what happened after magnus poured his heart out to alec?
this takes place after the hug in 2x15:
just some fluff to soothe our angst filled hearts…
(legit gasped very quietly in the middle of a lecture when i thought of this and quickly typed out an outline to write later lmao)
“There is nothing ugly about you,” said Alec, his fingers burning into the side of Magnus’ neck. Magnus felt a wave of relief wash over him and let out a breath as Alec brought him in for a tight hug. Magnus immediately clasped his hands around Alec’s torso, almost as though he was scared that if he let go Alec would leave.
He felt Alec’s chin against his shoulder and couldn’t help but bury his own face into the crook of his neck. Magnus breathed in, breathed every bit of Alec in and refused to breathe out. It just felt so warm and nice near the nape of Alec’s neck and Magnus knew that he was in way too deep.
Pulling away, Magnus felt a shiver down his spine at the loss of Alec’s body against his. He looked at the boy, at his hazel eyes and their openness, but looked away. He let out a huff of a laugh which earned a confused frown from Alec. “Oh, God,” Magnus exclaimed, still avoiding looking at anything to do with Alec.
“What is it?” asked Alec and Magnus’ heart ached at the boy’s anxious tone.
Magnus looked back up and he could feel his eyes well with tears. They were so close that Magnus could almost hear Alec’s heartbeat quicken. Magnus blinked, trying to stop the tears from falling but failed miserably as one slipped through. “I love you so much it hurts,” said Magnus in a shaky whisper. Alec’s confused expression slipped into a look of utter despair as he moved his finger to wipe the tear from Magnus’ face.
He didn’t know what to think, let alone say. It hurt? Was that a good thing? Loving wasn’t supposed to hurt, it was supposed to be the easiest thing in the world. At least, that was what Alec had read about in so many novels. That was what he had understood. But love was complicated, he knew that. He knew that his parents didn’t have it easy and he remembered the way it seemed impossible before he came out.
But it was supposed to be easy with the right one. It was supposed to feel good, it wasn’t supposed to hurt. Alec choked back a tear of his own before speaking. “Why does it hurt?” he said, barely louder than a whisper.
Magnus looked at him with a soft smile, and suddenly Alec felt a clenching feeling in his chest and he understood. He remembered feeling this way for hours before finally finding Magnus after Valentine’s attack. “Because it’s you,” Magnus said and Alec felt like he would pass out. He didn’t understand what Magnus had meant by it hurting until now.
He looked at Magnus with so much sadness that for a second, Magnus forgot his glamour, letting it slip. His cat eyes shone brightly and Alec’s expression didn’t change. Magnus had not expected for it to change, but part of him hoped that it did so that it wouldn’t hurt so much later. Once Magnus realised just what he was showing Alec, he looked away and blinked rapidly to bring his glamour back up. He settled for staring at his own hands in his lap if it meant he didn’t have to see Alec’s pained expression.
Alec reached a hand out and placed it in Magnus. “Hey,” he whispered, stroking his thumb against Magnus’ rings. “It’s okay. I love your eyes.” The sound of Alec’s raspy whisper sent shivers throughout Magnus’ entire body. Magnus smiled, not being able to believe that he actually had someone like Alec in his life. Quickly, Magnus wiped his face, drying them of tears and ran a hand under his eyes as well.
“Now,” said Magnus, trying his best to sit upright. “I’m guessing you’re gonna need a Warlock to transport Valentine to Idris.”
Alec’s lips parted. He couldn’t let Magnus do this, not now, not like this. “Yeah… I was thinking of asking Catarina,” he replied, hoping Magnus would agree. Magnus took note of the way Alec said ‘ask’ and not ‘use’. So many Shadowhunters he had met assumed that Downworlders would be at their service whenever they needed. “You know, considering…” Alec trailed off and Magnus raised an eyebrow with a smirk.
“Considering…?” questioned Magnus. Alec avoided looking at Magnus, knowing that if he did, he would lose. He had already lost. “Alexander, I’ll be fine. I promise,” said Magnus and Alec looked up with a look of uncertainty.
“Are you sure?” he asked, softly. Magnus nodded reassuringly, his hand squeezing Alec’s.
Alec squeezed back. “I’ll be right beside you,” he whispered. Magnus smiled and nodded.
“Let me grab my jacket,” he said before getting up and moving towards the bedroom. Alec moved to let Magnus pass and took a seat on the sofa. He took note of the numerous empty liquor bottles and his chest ached again. Yes, he definitely understood what Magnus was talking about. He waited for a few minutes but when Magnus didn’t come back out, he decided to follow him into his room.
Alec stopped at the doorway, leaning against the threshold. He watched as Magnus stood in front of the mirror, hands pulling at the collar of his shirt and jacket. Magnus was fidgeting, adjusting his necklaces in a way that looked like he was stalling.
Alec noticed the way the jacket clung to Magnus’ form, emphasising his muscles and arms in a way that made Alec weak. He had to swallow hard and look away to stay collected. “You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” spoke Alec and Magnus flinched lightly in surprise.
Magnus scoffed, looking down at his fingernails. “Believe me, I do.” Magnus wanted nothing more than to hand Valentine over to the Clave. After everything he had done…
Magnus snapped the memory out of his mind and sighed. He turned around to lean against the dresser and face Alec. He was hunched over a little and had a look of uncertainty on his face. He was still fidgeting with the sleeves of his jacket and pulling at his collar. He looked uncomfortable and Alec couldn’t tell if it was in his jacket or his own skin.
“Hey,” said Alec, standing straight and taking a step closer. “You look great,” he whispered. Magnus dropped his hands with a deep sigh and a soft smile, Alec’s wide grin calming him down instantly.
i hope you enjoyed, let me know what you think! if you have any prompts or scenarios for me, please head over to my ask box.
in the meantime, how that dinner should continue if not for that impending fight.