low residue

how scared are you right now pickles

I try to stay off Twitter these days because I’m trying to live a more positive and productive life and getting drunk five nights a week and yelling at strangers on the internet is not an integral part of that plan. Also, my family members have started following me and “liking” my tweets about farts and cussing, which makes the prospect of doing tweets about farts and cussing – otherwise a large part of my brand – rather less enticing.

As a result, I spend more time on Facebook, yelling at the friends and relatives of people I care about, because I give very few fucks at this particular juncture and if your ex-husband thinks bitches need to “settle down” about that Google dude who Google-emailed his Google-colleagues about how women are naturally bad at computers, I have no qualms whatsoever about giving him a piece or two of my mind. I love going on Facebook to yell at Uncle Breitballs. 

But this afternoon I logged on to find my friend Dan asking a question that, to be honest, I was not planning on entertaining. I was just gonna pop in to tell some middle-aged white women with MAGA avatars to fuck off and go about my day. Instead, Dan asked: “How scared are you, right now, of yourself or someone you love dying because of a nuclear war?”

Wait. Does Dan mean like, the residual low-level fear of knowing a man with the moral and emotional strength of cheap toilet paper has the nuclear codes? Or like, did a thing happen?

A thing happened. North Korea says they’re gonna attack Guam, and Donald Trump is going to blow up the entire goddamned planet to teach North Korea a lesson. I mean, or it’s just a couple of wildly insecure men who don’t give a fuck about turning the mental health and physical safety of tens of millions of people into collateral damage in their dim dude pissing contest.

I decided to make pickles, because either I’m going to eat the pickles, or the people who ransack my decimated home in the aftermath of a nuclear strike will eat the pickles. They will have Joshua McFadden’s Six Seasons cookbook to thank for them. 



Half a cup of rice vinegar

a tablespoon of white wine vinegar (I used sherry vinegar, who cares)

1.5 cups of hot water (I used hot tap water, I guess you could kettle it)

5 tablespoons of sugar (I might accidentally have put in six)

1 tablespoon of kosher salt


Some green beans or carrots or radishes or whatever else you ripped from the limp grip of a neighbor dying of radiation poisoning. 

also some garlic cloves, smashed


Put all that shit together and stir it until the seasonings dissolve. Put your veggies in a jar with the smashed garlic cloves and pour over the brine. Refrigerate and eat until your extremities wither.

anonymous asked:

I know you've made mention of this before, but I was wondering if you had any thoughts on the way the fish hobby diagnoses and medicates their own fish, and how readily available those medications are? It kinda squicks me out. Every time I see someone with a sick fish, and someone else diagnosing and prescibing meds, I get a bad feeling. I know dragging a fish to a vet will often make things worse due to stress and water quality issues, but I think we medicate too readily for not being vets.

some countries antibiotics are available for fish over the counter in pet stores, without needing any kind of prescription. These antibiotics are easy to misuse and will inevitably end up in the environment somehow, usually down the drain when waste water is changed out by percentage. It’s also very easy to have a tank with low levels of residual antibiotics in it, which encourages antibiotic resistant bacteria, which I do not want.

That said, the majority of aquarium fish diseases are related to husbandry. Advice from other fish keepers and specialized aquarium stores is useful, because most of the time it’s a setup or water quality issue.

The majority of ‘medication’ available over the counter for fish here are not actually antibiotics, so they don’t concern me overly much. They exist for a purpose, and if they do the job, that’s great.

If they’re not a prescription product, anyone can recommend them, it’s not really being ‘prescribed’.

But I run into a problem when a fishkeeper ants antibiotics, metronidazole for example. I have to, legally, examine the fish to dispense it. I can come to their house and view the aquarium, in fact it’s better if I do it that way, and arrange for the medication either as an injection (ideal for large fish) or compounded into food, but fishkeepers generally don’t want to do this. They wanted to buy something off the shelf like they have for everything else.

And if they are going to call a vet out for the super expensive fish, they’ll call the ones that are at least partially specialized in fish. Which is perfectly sensible.

Most of the treatments recommended by laypeople for fish are variations on a water change and different types of salts, and that doesn’t bother me too much. The readily available antibiotics in some regions concern me, because they have such potential for misuse.

But if the industry doesn’t have much demand for vets who will see fish, few of us will maintain those skills. It’s supply and demand.

anonymous asked:

For beta to omega are you gonna have Vader and Obi-Wan bond? I really hope you do because I wanna see what Obi-Wan would do if that happened. Would he rebel secretly, or try to trick Vader into believing that slowly bringing democracy back would make him the Empire better?

You can easily claim that Obi-Wan is confused when he wakes, staring up at the cream colored ceiling above him as he categorized the various aches and twinges of his body and the low residue of drugs in his systems.

The last thing he remembered was…

Falling, the durasteel pole, being impaled.

That memory has him sitting up and throwing the covers aside, hands pulling up his shirt to touch his stomach only to find a small pale pink scar.

And then he becomes aware of another in the room, dark and familiar.

Obi-Wan jerked his head up to look to the edge of the large bed where Anakin stands, smiling faintly at him with the terrible yellow gaze on him.

He’s weak and worn but he gets up on his feet and backs away from the alpha, teeth bared.

And yet…

Anakin only chuckles. “I’m glad to see you too Obi-Wan though I’d rather you hadn’t attempted to sneak onto Coruscant to abduct my kids.” He offered lightly, staying still. Like a predator in wait.

Obi-Wan glared at him. “They deserve better.” He gritted out, voice roughed from dryness and Anakin gave a low hum.

They spent some time just staring at each other before the emperor moved and Obi-Wan tensed.

“I’ll give you a choice Obi-Wan.” Anakin slowly approached the omega, settling his hands on frightened and tense shoulders as Obi-Wan pressed himself against the wall in a futile manner of escape. “And it will be yours and yours alone. You can leave, take a transport off Coruscant and the only promise I want from you is to not engage directly in any Rebel battle as I highly doubt I can outright stop you and I’ll stop searching and hunting for you. Sith spit I’ll even provide the credits for your transport.” He smirked though inwardly he was panicking.

Green eyes narrowed up at him, not shrugging the hands off as Obi-Wan evaluated him. “…Or?” He questioned quietly.

“Or, you stay, with me, here. You become the twins mother though we tell them about Padme, show them her, give them all the information they want about her and make sure they know her.” Slowly Anakin slid his hand to cup Obi-Wan’s cheek, stroking gently. “You become my Emperor consort and mate, you watch how the government unfolds and get your own seat in the Emperor pod and your own voice to veto laws though we show a united front.”

Obi-Wan stared at him in shock.

“…You’re asking me to…”

“I love you. I have loved you forever it feels like but I knew with the Order around you’d never give in.” Anakin snorted then ducked down slowly. “And I know you love me still. All I’m asking Obi-Wan is for the chance to show you we can make the galaxy a better place.” He offered earnestly.

He stopped before he got too close, already seeing Obi-Wan tense in preparation to shove.

Obi-Wan swallowed hard after a few moments of frantic thinking but the offer was too good to ignore and if he could help the galaxy… what was one life against the entire galaxy. “…I hope you have nightmares about those little bodies in the council chamber but…but fine. I give in.” He whispered.

A strange kind of spasm went over Anakin’s face at that before he settled back to smiling.

And then he claimed Obi-Wan’s lips in a kiss, sealing the deal and Obi-Wan’s fate in one go.

Distillation of Essential Oils, Part Two

Hydrosols: A By-product of Distillation

Hydrosols (also known as hydrolats, floral waters, distillates, or “water of _____”) are the by-product or product (depending on the distiller’s purpose) of the distillation process.

Hydrosols are fragrant waters that contain the essence of a plant in a milder, more accessible, and easier to use form than essential oils. They are suitable for all manner of applications for which essential oils are too strong – for example, they are clothing safe, non-comedogenic, hypoallergenic, and pet safe (provided they are the hydrosols of plants that are non-toxic and poisonous to pets, for example, lily hydrosol would be dangerous to cats, but most medical grade essential oils are dangerous to pets due to chemical burn concerns.)

They are quite like essential oils, but are far less concentrated. During distillation, the water-soluble constituents of the aromatic plant and the essence of a plant is released as steam, which condenses into two products – the essential oils, also offered through Haven Craft, and the hydrosols.

Hydrosols also retain a small amount of essential oil. Every liter of hydrosol contains between 0.05 and 0.2 milliliter of dissolved essential oil, depending on the water solubility of the plant’s components and the distillation parameters.

*Please Note: The addition of essential oils to water is not at all the same as true hydrosols, and it is recommended that you read the ingredients label on products to ascertain whether or not you are getting a true hydrosol. When water and essential oils are mixed together with or without a dispersant, this is called a “spritzer” or “aromatic spritzer,” and this product should not be confused with a true hydrosol.

Hydrosols do not need to be shaken before use.


Expression, also referred to as cold pressing, is a method of extraction specific to citrus essential oils, such as tangerine, lemon, bergamot, sweet orange, and lime. In ancient times, expression was done in the form of sponge pressing, accomplished by hand. The zest or rind of the citrus would first be soaked in warm water to make the rind more malleable in the pressing process. A sponge would then be used to press the rind, thus breaking the essential oil cavities. The sponde would then absorb the released essential oil.

Once the sponge was filled, it would then be pressed over a collecting container. The expression would then stand to allow for separation of the essential oil from any released water or juice. The essential oil would then be siphoned off.

A more modern method of extraction, much less labor-intensive, has been termed the “ecuelle a piquer” process. It involves a prodding, pricking, sticking action to release the essential oil.

During the ecuelle a piquer process, the rind of the fruit is placed in a container with spikes that punctures the peel while the device is rotated.

The puncturing of the rind releases essential oils that are then collected in a small area below the container. The end process is the same as above.

The majority of modern expression techniques are accomplished by using machines using centrifugal force. The spinning centrifuge separates the majority of essential oil from the fruit juice and water.

Some aromatherapy and therapeutic oil companies sell both a distilled and an expressed citrus essential oil from the same species. The main differences between a distilled and an expressed citrus essential oil  are their toxicity, volatility, and aroma.

Distilled citrus oils deteriorate more quickly and are considerably more unstable than the expressed oils. Distilled citrus oils are not recommended for aromatherapy use.

The one exception would be for distilled lime essential oil, which is considered to be superior in aroma to its expressed counterpart.

Both the expressed and distilled essential oil of bergamot contains the phototoxic furanocoumarin, bergaptene. The aroma of distilled oil is considered to be of lower quality than the expressed oil.

Expressed lemon oil contains the phototoxic furanocoumarin, bergaptene, where as the distilled lemon oil is considered to be non-phototoxic. And like bergamot, the aroma of the distilled oil is considered to be of lower quality.

Expressed lime oil contains the phototoxic furanocoumarin, bergaptene, whereas the distilled oil is not considered to be phototoxic. The main difference with lime is that the distilled essential oil is considered to have the superior aroma. The distilled lime is considered the superior of the lime oils because it has greater similarity to the natural lime scent.

Extraction Techniques for Absolutes (Extracted Oils) & CO2 Extracts


Flowers were being processed via enfleurage in the Grasse region of Southern France long before the modern method of solvent extraction was in widespread use. In the antique perfume trade of France, many flower scents were extracted via enfleurage.

Enfleurage is now considered an ancient art that is passed down through family lines, from generation to generation.

Enfleurage is a cold-fat extraction process that is based upon the principles that fat possesses a high power of absorption, particularly animal fat. The fat used must be relatively stable against rancidity. It is a method used for flowers that continue developing and giving off their aroma even after harvesting (e.g., jasmine and tuberose).

This technique involves placing the flower petals on a layer of glass that is first spread with a thin layer of fat, called “chassis”. The volatile oil diffuses into the fat, then the fat is collected and the oil is extracted from the fat using alcohol.

Once the alcohol evaporates what is left behind is called the absolute.

Today, Grasse continues to be one of the few areas in the world that continues to employ enfleurage as a method of extraction, although it is rare in the aromatherapy market due to the expense. If one finds a jasmine enfleurage on the market, this would typically be considered an absolute.

Some of the therapeutic grade absolutes (extracted oils) carried by Haven Craft were created using enfleurage.

Solvent Extraction

Some plant material is too fragile to be distilled – the heat will break down the material to unusability long before oils are released – and so an alternative method must be used. Solvent extraction is the use of solvents, such as petroleum ether, methanol, ethanol, or hexane, to extract the odiferous lipophilic material from botanicals.

The solvent will also pull out the chlorophyll and other plant tissue, resulting in a highly colored and thick, viscous extract.

The first product created during solvent extraction is known as a concrete. A concrete is the concentrated extract that contains the waxes and the fats of the botanical material, as well as the odoriferous oils from the plant.

The concrete is then mixed with alcohol, which serves to extract the aromatic principle of the material.

The final product is known as an absolute or as an extracted oil.

Solvent extraction is used for jasmine, tuberose, carnation, gardenia, jonquil, violet leaf, narcissus, mimosa, and other delicate flowers.

Neroli (orange blossom) and rose can be distilled or solvent-extracted.

The name neroli typically implies the essential oil, whereas the name orange blossom is commonly used for the absolute or hydrosol of neroli. The name rose is used to describe either the essential oil or the absolute.

Companies selling essential oils should rightfully clarify whether the product you are purchasing is an essential oil or absolute. This information should be on the label and in the product catalog. It often isn’t, though, so reflect upon the price – if it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

After the solvent extraction process has been completed, the resulting absolute will have an extremely low concentration of solvent residue, approximately 5 to 10ppm (parts per million). The current European Union standards are for less than 10 parts per million solvent residues in a finished absolute.

This does not interfere in their use as therapeutic oils – some believe it does, but my teacher did not.

It may interfere in their use as medical grade essential oils. Even with such a potentially small residue (less than .0001%), many holistic herbalists disagree with the use of absolutes for individuals with a compromised immune system, due to the potential effect of the residual pesticide.

However, absolutes do have therapeutic value and are often used for psychological purposes and for animals, particularly horses. Many therapists incorporate absolutes, such as rose, jasmine, and tuberose absolutes, as a valuable part of their therapeutic applications of aromatherapy. Ultimately the decision to use absolutes is up to the practitioner and personal preferences.

Absolutes are used extensively in the cosmetic and perfume industries due to their strong aromas – they often smell more like the botanical material than essential oils do.

There are also different grades of absolutes.

The top grade is the uncut, which can be a thick or semisolid substance, making them difficult to work with.

Less expensive grades are diluted with alcohol or a carrier oil, called a “filler”, to make them more user friendly, although often the strength of aroma is slightly diminished.

If the absolute pours very easily and is thin or runny, it has likely been “cut” or “filled”.

Most bath oils and gels, candles, shampoos, toothpaste, fly spray, aromatherapy suppliers, and air fresheners (somewhere around 98 percent), use absolutes rather than medical grade essential oils.

CO2 Hypercritical Extraction

Hypercritical carbon dioxide (CO2) extraction is a relatively new process, developed for for the extraction of aromatic products.

CO2 under pressure will turn from a gas into a liquid, which can then be used as an inert liquid solvent.

This liquid solvent is able to diffuse throughout the botanical material, thus extracting its aromatic constituents.

CO2 extracts contain most of the same constituents as their essential oil counterparts, although they can contain some elements not found in essential oils. For instance, the essential oil of ginger (Zingiber officinale) does not contain the bitter principles, however the CO2 extract does. Also, the CO2 extract of frankincense (Boswellia carterii) has immune enhancing and anti-inflammatory activity not found in the essential oil.

CO2 extracts are known for their strong similarity in aroma to the actual plant aroma, sometimes stronger than the abolutes produced from pressure extraction.

Other common CO2 extracts on the market include German chamomile (Matricaria recutita) and Calendula (Calendula officinalis).

The three main disadvantages for this process are cost, potential pesticide residue, and the lack of information regarding their safety, therapeutic benefits, and medical benefits.

With regard to pesticide residue, carbon dioxide extraction has been demonstrated to concentrate from 7 to 53 times more pesticide residues in the final extract. Therefore, it seems pertinent to only use organic plant material for CO2 extraction.

Perhaps as more CO2 extracts become available and more practitioners use them, further details regarding their applications will become apparent.

Two of the most common essential oils available via CO2 extraction include frankincense and ginger.

Phytonic Process

The Phytonic process is a one of the newest methods of extracting essential oils using non-CFCs (non-chlorofluorocarbons). It is also called Florasol Extraction. The oils produced are called phytols.

The oils are promising and are very close to nature; however, it does use fluoro-hydrocarbons which can be potentially harmful. The process also has some potentially negative environmental effects that need to be addressed.

More research needs to be done into phytol oils and the process itself before Haven Craft will carry phytol oils.

Warm Oil Infusion

It is possible to extract the volatile oils from plants into warm carrier oil by gently macerating the botanical materials and placing them in a carrier oil and slowly bringing that oil up to heat. These are not considered essential oils or absolutes, but they are good for home therapeutic when a great deal of oil is called for, such as in producing a salve or balm to be used all over the body.

Freeze Distillation

There is a method of solvent extraction that can be done at home to obtain a kind of extracted oil. It would not be considered a therapeutic or medical grade essential oil or absolute, but it is considered an alchemic oil and suitable for use in magick.

The process generally uses undenatured ethyl alcohol or very high proof grain alcohol. It does not use rubbing alcohol.

The plant material is macerated in alcohol for some time, then the plant material is strained out. The alcohol is then placed into an environment below the freezing point. The oil will congeal on top of the alcohol, which will not freeze, and can then be extracted. This method is very good for delicate materials that will burn before steam distillation releases the oils, such as jasmine.

God I am so hungry.

Foods I am not allowed to eat (for at least two more weeks) include milk, eggs, soy, wheat, butter, nuts, seafood, cheese, beans, anything with a lot of fiber, cruciferous vegetables…

And being put back on steroids makes me ravenous for all these things I can’t have. I want bread so bad. Pizza or bagels, or pizza on a bagel. I am used to eating low residue, but doing this testing to see if food contributes to my gut issues is just making me hangry.

Ugh. Because of the RA, I am off wheat, dairy, and nightshades. I am also on harder drugs that help the Crohn’s so I’m on a fairly high-fiber diet (oatmeal, greens, fruit…)

But. Colonoscopy next week which means low-residue diet (no seeds or skins)

I’m thinking polenta, roasted sweet potatoes, and chicken is gonna be my go-to here. But I also figured I’d make a post with the crohn’s tags for any other suggestions!

I know this is random, but I miss Mini-Wheats. I used to eat them every morning for breakfast. Now I can’t even think about eating them. *sigh*. Crohn’s has this nice way of taking every food I love out of my diet. Now I’m stuck with boring, milk-free, extremely low-residue food. That is, if I’m even able to eat anything.

DILF Fic 2K14

This came from an anonymous prompt asking for Robin to be a hot DILF Regina wants to bang. I mean, that was basically it, that was the whole prompt. Somehow it turned into DILF watch on my blog, so I sincerely hope you all enjoy the result! Unbeta’d but I like living life on the edge, so.


The first time Regina noticed him, she was picking up Henry from school, waiting in front of her car. He was leaning against his, drinking coffee, and her eyes wandered down his frame, then back up to his face. He was looking back at her by the time she traveled back to his face and winked, which made her roll her eyes as the bell rang and children came pouring through the doors. His was young, a backpack almost as big as he was strapped to his shoulders, and she smiled just a little before her own son emerged, granting her a smile when he saw her. With on more glance at the other man, Regina and Henry got into the car, leaving school behind for the weekend. But she thought about him, a man with dimples she wouldn’t have missed seeing before.

Monday was teacher conference day which meant no school for the kids, but as Regina walked through the hall toward Henry’s classroom she saw a vaguely familiar boy admiring the lockers, reaching up to turn the dials.


Regina turned at the sound of the voice which, without a body of students to absorb the noise, echoed in the halls. It was the same man again, though he was closer now and she could see that his eyes were an impossible blue that crinkled when he grinned as he playfully grabbed for his boy. And then, his eyes turned to her and if he thought she didn’t notice him starting on her legs and making his way up her body, he was an idiot.

She didn’t hate it, though.

“If we’re to continue running into each other this way, shouldn’t we at least know one another’s names?” he queried, and she raised an eyebrow.



A small voice chimed in. “Roland!" 

Both adults laughed until a teacher called for Regina and she turned to acknowledge the woman before looking back at Robin. "I do hope I’ll see you Tuesday after school,” she murmured, and then she was gone, leaving Robin to grin in her wake.

Tuesday afternoon was met with much anticipation, and Regina shifted from foot to high heeled foot as she waited on Robin to arrive. He was late and she was irritated, though she knew rationally she had no reason to be. She was about to simply get in the car to wait for Henry until she heard a rich voice behind her and she was smiling before he finished his sentence.

“Coffee, for the lady. I take you for a fan light milk.”

Taking the paper cup, Regina laughed, unable to contain a smile at his correct assumption. “You’re right. Is that your gift? Correctly predicting coffee orders?”

“Oh, there are others I’m sure,” he said, voice pitched low in a way that made Regina’s stomach flip.

“Why have I never seen you here before?” she asked, suddenly very aware of how close they were standing to one another.

“Roland switched from morning half days to afternoon. Do I get a question now?”

Amused, Regina nodded.

“Join me for a drink this evening?”

She wasn’t expecting that and was so thrown off guard that she found herself saying yes.

“Good,” he murmured, leaning in and pressing the word against her ear as the bell rang.

Her stomach flipped again, lips parting just a little, and then he was out of her space, focused on his son as he came running into his arms.

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