Part of me thinks it’s really sweet how Niall is easing us into the brown hair and the other part of me wants him to show up one day with those dark brown locks so I can have a good old-fashioned 1d meltdown.
A/N: this wasn’t a requested imagine, I just fell in love with Niall’s new song! I absolutely adore it. It’s the sweetest song, mixed with just the right amount of sadness. So, expect some fluff, as well as some angst. It definitely won’t be as angsty as some of my other stories, but I really hope you guys enjoy and I hope this makes you guys cry tbh!!! That’s honestly my ultimate goal in life. THIS WILL BE IN TYLER’S PERSPECTIVE. There isn’t a lot of dialogue, but I really wanted to have this be a story, more so than anything else. I just really felt like that fit the idea much more than too much dialogue. Also I apologize for not being as active in writing, but life has been crazy!!!
The sun broke through the window, resting on (Y/N)’s face perfectly. I would wake up just to kiss her when nobody was around. Her eyes would flutter open and I would be greeted with a smile. Her laugh would echo through the room as she would slap me playfully.
“Good morning, love.” I said softly, laying my head back down on my pillow and looked into her eyes.
“Good morning, Ty.” she would respond lovingly.
That’s how all of our mornings went. When she left the house her perfume would still linger through the air. It all felt too good to be true. She was absolutely perfect; she was kind, caring, down to earth, and she was a strong-willed woman. I loved that about her. Even though she loved me, she didn’t always have to depend on me. She would constantly spread positivity throughout social media and on her blog, and she would always have a smile on her face when things didn’t go her way. She just wanted everyone to be happy all the time.
Maybe there was a reason that she was the way she was. If there was she never told me. Either way I loved her endlessly because of it. She had her flaws, but I never saw them as that. Those “flaws” were the things that made (Y/N), (Y/N).
Sometimes when I missed her I would see her shadow running around the house or on the streets right next to me. I don’t think anything is ever going to change in this town. It was always fascinating to me to see all of these people grow up with me. Their faces would change and mature, and their lives moved on. But something about the town made them all stay even as they grew older.
Whenever (Y/N) came home from work, I wanted to tell her everything about my day, and I wanted to know how her day was. Even if she had a tiring day at work, she would come home and greet me with such energy and light. She was one of those people who emitted a positive light whenever she was in a room. She gave people a sense of belonging. She was kind to everyone she met. There was just something about her that made me the happiest man alive.
“Hey Ty!” she said excitedly. “How was your day? I want to hear all about it.” her eyes gleamed with love and passion, yet another thing I adored about her.
I smile broadly and take her hand.
“Well, my day was good. I went to the studio with Josh today and got some new songs recorded. I think the album is going pretty well! It sounds really good, and I’m so so excited for you to hear it. We’ve been working hard… and there’s even a song dedicated to you in there.” I said a little more silently.
Her eyebrows raise and she looked at me with disbelief.
“You’re kidding, right? A whole song just for me?” she asked excitedly.
I nodded my head and gave her a quick kiss.
“I had to. How could I not?”
She giggled and jumped into my arms. I spun her around as butterflies started to form in my stomach. Whenever I was with her I would always feel nervous. After I put her down, I put a hand on her waist, while another one took her hand in my own. I started to dance with her, even though no music was playing. If the whole world was watching us I wouldn’t care. She continued her laughing fit until she ran out of breath.
She looked up at me and stood on her tiptoes to whisper three simple words: “I love you.”
I smiled and kissed her, before saying those three words back.
It felt like we had been together for an eternity, and I knew she was the one. I would then go on to propose to her. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, and no one else. I wanted to be by her side forever. I couldn’t bear the thought of her being with anyone else.
We were engaged for about six months. Planning the wedding was stressful to say the least, but we managed it somehow. I wanted this to perfect for her. We wanted our day to be perfect. We decided on a color scheme, which included our favorite colors. We both picked out our favorite flowers and had the florist manage to mesh them together and make them look good. As for food, we had our favorite restaurant cater for us. We ordered our favorite items from the menu and decided on a 5-tiered red velvet cake, with a raspberry center. We chose a simple yet beautiful design, and decided to have little figurines of us at the top of the cake.
Things were in place. Everything was fine. Our wedding date was coming closer and we couldn’t be more excited to get married to each other. Autumn was coming, and our wedding would be held outside, adorned by the beautiful colored leaves that would help accent everything and make all of our photos look absolutely amazing.
Naturally, I had all of my brothers by my side, as well as my best friend Josh as my best men. I wanted this day to be perfect. I wanted this to be everything she’s ever dreamed of. Everytime she walked in the room, she could still make me nervous. This day would be no different. In fact, it would be even worse than before. It was our wedding day, and she would be in this beautiful wedding gown that she picked just for this event. Don’t get me wrong, she was beautiful every day I saw her, but there’s just something so different about a wedding, and seeing the woman you love in a wedding gown.
As she walked down the aisle, my eyes fixated on her. She looked like an angel. She was glowing, and tears were already in her eyes. I covered my mouth in awe, as tears started to form in my own eyes.
As she made her way down to me, she took my hands in hers, as we exchanged vows.
“I, Tyler Robert Joseph, take you, (Y/F/N)(Y/M/N)(Y/L/N) to be my lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part. I promise to be faithful, supporting, and encouraging. I believe in you, the person you will grow to be and the couple we will be together. With my whole heart, I take you as my wife, acknowledging and accepting your faults and strengths, as you do mine. I promise to be faithful and supportive and to always make our family’s love and happiness my priority. I will be yours in plenty and in want, in failure and in triumph. I will dream with you, celebrate with you and walk beside you through whatever our lives may bring. You are my person—my love and my life, today and always.“ tears fell down my face, and I struggled to complete all my vows. But I did, and those words felt really good coming out of my mouth.
(Y/N) smiled and wiped her tears before she took a deep breath to recite her vows back to me.
“I, (Y/F/N)(Y/M/N)(Y/L/N, take you, Tyler Robert Joseph to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part. I promise to encourage your compassion, because that is what makes you unique and wonderful. I promise to nurture your dreams, because through them your soul shines. I promise to help shoulder our challenges, for there is nothing we cannot face if we stand together. I promise to be your partner in all things, not possessing you, but working with you as a part of the whole. Lastly, I promise to you perfect love and perfect trust, for one lifetime with you could never be enough. This is my sacred vow to you, my equal in all things.”
I don’t think there was a single dry eye that night. As the night went on, we took our first dance as a married couple. I held her close and knew this was the best decision I had ever made in my whole life. Now the whole world did see us dancing, but it felt like no one was actually there. She rested her head on my shoulder as we swayed slowly to the music.
After the song was finished, I went and grabbed the ukulele she gave me as a present. I stood in front of her and sang “Can’t Help Falling In Love”. Some say it was our theme song. I was lucky to be in love with my best friend.
Time passed and we had been together for about a year. Life had been crazy. I was off tour on a break, and went to the doctor’s to get an annual checkup with (Y/N). A week later, the doctor called us back in to talk. And in that moment I knew something bad was coming. No one’s life could’ve been this perfect, right? I held my breath the entire time going back to the clinic.
The nurse called our names and we walked into the doctor’s office. I played with my hands and (Y/N) had to grab them to help calm me down. An eternity passed by before the doctor came into the room. The look on her face told me everything. The words she spoke crushed my entire being. Everything became a blur. The world went out of focus and I disconnected.
“I’m so sorry to tell you this, Mr. and Mrs. Joseph… but after the checkup we got the results that came up positive for terminal leukemia for you, (Y/N)…”
Even in this time (Y/N) still had a smile on her face. She simply told the doctor thanks, and then immediately asked about treatments. But wasn’t that the whole deal with the word terminal? It meant that it couldn’t be cured?
We left the clinic after that meeting, and (Y/N) knew I was feeling distressed about the whole situation. She took my hand in hers and gave it a tight, reassuring squeeze. She promised me that we would make the most of whatever time she had left. I broke down. I hated the thought of her leaving me, even if it wasn’t her fault. I hated the thought of being alone again. I hated knowing I wouldn’t be able to love anyone else like I loved her.
As the year went on, the days were also taking more and more of my wife. There were times when she would be too tired to get up. There were no longer moments where she would ask how my day was going. There were no more days when I could dance with her. This disease… this thing that was taking my wife away from me affected everyone. Things were different. The light that was once there was now too dim to recognize. It’s always hard to see the person you love suffer. It’s hard to know that they only have a limited time with you left.
And then I hit rock bottom. (Y/N) was admitted into the hospital when I found her unresponsive one morning, right before Thanksgiving. The doctors worked for what felt like hours on her. Eventually they delivered the news. (Y/N) had to be put on life support. She could no longer breathe on her own. She would no longer see the sun rise, she would no longer see the dreams she longed to have and achieve with me.
I walked into the room that day, my eyes already swollen from crying so hard and for so long. I made the decision to take her off the support. I knew she didn’t want it. After she was diagnosed, she asked me to do this for her. And let me tell you, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I sat in the room for a while, trying to memorize her features. I closed my eyes and would remember her voice, listen to all the videos I had gotten of her. I wanted to remember her smile, how it could brighten up a room, her laugh, that was so contagious. I didn’t want her to fade.
The funeral came up too quickly, and I couldn’t speak. Josh had to finish for me. I sat in my chair and stared at the casket that was holding my wife. I wanted to scream at the sky for taking her away from me. I wanted to break things, I wanted to know why they had to take her away. As everyone started to leave, I stayed. I sat on the grass and wept.
There were so many things left unsaid. I never told her how everything came back to her. I never told her that even after getting married she still made me nervous whenever she walked into the room. I never got to tell her that she was the cause for all the butterflies in my stomach. I never got to tell her that I remember everything that happened the day we met. I never said, “I love you” enough. We never got to live our lives together.
Now, wherever I go, shadows remind me of her. I will walk into our house, the smell of her perfume still clinging to the air. Perhaps she was always sick, but she never said a word to me. Even so, I couldn’t be angry with that. I could only blame myself for not noticing before. When she died, she took a part of me with her. No matter what, everything would lead back to her. And I hoped that my memory would allow me to remember her forever.
She was my car radio, and fall took her. I now sit in silence, wondering if things get better from here. Maybe they do, and maybe they don’t. There’s not really a way you can tell, is there?
Autumn was once a season filled with love and passion, as well as great memories that allowed me to finally know what love felt like. But now, autumn will forever be the season that stole my wife away from me. It will be the season that seems most dreary, the one I cannot face alone, and the one that will be hardest to survive.
And no matter what I think now, this town will never be the same.