man tip

TIPS FOR SHOPPING FOR YOUR TRANS BOYFRIEND

Just some tips I’ve learned over the years to help with my boyfriend’s dysphoria

•vertical stripes (makes you seem taller)
•uneven patterns such as polka dots (hides any chest bumps)
•jackets, sweaters, or vests (layers hide curves. But be sure they’re not too long. Oversized clothes make you seem smaller. Hem should be no more than 2 inches below waist)
•graphic T shirt (make sure design is higher up on the chest to hide any chest bumps)
•pants (straight fitted. Go up a size. Try to get little to no breaks.)
•round or pointed toed shoes (square toed shoes make you seem shorter)
•hats, glasses, necklaces, bow ties, skinny ties (any accessories should be kept to the upper half of their body to draw the eye up and make them seem taller)
•binders (best binder brands I know of are Underworks, and G2cb)
•shoelifts (amazon has really good cheap ones)
• shop online for smaller men’s clothes (rue21, Zara, American Eagle, Express Men, Asos, H&M)

10

an incomplete list of LGBT+ characters in (fictional) period pieces [insp]

* much more prominent/explicit in the original book on which the film is based

Tips for young trans boys going on HRT [From two dudes already going through it]

Ok so since not everyone is actually fortunate enough to go through an actual Gender Service, I’m going to write some Will and Probably Won’t things that come with going on T. For ref, I’ve been on T a year and my bf has been on for two. Let’s start;

Won’t:

You’ll wake up one day and sound like Morgan Freeman. 

Will:

Going on T will deepen your voice. 

For some people it may happen quite suddenly, for others gradually. Most likely you’ll sound like you have a bad cold for a while and then it’ll even out and be different. If you like to sing, be aware of voice cracks and suddenly being unable to sing as high as you used to. Some guys get lucky and still retain singing prowess, but be aware there’s a high chance you won’t. 

Each person’s vocal change is different. My voice cracked literally after the first injection, whilst my bf had to wait a while for changes. Don’t be worried if it appears your voice isn’t changing and be aware it may not go incredibly deep. It will probably be more noticeable to others than you and eventually it’ll feel like your normal voice. Your pets will recognise your voice, they will always come to know you. 

Won’t:

Face shape will change drastically to become more masculine.

Will:

After a while on T, you may experience some change in face and body shape. 

A lot of trans boys I know seem to believe they’ll wake up one day and just have the perfect masc face. Everyone is different, I can’t stress this enough. You may experience a huge change in the face, you may experience almost nothing. My bf always had a very round ‘moon’ face and his cheeks have started to slim down but his facial shape is more or less the same. As for myself I’ve not noticed anything too considerable yet. 

The same goes for the broadening of the shoulders. If you’re very slender to begin with, you’re probably never going to be Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, but you might experience some changes. Again, don’t be disheartened, everyone is different. 

Won’t:

The fat in your breasts will break down from going on T and make you look a lot more flat, if your chest is small you may not even have to wear a binder.

Will:

If you have A cups, then maybe the breakdown that happens with T will mean you don’t have to bind. However, the breakdown from T alone is very small unless you’re on it for years. Also be aware that a lot of the fat in your body in general is going to start focusing on your stomach. It’ll become easier to gain muscle once on T, but if you don’t exercise, the weight you lose from other areas will go to your stomach. But also, muscle weighs more than fat, remember that. You may drop clothing sizes, which can be a pain if you’re already quite small and have trouble finding masc clothes to fit you, trust me I know. 

Also a note on binders: Do not use bandages or cheap binders. Do not. Binders can cause damage after prolonged use when you’re using a proper binder nevermind anything else. Bandages are made to contract and not let in moisture, they are not good for being tight around the chest! Cheap binders are also usually not breathable and will hurt more than they should! It could cost a lot, but forking out for a proper binder from places like lesloveboat is really going to be worth it. There is the sports bra method if you can’t get a binder because you’re not Out yet and couldn’t justify getting a binder to your parents etc but even then it’s not as safe as a proper binder.

Any binder shouldn’t be worn for longer than recommended, and will most likely rub especially when the T starts to make you sweat more. There’s also going to be an increase in acne on the chest around where the binder fits. If your chest ever really starts to hurt, find somewhere to take the binder off. I don’t care where you are, if you’re getting huge chest pains, take the damn thing off. If you damage yourself the chance of being able to get surgery reduces drastically, not to mention a whole lot of health problems you don’t want to deal with. It’s harsh, but it’s a lot better for you. Get a binder in the next size up and try again.

Won’t:

My periods will stop immediately and I’ll never have them again.

Will:

Eventually your periods will stop, though you may spot occasionally whilst you still have the necessary organs.

Though everyone is different, don’t be disheartened if you still have a period or two after starting T, you’ll stop eventually. You could also go a while without a period and then spot before stopping again. If the spotting continues for a while, or if you start to experience severe cramping, go and see a doctor

Won’t:

I’m going to get angry and aggressive a lot when on T!

Will:

Your emotions will be doing a whole lot of different things. Your may get angry, and you may also find your sex drive increases. You might also get upset more often or at things that never upset you before, or aren’t necessarily sad. I cried listening to that Chick Chick song, it’s ridiculous. It won’t last forever, be patient with yourself, there’s nothing wrong with you it’s basically just puberty (again).

Last things - 

Hair growth all depends on the person, the face being the last place that will probably grow hair and even then you’ll probably only have a tiny fluff for a long time, unless you’re lucky. My bf is experiencing hair in places now that I started growing extremely quickly right away. It could be to do with my having dark hair and him being a redhead tbh. But you will grow hair, all over. All over. Be prepared for that. You will get hair in places you never had much if any hair before. I have hair on my chest now. Not a whole lot but it’s there. The stomach is another hotspot for hair growth on T.

You will get acne, you will start to stink, sweat more and you may get growing pains. Look up Male Puberty, seriously, it’ll give you a good idea of some of the stuff that will start happening to you. Until your hormones calm down, your acne will not ultimately improve even with skincare. If you’re under 21, you might grow a little and the pains will be considerable. I gained like maybe an inch so I’m still short af but that’s something.

Your clit will start to get bigger. I know talking about the female genitalia we have is a big dysphoria bomb for a lot of us, but you need to read this. Your clit will get bigger, maybe considerably, maybe so much that the lips won’t hide it any more (if they ever did). It will rub against your underwear and/or your packer. For me it’s just mildly irritating, though for my bf it actually hurts (stings) him. It will be really sensitive either way. Be aware of that. 

Some people you don’t see every day or aren’t very close to may not recognise you when considerable changes occur. Use this to your advantage! Reintroduce yourself! 

If you self-inject, be prepared to mess up. There will be pain, swelling and bruising. If you have a nurse to inject you (like we do) there’s a change that they too might occasionally catch a nerve and you may bruise. Do not inject directly into a vein.

It’s perfectly fine to cry because of growing pains, pain from rubbing etc. You can be a man and still cry and complain but at least be aware of what to expect. 

Most changes will be so gradual that you’ll never look in the mirror and see a stranger, it’ll be like this was always the way you were.

If you do however, start to become really distressed by the changes or start to see nothing but a stranger in the mirror, please reconsider whether HRT is the right thing for you. The last thing you want is to be stuck with changes that are actually distressing you. It’s ok if you thought you wanted/needed this but then realised you didn’t/don’t. 

Last (gosh this was long). Every guy is different. Some changes come fast, some don’t. Some may be huge changes and some only small. Don’t compare yourself to other trans guys especially your own friends/loved ones. Every guy is different, be proud of your changes as they come and don’t let anyone bring you down just because those changes aren’t ~*significant*~  to them.

BEHAVIOR THINGS TO PASS AS A GUY

-“shrug” your shoulders very slightly. eventually it’ll feel nature if you keep at it. it makes your shoulders look bigger. Put your elbows on chair arms to do it while sitting

-clench your jaw a little bit. it sounds really weird but it’ll make you look like you have a more masculine jaw line

-walk with your stance every so slightly wider than usual. it’ll make your lips slightly less pronounced and make your shoulders look squarer

-Don’t move out of the way for people gracefully. not saying don’t move out of the way at all, but let yourself brush shoulders sometimes. You can also just be more spacious about it. And yes, in a crowded hallway you probably shouldn’t maneuver your way through.

-Be comfortable! I shit you not, this can be magic for passing. Be relax, act confident, and lean back and be comfortable. People see it as dominance and we subconsciously see dominance and our mind trails to masculinity

-when you sit in the floor, sit with your ass on the floor. Indian style or with your legs out works. Don’t sit on your legs or in that weird W shape (that’s bad for you anyway)

anyone feel free to add any other weird behavior passing tips you’ve discovered!

5

[[This got much longer, much faster than I expected and if you want to skip it, there is a tl;dr at the end.]]

Just a quick little psa guys. Always start with a neutral in the background when you are working on a new drawing. Your eyes will thank you. 

The plain white background is crazy bad to stare at for extended periods of time, and can lead to some serious damage later on. It leads to a host of issues: worsening near-sightedness, eye strain, double vision, light sensitivity, not to mention the back problems that come from you leaning in closer to the screen because your eyes hurt.

I use these refs up here by eyedropping one of the shades closest to the colors of the piece I’m planning and filling it in the background.

For example:

this

versus this

It’s much more comfortable to look at the grey as opposed to the harsh white. Plus, even if you don’t notice while drawing, you’ll feel better working on it which will let the creative mojo flow better.

Also, you don’t have to use a grey tone, those are just my defaults, you can use deeper tones as well. For example, I’m working on a drawing now that I have a dark purple blue on the background. I’m using the purple because I’m working with grey tones on the suit that would be difficult to discern from a grey background.

Just keep the temporary background from being too saturated and your eyes will be much happier. The higher the saturation, the stronger the light is that is going into your eyeballs. That’s kind of why it hurts to look at those brightly colored websites that are used as bad examples of webdesign.

tl;dr: Save your eyes by not drawing on white backgrounds.

*Posts picture to Twitter* I wonder if Liam will like this one.

*Within a minute* Liam: MOVE I NEED TO LIKE THIS IMAGE IMMEDIATELY.

hoe tip

hickies man. there are the devils work. last week i got some good dick, and he gave me so many hickies that people literally though i was attacked. my bruises were all over my neck and chest from choking and regular bruising and they were huge. i am here to help y'all out with hiding your hickies

1. before you do anything else (same night even), ice them. stick a cold spoon in the freezer and then place them on the bruise until the spoon thaws. if your hickies are huge like mine, i used an ice pack and also filled a metal water bottle until it was cold for something a little more heavy duty. 

2. then, maybe a couple of days later, you can start treating the hickies with heat (warm baths etc.) but don’t do this too soon

3. this ones my special trick! take a coin or some kinda scrape-y tool, and run it over the bruise pretty lightly. do this maybe three times a day, and i guarantee you the hickies will look soooo much better. (This one works because a bruise is really just a collection of blood beneath the skin, so if you beret up the blood, it heals quicker). (i used this one on the huge one on my neck, and it actually went away faster then the one like an eight of the size on my chest that i didn’t use the trick on)

hoe on

8

There was an attempt

How To Gain Muscles

Yeah yeah there will be a million articles out there but this is the one which will point out the things others rarely do. 

1. Don’t stress -  You might find it hard to believe but your mental health contributes a damn lot to your physical health and body. Stay away from negative people or those who make you sad. Get out of that bad relationship. After years of ups and down, I’ve seen the difference it makes to your physical body. To give you the latest stat, I gained 11 pounds of muscle in 6 months after cutting off with someone negative which is pretty much the MAX a human body is capable of. I suggest you also take a 15-20 minute break each day during which you should just have some tea (or literally whatever else you like) and listen to calm music and not thing of anything negative.

2. Sleep - Your sleep is as important as your workout, if not more. You workout in the gym but you gain muscles in your bed when you sleep. I try to sleep for atleast 10 hours a night for atleast 5 nights a week. Don’t think much about the numbers, just know that if you gotta wake up early, go to bed early. If not then go to bed at your own pace and just sleep for as long as your body may want. If you don’t do this then simply kiss your muscle gain goodbye, it just wont happen no matter how much you workout at the gym.

3. Diet - As someone who goes to a Uni to study nutrition, I know some shit and I found out 2 ways to gain muscles via your diet. I wont give you any plans to stick to because I dont like those. I don’t want to live everyday calculating around how much I ate and stuff. I am not a professional bodybuilder, I dont want to go through all that everyday so what I did instead was - Calculate how much I actually eat on average per day, then adjust my workout according to what I eat. The normal way of doing this is that you workout and then take a surplus diet. I live alone and am too busy with work to alter my diet and I’m sure many others have the same problem so instead just take an average of how much you eat and adjust your workout amount accordingly. Workout less if you have to because of your diet - you’ll still gain more muscle this way than the other way around. The second thing I want you to do is, eat a bowl of porriage with every meal. I’ve tried many things and I think porriage is the fastest and best thing that works. I don’t take any protein shakes. Porriage is cheap and so is oats and bananas in which I throw in the porriage. That’s all I need with occasional chicken breasts every once a week or maybe once in 2, whenever I feel like going to the shop to buy it.

4. Skip Gym - Yes you heard that right. Pay close attention to how your body is feeling. If you’re still feeling the pain from the other day, don’t workout. Specially, don’t workout the part which hurts. I try to workout every body part 2 times a week. So if my arms are still hurting from the previous day’s workout, I either take an off or workout my legs the next day without putting any load on my arms. I wouldn’t do chest or back either since indirectly your arms are working as well while doing those. I would give priority to proper rest for my body parts over another workout always.

That’s it. That’s all I gotta say, don’t wanna make things much complicated. Just follow these tips and you will gain muscles. 

If you’re somone who dont have the time to go to the gym and still wanna gain muscles, here a thing for you:

Wait for a man that...

…will put in the time, heart, and effort to pursue you.

None of this whole “chasing around boys who don’t really like us and pine when they reject us” business.

Wait for God to set you up with one who will put in time to win your heart.

How can he do that though if you’re throwing it at him?

Be secure enough in yourself and your father that you don’t need to throw your heart around and give it away to any man who winks his eye at you.

Be a woman, secure in God, deadly to the devil, feminine in strength, purity, and tenderness, and give your man a chance to be a man.

Let the boys go who blow you off and expect you to let them walk all over you or just plain won’t put in effort to get to know you at all.

Let them go, and position yourself as a woman satisfied in herself & her life.

Give yourself to knowing God, give yourself to loving others, and your man will come alongside you.

You will never have to strive to make him like you, to make him talk to you.

He will be already a man in pursuit of your heart without your help.