maybe a print

I imagine relationships, even very sincere ones, are super hard when you have secret agendas.

Today I learned wine sometimes helps with paintings??  Also, in the absence of a moody title, here are my two standard playlists of Solavellan music.

controversial opinion

people who are straight and cis: your friends and relatives should not be forced to choose between giving you an entire 101-level education in gender and sexuality or forever suffering through your clueless remarks/questions that, trust me, are sometimes incredibly painful, however well-intentioned you are

and they definitely should not have to spend years laying this groundwork of educating you in order to feel safe coming out to you

do. your own. research.

Even if you think you don’t know anyone who isn’t straight and cis, I guarantee you that you are wrong, and you should educate yourself so you’re not an additional burden to them before or after they come out to you. It is unfair to expect them to personally tutor you out of your cluelessness, when they’re the marginalised person and you’re the one with nothing to lose.

You have Google. Use it. And actively seek out writers who are trans and gay and bi etc and read what they have to say. Don’t rely on whatever bits of mainstream or even feminist media drift your way. Your loved ones deserve better.

Love,

someone you know who has to brace every time this topic comes up because you literally do not know how offensive you’re being, I love you but oh my god, please stop