magical rap battles

voiddwellerstudios  asked:

Here's my rap: My name is Ruby and although I'm a nerd You better believe my rap gon be heard If you diss my main man Jace, You best believe I'll get up in your face I'm kinda weird and I'm kinda gay But to be honest I wouldn't have it any other way I'll beat ur ass at a game of mtg You won't win a game of modern against me You can bet your cards and you can bet your soul, But you won't beat my best deck; izzet control

Hey Ruby, it’s Ben. Jace is truly the best
Except his sense of fashion, can’t say that I’m impressed
If you really pressed me, put me in a stress-test
I confess he may be brilliant, but he’s never well-dressed!

Weird and gay? Please, of course you’re welcome at my table
That’s why it’s called The Gathering, we welcome all labels
But Modern? And Izzet? Control? Seems bleak
When you could Always Be Commanderin’, like my pal Rafiq

Or Glissa, Niv Mizza, Ruric-Thar, or Shu Yun
That’s what happens when you fight me - this battle is done!

anonymous asked:

I can't think of a land for the knight of rage, do you have any suggestions?

Since I don’t know your character, not really. Time to hijack this ask as well. (picture by striderswag.)

There were actually two Rage playtest charcters. René Sloan (above, from a solo game), the Knight of Rage, hero of the Land of Rings and Fanfare (he’s a boxer, in case it’s hard to tell) - and Nelens Serana, the Thief of Rage, hero of Land of Fabric and Feelings. Nelens’ Ancestor was heavily implied to be the Seer of Rage.

Canonically, we see only one Rage planet, the Land of Tents and Mirth, which belongs to Gamzee Makara. It is almost certainly personalized for him and less directly related to the Rage Aspect.

Rage (in GTRPG, at least) is the Aspect of negative emotions. So some good words for it would be:

Aggression, Anxiety, Arrogance, Antagonism, Bitterness, Cruelty, Delusion, Depression, Ego, Envy, Fear, Greed, Hatred, Hopelessness, Ignorance, Impatience, Impulse, Insecurity, Irritation, Isolation, Jealousy, Lust, Madness, Misery, Panic, Paranoia, Rage, Recklessness, Regret, Ridicule, Sadness, Shame, Sloth, Tantrums, Vanity, Villainy, Zealotry

However, some people feel Rage is the Aspect of all passion and emotions. So here’s something for that:

Acceptance, Admiration, Apologies, Balance, Beauty, Bravery, Calm, Cheer, Clarity, Comfort, Cooperation, Courage, Daring, Dignity, Discipline, Duty, Elation, Elegance, Energy, Euphoria, Excitement, Faith, Flow, Focus, Forgiveness, Heroism, Honesty, Hope, Kindness, Love, Mercy, Patience, Passion, Serenity, Spirit, Temperance, Thrills

If you associate violence or war with the Rage Aspect:

Barrages, Battles, Bloodshed, Bloodthrist, Bombardments, Brutality, Enmity, Cannons, Carnage, Clashes, Crusades, Combat, Competition, Conflict, Contention, Fervor, Fire, Fray, Havoc, Heroics, Hostility, Gladiators, Gunpowder, Murder, Power, Onslaughts, Quarrels, Rebellions, Revenge, Strife, Struggle, Violence, War, Warfare, Weapons, Wrath

If you associate chaos or unpredictability with the Rage Aspect:

Anarchy, Accidents, Ataxia, Bedlam, Chaos, Chimeras, Clamor, Clutter, Confusion, Disarray, Discord, Disorder, Distractions, Dreams, Furor, Haze, Limbo, Imagination, Maelstroms, Misrule, Oddities, Pandemonium, Randomness, Riots, Serendipity, Tumult, Turmoil, Unpredictability, Unrest, Upheaval 

If you just like badass things here is a 100% accurate list of badass things:

Bandanas, Books, Boxing, Canada, Dragons, Dinosaurs, Driving, Dueling, Explosions, Fast Cars, Fireworks, Flamethrowers, Hawks, Honey Badgers, High-Fives, Hippos, Kayaking, Large Dogs, Lacrosse, Lava, Luchadors, Magic, Ninjas, Ninja Swords, Rap Battles, Racing, Scars, Selfies, Sharks, Shurikens, Skeletons, Swearing, Swords, Tigers, Wizards, Wrestling, Zombies

If you see something that works, you can just pick some words out of that list. Alternatively, use this site. I just did, and got Land of Magnets and Bone (LOMAB) for you.

So this happened today
  • Friend: Hey, have you watched all Harry Potter movies?
  • Me inside: What? Are you for real? Have I watched all Harry Potter movies???? Pffft. Dude, I've read all books too, and I've listened to their audiobooks. I have read every fanfiction there is about my otp. I have thought about these characters countless times for years. I have ogled at every fanart, listened to every kind of music; rap battles, magic bands and shit. I have been active on every Harry Potter fan site there is. I have spent sleepless nights in the anticipation of the movies. I have stalked Wikipedias of all movies stars. I used to say "Wingardium Leviosa" using my spoon without even noticing! There is no HP quiz that I can't ace. There is nothing about the books and the movies that I don't know about. Buddy, I used to practically breathe Harry Potter. I have not just "watched all movies".
  • Me outside: Yeah, what about them?
Rap Battle: Yami Yuugi vs. Ash Ketchum
Rap Battle: Yami Yuugi vs. Ash Ketchum

look what I just did

(beat is from here)

this is for antique-symbolism

Ash Ketchum:

Hey, Dexter, say, ya wanna try to explain

why this guy thinks he’s good enough to take my flames?

‘Cuz you know me and Pikachu are comin’ to serve!

I’ve perfected my swerve to hit you right in the nerve!

You may be a master gamer but you couldn’t be lamer!

Your playin’ cards ain’t impressin’ to a Pokemon trainer!

You live in the body of a teenage boy!

I’ll use my POUND on your ass like I do to Nurse Joy!

And what’s with the cards? That your only trick?

You got your name on the game, it’s like you’re suckin’ your own DECK!

I’m goin’ strong all along, ‘cuz I’m the hero

You shoulda given up after Season Zero!

My show has me in the light.  Meowth, that’s right!

Your little spinoffs can’t put up a fight!

Go back to Egypt and lie back in your crypt!

At least you’ll save your reputation—that’s a TRAINER TIP!

Yami Yuugi:

Oh, that’s RICH comin’ from a boy who can’t even win

against the Elite Four in the first show that he’s in!

You know I’m thinkin’ that just maybe Team Rocket was right!

You ain’t nothin’ but a brat with a rat-shaped flashlight!

I’m bringin’ rhymes from the sands of time

and all my friends and my priests know the game is mine!

I got a writer who followed my story through to the end!

But you got eighteen seasons and you’re still—what, ten?!

Even your games are fallin’ back to Hoenn!

And yet there’s still not a single one that you’re even in!

Now pay close attention to the beats I’m layin’

GOTTA CATCH ‘EM ALL if you wanna be playin’

with the master of past or present games of all kinds. 

You step to me?  I’m gonna CRUSH your MIND!  

I got the skills and the brains and I’m bringin’ the pain

So suck my Dark Magic, bitch, and take your Penalty Game!

Ash Ketchum:  

You know, you act so tough, and hey, maybe you are!

But we know it’s just a cover for the weaker star-head!

What kind of attack can your monsters pack

when they’ve each only got one and static stats?

I’m raisin’ levels above without a single Rare Candy!

Like Abra and Kadabra magic, beats so dandy!

Your rhymes are just a cheap Ditto of mine

So go and cry me a river that’s as big as the Rhine!

Yami Yuugi:

It’s the Nile that’s in Egypt, you ass.

Maybe ‘stead of Poke-ventures you should go back to class.

And I’ll show you real magic from my Dark Magician

with a blast from the past that’ll leave you wishin’

you had never challenged me to any kind of duel!

Thought you’d try and be cool but you’re playin’ the fool!

I’ll take your little punk ass back to Palette

Leave you wishin’ for mercy with my Magical Mallet!

Unappreciated Tribes

Everyone please join in with your favorite unappreciated tribes in Magic! The more the merrier! flavoracle, drake-edh, uffdathegreat, tibalt-the-fiend-blooded, bace-jelerentijmenndg, sarkhan-volkswagen, chandra-nalaar, ant-tessitore and anyone else!

Y’all have heard of Merfolk and of Goblins and of Elves,
It’s the forgotten tribes’ time to shine, we may not gel
But we’re here to represent, though we don’t work together well
We’ll snipe bigger creature types: we’re here to raise some hell!

We the rats (we bring the plague!) yeah we so relentless
Leave you defenseless
If good neighbors make good fences,
Then we the baddest swarm of pests that leaves you feelin’ septic
Gnawing on you merrow while our ogre buddies wreck this!

Ooze the greatest now? Why you goblins think you’re funnier
than us is just revolting. Although we may be runnier
we never flee from battle cause our foes we will devour
It seems your chiefs have marched you straight into your final hour!

We can take the elves from here, our bodies bigger
Hooves that stamp and trample you, survival of the fitter
Centaurs don’t relent with our bodies human/horse-er
We’ll demean you weenies so green, beat you of courser!

I think you all are getting the point, we fly our freak flag
Proud of who we are because we know that we got real swag
Our fearless leader gets mad respect, don’t need no name tag
So bow to me and pay up to the world’s greatest Brushwagg!