What would you say are the views of "Reddit liberals", broadly? could you summarise for someone who isn't really familiar with the place?
It’s kinda hard for me to describe, I suppose in the same way it might be hard to describe Tumblr’s social justice politics to someone who’d never used the website. Contrary to how they like to think of themselves, Reddit is a very insular, bubble-like community (the default setting on posts is literally so that you see the most popular comments at the top, structurally ensuring that majority opinion is both literally and figuratively at the top of conversations). That said, you’ve probably run into these people before, on here or elsewhere.
Reddit liberals share a lot of positions with regular social liberals. They’re concerned about economic inequality, climate change, campaign finance, and so on. On some issues, they fall in the more libertarian camp within mainstream liberalism: they’re against the war on drugs, pro-Snowden, etc.
Many Reddit liberals are atheists or agnostics, and look down upon religion and many religious people. They seek to base their world view around science and logic, both terms they’ll throw around non-stop. Frequently, they convince themselves that they are members of a small rational and enlightened group in comparison to others around them, often giving their ideology an elitist and technocratic flair. Their anti-theism is very important to them, and a lot of their worldview is informed by it: their support for gay marriage, legal abortion, GMOs, and so on. This often translates into Islamophobic viewpoints, some more overt than others, with Islam seen as a barbaric, woman-hating, regressive belief system.
As previously mentioned, they support separation of church and state, legal abortion, same-sex marriage, and a number of other social issues that they see as issues of science vs. religion. However, on many other cultural issues, they’re quite conservative in nature. The majority of Reddit liberals fall somewhere between “egalitarians” who believe that a mild, liberal feminism dealing with women’s issues should be complimented with a men’s rights movement dealing with men’s issues, to “men’s rights activists” who see feminism as an “illogical,” authoritarian, fundamentally anti-male ideology. Common beliefs associated with the latter group are that feminist issues like the wage gap and rape culture are non-problems backed only by misleading statistics, and while issues men face (bias in family courts, more dangerous jobs, male circumcision) are of much greater concern.
More generally, Reddit liberals can be classified as “anti-SJWs”: opposed to a number of forms of progressive social and cultural movements on the grounds that the plights of marginalized groups are either not as bad off as they say they are, that their plights are self-imposed, or that said groups are not actually marginalized. “Triggered!” jokes, criticizing black people rioting, critical of perceived “censorship” on college campuses, that sort of stuff.
Who you choose is by far the most important factor in all relationships. So it’s important to get really good at understanding the reality of relationships, love, and your specific person.
In my personal life, I meet all sorts of people. Some people are easy and fun to be around… I can spend hours with them, talking about things, laughing about things, and just genuinely enjoying their company. Being around them doesn’t require effort and I don’t want anything from them. I would have just as much fun driving in the car with them and chatting as I would doing something “exciting.”
On the other hand, there are people who I meet that immediately make me feel uncomfortable and defensive. I feel like I have to constantly be on my toes, choose my words carefully, and being around them is far from pleasurable.
Between those two extremes, there are all sorts of people who fall somewhere in the middle.
What has always amazed me when it comes to relationships is how people completely disregard compatibility. They describe what it’s like to be with their person and it almost sounds like they’re talking about their arch-enemy… there is no comfort, no trust, no compatibility.
Sometimes the relationship started out well and then over time disintegrated into something that resembles resentment and abuse rather than love or respect. Sometimes the relationship was never good to begin with, but they are hoping for “relationship magic” to “make it work.” This is what I equate to trying to shove a square peg into a round hole.
Personally, I needed to date around and experience several relationships before I had a good understanding of what I really wanted, valued, and what resonated with me in a relationship.
I realize now how much I value having a person who really “gets” me… a person that I can talk to for hours every day and never feel bored… a person who I can laugh with for hours and hours on end… a person that I know how to be there for and who knows how to be there for me.
It took me a while to figure that out. When I realized it, I mentally revisited my past relationships and realized something very important that I want to pass along to you…
When I think of relationships that didn’t work out for me in the past, I realize that the person I was with at the time was never going to be that person with me. Even if they wanted it to work.
I can clearly see now, years later after all the emotion and attachment is completely gone, we never would have reached that level of intimacy that is ultimately valuable to me in a relationship.
I couldn’t see past my attachment to those relationships, though, or past my blind desire to make things work because I didn’t want to fail, I didn’t want to be rejected, and I didn’t want to lose someone.
All those emotions have nothing to do with love or compatibility. They’re just fear, ego, and a false sense of identifying with relationship success.
Real relationship success is not about making a relationship with someone work when, at your core, you are ultimately incompatible. It can be hard to see if you’re blinded by fears of loss, self-doubt and relationship fantasies that you want to come true.
The thing to realize is that people with great relationships don’t have the great relationships because they know great relationship secrets or psychological loopholes of the male or female mind. Fundamentally, people in the best relationships all have one thing in common: they don’t have relationships with people who are not a good match for them. They don’t let them into their life.
And what’s the easiest way to know if they’re a good match or not? Plain and simple – how do you feel about yourself when you’re with that person? Do you feel better about yourself? About life? About the things that upset you?
Or… do you feel insecure? Do you feel like you’re walking on eggshells? Do you feel like you’re suffocating… holding your breath in anticipation of a relationship that you desperately want to come into existence but always seems just out of reach? Helpless, powerless, and afraid they’ll do something to hurt you?
How you feel with the person you’re with is the best indication of whether you’re with someone who’s compatible or not. How much you want it to work is the worst indicator of a good relationship.
Creating the foundation for a strong, healthy relationship comes down to putting energy into the right places. Worrying and stressing is not putting energy into the right places.
If you’re still stuck in feeling needy and out of control, you’re not going to see the necessity of bringing that value to the relationship because you’ll still be fixated on your own worries, your fears, your insecurities. And with that fixation, you won’t be able to put energy into the relationship, you’ll have wasted all your energy needlessly worrying about stuff.
I understand that after you’ve been continually hurt and disappointed by previous relationships, you may have formed some insecurities and frustration around relationships. But in the end, those emotions do nobody a favor – they repel people, they waste your energy, and they make everyone miserable.
The only way to get out of that cycle and move towards building a firm foundation that leads to a good relationship is to find your own self-love and fulfillment independent of a relationship.
The energy you put into the relationship is the only thing that matters. Putting energy doesn’t come from a self-absorbed place, it isn’t attached to feelings of anxiety, fear, worry, anger, rage, resentment. You are outside of yourself and putting energy into giving that “extra something” that makes you valuable, rare, and inspirational.
Remember: a relationship will never fill an emotional void, complete you, or “make you” happy. You have to show up to a relationship “whole” and happy already.
A Womans Guide to a Happier, More Fulfilling Relationship
Courtship is, more than anything else, an act of Adoration. To be courted you must summon the self-confidence to expect and demand his adoration, to become the object of his desires. Easier said than done, right? Well, not by much.
The only difficult step, it turns out, is to understand and decide with absolute and unswerving sincerity that your fundamental feminine goal is to be “Worshiped” by your Man. We’ll discuss how later but for now, you only must dedicate yourself to that goal. That is not to say that you will measure your self-esteem by your lovers attention. Rather, you will not accept anything less from your Male than the outright proper worship and adoration that you rightfully deserve as a Woman.
Please understand, that you are worthy of his adoration by the very fact that you are female. You need no further justification than that. It is profoundly true, that at the core, “You” are his deepest desire and fulfillment, therefore he should adore you. As a Female, You have within you, powerful erotic natural potential. That potential was not lost with your youth. It is there still waiting to be reawakened. You must reawaken it within yourself first ladies.
To become the object of his worship, as you should be, you must learn to comfortably make the most of your erotic potential with your Partner.
This will become the focal point of your new relationship. This is not to say that it is a substitute for love. On the contrary, it will become for both of you a new and powerful expression of your love for one another. This feminine worship philosophy will shape and transform the psyche of both the male and female over time. Your kindness, generosity, and nurturing love for him remains certain and unconditional as before. It is the romance only, which becomes uncertain and conditional. It is important to distinguish between these two ideas.
Don’t worry if you lack confidence in the beginning. Take baby steps to find your Feminine Confidence building with the positive results you experience in your relationship. But do not confuse your lack of confidence with your commitment. Be committed and find your way to fulfilling that commitment. Age is not a factor. Weight is not a factor. Beauty is not a factor. These things are not relevant here. Sexual attraction is 90% mental, only 10% physical. Most women are harder on themselves than are their boyfriends. You don’t need to be a beauty queen to be an absolute Sex Goddess in his eyes. Females have the natural addictive essence to attract, captivate, and hold sway over men !!! It is within you from birth and you just need to release it. If you will release this powerful feminine essence within you, you will have your man begging to romance you. It’s all about how you act, not how you look. It’s the attitude.
This works for one very simple reason: Your Male Needs and Wants to Worship You. He may not be consciously aware of it but the male psychology fundamentally desires “matriarchy”. As we have already seen, as much as you desire to be courted, so your boyfriend desires to court. It’s our nature as human beings. You need only “Exploit” that desire ladies. The nature of this Desire is, Obviously, Sexual. Sex is the goal. And, not coincidentally, it is the means as well. Sexual desire is what stimulates romantic passion.
Anticipation is greater than realization
To further understand this most basic aspect of human relations you must appreciate the essential difference in female and male sexuality. Whereas most couples pay only lip service to their differences, women who fully appreciate these differences are able to tap directly into the inherent erotic potential within their relationships.
Some males who discover their own needs in this regard (to worship woman) will go to enormous lengths to persuade their girlfriends to exercise this erotic potential with them. Because of old fashioned social taboos however, regarding the exercise of pure feminine power in relationships, it can be difficult for some women to be comfortable with their erotic potential even when their boyfriends are begging for it.
As we have seen, the most tangible aspect of romance for your boyfriend/husband is the pleasurable “addictive” activity of sex. Based on the biological imperatives in the make up of men, the apex of his sexual activity must be the ejaculation and expulsion of his semen. Therefore in order to re-stoke the dormant furnace of your husbands desire, it is necessary for the wife to establish “Control” of the activities of sex and most importantly to slowly but carefully remove the certainty of ejaculation from the sexual equation. Only then, will the male truly begin to realize and understand, that his prize must once again be courted and won, on a continual and daily basis. The man, rather than becoming the conqueror, remains the eternal suitor, and when the couple goes to bed, courtship continues to flourish. Under these playful new arrangements, making love retains its older, courtly connotations.
It’s important to understand that men are always in the mood for sex. This is the way men are biologically wired. And it is not difficult for men to have orgasms. Men orgasm, as a matter of course. A man who is concentrating on achieving his orgasm can do so in a matter of a few minutes. Strictly speaking then, biology has programmed men to engage in an activity that consists of a few minutes of friction leading to ejaculation. You surely noticed that there is no requirement in this process for a woman to climax or even to enjoy the activity. It is only when the sexual needs of women are taken into account that the act of sex turns into something more than the absolute basics above, and evolves into cherished “Love-making”. Coincidentally as men learn to accommodate those needs and reciprocate the women’s desire, they find that their own enjoyment of sexual activity greatly increases. Thus for example, engaging in lengthy sexual sessions with various acts of foreplay and after play add nothing to the primal urge of the male. However although it does have as its primary and actual goal, the pleasure of the female partner, it can also become intensely pleasurable to the male as well, in large part because of his perception that the female is satisfied. Through this the male learns that he can increase and prolong his sexual pleasure, by postponing & delaying his orgasm and concentrating on the female-centric activities.
Dr George Gilder notes in his book - Men and Marriage: Women need to learn to manipulate male sexual desire in order to teach their men the long-term cycles of female sexuality and biology on which civilization is based.
The problem is, that while a man may genuinely seek to satisfy his princesses sexually, his natural, innate tendency is to achieve his primal goal, which is consummation of intercourse, with a minimal expenditure of energy. Even men who try to overcome these primal tendencies will only be partially successful. After all, that’s precisely what evolution has bred him to do for a millennium, that’s how the male of the species maximizes his genetic contribution.
Clearly these primitive goals are in clear conflict of a passionate, female centric, love making session and more often than not, in the passion of making love, it is the primal instincts which usually win out. He doesn’t mean to be this way, but he is. Only you, the astute female, can change this by Taking Control of the situation, and ensuring that his ejaculation takes place at a suitable time, when “You” decide to allow them.
As we have seen, it is the attention to the females needs, that Always makes sex a thoroughly enjoyable activity for both man and woman. Therefore it’s only logical that you must subliminally train your male, that sex is for “Your” benefit, Not His!!! It is not the case that he is no longer “allowed” to enjoy sex. On the contrary, you will both find, that under the new arrangement, he will be more excited, more robust, more blissed out, and more satisfied than ever. It simply means that men want to please their women in bed and that when sexual energy is directed and focused on your feminine pleasure and satisfaction, your man will inevitably be more satisfied as well. His satisfaction may take new and varied forms, but he will definitely increase his overall satisfaction level along with yours.
The arrangement that you now want to establish as a couple is simply this: intimate activities happen when you, the woman, want them to happen, and how “you” want them to happen. You do not have sexual intercourse simply because your man is desperately aroused. You engage in intimate activity when “You the female” are in the mood for it, and “you” decide the type of activity that you are in the mood for. Both the male & female then slowly begin to understand and fundamentally acknowledge, that the woman’s satisfaction and pleasure are of paramount inportance!!! The satisfaction that he gains from your playful sexual sessions will be in direct proportion to the pleasure you his queen experiences.
As we move forward in this particular part of the discussion, consider the following excerpt from Orgasms for Two: The Joy of Partner Sex by Betty Dodson Ph.D.
The Myth of Foreplay
It’s totally understandable why heterosexual men and women want to climax from penile/vagina sex - how convenient, how easy, and how wonderful to have partner sex be consistently and mutually orgasmic. However, if Romeo’s pulsating desperate erection, moving sweetly inside Juliet’s wet enveloping vagina provides orgasms for nearly every man but only a mere handful of women, what are we going to do about the majority of women who cannot climax from vaginal penetration alone? We can broaden our definition of partner sex to include some form of direct stimulation of a woman’s clitoris either manually or with a vibrator during heterosexual lovemaking.
Let’s start with the concept of foreplay. Women’s magazines as well as many sex books emphasize the importance of “foreplay” for couples. We are told that women want more of it and men don’t do enough of it. It’s been my observation that a little appetizer of kissing, breast fondling, and clitoral touching before the main course of penetration is seldom enough to satisfy the sexual appetite of most healthy red-blooded women. Just as she is getting excited from some form of pleasurable direct clitoral contact, he stops and suddenly penetrates her surprised vagina. While he is enjoying his ideal erotic sensation, with his hyper sensitive joystick moving inside her velvety loins, she is now struggling to get a little indirect clitoral contact, which for most women can’t compare to consistent clitoral stimulation all the way to orgasm.
Imagine a man being TOLD he can rub his erection inside a woman’s glorious silky vagina as foreplay, but when it’s time for Him to orgasm, she must be sitting on his face, penetrating his mouth with her clitoris.
This will give him a “Nice Ruined Orgasm.” He must not reach down and touch his oh so desperate erection while she is face fucking him in the mouth or she’ll think her clitoris isn’t big enough to provide him with an orgasm. To protect her fragile female ego, he ends up faking orgasm, but he figures it’s worth it to keep the peace. Later on he figures, he can masturbate in the bathroom, or if she’s a sound sleeper, he can finish himself off in bed providing he can cum while holding his breath and not moving so as not to wake her.
Instead of using the word “foreplay,” we need to think of a new term to use, such as “sexplay.” Most women desire clitoral pleasure in the beginning of, during, and sometimes even after partner sex, especially if the woman wants to more than once !!!
As Dr. Dodson so beautifully illustrates above, there is just so much more to sexual fun than simply the penetration of the vagina with the erect penis. Penetrative intercourse does not, and should not be the omnipresent main course of a couples sex life. A sexual experience need not consist of a series of brief appetizers followed by the sexual main course of ejaculative intercourse. In fact each pleasurable activity is in itself, worthy of being a main course. There are times when one enjoys a 5 course meal, but very often a single course meal will also suffice. You as the queenly woman, should feel free to choose such a single course meal from the entire smorgasbord of sexual & intimate activity available to you, if you so wish.
As we consider how to implement this new philosophy into your life, a great many ladies would interject that sex with their male, always ends in penetrative intercourse ejaculation. How does one move away from that habitual destructive habit to this new beneficial paradigm? First, immediate ejaculation must not be the all-encompassing essential goal for men, despite what most women might believe. Second, as with most aspects of human behavior, the answer is to take a gradual approach. You Must “Ease Him”into his subjugation Slowly over Time…
Learning how to lengthen the arousal and erection period while delaying & denying the male an orgasm is a fundamentally important part of maximizing the enjoyment from sex. As an males erection strengthens, the physical sensations become increasingly more and more exciting, and the psychological pressure within the primitive male brain to ejaculate becomes more and more intense, thanks to dopamine. The trick ladies is to lean to “Keep” the males stimulation “Just Below” the level required for ejaculation, while he learns to deal with the increasing mental & psychological pressure to ejaculate. Like driving a racing car closer and closer to a wall at ever higher speeds, the psychological pleasure inside of the male mind becomes more and more intense. The longer the arousal and “Edging” can be maintained without ejaculation occuring, the greater the utter bliss will be for the man. Furthermore, the longer this heightened state of arousal can be maintained, the more powerful and enjoyable the eventual orgasm will be. Thus, developing skills for achieving this goal and dealing with the psychological desire to ejaculate, for as long as possible, are essential for the full enjoyment of partner (and solo) sex, and this is what requires “practice”. Women usually require a somewhat longer period of time to become fully aroused, so being able to manage, delay & deny your man’s orgasm will naturally increase the enjoyment of sexual intercourse by both partners.
Many women believe that men are happier the more frequently they have Orgasm. This is not really accurate. What has been found is that men truly enjoy being highly aroused “Edged” deep within their partner, while their partner is also highly aroused. In this way, as the male is held captive & imprisoned deep inside of the woman, both can remain in a highly aroused state for a very long period of time, especially with the use of a strategically placed vibrating bullet. Thus, delaying & denying male orgasm for as long as possible is what femdom & karezza are all about.
The first step in this evolution process is to establish in both your mind and your males mind, the link between his ejaculation and your feminine consent. As the Lady who is courted, it is very important for your stud muffin to please you. Therefore at this stage you simply want to establish the request and consent structure that will be an important part of your interaction. This is as simple as getting your man to inform you of his impending eruption, before he loses control & ejaculates, ensuring he asks your consent before doing so. At this initial stage this is essentially your man wanting to ensure that you (His Queen) has been sufficiently stimulated enough during your lovemaking session and that the mutual timing is right for him to orgasm, and consequently end the sexual session. After the male ejaculates, it is very rare for lovemaking to continue.
Therefore when the male approaches his peak, he should ask his woman in terms that she is comfortable with, for her “approval” of his orgasm. In The Beginning, I would recommend that the lady assent, usually in an enthusiastic manner and let him proceed to his climax. As noted, the purpose of this stage is to connect, in both the male and female mind, the act of ejaculation, with the approval from the woman for such action to take place. This process of request & consent will form the very important basis of what is to follow.
As Soon as possible, the woman should start to use her intuition, to masterfully time the males ejaculation to coincide with her own desires. The difference between this stage and the previous one, is that “Now” the ladies permission for the male to Ejaculate, will Not automatically & immediately follow the man’s request as before. Therefore when the man asks for permission to ejaculate, the woman will now seek to delay his orgasmic explosion till the moment that she prefers. This may entail a delay of a few seconds to several minutes or even longer, depending upon the circumstances. Even if she has experienced a fulfilling satisfactory sexual session to this point and sees no particular sensory advantage to herself in delaying & denying his orgasm when he asks, it is important at this stage for her to deny the initial and subsequent requests. Thus, she is appropriately making her male wait, even if only for a matter of a few minutes, establishing her “assent” as the primary trigger for his properly managed orgasm.
The goal at this juncture is to powerfully condition both the male and female psyche, to the concept and realization, that approval for the male orgasm need not necessarily follow immediately after a males pleading request. There should be no automatic immediate rubber-stamp to the man’s request either, but rather a conscious thought out decision made by you, His Supreme Ruler. “You” as a female, have the sovereign right and authority, to in fact delay and deny your approval, until that moment in time that meets with your preference. You are powerfully training his subconscious and his future ejaculations with the femdom art of “Karezza” in this way !!!
As your comfort level increases with the concept of approving your lovers ejaculations, you will rapidly move to the stage where your male will really begin to appreciate the fact, that there are restrictions in the path to his pursuit of Orgasm. At this final stage in your intimate training activities, the man will ask for permission from his lady to ejaculate as usual. Now, however, you will raise the hurdle that the male must overcome to please you his princess. You must answer in the negative when he asks permission to ejaculate. Your love making session should continue to supply you, his Queen with the quantity and quality of sexual stimulation and Orgasmic Bliss that “You” desire but it Must Conclude Without your Male experiencing Ejaculative Orgasm.
This will establish a fundamentally important milestone in your sexual relationship. You will have abundantly reinforced the fact, that you his Queen & Supreme Ruler are in Total and Complete Control of the Lovemaking Process. Your Stud Muffin will no longer be able to take for granted that your romantic interludes will result in an ejaculative orgasm for his elated enjoyment. As a consequence, with tease & denial, He will get Hornier & Hornier as his Libido Beautifully Builds from day to day, while you frequently and freely experience Orgasmic Bliss to your utter hearts content… Such a Win-Win if you ask me !!!
The Longer The Male Waits For his Ladies Permission to Orgasm (With Routine and Habitual, Tease and Denial) The Better, Stronger & More Appreciative He Will Be when IT’s finally Permitted…
With “Karezza” Sex, the Male Is Always Horny and “Wanting” Due to (Routine & Habitual) Prevention & Denial of Ejaculative Orgasm, and thus Always Desires his Princess and Her Glorious Heavenly Femininity.
The MAIN purpose of “Karezza” is the Maintenance and Indeed The Intensification of Desire in the Male, But Also, Much More Frequent Enjoyment of Blissful Sexual Pleasure of both the Male & Female within the context of Their Relationship.
Subliminally, The Male Quickly Learns through (Repetitive Conditioning), That His Throbbing, Pulsating, Desperate Erection Is Ultimately for his Ladies Orgasmic Pleasure, Dominance and Entertainment, Not For His Ejaculation !!!
The first time you engage in a sexual activity with your male, that has, as its sole purpose, “Him Pleasing You”; it will quite possibly feel somewhat exotic and a little foreign to your experience. But as you get over the novelty of the event you will find it a tremendously empowering and a very erotically fulfilling experience. Some women say that they get an erotic power rush from the routine & habitual “male orgasm denial” experience, however some say they initially feel guilty about the increased frequency of the number of glorious orgasms that they have versus the Very Few that their males ultimately have, But most women get over this guilt in no time !!!
This sometimes is the most difficult moment for many women who follow this program. I always feel it essential to once again remind women at this point that everything in this program is consensual for both the male and female and it requires whole-hearted support from both. Also you must keep in mind that ejaculation is not denied to your male, merely rationed for better intimacy & performance and that this is all part of a process to enable you and your male to rekindle the diminishing romantic love between you. By you making this important final step of not consenting to his most wanted ejaculation, essentially the love making session has not closed for him but will continue into the next day, and throughout the day, and on into the next, ECT…
It also paradoxically extends and intensifies the males pleasure and prolonged bliss, saving him from a quick release followed by an even quicker loss of desire, climax and anti-climax and produces a wonderful sexual tension and hunger that far exceeds the short-lived orgasm in excitement and intensity.
As one husband reported:
My wife absolutely plays me like a finely tuned piano. She’s like a Mozart in concert. Dont get me wrong, I’m not protesting, I’m bragging. I’m right where I want to be, caught in her omnipotent feminine clutches, and I wouldn’t want to trade places with any other man on earth. I’ve discovered that the remarkable joy of constant arousal, being imprisoned and held completely captive, deep inside of my queen while she climaxes freely, and the “Edging” she is so proficient at, far outweighs the momentary experience of an over rated ejaculative orgasm.
Another husband, who is rationed, admitted that:
It is a very erotic experience for me. Even at work my woman is constantly on my mind.
A third writes:
My wife likes to kiss me, hug me, get me all excited, and then send me off to work. Her feelings and thoughts and touches remain on my mind all day long and I just can’t wait for the day to end so I can see her. Therefore, when we finally have sex at her choosing, it is such an exciting cherished time for me.
Ladies, Once you pass this important milestone, you will find in your subsequent love making sessions that your lover will be more enthusiastic, more caring, more interested in pleasing you. Enjoy his attentions, revel in his Adoration.
…the More he is Controlled the more he will “Want” to be Controlled….
…it’s like a snowball… Woman just has to start the process and “Mother Nature” will “INDEED” lead the Male Psyche to seek more arousal drug (Dopamine) in his system by delaying his orgasm further and further…..
You will soon find that the more you manage, restrict & deny your Males ejaculations, the more he will naturally desire and pursue you. This will of course result in more attention, more caring, more love, more romance, in short more courtship. As you move into this phase you will need to establish the balance point at which it becomes wisest to grant your Stud Muffin his orgasm. Depending on your age, lifestyle, libido and the frequency of your sexual sessions before you began this program, you will need to decide on a starting point and work from there. I usually advise younger ladies who might have sex 3 or more times a week to start allowing male orgasm at weekly intervals, middle-aged couples with more involved lifestyles, possibly with children, who might be having sex 1 or 2 times a week could start with allowing a bi-weekly male orgasm. Wherever you start, you will need to gradually start increasing the length of time between “His” orgasms until you reach the point of maximum effectiveness. This will be the point at which the caring and romance start to turn towards, irritation and negative behavior. When you see this type of behavior developing, you should back off the length slightly and use this as your guidepost going forward. Timeframes that Ladies establish can vary from 7 - 14 days, to as much as 30 days or longer. Typically 30 days is not unusual for couples in their 40s or 50s. As in all we have discussed previously, be prepared Ladies to listen to your beloved’s feedback, both verbal and non-verbal, to guide you to the best balance.
Once you reach this final stage and settle in at an appropriate level, all you need do is maintain this level as you move forward. It should be blatantly obvious that implied in this “Karezza” Training program, will be the fact that “You” should be setting a scheduled day for his next ejaculation in advance. This may well be as simple as deciding that the first Saturday of the month is your preferred day or may involve a more elaborate scheduling mechanism. In any case, the request/consent mechanism we have discussed should remain in place throughout. To keep things interesting, the next date should only be known by “You” his Queen. This will keep up the suspense and maintain your males attentiveness. As such, spot decisions during your multi orgasmic love making sessions are not recommended. You will invariably be distracted by your own sensations and find it difficult to make such decisions. Therefore it is highly recommended that you make your schedule at some prior moment and then stick to it. Some degree of variation of the date can also be used to maintain a healthy degree of anticipation for you both.
As you become more comfortable with the cycle you can even experiment with changing the scheduled date based on your Stud Muffins “Performance”. Consider awarding bonus points for exceptional performance by your man. These can be used to shorten the interval until his next ejaculation date. On the flip side deduct points for undesirable behavior on your boyfriends part. These negative points will lengthen the cycle. This type of carrot & stick approach can add a whole new level of Femdom playfulness into the program.
No doubt those of you who have some familiarity with the wide world of sexual practices will note a similarity to the Tantric Sexual practice in our program. One of the practices of Tantra does in fact include the concept of the male withholding his explosive ejaculation.
Withholding ejaculation has its roots in Tantra; in Maithun, it is important that the man not discharge his semen because it is considered a precious product of the life force. Semen and the males un-wasted sexual energy are transmuted into a finer substance that nourishes the higher centers of the body, which prepares it for the spiritual transformation that is the goal of Tantra. In Maithuna, the lady is free to achieve and enjoy orgasmic bliss at anytime during the ritual: The Womans excitement and orgasmic bliss indeed produces a precious vaginal secretion that the experienced tantric man then naturally “absorbs” through his thin skinned, blood filled, pulsing, captive, erect penis. The valuable female ejaculate, enveloping the imprisoned “Edged” erection is widely believed to tremendously enrich and nourish the males natural hormonal system, which further aids in the spiritual transformation of the united intimate couple.
Leaving aside the metaphysical, spiritually transformative aspects of Tantra we can see that the concepts we are working with here are not dissimilar. One essential difference however, is that the Tantra form of abstinence is self-motivated by the male. In other words, although the male ejaculation is withheld/managed/denied as with our “Karezza” program, with Tantra, it is the male himself who decides if & when he ejaculates.
The all-important and essential feature of the subliminal “Karezza” training program discussed above, is the powerful psychologically transforming principle, that it is the “Female” who “Sovereignly” makes the decision about whether the male is allowed to ejaculate OR NOT !!!
The Female Has Total Dominion Over The Male (Femdom) JUST AS NATURE INTENDED !
Now that you have reached a point where you are strategically rationing your males ejaculations to once every 30 days or so as you permit, you should feel free to explore the varieties of sexual experiences alluded to by Ms Dr Dodson in her book. This “Karezza” program is most definitely not about “You” waiting 30 days to have an orgasm with your boyfriend/ lover. If you are not Fully and Freely enjoying yourself and experiencing “Many” orgasms during the month, you have missed the entire point of this lesson and will be overlooking the critical and beneficial Never-ending vaginal stimulation that your man NEEDS to keep him “In Tune” so to speak…
Now that you have read through this material, take some time to think it over and discuss it with your Lover. If he is the one who has pointed you to this article, you have a leg up on implementing this program since he will most likely be very agreeable. If you have discovered this material on your own or through the intercession of a friend it is probably a good idea to ask your boyfriend/husband to read it through also.
If you are like most women, you will certainly have read or seen other material which discuss romance and marriage. While there may have been some variety in what you might have found, undoubtedly one of the main pieces of advice to rekindle romance will recommend that you try and get away for a romantic dinner or weekend alone with your man. This fantasy island scenario presumes that a brief dose of romance will suffice to counterbalance the tedium that will resume on your return to normal life. Those who have tried these types of outings will no doubt affirm that they enjoyed the outings but that upon their return to normal life, the benefit dissipated fairly quickly. Now having read the “Wisdom” contained in these pages, the answer should be quite apparent. These outings while enjoyable, do not in themselves address the fundamental issue. They still proceed under the assumption that the romance has been won. So in effect, trying to emulate activities from your courting days while enjoyable in themselves, does not address the fundamental problem of romance. This is a little like a football player being asked to don his old uniform and replay the moments from the big game or asking the hunter to take out his rifle and re-stalk the moose head hanging on his basement wall. There will certainly be some joy for the person in retelling the story or reliving the moments, but these will pale in comparison to the original activity and quickly fade with repeated telling.
The beauty of “Karezza” Training is that it does not involve a brief departure into a fantasy world and then a return to one’s everyday life. This ideology will become your everyday life and of course, That Is The Key. As such, it does not require any special preparations, nor does not require any travel, and it does not require any reservations. Coincidentally is a lot less expensive.
My final advice is to remember and convey, that this path is for you to travel jointly. As I have emphasized throughout, discuss this article, your thoughts and your plans with your Boyfriend. Communication is one of the most basic foundations of a good & lasting relationship. Take a gradual but urgent approach to the changes suggested here. When you are comfortable with one stage, move to another. As you move through this program you will find that your males desire to ”Please You” will naturally spread into the other areas of your relationship. You will find that he consults you more on financial decisions, on balancing work and family, even on his choice of friends. Everything will change for the better if you lay the foundation correctly.
When you practice the philosophies laid out in this article, you will be happier and your play mate will be happier. Your boyfriend/husband is happier because he is now a hero. He comes to your rescue by his continual romantic pursuit, by doing the things “You Need” and by thoroughly satisfying you sexually. You are happier because you are now the object of his undying worship, you have someone to talk to and do the things “You Desire” and because you are finally enjoying blissful orgasmic sex, frequently with your man again.
Indulge your wildest fantasies. As the Lady & Queen of the house, set yourself upon a pedestal and let your knight worship and pursue you romantically throughout the days and weeks to follow. It’s amazing how many aspects of your life your new relationship will touch.
Hopefully both you and your boyfriend/husband having read and put into practice the preceding material have seen the benefits of this approach. Unfortunately, due to the weakness of the human spirit, problems may develop. The basic premise as we have seen involves the woman managing and rationing the ejaculations of her male. It is quite possible that a situation may develop wherein the male decides to ejaculate of his own accord. I am speaking of course of solo masturbation.
Without wanting to shock my female readers, I feel constrained to inform you that all men will eventually masturbate. Let me repeat that for those not paying attention ALL men will masturbate. The timing and frequency may be at issue but not the basic fact. Somet men masturbate on a daily basis. If you think your man is different try this little test. Ask him out of the blue some day or quiet evening if he masturbates. Inevitably the response will consist of flustering and stuttering, red faces and finally a denial. But if you have been married to him for a while, you’ll see right through the denial.
Wives whose husbands are participating in this program will of course Not want their men to masturbate because it defeats the purpose of this program. Interestingly enough, males will not want to masturbate either, because this will also ruin the program for them. However, the flesh can be weak and it is difficult to overcome a lifetime of habit. Therefore I recommend that Ladies should do all they can to ensure that their play things do not in fact succumb to this temptation. So what can be done?
It is not really practical to monitor your man constantly including when he showers and uses the toilet so alternatives should be explored. I submit that that women should consider the option of a chastity device that can be locked on the genitals to help keep idle hands from play. While this may sound a little too kinky to some, these devices are very popular and amazing mainstream.
This isn’t as kinky as it sounds
Considering our goals, using a device of this type can be a source of additional spice in the relationship we are creating. People being what they are, in a situation where one person gives physical control of his sex organs to someone else, the arousal usually becomes extremely intense. The partner who wears the chastity device has given the partner who has the “key” the ability to decide when sex can take place. Since our goal is managed and rationed ejaculation, these devices effectively prevent masturbation, it means that our program becomes that much more effective while providing an extra mental level of constant titillation. This can be a great deal of fun for both people. When you hear that click as the lock closes, and you both realize that you “His Queen” are holding the only key, this will provide a mental rush for both parties.
As with all else in this article, I recommend discussing and exploring this option with your husband. Should you jointly decide that you are interested in pursuing this course I would advise you to start with the device called a CB-6000. This is an inexpensive, adjustable, comfortable device with a fair degree of security and can be worn for long periods undetected under clothing once the wearer becomes accustomed to it.
Even if you don’t feel worried or concerned with the thought of him selfishly masturbating , such a device is a wonderful addition to your relationship. When he is wearing a chastity device and you “His Empress” are holding the only key, you have just magnified the amount of his attention on you! Every day that goes by, as the testosterone levels increase, he will love you for taking control of his orgasms away from him and you will love the new man in your life. Remind him often, that you have the key, the one and only key, to his sexual release. If You proudly wear it around your neck, on a chain for him & all to see, you may have the opportunity to start up an enlightening conversation when another female dares to ask you what the key it stands for. Who knows, Maybe you will save another womans relationship, by referring her to this program…
I encourage you to read classical myths with their context in mind, but I also believe there is much worth in reading them with a different mindset in mind, with personal consideration to who is a bad person because the narrative told you, and who is a bad person for real, and the same for the good guys.
Medea is a good example, like in that last post. Kriemhild/Gudrun’s and Brynhildr’s tale, both their shared parts and their individual parts, also apply. Once you step away from the fundamentally male-centric nature of old cultures, the stories of Kriemhild and Brynhildr turn into the story of how Kriemhild was passive and suffered from it (by subjecting her to her well intentioned but ultimately very controlling mother and her plans, and also remember that her mother was pure evil), and when she stopped following her mom’s commands, she turned into a damn badass that ended up feeding Attila the Hun his own kids before burning him, and his officers, to cinders. Bryn, meanwhile, is a less flattering image of a woman, whose entire schtick, in the end, is to be the ideal wife and the vengeful woman scorned rolled in one, down to her love suicide. Bryn was seen as ideal, while Kriem was seen as evil at worst and morally ambiguous grey at best, because she took matters into her own hands and ended up rebelling against the life of a woman who had to 1) follow what her parents said and 2) just marry and be happy with that.
do you have any tips for an artist, who has struggle with manly hips? I just can add legs after I sketched a body D:
Ahh, so you’re having issues with the male figure, huh? Well, I wish I had the time to work out a quick walkthrough of how I manage it, but this might help: think of the figure you’re drawing in overall shapes, first. Don’t go for details right away – look at the overall silhouette.
Now, that aside, a quick look on Google gave me some good references for drawing dudes, though many that you’ll find tend to use super buff dudes as reference:
Now remember, there is no better reference than reality. What you might notice about a typical male figure is that, fundamentally, a body that’s grown and developed with a lot of testosterone is going to be shaped differently than one that’s been mostly influenced by estrogen and progesterone. A female figure will have wider hips – this is a sexual feature that allows for the skeleton to manage childbearing. This causes the female body to develop with what’s typically called an hourglass shape, with a narrow waist and wider hips. Of course, there are variations on the exact proportions – some ladies have wider waists than hips!
Men typically develop with narrower hips, as their bodies do not develop to bear children. Physically, they develop in a way that would be more efficient for building muscle to do hard work. (In many mammalian species similar to humans, this is the case – while the females are dealing with childbearing, the males do more of the heavy lifting. Attribute this to biology and evolution! :D)
A male physique, at its core skeletal structure, typically has narrow hips and broader shoulders. The distribution of weight between these two points on the body varies from guy to guy, but assuming we’ve got a guy who keeps himself in decent shape with a balance of cardio exercise and weightlifting, he’ll usually have a slightly narrow dip around his waist, with an otherwise gradual change in width from the hips to the shoulders. It helps to take a look at the muscular structure to see how all the pieces fall in place.
Remember: as with drawing anything, don’t immediately go for stylization! When I draw, say, Lewis Pepper from Mystery Skulls, I simplify the human shape a TON and break a TON of rules for it, right? It only works, though, because I know how the rules are supposed to work and can tweak them to a certain effect. You gotta know how to follow the rules before you can break ‘em – it’ll make drawing the thing in your style later on MUCH easier!
Hope this all helps, man! If you have any more specific questions, I’ll do my best to answer them.
Hi!!! I feel so dumb but I haven't found what "gender critical" means. I am usually pretty on top of understanding and educating myself on this type of stuff (i'm a first year gender and sexuality major). But can you explain to me exactly what being "gender critical" means? Thank you very much if you reply, I just don't ever want to be ignorant about this type of stuff.
“Gender-critical” means taking a critical look at how gender operates, and the relation between sex and gender. This perspective is informed by a radical feminist analysis of gender: specifically, that while human beings are sexually dimorphic (there are two sexes, female and male, which are fundamentally different in terms of reproductive capacity), the system of sex role stereotypes (aka “gender”) is a man-made concept, which males created in order to maintain supremacy over females. (Note that women also help to enforce sex-role conformity, often under the guise of third-wave “feminism”: this is why feminism which focuses on female liberation is critical!)
A gender-critical analysis posits that the vast majority of behavioral differences between males and females can be traced back to the prison of gender, and that the liberation of women requires the dismantling of this system, in part through the abolition of gender. In a world without gender, females and males would be able to reach their full potentials without being hampered by sex role stereotypes at every turn.
In order to maintain the sex-based hierarchy, the system of gender requires strict enforcement of sex-role stereotypes. A primary method is the naturalization of sex-role stereotypes, which is where biological determinism comes from. (All the “boys will be boys” and “Well, you know girls…” excuses.) People grow up with this biological determinism already naturalized, and believe in it so strongly that they help to enforce it themselves. That’s why many people consider gender as a kind of auto-panopticon: we are all the jailers, and the jailed.
Gender-critical analysis gives primary focus to sex, not to the modern concept of gender identification. If identification mattered, then women of the 1910’s could have just “identified” as men and gotten the vote! Likewise, when Simone de Beavoir said “One is not born a woman, one becomes one”, she was talking about something that is imposed upon people born female. Giving primacy to sex is not due to a biologically essentialist belief that sex determines behavior. Rather, it is due to the reality that patriarchy operates along the lines of sex, using gender to maintain this hierarchy, and that sex-based socialization is a strong predictor of behavior. Consider this: when a man decides to rape a woman, does he ask the woman if she “identifies” as a man first? And if the woman did id as male, would the man actually stop? And also consider this: for all the talk of trans men having “male socialization”, the rates of criminality among trans men are significantly lower than that of (male) men. In contrast, when people say “trans women are women”, they are (whether intentionally or accidentally) erasing the fact that trans women, having been socialized as males, have the same rate of criminality (including violent crime) as all males. In fact, anecdotally it appears that trans women are more likely to commit sex crimes than the “average” male, at least the way that “trans woman” is currently defined - that is, purely as a self-reported identification. (Please note: as a trans women, both the criminality statistics in the Dhejne study and the thousands of cases of trans women committing sex crimes make me sick - but pretending that it is “only a stereotype” that many trans women are sexually predatory isn’t helping the women that many of my so-called “sisters” are raping with their dicks. Enough is fucking enough! Not in my name anymore!)
It is currently popular to slur women with a gender-critical perspective as “TERF"s. (If you’re not aware that TERF is a slur, please review this collection of tweets and posts by trans women and allies telling TERFs to die, get murdered, and choke on dicks.) Sometimes, trans women who are gender-critical also get slurred as TERFs, which if you think about it literally doesn’t make sense. But let’s think for a moment about who is being more reasonable: a gender-critical analysis says "We believe in the right of all people to dress and behave as they wish. However, we recognize structural patterns of power that exist along the lines of sex, and we are not happy with the status quo of male dominance. And given this, we believe in the absolute right of people born and raised female to set their own boundaries!” The trans activist line says “A trans woman with a full beard and penis who hasn’t begun transition is still just as much of a woman as any other woman and trans women don’t have male privilege if they say they don’t also penis is female and ftm’s are the worst human garbage because they oppress everyone with their male privilege.” Like, seriously??? And just to be clear: I read trans activists and their allies saying those same things, word for word, every day on tumblr, facebook, blog posts, you name it. I am not exaggerating a single iota!
As you may have guessed, gender-critical is not the most popular train of thought in “gender studies” programs these days. This is because the neo-liberal philosophy of queer theory took over about twenty years ago. If you can do your part and inject some reality into your classmates, that would be terrific!
Why do you have such a big problem with male characters being female even once? Gender doesn't dictate personality, and it would huge for our representation in games/movies if we took the spotlight. A woman in her own Bond-like movie wouldn't make as big of a "women in action films" statement as a female Bond. And if there is a gender selection in a Zelda game, you never have to use it. And it won't change the game or Link at all- the canon isn't set in stone. So why push against the point?
Because gender DOES dictate personality, as much as people want to deny it. When you look at a female character, you see a different person compared to a male character. It’s a fundamental, base change in character design that alters the audience’s perception of the character. Thus, it is no longer the same iconic character. Trying to change a character’s gender for no real goddamn reason besides “muh equality” is insulting to the character, the character design, and the spirit and personality of the character. Men and women are different. This is a fact.
I DO NOT want a female Bond. That is INSULTING. It’s like saying: “Aww, poor women. The only way we can give them representation is to change a male character to female instead of actually being CREATIVE and giving them an ACTUAL female character.” See what I mean? Insulting and pandering.
Rey from Star Wars is a good example of ACTUAL female representation. She’s her own character. She’s awesome, she’s fun, she’s not super pander-y.
If you are SO CONCERNED with female representation in action movies, guess what? There is a new Lara Croft movie coming out. Lara is a female character, and has always been one. She’s awesome. She’s fun. She doesn’t have to be a man wearing lipstick.
Ashoka Tano is one of the most beloved Star Wars characters at this point. She was original. She had her own backstory and personality, not something shoved onto her by a previous male Ahsoka.
Stop. Changing. Character. Genders. It’s really dumb and gimmicky, as well as disrespectful and lacking in any creativity and tact.
male feminists are part of the oppressor class and are ultimately agents of patriarchy and no context can release them from this. the usual answer is for them to cease being feminists, as then at least their being agents of patriarchy will be consistent. this is not to my preference; male feminists and male Feminist Allies are prone to the same horseshit and are still fundamentally male either way. the only resolution to this position is abandoning maleness.
Remember that post I did a few weeks ago about sci-fi being a man’s world? This video is, in effect, the living illustration of that.
As this video demonstrates, there are precisely three female speaking parts other than Leia in the three original trilogy Star Wars films: Aunt Beru, a female rebel communications officer, and Mon Mothma. While you could be a pedant and say that Oola and Sy Snootles (bit parts in Return of the Jedi) are other female speaking parts, Oola’s lines consist of barely audible pleading (followed by some dying screams) while Sy Snootles is only ever heard singing (and is, perhaps more pertinently, a puppet). Semantics aside, it’s undeniable - the original trilogy pretty much presents a universe with a single female character of any significance.
While this seems obvious to me (and, I would hope, any other reasonable person), this video has enraged many, many people. The like/dislike ratio is presently 356/786, and the comments section includes gems such as:
“[Women not talking much is] probably one of the reasons they were such great movies.“
“The female lead was completely removed to make this video possible. Leia has more lines than Han Solo. Also, these are war movies and women don’t fight in wars. Look at Saving Private Ryan, Platoon, Apocalypse Now, etc and same thing. If women want more lines in war movies, fight in some wars.“
“More bullshit feminist propaganda.“
Since your average YouTube comments section is a rancid pit of small-mindedness, bigotry and general stupidity, none of these comments should be remotely surprising. Nonetheless, the fact that a video like this - which passes no comment or judgement, simply highlighting the minimal role women other than Leia play in the OT - provokes such extreme defensiveness and misogyny is quite fascinating. People are adverse to and paranoid about anything that could be construed as an attack against Star Wars, and this video is perceived as a particularly sinister threat since it’s taken as an attack against the franchise as a male preserve.
In the comments, there are endless arguments justifying the exclusion of women from the original trilogy - these range from the sensible (it’s symptomatic of the general view that sci-fi/action films are a male domain, which was especially dominant in the 1970s), to the questionable (it’s because the Star Wars films are war movies, and women don’t fight in wars), to the outright misogynistic (it’s because women don’t like sci-fi, so why should sci-fi films feature them at all?)
While there are reasons - rooted in the context in which Star Wars was produced - why the original trilogy is so male dominated, there is nothing fundamentally male about the story of Star Wars. It’s far more a fairy-tale than a war movie, and George Lucas actually envisaged the protagonist as a young girl during the film’s early development. Perhaps most importantly, Star Wars is set in a fantasy version of space, a landscape populated by myriad species and diverse characters. In a world such as this, there is absolutely no reason why there should only be a single female character with any presence or importance to the plot. Women are 50% of the population of Earth. There is no reason why they should only constitute 2% of the population of space.
Jupiter Ascending recognises and exploits this to the max, presenting a universe populated by a whole range of colourful and distinctive characters, male and female. Its female characters include a young Russo-Anglo immigrant living in Chicago, an alien heiress, a badass space captain, a canny personal assistant with deer ears, a well-intentioned rich girl, and a bitter and disillusioned mother. All of these characters are named and afforded genuine and distinctive personalities, and none of them are defined exclusively in relation to men - they are their own people, and their feelings, choices and personalities are respected and acknowledged. In Jupiter Ascending, the fabric of the universe is shaped by women - this is reflected in almost every aspect of the film, from its female-dominated mythology to its stress on imagery and aesthetics associated with femininity and maternity. This all coalesces to form a cinematic vision of space quite unlike anything seen before, and the inherent strangeness of it is, I feel, a big part of why Jupiter Ascending was so roundly rejected.
Nonetheless, the sands are shifting. Rey is absolutely the lead of Star Wars: The Force Awakens, and while that film doesn’t have the same breadth and diversity of female characters as Jupiter Ascending we’ve already heard that it passes the Bechdel test and presents a scenario never witnessed in the original trilogy - two women talking to each other. While something that simple shouldn’t need to be seen as a sign of progress in 2015, it absolutely is a sign of progress and we should all hope that things only improve from here.
While intending the opposite, some feminists have encouraged and participated in this type of analysis by conceiving rape as violence, not sex. (18) While this approach gave needed emphasis to rape’s previously effaced elements of power and dominance, it obscured its elements of sex. Aside from failing to answer the rather obvious question – if it is violence not sex, why didn’t he just hit her? – this approach made it impossible to see that violence is sex when it is practiced as sex. (19) This is obvious once what sexuality is, is understood as a matter of what it means and how it is interpreted.
To say rape is violence not sex preserves the “sex is good” norm by simply distinguishing forced sex as “not sex,” whether it means sex to the perpetrator or even, later, to the victim, who has difficulty experiencing sex without reexperiencing the rape. Whatever is sex cannot be violent; whatever is violent cannot be sex. This analytic wish-fulfillment makes it possible for rape to be opposed by those who would save sexuality from the rapists while leaving the sexual fundamentals of male dominance intact. (pp. 134-5)