Day 03: Your favourite subject at Gallagher → Culture and Assimilation
“Culture and Assimilation has been a part of the Gallagher curriculum for more than a hundred years, Zach.”
We turned down the corridor to the tea room. “A Gallagher Girl can blend into any culture—any environment. Assimilation isn’t a matter of social graces.” I stopped in the hallway with my hand against the door frame. “It’s a matter of life and death.”
286. The Gallagher Academy faculty played a subtle game of matchmaker for Rachel and Joe once Joe starting teaching. Among other plans to get them together, the two of them found themselves suspiciously alone in different rooms throughout the mansion at least five separate times; mostly, Rachel blames Madame Dabney for it.
You mentioned on one of your gallagher girls posts that joe is the biggest zammie shipper ever and I'm literally laughing so hard because ITS SO TRU
I am approximately 3002% sure that Joe took a good look at Zach, took a good look at Cam, took a sip of his coffee and said, “What a fine Sunday afternoon… perfect weather for setting up the strongest power couple in the western hemisphere.” Like, seriously, all of CMH is just Joe setting Zach and Cam up.
First of all, DC. I mean, enough said, right? You cannot tell me that Joe didn’t look at the two finest young Pavement Artists he knows and put them on each other’s tail. You cannot tell me that Joe didn’t think that they were the only two who could keep up with each other. You cannot tell me that Joe didn’t look at two of the kids he loved most in the world and say, “Ha. This’ll be fun.”
Then there’s the brush passes in Roseville. Oh god, do not get me going. Cam literally turns to Bex first. Like, Bex is definitely going to be her partner – no doubt about it – but then Joe is like, “Nuh uh. Zach,” and he basically requires that the two of them touch hands at some point that afternoon if they want to pass the assignment. JOE.
Cammie looking in the pitcher and catching Joe and Zach’s reflection at the waffle bar. We’ll never know what they were saying – I’ve looked for years and haven’t seen any evidence – but I am at least 89 percent sure that Joe Solomon was being the beST WINGMAN THAT CAMERON MORGAN COULD HAVE EVER ASKED FOR. Zach and Joe could talk about Cam for ages they are both totally amazed by her oh god I’m crying
When that scene got cut from the book (siiiigh the best ones always do), we had Cam and Zach detecting lies with each other. Why was Cam doing this CoveOps exercise with Zach and not, say, her best friend Bex? I’ll give you one guess. That’s right. It’s because JOE. FREAKING. SOLOMON. Told her to partner up with the person across from her. When has Joe ever cared about who partnered with who? Answer: never.
Also, I’m pretty sure that Joe bribed Madame Dabney into making them dance in C&A but HEY. THAT’S NOT OFFICIAL. THATS JUST THE SHAMELESS ZAMMIE SHIPPER IN ME.
Anyways, I’m fairly certain that the main reason Joe kept pushing them together is because he wanted them to team up and form an alliance because he knew that they would work well together and that, together, they’d be one of the strongest teams out there. Cam and Zach challenge each other time and time again, and Joe has sworn to teach those two as much as he can before they leave the safety of his classroom. Part of that vow was making sure that they had people in their lives who would help them continue to grow, even if he wasn’t around to make sure it happened. Whether he meant for it to end romantically or not isn’t as important as the fact that he loves them both, and he wants them safe, and he knew that they would watch out for one another. In the end, romance probably had very little to do with his motives.
Culture and Assimilation isn’t like our other classes, so I guess that’s why Madame Dabney’s tea room isn’t like our other classrooms. French silk lines the walls. The lighting fixtures are crystal. Everything in that room is beautiful and refined and reminds us that we don’t just have to be spies— we have to be ladies.