i remember sun bleached days where my best friend who lived right down the block would come to my house and bring her scooter and we’d take turns riding around the cul de sac and when we got tired of doing that we’d go out into the street and dance until we saw a car coming and we’d eat applesauce and pretend we were magical creatures. i remember my mom baking cookies that were soft and filled with oozy chocolate chips and sometimes she’d make challah bread. i remember creating new worlds w/ my other best friend and drawing up fantasy creatures and writing up the most cliche ridden stories with mary-sue main characters. playing animal crossing and mario kart together until she had to go home. having sleepovers with both of them and talking about our crushes and eating oreos until we felt sick and playing m.a.s.h and laughing when we got a really weird guy or 52 kids. i remember going on walks to the candy store and buying huge bag fulls of gummy worms and warheads. i remember writing out a very persuasive letter on a sticky note to my best friends dad to convince him to let us play fable II. i remember the humid smell of skate king and the peeling 80′s carpet and the god awful pizza and the great fucking time i’d always have skating around until my thighs were sore and dancing queen echoed in my head every time i closed my eyes. i remember even further back, making mud pies and trying to heal dying moths and riding my bike around my street and falling and not getting up for a good solid two minutes out of straight embarrassment. lying on the school playground picking fluff from the cottonwood trees off the grass. my mom used to make spaghetti with angel hair pasta and chicken. i used to have long hair that went down past my waist. i used to use instant messenger every day, talked to a boy in my class and he once told me to tell him how he sounded when he sung because he wanted to serenade his girlfriend. i remember sending weird emails to guys i thought i had crushes on. i remember building a whole village out of littlest pet shop buildings and making bad music videos using green day songs. i remember listening to owl city and LIGHTS on repeat. drinking tea with milk and watching HGTV with my mom. i remember so much. it’s so strange to know those are moments in the past. that i’ll never be able to relive them. that they only exist in my memory now, fuzzy and out of focus. that one day i might forget them.