marketing-wtf

Things that will make me pay $20/month for Tidal

  • More non-American music in their catolog (ex. Kpop, Jpop, African pop etc)
  • I can download a song with no extra charge to my already $20/month fee
  • Along with the Music Videos all DVD/documentary footage to watch exclusively on Tidal
  • Tidal can be accessed on mobile devices, gaming systems and satellite radio
  • A lyrics interface so I can sing along to the music
  • Exclusive giveaways such as backstage passes from the artists through the Tidal app
  • Independent musicians supporting and speaking up for the service
  • Somebody talking about how great the service is and how convenient it is for their everyday life

Things that will NOT make me pay $20/month for Tidal

  • Artists changing their twitters to an ugly color
  • Alicia Keys giving out a HS graduation speech
  • Watching Jay-Z do something Lucious Lyon was planning to do for Empire
  • Taylor Swift (I could just buy all her albums on CD for like $30 and call it a day)
  • Powerful speeches all about the music and the artist (with little to no mention about the consumer..us)
  • A 30 second video giving me illuminati goosebumps
  • Reiterated benefits of creating a music playlist with the click of the button that can be done the same with any other music service. 
  • Having only 1 benefit that makes Tidal different than the rest (High Sound Quality)
  • Only high profile people telling me that the service is good 

Acer debuts the Selfie Hat at London Fashion Week

If you thought you had seen if all when it comes to wearable tech, prepare for a very rude awakening. For London Fashion Week, Acer has collaborated with a designer on what it’s calling a Selfie Hat: a bright and sparkling pink hat with a tablet hanging off of it (specifically, Acer’s Iconia A1-840). There’s also a matching, non-wearable tablet case with a hat on top of it too.

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In 2009, Binder Park Zoo in Michigan decided to capitalize on the erotic world of animal fucking by inviting 30 couples to drink champagne and watch some beasties get it on. Tour guides would then regale couples with animal sex stories, such as how you can make cheetahs horny using Jovan Musk perfume. Or they could just watch monkeys dong it up right in front of their stupid human faces. And that’s not an exaggeration – according to that link, some of the primates like to bone “as close as possible to the spectators.”

But what if you’re one of the unlucky ones who didn’t get to see a yak sling some dick? Don’t worry your pretty little head about it none – they have a DVD presentation at the end of the tour. Nobody gets cheated at Binder Park Zoo, baby. You came to see some animal fucking, and by god, you’re going to see some animal fucking.

5 Horrifying Valentine’s Day Promotions You Won’t Believe