May apply to Ascendant or sun as well. Aspects to the sun & Venus matter.
Self-esteem is generally fragile. They seem confident and self-assured, but on the inside, their opinion of themselves fluctuates wildly, ranging from sheer conceit to self-loathing. They need validation from others, and if they’re deprived of that, there can be a lot of anxiety surrounding their value. They judge themselves harshly and it’s difficult to recover from embarrassment.
Self-esteem is increased by victory; coming in first place or being the best; encouragement; feelings of strength, bravery, and capability; independence; proving themselves (especially to themselves); learning from mistakes/defeat.
Self-esteem is generally steady. They’re humble and down-to-earth about themselves, with a very realistic opinion of their worth. They can have difficulty with feeling secure inside in the beginning of their lives, but once they have a solid grasp on what makes them unique and valuable, nothing can shake their confidence, and they’ll seldom depend on others to define them.
Self-esteem is increased by self-acceptance; surrounding themselves with pleasant possessions & people; being spoiled/pampered; taking time to relax & replenish their energy; low stress; aesthetic beauty; feeling natural/elegant.
Self-esteem is generally erratic. Their opinion of themselves fluctuates with their mood & the context. They easily become dissatisfied with the state of themselves due to their many various interests, which leads to inconsistent admiration and consequentially inconsistent aspirations. Their confidence relies on the “facts” about their beauty, accomplishments, etc.
Self-esteem is increased by satisfying details; being able to keep up with themselves; freedom to develop & change; variety & constant stimulation; having options; engaging people; being able to express their thoughts.
Self-esteem is generally introspective. Their confidence can be unstable and inhibited, particularly when they’re young, but they tend to be more secure in themselves once they have a good awareness of their nature/identity. Their value must be discovered before they can feel or appreciate it, and it may take a long time for them to do so if they’re on their own in that endeavor.
Self-esteem is increased by support; sympathetic people; reassurance; emotional openness, catharsis; close loved ones, people who are interested in being intimate with them; positive reactions; healthy expression of self.
Self-esteem is generally glowy. They radiate confidence and pride; they’re typically secure within themselves, knowing their value & easily sharing it with others. If they doubt themselves, it’s because something external is obscuring their inner light – true self-value shines boundlessly from inside them and it’s invincible once they claim it and learn how to own it intrinsically.
Self-esteem is increased by validation; praise; attention; compliments; popularity; affection; positive, enjoyable experiences; creativity; inspiration; being received well; self-expression; grand gestures of love & adoration.
Self-esteem is generally weary. They can be extremely insecure, lacking confidence due to trying too hard to be worthy of it. They’re harshly critical of themselves and constantly strive to be beautiful and valuable, which takes its toll on their very essence – they tend to shrink further into themselves the more distance they feel stands in the way of what they intend to be.
Self-esteem is increased by making progress, noticing positive results of their efforts; good health & hygiene; appreciation; acknowledgement; feeling able, organized, and useful; being thanked; admiration; being understood.
Self-esteem is generally buoyant. Their confidence fluctuates erratically, yet gracefully; the lows are taken in stride and the highs are positively elating. They reflect the opinions of others and tend to take things very personally but they typically convince themselves that their insecurities are silly, and return to airy self-acceptance, which can easily turn into oblivious vanity.
Self-esteem is increased by acceptance; integration; inclusion; positive social interaction; peaceful bonds; being well-liked; having fashionable interests & friends; being talked about; attracting & being interesting to others; romance.
Self-esteem is generally all or nothing. They’re very cutthroat in the inner competition to be better than they used to be and they can sink into terrifying depths of self-hatred if they fail themselves. If they achieve what they aspire for, they can become obnoxiously conceited. There is rarely a balance – it goes from one extreme to the other very easily (but it’s not exactly unstable).
Self-esteem is increased by distance or extreme closeness; knowing other people intimately; being mysterious; having an impact on others; loyalty; deep connections; intensity; becoming stronger after being hurt; being guarded.
Self-esteem is generally carefree. They always try to let go of their insecurities. This often leads to arrogance and vanity, since they sometimes their desperate aversion to being weighed down by negative feelings can result in being carried away by positive ones. They tell themselves a lot of things “don’t matter” because they don’t want to face the discomfort of low self-value.
Self-esteem is increased by enjoyable distractions; trying new things; adventure; discovery; realizations; feeling wise and untamed; being free to do what they wish & make their own decisions; getting away with bad behavior.
Self-esteem is generally brutal. They lack self-compassion and they’re critical of themselves, but they’re also down-to-earth and pragmatic about their value. Self-hatred motivates them. They use their insecurities to their own advantage, to improve themselves, even if it’s unhealthy or painful. Sometimes it works too well & they become conceited. Other times, they end up hurting themselves.
Self-esteem is increased by success; accomplishments; respect; having influence and authority; being self-sufficient; solving their own problems; having answers; leading; control; wealth; being considered important.
Self-esteem is generally contrary. They’re very concerned with what they’re not and this is how they discover their value – by resisting insecurity & criticism of all kinds and trying to prove the opposite. They do this to positive things too sometimes; they’re essentially playing devil’s advocate when it comes to their value, and that’s where they find equilibrium between the inner & the outer.
Self-esteem is increased by breaking rules; being unpredictable; challenging standards & assumptions; being given the space to openly express & define themselves; changing the minds of others; inspiring others;
being a role model.
Self-esteem is generally amorphous. They vaguely absorb both positive and negative perspectives on who they are, and the result is fluid confidence that relies on their emotional state (and the emotional states of those who surround them). They’re typically unaware of the “truth” about themselves so they never feel secure in any opinion they form about their worth/beauty/etc.
Self-esteem is increased by fantasy; absorbing positivity; devotion; sacrifice; powerful emotional experiences & connections; artistic expression; mutual reflection of beauty; being explained; poetic love, “magical” relationships.
Aries: light shoulder punches, defending your honor, inviting you out often
Taurus: paying for a meal, giving back rubs, working hard for you Gemini: sweet indirects, remembering your favorites, making something creative for you Cancer: small surprise gifts, planning ahead for days together, telling you about themself Leo: getting dressed to impress, bragging about you to others Virgo: sharing good books, making dinner, telling you their hidden secrets Libra: giving out their Tumblr, goofy smiling as soon as they see you, taking your side in an argument address, Scorpio: hugs from behind, getting vengeance for you, sharing their insecurities Sagittarius: flowers, no holding back their laugh, goading you into doing something crazy for thrills Capricorn: compliments, texting you often, telling you all their fun facts Aquarius: sharing their conspiracies, opening up to you with their emotions, believing in you Pisces: kisses on the cheek, telling you their wildest dreams, imagining being together and growing old
Aries: They are all about the romance and the passion. As long as you never get bored of them, they’ll love you to death. They share a lot of inside jokes and love being goofy together.
Taurus: Besides the comfort and the reliance in the relationship, they will take pleasure in those little moments that you share together, those brief moments of physical contact when your hands brush against each other. Doesn’t hurt to share some similar interests with each other.
Gemini: It’s in the little things. The bright smile. That look of adoration. That little way your eyes move to the left every time you tell a white lie. These mean a lot to them.
Cancer: They don’t want you to share their interests, they want you to be able to respect and understand these interests. Once they realise you can be trusted, they’ll let themselves fall in love and give all of their heart.
Leo: They want someone who can show their love, display it. Show them you mean it, show them that you’re not faking, they want to know, but they can only realise it when you show them in bold, obvious ways. Don’t be too subtle, just flood them with your love.
Virgo: They don’t want extravagant displays of your love, for they feel that you’re flaunting them. They want it in the details, in the small things you do for them, the subtle ways you convey it. Be romantic, be genuine, but above all, be sincere.
Libra: Tell them you mean it. Don’t be afraid to speak up and tell them anything and everything. They like to share and be a part of your life too. They want to know your day, your successes, your problems and live them with you.
Scorpio: They don’t need romance, they need to know that your love is heartfelt. They need to be able to trust you, to know that you won’t hurt them, and once they do, they’ll go all out to show it.
Sagittarius: They want you to understand their flaws and quirks. They want you to respect them. They want you to be able to be with you through all the ups and downs of life. They’ll know that you want to be with them.
Capricorn: They want someone who they can be comfortable with, show their true self, the self that has all the quirks and fun and humour and hidden qualities. Few people make them feel that way.
Aquarius: They want someone who they can hold a meaningful conversation with. They’ll rarely waste their time with someone who doesn’t put themselves in it, like engage in the moment.
Pisces: Don’t be a liar. Don’t be a faker. Don’t break their heart. They want someone who can understand their emotional changes and go along with it. They want someone who can be by their side at the worst of times. They want someone who they can entrust their secrets with.
Aries: Super protective over their partner. They want to show them their favorite movies, books, movies, everything. They will also show their S.O. off to every friend and stranger, but in moderation as they get jealous easily. There’s a lot of verbal expression as well about how awesome they think their partner is.
Taurus: They are pretty emotionally involved in relationships, they want to be good enough for their S.O. Taurus will want to be in your headspace often and can get pretty chatty when they think you are losing interest. They also go to their partner for validation, and want to be their S.O.’s punching bag when things get rough in their separate life. Taurus yearns for understanding and therapy in a relationship.
Gemini: Gemini shows you off the second they get, but not as if you are just another prize, they want you to feel like a queen constantly fawned over. They will pay just the right amount of attention to you, and make up creative dates. Gemini will take you hiking to paint murals on cave walls and then to a quaint coffee shop for breakfast.
Cancer: Will love you a long time. They are pretty mainstream in their dating style. They will make you their every Instagram appreciation post and put your couples selfy on Christmas cards. Cancer is very cheesy in relationships and will want to make lemonade after a good hike when it is warm and drink hot chocolate and watch romances when it gets cold.
Leo: Leo will pay so much attention to you in a relationship. They tend to be on the shy side though, as they don’t like their ego to be wounded. When they are into you, you know it. They are intense and passionate, but not always in a physical way, they are just extremely expressive people. Leo will teach you how to dance and tell you about sweet dreams they have about you.
Virgo: They can be very challenging in relationships, because of their intelligence. They will have deep conversations with you about anything under the sky and constantly throw out little tests in the relationship to see if you can keep up. Virgo will show you their dorky, cute side and make you watch their favorite movies and show you their playlist they made for you.
Libra: When Libra really likes you, they will be understanding and patient with your every move. They are pretty protective, but not in the way that they don’t want others to look at you (they like to think that you will be forever loyal) but more in the way that they don’t want anyone to offend you. Libra will spend hours on the phone or on skype with you and write countless letters. In your time spent together they will always make you breakfast.
Scorpio: Scorpio will be incredibly different from the rest in a relationship. They want to be around you all the time, but they will never show it or tell you it. They are very expressive through sex and other physical touch. Scorpio will listen to your problems and will give you the advice to stay safe. They want to fuck until 3 AM and watch movies with you the rest of the time.
Sagittarius: They will talk all night with you about good memories, friends, and their dreams. They want to take you on adventures and take pictures to document it all. Sagittarius will make you coffee at 3 in the morning to keep the story going and drive down long highways playing heartfelt music the whole drive. They can be selfish sometimes when they always chose what date to go on, but they will stop to ask you what you want sometimes.
Capricorn: Capricorn tend to be traditionalists. They will start out in the talking stage, but will move fast to movies, dinner out, and holding hands often. Capricorn want to kiss you in the rain and turn the fire on for you to warm you up. They will take you to cozy little restaurants and to their friends’ parties on weekends. Capricorn will spend a lot of money on you.
Aquarius: Aquarius will make you their favorite person and will teach you things no one else knows about the world. They will be resourceful and can put a smile on your face with sheer effort and positivity. Aquarius will let their creativity flow free around you and will try to make every experience fun and eventful.
Pisces: They will be very sweet and affectionate to you. They want to keep you around and will spend Sundays watching movies and making you food. In relationships Pisces can be very wholesome people and will listen to your beliefs and will follow in your footsteps. They will draw your picture and put you in their stories, keeping you forever.
Aries: you’re feisty and confident and loud but also ridiculously naive and quite childish. your smile is blinding and you’re fiercely protective of your friends and would go to the ends of the world for their sake. i like you. although i wish you’d learn to read situations and be more tactful, i admire your sincerity and honesty. you’re refreshingly genuine.
Taurus: you’re so hard on yourself, it’s as if you’ve put a boulder on your chest and refuse to take it off. you don’t need to handle all this pressure, but you put in on yourself anyway, and are incredibly stubborn about it. it’s okay to relax and enjoy yourself. being alive is not a punishment. you’re so much happier when unrestricted by worries; know that you don’t need to handle everything alone.
Gemini: you’re intelligent and very talkative with those whose company you enjoy. you want someone who’ll click and can engage you in conversation, whether intellectual or random. you’re so used to changing yourself to suit other people’s tastes that you aren’t sure how to be yourself anymore; to you, all of those personalities somehow seemed like genuine sides of yourself.
Cancer: you’re always so friendly and welcoming and kind with everyone, but at the same time, you always felt very distant to me. part of me feels like i wrongfully infringed on your personal space by trying to get closer, even though that’s not the case. from time to time i feel like i can see glimpses of your true feelings, but it always disappears back into a facade just as i notice.
Leo: you’re kind and helpful– and cheerful, to some extent. you really like attention. some of you are lowkey about it and some of you have zero subtlety about it, but regardless, you want to be recognized for your hard work and efforts. you feel overshadowed by people who are better than you and want to improve yourself, but may feel lost sometimes as to how to get there.
Virgo: you’re so stubborn, hardworking, and determined; i’m not sure if it’s frightening or annoying. it’s also a huge pain in the neck to argue with you because you firmly believe that your views are The Right Ones and completely disregard any arguments against it. you’re organized and neat and intelligent. i understand your feelings to some level, but i wish you were more open-minded.
Libra: you’re not a bad person, but you’re not exactly morally upstanding, either. and that comes from your ability to see situations from all sides. it’s a bit infuriating trying to ask your opinion on things because of this; you see and understand all views and end up confused and unable to decide. you’re good with people but tend to hold most of them at a distance to avoid getting hurt.
Scorpio: you have a wild sense of humor and are rather sarcastic, but it’s mostly there to cover up your insecurities and feelings. you’re passionate but try to keep it subdued (and it works quite well, if i’m honest). it’s alright to have feelings. i don’t know exactly who hurt you in the past, but you don’t need to hide your emotions behind a quirky persona. it’s okay to let it out and just be.
Sagittarius: you’re very sarcastic and funny and sometimes just plain mean on the outside, but you’re so sweet and gentle and kind on the inside; the contrast always makes me melt a little. you’re quite intelligent and try to see the bright side even if it’s hard. you don’t like sharing personal information or revealing how you feel easily. you genuinely care for your friends and want to help them.
Capricorn: i worry about you. you’re hardworking and diligent but somehow lazy at the same time. you’re also hard on yourself and have deep insecurities and strong feelings about things that you hide rather than open up about. you’re bitingly sarcastic and i love your sense of humor. you’re also incredibly kind to others, which can hurt you when others don’t show you the same kindness.
Aquarius: flighty. you’re kind and compassionate on the outside but hold a deeply-rooted bitterness within you. i dislike how you always blame everyone but yourself for your own problems, especially when they could be easily resolved if you simply lightened up a bit. part of me wonders if you care more about global and societal issues because you don’t know how to deal with the personal ones.
Pisces: you’re passionate and emotionally fragile, though experience has taught you to hide it behind walls. when you love, it’s with full force and zero inhibitions; that’s why you get hurt so easily. you’re not easy to understand and people have ostracized you because they misinterpret your words or actions. i feel sorry for you, but at the same time i know that misguided pity is the last thing you want.