Our party found a sidequest to kill a banshee in a church. Our necromancer gave us all earplugs before we went in.

DM: you don’t see anything except a rundown church as you enter.
Me (Bard): is there an organ inside?
DM: yes there is.
Me: I’m gonna play it.
DM: before you even get close to it, you hear-
All: we don’t hear
DM: you SEE the keys of the organ moving in a -what the bard can tell- is a beautiful but haunting melody. You do not see anything else though.
Me: I join in to duet with the banshee.
DM: (laughing) okay roll performance.
Me: crit 20.

The DM is laughing really hard by this point.

DM: okay so the banshee stops playing and starts up again, but as you are playing, roll wisdom…
Me: crit 1…
DM: (laughing even harder but a lottle evilly) okay… so.. as you’re playingyou feel an icy grasp on your neck and your earplugs suddenly come out… roll constitution…
Me: 23
DM: take 9 damage, everyone roll initiative

I get highest initiative, so I go first.

Me: I cast mending on my earplugs, and I play a jazzy shanty using my middle fingers and flip her off
DM: she really hates you…

Burden of Proof

Word Count: 2357

Request: “ Thought; spontaneously dragging Steve of Bucky into random makeout sessions throughout the day and then just leaving him out of breath as you continue in with your business” And a very pleasant thought it is. 

Warning: Language, making out, and utter ridiculousness

A/N: I had more free time than I anticipated, so you’re getting this early. You have the snow storm to thank for this nonsense.

Steve Version

Originally posted by itsjustmycrazyvibe

“Ow ow ow ow ow!” you groaned through clenched teeth as Natasha dragged you through the halls and over the bodies of the incapacitated Hydra agents.

“Hush! There could still be some stragglers hanging around,” she hissed at you, readjusting her hold in order to pull you along more quickly.

“Well if you hadn’t been there to pull me out of the way, that delightful bullet would have definitely silenced me for good. You have only yourself to blame.”

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GOT7 REACTS TO: Finding hickies on their necks

Anon Asked:  Got7 reaction when they see hickey’s on their neck from the last night…😉😉

Literally just about every got7 request is sexual. you guys are nASTEE - Admin Dayna


The long lean string bean is a little (a lottle) embarrassed. He’s not necessarily ashamed of it, but feels awkward when it darkens or is in a spot that can easily be noticed by others. 

Mark tries extra hard to wear clothes that’ll cover it up. Sometimes, he traces his fingers over the hickie and thinks about the night before and his ears will get all red. For the most part he looks calm and collected - nobody suspects their bean is a siNNER.

Originally posted by j-miki


Doesn’t give an actual fuck. He gave a fuck - that’s how the hickie got there (huehuehuehue) but he isn’t going to go out his way to pretend it isn’t a thing. If people see, they see. If he happens to be doing an interview, he’d cover it up with makeup - just to avoid any scandals or rumors - but for the most part… he sees it, smirks, and forgets about it as the day goes on.

Originally posted by magiccastles


You thought his head was big already???





He spots it while brushing his teeth in front of the bathroom mirror, and his face lights up. Jackson will waste no time whatsoever to take pictures of the multiple hickies across his neck, chest, and shoulders to then send to you.

“Look what you’ve done to me, jagi.”

“You think I can step out like this?”

“I made you cum and you repay me like this?”

Originally posted by xingxing-boazi


He notices it just before stepping out the bathroom to leave with the boys to meet up with JYP. Jinyoung does a very theatrical double take - swore he gave himself whip lash - and stared at his neck in the mirror, noticing the darkening hickie just above his shoulder blade. 

For a second he’s prideful, remembering how much “fun” you two had last night, but after hearing Jackson yell at him to get out the bathroom, he realizes if he doesn’t hurry and cover it up he’s kinda fucked…

Originally posted by jypnior


Super doop embarrassed lil kiddo. 

Youngjae didn’t even know where it came from at first. He just stares at his phone screen with the front facing camera angled at the hickie for him to check out what was hurting him so much. He sees the bruise at first and thinks “where tf did that come from?” but then your name pops up on the screen to notify him of a text and the memories floOD IN.

He’s going to wear modest clothing and cover it up until it disappears. He honestly isn’t looking forward to the teasing from his hyungs.

Originally posted by yjarssunshine


Convinces himself he doesn’t care and gets all prideful. Doesn’t even attempt to hide it. In fact, he purposely wore a v-neck just to show it off and act cool about it. But when Jackson points it out and the group roast commences, BamBam is feeling REAL regret - but still hella prideful.

Like okay, yeah you tried to suck the soul out his neck but like… but at least he got some succ so what’s really good, Jackson?

Originally posted by chattyang


Steals BamBam’s concealer within the minute he catches sight of the hickie. Yugyeom will honestly be distracted throughout the entirety of the day, checking if the hickie shows on any reflective surface and getting a little flustered when doing so because he just can’t get the image of you from last night out his head -

He isn’t at all ashamed about the hickie… it’s just… Muva Jinyoung won’t approve…

Originally posted by chichangyu