maybe i never even knew you at all

i think i fell in love with you long before i realized
but come to think of it
how could i not?
after all of the late night conversations
and the times you were my shoulder to cry on
  after the hugs that felt like home
  and all of the times you were my hand to hold
  after the “good morning” and “good night” messages
  and all of the phone calls you made just to make sure i was okay
  after all of the times you made me laugh when it felt like i would never smile again
  and all of moments and memories we can never tell a soul
  maybe i didn’t even really fall for you
  i think i just woke up one day
  and i knew
  that you were the one who i wanted by my side
  through thick and thin
  for better or for worse
  it’s always been you
  and i hope it always will be you
—  Anonymous said: Can you write something about falling in love with your best friend?
(cc, 2017)
I was losing my grip and you just stood there, watching me, suffocating and drowning, until I couldn’t make another sound. I was losing me, losing myself, and you didn’t stop me. You knew exactly what I was doing, where I was going, how this would all turn out, and not once, did you ever try and stop me. Maybe that’s why I could never seem to let you back in, because you left me. And even though I pushed and pushed, you were supposed to come back. No matter how far, you were supposed to come back, you were always supposed to come back, but you didn’t. And now, I have no one, because it was supposed to be you. It should’ve been you, it was always you.
—  c.f. // “growing up is full of shit”
archiveofourown.org
Stargazing - larry_phanatic - One Direction (Band) [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
By Organization for Transformative Works

“What do you want, then?”
“I want to fall in love,” Harry didn’t even need to think about it, “I mean, I want to find the one.”
Gemma let out a soft puff, as if to say ‘I knew it’, which wasn’t all that impossible since it apparently was all Harry could talk about. When she spoke, her tone was affectionate and sweet. “Of course you do.”

Or: the one where Harry really loves stargazing but somehow it’s never about actual stars.

Love was never supposed to hurt this much

Plot - Loving him was never easy, but no one said it was going to be. Love could conquer anything. Right?

Words - 5,400

Pairing - Bucky X Reader

Warnings - ANGST! Major character death. The smallest amount of fluff in the world.

A/N - I have already posted this once before so if you think you’ve read it then you probably have. I deleted my secondary blog with the same name so I could change it to my primary. Anyway, I’m sorry for making you all suffer again. The angst is real.

Originally posted by stupidteletubbie

**

Love. It had always been a foreign concept to you, but god the moment you laid eyes on him you knew – you damn well knew he was the one.

Even from birth you never knew the meaning of love. Your parents? The people who are supposed to love you unconditionally, it seemed they didn’t understand the meaning of it either – or maybe it was because your dad left so long ago, and it spiralled your mother into depression, pushing her towards alcohol. Then years later, when your mind was ridden with self-hatred, and depression sank its claws into your flesh, he came along.

The moment your eyes fell on him the breath was stolen from your lungs, yet you felt like you could breathe all-over again. Everything about him was beautiful – from the way his brunette hair fell into his eyes – and on the topic of his eyes, oh they were the most beautiful things you had ever seen in your life. They were bright blue, like the sky on a summers night – yet they were so dark and steely that you found yourself drowning in their depths, they were breath-taking on a whole other level. Then there was the way that his expanse of muscle rippled underneath his clothes and a smile which lit up your entire world and gave you the light you needed to guide you from the tunnel of self-hatred. He was perfect in every way possible.

Keep reading

moonlight - Joji

Someone requested softcore sex with Joji; I hope I did you justice even if it’s a bit short. >_<

***

“Mmmphh…” you moan between your clench teeth, then you bite your lip sensually to cover your screams of pleasure. His lips on your skin, kissing every segment he could find, caressing you with his lush lips, all over your body—his fingers tickle you, going up and down your spine, your stomach, your thighs…He creates sensations that you didn’t think you were capable of ever feeling, but maybe that’s because the others never knew how to touch you. Where to feel you up to make you twist and turn, to make you moist, to make the room spin. You loved the attention he was giving you, how he worshipped your entirety and how he complimented you. He was the only one that could make you feel this way, so loved…

Keep reading

“Fool Me Once” (Bad Boy!Jooheon Fluff)

Originally posted by jhopejung

Title: Fool Me Once

Featuring: Jooheon (Monsta x) x Reader

POV: First person

Rating: PG-13. Alcohol, bars, making out.

Summary: Jooheon seems like a typical bad boy who hangs around the wrong crowd, but after a chance meeting, he might be ready to change his ways.

Requested by @dyo-the-dinosaur!


When it came to the neighborhood I grew up in and the people I knew, you’d never guess what a square I was. You’d think I’d fall into line with everyone else, but I’d gone the opposite; studious, always trying to keep to the straight and narrow and follow all the rules, to the point where even the thought of going against the grain made me itch.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I don't think the rubies would have a deep enough relationship to have nicknames for eachother. I mean when our ruby infiltrated them they couldn't even pick her out? If they knew each other so well then that would never happen, maybe this was the first mission with them all together and they are and can be building i stronger relationship with each other. Especially after being trapped in space with a common enemy making for great bonding time. It would be cool to see bonding growth in this ep.

i have my suspicion they were faking “knowing” our ruby to figure out what the earth inhabitants wanted (ie the “oh ruby, you’re so FORGETFUL~!“ line in reference to something the crew did "last time”)

i mean they may not have known the REST of them were gems but at least they just thought “oh hey another ruby? idk what her deal is but lets play along with this earth stuff til someone can tell us where jasper is”

If I knew that 6 months is all it would take for you to realize you don’t love me I wouldn’t have given you a key to my place and I wouldn’t have let you meet my whole family, I probably would have paid for dinner less.
If I knew that 4 months in you were so goddamn unhappy I wouldn’t have stayed. I wish you would have said “I don’t love you” sooner.
Correction, I wish you would have said “I will never love you” sooner.
Because maybe then I wouldn’t spend all this time thinking of reasons why I was never good enough and I have a list. You used to say you’re favorite thing about me was my laugh and I haven’t laughed since you.
If I knew that even after it was over I’d still be hurting, I would have never talked to you.
I wish you would have loved me too.
—  I’m still in love, Tell me you love me too.
I did everything right.
I gave my all each and every day.
I fought a losing battle tooth and nail
until it stripped away every vestige of my sanity.
It felt as if I were carrying the both of us.
As if I had to fight,
to care,
to love,
for the both of us.
In the end I lost.
It wasn’t because I couldn’t fight hard enough.
But because you could never match me.
Not my fury,
not my passion,
nor my love.
In the end,
I think I always knew
that I was just a little too much.
Not even your hurricane could quench my wildfire.
Maybe someday a gentle rain will be all it takes.
Maybe someday
when I’ve burnt out,
we can be.
—  whatifgodisacat 
PLEASE READ AND REBLOG.

Ok, so here goes my thing.

Since I was little, like, five or six years old, it happens to me this weird thing. I never knew why it happened.

My stomach began to feel so numb, like when you have been a long time pressing your leg and then you move it. My head felt numb too. And then, all around me turned blurry. I forgot what I had been doing, even if I was talking with someone.

The weirdest thing about this is that when I was like this I … Remembered? I don’t know, a word or two. These words came to me without explanation, and they were usually very dumb, “Flower”, “Dolphin”, “Beard”. There were times when I remembered even finished sentences.

I have been reading about disassociation. But I don’t know if this is about that, because:

*It only lasted two or three minutes, maybe four or five sometimes.

*I forgot the things I were doing, but when the thing was gone, I was able to remember.

*It didn’t happen when I was living a traumatic experience or something like that. I could be talking with someone or reading.

*I didn’t read anything about words of nowhere? They came because yes.

*It is not like I were out of the reality or something. I just feelt far from myself for some seconds.


I am writing this because I always had curiosity, I even write a list with the hour, the situation and the words I remembered. When I grew older, this thing didn’t happen so often, just occasionally. But recently, I had one of this moments, and I want to know about this.

If you read this, please, could you reblog it? It is very important, so even if you are not interested or you don’t know the answer, REBLOG. Please.

Thanks for read, and sorry for the English!

bewarefangirl  asked:

You know what I think about a lot? How Conner knew that Evan was named Evan in the computer lab. Maybe I missed something but I don't remember him saying his name before Connor came up to him and just the fact that Connor knew who Evan was kinda sorta makes me feel giddy on the inside

Wow you know what I never even realized Connor just knew his name. In fact both Murphy siblings knew Evan’s name without Evan telling them at all.

Do they have him in a class? Is it because Jared talks so loud and they happen to pick it up?

Its kinda bittersweet because here Evan thinks no one will ever notice him but yet there are two people who in some way or another do notice him.

War torn feelings

( Note in this the first generation of lambs are about 14 .  This is just a little one shot I wrote.  I hope you enjoy it!)

When Ludwig remember the wars and his past he broke down. It changed him as a person,  now all he could think about was the vast amount of death his people had caused the vast amount of death he’d caused. He keep it secret from the other lambs even his vatters.  He couldn’t , he was scared that if anyone knew they’d never look at him the same. He’d been a monster in their eyes.  He’d already imagined the disproving looks in there eyes maybe they’d even kick him out of the compound.  

So for weeks Ludwigs been bottling his feelings and fears for weeks. He trys to keep to the normal routine and act like himself but still some found out. 

Feliciano

Feliciano was the light In Ludwigs life despite his blindness he always bore a smile on his face.  He was so very talented so much so that Ludwig felt useless to him this didn’t make him bitter thought it only made Ludwig love him more so of course it had to be him that found out.

When he was frist questioned by Feliciano he pushed him away telling him he was fine . The second time however he broke.   All of the young Germans feelings , fears and memoirs came pouring out.  By the end of it all Ludwig was crying he trys to hide his face.  None of the other lambs had ever seen him cry.  Much to his suprise Feliciano didn’t laugh he just smiled hugging ludwig “ it’s okay Luddy” he said with a bright smile" I don’t think any different of you ! Your still my best friend" he says looking up at him.  Ludwig blushes a little his checks tainted red he feels his heart flutter in his chest" really? “ he ask softly looking down at the smaller lamb .  Feliciano nods ” of course your a great person" he says and with that Ludwig holds him tight and close to him" please never leave me feli" he says his blues eyes almost panicked.  Ludwig turly did love the young itlian. Feliciano smiles a little titling his head “ of course!  We’ll be together fover” he says grinning up Ludwig.  A few tears line Ludwigs eyes those words had comforted him despite all he’d done Feliciano would never turly leave him . Ludwig got the feeling they’d been throught a lot and would be throught more but throught it all they’d been together.  Feliciano gasp “ luddy are you okay? Did I say somthing wrong?” He ask looking at him.  

Ludwig shakes his looking at him “ nein I’m just happy..ich liebe dich feli ” he says his checks bright red. Feliciano eyes go wide and he  smiles brightly blushing “ ti  amo luddy? ” he says happily nuzzling Ludwig.  Ludwig blushes placing a kiss on Feliciano lips gently.  He certainly felt better with Feliciano by his side

( I really hope you enjoyed it. I apologize for any grammer flaws or misspellings. I just really love this au and I hope to write more for it soon )

anonymous asked:

I know Liam can tweet with perfect grammar but I always felt like his birthday tweet to Harry was too formal to be his. I mean Harry is has been his friend for 6 years and that tweet to him is a birthday tweet you'd send to somebody you barely knew, it was too professional

Hi anon,

Maybe, I do see your point and I’m not saying that every tweet of Liam’s was posted or created by him and have already said that quite probably the tweet tonight wasn’t posted by him, or even created by him either.

My point was to refute the notion that he’s never posted word and grammar perfect stuff and that he’s also never used grammar in a very clever way especially at times that have been quite pivotal and significant. 

And that is all I have to say about that. 

anonymous asked:

Excuse me, I just wanted to ask if you knew there is a nitw discord in the official Reddit? And was wondering if maybe yours is the same one? If not maybe both should merge together if that could happen idk 😓

Ours isn’t the same at all, just a little fan server some nerd made! (Miaw, me.) I don’t think they’ll ever combine, considering I’ve never even spoken to the creators or anything.

Shinedown sentence starters

leave a whisper

  • ❛ i can’t control the rage. ❜
  • ❛ sometimes i think i’m gonna go insane. ❜
  • ❛ that bruise on your face always seems to stay around. ❜
  • ❛ should i open up my eyes, or just ignore who you are? ❜
  • ❛ i’ve got nothing to lose, so let me be. ❜
  • ❛ i’m not perfect, and i don’t claim to be. ❜
  • ❛ i wonder if the things i did were just to be different. ❜
  • ❛ i don’t know you anymore.  i never knew you anyway. ❜
  • ❛ i’m sick and tired of ‘you’ll be fine.’ ❜ 
  • ❛ there’s no turning back now. ❜
  • ❛ everyone’s pointing their fingers, always condemning me. ❜

us and them 

  • ❛ all my heroes are dead and gone. ❜ 
  • ❛ you can put a man on trial, but you can’t make the guilty pay. ❜
  • ❛ i can hardly remember the look of my own eyes. ❜
  • ❛ there’s something i need you to see. ❜
  • ❛ maybe think about who you hurt in the process. ❜
  • ❛ you need to look at what you’ve become. ❜
  • ❛ you don’t even know me, ‘cause you never took the time. ❜
  • ❛ your eyes have turned a shade of empty. ❜
  • ❛ you can’t blame yourself for the world’s mistakes. ❜ 

the sound of madness

  • ❛ when are you gonna wake up and fight for yourself? ❜ 
  • ❛ you had everybody fooled in the end. ❜
  • ❛ i haven’t slept in what seems like a century. ❜
  • ❛ i’d sacrifice my beating heart before i’d lose you. ❜
  • ❛ i can’t sleep without you next to me. ❜
  • ❛ the only thing that i still believe in is you. ❜
  • ❛ i have not one shred of sympathy. ❜
  • ❛ i have no use for apologies. ❜
  • ❛ i feel like i’m breaking inside. ❜
  • ❛ tell me it’s over; i’ll still love you the same. ❜
  • ❛ don’t worry.  i’ll be fine. ❜

amaryllis 

  • ❛ what part of living says you gotta die? ❜ 
  • ❛ i could get used to your company. ❜
  • ❛ i’m not gonna leave you behind. ❜
  • ❛ it’s a cold, cruel, harsh reality. ❜
  • ❛ am i sick, or am i gifted? ❜
  • ❛ guess who’s back and mad as hell? ❜
  • ❛ you are the miracle in me. ❜
  • ❛ don’t worry.  i’ll keep you warm. ❜
  • ❛ without a doubt, i’m on your side. ❜
  • ❛ there’s nowhere else that i would rather be. ❜
  • ❛ the world will never know you like i do. ❜

threat to survival

  • ❛ you can blame bad luck, but you were asking for it. ❜ 
  • ❛ hold your breath and count to ten. ❜
  • ❛ i’m full of deep cuts, right down to the marrow. ❜
  • ❛ the harder you push, the rougher i get. ❜
  • ❛ every day is do or die. ❜
  • ❛ the truth will rise to tear you apart. ❜
  • ❛ time doesn’t erase the demons you don’t see. ❜
  • ❛ i won’t be left defenseless. ❜
  • ❛ guilty, i may be, but don’t give up on me. ❜
  • ❛ i know you’re worth the risk. ❜
3

(x) (x)

In your gut you knew that you should have lied when Dean asked why you had dressed up so nice, but you tried to not to make a habit of lying to your brothers. After all, they were the only family you had left.

As soon as Benny was in the door, Dean was all over him. You flushed in embarrassment as your two older brothers grilled Benny, asking him why he asked you out in the first place when he knew how much danger just his presence was putting you in.

You tried to cut in to argue, and maybe convince them to stop treating you like a child all the time, but their voiced drowned out yours. Instead you just crossed your arms on your chest and waited for their booming words to die down.

“Now hold on boys,” Benny said in his smooth voice, his hands held up in defense. Even now he held that southern boy charm that made you melt where you stood. “You know I’d never do nothing to intentionally put (Y/N) in harm’s way. Dean, we fought side by side for months in Purgatory. If somethin’ was to ever come after us, you know I’m the best man for the job.”

“You can’t keep me locked up forever,” you added.

It took a moment before Dean nodded and then said, “Be home by eleven.”

You rolled your eyes but Benny grabbed your hand, winking at Dean and saying, “You got it, chief.”

we fucked today, in the fast way, in the i need you right now, consume me, stay with me even though i fucking hate you kind of way, and when it was done we talked about the future like maybe we would still be speaking to each other when the new year came, but we both knew we wouldn’t, i think pretending it was going to be okay took the burn out, in the aftermath of a fire you don’t talk about all of the rubble and ashes that you still need to sift through before you clean up, you talk about what you are going to build in order to make it better, i know it’s never going to be better, it’s all gone, every inch of it, even though all of the memories are still intact.

There’s this ~13 year old boy who rides a dirt bike obnoxiously fast through the neighborhood every night (with no helmet this kid is an idiot). Yesterday my neighbor, a young black girl maybe 10 years old, stepped out into the street almost causing the boy to crash. He whipped his dirt bike around and yelled “you stupid fucking n*gger” and pretended like he was going to run her over.

I couldn’t even believe it. Who raises their kids to be that hateful? I knew this side of town was trashy but I never thought I’d see something like that happen. All the neighbors were outside and nobody batted an eye. No more than 5 minute’s later a different​ boy started chasing her in the street with a broom handle trying to hit her. Luckily the boys mom saw and freaked out.

I just feel so bad for this little girl. She’s always wondering up and down the street with her little sister looking for someone​ to play with. I always see them sitting on the side of the road playing in the dirt.

Fuck both of those boys honestly. I wish there was something I could do.

pomegranates are a tough fruit to love.
it is tough opening them
tough eating them
tough cleaning up afterwards.
so when they told me
that was the fruit you decided to pick
i was surprised.
apples, sure.
maybe even oranges.
but pomegranates?
i never understood why you
with all your power
decided to go the hard way.
pry the fruit open with your bare hands
fingers bloody from nails breaking
i didn’t understand your choice.
until one day 
i did.

the legends often forget your spirit.
they categorize you under 
stupid little girl who got kidnapped
who didn’t listen to what she was told.
i am ashamed to admit how long
it took me to start loving you.
and the thing they forget about you
is that you were smart.
you were calculating.
you saw an opportunity
and you grabbed it.
i admire you.
you tricked the entirety of olympus.
no one can say that.

pomegranates are a tough fruit to love.
but you were never the one to turn down 
a challenge.
your marriage shows it.
so in one bite you stopped a war
but not before you made your hands bloody.
in many ways
you chose your fruit well.
pomegranates guard their insides
with much care
and if you are not careful
they cause a mess.

—  to persephone, who chose her battles wisely (2:46am // nyx)