Upside Down Romance | P.P

Pairing: Peter Parker x Fem!Reader

Summary: You work up the courage to ask Peter if he’s ever tried the iconic Spiderman kiss

Warnings: none

Author’s Note: Please leave feedback! This idea was requested by the wonderful @mischiefandi - thank you darling!

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Halloween Masterlist | Masterlist

Originally posted by peters-holland


“Which one is Peter?” You whispered to your friend, Ned, who was leaning against the beige column in the middle of one of your classmate’s house. You were sipping at the punch in your hand, flattening down your ballerina tutu that was covered in fake blood while your eyes scanned the crowd in front of you. People pretended to be vampires, clowns, and zombies but the most popular costume of the year was Spiderman.

Ned fixed his fedora, making sure his big black curls were intact underneath and you had to admit, he pulled off the Slash look well. “The one with the real suit.” He hissed under his breath, but loud enough for only you to hear.

“They all look the same!” You exclaimed, wide eyes as you tried to find the other friend that completed your trio. Peter had texted you twenty minutes ago telling you that he was here, but you had yet to even see him, or maybe you had but with the mask on, you didn’t know it was him. “I’m going to go searching for him, you go that way and I’ll go this way.” You ordered, pointing in different directions before you started walking around the room, weaving in and out of people.

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The Law of Inevitability

bucky x reader.

summary: you were assigned by a high level of the CIA to infiltrate the avengers. you fell in love with bucky instead. who says you can’t do both?

warnings: smut, violence, swearing?? idk the usual

words: 4k

a/n: mr. & mrs smith au no one asked for!! lowkey the longest fic i've ever written. feedback/comments always welcome!!

You shifted into a more comfortable position in the cramped vent, absentmindedly scrolling through Twitter as you waited for the information to upload onto the hard drive. Popping another Dorito in your mouth, you hastily wiped the powdered cheese off your fingers on the Kevlar vest once the screen began to fill with windows of information. Browsing quickly, you opened the file that had been updated just minutes before—information on the Avengers next mission. Down to every last detail.

Smiling to yourself, you quickly stuck the thumb drive in the laptop and transfer all the files over, crunching through half the bag of Doritos as you waited. It contained all the info on JARVIS’s system, as well as the files on every digital device located within the Tower’s walls. Security cameras, cell phone data, even Netflix accounts. You chuckled as you went through Tony Stark’s Spotify playlists. Never would have pegged the guy for a country fan.

The notification popped up letting you know everything was transferred, and you safely ejected the thumb drive and slipped in back in the pocket of your jacket. A couple minutes later and you’d cleared any digital footprint that would alert the systems into knowing it had been hacked. Checking your phone, you saw it was almost seven. Perfect timing, you thought to yourself. Your date was at eight thirty—enough time to get home and shower before Bucky was due to arrive at your place

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It’s looking like I’m gonna post the first chapter of my Bucky Barnes Beauty and the Beast story on Tuesday. I’ve had it written for a while and I feel like it’s time to post the beginning of the story.

Originally posted by ironarm

If anyone wants to be tagged let me know. This is gonna be the first of many modern Fairytale stories.

I wanna give a shout out to fic writers really quick-

Y’all are the shit. And I love each and every one of you.

But please stop apologizing when your fics are really long. I see writers in their a/n saying “this is over 5k words I’m so sorry”

LIKE BBY NO. IM HERE FOR THAT SHIT. Give me every beautiful detail your talented mind can muster.

If I want a short story I’ll go find a drabble.

Don’t you ever apologize for being passionate in your writing. & fuck anyone that has made you think you should apologize.


thank you for coming to my ted talk.

UHM ALRIGHT

SO THE RUSSOS JUST POSTED THIS ON THEIR INSTAGRAM AND IT’S FAN ART BUT THERE’S SO MANY THINGS THAT COULD BE HIDDEN CLUES FOR A4 IN IT LOOK:

  • IT’S LITERALLY ALL THE PEOPLE THAT DIDN’T DISAPPEAR IN THE SNAP
  • SHURI HAS THE BLACK PANTHER SUIT ON
  • TONY HAS PETER’S MASK IN HIS HAND SO OBVIOUSLY THAT HIT HIM VERY HARD BUT WE ALREADY KNEW THAT
  • ROCKET HAS GROOT’S GAME
  • CLINT AND SCOTT ARE THERE
  • TONY AND STEVE ARE TOGETHER (ALSO INCLUDING NAT AND RHODEY)
  • CAPTAIN MARVEL IS IN THE BACK BEHIND THOR SEND HELP HOLY SHIT
  • LIKE THE TV’S IN THE BACKGROUND SAY NO SIGNAL AND SHIT CAUSE HALF OF THE WORLD IS GONE AND EVERYONE IS PROBABLY LOSING THEIR MINDS
  • TV’S ARE SMASHED/THE PLACE IS TRASHED
  • THE NEWSPAPER ON THE GROUND IN THE BOTTOM RIGHT CORNER ON THE FLOOR (ZOOM IN) SAYS END OF THE WORLD CONFIRMING THAT EVERYONE IS LOSING THEIR MINDS
  • THE POSTERS ON THE WALLS
  • WE EVEN GOT STAN LEE UP IN THIS BITCH

REBLOG TO SAVE A MARVEL FAN’S LIFE LMK WHAT Y’ALL THINK I’M GOING CRAZY ( this is fan art, but they still wouldn’t have just posted any fan art like this has to be some type of clue)

Fifty Shades of Bucky

***thank you @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan​ for the gorgeous graphic

A series of sexual escapades where Bucky shows you what it’s like to give in to your deepest desires.

Vanilla Sex - You and Bucky have sex for the first time.

The Basics (Part 1) - Bucky stops by your room after a long day and offers to teach you the basics.

The Basics (Part 2) - Bucky takes things to a whole new level, teaching you another one of the basics.

Limits -  You and Bucky discuss hard and soft limits. You discover that Bucky doesn’t like it when you roll your eyes at him. 

Dinner Party - You and Bucky attend a dinner party at Stark Tower.

A Serious Conversation - After an interesting evening spent with Natasha and Wanda, you and Bucky have a serious conversation.

Riding Crop and Leather Restraints -  Bucky takes your sexual training to a new level.

The Accidental Truth - Bucky visits you in your office and you overhear a conversation that leaves you reeling.

A Proposition - You come to terms with what happened between you and Bucky.

Lipstick Limits - You and Bucky outline his hard limits on touching.

Rack ‘Em Up - You’re good at pool, but not as good as Bucky.

Confrontation -  You have an unexpected confrontation with Natasha. You and Bucky argue.

Handcuffs and Bullets - You explore the contents of Bucky’s “toy” drawer. He chooses one to use with you.

Escape - A surprise car ride with Bucky turns into so much more than you ever expected.

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Chilling with Loki as a Snake Would Include...

Originally posted by lokihiddleston

- so it starts off with you just chilling on the couch reading or something

- and Loki notices this daily occurrence

- and one day he just

- changes himself into a snake

- and he just chills there with you

- and you’re not even fazed

- and it escalates, so to speak

- he just slithers around following you

- and he’ll wrap himself around your leg

- especially if you’re wearing long baggy pants

- he’ll just slither up in there

- most of the time you don’t even see him

- you’ll be walking to the kitchen or something

- and suddenly you’ll feel something creeping up your leg

- “hey loki”

- “hisssss”

- sometimes when it’s for sure just the two of you

- or he’s had a little to much to drink

- loki will appear out of nowhere

- shout “SNAKE ATTACK”

- and launch himself at you as a snake

- leaving you flailing trying to catch him

- and sometimes

- usually when it’s just the two of you

- he’ll drape himself across your shoulders

- and this is fine too

- sometimes he’ll do it even if the others are around

- and they’re wondering where and when the hell you got a snake

- and you don’t say anything

- you just smile

- but then one day

- he’s on your shoulders

- you’re in the kitchen making tea or something

- and here comes thor

- he sees a snake just casually chilling on your shoulders

- ‘AH BROTHER THERE YOU ARE’

- and his exclamation makes both of you jump

- and startles loki so bad

- that he accidentally changes back into a human

- so now you’ve got a grown ass god draped across your shoulders

- …for about .2 seconds

- and you both just drop to the ground

- with loki on top of you

- loki is sputtering

- thor is bent in half about to fall on the ground he’s laughing so hard

- you just know there will be pictures and video

- and for some reason it hasn’t occurred to loki that he’s on top of you and maybe he should get up

- but if you’re being honest you don’t mind

- and you two make eye contact

- he’s frazzled and huffing

- and you just start giggling

- and you can’t stop

- and it’s not long before you’re just full blown laughing

- nearly as hard as thor

- who by the way is now sitting on the ground leaning against the cabinets for support because he’s about to fall over

- and despite how frazzled and annoyed he is

- loki smiles

- you both make sure to pay attention to your surroundings after this

- and no one lets loki live down the fact that he got scared human


Let me know if you wanna be tagged/untagged!  Sorry if you didn’t wanna be tagged!  Strikethroughs mean it wouldn’t let me tag you!

Marvel Taglist: @aubzylynn @mylittlefandomfanfictions @kenmen02 @thyotakukimkim @suddenclarityharry @myplaceofthingsilove @graysonmalfoy @panda-rosita @cutie1365 @hakuoyuki @scarletraine @evanlederp

Loki Taglist: @1800-fight-me @tbetz0341 @unicorniorosacomefrutillas

My favorite things in Tony fanfics

  • When Tony dads Peter
  • When Jarvis is sassy
  • When Rhodey is Tony’s #1 no matter whom he’s dating
  • Mama Rhodes
  • WHEN ALL THE AVENGERS REALISE THAT HE’S ACTUALLY A SELF-SACRIFICING DEPRESSED BEAN AND START BEING NICE TO HIM.
  • When the Avengers do little things for him like bring him food, drag him to bed, cover him with a blanket, cuddle him, etc.
  • When Tony’s in a healthy relationship and is happy.
  • Tony just being happy
Late into the Night (College!AU Bucky x reader)

PAIRING: Bucky x reader

TYPE: One-Shot (1/1)

REQUEST: @sumafamouxx  hey bub can you do the roommate with exams au from the first au list? with bucky and a sprinkle of pining angst please :) 

“You’re my roommate who’s super cute and it’s the middle of the night and you’re cramming for your exams in your flannel pyjamas and disheveled hair and it’s becoming increasingly hard for me not to kiss you” AU.

WARNINGS: fluff, lily tiny bit of angst

WORD COUNT: 2.2k

Masterlist

Originally posted by iloveboylove

Bucky liked to listen to music while he worked. It was always different depending on his stress levels. If it was a particularly easy piece of work that he had plenty of time to complete it in, he’d play throwback hits – ones he could quietly hum along to as he worked. If it was something he had to focus on, it was softer songs with light guitar and slow tempos. Then there was the music that accompanied deadline-impending, frustratingly-impossible, mind-achingly-disgusting work.

Rock, heavy and loud with a strong base that felt like it was shaking your apartment walls.

Apparently tonight Bucky was tackling one of those deadlines, the thumping rhythm of ACDC invading your room and preventing sleep. You lay staring at your ceiling for a second, listening to the song change twice – each one heavier and louder than the last.

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Wake Up

Characters - Thor x Reader

Word Count - 718

Warnings - Fluff

A/N - Apparently, I can only write drabbles now. Thor wouldn’t leave me alone so I had to write this. Please do not hesitate to give me feedback on this. I know it’s short, but I still hope you guys like it!

Waking up in your bed alone wasn’t always a bad thing. You had much more space to lay in whatever position felt cozy, you were able to sink into your plush pillows and blankets without interruption, and most times you knew it meant that you could take extra time to sleep in. At least until a big voice attached to an equally big body roused you from your peace.

“Good morning, my love!” Though Thor’s voice startled you, it wasn’t enough to make you even bother to lift your head, let alone open your eyes.

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When It Rains: Part 1

A Thor x Reader / Soulmate Series

Master List

You’ve been dreaming of the same voice, the same man, for as long as you can remember. You never thought that he could be real, let alone that he was the God of Thunder, your soulmate, and the key to unlocking a mysterious power within you; a power that could be used to save Thor’s homeland of Asgard, or, in the wrong hands, to destroy it.

A/N: This is something I’ve been wanting to write for… well a long time, and I finally decided to just sit down and start it. This is NOT an au, so Thor is Thor, but it’s basically like, as if Infinity War never happened? ANYWAY, without going on too long, I hope that you enjoy the first part. This is also (loosely) based off the song Dreams by Fleetwood Mac. Thank you to @captainrogerss for reading this over for me. Let me know what you think. Your asks, likes, reblogs, and replies are always appreciated (although if you could reblog to get it out there, i’d appreciate it the most)! I’d love to hear if you wish for me to continue [:

Word Count: 1,046

Tags: (at the end)

*gif is not mine.

For as far back as you could remember, your dreams had been linked in some way.

While they weren’t always in the same location, you could tell that you were behind the eyes of the same person; a man, whose hands and forearms were the only thing that you were able to see of him. If he ever spoke in your dreams, you could never hear his voice. Except for one time only, when you heard the voice say one simple word:

Earth.

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One Touch (Loki x Reader)

Note: Sorry, just a repost because the original post went squiffy on my end. A soul mate AU based on this post and suggested to me by  @hodders2411! I kinda threw it together so it might be a bit all over the place but I hope you enjoy it anyway!

You are born with a black mark that changes colour when you touch your soul mate.

Words: 1886

Requests are open, so do feel free to drop me one here.

Let me know what you think, tag lists are open and you can find my other fics here: Masterlist


You’d always known that you were destined to kill your soul mate.

You were a mutant. Not the kind that the average person dreamed of being; someone who could fly or control the elements, bend time or even read minds. Those were powers that could be used for the common good. There was a status to those kinds of genes. They were the mutations of heroes.

But you… You were the worst kind of mutant. Your powers brought death and nothing else. With a mere brush of skin, you could pull the life from another. Even if you didn’t mean to, a single touch could take years off of a perfectly healthy man’s life.

Your hands were weapons. They were your curse. They also held your marks.

Those wonderful black marks that showed where your soul mate was supposed to touch you for the first time were on your hands. All over your palms and up your fingers, wrapping around the edges like beautiful black ribbons. As a child, everyone had thought your marks were so intriguing. Not like the average hand shake or high five kind of mark. Something unique and special.

The number of hours that you’d spent staring at your marks, imagining all the incredible ways that contact could occur, had to tick into the hundreds. Dreaming of another time, a different life, where you may have actually been able to touch the one you were destined to love. It was impossible not to, when you knew that you could never be with the one that would make you whole.

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Worthy (Steve Rogers)

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader

Warnings; swearing

Summary: reader can lift Thor’s hammer and Steve gets pouty about it.

A/N: IM SEEING INFINITY WAR TONIGHT GUYS AHHHHHH

Masterlist

Everyone watched as Tony struggled to lift Thor’s hammer, the veins on his forehead showing as he pulled with all he could. Confusion clouding his face as it didn’t even budge.

Tony left the room coming back seconds later with his iron man suit hand, a slight cocky look on his face as he went to lift it again. 

He was unsuccessful making everyone chuckle. Y/n looked at Thor who sat there smugly. He roped in the help of warmachine both of them sweating slightly at how hard they were trying.

“are you even trying?”

“are you even on my team?” Tony shot back.

Y/n laughed meeting Steve’s eyes as they watched the struggle

Steve stood up once the others gave up, rolling his sleeves up, he threw a smirk in y/n’s direction before gripping the handle with both hands.

“come on Captain” someone called, urging him on.

Steve pulled, the hammer budged the tiniest amount. 

Y/n looked over to Thor once again, seeing the look of slight fear on his face. But once he realized Steve couldn’t move it he relaxed, turning back to his smug self.

Bruce was next but also failed. Everyone else decided to pass.

Thor stood as everyone carried on questioning him about why they couldn’t make it budge.

“you all have interesting theories but it’s simple really” he shrugged, lifting the hammer with ease and playfully chucking it in the air and catching it. “you’re all not worthy”

Everyone collectively groaned at his smugness.

“how do you feel Cap?” Y/n spoke, sitting beside him. 

He looked at her with raised eyebrows.

“thought you could lift everything?” she spoke smirking at him.

The avengers chuckled at her playfulness, having gotten used to the two of them constantly teasing each other.

“you wouldn’t understand how heaves it is doll, it’s impossible” he spoke smirking back.

Thor placed his hammer back onto the table.

“be my guest lady y/n” he spoke gesturing to it, while smiling at her. She was Thor’s favorite Avenger, she was so considerate of others, so caring and always there for him when he needed to talk about things.

Steve chuckled as her face fell slightly, not wanting to embarrass her self knowing she wouldn’t be able to lift it.

But she didn’t back down.

Standing on her shaky legs she walked forward towards the hammer.

“don’t hurt yourself doll” Steve called out.

“fuck you Rogers” 

“oooooh y/n said a naughty word” Tony spoke making everyone chuckle including Steve who shook his head knowing he would never live that down.

Y/n’s small hands gripped the handle of the hammer both wrapping around each other. She went to pull hard but found the hammer easily lifted in her hands making her stumble backwards.

She was in shock. Everyone was in shock, mostly Thor.

She switched the hammer over from one hand to the other impressed at herself.

“that was easy, how come you all struggled so bad” she laughed.

Everyone still had their mouths open in shock.

She turned to look at Steve, shrugging at him as he looked confused and a little miffed.

“so the youngest Avenger is worthy but none of the older ones!” Tony spoke good heartedly “this is an outrage!” 

Everyone’s shock was wearing off, people now just amazed and in awe of how the smallest and youngest Avenger could lift the hammer. 

“you’re the first person i’ve met who has ever been able to lift it” Thor spoke in awe.

Steve didn’t like the admiration in his stare. 

“right it’s getting late, come on y/n let’s go, i’ve got some things I need to talk to you about concerning tomorrow” Steve spoke getting up and waiting for her to follow.

She handed Thor his hammer back, smiling at him apologetically and bidding everyone a goodnight.

“what did you want to talk about Cap” she asked, a hint of teasing still in her voice.

Steve didn’t reply still shocked at the whole incident. 

“Steve?” 

He didn’t reply.

“are you- are you giving me the silent treatment?” she asked laughing.

He turned to face her, his lips pulled together in a natural pout, she knew the look too well, it was the look when he never got his own way.

“are you all pouty because i’m worthy and you’re not?” she teased. She couldn’t help herself but trace her thumb over the pout on Steve’s lips, before leaning in close to his face. 

His eyes watched her every movement intensely. 

“you should have seen how Thor looked at you- like you were his godess” 

“hey! are you saying i’m not a godess” she asked.

“now look whose pouting” Steve laughed as she fake glared at him. “you’re my godess” he spoke “not Thor’s”

“you know, for such an old person, you’re such a baby” she laughed.

“take that back” he demanded a small threat in his voice and a stern look on his face.

She leaned in closer to him, her lips brushing past his in a barely there kiss, he was distracted momentarily.

“never” she spoke, making Steve break out of his trance she put him in. By the time she finished speaking she had legged it down the hall way.

“oh you’re really in for it” he called.

anonymous asked:

the first time he holds your hand + bucky? please?

this is the single softest ask i’ve ever received thank you


True Places

( “It is not down on any map; true places never are.” )

A/N: Feedback would be cherished. Finally cleared out the last request in my inbox!

Support my work?

Warnings: alcohol, alcohol induced vomiting, hangovers, mentions of PTSD, swearing, fluff, slight angst, slow burn-y kinda

Words: 3247

Keep reading

Family

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: Peter meets the reader for the first time. The reader has grown up under the wing of all of the Avengers and hasn’t met many new people before. 

Requested: No


The compound was relatively quiet - for the compound. There were still the distant sounds of Bucky and Sam’s arguing, murmurs from FRIDAY and Bruce. It felt like home.


I was four years old when I was rescued by the Avengers. It was on one of their first missions together, I was being held at a base as a result of something that my parents had done, having seen them murdered before my eyes. 

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Touch Starved

Summary: Bucky desperately wants you to touch him.
Word Count: 1,121
Warnings: Touch deprivation, rough explicit sexual content, utter filth, some dirty talk
Author’s Note: Requested by anon. Okay so concept: touch starved Bucky?

My work is not to be posted on any other sites (AO3, Wattpad, etc.) without my express written permission. Reblogs are fine.


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Splitting Hair

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader x Bucky Barnes

Warnings: established relationship, Fluff, reader gets irritated with bucky b/c reasons, it’s just cute

Word Count: 1500+

Request: “HEYYY!! Could you do. Stucky and reader one with 42 and 90 and it’s all fluffy and cute?? I love your writing!!!!” -Anon 

42. “I hate you.” - “No, you don’t.” 

90. “You’ve been replaced.” - “Alright, we’ll see how you feel when you need me to kill a spider in the shower.”

A/N: Ya’ll I know I have requested, and I’ve been sitting on them for SO LONG AND I’M SO SORRY! I’m trying and I have three others I’m working on but for the longest time, I just couldn’t get through them. not cause their bad, but I just couldn’t get my brain to work. This was one that I had two options to choose from(there were two prompt lists) and I went with these. I hope whoever requested it(if you still remember you asked) enjoys it!! It’s just a little fun and floof. Because I like floof as much as angst. Enjoyy!! once again I suck at titles yaaaay!!

**Also, if you want to get notified any time I post a story, go over to my side blog and follow! There you can hit the ‘get notifications’ button under the person icon and it’ll tell you when I post there! Enjoy!!

The gifs are not mine, credit to the owner.

Originally posted by henycavil

Originally posted by captainsamerica

Bucky tried to ignore the feeling of eyes boring into his back. For the past hour, he had been pointedly ignoring the person in question, keeping his back to the couch by sitting at the bar in the kitchen. He’d hear a huff every few minutes, and then a slight reprieve before the stare was back. It was more amusing to him than anything else, he didn’t do anything wrong. At least that was his opinion, it was certainly not Y/N’s.

Steve hadn’t been in the room when the little argument went on, having been off with Tony discussing an upcoming mission. When he finally wandered into the living room to find his boyfriend and girlfriend, he was caught off guard at the irritation on her face aim directly at Bucky’s broad back.

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Frostbite

Request:  can i request a fic between y/n and steve where they’re secret lovers but y/n chooses team iron man in civil war and then fast forward to infinity war she finds out about steve has moved on with nat -@/anon

Pairing: Steve x reader

Warning: Slight angst???

Word count: 3,734

A/N: Requests are open! I’ll try my best to write them <3 Thanks to my bff for helping me put this together.

Originally posted by dailyteamcap

There was a daffodil in her room.

Y/N quickly closed the door behind her and walked up to the nightstand next to the bed to pick it up. A smile crept up her lips as she twirled it around her fingers, her heart accelerating in excitement. She put it on top of the current book she was reading and made her way to the balcony where he was waiting; standing in the shadows, a knight with slick, blonde hair and deep blue eyes, moonlight touching his skin smiling as she walked closer.

“You know, the balcony isn’t really the first thing that comes to mind when you think of places to hide,” Y/N smirked as her steps end a foot away from him.

“It’s got a nice view, especially when you’re in it. And who says we’re hiding?” Y/N blushes, he’s the usual suspect for the butterflies in her stomach, and every time, she hides it behind a laugh.

“If you keep leaving flowers in my bedroom I’m pretty sure everyone will wonder who my secret admirer is, Steve.” Last week, it was sunflowers, daisies the week before that, then tulips, the list could go on. Her room would look like a flower shop by the end of the year. She didn’t have a problem with the flowers wilting, she could give them a slight frost and keep them forever. But in front of her was a man who made her melt, the warmth of summer radiating from him, charisma beaming and he was exactly what she needed in her steel cold life.

“Hmm, what name should we tell them?” Steve, tell them his name is Steve, Y/N thought as she turned to place her elbows on the balcony’s railing. The downside, is the two of them could never admit it. It was like a wood chip caught on a fingertip, it was obvious, it bared little irritation, but it’s there.

“If they ever ask, I’ll tell them he’s still having a tough time processing,” sarcasm was like breathing when she was around him, being straight to the point wasn’t a skill they were both equipped with. He let a low laugh out, he knew exactly what she implied but he still doesn’t say anything, and instead wrapped his arms around her waist as they both looked at the night sky. Y/N knew how he still felt like the scrawny boy he was from Brooklyn and never saw himself the way she saw him. Confidence wasn’t something that resonated from him whenever he’d talk to her, he hid behind jokes and she hid behind her laughs, constantly waiting for him to drop the shield he built over himself and let her hold him with everyone looking at them. But now, the deafening silence was enough for them both to know they were each other’s person. In their minds, they have plenty of time to wait and take things slow however long it may take, because the destination would be sweet. Little did they know the morning would make everything different.

-

And the morning was different, there was great tension in the air as the avengers all sat around the conference table with Thaddeus Ross, the Secretary of the State in front, reviewing all the calamities that have occurred in the past few years; how the heroes the avengers thought they were, became the image of vigilantes that civilians have come to recognize.

“And what word would you use, mister secretary?” Natasha asked.

“How ‘bout dangerous?” Y/N has stopped listening, the voices around her become muffled. Remembering the mission, they just went on in Lagos tracking Rumlow down. They remember the events differently, scattered around different parts of the area, doing different things ending up with different results. She didn’t want to blame Wanda, she was just a child it wasn’t her intention to break the building down, Steve immediately called for back-up, everyone was struck with guilt, a heavy pit suddenly rested in their stomachs, a boulder suddenly thrown on their backs. And then there was Y/N, it took the team hours to find her beneath the gravel, her arms covering the body of a young boy who only took minutes to heave his last breath. For weeks she couldn’t speak, she wanted to be the one lifeless.

“I’ve got you! I’m here,” she grabbed the boy as quick as she could, cement pressing on her left leg refusing her to escape. When she held him, a red splotch was making an appearance through his dust covered polo. “Oh no, no, no, no. Come on stay with me,” She exclaimed to herself as she lifted the boy’s shirt up only to find glass had hit him in the abdomen, “S-shit.”

She was screaming for help, hopelessly trying to pull her feet from the concrete, she even thought about cutting her leg to get free and get the boy out. She was breathing so hard, air escaping from her rapidly, she wished she could give it to the child, she was desperate, tears streaming down her face. She’s never saved anyone so close before. This child was just 5 feet away from her when the building collapsed and all she had done was pull him towards safety only to find out she was too late. They’ve always saved the mass, but this child was part of the mass, a tiny spec, but a member of it nonetheless, and she couldn’t even save one. The child coughed blood, a mouthful, and then the scene went mute. A pull of air escaped the boy’s lips, and tears stopped streaming from her, her eyes looking into the abyss.

“Y/N,” a voice brings her back to the present, a light nudge by Tony as he passed her a copy of a thick book. Sokovia Accords written in big letters, as the secretary explained the contents. The avengers would no longer be a private organization to operate under the UN panel whenever they deemed necessary, havoc has ceased into the lives of the innocent they all wanted to protect.

“The avengers were formed to make the world a safer place, I feel we’ve done that,” Steve’s voice was low, but sharp. All Y/N could think of was the boy who died in her arms.

“And what if we come to a decision you don’t like?” Nat inquires.

“Then you retire,” Ross exits as he leaves them to talk amongst themselves.

The room was filled with Rhodey and Sam’s voices, conflict ensuing as Vision stated the obvious, there being strength invites challenge, enemies will always be present as long as there are people who are ready to defend it. Polar opposites will always stick. Tony was being awfully quiet, having made up his mind, guilty about a similar death that stamped the obvious answer to the paper, he looked at Y/N as she nodded slowly back. Natasha was quick to back him up, the rest however, were neutral, including Y/N. She’s known Tony forever even before the avengers were formed, she joined in late but he’s always had her back, and she understood more than anything what he felt. It was tough but it was almost the obvious choice. She was one of the last people to leave the room when she heard Steve speak.

“You can’t stay silent forever you know that, right?” his eyes are serious, but they were pleading something.

“We shouldn’t be out here, breathing, sleeping on a warm bed at night, ready for the day tomorrow, while those people thought the same but in the end, was failed, by a bunch of people who call themselves heroes.” She replied, a pang of guilt rushed through her at the word heroes, she knew Steve only wanted to do what was right, but glorification wasn’t something she wanted. She didn’t feel like a hero. Steve stepped closer, gentle not to scare her away.

“It’s not your fault, you did what you could.” She looked up at Steve, tears about to brim her eyes, you did what you could? It wasn’t what she wanted to hear, she could’ve done something else, she could’ve done a lot more. She wanted him to hold her, she wanted to replay last night, with them under the moonlight, only worried of hugs and kisses and secret meetings. Now they were in a different realm, by a flick of a switch, the day became a challenge, the rest of their lives would be different. She just looked at his eyes as tears started coming out, Steve didn’t know what to do. The woman he cared for the most was in pain, just as confused as he was, but he didn’t know what to do. He knew about what happened that day, he was scared they wouldn’t find her, only to see her body hours later. She was stoic, and he was feeling bittersweet on the fact that he may have found her alive, but she was never the same. She walked out of the room before he could think of anything.

                                 ———————————————-

It’s been 2 years since the accords, Tony has gone missing after an incident in New York. Extra-terrestrials were back, and the threat is bigger than ever. The compound was rattled when Bruce came in, having not seen him for so long before everything in Vienna ensued, he was a welcoming sight, but his face told Y/N otherwise. Rhodey and Y/N listened intently at what the doctor explained, the infinity stones being the headliner. Soon, a meeting with the council was held, it felt belittling only having 3 avengers among a dozen people in suits spewing out commands.

“We’re not standing down, mister secretary. This is the matter of the life and death of the universe, and I won’t be dumb enough to stay in this building and do nothing.” Y/N says, Ross clearly taken aback but keeps a straight face.

“This is not a fight we should even be discussing, we need to start getting ready.” Rhodey replies, taking a quick glance at Y/N as she nods in agreement. Their heads whip to the direction of the glass door when three figures approach. Its Steve, followed by Natasha and Sam. Y/N’s heart stops, its been two years since she last saw him, his face looked different, a beard on his chin and his hair’s gotten long. She wonders if he gets enough sleep and eats enough meals. Natasha’s hair looked like it flipped a switch, she’s now copped a blonde hairdo, and looks slimmer than before, the last time Y/N saw her was at the airport, not exactly surprised to find out she let Steve and Bucky escape through one of the jets. She sends a quick and gentle smile at Bruce, Sam never not resisting a time to let his smart mouth dabble.

“Well, this is awkward,” Sam’s tone was a breath of fresh air compared to the friction in the room. Y/N looks at Bruce, he and Nat have been separated for so long, a relationship that never went where they intended it to go, and now they’re back in the same room with Nat giving him a friendly smile, almost apologetic. Bruce just nods on, not seemingly hurt, Y/N wished she could say the same. Ever since Steve came in the room, she couldn’t look him straight in the eyes, unsure of what to feel. Steve moves closer to the secretary, stating he’s past asking for forgiveness and is back only to fight for the cause he’s always supported, life.

“Good to have you back Captain,” she nods as the meeting ended and everyone went to their rooms to gear up. Steve gave her a wan smile, she never called him that, it was always Steve, but he should know better, he’s hurt her more ways than one. In a few hours they would leave for Wakanda, having one of the stones on Vision’s head, Y/N felt the pain Wanda did as she told him she would never leave his side even when they all knew the easiest way to extract it was to simply take it from his body which meant him being dead, but she was not one to leave without a fight, Vision was all she had. How she wished she could’ve done the same, but not knowing what to feel was still a dilemma she was having. She always liked seeing Vision and Wanda, they were just connected, Vision’s demeanor was without haste, he would ask personal questions with curiosity and naivety at the same time, maybe it was what helped Wanda open up to him. It was a thing she envied, but it seemed like she and Steve were way past that. 

As she slid her suit on, black and blue leather covering her body, tying her hair in a bun, she grabbed the hair tie from on top of the nightstand, only to notice the last thing he gave her, the daffodil that stood on top of the same book she’s stopped reading ever since he’s left. It looked as good as the night he gave it to her, petals covered in a light crystal frost. She wondered why she even kept it, it felt stupid, but her heart was operating on its own. Soon she found herself walking around the building to find Steve. She didn’t think of the words to say, she just wanted to see him, and whatever words that would come out she would allow. She still didn’t know how to greet him, she decided she would when the moment came. And there he was, standing in the middle of the hall. Y/N’s chest became heavy, its him, he’s here, he’s back. Maybe she could just stare at him in the dark, maybe that was enough, but then her feet were moving to the beat of their own drum, it was slow and unsure, but at the back of her mind was excited. It’s been 2 years and even though they’ve been separated under harsh circumstances, she didn’t care, she would say whatever she needed just to get him to look at her the way he used to. But her brain suddenly gained control, her feet stopped their tracks, she felt betrayed, the same betrayal she felt the last time she saw him.

                                                    - - - - - - - -

“I know where Rogers and Barnes are,” Tony speaks on the phone with Y/N, a loud roar of wind in the background, he’s on his way. “I’ll get him back.” She quickly got up and got on a quinjet, there was no way he could get him back on his own. He’s been so distant, when everything broke out. Y/N’s been trapped in shambles that kept expanding. Why didn’t he tell her? She felt betrayed, how could he not tell her something so important? Did he not trust her enough to know anything? Her trust was slowly deteriorating, but she struggled to keep it, and was now tracking Tony’s suit on the grid. She powered the quinjet and flew, the harsh storm felt like a blanket around her, a loud noise to drown her in her thoughts. She wanted to get there faster, she hit the controls so hard, and eyes stern and determined. She would get him back, she’s already lost herself in the gravel, and he’s the only reminder of who she was, she would do whatever it took to get him back.

When she got to last bleep on Tony’s digital print, she found herself in the snow, covering the ground in what seemed to be an endless winter. She felt comfort in the cold, and here she was in the middle of it. She’s never been to Siberia, this wasn’t how she wanted her first time to be, entering a Hydra facility. It had been long abandoned, rust creeping through the steel walls, surprisingly she felt the air become warm as she walked in deeper. She looked around not knowing which direction to go, but she hears metals clashing, signaling presence, it did not sound friendly. She swallowed as she came across soldiers lined up inside glass enclosures only to find bullet holes in their heads, she hated how she had to learn this by herself, when she trusted someone to tell her everything just as she would with him. She walked faster, almost ran when she saw Bucky on the floor, his metal arm obliterated, and Steve on top of Tony, his shield on the center of his suit, light slowly fading from it. Blood was oozing from their cheeks, and just as he was about to hit him with another blow of his vibranium disk, she put her arm up and blast him into wall, ice covering his mucky suit. He looks up and he feels the same betrayal she does. Tony lets a sigh of relief but anguish still obvious in his eyes. Torment etched in Y/N’s expression.

“Y/N,” Steve calls in surprise as he looks at her intensely.

“Why didn’t you tell me about him?” She replies, her tone venomous, she wanted to be gentle but her mouth was failing her. She shot a quick glance at Bucky who was lying on the ground.

“You wouldn’t have understood.” Steve replies, seemingly hiding behind his helmet, but she could tell his emotions underneath. She looks up as her lips twitched, her eyebrows closing in, clearly Steve didn’t know who she was. How could someone she’s spent most of her time with not know her enough to trust her.

“Then make me,” desperation in her voice, she wanted to understand, she wanted to because she loved him, but her eyes were already shining, tears threatening to exit. If he only could’ve told her earlier she would’ve helped him, done everything in her power to help him, if he was doing the right thing why was he running away from her? She knows she would’ve understood, she would’ve but he didn’t give her the chance to.

“He’s the only one I’ve got left from my old life, he’s got no one Y/N,” Steve looked down, only to glance up at her again as tears streamed down her face. She felt like a child lied to, too dumb to understand anything that the best way he thought going about things was to keep it from her. He thought her too weak to grasp anything, it felt like treason.

They looked battered, she didn’t know how to sink everything happening in front of her, but she knew who she wanted to come home with her, the friend she would always be willing to risk her life for, just as she knew he would when it came to her.

“Then you must think so little of me if you think I wouldn’t understand that,” she frosted the tears that dripped from her eyes, falling into the concrete like glass. She looked wounded but ire replaced it without warning. She walked towards Tony and held his head, searching his body for fatalities. Steve stood up in anguish and dejection, he didn’t know if he was disappointed in her or himself. Y/N knew he would never have the strength to fight her, but it was something she was ready in an instant for. As Steve walked over to help Bucky up from where he was lying, she quickly made her way to stand and stop them but Tony pulled her back. She stared at him eyebrows raised in confusion, she wanted to avenge him, and he knew that but his eyes signaled her to stand down.

“That shield doesn’t belong to you, you don’t deserve it,” his words are fire to Steve’s ears. “My father made that shield!” In a second the shield dropped on the floor, a loud clang writhed through their ears. Y/N couldn’t believe it, all of a sudden, he felt different, or maybe she never knew him at all. There he was with Bucky at his shoulder, their bodies slowly dimming into the background leaving what he thought was his friend what and she thought was his lover.

                                                       - - - - - - - -

She felt stupid, embarrassed really, she felt like she was a stranger intruding on something important, and it was. Steve’s eyes lit up as a newly blonde figure walked up to him as she put her arms on his shoulders and his on her waist. Y/N knew she should go, walk away as quickly as she could, but she couldn’t. She was torturing herself looking at the two of them and she couldn’t pull herself away.

“Hey, you.” Steve greets her as he pulls her close, their noses lightly touching.

“You seem a little taken aback seeing her again, are you sure you’re okay?”

“You jealous?” he gives her a sly smile as Nat hit his arm jokingly.

“We all know she was the one who got away,” her tone expressionless.

“You’re the one I caught, and I have no intention of letting you get away.” Y/N quickly turned to one of the posts, her back against the wall. Her breathing heavy, she didn’t want to cry, she can’t, she wouldn’t let herself feel weak, but that’s just what she was. She looked up the ceiling as her chest raised up and down as she panted. She kept her head up trying to keep the water from her eyes from falling. She was withering, she wanted to disappear. This was the last time she would chase him, she felt foolish even thinking of walking to him expecting a warm reunion, she felt foolish to even think of him. She made her way back to her room and the moment she closed the door behind her, all the flowers he gave her were freed from the cold glitter preserving them, the moist of the daffodil seeping through the softbound copy blurring the image of the cover, but she didn’t care. All those years without him, Y/N kept waiting for a sign if she should forget him, and tonight, it came mercilessly. As she huddled on the edge of her bed hugging her knees, she sobbed harder than the day she lost him. It’s true, she’s never known anything about Steve the whole time he’s been with her, she thought of so many ways to let him open up to her but he just couldn’t, maybe that’s the comfort he found in Nat, and maybe it was time to let him go.

Part 2  | Check out my other stuff? M A S T E R L I S T

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