lucaling

Promises, promises

Four months ago, Kait had found out there was a tiny risk that if she had her baby the old fashioned way it’d kill her. Or the baby. She’d been barely five months along when the doctor found the complication and even if Kait knew she shouldn’t she insisted they try it the old fashioned way; women had been giving birth for thousands of years without drugs and knives and surgeons, she was pretty sure she could do the same. She knew Lucas was worrying, but she was sure she could do it. Or she had been. Lying in the hospital bed with her friends around her, she was tired. The pain coming and going, every beat of her heart closely monitored as well as a whole bunch of other machines hooked to her. She was tired, and honestly, she was scared. The baby inside her, it was the only thing that really mattered in that moment. She wanted her baby girl to survive and have a good life, and so help her, she didn’t want her parents anywhere near her daughter.

Lucas, pacing the length of the room for maybe the fiftieth time, looked pale. He looked worried, he looked dead on his feet and Kait felt so guilty. How could she not? If she had just caved and told them to go ahead and take the baby out some odd ten hours ago then he wouldn’t be looking so tired, and she wouldn’t be feeling like her body was being ripped apart every fourteen minutes. Labour really was a bitch!

Four chairs were pulled up on the one side of her bed; one for Reid, one for Macon, one for Arabella and one or Harper. On the other side, in the bigger and slightly more comfortable chair, was Lucas’ sweater. It had been his chair, the first hour. Before she had started having arrhythmia and the doctor had put her on every monitor they had. She’d told him to calm down and to go call their family. Thankfully, he knew what she meant by family and hadn’t called her mother, father or her sister and brother. She kind of regretted not calling her brother, but she looked at Macon and Reid and felt like her real brothers were right there and all the rest was just bullshit.

“L-Luke, please stop pacing,” she said in a tiny voice, completely unlike her own.

He looked at her, and he looked so much older. A tiny smile tried to make it’s way to his lips, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I’m sorry babe, I’m just-”

“Worried,” Reid finished.

“Yeah.”

At least one thing had come of this whole thing; Luke and Reid didn’t hate each other anymore. She wasn’t sure they had ever really hated each other, but they were actually starting to get along. And it made her feel better. Safer.

“I know honey, but could you sit down for five minutes? It’s exhausting to see you pace.”

“It kinda is,” Macon agreed and Harper took his hand. Kait looked at the boys in the room, and her heart clenched. They were all so worried. What was she doing? Was she really this selfish?

“Okay, time to go,” a nurse, Patty, said as she came into the room. “The mother to be needs some sleep before all hell breaks loose and with all of you here, she won’t be able to rest.”

“Sure,” they murmured. Reid and Macon pressed a kiss each to her forehead and Lucas quickly pressed one to her lips.

“Don’t worry so much,” she whispered against his lips, and the smile almost reached his eyes that time.

“I love you too much not to worry.”

“We all do,” Arabella agreed. Kait looked up and smiled, a weak smile.

“I have something, before you all go. I know this is going to be hard, and it’s going to be a long day, but before this all- Like Patty said, before all hell breaks loose, I need you all to promise me something?”

All five of them were standing on the left side of her bed, looking like she was about to tell them goodbye.

“What?” Macon finally said.

“If this goes south- No, stop, Luke, listen, just listen would you?” He did, but he started pacing the length of the foot of her bed, looking at her with tears in his eyes.

“If this doesn’t go as I plan, I want you all to promise me something. I don’t doubt you, Luke, I know you’ll be a terrific father. But I need you guys to promise me something,” she said, looking mostly at Macon and Reid. “I-” Her voice broke and she swallowed hard. “I love you, all of you, but you two- you’re my family. If I die-” Reid looked away from her and Kait felt her heart drop. Damn this was hard. “I want you to promise me to take care of my baby girl.”

Lucas stopped short, staring at her. “Girl?”

“I wanted to tell you before, but you made me promise not to.”

“We’re having a girl?” Arabella said, her voice close to tears.

“Yeah.”

While Macon and Reid came closer, Harper and Arabella hugging in the background, squeaking a little about a baby girl and possible names (Kait knew they did it to take their minds off the situation; she would have done the same thing). Reid and Macon cradled her one hand between their two hands, and she felt unusually small.

“Promise me you won’t let my parents anywhere near her? I don’t want them in her life, and I know Lucas will cave eventually. He’ll want her to know her grandparents and through them, maybe me. But if she’s got you, she’ll have the best parts of me. The three of you, my boys, are the best part of me.” She laughed. “God, I sound like a badly written tv-character. But what I mean is, I want all of you to promise me you’ll take care of her, together. All of you.” Her eyes made their way through the room, and with his hands curled around the pipe that made out the foot of her bed, Lucas nodded.

“I love you, anything you want.”

“Kait, listen to me.”

Kait met Reid’s eyes and smiled. “Don’t go all big brother on me now, Batman. Just humour me. Promise me?”

“Okay. If you promise to not die.”

“I can’t promise you that…”

“I’ll take care of her,” Macon smiled. “And I’ll even promise to slap some sense into him if he refuses too.”

Kait laughed, and nodded. “Thank you. And just remember I love you and I totally wouldn’t be me without the two of you? Okay? I couldn’t have asked for better friends, brothers or godfathers for my baby.”

Having calmed down, in the background, stood Arabella and Harper, quite and still.

“You two, you make sure to take care of them, yeah?” she said, and she saw the tears in their eyes and they nodded. “I’m glad we got the chance to- to-” her voice broke and a slow sob made her gasp for air and close her eyes.

“All right, that’s enough Kaitling, you need to sleep.”

“It’s Kait,” the room said, in unison, and through her tears she laughed.

“I love you guys, just—stick together and be a family. If I don’t make it.”

“No more talk about not making it,” Macon said, his pointed finger meeting the tip of her nose. “I’ll see you after. Sleep tight.” He kissed her forehead and caressed her cheek quickly.

“I better see you on the other side of this,” Reid said, not half as confident as Macon.

She couldn’t tell him she would, could she? So she nodded and felt her throat close up and he kissed the top of her head. Harper and Arabella quickly made their way up to the bed, hugging her and saying something sweet and from the heart. She smiled at them and nodded, she couldn’t promise them anything either.

Last one out was Lucas. He stood there, holding both her hands and looking at her belly. “I can’t lose you.”

“Alison.”

“What?”

“The baby, she looks like and Alison in the sonograms.”

“That’s what you’re telling me right now?” he said, his eyes meeting hers with deep disbelief.

“Yes. It is. I can’t say goodbye to you. Because if I do, I might not fight. And I need to fight. Right? For you, and them, and her. If I say anything other than normal us things right now, it might be a goodbye and then I might not fight and if I don’t fight I might not come back to you and I have to, because you made me the happiest girl on earth and our baby deserves two parents and I need you to not say goodbye to me-” She finally broke away, not really crying but she couldn’t breathe anymore. “I love you. And you need to go home, eat something, take a shower and maybe get some sleep? They’ll call you. I’ll make sure they call when it starts.”

“Okay. Okay. I love you.”

“Now kiss me,” she said, in a slightly amused tone.

He bent down, and the kiss that should have been a goodbye kiss turned into a burning ‘I love you so much’ kiss that made her heart flutter. Which the machine picked up on and made a beep that Patty the nurse laughed at.

“Okay, Romeo, do what your wife tells you. Get outta here kid, she needs her sleep.”

He grinned down at her. “I love you.”

“I love you.”

“And I love our baby,” he added, as Patty was shooing him from her bed, still smiling.

“Alison.”

“Alison.”

“Sleep tight honey.”

“You too, babe.”

 

Ten hours later, in the middle of giving birth, Kait blacked out. Lucas was removed from the room and a code was called over the PA system in the hospital. He was in tears when he came into the waiting room, his sister hugging him close as he cried. What if he lost both of them?

 

Fifteen hours later, Kait woke up because there was a very annoying beeping sound in the background. Her eyelids fluttered open and as they opened, a wave of emotions and memories washed over her, overwhelming her. The beeping became more rapid, and she looked up at a very blurry ceiling – the sound slowing back down. She was figuring out where she was, and what that beeping was. Her heartbeat. She was alive. And the white blurry ceiling wasn’t some ceiling in heaven, or the morgue. She was back in her room. There were soft noises coming from the left side of the room. Her head slowly turned to the left, seeing a baby bassinette that was the hospitals between two chairs. One containing Reid, and the other Macon. Kait was sure she had gone crazy in all of it, when she looked and saw Macon cooing and smiling at the baby in his arms. Macon. Not Reid. Reid looked at her, taking a few steps forward to take her hand.

“Hey,” he said, and Macon got up from his chair too.

“Hey there mom. Look, Ali, it’s your mommy,” he cooed, and Kait smiled in disbelief. What had her world become during the hours she had been out of it?

“How are you feeling?” Reid whispered.

“Tired. Help me sit up?” she said, feeling a little weaker than she should have, she reckoned.

Reid helped her sit up, and as he did she noticed they were alone on their side of the room.

“Did the girls go home?”

“They’re setting up stuff for the baby at your place,” Macon said, kissing the top of Alison’s head and handing the baby to Kait. “She’s gorgeous. I think I’m going to like being an uncle,” she smiled, and then kissed the top of Kait’s head.

“I knew you would,” she smiled at him, and then looked down at the precious little pink bundle in her arms. “Hi Ali, hi.” She bent down, her eyes close, and exhaled soft against the top of her baby’s head. “What did you do with your daddy? Hmm? He should be wrapped around your little finger by now,” she said in a voice ten shades different from her normal one.

“He’s exhausted,” Macon said, pointing to the sleeping Lucas in the chair next to her bed.

“I can see that.” She swallowed hard, looking at Reid and then back to Lucas. “It was bad?”

“It was bad,” Reid confirmed, not having as much as looked at Alison during the entire time Kait had been awake.

“Did I-?”

“No. You were alive the entire time. You fought like hell.”

She looked down at Alison. “So did she. Look at her, she’s perfect. My baby.”

“I’m still kind of focused on the fact that you’re alive,” Reid confessed, his voice really low.

“I’m sorry I scared you, both of you.”

“What about me?” a voice, tired beyond tired and weak as it was, said from the right side of the room.

“I’m sorry for scaring you too. You were sleeping, I didn’t want to wake you yet.”

“I know,” Luke said, sliding forward in his chair, and taking her hand. He pressed his lips against her it, and held it against his heart. “You had me scared half to death. You can ask just about anyone.”

“It’s true,” the other boys said, in unison.

“She’s got your eyes,” Kait said softly, looking from Ali to Lucas.

“She’s got your everything else,”  he replied.

“We’ll leave you two alone,” Macon smiled. “Come on man.”

Reid, unwillingly, got up from his place next to Kait and then looked back down at her. “Don’t ever scare us like that again, okay?”

She nodded. “Promise.”

 

Lucas took Alison from Kait’s arms, and walked around the bed to put her in the bassinette. “I love you,” he said softly, coming up closer to her. His strong arms moved her, just a little, so he could fit in the bed with her. “The idea of losing you, her, my entire life…”

“I’m fine, honey. I’m fine. I’m tired, a little sore, but I’m fine. And you’re a daddy.” She beamed at him, and he kissed her temple.

“I am. The worlds happiest, because the mommy to his daddy is still alive, so is the little bundle that made him a daddy.”

“You sound hilarious when you talk like that,” Kait laughed, gasping a little as she realized her lower body was twitching with pain. “I need to not laugh yet.”

“You need to sleep.”

“You’ll be here when I wake up?”

“Always.”                                                                                                

“Remind me when I wake up, I need to have a talk with Reid?”

“Sure thing honey.”

“Good.” She leaned against him, sighing happily, and then slid back into sleep.

 

She’d made it. She was a mom.

Perma-Starter Call

Hai-hai! This is a permanent starter call. See all you have to do is Like &/or Reblog this for a random starter.

  1. If you wanna plot, you can IM me.
  2. No, you don’t have to follow me. (That’d be super nice though really!)
  3. I’ll try to RP with any character or any fandom (though it’d help if I knew the fandom personally or else I might be a little lost.)
  4. OCs are forever accepted. <3 I adore OCs.
  5. AUs are also accepted.
  6. Shipping my muse with yours is also accepted. *cue Lucal Wesker-sama angrily protesting in background* XD Just say if you wanna.

I’m pretty much anything goes when requesting a starter. And I’m not shy so please approach me. :3 And if you wanna blog this around “promoting” to land me some more RP partners - thank you I love you

Rain (lucaling)

It was raining something fierce; she was running from her car to the school and if she had been paying attention she would have recognized the jacket and the build of the person and the- well, the everything. But she was getting soaked, and she hated going all day with wet shoes.

“Hold the door, please!”

And he did. And she was standing, basically, in his arms and she didn’t want to move when his eyes met hers. She tried a smile, even if it was fake, because on the other side of the door… Her. The blonde boob-job. Her voice was strangled when she said “Hey” and the way he was looking at her, still holding the door open for her as she walked past him, it actually, physically, hurt.

“Hi.”

She turned and looked over her shoulder at him, and he was still standing there, jacket half over his head, door open, pouring rain outside. The blonde boob-job was barking something at him, and she smiled a sad little smile. She wanted to go up to the other girl and tell her to count her lucky stars. She wanted to tell Lucas to skip school with her. She wanted to smile for real again, without a human distraction by her side. But she couldn’t. So she kept walking.

I knew (Lucaling)

And if you’re ever sad
I’ll make you laugh
I’ll chase the hurt

She rubbed her eyes, feeling really, really out of it. And far too warm. Which probably had something to do with the boy-arm that was wrapped around her, holding her close to him – not to mention the fact that there was a blanket covering the both of them. Why was there a blanket? Managing to look up over the back of the couch, she realized it was pitch black outside – and the oven timer blinked a very green 4:00. She guessed 4 am – since it hadn’t been that dark at 4 pm in months. The boy under her stirred a little and she smiled as his eyes fluttered, but stayed closed. His arm tightened around her, and she was happily pulled closer to him. She rested her head on his chest, just listening to the sound of his heart, and his breathing. And eventually; his talking in his sleep. Which was new. She’d never heard him talk in his sleep before, and she was pretty sure it was something he didn’t tend to do. But there it was. Clear as day.

“She’s- everything, Bella. I don’t,” and then he mumbled too much and she really wanted to know what he was saying! “-not without her.”

She pressed a kiss to his mumbling lips, and he slowly woke up, blinking in the dim living-room. “Hey,” she whispered.

“Hey yourself.” He was looking really disoriented.

“We fell asleep.”

“Mmm, we should continue that then.”

“Not until- You know that I love you right? That I don’t want anyone else?”

He looked a little surprised. “Sure.”

“No. Luke-” Her hand pressed against his heart. “You’re everything. I don’t ever want to lose you again.”

He smiled, his hand on the back of her head, his thumb rubbing her cheek. “You never lost me in the first place.”

“No, I know, you can’t lose something that’s not yours, but Lucas-”

“That’s not what I meant.”

That stupid crease between her eyebrows just wouldn’t stay away. “What did you mean?”

“I’m pretty sure the first moment I felt my arms around you, I was yours.”

“But- that was… What? Three seconds?”

“I just wanted that pain in your eyes to go away, so when you smiled…” He shrugged.

She closed her eyes, smiling, trying to think of anything to say. But he wouldn’t let her. Pulling her down to him, he wrapped both arms tightly around her, he whispered “Now would you please stop thinking and just sleep?”

“But, won’t they miss you-?”

“Who cares? I’ll miss you more than they miss me. Come on.”

She looked at his closed eyes, smiled, and actually did fall back asleep against him.

The next morning they were woken by a very noisy Ellie, banging pots and pans, only to make Lucas make breakfast for them. She really did earn the ‘Evil Nan’ nickname.

Let's call it love at first sight (Lucaling)

“How long have you been together?”

Kait looked up from her desk. “What?”

“You and Lucas. How long?”

She knew her eyes were blinking a little too fast, and she was a little surprised by this question. During the two months her and Abigail had been living in the same dorm, the other girl had never asked her anything personal before. “Uhm, I don’t- Since graduation. A little over four months? Why?”

“Oh nothing, it’s just…” Her pen tapped her desk. “You just seem so… together. You know? Like you’ve been together for a really long time?”

“No, not really. I’ve only known him a little over a year…”

“What? That’s crazy!”

Kait laughed, shrugging. “I guess.”

“So… When did you know?”

Kait must have looked questioning, as Abigail laughed.

“That he was the one? You know, your perfect… everything? Because you two are- perfect.”

She smiled, a smile that slowly got wider. “I think I knew when he made me smile the first time. I was in a not so good place, and he just made everything—happy. Like sunshine.”

“How long had you known him then?”

She didn’t know whether to laugh or gasp. “About twenty minutes.”

Broken promises (Lucaling)

“Coming!” He smirked a little to himself, walking towards the knock on the door. He could almost hear Arabella bubbling about having forgotten her keys, and how she was just back to get something and-

It wasn’t Bella. The blonde girl standing on the front steps to his house wasn’t the blonde girl he had been trying to occupy his time with; it was the one he was trying to keep himself too occupied to see. There was a sinking feeling in his chest and the strained look on her face, the smile that didn’t reach her eyes, was almost worse than not seeing her at all.

Keep reading

My own ships that KILL me:
  • Belle and Marcus; Marbelle is all of the angst turned into fluff turned back into angst. Just you wait!
  • Kait and Lucas; Lucaling are adorable and perfect, when they’re actually together. Stupid kids thinking they’re better without each other!
  • Katie and Nick; Don’t have a ship name, but it doesn’t matter because if you thought Marbelle and Lucaling was all the pain and horrible angst, this couple takes first place with their– everything. ((Not to mention, everyone knows Marbelle and Lucaling get each other at the end. I’m not even sure Kari and I know if Katie and Nick get each other in the end. Because there’s… people. Person. Whatever. That just adds to the angst though, and it’s fine.))
  • Mary and Regulus; Marulus… Well, I don’t even… Hate, love, friendship, death. I mean…

So this morning when I was trying to sleep I was having the hardest time closing my eyes, and I know I haven’t posted in a while so it might be why, but there was this hysterically sobbing Kait in my head. And after a while she calmed down, a lot, and just started pleading. I know it has nothing to do with the fact that she’s graduating. It has to do with - as everything in her life does even if she’s hiding it well - Lucas.

And this is what the girl had to say once she stopped crying:

No. No. Please. Please come back. Please come back to me. Please come back, come back and fight for me. I just want you- I want you back. I just want you to please, please come back. Lucas, please - please?

And I can’t actually get a post out of her right now, she’s still all raw emotions. She’s done this before - silly little character - but never likeTHIS.

Not without, uhm... (Lucaling)

”Someone’s here for you!”

Kait froze on the steps, seeing who was standing… well, in the middle of the living room, all dressed up. While she was wearing pyjamas.

“What are you doing here? Arabella told me you were going to prom…”

“I am. That’s why-”

“Luke, just go, have a good time and-”

“I’m here to take you to prom.”

She could barely get the word out, her throat felt so tight. “What?”

“I know we’re supposed to be all—distance. But, I don’t want to go to my senior prom without- uhm, with someone I… I just want it to be you, okay?”

As he spoke his voice sounded as tight as her own had felt, and she knew she was being stupid when tears fell down her cheeks. “That’s why I wasn’t gonna go,” she said, her voice all over the place. “I didn’t want it to be anyone—anyone but you.”

She’d made it down the stairs, and into his arms, and she was actually crying into his clean white shirt – which she chided herself for, and he just waved it off, his fingers tangling in her hair. “Shh, I just couldn’t go without you.”

“Just a few more weeks,” she whispered, and he wiped away one of her tears.

“Just a few more weeks. Now go put a dress on – unless you want to wear your pj’s in the photo…”

She stopped, and looked up at him. “You won’t go away, you won’t leave? You’ll still be sure of this in twenty minutes when I’m all dolled up?”

“I’ll stand here all night if I have to. I’m not going without you.”

She wanted to, and she could tell he did too, but she took a step back before she actually did kiss him and smiled. “Okay.”

The dress that had gotten smaller

“DADDY! DADDY DADDY DADDY!”

Kait laughed, because she could hear Alison running through the entire house, her little feet incredibly loud for such a small girl. Four years old, and she already sounded like a linebacker running through the house.

“What pumpkin?”

Kait left the bedroom to see Lucas coming down the hall towards the stairs, and Alison ran back in the direction of her father’s voice: she heard her footsteps stop and turn around, somewhere in the kitchen Kait reckoned.

“MOMMY NEEDS A NEW DRESS!” the little girl shouted, running into her father’s arms. Kait stood at the top of the stairs, looking down as Lucas caught her, turned her upside down and looked her in ther eyes.

“What are you talking about? Are you trying to get me to go shopping?” He tickled her and the little girl shrieked with laughter.

“No, no! Put me doooown!” And he did what his daughter told him, because in all fairness, the little girl had her father wrapped around her little finger, and Kait knew full well. She leaned against the bannister, listening to their conversation. “Mommy’s boobs are too big! She said so herself,” Ali said, hurrying to get the words out.

“Mommy did no such thing,” Kait laughed, and took two steps down in her new dress. “I said it’s a little tighter than I would like.”

“Looks fine to me!”

“You would say that,” Kait smiled. “But in all honesty, Luke, I think it’s like a size too small in the upper area.” She opened her eyes wide, indicating a memory when she had complained about the same thing. She never knew if he knew what she meant when she did that, but then his face lit up and he looked down at Ali.

“Kiddo, why don’t you run up at get mommy’s earrings? They’re in my bedside table, kiddo.”

The little girl grinned from ear to ear and ran up the stairs, slowly but fast enough for the both of them.

“You’re-?”

“I dunno, I didn’t notice until now. I never know lately, ever since Ali, but it’s been a while, and I mean a while. I didn’t think too much of it because of the gaps before but… I think we might be having another baby?”

Lucas’ eyes lit up, and he picked her up. Hers arms wound themselves around his shoulders and she closed her eyes, drawing in a deep breath; he smelled like freshly cut grass and laundry. Both things she loved.

“We need to make sure,” he said, putting her down.

“Obviously. I’ll call the doctor tomorrow, but let’s just go out and enjoy our anniversary okay? We can think about new babies come tomorrow morning. I never drink when we have Ali with us anyway…”

“I know, she won’t know the difference. But I will.” He kissed her, a deep kiss that made her head spin. And then they heard a loud ‘ick’ sound from the stairs. Their baby girl was back.

“I only found a box-”

“Bring it down here honey,” Luke grinned, picking his daughter up and then reaching her arm out to Kait. “Open it.”

Kait gasped; what about breathing? She smiled down at the little box. “You shouldn’t have!”

“Don’t they sparkle just like mommy’s eyes?” Luke grinned, holding Ali out to see the diamond earrings.

“Put them on mommy!”

“You’re spoiling me rotten,” Kait whispered, putting the earrings on.

He put Ali down. “Go put your shoes on kid, we gotta get going.” He then leaned in, and kissed Kait again. “That’s the idea, beautiful. That’s the idea.”