In honor of today, I’m going to center today’s truth about me on my discussion with my husband last night, but first a little preface.
A year before we got married, I told my husband about my attraction to the opposite sex. We were young and fun and toyed with the idea of a threesome. It was more of my idea, and although it never happened, I noticed that he became a little weary of my appreciation for other women. It made me seem weird so I let it go. We never spoke of it again until last night.
Last night I told my husband that I’m bisexual. I’ve always ran away from the term because of the stigma that followed it. I have heard too many people say things such as “she’s only bi so she can hoe around with more people” or “look at the fake gay girls calling themselves bi” or my favorite “Bisexual women are a turn off, they’re just following a trend.” None of this is true, and it’s been a major factor in me rejecting the main fact about me; If I wasn’t married, I would happily date men and women alike. When you’ve struggled with a feeling for years, and have been scared to be ‘you’ for a long time because of Christianity and family, it gets tiring. You expect the worst of people that you love and care about.
I expected my husband to give me a weird look, curse me out and/or talk about how wrong I am. He didn’t. He asked if I was sure, I explained that this has always been a part of me, I’m queer. And you know what his answer was? "And you’re my wife, I love you."
I am convinced that I am married to the one person that was literally made just for me.
My truth is I am a bisexual black woman.