max mead

Why I didn’t like the Maximum Ride movie

It’s awful. This film only takes half, at most, of what Maximum Ride is about. Let’s rhyme it off.

- The house in the mountains is supposed to be the safest and most comfortable place the flock has ever been to. They. Do. Not. Want. To. Leave. Angel gets captured when the flock are ambushed by a team of Erasers with a CHOPPER while out picking wild strawberries near their secret house in the woods, where they are not cooped up inside all the time; they can go outside and fly around freely.

- Max’s first encounter with Nudge in the film is her threatening and yelling at Nudge. Max is their mother figure; she doesn’t yell at the flock, with the exception of Fang.

- They mis-aged all the characters. Angel is supposed to be 6, Gazzy is 8, Nudge is 11, and Max, Iggy and Fang are 14. Not so in the film.

- Max NEVER had the files on their identities hidden in the house. Ever. Those were found by the flock at the school much later in the storyline.

- When the flock abandoned the house and went on the run, all 5 (not including the captured Angel) were on the way to Lake Mead. Max split from the group to help Ella (the unnamed girl who Max rescued in the film), who was being bullied by several boys, and not from some drunk boyfriend, as Ella is also only 14.

- When Max is shot, Dr. Martinez, who is a VET and not a DOCTOR, examined her and discovered Max’s wings due to the fact that the bullet injured Max’s wing as well as her shoulder. Max was x-rayed and her chip was found in her FOREARM. Dr. Martinez and Ella both know about the Flock and their avian-hybrid capabilities, and in the film, they’re left in the dark and are barely a blip on the plot-line map. Max is then made to wait at somewhere around 3 days before her wing is healed enough to fly to Lake Mead.

- When Max catches up to the flock at Lake Mead, the flock are staying in a CAVE. Not a cabin, with food and warmth and beds. A cave. Eating stolen food out of dumpsters and snacking on some chocolate chip cookies that Dr. Martinez made for Max before Max left. They learn new flying techniques from the family of hawks that nest nearby.

- It appears that all of the flock have chips embedded in them somewhere, as the School seems able to monitor their physical statuses.

- Max is meant to accidentally kill Ari in a one-on-one fight in the sewers below the School while escaping with the flock and several other able-bodied recombinant DNA kids, and Total, the talking dog. Jeb finds Ari as Max is leaving the tunnel behind the rest of the pack, and as Max is flying away, he yells after her that she killed her own brother. Whoops. Way to forget a super important plot twist.

- Max’s first encounter with the Voice, the thing that showed her all those images of her childhood and New York at the end of the film, is supposed to be VERBAL. It’s the VOICE. It speaks.

- They neglected to mention that Ari, Jeb’s son and the main Eraser character of the film, is only 7 years old, and aged physically due to his DNA being effed with when he became and Eraser.

- Angel does actually speak. She doesn’t say a word in the film until almost the end of the movie. She does actually talk.

- Max sees none of those images about her childhood or about a file. She sees images of New York and the word Institution repeated over and over. That is the only clue they have when they set out for New York.

- Nudge is a much more happy-go-lucky character than she is portrayed as in the movie, where she is an emotional, angsty teenager.

- Wtf was with the casting choices, dude? Max needs to be way move average build, not a toothpick. Toothpicks can’t hold their own in a fight against superhuman wolf-men. Fang needed long black hair. Iggy’s wings were supposed to be white, as were Gazzy’s and Angel’s. Not to mention they were all several years too old for their characters. Ew. Just ew.

Other than all that, the pacing was terrible, there was no sense of urgency to the film, and no real sense of danger in the scenes where Angel is being experimented on. The tests in the book were portrayed to be much more severe, and they were more like rat-in-a-maze type tests than intellectual, solve-the-equation type tests.

Also, the scars on their backs are complete BS. The wings fold up small, close to their backs. Not INTO their backs. They don’t just go poof. Sorry. Way to avoid any of the potentially-accurate sciencey bits, Mr. Director. I can’t believe James Patterson signed off on this bullcrap.

2

You were laying peacefully on your bed, editing some of the videos that you had shot with your friends from last week. Whenever you edited videos, it took forever because you were trying to figure out which clips you were going to upload and when you would upload them, and just the whole process in general was time consuming. While you were doing your editing, your phone that was beside you rang once, telling that you received a text. You grabbed your phone to see who it was, and saw that it was Max, who asked, “Are you going online? We’re waiting for you.” You sent him a text back saying that you would be on in five minutes, and once the text was sent, you jumped off of your bed eagerly and went over to your gaming center. Once you were done setting everything up, you began to film and joined the lobby. When you finally connected, you were automatically greeted with the usual hey or hi, but there was one person who was especially excited to talk to you, and it was Max.

He was the first to notice that you had joined the lobby, and when he saw, he instantly yelled, “(y/n)!!” You laughed at his adorable ways and sweetly said, “Hey Max.” Everyone was eager to play a game, so the group took a moment to figure out what to play. Some wanted to play TTT, some wanted to play the Hidden, and then others wanted to play Hide and Seek, so everyone decided to play those games in that order. Once you started playing, you waited for the engine to figure out who was going to be a traitor and who was going to be innocent, and in the end, you were innocent. You knew how paranoid everybody could get, so you laughed as they all talked manically and walked as far away as you could. Max noticed this and called out to you, saying, “Hey (y/n), where are you?” You decided to play it coy so you suspiciously said, “… Nowhere..” The group instantly became suspicious of you, and you could Nick say with his panic voice, “Find (y/n)!” You laughed as you realized that you were in deep trouble, and went off to a secret hiding spot that you had found a while back.

You were waiting in your spot alone, snickering whenever you heard Adam or Nick complain occasionally about how they couldn’t find you. While you were waiting for the round to finally end, you saw a person’s body drop right next to yours. You got scared and yelled out, “Wow!” Once you put yourself together, you looked over to see who it was and saw the character’s name read “GassyMexican.” When you saw his name, you instantly relaxed your shoulders and gave out a sigh of relief, but then you realized something: this was a game of TTT. Since this was the case, you stepped away from Gassy and said, “Stay back, Max.” He took a step towards your character and asked, “Why?”
“Because you could be a traitor, that’s why.” His character continued to walk towards you and you could hear Max foolishly whisper, “Hey.. Hey (y/n).. Want to make a trust pact?.. With me?” You laughed at him and shrugged your shoulders to the camera and said, “Sure.”

In the distance you could Chilled call out to you, saying, “(y/n). You should kill him.” You laughed at his suggestion and simply stated, “I can’t. We have a trust pact.” Right after you said that you could hear Adam laugh as he said, “Who said you have to follow a trust pact?” You shook your head as you smiled and said jokingly, “People with integrity, something you don’t have.” At that point everybody in the lobby began to boom out their oohs in unison at the burn you had just dished out. Once everyone had settled down, you could hear Adam jokingly exaggerate as he said with pain, “That hurt, (y/n). That hurt deep.” You laughed at the way he was acting and saw that everyone was back in the lobby, about to play a game of Hide and Seek. While you were waiting for the game to start, you started talking to Max about the trust pact you guys had made and asked, “How long does it last?” You could hear him making a thinking noise and heard his response, “I’m not sure.” Since both of you were unsure of how long a trust pact should last, you shrugged your shoulders and asked with a thick british accent, “Well, I propose another trust pact to take place.” Max caught onto your little act and responded with an even thicker british accent saying, “I believe I shall concur upon this request.” You both began to make random sounds that reminded you of old british men from the 1800s agreeing on something. While you both did that, everyone laughed at you two and even joined in on sounding like old english people, but then the game of Hide and Seek began.

Everyone waited for the engine to choose who was a hider or seeker, and once it chose you as a hider, you called out to Max and asked, “Are you a hider or seeker?” He revealed that he was a hider and so you took the opportunity and asked, “Remember our trust pact? Well then, let’s hide together.” Without a moment to hesitate, Max agreed with your offer and told you where you could find him. After a few moments of searching for him, you found him hidden in a dark crevice and said enthusiastically, “Oh man, this place is awesome!! How’d you find it?” Max began to use a cute, innocent lisp as he said, “To be honest, I just um.. I just fell in here.” You laughed at his response because you knew that he was telling the truth, but stayed there with him until the round ended.

As time went on, you and Gassy continued to make trust pacts no matter what teams you were on. Everyone caught on to what you guys were doing and began to say that it “wasn’t fair” or that “you guys should give those trust pacts a break for now”. You guys realized that they were right and said to them, “Fine. We’ll just do one more trust pact.” As you guys said that, everyone spawned in their certain area of the map, but when you looked around you saw that someone was in front of you.. It was Gassy! You called out to him happily and said, “Max! Let’s go around. Follow me!” Right as you said that, you began to run off to a certain part of the map with Max following right behind you. While you guys ran there, you played with one another and laughed together, happy that you guys were together for your last trust pact. Max was playing with a random wheel that was on the map, and did one of his famous puns, making you both fall into hysterics. Everyone in the lobby laughed, and after some time, it was just you and Max laughing together. While you were laughing, you could hear Adam awww randomly, and then he said, “You guys are just so cute together.”

Everyone began to voice their agreement on Adam’s statement, making you blush to yourself. You could hear Max start to laugh with his goofy chuckle as he said, “Why’d you make it weird like that? You had to go there?” Adam began to laugh hysterically and simply said, “Hey, hey, hey.. I’m just speaking the truth here.”