man tagging is hard work :(

the grumps as patron saints
  • Dan: the patron saint of hair frizz, screwing around with instruments in your friend's basement, cascading laughter, platform shoes, success on your own terms, the crinking-rattling sound of a sack of skittles, city sunrises
  • Arin: the patron saint of black t-shirts, magical anime girls, eating things that weren't really meant for human consumption, the kind of favors you don't expect repaid, cupcakes
  • Ross: the patron saint of dinosaurs, shit-eating grins, being an asshole (mostly) out of love, backseat gaming, the first time you see snow, curiosity’s light heart and dark corners
  • Barry: the patron saint of genuine compliments, city lumberjack aesthetic, the meeting of enthusiasm and dedication, particle effects, people you’d never expect to swear until they do
  • Brian: the patron saint of licking things, elegantly graying hair, fathers who love their daughters, really terrible sex jokes, erotic friendfiction, steadfast friendship, those who are immune to kinkshaming
  • Suzy: the patron saint of shoes with spikes on them, light souls in dark times, crafts that sometimes involve dead animals, good hair days, the meeting of makeup and armor, fierce protectiveness
6
  • Happy Birthday, Mathew Baynton (18th November 1980)

“I decided it was my role to make the family laugh. Looking back, I think I was quite irritating. They’re probably glad that I’ve found an outlet now.” 

@taestory this is for u /)u(\

helpful list of what you could say as your first phrase of 2015 on new year’s

• I gotta pee

•HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY!

•shrek is love, shrek is life

•FOR NARNIA

•hot potatoes

•frick frack paddy wack

• …

•what

•hang on let me ask my mom if it’s okay

•*takes picture of clock* wow crazy

•I need to check tumblr

•AVENGERS ASSEMBLE

•*turns to cat* dance-off bro. You and me.

•MY WINGS… ARE A HURRICANNNNEEE

•*points accusingly* THIS ISNT OVER!

•what time is it

•*sings a Christmas song*

•#newyears

•well time to go to bed

•F*CK YEAH! AMERICA!

•*snorts*

•humans are fascinating

•you’re a wizard harry

•THOU HAVETH A GLORIOUS YEAR OF NEW

•i hope that bernard crumplecrack is having a good new years

•time is merely an invention to ease the human mind and allow better comprehension of cataloging events so technically years don’t even exist and it definitely isn’t a new one

•hot damn I want some jam

•what year is it? So many.

•better update my Facebook status

•does this mean we have to put the Christmas decorations away

•*throws confetti in the air* CONFETTI IT’S A PARADE!!

•I require sustenance

•BOW DOWN PEASANTS

•praise be to steeve

•I have loved this. This little gaaaame of ours

•aaaayyyyyyy

•2015 more like two thousand THRIFTeen if you know what I mean hahaha save money kids

•feel my legs I just shaved

•*makes a “I haven’t _____ since last year” joke*

•finally the year matches my IQ

•*old man voice* YOU CRAZY KIDS AND YOUR HOLIDAYS

•did I miss it

•pugs not drugs

•you’ll find last year in aisle four

•2015 is four numbers long, four minus one is three, triangles have three sides. Illuminati confirmed

                                          A Biomech’s Duty


LEDs flashed in time to key presses. Daniel sat at his desk, fingers not minding the viscera and pooled blood adorning most of his equipment. From the booth came recordings of the voice of Desert Bluffs, wave forms and data all pouring in. His processors accessed the main drive, letting information sync up. The result was editing and storage in real time - perfection harmonizing with efficacy. Daniel’s eyes glowed with focus as he typed away.

Multitasking came easy. He was able to watch Kevin as he worked, while at the same time keeping an eye on the interns walking about. No one dare meet his stare. Not out of fear or respect but lack of interest. He was a mere biomech, a cog in the machine and designed to do little else. No need to bother the computer.

Kevin spoke clear and cheerful. Each word was met with a flash of his sharp teeth. He held his microphone in one hand, the other tracing patterns in the gore painting his desk. Stacks of papers lay before him, keeping his statements on track with the ever present reminder to smile.

All proceeded as planned. Daniel fell into a rhythm as he did on many days. It was soon broken. A door opened without a known hand to turn the handle. His eyes glanced up from the screen. The interns had wandered elsewhere leaving only shadow. In the darkness he felt a familiar hum of electronics.

“Oh, hello there!”

Kevin turned in his chair, staring up at the stranger that had slipped into his booth. Red lasers focused on his face.

“Scanning. Identification complete. Subject ‘Kevin’.”

“Um. Yes my name is Kevin. Can I help you?”

Kevin rose, claws reaching for the stranger’s neck as per Desert Bluffs custom. The figure towered over him, blocking the door.

“You are coming with me.”

The ever present grin on Kevin’s lips faltered for a moment. He backed away, butting up against his desk. A coffee mug fell over, spilling its contents down onto the floor.

“W-what?”

Daniel froze, systems changing over to a far different mode. The metal exoskeleton, the red eyes - none of it Strex made. On the back of the stranger’s neck was a bar code and a symbol of circle, black with white rings making it appear as an eye. His data banks quickly found the warning given to him months ago about a Kakos Industries. The symbol matched.

Electricity crackled. Kevin let out a cry, seizuring before falling to the ground, body limp. The stranger held out an attachment from its metal hand. It still glowed with voltage.

“Get away from him!”

Daniel did not even think, he didn’t even lay out a plan. Only rose to his feet, eyes narrowing to a red glow. A target flashed on his display, cross hairs locking. Motors revved in preparation for a fight. He stared up, unafraid. The other mech had a thick exoskeleton and wore a leather collar with a harness to match. The only clothing it really had was a gold cod piece. Yeah. Definitely Kakos.

“Ha. Ha. Ha.”

A monotone laugh brought him back to reality, but no less outraged. Daniel stood many feet shorter than the interloping robot and much thinner not to mention the severe lack of weapons. That did not matter.

He caught a glance of Kevin stunned on the floor and sparked in rage, voice loud.

“Did you not hear me!?”

Daniel threw his full weight into the robot. It budged not even and inch. He grunted, feeling pain in his shoulder and cracked plating. A metal hand reached down, snatching him by the arm. The cretin laughed again.

“Obsolete Strex model.”

The grip was brutal yet he remained calm, scanning the intruder. He did not struggle, only glared, coolant fans whirring up. The robot had tough plating but still needed gaps for movement. Not to mention the exposed opticals.

In a calculated strike, Daniel jammed his fingers into the other’s eyes. The resulting jolts of electricity did not affect him and he pushed harder. Connections severed, broken glass cutting into wires. He pulled back after feeling a processor, aiming for another blow. Now blinded, the Kakos bot reeled back. Daniel was dropped. He knew the feeling, losing sight and having to redirect power to other sensors. He also knew it took a few seconds to calibrate the new incoming data.

“Get out of my station!”

Daniel leaped on the back of the robot. A human could be choked around the neck, but he gripped hard with another purpose. Pressure of his arms bit into the other’s shoulder, cracking joints. He knew it was not enough to do any kind of permanent damage yet he kept his vice like hold. Seams parted, the uniform spacing buckling under the force. From the crack came smoke. Daniel reached in, hand taking wires before tearing them out one after the other. The arm soon fell useless.

No more laughter from the intruder. Instead it poured out anger through revving motors. Daniel was thrown back, crushed between the robot and the wall. His body strained, skeleton bending under the stress. Oil dripped from the resulting cracks. In desperation he reached out, gripping the other’s wounded head and clutching hard. The thing jerked, ramming forward into the other wall, leaving Daniel to fall hard on the floor.

His systems churned, errors warning of structural damage and falling energy cells. Still he rose back to his feet, legs shaking.

The robot turned to face him, guns emerging from its chest, all pointed at Daniel. The biomech glared back, wiping oil from his lips. Bullets pierced his form but did nothing to stop his lunge. He threw himself at the other, hands clamping onto the weapons. The barrels were soon pinched shut by his strength. Shots still fired but with no were to go, the small explosions laid waste under the exoskeleton. Oil and smoke poured from every seam. The Kakos robot let out a garbled mumble before it fell over, eyes dark.

“Who’s obsolete now?”

Daniel stepped back, balance wavering. He had a few nasty holes in his chest from the shots that did land. Vital fluids pooled out onto the floor. His neck sparked, eyes having trouble focusing with the damage done to his system. The possessors were undamaged but his power cells were leaking and he could not move several of his joints properly. Warning after warning flashed up but he dismissed them all, falling to his knees.

“Kevin?”

Kevin lay still. His hair had spiked from the jolt, eyes closed. The contact area was burnt with raw skin under the clothing. Daniel lay a hand on his shoulder. Scans showed working body functions, heart beating strong. Only knocked out.

Daniel remained kneeling. His system went over each repair to be made and part to be replaced. At the same time he sent out a distress signal to Strex HQ. They’d be here soon. It was all over. His rage subsided, artificial muscles relaxing with no threat to defend against.

Strex security rushed in minutes later. They swarmed the booth, taking pictures of the broken Kakos robot before hauling it off. Kevin was lifted onto a stretcher and carried to an ambulance. Oil was cleaned up as well as metal bits and bullet shells. Daniel waited, eyes closed. Computers could be replaced, damaged keyboards and screens, all expendable. A damaged piece of equipment would always sit on the bottom of the list to humans. He remained there until they had all left. Pain in his chest not from the gun shots. It was a long walk back to his apartment.

A trail of oil behind him. Daniel limped up to the door. He had gotten used to repairing himself, replaced parts and keeping himself in good working condition. Strex would only take him to the shop for extensive upgrades or severe damage. Apparently this did not qualify. He calculated the time. Just enough to fix himself through the night then go back to work tomorrow. The radio station expected him there early. He hoped Kevin was recovering well.

Daniel turned the key, closing the door behind him. A frown on his face. All of this would be kept hidden. He wouldn’t even get a pat on the back. Not that it mattered to him but a little something for nearly scrapping himself on the station floor. Motors lacking oil, he slid down the door to the floor. Just a little breather before his long night of self repair. He shut down most of his systems, leaving only the vital ones online to save power. Eyes glowed duller now as he stared at his damaged form.

“Mew!”

Sensors picked up a faint sound. Daniel raised his head. A kitten trotted up with raised tail.

“Mrow!”

Soft fur rubbed against his arm. Purring began before the kitty even reached him. It nuzzled against his arm, climbing up onto his lap.

“Prrrr!”

Daniel smiled. “Hello, Hard Drive.”

The kitten mewed again at its name before climbing higher. Soon it hopped onto the biomech’s shoulder. Another rub this time against Daniel’s cheek.

“Aw. Did you miss me?”

“Reow!”

A loud meow but not from Hard Drive. Another kitty walked up, bight eyes happy as the nose below caught the sent of its loving owner.

“Emmy! Daddy missed you both.”

Daniel held out a hand, trying to keep it steady despite his aching joints. Emmy sniffed before licking it, moving to a rub. She soon rolled over, asking for tummy rubs with a loud purr.

Broken and forgotten, Daniel smiled. He may be just another bit of equipment for Strex, but to his cats he was the world. Living was made so much easier with them. He picked up Emmy, setting her next to Hard Drive on his chest. They snuggled into his hands, not caring if he wasn’t fully human. Through out the night the sound of tools and repair was joined by little mews.


                                                      The End


Imagined and written by Meveret

Hand drawn and computer colored by me

ideordinal  asked:

29, 40, 45?

29. became a fic rec Masterpost and overtook my entire night, really. 
40. which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series

Ohh… I would adore seeing Liura like that, I think, but I haven’t really given it that much thought yet. 
The DragonFic, though - that would be something. I had so often wished to see that instead of what Once Upon a Time had to offer, in its later seasons. I’m salty. 
Truth be told, I had a very particular original work at one time that I’d more or less abandoned… Although it condensed itself and turned into a play for a senior-year writing class assignment in college. I might be persuaded to take another run at it, actually. And I’m not sure I like plays. I love the sheer amount of dialogue, to be honest, but not that description and directing has to be done somewhat separately. That… could be fun… 
A very morally grey character, that was. I’m still rather fond of him. 


45. share the synopsis of a story you work on that you haven’t published yet

Oh dear. This is actually surprisingly difficult, since I’m in the process of ironing out details like how many years who was stuck where and squaring away with the idea that I’ll need to write some of Anakin’s apprenticeship. But, um… okay here goes: 

@deadcatwithaflamethrower this is the au I borrowed Terza for
and to everyone else who wanted to know more about it 
@punsbulletsandpointythings, @the-dragongirl, @myurbandream, @meggory84, @booksaresacredspew

A few tens before the Naboo debacle and the Battle of the Fates, Master Sifo-Dyas’ dreams intensify past bearing. Well on his way to Falling, Master Dooku has realised that he is in over his head, and attempts to derail Darth Sidious’s plans by whatever means necessary. The most immediate solution seems to be to prevent Sifo from traveling to Kamino. Master Dooku does his utmost, but at best his efforts hold for all of one ten-day. 

On the other hand, he does have some non-trivial impact on the course of events: That first night, the pressure on Sifo’s mind eases, and he has another, more immediate vision, involving Naboo and the possibilities a catastrophic loss will open in Dooku’s future. After all, Sifo concludes, the loss of his Padawan may sever Dooku’s last link to the Order that he can already see is failing. Master Sifo heads down to the Healers’ Halls and persuades Jale Terza to take a team of Healers with her to Naboo, and keep an eye out for a pair of Jedi who are about to really need her help. 

Thus, the team of Healers is on hand to save Qui-Gon’s life and bring him back to Coruscant. With Sifo gone, Dooku finds himself wandering down to the Healer Halls, watching his grand-Padawan sit in silent vigil at Qui-Gon’s bedside. Over the next few days, he gets to know Obi-Wan Kenobi and tangles in a few interesting arguments with him, over the state of the Order and the Republic as a whole. He’s impressed to find a fierce and fiery intelligence here that is receptive even to his blasphemous remarks. 

Realising that perhaps he still has a chance to put a stop to Sidious’ plans, and even if he fails, he has some support left in the Order now - Dooku leaves to find Sifo. (He is not heard from for another decade afterward.)

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and we keep loving anyway
we laugh and we cry 
and we make our mistakes