may or may not be numb to the hits by now

A handy list of poisons for writing reference, provided to you by me, Bella

Poisoning is one of the oldest murder tactics in the books. It was the old equalizer, and while it’s often associated with women, historically men are no less likely to poison you. This is not a guide on how to poison people, you banana bunches, it’s a guide on writing about poisons in fiction so you don’t end up on a watch list while researching them. I’ve taken that hit for you. You’re welcome. These are just a few of the more classic ones.

  • Hemlock: Hemlock (conium maculatum) is one of the more famous ones, used in ancient times most notably in Socrates’ forced suicide execution. So it goes. The plant has bunches of small, white flowers, and can grow up to ten feet tall. It’s a rather panicky way to die, although it wouldn’t show: hemlock is a paralytic, so the cause of death is most often asphyxiation due to respiratory paralysis, although the mind remains unaffected and aware.
  • Belladonna: Atropa belladonna is also called deadly nightshade. It has pretty, trumpet-shaped purple flowers and dark, shiny berries that actually look really delicious which is ironic since it’s the most toxic part of the plant. The entire plant is poisonous, mind you, but the berries are the most. One of the most potent poisons in its hemisphere, it was used as a beauty treatment, so the story says, and rubbed into the eyes to make the eyes dilate and the cheeks flush. Hench the name beautiful lady. The death is more lethargic than hemlock, although its symptoms are worse: dilated pupils, sensitivity to light, blurred vision, tachycardia, loss of balance, staggering, headache, rash, flushing, severely dry mouth and throat, slurred speech, urinary retention, constipation, confusion, hallucinations, delirium, and convulsions. It’s toxic to animals, but cattle and rabbits can eat it just fine, for some reason. 
  • Arsenic: Arsenic comes from a metalloid and not a plant, unlike the others here, but it’s easily the most famous and is still used today. Instead of being distilled from a plant, chunks of arsenic are dug up or mined. It was once used as a treatment for STDs, and also for pest control and blacksmithing, which was how many poisoners got access to it. It was popular in the middle ages because it looked like a cholera death, due to acute symptoms including stomach cramps, diarrhea, confusion, convulsions, vomiting, and death. Slow poisoning looked more like a heart attack. The Italians famously claimed that a little arsenic improved the taste of wine.
  • Strychnine: Strychnine (strick-nine) is made from the seed of strychnos nux vomica and causes poisoning which results in muscular convulsions and eventually death through asphyxia. Convulsions appear after inhalation or injection—very quickly, within minutes—and take somewhat longer to manifest after ingestion, around approximately 15 minutes. With a very high dose, brain death can occur in 15 to 30 minutes. If a lower dose is ingested, other symptoms begin to develop, including seizures, cramping, stiffness, hypervigilance, and agitation. Seizures caused by strychnine poisoning can start as early as 15 minutes after exposure and last 12 – 24 hours. They are often triggered by sights, sounds, or touch and can cause other adverse symptoms, including overheating, kidney failure, metabolic and respiratory acidosis. During seizures, abnormal dilation, protrusion of the eyes, and involuntary eye movements may occur. It is also slightly hallucinogenic and is sometimes used to cut narcotics. It also notably has no antidote. In low doses, some use it as a performance enhancer.
  • Curare: Chondrodendron tomentosum is lesser known than its famous cousins, but kills in a very similar way to hemlock. It is slow and terrible, as the victim is aware and the heart may beat for many minutes after the rest of the body is paralyzed. If artificial respiration is given until the poison subsides, the victim will survive.
  • WolfsbaneAconitum has several names; Monkshood, aconite, Queen of Poisons, women’s bane, devil’s helmet) and is a pretty, purple plant with gourd-shaped flowers. The root is the most potent for distillation. Marked symptoms may appear almost immediately, usually not later than one hour, and with large doses death is near instantaneous. Death usually occurs within two to six hours in fatal poisoning. The initial signs are gastrointestinal including nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. This is followed by a sensation of burning, tingling, and numbness in the mouth and face, and of burning in the abdomen. In severe poisonings pronounced motor weakness occurs and sensations of tingling and numbness spread to the limbs. The plant should be handled with gloves, as the poison can seep into the skin.
  • FoxgloveDigitalis is large with trumpet-shaped flowers that can be many colors, but usually a pinkish shade. It may have from the term foxes-glew, which translated to fairy music. Intoxication causes nausea, vomiting and diarrhea, as well as sometimes resulting in xanthopsia (jaundiced or yellow vision) and the appearance of blurred outlines (halos), drooling, abnormal heart rate, cardiac arrhythmias, weakness, collapse, dilated pupils, tremors, seizures, and even death. Slowed heartbeat also occurs. Because a frequent side effect of digitalis is reduction of appetite and the mortality rate is low, some individuals have used the drug as a weight-loss aid. It looks a bit like comfrey, which is an aid for inflammation. Make sure not to confuse the two.
Criminal

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
◊ Summary: As a rogue werewolf, you knew the dangers of trespassing into a pack’s territory, but that didn’t stop you.
◊ Genre: smut, werewolf AU
◊ Warnings: sexual content
◊ Word Count: 4,904 

A/N: Okay wow. So this took me 300 years to write, but I finally finished it! This is the longest thing I’ve ever written, and it’s also my first smut scenario. Tagging @chokemejimin because you wanted to read it and @kookingtae because we screamed about this together lmao. Hope you enjoyed!


You hadn't planned on getting caught. You had hoped for the exact opposite, actually.

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The Only Exception (Part 1)

Summary: AU. Reader is given the task of running a popular love advice internet show when her coworker is fired. Her cynical attitude toward love makes her offer some harsh advice, and more than a few hearts are caught in the aftermath. Will hers be one of them?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 3,442

Warnings: language, fluff, wishful thinking, hot firemen, sarcasm, cynicism, bad jokes

A/N: Okay, so I saw a movie a long long time ago that was terrible, but it inspired the ‘bad’’ love advice and the firemen. I’ve been dying to have fireman!Bucky in one of my AUs.

And yes, the title comes from the Paramore song. I felt like it’s how reader feels throughout. Hope you guys like it. I had some writer’s block, and some house guests, so this is a little late being posted.

Part - 1 - 2 - 3 -

Originally posted by 8bit-arc-reactor

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Take Your Pain  {Part 1/2}

Steve x Reader
Summary: Soulmate AU in which Steve overestimates the powers of the super soldier serum and comes to a startling realization

Prompt: You can choose to take the pain of your soulmate away (from this post)

Word Count: 2163
Warnings: none

Originally posted by snowbutlannister

Soulmates were a thing of the past. 

Although it had been common throughout the early 1900s to be born with the small cursive words on your wrist, after the second world war more and more children were born without them. Many blamed it on the plethora of chemical and nuclear weapons, others on the traumatizing pain it had caused throughout the war, but nobody knew for sure why they had disappeared.

That’s why it had been such a big deal when you’d been born with a mark. Your grandparents, old enough to have their own, were ecstatic. Your parents, on the other hand, had urged you to keep it hidden away from the public. It was unusual in their day and age and they feared the attention it might bring.

So for much of your childhood you listened intently to your grandfather’s stories of soulmates in his time, eyes wide and a large grin plastered on your face despite having to keep your own mark a secret.

However, the excitement soon disappeared as you grew older.

Grandma explained that during the war the only way to know if your soulmate was alive and well was to feel for their pain. When your soulmate was hurt a numbness would spread across your own body, alerting you and allowing you to choose whether or not to take that pain away. When you failed to feel that numbness even through your teenage years, you knew what it meant. You might have been lucky to be born with a soulmate, but you sure as hell weren’t lucky enough to meet them.

The supersoldier serum pumping through Steve’s veins did many things. He could run faster, think harder, jump higher and most important of all, he could heal quicker. It was a significant advantage he had over the rest of the Avengers. Even with a bullet in his side Steve would push forwards, the pain all but forgotten and his enhanced body already racing to repair itself.

What Steve didn’t realize was that his pain wasn’t just being forgotten – it was being taken away.

On the other side of Manhattan, another person was willingly taking the pain as their own. Every bullet wound, every slash of a knife she felt so he wouldn’t. She wouldn’t let him. He was her soulmate and after believing he was gone for so many years, she would do anything to protect him.

So Steve continued on fighting, completely unaware that the girl he’d thought was left in the past was in fact alive and well only a few kilometers away.

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4

You pace around your living room, your fingers interlaced into a deadly grip, your knuckles turning white under the pressure, as you keep biting down your bottom lip. You’re nervous, scared, because what you have to say sounds absolutely insane to you too and you have absolutely no idea how you’re going to explain it to him, let alone make him believe any word you’ll say.
When you hear the faint knocks on your door you jump on your feet, your insides twitching as you rush to open it and let him in.
He looks tired, purple decorating his eyebags as he stares at you, his hands slightly trembling for the pent-up worry of the last hours and it makes your heart shrink because you realize that you are the source of his pain in both present and future.
“I’m sorry”, you whisper, faintly, your eyes landing on the ground into a vain attempt to keep the tears from flowing out.
“Tell me what is going on”, his voice is strained, almost cold, revealing pretty clearly his anger. He is trying, you know he is, to not yell at you because you scared him to death, but what you’re met with still hurts you and scares you.
“Remember your promise”, your voice cracks as you say so, taking in a deep breath to calm your wrecked nerves.
“Look at me”, he says, his voice softer now as he grabs your chin to lift your head up, forcing you to meet his dark gaze, “I love you, Y/N. You can tell me everything, ok?”, a small smile curves his lips, encouraging you to trust him like you always did before.
“I didn’t run away from you”, your voice is feeble, the fear too much to be contained at this point, but you keep going, the words flowing out slightly easing your troubled heart, “I was here the whole time… just in another time”, you shake your head, your words sounding confusing and senseless even to your own ears.
“I don’t know how or why… but I’ve been in the future Kookie”, you blink your eyes rapidly, the tears caught between your lashes making your vision blurry, “I was dead”, you whisper, your eyes closing so you don’t have to watch his confused expression anymore. He doesn’t believe you, clearly, and you can’t blame him. Of course, he doesn’t. Who in his right mind would?
He sharply takes in air, letting you go completely, taking a few steps back.
“Do you think this is funny, Y/N?”, he asks, his voice defeated, “I was here worrying about you, neglecting my work and responsibilities, and all you have to say is pure bullshit?”, his voice gets angrier with every word that escapes his mouth hitting you with the force of a hurricane, “I deserve better than this”, he adds, turning his back on you for the briefest of moments.
“If you have someone else just say so. I prefer the truth to this pathetic joke”, he turns back to you again but his eyes never meet yours, in fact, they land on everything except you.
“I’m not lying”, you whisper, the tears already wetting your cheeks, panic shooting through your entire body. How can you make him believe you? What proof could you possibly give him when it sounds impossible to you too?
“Whatever”, that’s all he says before he heads for the door, the anger so palpable in his voice you’re scared this may actually be the end.
“Wait! Jungkook wait, please!”, you run after him grabbing his arm to yank him backwards before he can leave your apartment for good.
He turns towards you, pure fury in his eyes as he finally meets your gaze again making you wish he never did.
“Wait for what?! MORE LIES?”, he’s basically screaming at this point, your body shaking so hard you think it may even snap in half.
You want to explain, you want him to believe you, you want him to be next to you and help you because you have no idea how to escape this from happening again.
“I’m gonna die in a week”, that’s what escapes your mouth and you watch with horror his features harden even more as he forcefully removes your grip on his wrist.
“I don’t care.”, that’s what he decides to say even though it’s far from the truth. He doesn’t want to hurt you and he’s certain he’ll end up doing just that if he keeps standing there, talking like this when his emotions all over the place.
Without adding anything he turns his back on you again and before you can stop him the headaches comes back, as strong as always, making you choke on thin air.
Your hands fly to your temples in a vain attempt to stop the pain and a scream escapes your mouth before you can even register it.
Your legs give in, your vision turning white under the burning pain, your ears numb to the way Jungkook calls your name, apprehension the only thing visible in his features now. He grabs your wrists trying to yank them down so he can look at your face. Panic shoots through him when you stop breathing under his gaze, the pain shooting through you taking over all the vital functions of your body.
He calls your name caressing your face in an attempt to soothe you but he’s only left with pure horror when you turn into nothing but thin air. You weren’t lying. And that thought scares him more than anything.


EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IT’S WRONG [part 6] - it all starts with a terrible headache and he acting like he has absolutely no idea who you are. JUNGKOOK X READER { ANGST

complete series:  [part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5] [part 6]

today i was reflecting in the shower.. where i normally do all of my deeper thinking.. and i couldn’t stop thinking about 2016. i know.. we’re in a new year.. time to let it go.. but i don’t think i properly cleansed myself or made peace with how my year went. and because a lot of what happened to me throughout the year continuously comes to mind.. i knew it was time to sit down and write out my feelings. what has made me the writer or “poet” that i am today.. is i’ve spilled my heart out on paper, time and time again, but lately i’ve been extremely distant. i’m not sure whether it’s because i feel a burden to always be positive and uplifting or because i find myself more afraid than ever. last year i cried. and cried. and cried. more than i’ve ever cried in my 22 years of life. i even made a habit out of watching really sad and emotional movies just so i could find an excuse to. also.. i’ve smoked more than ever before. longing to both - feel.. and be numb. i’d smoke before writing so i could pull certain stories out of me. then i’d smoke after, to forget them. often times.. i just got high enough to make myself fall asleep so i wouldn’t have to deal with anything. in the midst of one of my episodes.. i realized i suffer, and have always suffered, from feeling like nobody really understands me. i’ve always felt like i was someone who was constantly mistaken for an entirely different person. i always feel like i don’t “fit”. i don’t fit around friends.. i don’t fit around family.. i don’t make sense at social gatherings.. i don’t feel at home in my own home. i think a lot of these feelings have come up, from time to time, because i’ve never really known my true identity. all i’ve ever known myself to be is someone that everyone clings to. and not in a “she’s the life of the party” kind of way, but more so, “she’s the person to get advice from” way. and although.. this may sound selfish, sometimes i wish i had someone like me. i wish i had someone who was willing to help solve my problems before solving their own. as i’m typing, i’m starting to cry again. and i’m crying because i don’t know when exactly this will end. or if this discomfort is how i’m meant to live life. maybe this is just the life of an empathic. maybe when i started asking god to “use” me, i signed up for this. the truth is, 2016 should have been the best year of my life. i released a book that hit the best sellers list, i bought my dog that brings an unlimited source of awe to my life, i signed a major publishing deal, i moved out of my parents house and into a new home, i lost friends that never clapped for me, and gained friends who’ve been there for me in every way since, i built this whole “brand” into something much bigger than i ever expected myself to, i found out i was cancer free, i promise the list could continue on. but depression got in the way. of everything. i never once celebrated myself. i never once intervened, and took control. i never even thought to. i felt like whatever i was going through.. i was supposed to. and still.. i’m not sure the reasoning.. i just kept living with a kind of sadness i have yet to find a name for. instead of focusing on all of the goodness that god was placing in my life, i had tunnel vision on everything that i felt was going wrong. i couldn’t see life in a positive light no matter how good things may have got. my parents split up. i was forced to move out. i lost my home base. i went, and still go, months without speaking to either one. my boyfriend was dealing with an ex who continuously threatened to take her life at the account of us being together. all i wanted to do was help her. but couldn’t. i had a new life to take care of, when i could barely take care of my own self. i lost all my friends. literally, every single one. i never ever could leave the house because of how bad my social anxiety was getting. i found out i had a fractured jaw because of the size of a tumor that was holding it in place. i found out i had a fucking tumor that could have been cancerous. i had reconstructive jaw surgery that ruined the nerve and feeling in my mouth. i could not eat or sleep or talk straight for months. i’m still dealing with the pain. i was consistently working and doing interviews right after my surgery. i was and am still extremely exhausted from this. i never properly allowed myself to rest or heal. i started working with a team that could not fully ever understand me which only added to my frustration, loneliness, and sadness. and again, THIS LIST could go on. but more than anything. i was bullied. as my brand kept getting bigger, i was bullied more. and more. and i couldn’t understand how my work, trying to help and heal people, could bring in such negative responses. i couldn’t understand why there were people who were so eager to tear me apart, they would start to attack my image. everyday people attack the way i look and sound. and this kind of bullying brought back a lot of old feelings that i never dealt with as a kid. growing up i was constantly brought down and picked on because of the way i look. i was never skinny enough. or pretty enough. or i was too hairy. or my teeth were too crooked. or my hair was too nappy. or i was too dark. or i was too “black”. or i wasn’t “black enough”. now, i’m receiving - i’m too stupid or i’m too fake. my writing isn’t good enough. my writing is cliche. i look like a monkey. and so on. and so forth. and as i’m typing these things.. i find myself giggling a bit, wondering why i even allow these things to bother me. but truthfully, all negativity from outside sources bothers me. no matter what form it comes in. i always question, “what have i done to deserve this?” and although i often ignore these nasty comments, i’ve realized i harbor the feelings i receive when i see these comments. embarrassment. frustration. confusion. hurt. disappointment. betrayal. i let these statements affect me to the point where i’m starting to silence my voice. i’m starting to be more afraid to speak up for myself. the thought of confrontation makes me nervous. the thought of even receiving any awful comments makes my stomach flip. so i won’t say anything at all. i’ll keep everything to myself if it’ll keep the mean people and their nasty opinions away. but i’m trying to break out of this. i really am. i’m trying to be more understanding of the way people work. i know.. that the way we treat people is a reflection of the way we treat or view ourselves. meaning.. those who are willing to go out of their way to attack a person for absolutely no reason, ultimately feel that they need to. either because, they don’t have enough love for themselves, to be consumed within themselves and their own positivity, or, simply, they hate themselves just as much as they hate me. and not personally, but mainly, their views of life are formed in a negative and hateful way.. more often than not. idk.. maybe i’m getting too ahead of myself. or maybe i make sense and i’m afraid no one will understand it. lol. but anyway. idk. i’m just glad i got to get these things off my chest because i feel like my readers.. and supporters.. or those who just fuck with me, for whichever reason.. are always looking forward to hearing from me. and i’m trying to, again, be more accepting of the fact that not everyone is going to always like my shit. my writing. my poetry. my points of view. my ideas. and that’s okay. that doesn’t make me any less of an artist or woman or idealist.. and that doesn’t make whomever else any less than either. i’m thankful. for these moments of clarity because they really ground me and put me back in my place. i get to reflect on how i’ve sabotaged my own life.. and i pray that god help me heal from it. the reality of this all is.. i’m my own worse enemy. and i have been.. for most of my life. and i know this because i would have never ever allowed myself to go through all the hardships that i did. i would have never allowed myself to not only deal with half the people i’ve dealt with - but also.. i wouldn’t have allowed myself to be as affected by negativity as i was. all i was doing, and all i’ve been doing, is place energy in places and spaces that my energy was never meant to be. 2016 was the ending. i firmly believe this because there is always a storm before a sunny day. there were times last year when i thought i was out of touch with myself and i couldn’t hear god as clearly as i’m used to.. but really.. s/he was with me all along. guiding me to this place i’m in now. this place of - understanding, acceptance, and gratitude. i’m finally understanding that sometimes we go through shit. sometimes a lot of shit. but what we go through doesn’t define us. it shapes us into the people that we’re ultimately meant to be. stronger. wiser. and happier.. if anything. i’m finally accepting that some things, many things, are out of our control. but we have much more control than we think. the way we react to life will result in our karma. we can choose how to react and ultimately this will help affect all of our situations moving forward. i’m also learning to accept people as they are. everyone will do as they please. and not everyone will be considerate of mine, or anyone else’s, feelings. in knowing this, i have to constantly remind myself to not take anything personal. the longer i feed into other peoples negativity, the longer i’ll be miserable. misery is the result of not fully understanding or not fully having control over certain situations. but the more intuitive we are.. the easier it will be to keep away from misery. and finally.. i’m grateful for the one friend i had all along.. whom i never give enough credit to. my best friend and boyfriend. every single tear that came strolling down my cheek.. he was always here to help wipe and then uplift me. the more silence i become the more he encourages me to speak. even if he, himself, doesn’t fully understand. i’m grateful to god for showing up in all forms. people. places. numbers. symbols. etc. i cannot be anymore thankful for my relationship with god. for not only helping me get through one of the best/worst years of my life.. but also.. for giving me the strength to open up about it. knowing.. that everyone’s perception of me is that i’ve “got it all together.”
—  Reyna Biddy
Take Care

Take Care: Draco x Reader Imagine

Masterlist

Summary: A short, rather angst filled and also fluffy comfort Draco Imagine based on this Anon request:

I’m in dire need of some post war Draco fluff! I truthfully couldn’t think of anyone else that would do it as well as you! (no hate to any mother writing blogs I LOVE READING tHEM I sound like such a snob omg I don’t mean to) I’d really appreciate it! Also I’m sorry this is extremely vague

A/N: This does have fluff but also some angst. I guess it’s like…both. It’s post-war, after all. Also, I suck at titles. I hope it suits you, Anon! <3

Word Count : 2,763

Warnings: Angst, my adorable boo Draco feeling bad about himself and some possible self-harm triggers, and a slightly suggestive comment. PG

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Comatose-Chapter 16

Summary: You are the sister of Charles Xavier. You are part of the Avengers and dating Bucky Barnes. Unbeknownst to you Bucky is having an affair with Natasha. When you catch them in the act, things go downhill from there. You are a Mutant with similar powers to Jean, only with Immortality thrown in.

Pairings: Bucky x Reader, Bucky X Natasha, Logan Howlett X Reader

Warnings: Angst, Violence, Cheating, Feelings of worthlessness, Depression.


Surfacing gently from the arms of sleep, a light touch skimming up and down your spine, a content grumble piercing the veil of sleep.

“Wake up, darlin’.”

Logan’s deep voice washes over you, and you groan, wanting nothing more than to stay in your cocoon for the rest of the day.

Logan chuckles deeply, nuzzling your neck. “C’mon sleepy head. We gotta get ready. We leave in an hour.”

Mumbling incoherently about the injustice of being woken at such an ungodly hour, you reluctantly get out of bed. Stumbling blindly to the ensuite bathroom, you spy the tight fitting red and black combat suit hanging on a hook on the door. Stepping into the shower, your muscles protesting with a delicious burn that has you flushing, memories of last night flash through your mind. Grinning stupidly, you return to the task at hand wanting nothing more than to get this mission over and go home. With Logan.

Fifteen minutes later, you’re suited up and munching on a cereal bar, trailing behind Logan and Tony as the Iron Man chatters about how he could make some killer gear for Logan. It was a terrifying thought.

“That’s going to be a problem,” Colossus says as he joins you.

You snort. “Oh I know, they could kill us all.”

Kitty giggles, “Oh (y/N) you’re going to have your hands full.”

The conversation is cut off as Steve strides into the room followed by Bucky and Sam. “Everybody ready?” The Captain America persona masks every trace of Steve. He scrutinizes every one of the surrounding faces, seeing nothing but grim determination in every one of them. “Everybody good with the plan?” Again he receives nods all around. “Alright, let’s go.”

Clambering onto the jet, Bucky grabs your arm. He hesitates briefly before he gruffly says, “Be careful.” Emotion swims in his eyes.

Opening your mouth to speak, Logan interrupts. “You comin’, darlin’?” he asks, hard stare boring into Bucky.

“Yeah, I’m coming.” You leave Bucky standing alone, watching you walk away with Logan.

The jet is silent, everyone lost in their own thoughts. The bad feeling causing bile to rise in your throat. You don’t know why you feel this dread, the impending doom settling on you as you close in on the target. You know that something is going to go horribly wrong. You can feel it in every nerve and synapse in your body, screaming at you to turn around. Go home. Regroup.

But you have to, you must, you have no other choice but to save the people around you from Hydra. From destruction. From themselves.

“Descent in 30 seconds,” comes Clint’s voice through the jet.

“Gear up,” Steve commands.

Glancing at Storm you murmur, “We need cover.”

She nods and lifts into the air, eyes going white as she calls upon her power. The Avengers look momentarily stunned, but quickly get back in formation, waiting to jump out of the plane.

“Kitty, grab your group, you need to get in as quickly as you can.” She nods, gives you a light squeeze on the arm, before she grabs Natasha and the others and disappears from view. You turn to Logan and regard him closely, Bucky lingering behind him. “If this goes balls up, get out immediately. Don’t come back for me. I’ll be okay.”

He growls deep in his chest. “Ya know I can’t do that, darlin’,” he replies as he draws you too him, planting a soft kiss on your lips.

“Logan you have to promise me.” Frantically trying to get him to understand, he merely shakes his head, making his way to jump out of the jet.

“I’ll see ya on the other side,” he yells as he jumps.

“He’s right ya know.” Bucky’s voice startling you out of your chaotic thoughts. “We will always come back for ya,” he murmurs.

“Bucky….” you begin.

He cuts you off by grabbing your face in his hands, and planting a gentle kiss on your forehead before he joins the others in jumping out the out the plane.


 Fuck! you scream internally.It’s a mess. There are too many. You are vastly outnumbered. Your team taking hits, Logan is fighting off several men at once, Bucky providing backup. Retreat! You scream at them mentally. Get out now! No one’s listening, your cries falling on deaf ears. Steve get them out!  Five seconds later you hear the order coming over the com’s. The team scrambles to get back to the jet. Tony, Sam and Vision covering them while the rest run. You stride forward, putting up a barrier between the oncoming death squad and the people you care about. Taking a deep, steadying breath, ignoring the panicked screaming of Logan as he tries desperately to break through the barrier you had created. He throws himself bodily against the invisible shield, his anguished cries grating against your heart, breaking with every garbled word out of his mouth. You mouth, “I love you,” as he sinks to his knees, defeated. You gather every ounce of power you have, hovering a few feet off the ground, and let the darkness that’s been slowly consuming you over the past months out. It flows and crackles across your skin, destroying everything in its path. Agents disintegrate under the heat of it. Weapons explode in a ball of fire. Buildings seem to shift brick by brick as you let everything you have been holding in out.Control slips entirely as you laugh with the joy of it. The freedom that comes with not holding back. Setting yourself back on the ground, you know you have mere seconds before this all blows up in your face. You need to get out and quickly. You may be immortal but you aren’t invulnerable. Whirling around, ready to make a break for the retreating jet, you see an anguished Logan being bodily thrown into the plane by Colossus. But Steve is screaming for Bucky who seems to be missing. You scan the area quickly. A low moan comes from your right. Bucky is largely covered with debris, his leg bent at an unnatural angle. You run toward him, flinging the debris off him. “You gotta get up, soldier!” you practically scream. He barely registers your presence. The world around you goes quiet. A silent vacuum, a low, “Wooomph,” reaching your ears. You know you’re too late. Things are about to go from bad to worse and Bucky is in no position to help himself. You straddle his hips, planting your feet firmly in the soil on either side of you. Tears are streaming down your face. It’s going to hurt. You don’t know if you are going to make it out of this one, but saving Logan? Saving Bucky? You would die a thousand deaths over and over if it meant they were safe. You hear the oncoming explosion before the flames engulf you. Extending a shield around Bucky to protect him from the blast, you can feel the flesh being ripped off your bones. Flames burn away your clothing. The stench of burning flesh hanging heavy in the air. Pieces of rebar and stones embed themselves in you as you scream out your pain. It’s an inhuman sound. Hold on, just hold on! You repeat in your head as your body starts to fail. You’re going into shock, but you can’t give up. You can’t stop. Bucky stares up at you, grief plain in his eyes as he watches you burn. He can do nothing to help you. He’s stuck watching you die. In agony. Saving him. It’s over as quickly as it began. You slump forward. Numb is all you feel, then, suddenly, you’re burning. On fire. Nothing left to give, nothing left to say, you let the darkness take you as Bucky wails underneath you. 

Tags: You may scream at me. I can take it

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Powerful Chakra Meditation

This is a meditation I made that I found to be extremely deep and powerful. Use it when you feel you need some balance or beneficial energy in your life, or just need to sit and meditate in general. It is also good for opening the third-eye. I find that this meditation gives many sensations which can be pretty intense, so don’t be alarmed if you feel things very strongly. Just relax, go with it, and you’ll be ok. You’ll need about a half-hour for this procedure.

1. Sit in a comfortable position (preferably cross-legged) and keep your back straight, with your chin tilted slightly downward. Put your hands in your lap with the palms facing up, with right over left for females, and left over right for males.

2. Take a few minutes to breathe deeply and relax your muscles. Gradually slow your heartbeat down, and begin to clear yor mind. Block out the surrounding world, and focus on your breathing. Focus on the present. Begin breathing more slowly and deeply, in through the nose, out through the mouth. Close your eyes.

3. Gently bring your attention to the root chakra, located near the privates. Visualize this chakra as a red, swirling point of energy or light. Try to breathe ‘into’  and ‘out of’ this point, directing your breath to the location. As you inhale, imagine clean, beneficial energy entering the chakra, making it brighter and more vivid. This should look something like when an ember from a fire is blown on and it glows. As you exhale, imagine any unhelpful or unclean energy leaving and dissipating, again making the chakra more bright and vivid. Feel this energy exchange as you do it. After repeating for as long as you feel is necessary, move to the next chakra.

4. Continue this process for each chakra, all the way up to the crown. As you move up, you may feel a sense of your conciousness ‘changing shape’. You may also feel vibrations in certain parts of the body (especially the crown), feel numbness and tingling in the face and limbs, see flashes or swirls of light, have a floating or disconnected sensation, or hear ringing in the ears.I find that these start to get very intense at throat chakra, and reach its peak at the crown. Remember that this is normal and will not harm you in any way.

5. When you finish the crown chakra, take a minute to just breathe and prepare for the next step. When ready, imagine a stream of white or pearly light going from the crown chakra all the way down to the root chakra. Feel and see this energy hit each point as it travels down.

6. When the stream of light reaches the bottom, imagine it climbing its way back up starting from the root chakra. Go slow this time, and really feel it work its way back up to the crown. Imagine it reaching and filling each chakra as it goes along. Tune into the vibrations it gives each chakra.

7. When you reach the crown, imagine that stream of light going up and out into the universe in rays. Feel it open up and spread out above you, connecting you to the universe and its knowledge, strengths and vibrations.

8. Take a couple minutes to just breathe deeply. Relax your muscles, and begin to regain awareness of the world around you. Ground yourself and start to move your fingers and toes. Seperate your hands, put them on your lap, then gently open your eyes. The meditation is now finished.

Image from Google image search.

corrupt pt. 1 - dirtycop!jaebum

moodboard by me

wordcount: 2,700

Finding out your brother was a dirty cop was hard enough, but trying to deny his even dirtier partners effect on you was even harder.

warnings: illegal activities, swearing

The rain was relentless. You shivered violently, wrapping your arms around yourself in a feeble attempt to conserve the heat rapidly exiting your body as the downpour soaked through all the layers of your clothing.  

The rain streamed down your face and blurred your vision, making your perspective of the world something similar to a Monet painting. You knew the shivering wasn’t due to the cold, fear had numbed you to the presently unforgiving outside elements, you knew you were quaking in terror.

You stood in a deadly triangle, Jaebum pointing the sleek silver of his handgun towards your prone forehead, Yugeom having the cruel mouth of his own gun directed at Jaebum’s heart.

‘Y/N, I hope you realize how silly of an idea it was for you to follow us here, hmm?’, Jaebum’s stern voice was clear over the roar of the rain.

You nodded, your tears dancing with the rain, running down your cheeks, not being able to look anywhere but on the trigger, which he rested his prone pointer finger on. This was surreal, just a day ago you were struck with the thought that your brother’s recent distant behavior may have been due to him becoming depressed, not a fucking dirty cop with an even dirtier partner.  

You saw the slightest quiver out of the corner of your eyes; Yugeom was struggling to point the gun towards his partner. When he first started he would go on and on about how much he admired his elder, how cool Jaebum was, how much he’d be able to learn about being a detective from Jaebum. You hadn’t seen that vibrant glint in your baby brother’s eyes for a long, long time, the last time he seemed so passionate from something was when he became a police officer, but that was years ago, your brother had changed.

——————

Earlier today you decided you wanted to talk to him, but you were aware he worked long hours, what harm could be done if you dropped by the police station and had a quick word to check in and see if he was fine?

The lights of a vibrant city were just beginning to blink on sporadically as you approached the station. Coincidentally, as you rounded the street corner and stepped on the first of four steps up to the glass sliding door with an emblem on the middle, Yugeom was walking out of those same doors.

You smiled at him brightly and nodded to the man directly behind him, his partner in fighting crime, Jaebum. Yugeom’s eyebrows rose, nearly lost in the hair that fell across his forehead stylishly.

‘Y/N, why are you here’ he said nervously as Jaebum stepped around him and continued on down the road, you thought he almost expected your younger brother to follow him. You were just as shocked at the neither warm nor particularly icy reception he gave you, as shocked as he was to see you.

‘I just came to check if you were alright’, Jaebum was quickly disappearing down the street, Yugeom turning his head every few seconds, obviously agitated his partner was traveling further away from him.

He didn’t want to speak to you, the thought made your head drop down, your chin hitting your sternum. ‘But if you need to leave, we can talk later’ you quickly continued on, trying to sound as upbeat as possible at Yugeoms lack of enthusiasm.

He gave you a sad smile, ‘I’ll call you tomorrow at around lunch time and we can chat then, but now I gotta go, duty calls!’ he said, not even finishing that sentence before he was running off.

You wanted to follow him, wanted to know what was so important his rude ass of a partner couldn’t even stop and wait for your brother to finish talking to you. What was so important your brother couldn’t even give you a hug or a proper hello. So, besides your gut telling you, perhaps you shouldn’t follow the two police officers, you followed the two police officers.

They must have walked through the city for miles because you found yourself ducking behind cargo containers at the shipyard. They stopped at a black one, you crouched, using your arms to brace yourself against a red one two rows behind them. Yugeom produced a key and unlocked the contained, swinging both of the doors open. Jaebum stepped inside, coming out moments later with two large long briefcases in tow, the length of them maybe spanning half of the length of his leg.

They shut and locked the door, walking further down to the waterfront where there was a clearing of just bare concrete that spanned a few meters before a short drop to the ocean. That’s when the first drops of rain began to fall; the drops made trails down your face and ran their chilly fingers down your back. Yet, you were intrigued now, so you pushed on, following them until you stopped at the closest container to the clearing. You made sure you crouched in a shadow, giving them still the slimmest chance to see you, but allowing you relative safety to snoop.

Another man stood there with Jaebum and Yugeom, indicating toward the older police officers hands. He nodded and opened the large briefcase to show an array of guns, each different sized arranged neatly in different compartments but all deadly, you gasped in shock. As you were watching the trade happening, money being put in JB’s hand whilst he handed over the case a pair of strong arms circled your chest and pulled you off the floor so your legs dangled inches from the surface. Fight or flight kicked in as you screamed and struggled everything is brought into laser focus in front of your eyes as you thrashed your head around. The flecks of rust on the container you were hiding behind, the sunspots on your attackers’ arms and the fact you may die. The mysterious man barked something in Chinese and he surged forward into the open. In front of your shocked brother and his bemused partner, who muttered something in Chinese to the man he was trading with. He pulled out a gun and nodded at my captor, who unceremoniously dumped me on the ground and escaped with the guns.

Jaebums gun was directed at me. I blanched as I stood up slowly, his guns position on my forehead moving with me, I couldn’t take my eyes off him. I heard movement to my right and saw out of the corner of my eye that Yugeom had also drawn his gun and it had its gaze on Jaebum.  

—————

‘She’ll keep her mouth shut’ he pleaded, you could imagine the look on his face right now. His eyes slightly squinted, head coming forward whilst his shoulders tilted up a bit, you remember when you had just learned to drive, this was the look you always got from him when he wanted you to taxi him somewhere.

‘How do you know that?’ he snapped back at the younger man, thrusting his gun out to clarify his murderous intentions, his eyes filling with an inhuman rage. You didn’t know Jaebum very well but you had previously thought he was okay. He attended a few family dinners at the beginning of him and Yugeoms partnership when Yugeom had first become a detective. You had even been to a few staff parties where you two had shared some witty banter. This was a side of Jaebum you never knew existed.

‘She’s my goddamn sister JB! I assure you’ His voice went a few octaves lower and his eyes grew darker, ‘I will step out of line if you even touch a hair on her head’ he laughed humorlessly, ‘We’re cops as well, it’s not like the higher-ups will believe her over us, think rationally’ he used his other hand to point to his temple, ‘she’s my closest family’

In response, a sick smile found it’s way onto JB’s annoyingly handsome face, ‘I know exactly what we can do to ensure she won’t tell anyone’ he said, shifting his weight from one leg to another, lowering his gun for half a second. This was my chance, you thought to yourself; you would run to a nearby container and hide behind it as you called the police.

That thought was forced out of your head as he raised his gun again and strolled towards you, putting his other hand casually in his trouser pocket. He circled you, much like a predator circling his prey and ended up directly behind you, so close you could feel his nose skim the corner of your ear as he took a breath in.

You could hear the smile in his voice as he breathed in your ear, ‘just as long as you remain silent…anything you say can and will be used against you’ there was a pause and you took in a breath in response to what he said next, ‘along with perhaps a whip, or some hog ties, so I advise keeping that pretty mouth shut, understood?’, he trailed his hand along your jawline for effect and a different chill ran down your spine. Letting out a shaky breath, you replied with a clipped, ‘yes, understood’.  

He finally moved away to Yugeom and stood beside him, crossing his strong-looking arms across his chest, ‘It looks like we have a new helper Yugie’. Your brother rolled his eyes and scoffed, ‘You don’t honestly think I would agree to drag my sister into this, do you, Jae?’. The older man raised a single eyebrow, ‘Unless you want her pretty little head to remain on her body, yes. Let’s go’.

A sick look overtook both you and your brothers’ faces and you both quickly scuttled after him, putty in his hands. You refused to look at your brother, you hadn’t had time to reflect on your brother’s hand in this, this…you didn’t even know what to call it, this corruption? Yet, you thought he was better than that.

‘Im sorry’ a sullen voice suddenly said beside you as you passed massive container after massive container. ‘Sorry doesn’t unbreak the law’ you spat out under your breath, being careful the man leading you two away from the scene of the crime didn’t hear you berate your brother.

Yugeom grabbed your arm, effectively stopping you, ‘you shouldn’t have…’ you immediately yanked your arm out of his grasp and continued on walking, not willing to get into Jaebum’s bad any more than you already were by not following his orders to follow him. ‘I shouldn’t have what?’ and laughed ironically and swiped the soaking hair that was flopping into your face. ‘I shouldn’t have been concerned about the little brother I adored not contacting me recently?’ you hair was falling into your face again you smoothed it violently against the top of your scalp with a frustrated huff.

You walked closer to Yugeom, who looked remorseful, thank god he had remorse and wasn’t like his partner. ‘You are the one who is in the wrong here, Yugeom’ you said with as much venom you could muster with a whisper, ‘Apologies for giving a shit, I am so sorry brother’. As you spat the last word you stormed ahead of him to where Jaebum was waiting at his car, leaning on it casually. He pulled out a cigarette and lit the tip, the stick begins to glow a steady orange when he took his first deep drag, sliding the lighter back into his black jeans’ front pocket.

The front lights of a silver Mercedes sedan behind Jaebum’s Lexus flashed for a second indicating it as being unlocked, you knew Yugie could never afford this with what he was supposed to be earning. Something else also didn’t ring right, ‘You guy’s walked here, right?’, Yugeom drifted past you to his car, ‘they didn’t only pay us in money’ he said offhandedly as he rounded the shiny new car and opened the passenger door. Despite the deep, sinking, dirty feeling you had. You went to follow your brother but Jaebum made a disapproving noise, which caused you to stop and peer at him. You let out a silent ‘huff’, you were eager to get out of the rain.

A sick smile found it’s way onto Jaebum’s annoyingly handsome face as he threw his finished cigarette, opening his passenger door with a flourish, you’re hopping in with me dear, you need to convince me you won’t be telling anyone about tonight’s happening’s’. You looked over at Yugeom but he was already in his car and you couldn’t see through the tinted windows. Completely defeated you knew you had to get into the man’s car.

Slowly but steadily, you made your way to Jaebums car, brushing past him and getting a good whiff of his intoxicating, woody, scent. When you were safely seated in the new smelling car, he slammed the door behind you, making you jump. Half a second later he was in the driver’s seat, starting the cars’ engine and pulling away.

When you were on the freeway, speeding towards god-knows-where, you felt a warm hand on the middle of your thigh. Your head shot to Jaebum, seeing he was smiling to himself, eyes on the road. ‘You’re really gonna need to show me how sorry you are and how much you want to make it up to me’. He said, turning his head to leer at you, whilst his hand traveled up your thigh, getting dangerously close to a very private area.

Why did you want him to move those few inches further?


THANK YOU FOR READING XXXXX

I wrote a thing because apparently I like to break my own heart. Also, I know Yousef messaged Sana before she accepted his request, so he’d still be able to message her after she deleted him but the idea he couldn’t makes it hurt more. So obvs that’s what I went for. <3 


Send failed. You don’t have permission to chat with this person.

Yousef read the words over not once, not twice but at least three times. It was after the second time that he went on to Sana’s profile to check the status of their friendship. Even after seeing the button had returned to ‘Add Friend’, Yousef went back to read the message again.

Send failed. You don’t have permission to chat with this person.

All at once the blood in Yousef’s veins ran cold. Sana had deleted him. Actually deleted him.

Keep reading

Surely Straight

Request fill for someone who wanted a boy turning into a pregnant girl. Enjoy!

Your name was Elias and you were definitely the most effeminate boys in your school. Not that you did it on purpose, no… That’s just who you were. You didn’t do a thing at all to appear more or less girly, you just supposed that maybe it was in your features. You had a slim torso, “boy” hips, and a pleasantly smiling resting face. Maybe society just thinks girls are the only people who smile. Your mannerisms seemed girlish, too. You weren’t like the other boys who roared when they laughed, made lifting look easy, or generally gruff overall. You had a polite polish to your soul.

That never bothered you very much. You still had your friends, and they never poked fun. As long as you had them, especially your best friend, Jordan, around, you could take the teasing from the “jockstraps”, as you called them. So you thought…

Jordan was throwing a party to carry out the events of homecoming, so where else would you be but there? It was fun and all; you had a great time playing truth or dare and other typical party games. Nothing of it held any significance to you until everyone had left. It was you and Jordan.

“Hey, thanks for sticking around to clean up, Eli.”

“No problem,” you responded, putting a hand on your hip, “I’m spending the night aren’t I?”

Jordan chuckled, and probably blushed too, but you ignored that. “So that’s a requirement now, huh? Help me clean up house before you can crash without paying rent? I mean, I’m not complaining.” You shook your head at his jests while putting a couple of empty two-liters in the recycling.

Before long, you and he were finally able to kick your feet up in a reclining love seat in his spacious basement. The bond between you was strong enough that words didn’t have to be exchanged as you sat watching Elle Woods struggle through Harvard. You didn’t know it, but Jordan was reading the situation differently.  You pretended to ignore the strong arm that wrapped itself around your shoulder.

Jordan coughed as the credits rolled, “This is probably really bad, y’know?” You gave him a confused look. “I mean, we just watched Legally Blonde, and I’m about to confess how madly in love I am with you.”

Your brows furrowed. “You’re joking, right?”

Your friend’s face reddened, “Well, I just realized my bisexuality, and you’re already gay, and very cute as well.” He took a breath, “I’m sorry, this isn’t romantic at all, is it…”

You hardly heard a word that left his mouth. “You’re already gay…” It stung your ears and pierced your heart. Suddenly, you pushed away the arm that held you close. “You’re no different!”

“What?”

“You’re just like them! You see a short, skinny… twink! All of you do!” You snapped at him as you sprang up from the couch.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t-” Jordan tried to explain, but you turned your back and headed for the door. You tried blocking out his voice by stamping on each stair as you made your way to the front door, jingling your keys purposely as you tore them from the hook, and slamming the front door as hard as you could. But you still heard his comments in the confines of your mind. “You’re already gay…”

Tears had been stinging your pores the entire drive home. You couldn’t believe it! Your best friend had been projecting a happy little gay boy onto you this entire time! “I’m straight, dammit!” You cursed under your breath as you brought a warm washcloth to your face.

You laid the sopping cloth down and stared hard into the mirror. “I’m straight.” You made eye contact with your blotchy faced, puffy eyed reflection. Taking deep breaths in and out, you repeated your mantra. “I’m straight. I’m straight. I’m straight.” Good thing your parents were away for business, or else you would have no alibi to explain this self affirmation at 2 AM.

Finally feeling bored of your little game, you decided to go to bed. Or at least sleep, because you didn’t quite make it to your room at all, rather settling for sinking to your knees at the bathroom vanity.

Sleep was unsuccessful. It felt deep, but when you woke, the bright glare of your phone let you knew that only an hour passed. “Dammit…” you sighed and got into a comfier position sitting on your butt on the magenta rug near the tub with your arms wrapped around your bent knees, resting your head on the lip. You had never felt more drained. Nothing seemed more interesting than the ceiling at the moment.

How long had you been there? Long enough for your butt to start going numb, probably. And it was, and you dismissed it until that warm, maybe a little bit itchy feeling spread to your stomach. Then your legs, arms, hands, feet, face… everything inbetween. “What in the..?” You took off your shirt to inspect for any possible rash, but you found none. Instead, it looked like the blonde hairs on your chest seemed to grow lighter and fade away. Was it a trick of the light? You weren’t sure until you caressed the nearly bare skin of your torso. Skin so soft, it almost distracted you until a dull ache was felt all over your body, tearing you out of your grogginess. Your body was changing and you didn’t know why.

You stood on your feet and rushed to the mirror. Any hints of facial hair was gone, and your boyish frame was smoothing out. Any bony knuckles or joints rounded out, and your figure began to take an hourglass shape. You also observed your cheekbones lifting, your nose thinning, eyebrows becoming thinner, and your eyes becoming bigger. You were horrified, of course, but this transformation, however you may wanted to deny it, was exciting you. The warm feeling that tickled your core was something you never wanted to stop.

Your structures settled, but the feeling didn’t leave, and you knew this wasn’t finished. Fat began to redistribute itself, even if you didn’t have much to begin with. You watched your thighs curve out with fascination. Your butt began to take a more noticeable shape, and you could definitely tell because your fingers were starting to spread as you had wanted to feel this blossoming ass. Your ass. You didn’t move them until you noticed the heat starting to pool at your breasts, turning toned pecs into cute, tender titties. You laughed as you played with them, losing all of your pride and giving into whatever joy this might be.

You began to feel excitement as the sensation traveled south, and you took your pants off with glee. Your erect penis was already shrinking, so you hastily placed your thin, feminine hands around it. Masturbation had never felt so good, and you could hardly contain your moans. It didn’t last as long as you would have liked, but you became aware of new possibilities. Unclasping your hand, you stroked your fingers down your new sex, finding pleasure at your clit. You rubbed it feverishly, struggling to stay standing. You collapsed on your knees, uncaring of the future bruise, and slid two fingers inside your wet vagina. It felt awkward at first, but shifting your mind to lewd thoughts and ignoring the odd angle your wrist was at made the pumping motions even more exciting than any handjob you had ever given yourself. The sensation was nothing you had ever experienced, the euphoria wiping away any last thought of what happened last night. You kept going at it until finally you felt release.

Standing up and feeling better than ever, you washed your hands and left the bathroom to find a cute, frilly dress you had formerly worn to pleasure yourself in. The idea was good, of course, but you figured you may as well just look the part. Afterall, you just had the best experience yet.

You were fishing for a hair tie to put your now long blonde hair into a pony when your stomach began to feel tight. You glanced in the mirror, wondering what could happen now. This new feeling wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t the fantastic one you felt before. Nothing looked different, so you shrugged it off and returned to your search. Finally finding it in the medicine cabinet, you pushed the mirror panel shut and saw a new pudge to your tummy that wasn’t there before. You placed the hair tie down and turned to the side, sliding a hand down your torso. You might have dismissed it if your boobs hadn’t gotten noticeably bigger as well.

“No…” you whispered as the pressure in your womb began to roar, and your belly consequently swelled. You tried pushing the weight gain back in, but felt a firm resistance. Your face flushed as your breasts tried to compete, filling with milk to feed the baby when it comes. You could do nothing as your belly pushed outward, stretching the fabric of your dress thin. You figured you may have hit the five month benchmark, or at least you looked to be a woman 20 weeks pregnant. “Hard to hide…” you mumbled as you gave your swollen belly a much needed rub.

You jumped as you heard the doorknob turn, and jumped higher as you saw Jordan standing in the doorway. “Ellie, are you alright?” He looked frightened as you held your stomach protectively and away from him.

Your glare softened as a wave of affection washed over you. “Yeah, I’m… I’m fine…” You still had a hand on your belly, but it now instead was simply resting on the taut surface as you turned to face your boyfriend. “I’m ok.” Boyfriend?

“I’m glad.” He smiled handsomely and placed his hand on top of your own. “Now, you need to kick your feet up!” He laughed as he picked you up bridal style and carried you out of the bathroom, and into his basement. “You struggle enough with those jocks teasing you at school, especially with this unplanned arrangement,” he patted your tummy as he sat you on the same loveseat you could have sworn you left a few hours ago. “But let me know if there’s anything I can do for you, Ellie.”

You laughed, “Haven’t you done enough already?” He held you close, and you liked it. You liked him. You loved him. And then it hit you: you’re straight.

Heck, I wrote something. Maybe I’ll write more. You can call me Motown :))))

anonymous asked:

Jumin

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life 

hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang

hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff

best quality: People joke that he’s “Daddy Jumin”, but I honestly think he really is the dad of the RFA. Like Seven, he keeps a watchful eye on the other members, although Jumin is least likely to take direct action unless he knows it’s appropriate (or when V tells him to.) But when he takes action, holy shit does he take action He sends way too many bodygaurds to all the RFA when there’s a threat, and he had the balls to actually contact Yoosung’s mom because he was genuinely concerned for the boy’s failing school life. He even said it himself: as the oldest of the group, it’s his job to look after them.       

I also like that he’s not entirely the stereotypical uptight, rich character that can be seen in some anime/manga. Like always being the 100% serious and condescending one that no one in the group can really get along with. He’s just as much of a dork as the rest of them (he actually keeps tracks of how much Elizabeth the 3rd sheds and fucking means it), isn’t embarassed about what makes him a dork, has good relationships with other characters, and has much more of a range of emotions than even he may realize. It’s kind of hard to explain, but compared to other male characters that share many similar traits with Jumin, it doesn’t feel like you have to work hard to “earn” Jumin’s love (or even just his friendship) like you would have to with them. You just need to talk to him and prove trustworthy. And I liked that. 

And his 1st bad end is the funniest of the bad ends. Hell, it’s the least bad out of all of them. You get to throw some wicked shade at Sarah, you end up marrying Jumin, and you end up a high-ranking and respected employee at his company. Seriously, if you didn’t get this end yet you NEED to. Forget his supposedly “kinky” Bad End 2, Bad End 1 is the way to go. 

worst quality: 

Jumin can very much be a jerk. He has a tendency to be insulting or say something backhanded, whether intentional or not. It may be due to lack of more normal social etiquette, but damn does this man lack proper tact.

For example, it’s clear he doesn’t completely understand Zen’s reasoning for not accepting his offers. Not to mention he seems to deliberately ignore the fact that Zen is ALLERGIC TO FUCKING CATS MAN. And he also thinks that simply paying Jaehee a lot of money will make up for putting up with an unsupportive working environment. Of course, when you grow up with a shit ton of money, it may be surprising that not all people value it as much as you think. But still, man, it’s not like Zen and Jaehee are subtle about their situation. 

I also found his route to be rather uncomfortable at times. I personally don’t like feeling like I can’t do anything, nor do I like being told what to do or how to do things.   

I get that Jumin was trying to keep you safe and he absolutely doesn’t want to lose the one person he can actually call “his”, but the way he went about handling the whole situation was overwhelming and I didn’t enjoy it. This is something Jumin acknowledges actually: that he cannot control his emotions properly and is genuinely scared that he’ll hurt you. It’s a nice flaw to have, but it’s still a flaw I wouldn’t be able to handle in MC’s shoes. 

Also his hair is a pain in the ass to draw  

ship them with: Hardcore ship with my Unicorn MC. I swear I’ll post something involving them one day (when I can finally tame Jumin’s hair.) 

brotp them with: V is pretty much a given. I love childhood friendships, and I would kill for a canon CG of the two of them as children. 

While I don’t ship them, I do believe a friendship between him and Zen would be so much fun. Zen’s route shows that they can be civil with each other and when they are, they can actually hold a normal conversation. They’d be the kind of bros that’d pick on each other a little, and then laugh about it later. 

It’s my personal headcanon that Jumin actually likes taking care of people much younger than him. So he’s like a real brother to both Yoosung and Zen’s MC, the youngest of the group. 

needs to stay away from: Holy hell. It’s pretty much the same answer for everyone at this point. 

Let’s just go with every woman in his life that has tried to use and exploit the poor man. Especially that one step-mother (or I at least one of his father’s many mistresses) who actually tried to hit on him *shivers.* No wonder this man is emotionally numb to the opposite sex. 

misc. thoughts: With everything about Jumin’s personality, his history with women, and how the other boys treat him (looking at you Zenny)  there’s no denying the fact hat this man is 100% a Virigin. So while I do enjoy reading some of his kinky headcanons like the rest of the fandom, it does bother me how it’s common to exaggerate him as some BDSM, “50 Shades of Gray” daddy when I’m pretty sure next to Yoosung, he’d be the most vanilla when it comes to sex. At least at first. Kinks are something you develop with more experience, after all. 

Don’t deny it, Jumin would be that one lover who needs to do extensive research on sex first and ask not-so-subtle questions to the RFA before he’d be sure he was ready to please his SO for the first time. I now desire to see Jumin go to Zen for sex-ed and tips for bedtime festivities. 

try again {part iii}

masterlist

i. ii.

word count: 1,244

A/N: I may or may not have stayed up all night to write this lolol. I’m sorry for how short this is and also the angst. But I warned that it would be emotional. Get ready, y'all.

I was hanging up all the clothes we had already bought for the baby we were adopting. Lots of unisex clothing hung in the closet because we couldn’t resist buying clothes for her, even before we knew the baby was a girl. When we found out it was a girl, Shawn and I went out on another shopping escapade.

That was only a few weeks after we found out about the baby. Now, we only had seven weeks left until it was time for our daughter to be born. Shawn and I both were working on finishing her room, but neither one of us had enough patience to put anything together. Shawn was currently working to assemble the crib. After I was finished hanging up little onesies and dresses and tutus, I sat down to watch Shawn.

I took the directions out of his hands and began to read them off to him, trying to assist in making his work more hasty. He cursed every time he couldn’t find the right piece, which was quite often and quite entertaining as well. He also didn’t know what many of the pieces and objects even were, which was also amusing.

“Shawn..” I trailed off.

“Yes?” He said, biting his plump lip in concentration and looking oh so gorgeous while doing so.

“That’s backwards..” I informed him.

“Fuck,” he cursed, pursing his lips once he realized that it was indeed backwards. “I give up for today. Let’s finish hanging up decorations.” We both stood up, picking up the little box of framed decor and flower decals to put everywhere.

I started to place the decals on the walls where I thought they looked best. Shawn hung up a framed photo of the baby’s ultrasound pictures we had received in the mail. I was almost finished putting flowers on the walls when Shawn yelped, causing me to jump.

“Jesus, Shawn, was that really necessary?” I asked.

“I hit my finger with the hammer.” He gasped. His nose scrunched up out of pain, but I knew he was over exaggerating slightly, so I laughed at him. We walked to the kitchen so I could make him an ice pack.

“How can such a big guy hurt so much from a bruised finger?” I teased.

“It hurt, Y/N, I promise! You wouldn’t be laughing if it was you.” I rolled my eyes at him while putting ice in a bag. He grinned because we were finally back to our old selves. Without us being so upset over not being able to have a baby, our time together was much more well spent. We were happier, we were us again. My phone begin to ring as it sat on the kitchen counter. Shawn was closest to it so he grabbed it.

“I’ll get it with my uncrippled hand.” He said sarcastically. He picked up the phone with the hand not covered by an ice pack. I stayed silent, trying to hear the conversation, but I couldn’t hear the person on the other end of the line.

“Yes, this is he.”

“Uh huh.”

“Wait, you’re kidding right? You have to be kidding?” His face dropped, his expression went blank for a few moments. He stayed silent, listening to whatever this person was saying.

“Oh, okay. Thank you.”

“No, I’m alright. Goodbye.”

“What, what is it?” I asked, not wasting any time in doing so. Shawn didn’t speak for a moment and I grew antsy. “Shawn, what’s wrong?”

“That was the adoption agency..” he said, his voice going quieter with each word, “The parents-”

“What about the parents?” I interrupted, my heart was pounding and my mouth felt dry. My whole body felt weak, I needed to know. I needed Shawn to tell me.

“The parents decided they want to keep her, they want to keep the baby.” He spoke softly. My heart sank. My whole body felt numb. Tears fell freely down my cheeks, no amount of resistance would be able to hold them back. I attempted to speak but I couldn’t find the words to say. I just stood there, tears running down my face, shaking because I was crying so hard. I had never felt anything this heart breaking in my whole life.

“They what?” I said, just hoping he was lying. I hoped that for some reason, it was just a sick, twisted joke and it wasn’t real.

“Y/N, don’t make me repeat it. You heard what I said.” He said, and that was when I realized Shawn was crying too. My eyes had been too blurred to see his face, so I couldn’t see the tears that were falling down his face as well. They didn’t fall as rapidly as mine, I saw once I could finally see again, but they still fell and Shawn cried like I had never seen him cry before.

Shawn opened his arms up for me and I went to him. I needed his comfort more than anything, just like he needed mine. He engulfed me in his arms and I wrapped my arms around his broad back. I sobbed into his shirt, probably covering it in mascara but it didn’t matter. He rested his head on top of mine. He usually felt strong when he held me, he felt like he was protecting me, but this time, he felt weak. He felt just as weak as I did.

“What did we do wrong? What did we do to make them call off the adoption?” I asked, not really to Shawn, but to myself, with my voice cracking.

“I don’t know,” he said in between sobs.

I had never seen Shawn like this so I knew this was affecting him just as heavily as it was I. We eventually ended up in our bedroom, cuddling up to each other underneath the covers. I rested my head on his chest. The crying finally subsided from the both of us after hours and hours. I looked up at Shawn. His skin was a splotchy red with swollen eyes. His eyelashes stuck together from the wetness of his tears. I didn’t even want to know what my face looked like.

“I’m sorry about your shirt.” I apologized, looking down at his light gray shirt that was now stained with black from my makeup, but I knew Shawn didn’t care. He shook his head, as to say don’t worry about it.

“Let’s go get ready for bed, love. We both need some rest.” He suggested. I stood but still felt weak. We both brushed our teeth then I washed my face and Shawn did the same, as if we were trying to wash away the tears and pain.

We crawled back into bed. The warmth from each other and the blankets couldn’t warm the cold inside my body. I felt cold and empty. I felt shock, anger, sadness, every emotion I could feel. I wondered if Shawn felt the same way. I knew he was hurting like I was, but was he feeling all these different emotions I was feeling? Was he feeling like we were the ones that messed up? That we made the parents not want to give their child to us? He was right next to me, yet I couldn’t bring myself to ask him about all these thoughts and feelings I had. I thought all these things before I fell asleep from the exhaustion of crying.

V3 cast as Traitors

this hurts me to write because I remember the second game traitor :((

IMPORTANT!:  I wrote this as if the reader((y/n))was part of the killing game, and may or may not the the s/o. It’s up to the reader 

this is way too long , so for the anon who asked, imagine is under the cut

Keep reading

Comparison/Theories.

So instead of focusing this post on just one person, I decided to write about Lee, Silver, and Barbara. I’m just gonna warn you, this post is very long, and probably contains a lot of spoilers. It’s your choice whether you read it or not, but don’t get upset with me because I did warn you.

Okay, so I’m gonna start with the facts. These are the things the writers/cast have said directly themselves.

1. “You may have already seen Harley as a person that you thought you had met and known for a long time. So we always reserve the right to sort of do that as well.” - Ken Woodruff

2. “We might see (her) in episode 22.” - John Stephens

3. “The person is somehow connected to the Joker Cult World.”

4. Harley’s appearance in the finale is gonna be crazy. Crazy enough to be the launching point for season four.


Here are some random facts I gathered, that you may or may not already know about Harley:

1. She’s an expert gymnast

2. Her main weapons are a giant mallet, a baseball bat, and sometimes a gun

3. She used to be a psychiatrist

4. She went to Gotham University and graduated top of her class.

5. Her first job was at Arkham Asylum

6. She hates fish

7. And she can’t swim

8. Harley is known to have a crush on Bruce Wayne, even though she loves Joker

9. She is incredibly intelligent (Amanda Waller once stated that she is a genius)

10. She once brought a broken family back together

11. She switches back and forth from good to bad

12. She is schizophrenic

13. One of the voices she hears is her rational side (Dr. Harleen Quinzel)

14. She is bi-sexual

15. Her aliases are Dr. Holly Chance, Dr. Jessica Seaborn, Lee Harkwin, Holly Quinn, Harleen Frances Quinzel, Harriet Shankar, GG Harlin, and Kelvar Vest Girl.

16. Harley has Histrionic Personality Disorder (being flirtatious or seductive, wanting to be the center of attention, provocative clothes, shallow impressionistic speech, dramatic and excessively emotional personal presentation, suggestible by others (gullible), overestimates the intimacy of their social relationships.)

17. She was the only one in her family to graduate from College

18. She’s constantly seeking a sense of identity but doesn’t know how.

19. Her home life was very chaotic

20. Her character is full of conflicting personas.

21. “I loved flushing away the control. The goals. The regiment way of life I’d had. I was finally free. Free to forget. To play for fun. To play crazy.”

22. “The downside of this is that I’ve started to feel numb. In school, they had a name for it: dissociation. My rational mind can recognize pain when I see it. But my rational mind is in a pretty small box.”

23. She has obsession

24. She uses her obsessions to help define herself

25. She likes to cling onto things to help create some sense of self in her mind

26. She uses other people and objects to help define herself.

27. She is a character of passion

28. She is a hopeless romantic (she is weak when it comes to things like vulnerability)

29. She is always trying to figure out who she is, and what her role is in the world.

30. Unlike the Joker, she actually loves people

31. Harley has a strong sense of compassion and loyalty towards the people in her life.

32. As a child, she was heavily abused by her father

33. She has OCD, Histrionic Disorder, Antisocial Disorder (maybe?), Schizophrenia

34. She has this illness where she gets off (it literally turns her on) when her partner does something bad.


Okay so let’s start with Barbara :)

Cons of her being Harley:
1. She never was, nor will she ever be a psychiatrist. That’s a huge part of Harley’s story (pretty much every Harley version was a psychiatrist) and after all the bad crap she’s done, I don’t ever see her being a one. I don’t think they would even let her, even if she wanted to.

2. She’s older than Jerome. Now I don’t really see this as a problem unless they want to stick with Joker being older than Harley.

3. She’s already turned crazy.. she’s supposed to meet Joker first, fall in love with him, then become Harley.

4. Her name is Barbara Kean (an actual character in the comics and I think two Batman movies). She started calling herself Barbara Queen, which Queen sounds similar to Quinn, but her name is still Barbara. There is no way that you can turn the name Barbara into Harley.

5. Harley is known to be extremely loyal to the people in her life. Barbara, on the other hand, will turn on anybody if it’s for her benefit. Including Tabitha, which is probably the closest person to her.

6. Now I have no clue how true this is, but someone on IG said that one of the writers want Harley and Barbara to team up. If this is true, then that would be amazing, and it would mean she isn’t Harley.

Pros:
1. She has the appearance description (blonde hair and blue eyes)

2. She’s switched back and forth from good and bad once

3. She’s really intelligent (She figured out Penguin was the one behind Isabella’s death.)

4. Out of all the girls, she has paralleled Jerome the most

5. She’s openly bisexual

6. She and Jerome already had a partner in crime relationship

7. She coincidentally fell through a glass window, which then put her in a comma.

8. She’s already met Selina and Ivy (she even shared her apartment with Selina for a bit)

9. She calls herself Barbara Queen (which sounds a lot like Quinn)

10. She was at first a kind, caring, selfless, and moral individual. 

11. I think she has schizophrenia, as does Harley.

12. “The downside of this is that I’ve started to feel numb. In School, they had a name for it: dissociation. My rational mind can recognize pain when I see it. But my rational mind is in a pretty small box.” - Harley Quinn

13. “I loved flushing away the control. The goals. The regiment way of life I’d had. I was finally free. Free to forget. To play for fun. To play crazy.” - Harley Quinn

14. She grew up in a bad home, her mom would call her things like ‘her little piggy’.

15. She and Tabby already started a club called The Sirens.

16. She finds it to be passionate when a man hits their woman

17. Jerome can already persuade her

18. “You’re a little pain in the ass.” - Joker SS

19. She and Jerome had a connection the moment she walked into Arkham.

20. She’s basically the only character who laughs as much as Jerome/she’s also basically the only one (besides his cult) who finds him funny (so far)

21. She’s corny

22. We all know she’s crazy

23. She acts violently when upset without thinking

24. Harley is known to obsess over things, Barbara has this down pact. (She was obsessed with Jim, now she’s obsessed with wanting to be queen of the underworld)

25. She’s connected to the Joker Cult World obviously since she and Jerome have already met/interacted.

26. She’s flirty/seductive

27. She manipulates people to her advantage

28. “And right at the end of the season there is going to be a massive development for my character, so it’s going to be really exciting.” - Erin Richards

29. “What we did with Jerome, we basically said, how could we create a city.. or our job is to set Gotham up as a place where Batman is needed one day. And therefore what we did with Jerome, what if a character, took on that same anarchic chaotic sense of chaos that Jerome did, that the Joker did. And set a tone for Gotham. We’re doing the same thing with Barbara as in like if we take her to the very edge of what that character, the sanity of that character, what would emerge afterward. So yeah, we’re gonna explore that.” - Danny Cannon.

30. A fan asked Danny ‘so she maybe is Harley?’ and Danny replied with “I’ll get in so much trouble if I say this.”

31. “There will be a big reveal, so whether it’s that or not, we’ll have to wait and see.” - Erin Richards

32. “She could get a different kind of crazy I think. Like.. there’s a lot of different crazies. So I think we could maybe see her evolve into a different aspect of that.” - Erin Richards

33. Barbara’s ultimate goal is to belong/ find out who she is. (Harley is constantly seeking a sense of identity but she doesn’t know how.) (Harley is always trying to figure out who she is, and what her role is in the world.)

34. Harley uses her obsessions to help define herself (I believe Barbara does the same)

35. Harley likes to cling onto things to help create some sense of self in her mind (I believe Barbara also does this.)

36. Harley uses other people and objects to help define herself. (And this as well)

37. She kind of used one of Harley’s signature weapons (mallet, but it wasn’t giant)

38. “The transformation that’s gonna happen at the end of this season is a big secret. It will involve me reading more comic books.” - Erin Richards

Okay, so a lot of things match up with Barbara. It’s possible that she’s Harley, but that would be a bad move on the show’s part. Not because of age or anything, but because she’s the most obvious choice in my opinion. Also because she already has a very important role in the comics. If she becomes Harley, then that would mean that there will be no Batgirl in this universe. But then I thought of more possibilities. Like, Tabitha (Tigress) is like an older version of Catwoman.. and we all know Selina Kyle is gonna be the future Catwoman. Anyway, Tabitha is kind of like a proto-Catwoman in my opinion. What if they’re making Barbara the proto Harley? I know I’m not making sense, but what if they’re gonna keep Barbara as Barbara Kean still, but make her have these traits so she can be ‘the older version proto Harley’. I hope you all can understand me. Okay, Tabitha is gonna be in a really vulnerable place later into the season, and Selina is gonna be in a very dark place, where she has nowhere else to turn. Tabitha is basically gonna take Selina under her wing, and teach her things. So the proto, older version of Catwoman is gonna be helping the future Catwoman. What if they’re doing the same thing with Barbara? You get what I’m saying? Also, Erin said there is going to be a massive character development for Barbara. Yes, it probably would be a pretty big deal if she was to become Harley.. but it honestly wouldn’t be massive in my opinion. I mean we’ve already seen Barbara act crazy (a lot may I add), and it honestly wouldn’t shock me if she was to become Harley, because hello, it would be so predictable. What I would consider a major character development is if she maybe does something good for once. Like maybe save someone’s life, or changing and becoming a better person. Not saying that’s gonna happen, but that’s what I would consider a major character development. Also if she was to change for the better, maybe she and Jim could get back together and have Barbara Gordon (Batgirl) and their son James Gordon Jr. It would also make sense her having this mental instability because their son turns out being a sociopath. This would mean he got it from his mother genetically. Like I said, this probably won’t happen, but it would make more sense than them making her Harley. Also, who knows, maybe Barbara herself will become batgirl. I could see it happening because of these tweets 


Leslie Thompkins :)

Cons:
1. Like Barbara, age. Like I said I don’t think age really matters. Especially since Jerome is the one coming onto the older women. The only way it would matter is if they’re sticking with Joker being older than Harley.

2. Not sure how accurate this is, but someone said that Lee is gonna do something really bad, and this something is gonna bring her and Jim together again.

3. She’s an actual character in the comics (as are Barbara, and Silver.)

4. She doesn’t have blonde hair, nor blue eyes (she’s still beyond beautiful though)

Pros:
1. Harley is known to have a sister (when she has Lucy, her sister takes care of her for Harley.) Lee mentions having a sister (in Jerome’s episode may I add) whose recipe she used.

2. Her nickname is Lee, which could easily be turned into Harley or Harleen. Her name is literally in the word Harley (Harlee; Also Harleen)

3. She is around the age of Grace Fairchild (one of the ogre’s victims) so my guess is she’s either in her early or mid-twenties. This would mean she’s actually not that much older than Jerome.

4. Lee Calvi is an alias for her and turns out Harley has an alias as Lee Harkwin

5. She was there when Jerome was first introduced

6. Jerome’s entire case fascinated her (this was Jim leading her to the interrogation room)

7. His case was the first, and only case where she went into the interrogation room with Jim.

8. She’s the only woman who has really been able to touch him, (She held and comforted him when they found his mother’s body, not to mention all the times he touched her, like at the gala, or when he was reborn and took her hostage.)

Bonus: “Everyone else sees the Joker laugh, but only Harley has ever seen him cry.” - Arleen Sorkin (He was faking, but still)

9. She worked at Arkham and could easily go back.

10. Jerome has both saved, and spared her life

11. She’s a doctor (she studied trauma but it’s not her area of focus) 

12. Though it’s not her area of focus, she still basically counseled Barbara and Bruce. She also gives a lot of psychiatric advice.. examples: 


(Lee: The way people, look at you. See you differently. You treat it like it’s a burden. You could be a source of pride or happiness even. 

Jim: Thank you doctor, same time next week. 

Lee: Don’t tempt me. I can psychoanalyze the heck out of you. But I’m gonna resist the urge.)


(Lee: You need to get some trauma counseling. 

Barbara: Doc, I’m happy. I’m happy to be alive. Which is why, Jim, I didn’t want to leave without saying thank you properly. Thank you for saving my life. 

Jim: I was glad to do it. 

Lee: Ms. Kean, trauma counseling, like yesterday. I have several recommendations for you. 

Barbara: Really, Doc, I’m fine.

Lee: You’re not fine. After what you’ve been through nobody would be fine. 

Barbara: Fine, if you will be my counselor. Why don’t we do it at my place.

Lee: No. I have some trauma training, but it’s not my area of focus.

Barbara: I like you. Okay, I can talk to you. Please?

Lee: Okay. Deal.)


(Lee: You were violently abducted. You nearly died. You must have been very scared. It’s normal to feel trauma. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.)

 


13. She can be corny, sassy, and sarcastic

14. She’s very intelligent (she and Harley both have intelligence listed as one of their abilities)

15. She’s tougher than she looks

16. The writers themselves said that Lee was nuts.

17. Lee is gonna be affected by the Alice Tetch Virus. Jim is gonna be fighting that while also fighting for Lee.

18. She’s becoming way darker  

19. Lee and Jim finally had sex, but guess when they did it? After Jerome’s interrogation. They had been hinting at it for a bit but she would put it off because of work, and then because she got interested in the case.. while in the interrogation room you could tell that she was fascinated with Jerome and you could even see her smirk a little a few times. Then once the interrogation was over she talked about how it was ugly but thrilling, and then suggested for them to ‘go home’. Then they, ya’ know. But all of this after she watched Jerome. Makes you wonder if he turned her on. Not to mention that Harley actually has this illness where she gets turned on by her partner doing bad things.

Lee: Truly. It was ugly, but it was also kind of thrilling.
Jim: Thrilling?
Lee: Thrilling and scary. Like.. like looking down a deep, dark tunnel. Thanks for letting me be there.

20. Out of everyone Jerome came in contact with in ‘smile like you mean it‘ episode, she’s the only one he didn’t kill.

21. She was also the first person he had a casual conversation with since he was brought back to life.

22. Jerome obviously is attracted to her (and she is attracted to him as well) I mean.. 

Not only is his tongue so close to her face, but if you look closely you can see she feels his bicep. 

And here she gently places her hand on top of his.

23. She wasn’t even scared of Jerome. I honestly don’t think she’s ever been scared of him. Just my opinion. He’s literally holding a gun to her and she doesn’t care

24. She’s the only one Jerome calls ‘doc’ (Joker calls Harley doctor a lot)

25. Lee was playing along with Jerome, kind of just putting up with him (Harley’s the only one who puts up with Joker’s crap)

26. She’s met Selina (they were playful and got along. “You’re cute.. for a doctor.” “Thanks, you’re cute.. for a gangster.”

27. She tends to get overly enthusiastic about things; Harley is known to be passionate (and obsessed) about things.)

28. She was present during it all. She was there when Jerome was first introduced, when they found his mother (she held and comforted him), when Paul gave them the message from ‘Lilah beyond the grave’, when the weapon was found, when Jim interrogated Jerome and his true nature showed, and when Jerome first woke up after being reborn.

29. Plus she was the one Jerome and Barbara took hostage at the gala.

30. She somehow has managed to be present during most, if not all of his most important scenes.. (the writers chose to have her present during all these scenes. They control every single thing that happens on the show.)

31. “Don’t let your hatred of me turn you into something you’re not”

32. “I wish I could do that.”

33. “There is going to be a huge development in Lee Thompkins storyline which affects Jim.“ - Erin Richards

34. Lee is affected by the Alice Tetch Virus.

35. If I remember correctly, Harley (Harleen) doesn’t become crazy until after she meets the Joker and falls in love with him. We haven’t seen Lee’s crazy side yet, but that doesn’t mean we won’t soon.

36. Similarities

37. Look at how they interact/ look at each other

They both have a certain look when they look at each other. Like Lee is trying to put up a tough demeanor, but when she looks at him you literally see her eyes soften. It looks somewhat harsh because she’s trying to act tough, but you can also see desire. Jerome’s eyes soften too. I haven’t seen either of the two look at anybody else like that. Actions speak louder than words.

38. What was the point in him asking that? He probably wanted to know for personal reasons :) 

39. Harley was serious and a little uptight at first when she interacted with the joker, kind of like Lee. 

She has quite a lot of things in common with Harley, and she fits the most when it comes to Harley’s origin. She’s a doctor who studied trauma (even though it’s not her area of focus), her nickname is Lee, she’s incredibly intelligent, etc. In my opinion, Lee or Silver would be the best choice. Plus her and Jerome definitely have the chemistry, she’s connected to the Joker Cult World (she’s met and interacted with Jerome, aka Joker), She’s a character we’ve known for quite a while, and she’s definitely going down this really dark path due to the Virus. She would be the person people would least expect.. in my opinion anyway. I’m thinking either she’s gonna get rid of the virus, and still become Harley because she likes how it feels to be free, or maybe she will get rid of the virus and decide to go work at Arkham again. She’s already basically counseled Bruce and Barbara, so maybe she will go back and work as a psychiatrist. I don’t know, probably not.


Silver St. Cloud :)

Cons:
1. Silver’s favorite animal is a dolphin (Harley hates fish.. but maybe she just means eating fish)

2. She once went swimming with a dolphin. But the issue is Harley can’t swim

3. She has blonde hair, but instead of blue eyes, they’re brown.

4. She’s also her own character in the comics

Pros:
1. If they were to stick with the Joker being older than Harley, then she would fit best

2. Harley is known to have a crush on Bruce Wayne. Silver has feelings for Bruce, and their relationship is rocky now due to what all happened.

3. As far as we know Silver had good parents. But when her father died she became the ward of Theo Galavan. Harley’s father was a criminal that used to abuse her. Theo is technically her guardian, and he abuses her.. so I believe this can still apply.

4. She did everything Theo asked of her, because she was scared of him, and she didn’t want to be outcast from the family. So if she did everything she did out of fear, imagine what all she would do out of love.

5. She is very gullible

6. She is a master manipulator

7. Though she and Jerome haven’t met yet, she is still connected to the Joker Cult World, because she was working for Theo as was Jerome.

8. She can be incredibly loyal

9. She was pushed out of a window by Tabitha when they were trying to escape Theo.

10. She is a hopeless romantic

12. Jessica was talking about ‘The Sirens Club’ is gonna have new people join, but she couldn’t say much about it. I believe Silver is gonna come back, and she will be one of the new members.

13. Out of all the choices, she has the advantage point. We know Barbara owned an art gallery, and Lee is a doctor, but Silver is still young and doesn’t have a career yet. So if she does turn out to be Harley, she still has a chance to either be an intern or become a psychiatrist and meet Jerome the right way.

14. Silver isn’t a bad person, people hate her because she got between BatCat and because she manipulated Bruce. I just wanna remind everyone that the only reason she did those things was because Theo would have killed her or cast her out of the family. So she’s not all bad

15. “Am I Harley? *whispers* You’ll have to wait and see.” - Natalie Alyn Lind on IG live

16. She and Jerome both acted innocent at first, before they revealed their true nature

17. She always had to work for Theo, so we never really saw her have fun. We also didn’t see her crazy side yet, but once again that doesn’t mean we won’t. Especially now that she’s free from Theo. I can see this apply to her as well.

18. “Little Minx”

19. “You can’t even imagine the things I’ve done. There’s no hope. There’s no going back to normal life.”

20. Natalie and Cameron met at Vanity Fair and took some playful pictures together. One was of the two just smiling, and the other was them acting like she punched him. She captioned the pictures ‘ Jerome and Silver takeover’.

21. Natalie is gonna be 18 this June, so she will be of age (she can be with both Jerome and Ivy on the show legally) I have no clue what her age is on the show, but I would say around 15 or 16. Maybe even 17?

22. Silver was introduced the very next episode after Jerome’s death.


So Silver and Lee are sticking out to me the most. I honestly think Silver has the biggest advantage out of everyone else. Simply because we don’t know what happened to her after she and Tabitha escaped Theo. Tabitha came back.. so why didn’t Silver? I have a theory on this as well. Tabitha cared enough about Silver to save her from Theo, and she was always kind of protective of her. What if Tabitha sent Silver somewhere so she could be safe. For one to keep her safe from Theo, and two because Tabitha lives a sort of dangerous life.  I honestly feel like she sent Silver somewhere that she could be safe and have a normal teenage life. But maybe something happens, and Silver comes back and is under Tabby’s care. If she was to come back, she would more than likely join the sirens. Considering she and Tabitha are family.. Jessica said a few more girls will be joining the Sirens, but she couldn’t talk much about it. We all know the original Sirens (in the comics) include Poison Ivy, Catwoman, and Harley Quinn. Well this  would be the same case, but Babs and Tabs will be in it as well. Silver could be doing anything right now. She could be studying criminology (she definitely has the motive) or interning or anything. With Silver as Harley, they could do so much. Like, make her be studying criminology right now, to try and figure out why her uncle (her father figure) did what all he did. They can bring her back to Gotham and where she will be under Tabitha’s care, maybe join the sirens, or maybe even intern at Arkham where she meets Jerome, etc. They can do all of this.. the only thing that would be off would be her name. But maybe they can fix that. Also we all know Ivy and Harley end up having a romantic relationship. Ivy on the show is a 19 year old with the mind of a child still. I honestly have no clue how old the characters on the show are. I know Ivy is 19 (like I just said), and I think Jerome is 19, considering he was 18 when he died. Both Joker and Ivy are older than Harley I’m pretty sure. I think Silver is maybe 16 or 17? I’m honestly not sure, but I do know she’s younger than Jerome and Ivy. She would make the most sense in my opinion, either her or Lee.

(Sorry if there are a lot of mistakes, but I’ve been working on this so long and I honestly don’t feel like going back over it and fixing things. I hope you all can understand everything I’m trying to say lmao. Be sure to tell me your thoughts! Who do you think it will be? What do you think of this post? I love feedback, just please be respectful :) 

Voodoo, Vodka and Vampires ~Elijah Mikaelsson~

Request: Would you mind writing a Elijah x reader where Elijah saves reader from somewhere and takes care of her? If it’s not too much trouble 😇 your writing is absolutely amazing 💕⚜️

Warnings: A slight confrontation between reader and a man (fist fight)

Pairings: Elijah x Reader

Author’s Note: 

Thank you so much https://ladytevans07.tumblr.com! I really hope you like it and sorry it took so long. First week of Year 12 was a little bit of a rush. I really enjoyed writing this and feel free to give me honest feedback :) 

To all my other followers it would mean the world to me if you give the wonderful person above a follow :) and Like always- If ya’ll have anything in mind that needs writing just shoot me a message. 

Currently working on a the Flash with Barry Allen and Daryl Dixon one. 

— 

New Orleans. “The Big Easy” renowned for the birthplace of Jazz was actually and will always be a tumble dryer full of voodoo, vodka and vampires. You didn’t want to be demeaning to the place at all because it was exotic. From the french quarter, to the bayou, from bourbon street to dining at the Commander’s Palace and maybe getting your voodoo souvenir at Reverend Zombie’s House Of Voodoo. 

New Orleans truly had it all

But you learned that the hard way. 

You were seriously reconsidering the trip to the ‘big easy’ as your friends finished yet another bottle of vodka and you hadn’t even left the accomodation. 

“Y/N!” your best friend’s voice lolled from within the bathroom as the other one was sprawled out on the bed laughing hysterically at a magazine article. 

“Yeah!?” you called back pulling yourself up from the bench on the porch your room gave you access to. You were watching the little shops prepare for the festival that was about to make it’s way down the street towards the French Quarter. 

“Help me with this darn dress pleaaaaaaasssseeee.” she lolled again and you shivered at the amount of alcohol you could hear in her voice. 

You didn’t drink much. You tried to stay as sober as possible with your friends being the ones that usually drink till they can’t remember a thing. You were just cautious. The mother-hen of the friend group. And you were damn proud of it. 

You stepped into the bathroom clearly seeing your tipsy best friend struggling with her skin tight sparkling dress’ zipper. She turned and pouted- her dress falling so that her bright pink bra was visible as her shoulders slouched. 

“Oh c’mon” you said motioning for her to turn around and with that her giggle and babbling returned. 

“I love you so much Y/N” she smiled as she landed her frail hands on your shoulders after you quickly and easily fixed her dress. I nodded and she laughed hysterically. The plain swing dress you were wearing nothing in comparison to her and the other two girls’ clothes. 

 “WE ARE READY!” she screamed leaping out of the bathroom- both of their squeals echoed down the hallway. You sighed bolting out of the bathroom trying to grab everything that you needed for tonight’s festival. 

“fuck.” you hissed as you knocked over an empty bottle of vodka and it clattering to the ground. You ignored it and slipped on your flats. 

“Phone, keys, purse, money, camera.” you listed and with that you were out the door struggling to keep up with the squealing friends. You quickly glanced at your watch. It was already 9:00pm. You most certainly missed the family friendly part of the festival. 

Tonight was going to be fun

In all honesty. 

You’d much rather be doing some historical tour of New Orleans than being stuck counting the heads of your drunken friends as they hung around locals at a alcohol stand on the busy streets of the French Quarter. 

‘one, two.’ 

You glanced around you feeling utterly out of your comfort zone. You had walked about three or four blocks from your accomodation towards this area with a massive struggle as the two girls were just picking up drink after drink. 

You feared what was going to happen later tonight. You were awkwardly seated at one of the bars and upon arriving you quickly claimed the table that gave you just enough view of the street to keep an eye on your friends. Other than that you were deeply lost in a novel you had strung along in your handbag. 

But as your eyes grazed across the crowd in habit something odd caught your gaze. When you looked again your eyes were glued to one spot. Someone was staring at you. The tall man with the sleek suit was leaning against a pole blatantly starring at you. His skin like porcelain. A small smile playing around his lips. 

You stiffened and he immediately noticed. And offered you an even softer smile which you returned slightly. 

He was suddenly pulled out of his gaze by a woman with bright blonde hair hitting him on the shoulder and your heart and stomach sunk. Slowly you turned back to counting the heads of your three friends and trying your best to focus on the words on the page. But you couldn’t and looked up. 

The man was gone and you groaned slightly. Then you counted again. 

‘one, tw-’ you counted but the last brunette was nowhere to be seen. 

Your eyes flared up in horror and your chest flamed at the thought of loosing one of them in New Orleans. Drunk! 

Your eyes started scanning. But in the ocean of heads your eyes strained. 

“Mel!” you called your best friend’s name prepping to grab your bag and start running into a crowd much like a chicken who had just got his head chopped off, but when no one’s head’s turned- you realised the seriousness of the situation. Your toes and fingers went numb.

 “Me-” but before you could finish your sentence a icy cool hand shed over your bare shoulder. 

“She’s over there.” a deep voice spoke in your ear almost. You turned around, startled slumping back down in the chair. The same man that was staring at you was standing before you his hand slightly rested on your bare shoulder. 

You glanced at the direction his slim finger held and relieved you sighed out loud seeing the brunette. 

“Thank you for that.” you blurted noticing how gorgeously perfect the man that hovered over you was. 

“It’s my pleasure. May I?” he questioned motioning towards the open chair you smiling cautiously. 

“Yes of course.” you smiled as he took the seat in front of you. You flipped your book closed and looked up at then mysterious man- who first stared at you and now wanted to sit with you. 

“My name is Elijah Mikaelsson.” he introduced himself, asking for your hand. You slowly gave it to him as he planted a kiss on the back of it and you flustered slightly. 

“Y/N…Y/L/N.” you smiled as he let go of your hand you slowly retracted it. 

“It’s an absolute pleasure to meet you Y/N.” he softly smiled. Your tummy lit up in butterflies. Like a match being ignited. 

You then suddenly noticed with a shock what you were wearing. In comparison to the rest of New Orleans and especially in comparison to Elijah. 

Your eyes shifted uncomfortably, looking nervously as people passed, to your friends, to him and he immediately noticed. 

“You look extraordinary Y/N.” he spoke as if reading your thoughts. 

“Thank you, I’m not really one for events like this” you painfully stated. 

“Well-” he stated, “You do look the part.” 

“You don’t look too bad yourself Elijah.” you smiled. 

He chuckled heavily making you laugh with him. 

“If I may- those friends of yours. The ones that are a little bit over intoxicated. Are you looking after them?” he innocently questioned. 

You chuckled, “Spot on Elijah Mikaelsson.” 

He chuckled and you smiled towards him. 

“Speaking of them- I should go check up on them.” you smiled, “I’ll see you around.” 

He smiled- “it’d be a pleasure” 

1:58 am. Your watch flickered and you with that you flipped your book close. 

That’s enough for one night. And with that you grabbed your belongings. 

After struggling to get a hold of both your friends and pry foreign hands off them- it was safe to say that you were on your way back to the accomodation. 

The night’s events embedded deeply in your memory. Elijah’s name and gorgeous smile making you grin like an absolute idiot. You knew it was only a short conversation but oh how you wished for it to be much longer. You disappeared into your own thoughts but your dreamworld was rudely interrupted. 

Your best friend’s shrill scream echoed in the empty alley you had wondered in within your daze of thoughts. Within seconds you pushed the other one behind you to see what was going on. The panic flaring up in your chest for the second time in two days. Someone was pinning her against the wall.

“Hey! Get your bloody hands off her!” you yelled without thinking. You stepped forward and tugged at the person who held your whimpering best friend. But he didn’t budge. Only turned his head to snarl at you and once he opened his mouth you had to stifle a scream. 

Fangs. Protruding from his mouth like that of a dog’s. And cracks appearing under his demon eyes. You then in the darkness of the alley saw the liquid coating not only his fangs but his whole mouth and the liquid that stained your best friend’s sequenced dress. 

“No!” you screamed and flung your fist at his cheek. But as soon as it connected with his face your hand flared up in agonising pain. You had- although- startled him so much that he had moved away from Mel and hollered a foreign word. 

You grabbed a hold of your friend and tugged her towards the other trembling girl behind you- but before you could register- the man recoiled and hit you hard across your face. 

You hit the ground with immense force and your friends let out a shrill cry for help. 

“You bastard!” You yelled as you leapt to your feet. You readied your fists once again and the man laughed planting another fist to the same cheek. 

You wanted to vomit from the pain but stood your ground. You then hit- he dodged- you hit again- and then kicked- catching him off guard only slightly. Then he hit you again and your knees buckled. 

“What were you doing with the Original?” he questioned as you tried to pull yourself upright. Two or three other men had decided to show up and was harshly both your friends in their un-Godly strong arms. 

“I-” you spat out blood, “Don’t know what you are talking about.” 

Then a kick came to your ribcage and you recoiled. The screams from your two friends not seizing. Another kick. And another. Your sprawled on the ground as the man with the dirty blonde hair- hair that looked black in the alleyway lifted you by the collar. 

You had never regretted wearing a dress this much before. But another blow came to your face and you could feel your face swelling. 

“Let them go!” you yelled out. “Please!” you screamed. 

“They are mine- you and that Original- I saw the way he looked at you. I’m going to make him suffer” he angrily shouted and you almost vomited. How was he going to make someone else suffer by beating you? 

“Kill them-” he uttered. 

“NO!” you screamed. “No, no!” 

He let out a shrill laugh as he kicked you again but suddenly someone was towering over you- much taller than the man who was beating you. 

You regained some energy and crawled away. But as you turned your eyes connected with a horrifying scene. 

“Elijah-” your voice stammered. He had quickly extended his hand and snapped the man’s neck letting him fall limply to the ground. Elijah’s fangs blood red. The same cracks visible under his eyes. You felt your head spin as another figure advanced towards the men holding your friends- two actually. 

Then Elijah advanced toward you, trying to pull you up. “Elijah what are you?” you called. 

“Y/N don’t be afraid” he reassured and you felt the darkness drag your eyes closed. 

“Y/N” he sternly stated and within a flash he was by your side- catching you before you hit the ground. 

You woke with distant voices tugging you from your slumber. In a matter of seconds the events of the night before hit your mind like a bullet and your body convulsed against a sheet. 

“Elijah!” you gasped springing up from the incredibly soft mattress you were laying on and the immediate headache that came with a pang. 

The room you were in was absolutely elegant. A gold trim decorating the accents of the cream coloured walls. You didn’t take much notice further because your eyes landed on Elijah and you had to stiffen a scream. 

His eyes lit up and he strolled over to you. 

“No you stay away from me!” you stammered as Elijah stopped in his tracks. 

“I am not going to hurt you Y/N.” he said sternly. “I am not going to hurt you- I promise. Your safe. Your friends are safe. Those men are gone-” 

You interrupted him quickly, “You call them ‘men’ they were monsters!” you exclaimed. His eyebrows furrowed in regret and exhaustion. He then continued to walk towards you. 

“You…you looked like them.” you whispered and he nodded. 

“I need to tend to your wounds.” he said. You nodded. He seated himself on the bed as he pulled a cloth out of a bowl of murky looking water. You dodged it by leaning back, your eyes flicking over to the bowl and then back to him. 

“It’s an antiseptic Y/N.” he sighed and you sat upright once more. You winced as he pressed the dap cloth onto an open crack above your eyebrow. 

“Elijah.” you whispered, “What are you? What was that man looking for? He said I talked to an Original and that he was going to make him suffer by beating me. I don’t understand.” Your lower lip trembled. 

Elijah put the cloth back in the bowl and played with his own fingers. 

“He was looking for me Y/N” he spoke deeply lost in thought, “I’m an Original.” 

“What does that mean?” you questioned angrily, hands shaking. His hands landed on yours. The one purple and pink. The one you punched the man with. 

“I’m an Original Vampire.” he said and you nearly punched him square in the nose but your jaw just tightened. 

“That man- he- he- was one?” you questioned and he nodded his head. 

“I was planning on catching up with you later the evening and one of them must’ve overheard my conversation with my sister.” he rambled. 

“I punched a vampire.” you whispered and he chuckled slightly. 

“You put up one hell of a fight Y/N.” he whispered and you smiled. 

“I wasn’t prepared to die for a guy who hasn’t even taken me out on one date.” you smiled and he returned it but it quickly faded. 

“What happened to my friends?” you questioned as the panic started to set in. 

“My brother- Niklaus- took them to their accomodation. He- compelled them.” he stated, “He made them forget.” 

You looked up at him. “Can you compel people to?”. He nodded, 

“If you want I can do the same for-” he stated painfully but you quickly interrupted him. 

“No!” you blurted. 

“Your not frightened of me are you?” he questioned slightly locking eyes with you once more. 

“You saved me Elijah, and you looked after me.” you explained, “I don’t think I’ll ever be afraid of you.” 

“I’m a monster Y/N.” he sighed irritably. 

“You saved me- a person you barely knew.” you defended. “Your taking care of me Elijah- you are not a monster.” you forced. 

He nodded, “Maybe we’ll argue this later?” 

You shook your head the dull ache returning, Elijah taking the towel again. Slowly dabbing it onto the open wound on your forehead. 

“We may continue arguing the case over dinner perhaps?” he stated, a sly smile curling from his lips. 

“I can’t help but accept Elijah.” you smiled, only slight mimicking his own words and tone. You smiled up at him. How beautiful he was and yet he still believed that after saving you- he’d still be a monster. You were determined to change that. He wasn’t a monster. 

He might be a vampire- but not a monster. You were sure of it.