man this was a great idea

anonymous asked:

Slight disagreement with the idea that Tony's life is worse than Wandas Tony while his childhood wasn't that great due to Howard's asshole self was ultimately better than most, he had a home with a mom who loved him and Jarvis, he had food and money and everything was well, his parents died which affected his but it wasn't that bad, ultimately his life became shit when he was kidnapped and went through hell, then all the iron man two crap happened leading into the avengers 1/2

2/2 and everything happening after that, Tony’s life became crap but I feel like it was not worse than Wandas Wanda watched her parents die due to bombs when she was 10, she and her brother than were stuck under a bed for days afraid that if they do much as sneezed the second bomb would go off and kill them. They then became orphaned and homeless in a war torn county where she grew up engaging in protest and hoping to help her county (note: the entirety of sokovia is anti America 2/3

3/3 and anti tony stark, they all blame tony for what happened so it’s not just Wanda and Pietro) she was then told that she was joining Shield in order to protect her country. Instead she unknowingly joined a Nazi organization and was put through experiments which were sure as hell torture in order to do this. We saw everything else I feel as if their life’s are at least equally traumatizing (if Wandas is not a bit more due to her young age)

Hey everything you’ve said is completely irrelevant because I did not say that Tony’s life is worse than Wanda’s. I said she would have jumped back out of his head if she’d really delved into his traumas (which she’s perfectly capable of doing) and also she chose to go through those experiments. I’m sure they were torture, that they were painful, but she chose that.

Everything great about Tony Stark in Spider-Man Homecoming:

  • He was totally cool with Peter making a vlog and went along with it
  • He made an inappropriate flirtatious comment about Aunt May and immediately apologized for it
  • The way he acted for that entire scene.
  • Like… he knew Peter was really looking up to him and he had no idea how to handle that and he tried his best to play it cool.
  • “Bye.“
  • He saved Peter’s life from THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD!!
  • He installed Peter’s suit with anything that would keep him safe, including a parachute and a goddamn heater because what if my son goes out and it’s cold and he forgot a sweater?
  • He called the FBI about the weapons and told Peter to stay away from it because he didn’t want Peter to get in any more danger
  • He called Peter to tell him he was proud of Peter’s work at Washington DC and that he had underestimated him.
  • He went into ‘Suspicious Dad‘ mode the instant he heard the siren on the boat.
  • “Hey, Spider-Man. How’s band practice?”
  • Translation: “you are so grounded.“
  • He told Peter off and then went ‘Great, now I sound like my dad.‘ Oh god, he’s still haunted by how badly his father raised and he doesn’t want to have the same impact on Peter. This man needs a hug like, now.
  • “If you’re nothing without this suit, than you shouldn’t have it.“
  • He made an ENTIRE NEW SUIT for him and was totally ready to unveil Spider-Man as a new Avenger to the world because he is just so proud of his Spider son.
  • He doesn’t object when Peter says no and decides to go back to just being a friendly neighbor hood superhero for the time being.
  • HE’S BACK TOGETHER WITH PEPPER!!
  • He gave Peter his suit back.
8

Happy 100th Birthday John Fitzgerald Kennedy (May 29, 1917 – November 22, 1963)

“There’ll be great presidents again … but there will never be another Camelot.” - Jackie Kennedy 

  • Me: *posts anything to do with Cult Ending*
  • Some guy with a megaphone, directly next to my ear: Actually the Cult Ending is CONFIRMED non-canon and scrapped content, despite there being no evidence to prove this!!! The game is 100% wholesome and comedy and nothing dark at all!!! Why even post about something NON-CANON???
  • My gay, horror loving ass: Let me have my own fun, damn it.

I imagine before he got to know them, Kravitz absolutely HATED the IPRE crew. Like, the dude is competent, but the guys have a habit of completely humiliating anybody they end up fighting.

Let’s rewind a few years. Kravitz is doing his thing. Kicking ass, reaping souls and killing liches. Heads back to his office in the Astral Plane (because i refuse to believe that the afterlife is anything but a stupidly complicated bureaucracy) and checks in on his current list of bounties.

There’s the usual list of necromancers, immortals, escapees from the stockade and users of profane rituals, you know the types, the guys who have the twelve syllable names and such. But there are seven new people he needs to hunt down. And all of them have died at least eight times. You hear that? It’s the sound of Kravitz getting paid.

So who does he go after first?

Merle Highchurch, fifty-seven deaths. God. So much reward. Kravitz hunts anybody by the name of Highchurch down, but nobody has any clues as to where the guy is. Kravitz heads back to the office and checks out all the information he has on the guy. And surprise surprise, he’s a follower of the god of bloody travelers. Krav could hunt down this guy for the better part of a decade, and he’d only find the guy by luck. Great. Wonderful. Fine. He has six other bounties to check out.

Magnus Burnsides, nineteen deaths. Okay, so Magnus is MUCH easier to find than Merle, if only because Magnus announces his name to anybody who asks. Lives in somewhere called Raven’s Roost. He’d been there a few times, not a bad place. So Kravitz heads over there. And great, the entire bloody town is on FIRE and the populace is DEAD. As a reaper, he’s legally required to take care of wandering souls he finds wandering around. So he has to take a good month or so wrangling a good 600 people into the afterlife. Much to his surprise, Magnus has a wife who recently died. The woman stares at him for a moment before laughing, because apparently Magnus can get lost in a goddamn hallway and it would take a goddamn miracle for Kravitz to track him down. Goddamn it.

Taako Taaco, eight deaths. Taako is, unlike the others, a complete goddamn ghost. The most he can gather is that the guy is a wizard and an elf and that is generally it. It is by pure luck he’s assigned to the Glamour Springs case, and hears about Taako Sizzles It Up. Okay, THAT is easier to track he thinks. Except Taako apparently did a show in literally EVERY TOWN in the world at some point and is charismatic enough that nobody is willing to tell him much of anything. And then, like both Magnus and Merle, he has apparently vanished into the mist and NOBODY KNOWS WHERE HE IS GODDAMN IT.

Lup Taaco, twelve deaths. Kravitz is not surprised that Lup is related to Taako because she is even harder to find than Taako. There is literally nothing except the fact that she died in some cave near Neverwinter. There are literally no souls in that cave, and he checked. Twice. So where the hell is she? Who the hell knows. Who even cares.

Davenport, nine deaths. Is somehow just as elusive as anyone else. Because these people hate Kravitz. Kravitz checks everywhere. A few merchants in Neverwinter remember having met a guy named Davenport a few years back, and he seemed pretty cool, and he bought a can of soup once. Great. THANK YOU MERCHANT MAN. SO VERY HELPFUL.

Barry J Bluejeans, twelve deaths. Barry fucking Bluejeans. BARRY GODDAMN JAY GODDAMN BLUEJEANS. Kravitz has no end of words for this asshole. Unlike the others, Kravitz has met this guy. He has no idea what goddamn class Barry is other than a magic-user because WHAT SPELLS DOESN’T THIS GUY KNOW GODDAMN IT. Oh oh oh and get this, he’s fueled by the power of love. Love. As if a normal lich isn’t annoying enough to deal with, but this guy apparently refuses to leave without his wife. A wife who, COINCIDENTALLY, has the name of LUP. And Kravitz knows. He goddamn knows, in the depths of his heart, that this Lup is the exact same one as Lup Taaco. BECAUSE THE UNIVERSE HATES HIM.

Lucretia, ten deaths. Somehow even worse than Taako, Davenport and Lup combined. Because he has nothing on her. At all. No class, no god, no spell-list, no ANYTHING. Alright. Fine. Detective Kravitz time. Her name is spoken very very rarely, and she is apparently the leader of some mysterious organization called a Bureau? Fine. Where is this Bureau. What’s that? It’s hidden? You can only summon a way there if you’re a member? Of course. Obviously. Wonderful. Why not. Cool. Great.

So now. Let’s advance to the start of the story. Kravitz is called out to investigate Phandalin. He arrives, and is immediately hit by a wave of pure fire. When he wakes up? He sees four figures in the distance. And three of them are Magnus. And Merle. And Taako. And Kravitz is about to fight them, when a goddamn orb appears from the sky and carries them to a goDDAMN SKY BASE WHAT THE HELL I HATE THESE PEOPLE

And then he finally meets these people by complete chance in the lab of Lucas Miller. And he is so happy. Because for the first time in six years, he has THREE OF THESE JACKASSES in front of him. There is no possible way they can escape this.

Guess what happens next.

So now, finally, let’s advance to post-Story & Song. And he has all seven of these assholes in front of him. Defenseless. He could reap their asses right now. But he can’t. Because the Raven Queen has declared they’ve earned a pardon.

A few hours after the celebration party, Kravitz warps back to his office and screams for a solid hour.

EDIT: Somebody mentioned the whole Barry dies like twenty times over the course of a decade so now I have to establish that at least five of those were Barry staring Kravitz dead in the face, killing himself instantly and rising out of his body as a lich. Just so that Kravitz can know EXACTLY how petty Barry Bluejeans will be.

anonymous asked:

what are your general thoughts on wyoming?

Before working at the greenhouse in FoCo, I didn’t understand people’s obsession with tomatoes.  I still don’t understand WHY people are like this, the plants are fussy and unpleasant to work with and tomatoes taste like concentrated mouth sores to me, but as least now I have some inkling of the depths of madness edible nightshades can drive people to*. I watched a pair of octogenarian women get in a fistfight over the last Amish Paste we had that week, another man break down in tears over the fact we were out of Mortgage Lifters until next Teusday, and my own manager wax poetic about recent developments in hybridization.

*I could understand if it was Potatoes, THOSE are amazing

The greenhouse I worked at grew ours in-house, to the tune of four long arched green houses and 40 different breeds of tomato, started in February and staggered to last most of the season. We sold something to the tune of ten thousand mature plants per season, and four times that in starters, the manager explained with pride, the two anatolian-ridgeback mixes drooling happily on my leg during employee orientation.

“Who buys That Many tomatoes?” I asked, naieve. 

My manager’s dark laughter should have been a warning.

During one of the hailstorms in late May, the greenhouse was, briefly, blessedly deserted, if deafeningly loud as the sky hurled balls of ice onto the cheap plastic roof.  My manager had left early that afternoon and so I was left to manage that fifth of the business largely unattended.   I was watering the Fucking Tomatoes when two of the roundest miniature Australian shepherds I’ve ever seen appeared at my feet, wheezing happily.  Looking up, I found a pair of equally gleeful humans behind them, sun-burnt and wearing matching Jimmy Buffet shirts.

WE’D LIKE SOME TOMATOES.” The man bellowed over the roar of hail.

“WE HAVE MANY TOMATOES.” I shouted back, gesturing at the wall of tomatoes behind me.

GREAT!” howled the woman. “CAN YOU TELL US ABOUT THEM? WE’VE NEVER DONE TOMATOES BEFORE.

Since I was alone, I spent the next forty-five minutes screaming the attributes of all forty breeds of tomato at them, unable to hear myself speak over the rain, hail and wind, and already dissociating from the noise. I have no idea what I actually said to these people. I might have claimed they were bred on the moon. We got to the end, my throat raw, and fat little Aussies drooling on my shoes.

WHAT DO YOU WANT MARIE?” The man asked.

I DON’T KNOW, THEY ALL SOUND EXCELLENT.” Marie considered. “LETS GET THEM ALL HOWARD.

what.

GOOD IDEA.  WE’LL TAKE FIVE OF EACH.” said Howard.

WHAT.

That’s 200 plants and at $10 a pop, $2000 dollars worth of tomatoes. Why.  I get the extra-large cart out and start loading the tomatoes on. How. I wonder as It takes me three lumber carts to get them all up to the register to scan them.

WE’RE FROM CASPER.” Howard said, like that would explain anything. “THE BIG BLUE HOUSE, YOU CAN SEE IT FROM 25.

Having driven through that part of Wyoming several times to and from Grand Teton, I actually knew about the house in question. “OH YES. WE USE THAT HOUSE TO KNOW WE’RE HALFWAY TO TETON AND TO GET LUNCH.”

YOU SHOULD STOP BY NEXT TIME YOU’RE AROUND.” said Marie.

“OKAY.” I said, for some reason, and helped them out to the parking lot where I discoved they’d apparently driven down in an actual Short Bus, modified to be a sort of camping vehicle, with seatbelts and custom dog-beds for the Fat Aussies, apparently named “Florence” and “Mashmallow”.  I waved cheerfully to them, ears ringing and white lights flashing in my eyes from the continuous noise and feeling like I’d stepped out of my correct timeline.  I found one of the other managers and told them I’d just made them $2k, had a migraine and was going home.


A month and a half later, the seasonal job had ended and I was driving to Washington to see a friend and I happened to be passing through Casper.  In need of a break and eternally curious, I decided to try to find the Big Blue House and see if any of the tomatoes had survived.  It took me a bit to find the correct frontage road but as I was driving by the front yard-

[REDACTED] HOW ARE YOU?” bellowed Marie. somehow spotting and recognizing me. “I’M SO GLAD YOU CAME, COME SEE THEM!

Apparently they just talk like that all the time, but I had a lovely half hour in which Marie and Howard took me on a lovely tour of their experimental self-sustaining farm with the trout pond and chickens and the 200-still-alive-and-apparently-thriving tomato plants.  Given that tomatoes are happiest when hydrated But suffering, Casper turned out to be a good choice.  They’d also gotten some 30 varieties of corn, 15 types of potatoes and 12 types of carrots and Howard was looking into Beans and Squash for next year.

IT WAS VERY NICE OF YOU TO COME OUT.” said Howard.  “HERE, HAVE SOME HAM.

I thanked them, took my three pounds of sustainably-farmed Loud People Ham, and excused myself as I still had to get to Bozeman by that evening and they waved me goodbye from the driveway.

We’re still facebook friends.


(if you enjoy hearing about strange people I meet, please consider supporting my Tip Jar so I can buy groceries)

10

Fallout New Vegas, 2010. Obsidian Entertainment.

Cute past!Ardyn with his black chocobo *_*
I want to know more about Ardyn’s past life before he became evil guy…

Drarry Fic Rec Masterlist

I’ve been meaning to put this together properly for some time now, so finally, here is a list of my top Drarry fics.
Definitely read through all the other works of these amazing writers. These are just my personal favourites. 

Enjoy! Hahahahah good luck ever doing anything else ever again.

First and foremost comes Saras_Girl like, I CAN’T EVEN.
So, my top favourites of theirs:

Turn (E)
The Foundations series GUHHH:
Part 1: Reparations (E)
Part 2: Foundations (E)
Helix (E)
Catfished (T)
It Takes a Village (M)
Salt on the Western Wind (M)
All Life is Yours to Miss (M)

(I don’t need to say anymore to pitch these. They are your bread and butter. READ THEM.)

Tales From the Special Branch by femmequixotic (E)
When Gawain Robards asks him to form Special Branch seven-four-alpha, Harry Potter knows they’ll have to work outside the confines of the law–even though they are the law.

(Aurors!Harry and Draco, forbidden fruit, case fic, lots of excellent smut, incredibly complex and well-written plot. I can’t even with this fic it’s so freaking good. Most recent in the series has just started posting but each individual fic is brilliant stand-alone. MASTERFUL. And so satisfyingly long.
They have so many great fics, go read them allllll!)

Temptation on the Warfront by alizarincrimson (E)
Draco Malfoy is forced into hiding with the Golden Trio and dragged into their search for horcruxes. What ensues is a journey of redemption, unexpected friendships and an unwanted, turbulent romance with Harry Potter. Warnings for swearing, sexual content, and dark themes.

(7th year AU. Really well developed and reworked to include Draco. One of my drarry firsts and an all-time love.)

Running on Air by eleventy7 (T)
Draco Malfoy has been missing for three years. Harry is assigned the cold case and finds himself slowly falling in love with the memories he collects.

(So, I’m not great at reading T-rated fics… I actually read this one by accident. I am so glad I did. Beautiful fic. Melancholy and lovely and just yes.)

Against All Odds by momatu (E)
Beauxbatons is hosting the first ever Quidditch Summer School for children from all over Europe, and Harry has promised to enroll Teddy as his birthday present. Meanwhile, Draco is stuck in his office, putting together the first ever Quidditch Summer School for children from all over Europe during, when he should be enjoying summer holidays.

(Momatu really does their research and creates a vivid world with great development between Harry and Draco. Highly recommend trawling through their work and reading it all. Massive thanks to @siriusly-not-over-remus​ for reccing this to me!)

One Touch by Fleetofshippyships (M)
An unexpected incident late one night sets off a series of events that could save one young man in desperate need of help, even if doing so may destroy the other.Harry commits an act of great violence, but doesn’t remember why. Malfoy urges him to run, and takes the blame instead. The most obvious explanation makes no sense, and it only gets more complicated from there.What follows is their struggle to trust and open up to one another while dealing with dangerous and invasive magic; when stepping wrong and losing control, even if only for a few moments, could have severe consequences for them both. 

(8th year AU. Fantastic concept for plot and really well developed idea. Another one to absolutely check out a load of their work. I also highly recommend by them:

Restraint (E)
Someone casts the Imperius curse on Draco Malfoy, and whatever the instructions may be, Harry finds himself an unwilling target. The encounter leaves him torn between pleasure and revulsion. As they fight in the aftermath, a tense game begins. Harry fights to convince Malfoy, and himself, that he was not affected by that initial encounter, or any of those following it. Faced with a series of escalating encounters, Harry must come to terms with desiring things he never thought he could, things he wishes he didn’t respond to. They each use signs of arousal as weapons against each other in a mad struggle to finally shame the other into backing down for good. But it’s only after the game is over that Harry starts to understand.

(8th year AU. Great angst and enemies to lovers progression. Drinking. Games. A hella lot of rough sex. This is a smuuuuut fic. I also helped beta this fic because it was so good and I couldn’t wait for updates.)

Balance, Imperfect by bixgirl1 (E)
When Harry sustains an injury in the line of work, he no longer knows how to navigate the life he loved, and finds help and solace from the most unexpected source.

(Auror!Harry, Physiotherapist!Draco.
I totally got @sirussly​ to read this and she loved it, closet hardcore Drarry shipper right there.
I LOVE @bixgirl1 I cannot explain. All the stuff by them is just fantastic. Especially:

The Shape of the World (E)
and:
In Evidence of Magical Theory (E)

They are also in the middle of a collab with the wonderful @l0vegl0wsinthedark on a super cute and super smutty Virgin!Draco series on here (search either of their blogs under the ‘virgin draco’ tag.)

Speaking of! l0vegl0wsinthedark has a whole load of great fics (all the good smut). Absolutely worth working your way through it all!)

Draco Sodding Malfoy by Shewhxmustnxtbenamed (M)
Harry finds Draco outside a pub and takes him back to his place, only to find out that Draco is in an abusive relationship. Harry invites Draco to stay until he can get back on his feet. They go to Draco’s ex-boyfriends house, and come back with more than they bargained for.

(So. Cute. Domestic bfs. Also very worth checking out @shewhomustnotbenamed​ and their drarry videos hallooooooo) 

Azoth by zeitgeistic (E)
Now that Harry is back at Hogwarts with Hermione for eighth year, he realises that something’s missing from his life, and it either has to do with Ron, his boggart, Snape, or Malfoy. Furthermore, what, exactly, does it mean when one’s life is defined by the desire to simultaneously impress and annoy a portrait? Harry has no idea; he’s too busy trying not to be in love with Malfoy to care.

(Hogwarts Apprentices!Drarry. Animagus magic. SO GOOD GUH. I really love the idea for Harry’s animagus and the progress is so excellent.) 

Any Instrument by dicta_contrion (E)
Draco Malfoy wouldn’t go back to England for anything less than an exceptional case. Being asked to figure out why Harry Potter can’t control his magic might be exceptional enough to qualify.

(MindHealer!Draco. THE BIG LEAGUES SO GOOD YES. Excuse me while I go read this again. OKAY BUT LOADS OF THEIR OTHER STUFF TOO ESPECIALLY:

The Vanishing Department (E)
The things we lose have a way of coming back to us in the end, even if that involves a lot more form-filling, bickering, covert glancing, miscommunication, and flying furniture than we might expect.

(Brilliant characterisation of Draco and really interesting idea. YES.)

House Proud by astolat (E)
His house liked Draco Malfoy more than him.

(OKAY, I LOVE THIS. WIZARD HOUSES ARE THE SHIT AND THIS IS SO CLEVER YES. REALLY FREAKING GOOD BANTER BETWEEN HARRY AND DRACO. Also other stuff by them like:

NEWTS

“I’m twenty-eight!” Harry said. “I’ve been an Auror for ten years! You want me to go back to Hogwarts now?“

(Harry has to go back to Hogwarts before he can be promoted, Professor!Draco. Yisssssss.)

- Timeshare (BONDING FIC YES)

Eclipse by Mijan (T)
Draco swore his revenge on Harry for Lucius’s imprisonment, and Harry all but laughed at him. But Draco is planning more than schoolyard pranks this time. The old rivalry turns deadly when Draco abducts Harry for Voldemort. It’s the perfect plan, guaranteeing revenge, power, and prestige, all in one blow. But when Draco’s world turns upside down, the fight to save himself and Harry begins, and the battle will take them both through hell and back. If they come back.

(6th year AU. Pre-HBP. Another accidental T read with 0 regrets. I LOVED this, SO MUCH.)

A Year In Training by Omi_Ohmy (M)
Harry is finally living his dream and training as an Auror, but nothing seems to be going right: he’s just so angry all the time. And Draco Malfoy’s presence on the programme really isn’t helping with that, either.

(Aurors!Drarry: Harry’s pissed off Draco is better than him. I’m sure you can see where this goes…)

Eternally Consistent by kitsunealyc (E)
Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter assumed they would never be anything but civil enemies, until Potter lands on Malfoy’s doorstep, bleeding, covered in curses, and acting very strangely indeed.

(Unspeakables!Harry&Draco: Nice swift enemies to lovers progression, goooood!)

Tea and No Sympathy by who_la_hoop (E)
It’s Potter’s fault, of course, that Draco finds himself trapped in the same twenty-four-hour period, repeating itself over and over again. It’s been nearly a year since the unpleasant business at Hogwarts, and Draco’s getting on with his life quite nicely, thank you, until Harry sodding Potter steps in and ruins it all, just like always. At first, though, the time loop seems liberating. For the first time in his life, he can do anything, say anything, be anything, without consequence. But the more Draco repeats the day, the more he realises the uncomfortable truth: he’s falling head over heels for the speccy git. And suddenly, the time loop feels like a trap. For how can he ever get Harry to love him back when time is, quite literally, against him?

(Really nice development of Draco, and fun plot! Definitely worth going through their other works too, some really great stuff!)

Strangeness and Charm by FeelsForBreakfast (E)
One November night during his eighth year at Hogwarts, Draco ends up in the forbidden forest. That’s how it starts.
or: If two boys fall in love in a magical forest, does it still make a sound?

(8th year AU. Dreamlike and sweet. Check out their other works too. I especially recommend ‘Like Holly or Blood’ (M) and 'Open for Repairs’ (M).)

Strange Bedfellows by hurt_mod and ravenclawsquill (E)
When Harry encounters a frail and fidgety Draco Malfoy at the Ministry, he just knows something is wrong and he’s determined to get to the bottom of it.
A story about Deadly Nightshade, crippling insomnia, excellent wine … and finding what you need in the strangest of circumstances.


(Addict!Draco. All the good angsttttt.)

Boom Clap (The Sound of my Heart) by femmequixotic and noeon (E)
Post-war Hogwarts has been energized by its new teaching fellows program. Where once bitter enmity divided the wizarding community, Malfoy and Potter chummily patrol hallways together whilst Granger and Zabini seek lost parts of the castle at McGonagall’s behest and Chang supervises Quidditch when not lecturing in Charms. It’s a veritable wizarding utopia and life is predictable for the first time in years. Which is, of course, when everything blows apart as the result of a drunken dare and Malfoy’s life is ruined beyond his capacity to repair it. Ever. In a million years.

(TeachingFellows!Harry&Draco: Drinking games wohooooo!) 

Lift Your Open Hand by firethesound (M)
With Draco Malfoy as his assigned partner for the next six weeks of Auror training, Harry had been prepared for things to go poorly. But getting themselves accidentally bonded to each other in the first twenty minutes of their very first assignment seemed going above and beyond, even for them.

(Aurors!Drarry. Who doesn’t love a good magical bonding fic?? Lots of great works, also recommend:

A Convenient Impracticality (E)
Somehow Harry ends up agreeing to a fake relationship with his ex-nemesis-turned-friendly-acquaintance-with-benefits, except for some reason it involves an awful lot of actual dating and, sadly, not much sex. Confused? Harry is too, but when has anything with Draco Malfoy ever been as straightforward as it seems?

(Aurors!Drarry, That good fake relationship trope. *thumbs up*)

The Light More Beautiful
 (E)
Thirteen years after Draco accepts Potter’s help escaping the horror of his sixth year, he returns to England where he makes the unfortunate discovery that Potter is still as obnoxious as ever. And worse, more than a decade overseas hasn’t been enough to dim Draco’s obsession with him.

(Sort of 6th year AU, then post-war Aurors!Drarry. Really interesting speciality for Draco and great development)

I will keep updating this as I remember more/find more great fics. 
If you have any requests for specific types of fic, hmu and I’ll see if I can help :)

Happy reading! <3

M x

atundratoadstool’s 10-point Rating Scale for How Dangerous Your Old Timey Fictional Science Is

1 - John Watson (Sherlock Holmes stories): You are 110% sane, nice, and not doing anything awful. You might even be reining in the awfulness of your douchey roommate now and again; maybe he’ll chill out now that he’s off the coke.

2 - Jack Seward (Dracula): You sometimes sort of want to do some really unethical human experiments involving feeding live kittens to people, but then vampires happen and you drop that idea.

3 - Giacomo Rappaccini (“Rappaccini’s Daughter”): Hey. You know what’s a great idea? Making people poisonous… like plants! Now you can just make a poisonous-plant-daughter and not have to worry about her dating. Wait. No. That’s dumb. Your bad.

4 - Victor Frankenstein (Frankenstein): You dropped out of college your freshman year to build a 7’ ugly corpsebaby. Your intentions weren’t malevolent, but you were woefully unprepared for fatherhood and your complete lack of parental responsibility had some serious consequences.

5 - Griffin (The Invisible Man): You’re kind of a dick. Actually, you’re really a dick. An invisible dick. If you were only a competant invisible dick, you might be able to enact your plans for terroristic, murderous world domination. As it stands, however, your propensity for murder is limited by how hungry, cold, naked, and unable to afford rent you are.

6 - Henry Jekyll (The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde): You’re like the guy who is a great person most of the time but becomes an abusive psychopath when he’s had too many beers. This wouldn’t be so bad if you hadn’t made and continually imbibed the ultimate “too many beers” potion.

7 - Herbert West (Herbert West: Re-Animator): You think there was a noble motive in all this somewhere, but it seems to have gotten somewhat distorted over all the years of you and your boyfriend digging up corpses and letting them turn into rampaging crazy murder zombies.

8 - Sydney Atherton (The Beetle): You’re just a guy, trying to get a girl’s attention, making an unstoppable death gas to futher the murderous colonial mission of the British Empire in your spare time. Nobody seems to actually notice that you are a looming danger to all mankind because they’re too worried about suspicious foreigners.

9 - Dr. Moreau (The Island of Dr. Moreau): You cut up animals until they’re people and then make them participate in weird people-animal cultic indoctrination as you megalomaniacally reign over them like a God. Maybe if you could actually make some people-people friends, this wouldn’t have happened.

10 - Dr. Raymond (The Great God Pan): Orphans you raise belong to you, and it’s chill to use them as subjects for neurological experiments to break the veil between our world and that of the unspeakable gods of the deep.

If they make a movie with Tom Holland’s Spider-Man and Deadpool can we please have Wade trying to babysit for the Avengers and Peter being a Very Difficult Child, causing a ton of chaos and stuff
Because that’d be funny and way better than any other Spideypool when it involves those two
And I can definitely see it being a possibility

we need more universal musical theatre memes. i felt the need to propose some

•every time there’s a picture of nic rouleau just pretending he’s a really important member of the mormon church (ie: “this is a picture of Brigham Young, one of the og mormons”; or “meet Thomas Monson: the president of the mormon church”)

•never saying lin’s name. just replace it with He, Him, His, etc. lin is god. 

•any musical that closed is now required to be bleeped out (gr**t c*m*t, etc)

•every year on march 21st (the first day of spring) everyone forgets that any musical except spring awakening exists

•this isn’t new but yall have gotta keep up with the “this is not amelie” bootleg names. fantastic. 10/10

•whenever people are partying describe it like “they’re behaving like they’re at the ballet”

•whenever someone is asking how to pronounce something/is pronouncing it wrong just go “actually it’s pronounced barFAY”

•whenever something confusing is happening be like “welcome to the rock”

•sentences in the style of “elsa from frozen? no, she’s maureen from rent” to describe people

•pretending jeremy jordan is an actual dog

•photoshopping christian borle’s face onto everything because he’s been in literally every show

•saying “hey guys who’s down to write a(n) ___ musical with me” except the ___ is replaced by something that should NOT be made into a musical (ie: “hey guys whos down to write a “the old man and the sea” musical with me)

•ben platt is an alien. we have no idea where he came from. he just showed up on earth today and decided to bless us with his presence and voice. you are now a secret agent whose task is to figure out where he came from and if there are more of these blessed beings

please feel free to add more. we need these in the broadway fandom

“But you lost,” Eric says gently, afraid Jack’s about to realize he’s made a mistake.
“And you won,” Jack counters, just as gently, cupping Bitty’s face. “And you have no idea how proud I am. Six years ago you’d pass out if you got hit. Tonight you ran me into the boards twice!”
“Cause you were being an asshole, Sweetpea,” Eric defends, fighting the warmth rising in his cheeks.
“And it was great, but you know who helped you through that? I did,”
Jack grins. “Checked you so many times you forgot you hated me. So, it’s a bit like I won too, you know? I got to see the man I love, the man I want to spend the rest of my life with, fearless.”
Oh. That’s.
Eric grabs a handful of Jack’s jersey and pulls him down into a kiss, heedless of the flashing lights and screaming spectators.
When they separate Jack’s expression is dazed.

“So you’ll marry me?” Jack cradles Eric’s sweaty face and peppers kisses across his cheek. “Please say yes. Make it official.”

(Excerpt from NHL!Bitty Part XII- ‘A Stanley Cup Wedding’) by @whoacanada
(The Rest of Whoacanada’s ABSOLUTELY MARVELOUS NHL!Bitty Series)

WELL THIS WAS FUN.

BACK TO WORK (that’s a joke. I’ll be in a daze for the next three hours like I usually am after finishing something like this)

(Thanks to everyone who kept me company while I streamed!!)
(and thanks so much to Whoacanada for bein’ a super person)

My other Check, Please! FanArt
My other NHL!Bitty related FanArt.  (and here)

5

Russel is the best dad

so I had this idea that as a kid Russel got Noodle a toy and thought it’d be super cute if she kept it all these years

It’s a bit rough so sorry, but I thought it was still cute so here ya go

BUT HEY I swear half the fandom is complaining Russel is underappreciated, this is my official appreciation to this great man. I feel Russel is the dad who respects that Noodles grown up, but is still sentimental and brings up stories of her as a kid???

anonymous asked:

prompt: alicia almost leaves bob after jacks overdose

[prompted by @eskildit, who now knows better than to send anons when she has great prompt idea <3  tw: overdose, homophobia]

The night before her son turns 13, Alicia Zimmermann pulls her husband aside and says, “Promise me you’ll let him choose for himself. If he wants to play hockey, if he wants to dance, if he wants to be a waiter, we’ll be okay with it.

Bob promises her, with all the devotion she’s come to expect, but not minutes later reminds her the NHL waits for no man, and Jack will need to start preparing for the future as soon as possible.

It was a sign of things to come, and she didn’t heed the warnings.


Jack is 14 when they diagnose him with an anxiety disorder Alicia’s never heard of. The specialist recommends reducing the level of stress in his life, maybe cutting back on unnecessary extracurriculars. He knows the family. He knows Bob. He’s being gentle.

They don’t change anything because hockey is life. Jack’s happy on the ice, unhappy off, so they take the medication instead. Just another step to Jack’s already offensively complicated routine.

“See?” Bob smiles when Jack is chosen to play for Rimouski Oceanic. “He’s going to be fine. Not like you and I didn’t need a little extra help in the beginning.”

He’s talking about Alicia’s drinking nearly twenty years prior. His own cocaine problem in the early 80s. But Jack’s not twenty and whole-hog into a career, he’s a teenager. 

She wants to protest on principle, but this isn’t her life. Bob knows this world better than she ever will, and if Jack still wants to play professionally (and he does), she needs to defer to her husband.

If this is what Jack wants, they’ll make it work.


Jack’s energetic, he’s happy, he has a friend he won’t be seen without, and Alicia watches how close Kent’s fingers are to Jack’s when they walk together. It’s not what she expected, but she’s happy he has someone. 

She’s not the only one that notices how close the boys are, and Bob turns to her in bed one night, brow furrowed, and says, “Kent Parson.”

“Mmm-hmm.”

“Are he and Jack…?”

She doesn’t say anything, just lifts a brow and gives him a considering look. 

Bob’s lips go white with how hard he’s pressing them together. “That’s not going to be easy, for either of them.”

“If it makes him happy,” she argues, and Bob hums in agreement. That should have been the end of it. But something happens, and she’s not there to stop it. 


The night before Jack overdoses and his career goes up in flames, the Zimmermann household is in ruins for an entirely different reason.

“Jesus Christ, Robert, I’m supposed to be a goddamn activist, if this gets out —”

“I don’t have a problem with gay people —”

“Don’t lie to me!” Alicia slams her hand on the table, nearly shaking with anger. “You told him to hide.”

“I told him to be discreet. Do you think I’m doing this for me? I’m getting calls day and night from teams wanting to know if the rumors are true. I was trying to be proactive! He can’t be–”

“What? Gay? That’s what you’re worried about? Maybe we can engrave that on the back of my GLAAD award: ‘For excellence in telling your child to hide their sexuality until they retire’. So everyone can know how fucking supportive we are. Does he think I feel the same way you do?”

“I don’t know, I don’t remember,”

My God, I can’t even look at you right now. You’re going to fix this. I don’t know how, but you’re going to make this right.”


Of course, then they find Jack unresponsive on the floor with a half empty bottle of medication and they don’t immediately know it was an accident. 

For about twelve hours, while Jack’s condition is still unstable, Alicia very seriously considers killing her husband. 

They’re red-eyed and exhausted in the waiting room when the doctor on call says they need to pray for a miracle. She stares at a stain on the carpet for a long moment, hands clasped, but she’s not praying. Bob makes some kind of sound, a hitching breath that isn’t quite crying, and she turns her head to watch him fidget. 

“Robert, look at me,” she says softly, deceptively kind, and when she has his attention, and with more hatred than she ever thought she could possibly feel, she says, “You did this. And I swear to you, if my son dies tonight, I’ll leave.”

She doesn’t wait for him to answer, doesn’t even wait to see the expression on his face. She collects her purse and stands, stretching her legs and heads to the vending machines.

She buys a Dr. Pepper and a bag of Tropical Skittles.



Jack lives. 

Alicia stays.

But she moves her GLAAD award to the trophy room. Settles it right beside Bob’s Hall of Fame plaque. 

Because she will never let him forget.

anonymous asked:

It seems Tyler Hoechlin is your favorite live-action Superman, but can you rank the actors from worst to best as you see it (of the current actors, I'm not sold on Hoechlin yet, but I think it has more to do with my dislike of his costume—particularly how the cape attaches—that it distracts me from the character, while Cavill seems to physically look perfect for the part and certainly is capable of the acting and charm, but the script he has to work with is lacking)?

Leaving out Kirk Alyn, John Haymes Newton and Gerard Christopher, since I’m not familiar with their performances:

7. Tom Welling

I feel kind of bad about this one. I grew up watching Smallville, y’know? And in terms of sheer man-hours devoted to the role, Welling has more of a claim to being Superman than anyone other than Bud Collyer. But he…wasn’t great, in retrospect. I suspect it was largely a matter of the material he was given; he did well whenever he actually had something to do, whether as dorky reporter Clark Kent intermittently throughout the final season, or various cases of amnesia/mind control/body-swapping/Red Kryptonite exposure. But outside maybe a sweet spot after he’d grown into the role and before he visibly started to get tired of it, and occasionally when getting to spar with (better) actors like Durance, Rosenbaum, and Glover, he had a weird stiffness when playing regular Clark Kent that for the most part didn’t translate into charm once he couldn’t bank on teen awkwardness anymore, and while that frankly made him a pretty honest depiction of the increasingly dicey version of the character he was written as, it didn’t make for a great take on Superman.

6. Henry Cavill

Cavill’s been more let down by the material than anything else - the unfortunate unifying factor of the bottom three here. When the movies let him be great, he really is great, whether promising Martha that he isn’t going anywhere even after learning the truth about Krypton or fighting for the stories he believes in against Perry White. For the most part though he just seems to be called on to look varying degrees of sad and solemn, asked to call on none of the charm he showed in, say, The Man From U.N.C.L.E. Granted his Superman has a lot to be down about, but there’s no range on display here; I don’t doubt he’s got a great take on the character in him, but for now it’s being kept under wraps.

5. Brandon Routh

Of all the reasons Superman Returns was such a damn shame, maybe the biggest was that it buried any chance of seeing the performance out of Brandon Routh that he so clearly had to offer. He’s a great dorky Clark, a charming Superman, and when the stars line up just right, he really manages to capture the idea of Superman as a melancholy figure - his take doesn’t just seem to be bearing the weight of the world in the philosophical abstract, but much more palpably feels an entire planet crying out for him, knowing he can never save them all but always trying anyway out of unconditional love, very much in line with Garth Ennis and John McCrea’s take on him in Hitman. Unfortunately all that takes up maybe 10-15 minutes of runtime, spending the rest of the movie stalking his ex with a neutral expression until he gets shived by Kevin Spacey and regurgitates Brando at his secret kid. Superman Returns was weird, ya’ll.

4. Dean Cain

I was honestly surprised with myself when I decided Cain won out as the best of the rest outside the big three - I thought for sure it’d be Routh. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that while Routh’s take is definitely closer to the version of Superman I had in my head, it’s compromised in a way the Superman of Lois & Clark never was: like the take or not, this is a perfect realization of the Superman the creators of the show clearly had in mind. His Clark’s funny, clever, warm, and vulnerable, and while it feels weird for him to be acting that way in the glasses these were the Byrne years, so as an expression of his ‘real’ self it’s pretty on-point. His Superman’s the weaker end, stilted even given it’s supposed to be him putting on a performance in-universe, but there’s such an unironic earnestness there that it typically slid back into charming.

3. George Reeves

I thought for awhile about 2 and 3, ultimately concluding that what was asked of George Reeves was a fair deal simpler. He didn’t much differentiate between Superman and Clark, and his booming radio announcer voice made clear we weren’t supposed to be measuring his performance in terms of whether or not he seemed like a real person. What he was called on to show though, and what he had out the wazoo, was raw charisma. When Jimmy asks him why he burst through a wall rather than using a door and Superman replies with a grin “Well, this seemed a little more spectacular,” you’re 100% willing to buy into that explanation, because yeah, it was spectacular, because Superman’s fantastic. And he could more than hold his own with the best of them when asked to work with more serious material, whether wandering through an amnesic fog in Panic In The Sky with only his instinctive decency to guide him, or here, in the final scene of The Dog Who Knew Superman, where Clark has to deal with a dog not only adoring him, but recognizing him in both identities:

2. Christopher Reeve

I gave Tom Welling his well-earned due earlier, but if you really want to talk about a guy with a solid claim to being Superman, Christopher Reeve didn’t just embed himself on the psyche of a generation, but is still held up today as the unequivocal standard by which the role is set. In all likelihood he’ll always be ‘the’ Superman, in the same way as Sean Connery will always be James Bond, and Bela Lugosi will always be Dracula. He shone like the sun in the costume, he was believably such a wimpy klutz out of it that no one would guess they were the same even when it was staring them in the face, and if anyone has any lingering suspicions that he just had the easy task of playing two extremely arch roles to the hilt, they might be forgetting this bit:

Was it perfect? I don’t know about that - if nothing else there were one or two awkward line readings, and the identity division is so sharp that it’s hard to tell when you’re getting a glimpse of the real guy underneath all the identities. But while I definitely question how much of a positive impact on Superman those movies themselves really had in the long run, Reeve’s performance on its own was an undeniable revelation, everything he did reverberating with such a sincere and powerful sense of decency and love for his fellow man that it not only brought Superman to the life, but frankly changed him forever for the better.

1. Tyler Hoechlin

I expected nothing out of this guy. Not that I by any means thought he’d be bad, but when I heard some dude from Teen Wolf was gonna appear on an episode or two of Supergirl, my reaction was about as intense as…well, what you’d expect upon hearing that some dude from Teen Wolf was showing up on Supergirl, even given who he was playing (granted I’ve never seen Teen Wolf and don’t actually especially know what Teen Wolf is, beyond that it’s based on that werewolf-playing-basketball 80s movie written by…wait, Jeph Loeb?!). Looked fine - and it became clear he actually really did look the part once behind-the-scenes pictures started to come out, rather than that godawful original promo picture - and I figured he’d belt out his best Reeve/Animated Series/Cartoon-on-the-side-of-a-cereal-box brand Generic Superman Performance to cheer Kara on before vanishing into the sunset forever outside of the opening credits. I was plenty interested in the potential long-term ramifications of Superman being allowed on TV again in any capacity for the first time since the 90s, given the influence that suggested Geoff Johns had as the new DC President and what that could mean in terms of other characters showing up down the line, but I wasn’t inclined to think of this as anything other than a stepping stone, only notable in its own right because it meant someone would be wearing the s-shield.

Then we actually saw him.

Where the hell has this guy been all these years? Was he grown in a goddamn laboratory for the part? How did the best Superman ever end up in a minor recurring guest spot on the CW Supergirl show?

It would be so, so easy to leap to the idea that he simply works as a jack-of-all-trades: he’s almost as charming as Reeve, just about as confident as Reeves, nearly as vulnerable as Cain. But that would be selling what he’s doing short - especially given that he probably hasn’t had the opportunity to stretch as far as he could in any of those directions, as his role so far has very much been as Supergirl’s backup dancer. What it comes down to is his general demeanor and how he incorporates those aspects into a whole that feels more fully-realized than any portrayal before him. His Superman and Kent are not only distinctive to the point that within the heightened reality the show occupies you can buy that people think of them as different people, but you can see threads from both of them connecting back to the real Clark you see around Kara. He’s open and warm and authentic in a way none of his predecessors quite were, and he’s able to turn on a dime into steely determination or outright fury while remaining recognizable. He’s above everyone’s heads and vaguely alien at times without ever seeming detached or less than entirely loving of the people around him, able to admit his fears and failings while staying strong and capable of changing for the better, utterly and palpably good without ever sliding into naivete or cartoonishness. In short he has range and nuance, and thanks to that along with the air of laid-back friendliness he brings with him, he more than anyone else to put on the suit feels like a real person. And somehow, that real person feels as much as anyone ever has like Superman. And that’s a hell of an achievement. So someone give him his own goddamn show already.

anonymous asked:

do you have any hcs about how andrew and neil come out and how does the public react and stuff??

Do I ever!!! Okay, so this is probably gonna be a shortened version of my idea that I have thought about way too often, way too much. But maybe I’ll get super out of hand with it. Who knows?

  • Kevin Day is getting bad publicity and the media is dragging him for something
  • (Maybe a drunken incident and his drinking problem? Idk exactly… This isn’t really the important part, it’s just set-up)
  • So, anyways, exy’s golden boy is getting a lot of negative media attention
  • Neil feels bad and wants to help shift some of the focus off of Kevin
  • Especially after Kevin told Wymack he was his father for Neil when Neil needed attention shifted off of him
  • Neil talks about this with Andrew, trying to figure out what he’s gonna do to distract from Kevin as much as possible
  • He’s not at all expecting Andrew to make suggestions or want to get involved
  • He’s just thinking out loud and maybe seeing if Andrew wants to shoot down any ideas as the worst that he should definitely not do
  • But Andrew likes being needed by the monsters and Kevin is his baby bird to look after
  • And he doesn’t really give a shit if people know he’s with Neil
  • Like his life isn’t their fucking business, but he can handle people knowing and it’s not like it’d be the worst thing the media’s broadcast about him
  • So, he pitches the idea as casually as if he were suggesting they order pizza later

Keep reading

“Man this old TV series of ours has been well-received by people of all ages and has become a classic over the past couple of decades. We should do a reboot to carry off the success of this classic as well as appeal to a new generation of children and nostalgic adults.”

“Yeah that’s a great idea!”

“Alright that means we have to make sure this reboot stays loyal to the original, people have very high expectations for this. The script, animation, characters…everything has to be up to par-”

“…or we could skimp out on our budget and barely half-ass this. The children watching this won’t care :))) and we can still make a decent amount of money regardless of the ratings we get!”

“Ok!”