A Good and Lovely Detention
Snape: *looks up from grading papers* Miss Lovegood, what are you doing?
Luna: I am scrubbing the cauldrons clean, sir.
Snape: *clenches teeth* Yes, I can see that, Miss Lovegood. What confuses me is why you are scrubbing them with a scouring pad and not the toothbrush I provided you with when you arrived. Where did you even get that thing?
Luna: I had it in my bag, sir. I brought it with me.
Snape: How did you know to bring a scouring pad with you? I hadn’t even decided that I would have you cleaning cauldrons until earlier this evening…
Luna: Oh, I always carry a scouring pad with me, sir.
Snape: …You are saying, Miss Lovegood, that you consistently carry a rough sponge with you?
Luna: Yes, sir.
Snape: …At all times.
Luna: Yes, sir.
Snape: …You’re still supposed to be using the toothbrush, Miss Lovegood. Those were my instructions.
Luna: Actually, sir, your instructions were to not use magic, and then you handed me the toothbrush, thus insinuating that would be what I should use. However, I have this scouring pad, and so I opted to use it, instead. It is making it much easier to clean these cauldrons, you know. I am glad I had it with me. My mother always said, ‘Luna, you always carry one of these with you, no matter what, because messes are everywhere!’ And she was very right, sir. These cauldrons are filthy!
Snape: Just what exactly does your mother do, Miss Lovegood…?
Luna: My mother is dead, sir.
Luna: *looks at scouring pad fondly*
Snape: ……….Carry on, Miss Lovegood.
*goes back to grading papers and sees that the next essay belongs to Harry James Potter* *puts it at bottom of pile to face at a later time, unable to viciously grade* *questions life*