K, but as the original Mauruaders fancast is getting a bit old now - I propose a change.

Originally posted by moviethingsandstuff

1. Joel Courtney - Remus Lupin ^

Originally posted by tomhollahoe

2. Tom Holland - James Potter ^

Originally posted by anissagraces

3. Diego Tinoco - Sirius Black ^

Originally posted by isophhia

4. Harry Kirton - Peter Pettigrew ^

Originally posted by rubyfinnie

5. Alex Lawther - Severus Snape ^


Anyway, just an idea, you do you boo but you can bet I’m gonna be imagining Joel Courtney as Remus when I’m writing fics

Studying [S.B.]

Character: Sirius Black
Word Count: 3066
Requested?: Yes/No
Summary: Sirius tries to prove his worth by studying for an upcoming Transfiguration exam - all to impress Y/n.
WARNING: Couple of swears and a small section of very mild smut - more of a make out than anything but hints of more (I kind of enjoyed writing it, does anyone want me to try my hand at a full on smut piece? Lmk!)
Disclaimer: Gif isn’t mine, credit to whoever made it

A/n: Requester asked for Ravenclaw reader, however I think that any house would fit in as none is specified. Also I have added a ‘read more’ but I’m pretty sure it’s not working on mobile at the moment. Anyhow, happy reading!

Originally posted by tanrininprezervatifi

+ + + + +

His lips were on yours, a drug that sucked you in, his touch was like fire dancing across your skin. You knew you shouldn’t be doing this, but it felt so good to let go for once. He trailed hot wet kisses across your jaw and down your neck, sucking on the soft skin lightly, just enough to leave a mark.

“I am so gonna regret this in the morning,” you giggled, before letting out a soft moan as his teeth gently grazed across your skin. “You’ll get over it,” Sirius muttered, his voice deep and husky. As he pulled his shirt over his head, he pushed you carefully down onto the bed, before climbing on top of you and reattaching his lips to yours, pressing his chest against you.

He nibbled softly at your lower lip, sucking on it as he began to pull your underwear down, fingertips running along your inner thigh. He moved slowly south, running his tongue down to your chest.

Maybe you’d regret this in the morning, but right now, him and his tongue were all you could focus on. And Merlin did they make you feel good.

Keep reading

meandminniemcg  asked:

A Wolfstar & Jily Prompt: Lily had suspected it, but James had said: "Sirius and Remus? No! If you were right, I would be the first to know."

I think I rekindled my love for jily (or is it just Lily Evans? y’all know I love my gIRL)


He and Lily were studying in the library one night when James received his first shock. “So, how long have Moony and Padfoot been together?” His girlfriend asked. He still couldn’t quite believe that the woman had agreed to go out with him, let alone say yes when he asked her to be his girlfriend.

James kept his eyes on the book he was sifting through while he answered. “Um, we all met in first year.”

Lily laughed. “No, I meant how long have they been dating?”

He jerked his head up so fast that his glasses skewed. “Dating? Wh- wha- what dating?”

“Well, they aren’t exactly subtle about it.” Said Lily.

“Sirius and Remus? No! If you were right, I’d’ve been the first to know.” He exclaimed.

“Please, they’re so touchy with each other! They hold hands practically all the time-”

“That’s just a Moony-Padfoot thing. It’s what they do!” James interrupted.

“They look at each other like they’re the only people in the world. It’s so obvious! How do you not see it?” She said calmly. He knew they’d only been dating for a few months, but James found that one thing he admired about Lily was her patience, which she’d desperately need if she was going to be dating him.

James sputtered a bit more. “You’re wrong.” was all he could think to say.

“Excuse me?”

“They’re not dating. They would’ve told me. I mean, Sirius is my best friend, innhe?”

Lily sighed and rolled her eyes, letting her head rest on her boyfriend’s shoulder. “If you say so.” She was clearly too exhausted to argue, and for good reason since they’d been studying for three hours now.

“Let’s get to bed, yeah?” James suggested. She nodded against him, not opening her eyes until a startling green was looking up at him. He leaned in to kiss her quickly and smiled dopily. They walked back to the Gryffindor common room hand in hand in comfortable silence.

When they entered, they spotted two familiar faces asleep by the fireplace. Remus ended up with his head on Sirius’s shoulder and Sirius leaning on Remus’s head, snoring. James looked back at Lily who raised an eyebrow. “Not dating, huh?”

Over the course of the next week, James focused on his best friends. How they acted around each other, how they spoke at each other, how they stared at each other.

… Maybe Lily was right. Though he wouldn’t know until they told him or he asked them. So, lacking the patience that his girlfriend had, he went with the latter. James saw the two boys sat on the couch in the common room and Lily sitting in an armchair next to them with a book.

With a determined air about him, James strode over and sat at the coffee table so he was facing Sirius and Remus. “Are you two dating?” He felt a book, thankfully paperback, hit the side of his head. James turned his head to see Lily shaking hers ever so slightly.

“What did you just ask us?” Remus questioned quietly. Sirius stayed silent, shock strewn about his face.

James was about to ask him again when Lily pick up her book and pulled him away. “You can’t just ask them that!” She whispered and smacked him across his arm with her book. “They have to be ready. How insensitive are you?”

“On a scale of one to ten?” Lily smacked him again. “Oi! Alright it wasn’t the best thing to do, but I was curious! You brought it up, so technically it’s your fault!”

“It- Your- Fault- You- Git!” She said, hitting him in between words.

“Umm, guys?” They heard Sirius call. He waved them over. Once they were both sat on the table in front of them, Sirius held Remus’s hand. “Your father and I have something to tell you.” Remus elbowed him playfully in the side. Sirius laughed. “Yes, we are dating.”

“Huh.” James said. “Alright. For how long?”

“We started about a month before you and Lily got together.” James nodded. “By the way, how did you figure it out?”

“Oh, I didn’t. Lily did.” He pointed to her and she bat his finger away with her book. “Ow! Why do you keep hitting me?”

“Because you’re a prat. I want it to be made clear that I thought you weren’t trying to hide it and I didn’t think that this idiot would go bothering you about it.”

“You seem to have underestimated Prongs’s tendency to do things he’s not supposed to do.” Remus added.

“And that,” Said Lily as she kissed James on the cheek. “Is the only thing I’ve ever been wrong about.”

Changing Starlight PT.4

(James and Peter and played by @marvelousmisterscamander)

Keep reading

Schemes ~ pt. 9
External image

A/N: Okay yes, I am a sucker for Dominic Sherwood but he just makes the perfect Mucliber okay. At least that is how I imagine him to be Now I know this part is kind of meh but I am planning next one to be more…well….I’ll just confuse you more with the next part but I can’t wait to hear about this one. Send me back some feedback. Feed me…back. No, jk ( not really) Anyways sorry for such a delay on everything. I’ve been just struggling with school and stress and all that. It really gets me down so I’m slow on everything.

TAGS: @siriusly-loves-snuffles, @slither-in-a-half, @nadinissavage, @shadyladyperfection, @geeksareunique, @ashkuuuu, @xinyourdreamsx, @maralisa124, @loserslytherpuff, @chloe-geoghegan, @heritier-de-la-ravenclaw, @musekala, @moonysmilkshake, @shadyladyperfection, @all-throughthe-night, @laraurora, @ crispyfrenchfrieschrisis

Other parts —> MASTERLIST

xx

Jealousy is complicated but so are feelings. They can change you and they can deceive you, grow or disappear but they are still there, no matter how much you try to ignore them.

Sirius. He was always around his best friend, James. He thought of him as a brother since the moment they met on the Hogwarts Express. He is flirty, charming, mischievous but he is also loyal and honest. A friend like him is hard to find.

James. He like a gin to Sirius’ tonic. They were inseparable and he thought of Sirius as much of a brother as Sirius did of him. That is why as much as he tried to brush off the guilt he’s been hiding inside. He felt like a terrible friend and the worst kind of brother. Remus liked you, there was no doubt, and when Sirius started to fancy you too he told himself he is not going to be involved in this. But he got pulled in and he’s stuck in this as much as Remus and Sirius are.

He hasn’t talked to you since that day. He hasn’t seen you either but when he wanted to see you, he definitely didn’t want for you to be in the arms of another boy.

“ Stop! Please! “ you continued to squeak and laugh as he grabbed you by the waist and continued to twirl you around. “ I can’t breathe.” you continued to laugh in his arms as he laughed along.

“ That is for not taking this studying seriously.” he grinned and continued to hold you in his arms until you finally gave in. You leaned back on his chest and he let out one of his adorable snorts of laughter. He held you in his arms, looking down at you and grinning.“ You are such a baby.”  

Getting back on your feet, you crinkled your nose up to him and grinned. “ Yeah but an adorable one.” you winked and grabbed the books back in your lap as you sat down on the couch. He sat beside you with one arm supporting your head and his other holding a notebook. 

He gave you a wonderful, kind smile before turning his eyes on the notebook, reading it through. You blushed at hi touch. You haven’t got a clue why a boy like him would make your heart beat so fast. Usually, he wore sweaters or jumpers, today he wore a ripped T-shirt which you assumed belonged to Sirius. Apparently, boys exchange clothes just like girls. The black shirt showed off his biceps, biceps you didn’t know he had. His broad tapered shoulders were showing as well as the scars that strtched over. The black beanie on his head didn’t help. He never wore beanies but you had to admit you loved the way it messed up his hair.

He was focused on his book, eyes scanning the sentences as you continued to get distracted by his strong cedarwood cologned combined with flourish smells. Roses and violets as well as cucumbers.

“ Remus..”

“ Yes, dear.”

Your heart skipped a beat after he said that word. It sounded so beautiful rolling off his tongue.

“ I can’t focus.” you mumbled with a smirk on your lips.

A smile showed on his lips as his eyes haven’t left the book. “ There is some chocolate in my room. Do you want me to get it?” he finally looked up into your eyes and saw the lust you hid behind. You bit your lower lip as the sight of his soft ones seemed to create some deeper feeling in your stomach.

You couldn’t. You can’t. But you want to.

He realized the situation he was in. You were pressed so close to him as the only thing standing between the two of you was a Transfiguration book. His heart started to race in his chest and at the sight of you, his breath got almost taken away.

He was close and he wanted it just like you did.

“ Moony! “ Sirius shouted and the moment was ruined, causing both of you to fall back against the couch.

Both Sirius and James saw the moment the two of you shared and as much as they wanted Remus to make a move on you all those years ago, they couldn’t. Sirius fancied you, James felt something towards you as well and they didn’t like what was in front of them. 

Sirius knew how much he liked you. He felt towards you something he hasn’t felt with just any girl. You challanged him and he could have never backed away from the challange. He squeezed himself right between the two of you as James pulled himself a chair.

It was awkward. It was awkward and uncomfortable because there were three boys in the room, best friends, and you got involved with every each one of them.

You know what you thought of yourself at the very moment. A slut. It’s a harsh word but it got you thinking. You flirted with Sirius, slept with James and just a moment ago you wanted to kiss Remus. It was so complicated and you were so lost right now. 

“ I-I .. I should get going.” you stammered and quickly got on your feet, grabbing the bag and the books from the table.

“ Leaving so soon, Sparkles? ” there was a harsh tone coming from him but you brushed it off.

“ What about the essay?” 

“ But you just got here..”

You turned around and simpered at the boys. “ I- I.. I’ll see you guys later.” 

—-

You didn’t know what you felt right now. You knew it was some kind of version of sadness and anger combined together. Tears seemed to roll down your cheeks automatically and on your way out you seemed to bump into another boy. Peter Pettigrew.

“ Oh, for fuck’s sake.” you cursed and quickly wiped the falling tears away from your cheeks.

Peter took a step back and quickly shied away. Your response seemed to make him feel uncomfortable and guilty as he has done something wrong to you. 

You noticed the position you put him in and quickly apologized. “ Sorry, Peter. It’s not you, I just have a lot of things on my mind. “

“ It’s okay.” he showed a light smile and brightened the expression until he saw your wet cheeks. “ Are you okay? “ he sounded a bit concern, something he felt like he needed to ask.

“ Yeah, fine. Fine. Thanks.” you murmured quickly and exaggerated a smile to which he saw right through. “ Anyways, I should get going. Sorry again for bumping into you.”

“ It’s okay. “ he spoke shyly but you were already gone from the sight.

It wasn’t a secret that you were best friends with Regulus. The two of you were close like shirt and pants. That’s why James, Sirius, and Remus all knew where to look for you.

“ Hey, Regulus! “ shouted Remus and ran over to the boy with heavy books in his arms.

“ Lupin? What brings you to these quarters? “ Regulus quirked an eyebrow at him.

“ I was thinking if you know where (y/n) might be? I know the two of you are friends and all..”

“ Aren’t you two friends too? “

“ Well, yes of course- khm- but like- um- the two of you are in the same house and - well, we- she hasn’t been in any of her classes..”

Regulus continued to stare at Remus stumble through his own words. Not because he was confused or that he didn’t know what he wanted but because of pure fun to see Remus Lupin blushing from embarrassment.

“ So you want me to what? “ he continued to play dull.

Remus flushed even more, turning his gaze away from Regulus and scratching the back of his neck. “ Well, I - uhm- “

“ Isn’t it obvious, Black? He wants you to tell him where she is.” James retorded, walking around the corner and standing by his mate.

“ She’s in her dorm. “ Regulus replied plainly.

“ Well, duh. Where else could she be? “ James rolled his eyes and put his hand on Remus’ shoulder.

“ I believe Sirius is hiding behind that corner too.” Regulus glanced to the corner where another boy was lurking behind. “ Hello, brother.”

“ Come out, Pads. Don’t be a wuss and bring your pathetic arse over here.” shouted James annoyed.

Before Sirius could walk over, Regulus looked at Remus and showed him a sly smirk. “ The password is Serpent. She is in her dorm, probably with a friend of mine. “

“ Okay, thanks Regulus.” Remus smiled and turned to his best friends.

Sirius had a plain smile on his lips. He wasn’t too happy of seeing his brother and realizing how estranged they have become. 

“ You think it’s this one? ”

“ Probably not since her name is engraved in the door. Must be Snivellus’. “ Sirius retorded sarcastically.

“ You two are morons. “ Remus rolled his eyes and pushed the door open. 

“ (y/n) ?” James spoke carefully but was immediately shut up from all the hundreds of live bunnies hopping around the room.

Two students were laying on the ground, giggling and laughing at the bunnies who hopped on their chest and stomach. You sat up carefully, looking up at the three boys and beaming. “ Hi, guys! “

“ The blood hell, (y/n). Wha-”

“ Bunnies! “ Sirius chirped, interrupting James and throwing himself in the pile of fluffy furballs while James and Remus stood there, bewildered by the sight.

You chuckled at Sirius and pointed at the rabbit next to him. “ Oh my god, Sirius! Take the black one with the white spot on top. He’s such a cuddler! “ you smiled and tapped the boy next to you on the stomach to get up.

As soon as he sat up, looking at the three boys with devilment in his eyes and an innocent smile plastered on his lips. “ Well, well… If it isn’t the Gryffindor trio.”

His appearance shut them up quite nicely. If it wasn’t for the bunnies around him, Sirius would be more than just tensed up. Remus was a bit confused while James was inragerd. “ Mulciber.” he spat out harshly.

Seeing how the tension seemed to build in the room, you crawled up from the pile and walked over to Sirius, distracting him with more bunnies. “ Now, boys. Play nice.” you smiled and started petting the bunny in Sirius’ hands. “ Hey, little bunny.” you cooed and scratched behind his ear.

Sirius kept his eyes on Mulciber but when your hand finds its way to his bicep while the other was on the bunny, he couldn’t help himself but get distracted by you. You were so happy, so joyful, full of smiles and bubbles. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. 

“ (y/n)? Can we talk to you? “ Remus spoke and you looked up at him.

“ Sure. Shoot.” you smiled and kept your eyes on the bunny.

“ Uhm, it’s kind of private..”

“ I am not leaving her.” Mulciber spoke determined, crossing his arms over his chest and standing his ground.

“ Well, that’s not your choice to make.” James snarled back and took a step forward.

“ He can stay.” you spoke gently and soft, looking up at Mulciber and smiling at him.

Mulciber smirked at James while James only felt the need to punch him in pathetic smug face of his.

“ Peter said you were quite upset few days ago. The day the two of us were working on our essay. He said you were crying.” said Remus, ignoring the tension between James and Mulciber, while he knelt down to you and Sirius.

“ I was yeah. It wasn’t a big deal, just a moment…I guess.” you replied glumly, keeping the smile on your lips while you petted the rabbit.

But Sirius saw right through that smile. Something was eating you up. Guilt, perhaps? But what could you be guilty of? He was okay with you and Regulus being best friends. He was actually happy Regulus was not alone and had a good influence around. 

“ What’s he doing here? “ James spoke harshly through his gritted teeth.

“ He..” you stood up, leaving Remus’ and Sirius’ side and interlacing your arm around Mulcibers’. “ ..is here for the Malfoy gala. “ you turned your gaze to Mulciber and crinkled your nose. “ He’s going as well so we thought we’d go together.”

“ And since you twats upset her I thought that before we leave,  I should cheer her up in her bubbly old self.” he glared at the boys and started walking towards the door.

“ See you guys around. “ you beamed and walked through the door before walking back and looking at them with a favor in your eyes. “ And could you….like…not be caught with this..”  you glanced at the bunnies and gave them an apologetic smile.

Yes, jealusy is complicated. It can decieve and blind other people with rage. But people accept their jealusy differently and each boy in that room did. They accepted it differently. Rage, sorrow and ignorance.

10:17am

They were never up before noon on the weekends, so it was strange that all of them in the Great Hall at a socially acceptable breakfast hour. Almost all of them.

Sirius— sauntering in a good twenty minutes after the rest of them, bedhead, sleepy smile. Coming up behind Marlene and pressing a chaste kiss to the top of her head.

“Oi, James!” Sounds of annoyance muffled by french toast, making Sirius chuckle.

“Don’t tell me you forgot we had practice today.” This time: an audible ‘fuck me’ followed by the clatter of silverware. Giggles from Lily, expletives from James. Kissing her quickly, ‘bye, love,’ then scrambling up from the table and joining Sirius.

An awkward silence, waiting for Marlene to break it but it’s clear she isn’t going to be the first to speak. Lily is, clearing her throat and asking nervously:

“Have you two made up, then?”

A shrug, noncommital, causing Lily to roll her eyes. Something that does not go unnoticed.

“What, you want me to give you a play by play of what happened?” Narrowing her eyes at Lily, an accusatory glare. “Right— well, we went in his bedroom. And then he took off his—“

“As fascinating as this is, I’m afraid I have to—“

“Me too! Later, guys!” Remus and Peter practically springing up from their seats, flustered.

“You’re not off the hook, you know.” Marlene’s turn to roll her eyes, exasperated.

“I don’t know what you want, Lil,” she says pointedly.

“I asked if you made up, not made love.”

Another eye roll, and then: “First off, Sirius and I don’t ‘make love.’” Air quotes around the words, her voice resentful. “And I’m starting to think that’s the problem.”

Lily learned a long time ago not to interrupt Marlene, to just watch her lay out her thoughts and silently try to make sense of them. Watching intently, patiently.

“I don’t even know if he loves me.”

“Marlene—“ Speaking softly, despite her better judgement.

“I’m serious,” she says, looking Lily dead in the eye. Challenging her.

“Okay,” is all she can muster; the furthest thing from the truth but that’s what she’s supposed to say.

Marlene downs the last of her orange juice and leaves, her face unchanging. Matter-of-fact, it is what it is.

When the world isn’t Tumblr

I sometimes forget that Harry Potter wasn’t all about the marauders. I just assume everyone knows about my obsession with them but they don’t.

I was talking to this girl and she said she loved Harry Potter and I was thinking, “I can’t wait to talk to her about Remus and Sirius and James and Peter”

But she started talking about Harry and I’m like ????!?! People like Harry Potter (which is who the books are mostly about lmao why wouldn’t people love him) more then the Marauder’s ??!?!

But then I realized, No, Adisson, not EVERYONE loves the mauraders like you do.

you know that feeling when you have like 36 fanfics ideas but then you start writing and you can’t finish the first chapter of any of them and you feel like your mind is falling apart

Home ~ pt 5

A/N: Oh well, oh well. I finished another one in my drafts instead of studying but my dad was kind of distracting me so I couldn’t study. But I am going now, I swear. Afte I post this, go pee and drink some coffee. Love you guys <3 (also sorry if i forgot to tag someone.)

TAGS: @siriusly-loves-snuffles, @slither-in-a-half, @nadinissavage, @shadyladyperfection, @geeksareunique, @ashkuuuu, @xinyourdreamsx, @maralisa124, @loserslytherpuff, @chloe-geoghegan, @heritier-de-la-ravenclaw, @musekala, @moonysmilkshake

Other parts —> MASTERLIST

Xx

It was so quiet. You were so used to sleeping to the sound of television that in the moment of silence you felt nothing more but awake.

Pressing your finger on the bruised and cut lip, made you grimace at how it stung. The dark purple bruises around your neck suffocated you. Each time you saw them you felt ugly, even worse, you felt weak. The pain, the weakness, the memories… Can it be even worse?

Without a warning, the compartment door burst open and your best friend rushed in. You tried to cover the bruises on your neck with your Slytherin scarf but it was too late.

She saw it but instead of saying something about it, she ignored it. “Hey, can we join in?” She smiled at you with her boyfriend by her side.

Did she really not care? Did she really not care about the bruises on your neck and the scars over your face. The cut lip, the scars…

They both entered the compartment without your consent. To be completely honest you wanted to be alone right now. Alone and with your own thoughts. So yes, she was your friend, your best friend, a sister, but if she didn’t care enough then why bother staying with her and her boyfriend. Instead, you stood up, packed up your things and left.

Was there a single place where you can be alone, scream or just cry? - There wasn’t so you joined someone else instead. They were strangers, sleeping. Probably because of the party they must have had during the holidays but they let you sit along. They were nice, laying in the compartment seats, hungover and completely worn out but they let you stay anyway.

Charming two Hufflepuffs, pulling in their snores with stamps of clubs present on their arms.

You chuckled at them. Normal teenage boys, students like you. Well, almost like you.

—-

Max and you never spoke again. It was a simple friendship going down the drain. She didn’t care enough, she simply didn’t and you kept it hidden away. With charms that you could find or the potions that you drank.

The pain was everywhere. In your shoulder to your back, legs, feet, everywhere… You took some Muggle pills if you had to, mixed them with a healing potion but the pain wasn’t physical anymore. It soon became internal.

—-

James was happy. He was happy about his friends and family, about his grades and love life. Everything was going great but to him, it felt like something was missing.

He couldn’t place it but he knew he was missing something. The problem was that he didn’t know what.

Until one night he thought hard. He felt sick of the curious feeling trying to reach out and when the realization finally hit him, he jumped to his feet and ran through the door. He didn’t know how or in what way he landed on his feet at the very moment but he did and the good thing was it was morning and the classes started.

He scanned the hall more times than he can count but the only person he could see was Max and not the girl he was truly looking for.

“Oi, Maxy! Can I have a word with you?” He spoke without waiting for her to turn around.

She smiled widely at him but also knew what he wanted to ask her, so the smile didn’t stick on for long.

“ I was wondering if you talked to (y/n) by any chance. I know she is not attending any of her classes and since the two of you are so close I thought I might ask you.” He spoke without even trying to catch some breath and fill his lungs with air.

“ We actually haven’t talked since the holidays ended.” She felt a bit uncomfortable as she said it.

Of course, she missed you. She invited you to her house at the beginning of term but due to her parents wanting to meet her boyfriend during that time, she had to cancel your plans and leave you to go home to your dad.

She didn’t know what she had done. She never truly understood the pain you held inside. And now, the guilt was eating her alive.

“ I thought the two of you had fun. What happened? Did your dad freak her out? "He tried to joke around which only made Max feel worse about her decision.

Before the holidays started you simply asked her who to choose. You or Regulus. And apparently, you weren’t enough to be chosen.

” We…I mean she-she went home for the holidays. “

” What do you mean she went home for the holidays? “ his expression suddenly fell and a knot formed in his stomach. ” She told me she’s staying with you.“

” Um- we kind of had an argument before the holidays started and it didn’t end well..“

” So you let her go home?!“ he started to get more irritated by the answers.

” I- they wanted to meet Regulus and she was not taking it well.“

” Of course she didn’t take it well. Her mom and sister left. Her dad is a fucking drunk.“

” I wanted them to meet Regulus, James! Not some girl with issues! “ she blurted out and immediately shut up. She sighed and tried to look up at him before speaking. ” I’m sorry, I di-“

” Wow..“ you marveled at her ignorance. They both turned around to see you standing behind, hurt by the things she just spoke through her teeth. ” So, I’m just a girl with issues. Is that all I have been to you for the past six years.“

” (y/n). I didn’t -“

"Sisters. That was what we called ourselves. ” you swallowed thickly the lump in your throat before a tear rolled down your cheek. “ But I guess it was just a fucking lie. ”

“ I- no! It’s not a lie! ” she quickly denied. “ You..you’re just always sad and depressed and I miss having the fun (y/n) around. The one that smiles all the time and writes letters to her sister. The one who send Howlers to her and she send you, even more, funnier and crazy Howlers. (y/n), the girl that always makes me smile, even on my bad days.”

“ The fun (y/n).” you scoffed and crossed your arms over your chest. “ There is no fun (y/n), or sad (y/n) or happy or fucked up (y/n)! There is only (y/n).  One, not ten of them and yeah, I love knowing I make you smile all the time but have you ever thought that sometimes I would want to be cheered up as well, not be replaced by your fucking boyfriend! One (y/n), who needs her best friend more than everything right now, not to see her disappear when times get rough. What Kind of a friend are you? ”

“ I- I”

“ No! You chose already. You don’t get to have my trust after you threw it away. ” you finished and turned to James, pointing your finger at his chest. “ And you. You don’t get to tell other people about my family. I don’t want somebody else pitying me.”  and with that, you stormed out.

He stormed after you though. He couldn’t leave alone the fact that your face was beaten up. He heard the words you said to him a while ago but he ignored them for now. You were hurting, a lot, and he hated himself for not realizing this sooner.

As soon as he caught up with you, he grabbed you by the arm and you yelped from the pain it caused you.  It wasn’t him, it was the bruise your father left it.

“ The hell?” he took a hold of it once again after you pushed it away.  He pulled up your sleeve gently and uncovered the purple bruise spread all over.

“ James-” you tried to say something, something that would just leave this alone but you had no idea how to say it.

“Who did this?” He didn’t even let you speak before brushing his thumb over your lip, making you grimace at the pain after his touch.

“James, it-”

“Did he do this?”

You stayed quiet for a while before answering him. Leaning into his touch, his warm touch that seemed to make you feel all kind of emotions, you looked up at his eyes. He was worried and concerned but you didn’t want to share your experience with him. At least not now while everything was still so fresh.  "It was an accident.“

"An accident?” He looked at you with disbelief. “I don’t believe it was an accident.” He started to get angry. “ So was it him?”

You continued to stay silent. “It doesn’t matter.” You muttered and brushed his hand away from your bruise.

“It doesn’t matter!?” He scoffed. “Of course it matters. It matters to me! You matter to me!” He started fuming.

But that was when he said those words and you felt nothing else but rage. “ Screw you, James! SCREW YOU! “

“ The fuck, (y/n)?!”

“ I said screw you.” your voice started to shake. “ You don’t understand and you will never understand how true pain feels like! Ever! It’s not about the bruises and it’s not about what he did to me. It’s what everybody does to me in here!” you started to shout, pointing your finger at your head. “ I am tired, James. Exhausted!  And as much as you think you care, you don’t! Do you want to know how I know that? Because it doesn’t take someone to notice the other in a week. It took you a week to talk to me! A week! And I’m tired, James! I’m so tired all the time! I can’t sleep or eat and I feel like I can’t even breathe! So leave me the hell alone!” you finished and ran off

“(Y/n)! (Y/n)! ” he shouted from behind and started to run after you. “Come back here!”

But you didn’t. You snuck in the broom closet, take a few pills for the pain, a potion over and you were good to go. You were good.

You were good. All was good.

Pain, pressure, stress, anxiety. Pills, potion. Better.

You felt better.

Charm hid the scars and you were good to go. You were good. No more pain, no more dark feeling. You were high on the painkillers and the scent the potion left you running through your body.

Sometimes you felt like you could fly. Your feet were so light, so easy to walk with. It was okay for a while. The first three classes weren’t that bad but then the pain started to erupt back on the surface and you felt worse again.

You held the two pills in your hand and switching them between your fingers. You took two already today. It wouldn’t be smart to take another two.

You weren’t an addict. You weren’t. You just wanted to numb the pain.

Not an addict.

Two pills are too much.

But the pain. It’s for the pain.

You threw the pills in your mouth and a potion over, swallowing them than turning to your next class. The pain stopped and you felt better.

Did you though?

As soon as the effect hit, everything started to become a blur before you could even reach your desk. You clawed the edge of someone’s desk, trying to stop vertigo in your head but it kept hurting. It was like someone was poking you in the head and it hurt. It hurt so much you were ready to cry, sob, scream…

Max, who was in the same class as you, looked up at you watching as you struggled with your own balance. She sat there, watching. She didn’t do a single thing but just watch you struggle.

A Hufflepuff put his hand on your arm asked worriedly. “(Y/n)? Are you okay?” his voice was gentle and soft.

You knew him. He sounded familiar.

His name…what was his name?

“ Thomas..” you mumbled, looking at him with a weak smile and trying to stay on your feet.

“ (y/n)? ”

“I-… my heart- ” you grabbed the shirt which covered your chest and he immediately wrapped his arms around you, stabilizing you.

“ We’re going to Madam Pomfrey.” He ordered and helped you exit the class.

“My heart- it aches.” You continued to mumble and he only lifted you up in his arms and started walking faster to the hospital wing.

“ Hold on, (y/n). Stay awake.” His voice was calm even though his heart was racing and his thoughts were panicking. “Don’t close your eyes.”

Four pills. That is how much you took today. Right? Or was it two more?

“ No. Eyes open, love. Keep your eyes open.” He smiled down at you but your eyelids started to feel so heavy you could barely keep them open.

“We’re here. We’re here.” His voice started to fade away slowly and the dark spread in front of your eyes.

“Finally.”

10:17am

“So you and Marlene are on again.” Not a question, an observation.

Walking down to the quidditch pitch. Savoring the cool air, dew covering the grass; knowing that in a few hours’ time they’ll be sunburnt, sweaty. They’re early— not even the captain is there yet.

“Yeah,” is all he says, not the response James was looking for.

“Never really off though, are you? I feel like you’ve been dating for ages.” Pressing further when Sirius doesn’t respond: “Kinda nice, a love like that; you guys always come back to each other no matter what happens. Not that Lily and I aren’t like that, but—“

“I don’t know anything about her, Prongs.” He had stopped walking, staring straight ahead. James turning to face him, grabbing his shoulder and shaking lightly.

“What do you mean?”

“What’s Lily’s favorite color?”

“Green and purple— she likes pastels, spring colors.” His face falling slightly when he realizes what Sirius is implying. “Padfoot, that doesn’t mean anything and you know it. Just because your girlfriend doesn’t talk about what flowers she wants at your wedding doesn’t mean—“

“We don’t talk about weddings. We don’t talk about anything serious.”

“You talk loads about yourself— that’s pretty Sirius.”

“James.”

“Sorry, had to.” A sigh, before continuing: “Talk to her, then.”

“Yeah,” is all he says, and this time James doesn’t have time to push. Their teammates were walking down to the field, laughing and joking around. The sun was coming out. All boisterous, loud, bright things— eclipsing their gloominess just for a little while.

“Your father is alive in you, Harry, and shows himself most plainly when you need of him. How else could you produce that particular Patronus? Prongs rode again last night.”
( Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban)


Happy Birthday James (27 March, 1960)

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Mischief Managed ❤