Snapshots [Chriseva/Post 4.10/Future Fic]
Dedicated to all the Chriseva fans left hurt, angry and disappointed by the finale. I wrote this as something therapeutic for myself to try and get over my sadness even though I didn’t think I could ever bring myself to read or write another Chriseva fic again.
May we all stick together and bring each other up in this time sadness. I love you guys. The Chriseva fans have been some of the nicest and best people I’ve met on this site.
I hope that this may ease maybe a little bit of the hurt we’re all feeling.
When Eva was fifteen, she thought she had everything figured out. If someone had asked her then where she saw herself in ten years, she’d probably said married to Jonas with two kids, a pair; one boy and one girl; the girl with a long mane of cascading black hair and the boy with a head of tight strawberry blond curls and the eyebrows to match. Or it could be the other way around, or neither, it didn’t really matter to her. But she genuinely saw her happily ever after with Jonas and if she pretended hard enough she’d be able to ignore the agonizing stab of guilt that came along with it.
When Eva was sixteen, she just wanted to make it through the school year without too much trouble and she wanted Jonas to love her the way she loved him and she kept hoping that he wouldn’t keep putting her in the corner with the rest of the things he constantly took for granted. At least that’s what Eva felt on the inside, on the outside she was living her happily ever after with Jonas. Right?
When Eva was seventeen, she just wanted to party and she wanted to fuck, all the time and everyone. She partied with Chris most of the time and fucked him even more frequently than that. Chris was easy; he didn’t expect anything more, just like she wasn’t willing to give anything more. He always came prepared with his Cheshire cat grin and his devil-may-care attitude and he was hot as shit and fucked just as well. He was what Eva needed in the moment. But just that moment. Right?
When Eva was eighteen, everything suddenly turned out too complicated. Chris wanted something more, more than she was willing to give, and Eva fell back into old habits, doing the same thing she always did when things got too hard: she ran. This time the path led her to Jonas’s door and his bed. But this was what she really wanted, right? Getting back on the right path, the path that included Jonas and their two kids and the white picket fence on their lawn and the big blue house that sat at the edge of the cobblestone path. Chris said he loved her and that he was ready to settle down with her even though she wasn’t, and as it turned out, Chris wasn’t ready either.
They came together but they left separately, but that was okay.
When Eva was nineteen she realized that Jonas would never really change; not for her, not for anyone. She’d fallen back into bad habits and lost the voice she’d finally acquired after so long. Once again her opinions always came in second; her needs were always put last and her feelings were always made to be a joke. One day, Eva just picked up her strewn clothes from off the floor and left, and she never looked back.
When Eva was twenty she put herself first for the first time in her life. She finally put men to the side and hooked up only on the weekends when she’d meet up with the girls for a night out. She went back to school and studied to be a teacher; perhaps one day she would be able to help a kid avoid making the same mistakes she had in her youth. She still partied hard on the weekends with her crew. They’d laughed when she used that term for the first time, but Eva thought it was appropriate. The little voice in the back of her head laughed at the irony of everything, but for some reason the laughter sounded too familiar, but it didn’t belong to her.
Every night though, she’d go home alone, but that was okay.
When Eva was twenty one, she met Chris by chance at the club during the weekend she was out. He was DJ-ing at the club that night and meeting him had been purely by chance, or maybe it had been fate instead. She went back home with him that night and he left early in the morning after fixing her breakfast. He had another gig that night in a club in a different city. They promised to keep in touch.
They didn’t, but that was okay.
When Eva was twenty-two, Vilde announced that she and Magnus had gotten engaged. Everyone thought it was too soon, but no one said anything, not even Sana. Magnus made Vilde happy and it was obvious and that was the only thing that mattered. She asked them to be her bridesmaids at her wedding and all of them were too happy to oblige. That night they went out and got shit faced drunk. Eva had sex with the bartender in the backroom of the club, but she left alone.
When Eva was twenty-three, Vilde and Magnus married. She, Sana and Noora were the bridesmaids and Chris was the maid of honour. Vilde looked absolutely stunning in her white dress and Magnus looked smart and sharp in his tailored suit. Eva didn’t think she’d ever seen Vilde that genuinely happy in her life. Perhaps it was only in part because of the wedding, the other part was probably because her mom was there, present and sober and walked her proudly down the aisle.
When Eva was twenty-four, she finished her studies and moved out of her mom’s house into her own apartment. She found employment in the elementary school just down the street from her new place and it was perfect. Everything was perfect. The day she graduated, her mom and her friends all managed to make it to the ceremony to watch her receive her degree. It was the proudest moment of her life. She went out partying that night with her girls at the club and the DJ playing the music winked at her from across the room. She was too drunk on alcohol and giddiness to really pay attention to the person until she was locking lips with him in the dark corner of the club while the music was blaring in the background.
Chris went home with her that night and they stayed in the whole weekend fucking.