If love is blind, then you must feel my heart
A collection of fingertips and lips,
signatures of their names left in braille
I drink my fears from a flask made of flesh
loving you was realizing
a fresh dozen of roses
will wilt away some day
If love is blind, then you must hold my hands
A regret that I can’t write down,
signatures of their names left in braille
I saved your tears inside of a flask
loving you was realizing
the ocean will some day
reach my shores–
a tsunami of emotions
left in a hurry
If love is blind, then I must feel your heart too
is your heart scattered with hieroglyphics too?
it’s such a tragedy to love without eyes
so coat my skin with your taste
and I’ll surrender my feelings
to someone new, but only if I knew better–
No wonder why it is hard to open up.
i left my name in braille not on your heart,
but on your lips instead.
so the next time someone kisses you,
maybe they’ll wonder about the ones
who kissed you first.
i burn love letters into my skin,
but i can never get it right.
so the next time someone kisses me,
maybe i’ll wonder if it’s real
or just a fling.
a fresh dozen of roses,
but they’ll still wilt.
if love is blind,
then i must be blind too.
a poem without a proper ending,
the only way that i know
if you’ve been here or not–
If love is blind and we were in love,
did I see for who you really were
or who I thought you were to me?
15:47 sometimes the words i can’t say build walls in my throat, post guards to lean against my teeth, an oppression that forces my thumbs to tap out text messages i never let myself send [UNSENT]
15:48 you take my scarf every morning. i think you like how it smells. i think you notice that i notice. i don’t think you notice that i take yours too [UNSENT]
16:10 yess i got the milk, blue like you asked. did you want me to grab bread? [SEEN 16:11]
23:45 every conversation we have is a complicated mess of maybe and could be and i wish it would be [UNSENT]
00:59 sometimes i think i can hear you breathe through the walls. your sighs shake the foundations of our house and they rattle my bones. i hate that you’re unhappy and i hate that i could help if i just opened my mouth to tell you i love you because i do. i do. i just can’t say it yet [UNSENT]
03:09 the last time you told me you loved me it was because i’d stubbed my toe and then flailed around the room like we were on a boat rolling over the waves and i had nothing to hold onto but your laughter and so i prolonged the moment, drew out the pain just to see you smile for a little longer. i didn’t know what to do, what to say, how to act. how to say it back [UNSENT]
08:05 you took my scarf again and i took yours. i watched you through the window as you flung yourself from the front door. tonight i’ll roll my eyes like i always do when i pull it from your neck. i’ll laugh because it’s a habit by now and we’ll linger in the silence that follows, two stars in the same sky but still thousands of light years apart [UNSENT]
22:05 that’s it. that’s enough. i can hear you crying through the wall we share. it’s muffled like you’re trying to hide it and it kills me that you think you need to. i’m putting the kettle on and we’re going to eat cake and i’m going to kiss the crumbs from your face, if you’ll let me [SENT] [SEEN 22:05]
07:00 i think that last night was the best night of my life. i love you. the weather woman said it might snow. i love you. don’t forget to take my scarf when you leave. i love you [SENT] [SEEN 07:01]
I think in another life, we
were unkind to each other.
That’s why we met again,
to try and fix things. But
things didn’t work out
again, and I hope we are
given another chance in
Your skin is naturally purple
and green, and those weren’t
bruises, no, it was just your
paint chipping, it was just who
I thought you were washing away.
We never knew each other,
we only talked in words with
many definitions because we
were afraid of meaning one
thing, we were afraid of
committing to love, a word
everyone knew except for
I wanted to tell him that it was because his words were too kind and his eyes were too green. That his kisses were too sweet and his promises too unconditional. I wanted to tell him that it was because his love was too easy to fall into, and that if he left like the last one did I wouldn’t know what to do. I wanted to tell him that if I put my all into him, he could just as easily leave with every piece of me. That I had just finally got those pieces back. I wanted to tell him, I wanted to. But I couldn’t.
I’ll find you in the way that girl walks as though she may fall over her own two feet. I’ll find you in the sips of coffee I savour at the cafe we used to frequent. I’ll find you in the laugh of the child who can’t possibly contain the happiness felt. I’ll find you in the smile of the boy who speaks to his love across breakfast.
It’s okay that you can’t love me.
Please believe me.
I lost myself
After I gave you my all.
I gave you my heart and
When I did,
It became your duty to protect it,
Not break it.
I was a damsel in distress
And you were supposed to be
My knight in shining armour.
You weren’t chivalrous,
You broke your oath.
You were always
So fond of your sword
And you acted gallantly
Swearing on your sword
To protect me with all you had,
But it was that sword…
That sword that you used
To stab my heart.
I gave you my heart.
I gave you my all,
But you waited
Until I was most vulnerable
I gave you my heart
But you returned it
Broken beyond repair.
I lost you.
You lost me.
I fear I will never find love.
Not because I’m unlovable,
But because I learned
How much damage one can do
No matter how knightly
They may seem.
I now realise
That you wore your amour
To hide the villain behind
The valiant “hero.”
we will break the rules
a forbidden love, but somehow it grew
amidst cracked ground
they said there was no chance for us
but we proved them wrong, didn’t we?
and we are fighters
did we make this work simply to rebel?
but its real
more real than this façade we live day by day
they called us liars for loving
they called us thieves for stealing each other’s hearts
but how is it a burglary when we are both so willing?
so different, yet alike
we should not compliment each other, and still
a deviant kind of love
yes, that is what we have created here
they said that this would end swiftly
nothing more than a daring dalliance
so brightly burning, and then out when the wind threatened to blow
they expected us to be fickle with the affairs of the heart
but we are misfits, not matchsticks
and we do not love lightly.
“ once you start it’s hard to stop, you feel yourself begin to fall but you don’t resist because you’re falling with him and you’re not scared because for the first time in a long time, you can feel your senses are heightened in a way you could never have imagined every touch feels like fire, every kiss ignites a flame then the inevitable; you land. and you can’t get back up, no matter how hard you try, how hard you fell because you’re broken and he’s not there to fix you his lips tasted like nicotine and you got addicted. “