love and stress

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Day and Night

“when in distress, draw a dude in a dress” is what i always say

and man a lot of you have been mentioning me on this post and the first time i saw it i fell in love but before drawing yuuri in that dress i had to find something for viktor and lo and behold i found this on my dash

How to Tell Your Friend That You Need a Break From Supporting Them

When I worked at a mental health crisis centre, I couldn’t believe how many people came to us, not because of their own problems, but because they were so lost in a friend’s pain that they couldn’t take it anymore. I saw a lot of people who were so worn down from helping someone else that they couldn’t sleep, eat, socialize or focus at work or school. They were consumed with guilt every time they put down their phones, went to sleep, or dared to enjoy themselves and have a good time. All because they had no idea how to set boundaries. 

Helping your friends through a tough situation is a wonderful and noble thing to do, but it only works if you’re mentally in a place to do so. If you’re dealing with issues or mental illness of your own, you’re not always capable of being someone else’s shoulder to cry on 24/7. And that’s okay. Sometimes, you have to put yourself first. You can’t help someone else if you’re a mess yourself. You can’t save a drowning person with a sinking ship. 

Telling a friend that you’re overwhelmed and you need a break is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. Honesty is the best policy - don’t go radio silent on them, or avoid answering their messages. Be honest about how you’re feeling, and what you need from them. If you’re stuck on what to say and how to start the conversation, here are a few suggestions. Feel free to copy them exactly:

It’s really hard for me to admit this, but I’ve been feeling like I’m on the verge of a breakdown lately. I love you and I care about you, but I need to take some time to take care of myself for a while. 

I’m really concerned about you, but I honestly don’t know how to deal with this and I’m worried I’ll say the wrong thing. I really think that you should talk to a professional about this. 

This is hard for me to admit, but I have a lot going on in my life right now, and it’s getting to be too much for me. Would it be okay if we talked about lighter stuff for the next little while?

You deserve more support than I can give you. I think you need to tell a close family member or professional about what’s going on. 

It seems like every time we talk about this, things are worse for you. I’m worried that my advice isn’t helping you at all, and I think you should talk to someone more qualified than me. 

I’m really worried for your safety, and it breaks my heart, but I can’t keep you safe all by myself. Would it be okay if we told someone else what was going on? 

I’m sorry, but I can’t answer my text messages 24 hours per day. I really want to make sure that you always have someone to turn to if I’m not available. Are there some other people you would trust with this? I can help you tell them, if you’re not comfortable doing it by yourself. 

I hope these suggestions are helpful - best of luck to all of you, and make sure to put your own mental health first when you have to. 

I.. I don’t even know if i should could translate this :D

He just kinda swears in Russian (meaning something like “Well that’s just great”, “What am i going to do with you now?”)

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Don’t be so hard on yourself. It’s okay to rest :))

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i’ve been waiting to draw this for weeks now

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smile!

just quickly slapped some color on a sketch lolol >_< 

don’t repost / reuse / re-edit.

@cymfh asked me to be in a contest for their wonderful fic, so i elected to do a piece based off ch 33 in which things get a little heated!

(i might have missed the deadline i think, but this was fun either way!)

Small tips that make a (healthier) difference

Hey you! I dare you to try your best to follow this checklist tomorrow! But hey! Not so fast. Why not try it again the next day (and every day after that)? Sometimes it’s the smaller changes that can in fact help improve our health and wellbeing, especially when we think we’re short of time. School stressing you out? Everything is going to be ok. Try a few little things here. Tick everything off that you completed! Tell me how it goes for you!

This was a spontaneous post and I’ve found that I’ve been making errors in my posts recently! Plz correct me bc I am an egg. Hope u like it anyway.


Morning:

  • Wake up as soon as you do naturally or when your alarm goes off. Make your bed! Open the blinds!
  • Get out of bed and s t r e t c h – all the way from the very tips of your fingers to the tips of your toes. (Trust me, this feels good)
  • Set your intention for the day. This might be weird for some, but try it. Example: Today I will be productive. I will be focused on my tasks and I will take the time to relax when needed. It doesn’t have to be as complicated – Example 2: I can do this. Remind yourself again.
  • Eat breakfast. A MUST. Try my favourite: eggs (poached, scrambled or fried) on toast with avocado or baked beans. Yes. We are on a roll today.
  • Drink one full glass of water within the hour of waking (don’t down it all in one go though!).
    • Add 1/8 of a lemon to this. Lemon is great to alkalise the body and getting that digestive system of yours goin! This will flush out toxins in the body and support your immune system too!
      • Side note: Wait half an hour before brushing your teeth after this (or maybe do it before) because lemons are acidic after all and can probably do some damage to your shiny whites.
  • Try having a water bottle by your bedside and beside you throughout the day as a constant reminder to drink water as you see it. Trust me, this has helped improve my water intake a lot.
  • Organise your day. What are your plans? What are of priority and what are not? Try brain dumping this, and then organising each task/item into a list, categorised in importance. This will help decrease stress throughout the day and easy referral back to this list.
  • Dress in some lovely clothes! Your fave sweater and some cool black tights? 100%!! What about that pretty skirt you like with a nice top? HECK YEAH!!!

Midday:

  • Lunchtime! Eat again. Wholesome foods are an absolute must whenever you can.
  • Aim for 3-4 cups of water by lunchtime (inclusive of the glass of lemon water you had this morning).
  • Remember that intention you set this morning? Say it again.
  • Throw a compliment at someone. Be genuine. This will have a butterfly effect. If someone throws one at you to – don’t disagree! Say thank you. You rock, don’t doubt that.
  • Are there any ticks beside those tasks on your checklist from this morning? I hope so!
  • Throw in a random burst of exercise! In public too – who cares! Pick one of these: 50 starjumps! 3 sets of 10 squats! A quick walk around outdoors!

Arvo (/Afternoon… Straya):

  • Hit that 3pm slump? Same. Here are a few ideas to get you going, especially coming home from a long day:
    • NAP! 15-20 mins. No longer. No less. Be strict here or your sleep pattern might go funny and we don’t want that. (And groggy headaches are gross)
    • Exercise! This is so fundamental to our health and wellbeing. Try out short pilates videos (no equipment) here (that as living proof, work) or some really cool yoga videos here, here, and here. Yoga is great. Try this daily. Or take a brisk walk for 30 minutes  = wake up your brain, pick up your mood AND burn some fat. C’mon, go get your shoes!
    • Have a healthy snack, such as those listed in this great post by @tbhstudying. Get your brain and bod going, my friends!
  • Write down your to do list for any work, study or event related things that you need to complete this afternoon. Set out all your equipment, sort out your papers from the day and get organised!
  • Clear your (bedroom/bed/desk/floor/work/closet) space for 5 minutes every day. I’m guessing that you’ve started to pile a few things here like I do. This will save you time and help maintain cleanliness, staving away from the complicated stress that comes from having to reorganise just about everything which we all know to hate when we’re busy with other things.
  • Have you had your 5th and 6th cups of water of the day yet? Get to it!
  • Sit up straighter and you’ll look more confident and feel more confident. Your back will also be very grateful for this.

Night:

  • Continue all your extra to-dos. Get this done. You can do it!
  • Make sure to put something in your body guys. I’m talking food here by the way… don’t let that sentence mislead you! This is especially important for those of you probably thinking “I’ll just eat later” or “I’m not hungry”.  Eat. EAT NOW. PleASE.
  • Spend some quality time with your family. How’s their day been? Tell them about yours too.
  • Glasses of water No. 7, 8 and beyond should be here.
  • Prep your meals, lists, notes, outfits, etc. for the next day. Getting these things sorted now will help you get it out of the way and save you time!
  • Settle down a little. It’s time to wiiiind doooooooownnn. Read a book. Scroll through Tumblr (aaayeee!) – but not too deep into the pits okay guys. Watch a little TV.
  • I know a lot of posts say to switch off 1-2 hours before bed. If you’re literally glued to your electronics, try switching off 5 minutes earlier every day and replace that with something else. What about doing your prep items for the next day (listed two points back!!)? Or, do get those pesky chores out the way.
    • Side note: Cleaning your room often will help freshen it, get rid of itchy dust and decrease the chances of bugs and other smol random things to crawl around your room. (If that’s not a little motivation then I’m not sure what is…). It’ll also keep your space maintained so you don’t have to do it all at once. *Shudders* Plus the likelihood of those gross germs from the world hanging around and building up in there is a no-no.
  • Sleep! 7-8 hours. Your body will thank you for it. CRUCIAL for healthy brain and body function. Plus your mood and skin will improve (i.e. gOODBYE EYEBAGS and hELLO GLOWING SKIN).
    • Side note: I see you reading this at 12am when you should be sleeping. I see you.

I hope this has helped you guys a little or at least inspired you to make a small change to your daily routine! Try doing a few items here (e.g. glass of lemon water, sitting up straighter, 8+ cups of water) and record this on a habit tracker! The smallest changes often have the greatest effects!

Don’t forget to let me know how you go.

Kalyisah (@studywithkal)

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all of you, keep your eyes forward. i’ll guard your backs. ins.

Most Likely to be Stressed About...

Work: Virgo, Capricorn, Gemini

Relationships: Libra, Scorpio, Cancer, Pisces, Leo

Missed Opportunities: Aquarius, Aries, Taurus, Sagittarius

Take a minute

Dear everyone who’s extremely stressed with whatever work you may have right now,
I love you and I feel you. You are strong and you can do this and when you do it will feel so amazing. You have a beautiful brain and the things you can do are absolutely astonishing. I know you can do this, keep going and you’ll get there. I love you so much

Love,
Someone like you