madea-movies

russianspacegeckosexparty  asked:

Think about Biracial!Steve "catching up on" all the things he's missed, including modern pop culture, namely black culture with Sam's help. The truth is he's a big nerd who's loving every second of immersing himself. "Which one is Felicia?" "Quick question: Why does the black character ALWAYS die?" "Why is Tyler Perry allowed to make movies? I didn't die for this"

Okay but we have to expand on the Tyler Perry thing because I fucking hate him with a passion. We have to talk about how one of the first black movies Steve saw when fresh out of the ice, was a Madea movie and how he was literally disgusted with the entire ordeal. While watching this black man, clown older black women he just kept thinking back to the older black women from back in his day that accepted him when no one else did, all of his mother’s friends were black women, aside from Bucky’s mother. They were all fat, black women, opinionated and wonderful, brave black women whose wisdom never went unnoticed and he cherished them. So fast forward 70 years, he’s sitting with a laptop he’s taught himself how to use, still reflecting on the Battle of New York in a box apartment in Brooklyn, watching this train wreck and fuming

He can’t believe this something being praised and he’s beyond pissed and from then on every time someone mentions Tyler Perry he gets the nastiest side eye. On another note, his favorite era of entertainment is of course the 90s. He glares at white people wearing t-shirts that say, “Bye Felicia.” and basically lives in Sam’s music room, yes he has a music room full of cassettes, CDs, vinyls and more, and immerses himself in old school hip hop and r&b. And because he’s not a purest he also dabbles in a lot of new stuff, he’s a Nicki stan. When Anaconda gets released he’s the first one on instagram rapping along to the lyrics while driving, the video goes viral. He thinks a lot of new music is fun, he’s happy about seeing more black faces being even more creative. He publicly bitches about the tired trope of black people dying in horror movies or getting gross stereotypical roles and was quoted saying, “Well damn, we might as well not be there if we’re dying in 20 minutes.”, that was his review for basically every horror movie ever made. He’s a fan of memes, has made memes of himself, loves all things pop culture because he feels like he has a chance to be present now. He’s here, he’s involved in the world in more ways than just surviving or being used as a prop or being shot at, and he loves it.

anonymous asked:

Why do black movies focus so much on black women not finding a man because of her education ? Why do the black women always end up with hoodbooger drug dealer who wants to go clean? What about non black doctor or dude with old long money

Because motherfuckers don’t want to see us happy…

Nah, but really it’s because that’s what sells sadly, and that’s the narrative that people associate with black women. The struggle loving, emotionally drained, verbally and psychologically abused mammying handmaiden that accepts whatever she can get because she’s lonely and just wants any ole black kang to love.

Also because that’s the narrative that makes nonblacks comfortable. No one can fuck with a well taken care of black woman. When a black woman is upwardly mobile, beautiful, educated, fit, and mentally sound, she illuminates any room that’s blessed enough to have her in it. But this makes nonblacks (especially the women) extremely uncomfortable. So it’s easier to show black women in a negative light and profit off of our degradation (because that’s what mofos love to see), than it is for people to actually stop being lazy and make movies that show black women winning at life.

I’d personally love to see movies about black women dating outside of their race and succeeding at it. I’d love to see black women in movies like the Notebook. I want to see movies with a black female version of Zsa Zsa Gabor. But will we support it… That’s the question. Or are we just going to ignore it and run to the movie theater when Tyler Perry comes out with yet another Madea movie or when Lee Daniels bastardizes our experience as black women and profits off of it like he did with Precious?

craig and those guys

you guessed it, more hcs


-ok so ive seen a lot of posts where craigs gang is mostly tweek, craig, and clyde but im here to tell you that jimmy, token, and occasionally kevin is part of the group too

-token throws the best parties ever! theyre not ridiculous and crazy but theyre still fun and relatively small and everyone has fun

-clyde and jimmy write jokes together!! craig always calls the jokes lame but he actually thinks some of them are pretty good

-token being the mom friend is so fake,, hes probably made clyde cry more than anyone else (not that its that hard to do)

-one time token had them all watch a madea movie, he couldnt stop laughing. everyone else was either sleeping or on their phones

-at one of their sleepovers, token and craig dared clyde to shave his legs and ever since he did the dare, clyde regularly shaves

-every halloween, jimmy clyde and craig always plan their costumes to match

-they have a movie night every friday and alternate whos house its at

-jimmy and token like comedies, clyde likes rom coms and action movies, craig likes sci-fi and often invites kevin over when they watch anything sci-fi, and tweek likes documentaries and musicals

-token and tweek are theater hoes.. craig and clyde try their hardest to get tickets to different plays

-token and tweek are in the drama club!! token does work behind the scenes and tweek loves to be on stage! jimmy also usually helps out the drama club with scripts and ideas! clyde, craig, and kevin are always there supporting their friends and the club!

-everyone makes sure to jimmy’s open mic night performances! they love seeing how happy he gets with he gets a good reaction from the crowd!

-token and jimmy are the band kids. they have band camp stories and everything. clyde and craig are also in band but not as into it as the other two are

-tweek always manages to get the drama club to work with the band so he can hang out with his friends more

-the boys all help tweek with his cramps in different ways! token probably has an older sister and always has ibuprofen ready, knowing just how bad cramps can get. craig keeps a heating pad at his house for when the cramps get too bad! he also makes sure the snuggle with his bf. clyde and jimmy usually gets tweek chocolates! they also just hang out with him to distract him from possible dysphoria 

-basically theyre a bunch of nerds who support each other and also love to do stupid stuff together


guera!! bratterrs!! glubs!! hope its ok to tag u guys!!

My First Sexual Encounter with a Hood Nigga

I had a hood nigga one time come to my place. He walked there on a mid summer 95°+ day (he lived 2blocks away so he decided not to drive). He walked there wearing those pants with the velcro (Jabos), some Tims and a long sleeve black thermo. At that moment I should have known. I should have known to walk back inside and pretend I never met him.

When he got to my place he was dripping in sweat carrying a black book bag up on his back. We get into my place and we settled in. He pulls a Madea Movie out of his book bag and says, “This is my favorite movie yo!” And I laughed internally as he goes over to my DVD player and turns it on.

We stopped watching the movie a few minutes in because we were preoccupied with each other. Eventually we got to undressing one another. In the middle of him undressing me he stops and gets up. Starts reaching in his bag and begins pulling items out one by one and nicely lining them up on my dresser.

He starts with a jar of Coco Butter, then follows with a condom, then a silver pocket rocket, next some petroleum jelly, oh and a Q-Tip! I almost forgot the Q-Tip.

I’m thinking to myself, “ooo a massage! I’d like a massage but with some nice fragrant oils not some damn coco butter.” Little did I know the coco butter wasn’t even for me so I humbled myself rather quickly.

He uncaps the coco butter and gets a handful and starts stroking his dick with it. Never seen no shit like this so I watched in amazement. Then he grabs the Vaseline gets his Q-Tip and scoops out some, and rubs it all around the head of his penis.
He then proceeds to put his condom on all while I’m staring at him in disbelief.

He takes off the remainder of his clothes and folds them up and places them neatly on my chair. He comes back over to me still in his Tims and wifebeater and lays me down, and takes off his shirt. Covers my face with it and upon contact with my face I then remember he just walked here dripping wet in blazing 95° midday southern summer heat. “Hold on”, he tells me. “I’ve got a surprise for you.” I’m like, “if its that dick I want no part of it.”

A few seconds later he comes back over to me and parts my legs and rubs my thighs. Then I feel something slide up inside. I was like, “is that a finger?” Lying there perplexed, eyes covered with his t-shirt dripping in sweat. Still trying to identify what the hell could possibly be up inside of me. Then it dawned on me. That damn pocket rocket no Vaseline.

That’s when I was done. Completely over it! Let’s just say we did not have sexual relations that day or ever. However, we did finish watching ma to the damn dea on opposite sides of the bed.

anonymous asked:

hii💕💕💕💕what are your top 5 fav songs ?? and fav movies?? lov ur blog btw

Hi!! This is difficult..I would have to say my top 5 fav songs would be: 1)Wake Me Up by Avicci, 2) What’s Your Name? by Lynyrd Skynyrd, 3) Yellow Submarine by The Beatles, 4) Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morrison, 5) El Dorado by EXO! 

Then my favorite movies would be 1) Sharknado, 2) The Spongebob Movie, 3) Madea movies, 4) Young Frankenstein, 5) Monsters Inc. 

Quite an interesting combination on both lists, but I was exposed to all kinds of crazy music and a lot of movies growing up! I’m so happy you’re loving the blog and continue to cheer us on! Lots of love <3

~Admin Sam   

The 5 Whypipo...

…who call you their “black friend.”

1. Your low-key racist coworker that loves Madea movies and who likes to touch your hair.

Originally posted by leiacroft

2. The one you’ve known since elementary school that posts anti-Obama memes on Facebook.

Originally posted by jessepnkman

3. The one who makes it a little too clear he’s “down with the swirl.”

Originally posted by revolttv

4. The hella woke one just begging for an invite to the barbeque that you have to resist giving too many cookies.

Originally posted by comedycentral


5. The less woke one that likes your #blacklivesmatter posts but would never post that shit on their own wall.  (The same person who just watched Roots for the first time, and wants to “unpack” it with you.)

Originally posted by lovefortelevision

youtube

Boo! A Madea Halloween (2016 Movie – Tyler Perry) Official Trailer – ‘Trick Or Treat’

Found this beautiful poem called "In and Out of Time"

The sun has come.
The mist has gone.
We see in the distance…
our long way home.
I was always yours to have.
You were always mine.
We have loved each other in and out of time.
When the first stone looked up at the blazing sun
and the first tree struggled up from the forest floor
I had always loved you more.
You freed your braids…
gave your hair to the breeze.
It hummed like a hive of honey bees.
I reached in the mass for the sweet honey comb there….
Mmmm…God how I love your hair.
You saw me bludgeoned by circumstance.
Lost, injured, hurt by chance.
I screamed to the heavens….loudly screamed….
Trying to change our nightmares to dreams…
The sun has come.
The mist has gone.
We see in the distance our long way home.
I was always yours to have.
You were always mine.
We have loved each other in and out
in and out
in and out
of time.

anonymous asked:

As a writer, you should seperate your personal life from what you are writing. You saying you can't write about spider-ham because he is Jewish is like Tyler Perry not writing Madea movies because it is a joke of his own race

I’m mixed and both my roommates are white. They’re sisters. I overheard this conversation tonight while they were trying to decide what to watch on Netflix.

Sister 1: Ooo a Madea movie! Wanna watch it?
Sister 2: I don’t really like Tyler Perry’s stuff.
1: Why?
2: It’s racist. There aren’t any white people in it. If there’s a movie with no black people in it, it’s super racist and everyone freaks out, but movies without white people in them are okay.
1: Yeah but the black people in our movies always die first so it’s okay.

I’ve known about their racism for a long time and can’t move out right now for a few reasons. This is just one of the many things they’ve said/done.



Can we start you a gofundme account?? I’d much rather you move out than have to deal with a racist Mary Kate & Ashley.