made these for my robert character


// A R S   P A R A D O X I C A

major characters ; dr sally grissom - anthony partridge - chet whickman - esther roberts

anonymous asked:

Why do you think Robert wanted to marry Lyanna? Was she the most beautiful women he had ever see, did he enjoy her fire or did he wanna marry her so him and Ned would be brothers?

Oh, banish the thought that Robert wanted Lyanna because of her fire. Robert didn’t know Lyanna to appreciate anything about her beyond the superficial. He demonstrates, time and again, how utterly ignorant he is of who Lyanna was as a person, something that Ned calls him out on when he tries to claim that Lyanna wouldn’t have objected to him fighting in the melee or shamed him like Cersei does. Which might be the funniest thing I’ve ever heard from Robert Baratheon, because:

“You never knew Lyanna as I did, Robert,” Ned told him. “You saw her beauty, but not the iron underneath. She would have told you that you have no business in the melee.”

Lyanna totally would have shamed Robert like that and worse, because Robert’s ideal woman is one that looks pretty and keeps her mouth shut while he does whatever the hell he wants, and that’s not Lyanna Stark. Lyanna’s fire would have driven Robert nuts because it does not fit his idea of what a woman should be like, much less his own wife. The man takes Cersei’s (justified and correct) objection to him fighting in the melee as a personal insult and is utterly flabbergasted that Ned not only agrees with her, but is sure that Lyanna would have done the same. Because the Lyanna in Robert’s head would never. He didn’t see her fire any more than he saw her; he only saw what he projected on her, and that made her his ideal woman and his One True Love.

No, anon, it was largely about Ned who is the brother Robert wants, not his disappointing blood brothers. The Starks are also an excellent family for Robert to marry into - very prestigious with a history that is as long as man has been in the North, former kings with the largest domain in all of the Seven Kingdoms, and more importantly (to Robert, at least), a close-knit family that genuinely likes and respects one another. Ned left Winterfell when he was eight but he still managed to have a close relationship with his siblings, while Robert spent years with only sullen disappointing Stannis for company and baby Renly isn’t much of an improvement. Robert grew attached to the idea of being part of the Starks that he still seeks to make it happen years later by betrothing Joffrey to Sansa. We also see evidence of this in his consuming anger when Ned speaks against sending someone to kill Daenerys.

“Unspeakable?” the king roared. “What Aerys did to your brother Brandon was unspeakable. The way your lord father died, that was unspeakable. And Rhaegar… how many times do you think he raped your sister? How many hundreds of times?” His voice had grown so loud that his horse whinnied nervously beneath him. The king jerked the reins hard, quieting the animal, and pointed an angry finger at Ned. “I will kill every Targaryen I can get my hands on, until they are as dead as their dragons, and then I will piss on their graves.”

He does not only speak of Lyanna but of Brandom and Rickard as well. He is screaming the atrocities that were done to the Starks at Ned as if they did not happen to Ned’s own family. The only people who have any “right” to be this spiteful and unforgiving towards the Targaryens are Ned and Benjen (and not even them because neither Daenerys or Viserys are to blame for their kin’s actions, but you get my point), but Robert speaks as if the Starks were his family as well.

Mind you, all this still has a good deal of romanticization on Robert’s part. Lyanna is not the person he made up in his head any more than Ned’s character is different from sullen disappointing Stannis’ any more than the Starks were this perfect ideal family. But Robert projects, and romanticizes, and justifies, and then punishes the “substitutes” in his life (Cersei, Stannis, his family including his kids) for not living up to the made up standard in his head. That’s his nature.

OK, here’s a tiny nugget of wisdom that I’ve managed to get my head around in my 28 years, which might (just might, no promises) make you feel a bit better about what’s just happened.

Sometimes you have to fuck up on a MONUMENTAL scale before you can really address something that’s a problem. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking life is perfect and people never make mistakes. They do, even the best kind of people, and especially the broken kind of people who try to be better but don’t always make it.

From what we know (and that is very little, granted), Robert regrets his actions (whatever they end up being) and also tries to confess. This is a complete change for Robert - remember how he was with the affair? Arrogant about what he was doing with Aaron, and how many other one night stands he’d had. This is a completely different Robert Sugden, because of the way he feels about Aaron. He knows he’s made a mistake, and he wants to fix it.

Also, I was always kind of left unsatisfied with the way the November kiss was dealt with - we saw a glimpse of progress in that Robert tried to tell Aaron in that kitchen scene, but he bottled it. Afterwards, he kind of dismissed it off as nothing, being all “oh come on Aaron, you know no one comes close”, which didn’t even attempt to address Aaron’s deep seated trust issues. Hopefully, this is the catalyst to now deal with it.

This is where Robert Sugden, who has now fucked up monumentally, realises he’s got a problem with fidelity, and that it’s something he can’t dismiss as game playing or whatever; that Aaron’s concerns and insecurities are real; and that he needs to fight against it in order to be the husband he so desperately wants to be.

Also, I’ve seen a few people saying that Aaron won’t/can’t forgive Robert for this. Sorry but I respectfully completely disagree. If Emmerdale want him to forgive Robert, he will forgive him. And it’s not like it’s OOC - Aaron has been incredibly forgiving in the past. Not just Robert - but the lodge and the scrapyard scene and the grain pit are all examples of when he’s had to forgive robert in the past and has done so - but also Finn, who he forgave for shopping him to the police, and Andy, who I think (??) he forgave for being behind shooting Robert and letting him take the blame for it. Yes, Aaron’s trust issues centre on Rebecca, and yes, Robert has done the worst thing he could have done to hurt Aaron. But then, didn’t Aaron also do the worst thing he could have done to hurt Robert? Pushing him away, turning his back on their family. I love Aaron Dingle to the ends of the earth and back, I seriously do, but he isn’t blameless in making Robert feel hopeless. They’ve both broken their vows here.

He doesn’t deserve what Roberts done, that’s not what I’m saying, and Robert should absolutely have hell to pay for it. But I really think Aaron will be able to get past it, and I refuse to even entertain this being the end of Robron.

And for the record, I am still absolutely mad as hell at Emmerdale for doing this - as a bisexual it is heartbreaking to see them feeding into the bullshit view about bisexuality, but I still think it was a completely in character move for Robert. He talked himself into believing he’d lost everything - that Aaron had given up on them, on their family, and he reverted back to his old ways. ‘Falling in love is for mugs’, so instead let’s go back to when I was carefree and unattached and didn’t love anybody but myself. It’s in character, it’s just frustrating as hell that they felt the need to explore that side of his character so soon after the wedding, and after all of the development we’ve had for Robert.

I’m gutted about it all, I really am, but I’ll get past it. And Robron will get past it, too.

I just really wish they didn’t have to. But then, if it was all plain sailing they wouldn’t be Robron, would they?

anonymous asked:

How have you forgiven Robert so quickly?

don’t get me wrong anon, when the scenes aired i wanted to do a chas and smack the life out of him. 

I love this fandom, i really do, but i think a lot of people had one foot out the door when it came to robert, waiting for him to mess up enough that they have an excuse to hate him. and i understand it, i really do, but thats not me. 

I love robert, he’s been my favourite character for so long and that isn’t changing soon. He made a huge mistake, one that, whilst it took some nudging, he confessed to chas.

aaron hurt him, he said the one thing that robert dreaded to hear, that he was no use to him. i’m not trying to justify him cheating, it was a shit thing to do, but like he said to rebecca, he wanted to get back at him for it, and rebecca was the easiest way to do it.  

i saw an ask answered by @sapphicsugden and also one by @victoriasugden that i think sums up a lot. when was the last time you saw robert ‘thirty quid shower gel’ sugden look as rough as he did as last night? the last time he didn’t change out his clothes from the day before? because i think the only time i’ve ever seen it was ssw, when he was terrified he’d lost aaron, do you see a correlation there?

he regrets it, he hates himself for it and is disgusted with himself for what he did, he’s lost chas’ trust and now he feels like he has no home and is seconds away from losing his family for good.

that’s why i’ve forgiven him, because robert is in pain, and as awful as what he did is, he deserves a second chance for this. 


For Vane. For Teach. For Eleanor. 

“Charles is dead. The governor in Nassau hung him in the square. On the island I helped build, he thought he could do that and face no consequences. He failed to account for me.” — Edward Teach, XXVIII (3x10).

“Eleanor is dead. Anne is nearly dead, and I want him to pay for all of it dearly.” — Max, XXXIV (4x06).

“Your granddaughter Eleanor is dead. Governor Woodes Rogers plotted with Spanish forces to help him quell a resistance movement on New Providence Island by razing it to the ground. And Eleanor was killed as a result. I come to offer an opportunity to see that offense answered.” — Jack Rackham, XXXV (4x07).

“And you believe what you will, but it was neither I nor Flint nor the Spanish raider who killed your wife. That, you did.” — Madi, XXXVII (4x09).

“Don’t worry. No one’s going under the ship today. Though, the thought had crossed my mind. No, I’m quite certain I can do better than that.” — Jack Rackham, XXXVIII (4x10).

Theory: album and single release dates.

There has been speculation as to when twenty one pilots are going to release new, and like my last theory, I have spoken about it before in a few videos. Here is my complete theory so far, so it’s easier to read and understand.

16th of June, 2017

Over these accounts, and Tyler in a few instances, there have been hints toward the number 16. June 16 is the day that Tyler and Josh play at Firefly Festival, and Tyler had hinted on an Instagram post (the one shown on the 27th of June vvv) something about what was going to happen next after all the tour is over. I feel that they might play/announce a new song (tying in with the next date), or the album/pre-order.

The 16th of June, 2016 was also the day that Heathens was officially released, which supports my theory here that Heathens might be on the new album.

19th of June, 2017

In a Periscope livestream on TheBlurryEcho’s twitter account, it showed the date ‘19-[none]-17′, and when I assumed that the missing number was six, June, I realized that that was the day before Tour De Columbus starts. TheBlurryEcho tweeted on May 30th ‘three weeks’, and when I counted exactly three weeks from that day, it was the 19th of June, so that might possibly be the release date for a new song.

Tour De Columbus

As you’ve probably seen, all of the dates given by this account add up to Tour De Columbus. I have seen many theories saying that they’ll play one album for every show (ex: 20 Jun: Self-titled; 21st: RAB; etc), the final show being the release of the new album, which is a great theory, but I just have that part of my that seriously doubts it. As I said in my most recent video, I feel that they might play one new song at each show.  Ever since signing to FBR, the band have 5-6 songs on each album, dating back to Vessel Era, that go to radio and/or get a music video. So, if I am correct, they will play one song at Firefly + one song at each TDC show = 6 songs

27th of June, 2017.

Echo said that the album would be released on the 27th of a month before September, and based on everything relating to the band happening this month, I think it’s safe to say that June is unofficially-but-officially the set month for the release of the album. On Tyler’s most recent Instagram post, posted on 3 of June, there were exactly 42 dots, and 42 reversed is 24. 24 days after the 3rd of June is the 27th. [creds to a comment on a theory of mine] 

2nd of July, 2017

The Hex Code #7BD0E2 has been teased quite a lot, seeing as it’s the color blue. The Clique Theorist on YouTube made a point as to what each character could mean:

7 is July - B is Blu - D is Dec - 02 is July 2nd - E is Echo

7-02 is July 2nd (obviously) so that’s something. If the 27th of June isn’t the release date, then there’s a good chance that the 2nd of July is.

Let me know what you think! If you have a theory, drop it in my submissions/ask box!

anonymous asked:

As someone who works in television, I would just remind people that for 95% it is not Adam and Eddie who made decisions about Emilie and Bex but ABC. It's no surprise the three characters that are staying are the three with largest fanbase.

I very much agree with this. It’s the higher ups who ultimately make the biggest decisions. When costs need to be cut and such, we as an audience can’t blindly lay all the blame on A&E. This is still a business for everyone involved. I for one (no matter my personal feelings on it creatively) am happy at least Lana/Colin/Robert and the cast and crew still have jobs they can rely on for money. My heart goes out to those who had to be cut because of costs, I know that’s gotta suck.


anonymous asked:

people aren't seeing the worst in robert, he IS being the worst atm, the robron dynamic has become chrobert 2.0, this is literally happening on screen right now, we're not making this up! it's too awful to watch right now and it's understandable?? good on you if you can stomach this but you don't have to be condescending to those who can't

I’m not being condescending. That would imply that I understand that POV. I literally do not see it. I just don’t. I don’t think the circumstance, Robert’s actual struggle as a character or them as a couple are anything alike to Chrissie and Robert. Is Robert being written stupidly? Sure. But it does not for me for a FUCKING moment negate everything he has done before this. That’s not how life fucking works is it? If I were a person who’d changed for the better but something happened where I made some bad decisions and fell back on habits, would that literally make me a bad person? My growth would then mean nothing?

Because they are showing Robert freaking out but they are clearly showing why and it is all about Aaron. People forget that he was a mess. People forget that he was drunk. People forget that he was going to tell the truth. People aren’t taking into account how he is the only thing Aaron can rely on and Robert knows that. Or if they dont forget apparently its not important enough to take into consideration in regards to his motivation. BUT I’m not making THAT up. The show has CLEARLY shown their love. And that fear of losing that is the motivation.

Not because of fucking money or power or wanting to keep up appearances. Not because Robert wants to keep fucking Bex, he clearly does not, and have Aaron at home. He wants to be at home with Aaron. This isn’t a fucking thrill for Robert. The man is miserable and terrified. He isn’t even thinking ahead. He has no idea what he is doing. This is so fucking far removed from the affair that it’s a joke except for the lying. He is lying but his reasons? Not in any way the same. And Robert hates himself for it.

But it doesn’t matter because some have already made up their minds long before this or they don’t get the motivation. I could list why it is different in detail but I find at this point it’s not even worth the bother.

And that is on them. I don’t even mean that in any sort of critical way really. Personal experience or lack of experiences color people’s perception. They see one way or don’t another. It is what it is.

I’m not going to pretend I understand and on my space I’m going to call out what I don’t understand or like. I’m also not going to on to attack them on their space where they can say what they want to say bc that’s what their blog is there for.

But I am going to, after months of hearing how Robert is the worst and this couple is ruined, put my foot down and say I’ve had enough.

I do not like the Robert hate. I do not like that people, not the show mind you, BECAUSE THEY ACTUALLY ARE NOT SAYING THIS, keep negating the person he now is. I hate that Robert is not allowed to fuck up ever without it destroying him as a character apparently. I am pretty sick and tired of the negativity.

It’s not the show that is driving me away. It is literally the fandom.

You obviously can and do feel whatever way you do. (Thanks BTW for giving me permission to do the same. Really.) I don’t have to agree, like it or even understand it. I simply have to respect you enough to leave you to YOUR space to feel that way.

Appreciate the same.

One good thing that came out of this for me

This isn’t even me being negative but more a little bit grateful about it.

Most of fandom doesn’t really believe in Robert. (I mean, that’s okay, it happens sometimes with characters in couples. One of them is always less than.)

I had really fooled myself into believing that both the show and fandom would stand by the character of Robert even if he made terrible choices. I’m not even talking about condoning his actions, calling Robert out on his stupidity/bad choices is a full time job as a fan, but more that when he messed up, he’d get consideration and understanding and yeah, love. 

I spent the majority of my time in fandom, until recent months, really, just wearing what I called my Robert hate deflect suit of armor. Like I would always be aware and could just shrug it off. It was my own fault for not keeping that sucker near by anymore, lol. But I thought it had. I thought yeah people get that he is a mess and an idiot but that ultimately he isn’t worthless. I thought after the abuse story, his growth as a person, SSW, his love for Liv, his attempts to save his brother, and generally being a good person that yes we have arrived. Robert can maybe not always have feel like he trying so hard to be accepted and just be accepted. 

So it was a little shocking (still is a bit but I’ve got the armor back on so it’s becoming less and less sad for me) to see that nope. Robert is still considered garbage. That nothing he has done means anything. That he is a liar and always was. That not one of the amazing things he has done was worth much because he messed up. I mean I’ve actually seen that being said. The hate and the vitriol is sickening to me but it is what it is. 

So I have to be grateful to ED for this story because it reminded me that Robert will never be accepted or loved or protected or cared about the same as Aaron or Adam or Chas or Cain or any other character. I knew that coming in of course but had thought with character growth and Ryan’s amazing characterization that had changed for people. 

It hasn’t. 

And that is totally okay because I think he is just never going to be that character for a lot of people. They’ll like him again, maybe, when he starts acting the way they want, which I mean duh, lol, that makes sense. I just have to remember that always and deal with my constant need to hug him while calling him an idiot. I’ll have to deal with wanting to cry a little at all the effort made by him. I’ll protect him and love him and that’ll have to be enough. 

These are just feelings I’ve been having and I wanted to share them. <3

djpiggy557  asked:

I'd like to see companion's react to Soul that has Autism. Bonus points if you do the DLC companion's reactions too (Ada, Longfellow, and Gage.) (I am *so* sorry if this is in the wrong place or I'm doing this wrong, I barely do asks like this and I'm not quite familiar to this in particular. So I'm sorry if I get this in the wrong place)

You didn’t get it in the wrong place at all! My posts are little messed up after I’ve been sick and trying to work on stuff, but here you go! A little late, but here!

Cait: She is more easily frustrated than the other companions. She loses her temper a bit quicker, and has less patience for Sole’s perceived slowness. With time, though, she learns to respect Sole’s strengths. Sole’s need for repetition can be irritating during mealtimes, but helpful in combat, when they’re careful and methodical. Cait doesn’t need to worry about being blunt, because Sole has an easier time with straight speech than with sarcasm. She adjusts, and learns to accept Sole as they are.

Codsworth: Being with Sole from before the war, he understands Sole’s particular needs. Whether they need a certain kind of medication, or supervision so they don’t wander off, or help understand other people’s social cues, he’s programmed to know how to care for them. He also teaches others how to handle Sole, and inadvertently helps wasteland parents diagnose and help their own children. Being Sole’s assistant becomes a source of pride for him.

Curie: Wherever Sole falls on the autistic spectrum, she’s read hundreds of medical textbooks on how to help them. Sole doesn’t even need to “come out” about it, she can tell within a few weeks of meeting them. Because of her understanding, it takes away some of Sole’s pressure to conform, and they worry less about pretending to be “normal.” Curie can explain to others what Sole is or needs if necessary, but most of the time helps Sole to stay independent, doing her best to keep them self-sufficient.

Danse: At first, he doesn’t think Sole has any problems at all. They’re calm, methodical, they keep to themselves and get things done - what could be the problem? It’s only much later on that he realizes their social difficulties and other aspects of their disorder. Still, though, he doesn’t mind either way. Sole might have different needs than other people, but they’re still perfectly capable. Danse treats them with the same respect and friendliness as anyone else, never assuming their disorder means they can’t do something.

Deacon: He never lets on that he knows. There’s never a day where he’s like, “So… you’re autistic?” It’s just something that builds up over time. He makes sure to buy them softer clothing so it’s not overstimulating. He buys them earplugs to use when things get too loud. If Sole needs to do something a certain way or go a certain place, he’s totally there. Besides, he’s a smooth talker - if Sole ever makes a social misstep, he’s right there to do damage control. He cares, he just has to do it in a sideways sort of way.

Dogmeat: He becomes a sort of service dog. When he went with Mama Murphy, he understood the different between Mentats and Addictol, and gave her what she needed as she needed it. He learns to do the same for Sole, too. He learns to fend off people who invade Sole’s personal space. And to follow the same repetitious pattern Sole does every night, so they can sleep. And, if Sole has an “episode” and needs calming down, he’s right there to offer doggy kisses until they’re fine.

Hancock: He’s a fast talker, who tends towards impatience and ambition. He’s never rude to Sole. Quite the opposite. But Hancock just doesn’t like feeling like a babysitter, you feel? He needs someone who can keep up, who can walk and talk at the same time, who he doesn’t need to worry will get their foot in their mouth. By that same token, if Sole ever needs something, he’s there. He might not travel with Sole that often, but they’ve always got a place to stay and a listening ear, if they want it.

Nick Valentine: The biggest problem in their relationship is Nick’s habit of using sarcasm or expressions, leading to a lot of misunderstandings. Nick picks up fast, though, and learns to have an explanation ready whenever he says something off the cuff. Their relationships becomes similar to that of a parent and their child. Nick feels a sense of obligation to Sole, and of protectiveness. It comes off a little patronizing and condescending at times, but it’s always meant well.

MacCready: He’s not entirely sure what autism is, but he can’t help but think back to a certain kid or two in Little Lamplight. Kids who didn’t talk, or who acted funny, or who’d do things over and over or refuse to wear certain clothes. He dealt with them then, he can deal with them now. He talks plainly so Sole’s never confused, and never gives them a hard time if it takes them a minute to understand something. Besides, he’s no social butterfly either. Sole’s idiosyncrasies just make them more… unique. And he can handle that.

Piper: Her support is simple. “Okay!” She’s too much of an honest and unpretentious person to think any more or less of Sole because of it. Though she does ask a lot of questions. What do they need, how do they feel, what’s it like, etc. The questions are useful in the end, because then she understands and can help Sole when they need it. By that same token, she’s not overprotective or short-tempered or condescending like some of the other companions. Sole’s just… Sole. And that’s all that really matters, right?

Preston: Suffering from PTSD, he has his own issues to deal with. But, being in the Minutemen, he finds that military order and repetition helps, and tries to help Sole in the same way. They come up with patterns and routines that keep Sole feeling secure. Preston is earnest and kind, and often speaks simply. Sole can understand him well, and he can smooth over any problems from Sole’s lack of social understanding. The Minutemen accept everyone, regardless of how able-bodied they are. However Sole can help, if they try? Preston accepts them wholeheartedly. 

Strong: To be perfectly honest, if anyone could understand Sole’s predicament, it’s him. Social problems, sensory sensitivities, lack of speaking or difficulty doing so… They make a fine pair. And who’s going to question them? A Super Mutant and a wasteland warrior can do or say whatever they please. No one will argue.

X6-88: He’s not the most empathetic person at the best of times, but Sole is his charge, and as such, he educates himself on the best way to take care of them. This comes off a little blunt at times. “Sole is overstimulated. You will leave now.” Or something along those lines. Sole’s social difficulties don’t bother him, as friendship is overrated, in his opinion. But he keeps them safe, and mentally stable, and protects them when they need it. It’s as simple as that.

Note: As a neurotypical person, I did my best to portray and describe an autistic Sole to the best of my ability. If you have any concerns, feel free to message me, and I’ll explain if I did things in character or made an honest mistake.

opinions ooo (i couldn’t think of a title and this is long soz)

if you’re sick of seeing me writing massive essays with no capital letters, i’m sorry but i’m back baby. (i’ll put a read more in case you want to ignore me)

i’ve gotten some asks today and i thought instead of answering them separately i’d tie them all into one. it’s a bit of a jumble of thoughts really but i wanted to address them and i tried to remain as positive as i humanly can. I think the biggest one being: ‘do you think the fandom is hypocritical?’ which is a tough one to answer but i can try, so strap yourself in:

Keep reading


BATB science boyfriends AU sketches

I haven’t seen the new movie yet nor have I watched the old animation in a very long time, but I do remember something out of it and used that as inspiration with these pictures.

Though while I drew this I already made a story about these two in my head in this AU. Prince Robert Bruce Banner managed to piss someone off and was turned into a beast, and then he dedicated his life to try to reverse the spell (he has a laboratory, etc. in his castle). So, when Lord Anthony Edward Stark exchanged his freedom to [character]’s (still not sure whose) freedom, the Prince and the Lord started to bond. Well, they first really don’t get along, until Tony learns about the curse and what Bruce has tried to do (like trying to get the spell off of him with science). Then they science together, trying to lift the curse, Bruce often feeling like Tony tries to act like little smartass and Tony being occasionally frustrated by Bruce’s own pride. However little by little they start to learn about each other and have some feelings too.

And something something something…

anonymous asked:

It doesn't matter how much talking about it or deep conversations they have, Aaron will be a doormat if he forgives Robert. The show has made such a big deal about Aaron's "paranoia" and insecurities about Robert cheating. Now that he's actually cheated, there's no way those insecurities will *ever* go away. It'll eat at Aaron whenever Robert isn't around, he'll always be questioning whether Robert is cheating or not. If it was bad before, it'll be 10x worse now.

If that’s really how you feel then okay. My best advice is to walk away and be done with it. If you think they have somehow ruined your fave character, I’m really truly sorry, but I just don’t feel the same way. There is of course the fact that I still don’t believe that there will be a child at the end of this storyline so I suppose that makes a difference but even if there was I would still feel differently. I could give you a bullshit answer about how this is just a soap and it doesn’t always work the same way in real life but instead I’m going to tell you why the words human doormat want to make me put my fist through a fucking wall. So this is your warning I’m about to get really personal and rambly so if you don’t want any part of that I would check out now. I REPEAT THIS IS NOT ME SAYING THERE WILL DEFINITELY BE A BABY JUST THAT IT CAN STILL WORK IF THERE IS. 

When the ONS happened it hit me hard and I thought screw that I’m out. Then everything was so cagey and The Theory™ came to life. Then the baby spoilers hit and I came unglued that was the final straw. No way was Aaron getting past that. Who could, right? Then I went to my dad’s house and I hugged my baby sister and I watched her hug my step mom and I saw the genuine love and affection between them. Then I thought to myself god I really used to hate you. Yeah I felt you (all two of you still reading) do that double take. That’s right, me April, known to be the softest of softies, hated my baby sister from the first time I saw her. Hell even before that really. She was a living breathing reminder of my dad’s greatest betrayal and I wanted nothing to do with her or my dad really. Mind you this wasn’t some drunken fumble one night when he thought his marriage was over. A fact that Aaron himself acknowledge. He admitted to Robert that he knew he made Robert fell like their marriage was over whether it was portrayed properly on screen or not isn’t the point. That was the point they were apparently trying to get across. (Sorry I told you I would ramble.)

I remember how weak I thought my step mom was those first few months for taking my dad back. For staying with him after he did that to her. Remember this was two years of my dad lying and sneaking around to fuck another woman behind my step mom’s back and now we were stuck with this baby. But I can promise you this, never in my life have I seen strength like that of my step mom when she choose to stay. To work toward fixing her marriage and keeping her family together. (Sound like familiar words?) I watched he fight against those same insecurities and the struggle it took but she never gave up. She wasn’t a fucking doormat because she took the time to consider what would be best for her family in the long run. To question whether she could still find happiness with my dad again and to work toward building back the trust. She wasn’t weak because she saw a helpless baby and refused to take her hatred of the situation out on that child. She taught me what true love and forgiveness was in that way. It took a lot of work but they are stronger now than ever before. We won’t get that kind of time frame because everything works at warp speed on soaps but that doesn’t make it any less real.

People have to live and struggle with horrible insecurities and traumas like Aaron everyday. Should they just give up and stop trying to find love and happiness every time it gets hard? Aaron has never been happier than he has been with Robert. THAT IS CANON FACT! So why wouldn’t he want to hold onto that? Nobody is saying it’ll be easy. It’ll take a lot of work on both their parts (Individual and couples therapy anyone???) but it absolutely can be done. People can find a way to move past something like this if they really want to and Aaron loves Robert enough that he could still want to make it work.

So there it is. The reason I get so defensive about the term human doormat and why I’m not going anywhere anytime soon. I’ve made my peace with storyline just like I made peace with my dad. I’m still an daddy’s girl whenever he’s around.  And my baby sister, my pride and joy, well I dare any of you to get to know her and not fall in love. I’m guessing by your ask I never had a chance to change your mind but fuck it I feel better. *shrugs*