making pierogi

I am laughing here so much over Eliza Minnick’s “jak posmakujesz moje pierogi to nie będziesz chciała innych” [transl. once you taste my pierogi (Polish dumplings) you won’t want to eat any other] because - and I don’t know if it was intentional - it can be read as word play related to cunnilingus.

okay, so singular form of “pierogi” is “pieróg”; and a diminutive form of “pieróg” - “pierożek” - is one of many Polish euphemisms for female genitalia. 

2015

“Where are you going now, Yuri?” Viktor asks, because practice is over and his brain can focus on other things like 1) the hole in his sleeve 2) the impressive gap in Yakov’s eyebrow that he does not want to know about and 3) chitchat with rinkmates.

“I’m going to try this new club,” Georgi announces, like nobody knows he’s just seen his ex check in there. “Seems cool.”

Viktor smiles politely and turns back to Yuri, who has just graduated from juniors. “How about you?”

Yuri gives him this look. The one you give to an adult when they ask how to print an email attachment.

“Seeing my grandpa,” he says. “It’s Sunday. We’re making pierogi.”

This is the most Yuri has ever said to Viktor, and he seems to have exhausted his reserves. Viktor’s follow up questions are all met with irritable shrugs.

2016

Sometimes Viktor says he’s going out but stays in. Sometimes Viktor says he’s staying in to do laundry when he is 100% planning to try out that new bar the next block over.

He doesn’t know why he does this. 

Keep reading

Some thoughts on tonight's game, in no apparent order and not particularly coherent :

• holy shit pierogi nachos?!?!

• BONINOBONINOBONINOBONINO

• FLOWER what even ARE YOU?

• pierogi nachos?!?!?!

• you think they’re going to review that goal for a distinct kicking motion? *cackles*

• well, i chugged that glass of wine

• NO SeRiouSly, PIEROGI NACHOS??

• how are you even REAL? HOW???? HOW FLOWER?!

• i don’t think that guentzel is cherubic; his face is too narrow. olli is cherubic. guentzel is more…. elfin.

• they must use the small pierogi to make those

• i can’t even, flower

• i also can’t continue knitting

• maybe a little less hair gel, jay caulfield

• sheary is a little ball of rage, you check him and he just bristles like a tiny feral cat. guentzel just looks at you with his big blue eyes and you feel shame for trying to hurt him.

• i need the pierogi nachos

• oh god oh god overtime I fucking hate overtime

• FLOWER FLOWER FLOWER YOU ARE AMAZING HOW DID YOU EVEN STOP THAT SHOT????

• pierogi nachos….they look so good

• I HATE SHOOTOUTS

• CAPTAIN CANADA WILL SCORE A GOAL

• CAPTAIN CANADA HAS SCORED A GOAL

• PHIL. PHIL THE THRILL KESSEL. PHILIP THRILL UP KESSEL.

• flower you won that game for us, you deserve all the nice things. like kittens and puppies and pierogi nachos and blow jobs.

• HOW IS FLOWER *NOT* THE FIRST STAR????? BLASPHEMY

• but seriously, pierogi nachos

There are those days...

Where you wake up… and, out of nowhere, you have shit tons of energy, motivation, and desire to get things done…

Today was that day for me…

Seriously… Whole apartment clean, all laundry washed and PUT AWAY!

Now I’m working in my kitchen making three different types of Pierogi so I have lunch/dinner for the week…

I’m probably going to regret this tomorrow… but, for today, I’m going to just ride this wave and get things done.

Plus… Pierogi… Noms. That’s motivation enough to keep going…

mashkov - 1, zimmermann - 8

Welcome back to the Falconers Faceoff! We’re back with your host and favorite Russian player in all of NHL, Alexei Mashkov!

Alexei: Hello, hello! It is so nice being here! Today will be good day because I have great idea for beating our contestant today. Say hello again to Zimmboni!

Zimm…boni: Hi, Tater. Hello, all. Glad to be here.

…Tater!: Haha, Zimmboni not speak much, but he does a lot. But I know his girl make very good food, so I thinking Zimmboni not good at cooking!

Zimmboni: …you could say that, ha.

Tater: So today we have friendly competition, yeah? We do cooking competition! Woo!

**2 hours later**

Tater: Mama Mashkova very good at making pierogi. My favorite is potato, so I make potato! What you make, Zimmboni?

Zimmboni: I made mini-pies. With apple?

Tater: Ah, so cute! Looks pretty, like you. 

Zimmboni: Uh, thanks? Your dumplings look…like you, too? (stares at neat, pleated ruffles at the edges)

Tater: –but how it taste? I try. You try mine, Zimmboni!

Zimmboni: …

Tater: …

Zimmboni: It’s, uh, good. Nice and…salty. Lots of potato. Actually just like salty potato.

Tater: This mini-pie making me cry! The apple is soft and lots of cinnamon. Zimmboni, why you not telling me you cook good?? When are we meeting your girl???

Zimmboni: Uh, well–

Guy: Hey. Is that apple pie I smell? I’m starving. (swipes a mini-pie)

Guy: …Jesus, this is beautiful. HEY YOU GUYS…

Marty and Thirdy: We smelled food?

Poots: Dude, Snowy could smell the stuff all the way form the trainer’s room. Let’s have some.

**45 minutes later**

Nutritionist: What are you guys doing eating POTATOES AND PIE?????

5

THIS WAS MY ADVENTURE OF A LIFETIME!!!! I was in a hotel NEXT TOO mars hotel (and we didn’t know that they will be in that hotel! What a SURPRISE!!) met them few Times in the city, AND I WAS EATING PIEROGI WITH TOMO IN THE SAME RESTAURANT! HE came to US to ask us If they have good food!!! Jared said to me “Thank you, baby” at the m&g in HIS sexxxxy voice and Shannon was LOOKING at me all the time at the m&g and he choose me from so so so many people for the last question! And than jared started to laughing that he will give me the video Which i was asking about after i’ll make HIm pierogi!!! Still waiting for my m&g PICTURE but JFC What a trip!!!