and chip’s ass good-bye, change every bite of food you eat, and start a fitness routine. Guess what? Stress, stress, stress! Your stomach was used to those portion sizes (whether too large or too small) and some of your favorite snacks, your brain is literally addicted to it. A lot of people will reach nuclear meltdown levels trying to transition to a healthy lifestyle this way.

Just like it took you time to form your current habits, it’s going to take some time to form your new habits. I truly do empathize with the feelings of wanting everything to be different right now, but realistically we can only handle a certain amount of stressors and change at one time.

Start With Nutrition Habits: While I really would recommend finding a few cheeky ways to get more active, you’ve probably heard some variant of “can’t outrun your fork,” or “it’s 80% nutrition.” Well, it really is true. Being more active is absolutely crucial to improving overall health in the “endgame,”  but we’re still playing the “tutorial” and the dietary aspects of our lifestyle change are the bulk of the impact. It goes beyond that, though. I’ve written more about it here, but being a beginner can be genuinely hard at times!  It takes a lot of time and effort to get oneself to a point where they can physically and mentally handle what entails “regular, moderate exercise.” One part of making that transition easier will be better nutrition and hydration.

Start With an Easy Target: I always tell people if they drink a lot of soda, juice, or sweetened tea/coffee to start here. Sugar provides us pretty much no nutrition and removing the pulp from fruit makes juice not that great for us, either. Drinking more water is not negotiable and replacing these beverages with water will do a surprising amount of good for how you feel–all by itself. I recognize how hard this one can be to kick, but sweetened beverages really do load many people’s lifestyles with a lot of bad juju.

If you don’t have a beverage problem, maybe you do have a condiment/dressing problem and can reduce the quantities and find alternatives. Maybe you party-hardy a little too much and need to cut down on alcohol. While I said “easy target,” no one said it would be that easy, but you probably have an idea where most of these so called “empty” nutrients are coming from.

Transition Bad Habits a Few at a Time: The opening of this probably already made it clear, but Rome wasn’t built in a day. You probably have an idea of what some of your most problematic habits are, so choose one; maybe two, and see how you adjust over a week or two before considering the next step.

Small Swaps: Start switching out various items in your pantries, fridges, and lunchboxes with simple alternatives. Change white breads, rices, and pastas to brown. Take the bag of chips from your lunch and turn it into a few servings of seasonal fruit and vegetables. Pick out a leaner cut of meat and use a little less dairy, if you eat them. Little changes can have massive results.

Learn Moderation: Remember that whole sustainable part at the very beginning? Our lifestyles do need to reflect our real lives. Well, my real life has a love of chocolates, pastries, and candies. So, it’s not realistic for me to say “no chocolate, pastries, or candies.” Food molarity can be a pretty toxic outlook on eating and life in general. Instead of labeling foods as “bad,” just learn and respect the limits. There are times where you have to say, “enough, is enough,” but living in a constant state of “no” is not realistic or mentally healthy for most people. It’s OK to love indulgent food. Think about how long your life is going to be. So, now think about how dinky an occasional treat will be in retrospect.

Depending on Your Struggles, Consider Therapy: As we know, many aspects of unhealthy eating habits are actually unhealthy mental habits. Depending on the severity and exact nature of those problems, never be embarrassed to seek professional help. I struggled with stress eating and even binge eating for most of my adolescence, and finally getting help for my anxiety disorder played a pretty crucial role in improving both my physical and mental health. If it’s not a possibility at this time, consider journaling.

Walk Before Your Run: Literally and figuratively. I’m going to recommend this previous post I recently wrote again, but when you’ve gotten a few habits cracked and feel like you’re ready to start amping up your activity, start with low impact and low equipment exercises. If it has been years, or if you’ve never exercised, it takes some easing into it. I recommend walking to all beginners because we already know how to do it, have what we need to do it, and probably won’t hurt ourselves.

So, there you have it. Tackle small challenges and get your body acclimated to them before you consider some of the overarching and holistic goals you have for your lifestyle. That said, we’re all different. If you still want to try and do that 180-flip, I can’t stop you and some people are successful that way. No two people or personality types have the exact same problems or strategy for overcoming them. However, if you’ve gotten frustrated and thrown in the towel a time or two, consider the scope of change and how to realistically implement it over a period of time.  We didn’t form our old habits overnight.

Whisper

Summary: Nat does everything in her power to finally get you and Bucky together. 

Warnings: This is pretty much all smut: unprotected sex (please use protection), thigh riding, oral (m receiving), praise kink (kinda?). i think that’s it, let me know if you find anything else

Words: 3.4k

A/N: I finally wrote something! I have a few more pieces in the works now too. Sorry I haven’t been writing as much, but I am trying to work on that. Hope you enjoy. Send me requests here. 

Masterlist 

Originally posted by musicfixyou

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People talk about how Brendon refers to “Emerald City” in the song Kaleidoscope Eyes but why does no one talk about the line(s)


“I swear to God, I’d never heard a better sound coming out
Then when you’re whimpering my name from your mouth

I’ll plead the fifth on all of this”

okay, you know what i wanna talk about next? drunk jack zimmermann

3k, M, fluff!, alcohol use, basically happy fun sexy times with zimbits, fits in the dan erikson universe (but you don’t have to have read it to get it)

So, Drunk Jack Zimmermann:

I’m thinking that after Jack and Bitty come out, Jack is finally, finally able to take Bitty to a team fundraising event and they both dress up in nice suits and are more nervous than they are willing to admit because… it’s a hockey event for very wealthy people and, well, Bitty listens to his pre-game playlist and Jack goes in with a bit of a game face (and personally vows that he will cause a fucking scene if anyone says one wrong word to Bitty because he is done with being quiet. Bitty should not have to deal with anymore silence in his life.)

Of course, no one is more aware of Jack’s ‘ready to fucking throw down’ face then Eric R. Bittle because they’ve been dating for four years at this point and the last time he’s seen that face, Jack had gently but firmly taken the phone from Bitty’s hands and informed Mrs. Bittle that she was not to call again unless she planned on doing something other than crying.

So Bitty puts on his (slightly more mild) version of a ‘here to fight’ face and they head out.

And then it is very, very awkward because here they are, two gays boys ready to take on the establishment, and it seems no one even wants to fight them. Jack gets swarmed when he arrives (obviously, he is the Captain who led the Falconers to a Stanley Cup Victory in his third year in the league) but no one tries to separate them and no one rudely ignores Bitty in favor of talking to Jack and, really, many people seemed absolutely thrilled that Bitty is there.

So, when a server comes around and offers the group drinks, Jack feels confident enough to release his hold on Bitty and actually take one.

And it just keeps getting better and better. After the first hour or so, Jack has put in enough face time to keep the high-ups happy and they are free to hang out with his team and their wives and more servers come around and Bitty has switched to his left side so he can drink and let his arm dangle off his boyfriend and then when he sees one of his teammates sneak a quick kiss from his girlfriend, Jack realizes that he can do that too and does and–

This is fun.

They are out and no one is being a jerk and Bitty looks fantastic and Jack is allowed to put his hand on Bitty’s shoulders and his lower back and–

“Jack!” Bitty hisses, laughing and pushing at him. “We are at a formal event!”

Okay. Not there. He can’t quite put his hand there.

Keep reading

consider these:

  • there’s a long ass train and we’ve been waiting for it to pass for twenty minutes and you’re leaning out of the window of your car yelling at it so i’ll make some polite conversation au
  • i’m somewhere past drunk and decidedly lost and you’re a kindly local on a nighttime outing au
  • i ran away from home and knocked on the wrong door but you want to take me in anyway au
  • waiting in a holding cell together for our friends to bail us out and you’re unexpectedly cool au
  • are they staring at me or staring into the space around me i can’t tell and it’s intimidating au
  • i come here when i want to be alone and i didn’t think anyone knew about it so where the hell did you come from au
  • met you at a bar but it turns out you’re a soldier and you’re getting shipped into combat tomorrow au
  • gave a running hug to the wrong person at the airport and knocked you to the ground au
  • i’m a government worker and i had to seduce you for a case but i’m starting to like you legitimately au
  • you came to look at the puppies i have for sale and you’re so into it that i can’t help but kneel down and help you assess them au
  • walking between my s.o and you and i grabbed the wrong damn hand au
  • called the wrong number and confessed my love to you in a sappy way before you could get a word in au
  • we were studying across from each other in the library not acknowledging each other for hours and you passed out and fell onto my book so i’m screwed au