Murdoc: “That’s it! I’m tired of you two squabbling like children! We’ve got a photoshoot to pose for, so you had better make up right this second!” Noodle: “But he started it!” Murdoc: “Oh yeah? Well I’m gonna end it! Hug and make up!” 2D: *laughing* “This is bloomin’ ridiculous! We’re adults, you can’t just–” Murdoc: “Now!” Noodle:
Title: Newlyweds Pairing: Cassian Andor x Reader Genre: Fluff, some angst Warnings: Some nudity A/N: Inspire by The Coat™
tbh. That’s the only excuse I have for this nonsense. I regret nothing
“Remind me why we couldn’t just stay in the ship?” you asked, pulling your coat tighter around your body. Dark clouds loomed above, threatening to dump a blanket of snow right on top of you at any second.
Despite his reputation as a ‘blunt instrument’, Bond is well acquainted with stealth. He knows how to blend into the surroundings or lurk, hidden just out of sight, in dark corners, ready to spend hours without moving a muscle.
He’s ready now, concealed well and patiently waiting for his perfect opportunity to come by. His muscles tense in anticipation when his target approaches; Bond watches him slip into the small room, rummage in the cupboards, take what’s needed, put everything together and then leave.
Soundlessly, Bond slips out of his hiding and follows his mark, smooth and quiet like a ghost, keeping carefully out of the line of sight. He maintains just the right distance and moves quickly, aware that every second counts before the security guards absentmindedly staring at CCTV feeds realise he’s not supposed to be heading down this corridor.
Bond knows all about stealth. Knows the difference a split second can make, knows how to walk quickly yet without making a sound, and he knows how to spot the right moment to pounce-
“Chri-ist!” the minion shrieks and jumps, barely avoiding spilling the steaming hot tea from the mug clutched in his hand. “007… what- why-”
Bond smiles, sharp like a shark, and crowds the minion, smoothly backing him up until the keycard in his lab coat pocket beeps against the scanner and the irritatingly secure door to R&D slides open.
“I’ll take it from here,” Bond says and gently lifts the precious mug out of the minion’s hand.
“B-but… the Quartermaster said you can’t-”
“That’s for me to worry about,” Bond says and saunters triumphantly in, leaving the minion squirming undecidedly behind.
R&D is always bustling with life, the electric thrill of genius and innovation always crackling in the air as ideas spark and whirl and develop all across the various sections of the vast yet cluttered space. Minor (and occasionally major) explosions and incidents can and do happen at any minute, and the fire extinguisher is in urgent use at least twice a day. Bond enjoys R&D tremendously, and therefore is quite put out whenever Q throws him out for fiddling with one too many hazardous prototypes. Apparently, warming the Quartermaster’s bed can get one only so much special treatment.
Still, sneaking his way back in is always good fun.
He locates Q almost immediately and assumes his swankiest gait as he strolls over to where he’s busy with the skeleton of a brand new motorcycle he’s working on. He’s also deliciously focused, slightly ruffled, and sporting a grease stain on his cheek. Bond wants to ruffle him even more.
Q purses his lips when he sees him.
“I thought I’d got rid of you,” he says in lieu of a loving greeting.
Bond produces his most charming smile.
“I come bearing gifts,” he offers the tea.
Q huffs but accepts the mug, peering at it snootily.
“Stolen gifts, at that.”
Bond blinks and tries to remember how to look innocent.
“Stolen?” going by the unimpressed look on Q’s face, he’s less than successful.
“I can see Marvin traumatised over there by the door. And you can’t make proper tea for shit, you coffee-drinking heathen.”
“I still brought you a gift,” Bond smiles, taking half a step closer, hands in his trouser pockets, head cocked a little to the side. Q watches him closely over the brim of the mug, and Bond rather likes his chances of being forgiven this time.
“Hmm,” Q says nothing and blows on the tea so as not to appear too yielding.
Bond waits, patient, while Q takes a tentative sip, careful not to burn his lips; Bond knows the soft midnight blue suit he’s wearing is one of Q’s favourites on him, so standing there and looking pretty seems like a good strategy. It pays off - mollified, as always, by having his tea, Q makes a sound in his throat, licks his lips as he puts the mug down on a chair (the only surface near him not cluttered with tools, wires and blueprints), and turns a slightly playful gaze on Bond. Expectant, Bond smiles just a little bit, trying to look especially charming.
“Get me some biscuits and I’ll see about letting you back in,” Q says with the air of an emperor caught on a particularly generous day.
Bond smirks victoriously and says nothing, but sends Q a very meaningful look before he turns around and sashays back out of R&D, lifting the keycard off one of the minions on his way out.
Twenty-nine minutes later he’s on his way back to R&D, carrying an elegantly wrapped box and having made truly spectacular time getting to and back from a nearby bakery Q is quite fond of. So he allows himself to look particularly smug when he re-enters R&D and marches towards Q to make a gourmet biscuit delivery.
Q pretends not to notice him, focused on some intricacies of the wiring, so Bond clears his throat, standing behind him and more than happily eyeing that pert arse presented so well on display as Q leans over the tangle of wires.
“Oh, there you are,” Q also pretends not to be impressed by the box, but Bond doesn’t miss the way his eyes brighten up. “Well,” his eyebrows twitch when he takes the box and peers inside; he’s teasingly prim and composed as always, but there’s a hint of a smile on his normally downward-dipped lips. “These might even get you permission to touch a thing or two around here.”
“Oh?” Bond flawlessly reacts to the nonchalantly dropped innuendo, smirking and smoothly moving into Q’s personal space.
“Mm,” Q puts the box down next to his tea - refilled in Bond’s absence and steaming. Then he reaches out, takes hold of Bond’s tie, and pulls him into a kiss that’s thrillingly demanding.
Bond responds immediately, settling his hands on Q’s hips and squeezing just a little when Q licks deep into his mouth. It’s not often they engage in public displays of affection, especially not around Q’s minions who already gossip enough, but every now and then Q likes to be workplace-inappropriate in front of an audience. Bond always relishes those moments.
(Q enjoys being workplace-inappropriate in private as well, especially in his office with the glass walls blacked out so no one can see them half-undressed and shagging over Q’s desk… but that’s another thing entirely.)
Q ends the kiss as demandingly as he’d initiated it and smirks at Bond, eyes glowing and full of intent behind his glasses as he smooths Bond’s tie back into place.
“Go and don’t make yourself a nuisance,” he says in his best, haughtiest Quartrmaster voice that always sends a tingle of interest right into Bond’s groin. “I’m busy. If you behave, we’ll go home early when I’m done.”
Bond’s eyes gleam.
“I’ll hold you to that.”
Bond is well acquainted with patience - when it suits him.
This started as a drabble for the 15 minute challenge by @mi6-cafe but then I liked how it turned out and decided to write more :) The prompt was ‘honey’ by the lovely @castillon02 - the prompt gave me this idea which somehow does not feature honey in any shape or form :D
I love this fan fiction so much it hurts. It’s the reason I’m able to go about my day (since I always get updates in the morning) and is the reason I can sleep well at night.
If you haven’t read it, then check it out on FF.net and go check out @tsume-yuki here on tumblr because she posts chapter previews and other pretty fan arts from fans and everything about it is just UGH so good!
I’m not saying this as advertisement, by the way. I genuinely do love everything about this woman author and her writing. It just gives me life and the inspiration to draw. <333
So like a nerd I headed straight for the Rito village for advancing the main story of the game…they’re my favorite Zelda race (BIRD PEOPLE! WINGS!!), and I love the outfit you can buy there, it’s neat and viking-esque and cute!! ;v; I couldn’t decide which color cast I liked better though, so here’s both.
I spent all this time goofing off in the wild, I just now finished my first “Divine Beast” dungeon…it was amazing, and I’m glad to see the story side of this game certainly does not disappoint! :’D
“Rawr! I am Delirious, the most vicious monster in the whole wide world!” A scrawny man in a blue hoodie spoke. His face was nearly completely hidden by a hockey mask, and he had a machete strapped to one side of his waist. The normally solid forest ground was mushy under his dark blue boots, not that it bothered him nor his partner much.
“Oh yeah? That’s why you haven’t gotten one kill, huh?” Delirious’s “partner in crime”, so to speak, teased the shorter man. The partner, better known as Cartoonz, had skin the color of blood, a missing right eye, and short, dull horns. He had a pair of bat-like wings that currently kept him aloft, dark red claws instead of fingers or toes, and a thin, razor tipped tail that only ever drooped. His clothes were loose, often ripped and dirty.
Neither were good at what they were supposed to be, but neither truly wanted to be.
“Look ‘Toonz, I need a better introduction! The last people we found laughed at me.”
“Yeah, I know. They laughed at me, too- Wait, did you hear that?” Cartoonz’s question was directed at an odd noise. It sounded both familiar, yet very different than any sound they’d heard before.
“I heard that! It sounds human!” Delirious spoke quickly, looking at his best friend. Before the conversation could continue, the mysterious noise squeaked out of a nearby bush.
“It’s coming from here. Stand back, Delirious. I’ll check it out,” Cartoonz whispered as he approached the bush. Moving carefully, he pulled the leaves to the side, revealing two small cloth bundles. He picked the noisier bundle up gently, and cautiously pulled the blanket away from the source of the noise.
“Delirious… Look at this,” Cartoonz’s voice was quiet and shaky now. Delirious crept up to his friend, and confusedly took the small bundle forced into his arms. Cartoonz then picked up the other cloth wrapped thing, and lifted the cloth away from it.
“…What is this thing, ‘Toonz?” Delirious questioned before a happy giggle floated from the bundle.
“I think it’s a little human. What were they called… 'babies’?”
“Makes sense. Hey, this little guy’s pretty cute!” Delirious smiled at the baby in his arms, which stared back at him. The baby had light blonde hair and sharp blue eyes. The other baby in Cartoonz’s arms also had blonde hair, but crisp violet eyes, rather than azure.
“Yeah, they are. Maybe we should ask the Wraith about them. He knows a lot about humans, so he’ll be able to help us take care of them,” Cartoonz offered the idea hesitantly, almost as if he was unsure. The thought that the babies would be abandoned by them was discarded by the pair before they even realized it was an option.
“Or maybe we should ask the Nurse. She should know a lot about humans from taking care of them so long, right?” Delirious pointed out as he began to walk towards a cabin. He and Cartoonz had long ago repurposed the empty house into a comfortable living space, and they both lived there.
“Yeah. Wait, we can’t tell them! If we tell them we’re taking care of humans, they’ll kill them, or they’ll tell the Entity!” Cartoonz realized, panic rushing from his words. The small babe in his arms blinked up at him and smiled, while the other just giggled and grabbed Delirious’s pointer finger.
“Not gonna happen then. Look at these two. We can’t just let them die!” Delirious agreed, allowing the baby to play with his finger until they put it in their mouth. “Ah! No! that can’t be good for you!” He yelped, pulling his finger away as the babies clapped and laughed. Cartoonz couldn’t stop his guffaws at the sight of his best friend waving a finger in front of a happy little baby.
“Well, if we’re going to take care of these two, then we should give them names, right?” The winged man questioned the other. When they finally arrived at the somewhat small log cabin they called home, they pushed the door open and stepped inside.
The living room was comfortably warm, with a pair of couches, a few chairs, and a fireplace that contained a blazing fire. There was a fluffy carpet spread on the floor, meaning no shoes were ever worn about in this room. The kitchen had a tiled floor and a small table with four chairs surrounding it. The counters were clean and the fridge was stocked. Upstairs, there were two bedrooms and a pair of bathrooms.
Delirious kicked off his shoes before stepping into the living room, cradling the child like he had done it before. A broken memory tugged at the back of his mind, but the second he payed attention to it, it was gone. He shook his head to regain focus, then spoke.
“Yeah, they gotta have names. Let’s each name one,” Delirious determined, grinning behind the mask he never took off. He plopped himself down on one of the couches, while Toonz took a seat in an armchair.
“Well, you go first then.”
At Cartoonz’s words, Delirious looked at the blonde babe who had fallen asleep in his arms moments before. “Uh… how about, uh… Wildcat? 'Cause-, 'cause he’s so fierce! Is that a good name?”
“Sounds good enough as a nickname,” Cartoonz shrugged, before turning his attention to the child in his arms who stared up at him with innocent purple eyes. “Well… what do you think of 'Bryce’?”
“Bwyce!” The babe gurgled out, beaming as they tried to say their name. “Bwyce! Bwyce!” Cartoonz felt a flash of an emotion he hadn’t felt in a long time. Pride. He lifted the baby off his lap and up so he could look them in the eyes.
“That’s right. Bryce,” Cartoonz affirmed. Bryce giggled and clapped his hands together, smiling tiredly, before he yawned and fell asleep. Delirious cooed at his partner, who’s face turned another shade darker. After a second of silence, Delirious sat up, seeming to come up with an idea.
“Alright, I’ve got it! How about 'Tyler’? 'Cause it sounds like tiger.”
“You will not let the cat thing go, huh?”
“Shush up! It’s a cool name.”
Cartoonz laughed at Delirious’s indignant response. Before they knew it, both humanoid monsters were yawning and falling asleep themselves.