Specifically for the part of Maryland that counts as the DC Metro area, because I grew up there and eventually moved away and realized it’s so much fucking weirder than anyone there knows. I’d do VA too but I know jack shit about living in Northern Virginia–and anyway, as a Maryland native, I am a blood-sworn enemy to NOVA and all its ilk, so it doesn’t matter.
“I’m from DC,” you tell everyone. This is a lie. You never go into DC. You know you have been to DC and that you are in DC all the time, but you also know that you never go to DC. No one you know goes into DC. “Half an hour away,” you say. This might be true. The last time you went it took three hours, or maybe three years. You do not remember how you escaped.