lots of feels with these two


Wednesday and Amelia are officially owners of their very own townhouse! 💛🌱

No String Attached: Pt. 2

Pairing: Kol x Reader (Ft. Rebekah & Freya)

Warnings: Used a lot of gifs because why not.

Word Count: 1994

PART ONE | PART THREE (coming soon!)

(Two Weeks Later…)

This whole joyride and no strings attached thing with Kol has been fun. But, something has happened that you never planned on letting happen ever. You’ve been thinking about it for a few days now, allowing yourself enough time to put some thought into it that you surprisingly started gaining feelings for Kol. You don’t know how it happened, but it just did. 

Seeing couples do romantic things made a part of you wish you had something like that with Kol. Even when you were at the beach with him, you noticed a girl check out his perfect abs and that made you a little jealous. You couldn’t allow these feelings to stay with you any longer so you insisted on putting this to an end by having a talk with him about it today.

You texted him to meet you at the Mystic Grill and that’s exactly what he did.

You sat at a booth and scrolled through your iPhone to kill time. Once Kol arrived, he scanned around until he finally saw you and sat across from you. “What do I owe the pleasure, darling?”

You set your phone down on the table and rested your elbows on the table. “Well let me just get straight to the point. This thing we have going on. I have to put it to an end.”

“And why’s that? Not that I mind. But I’m curious.” Kol furrowed his brows.

“I kind of want to start dating again.” You couldn’t face telling him how you really feel because you wanted to spare yourself the pain of hearing him say he doesn’t feel the same. Plus, you know that in time, your feelings for him will start to fade. So, you came up with that lie.

Kol stifled a laugh. “Dating? Funny. Last I heard, you wanted to be for a long while.”

“Correct. But I, I’ve changed my mind Kol.” You leaned back, crossing your arms.

“I suppose.” Kol uttered. “Well, it was quite fun while it lasted.”

(The following day…)

Today you, Kol, Rebekah and Freya made plans to go clubbing because why not. You brought a change of clothes and your makeup so that you can get ready with the girls at their place.

After finishing on your makeup, you go to the bathroom to change into your outfit for tonight. Walking out, Kol appears, making you jump from surprise. “Dammit Kol!” You punched him in the chest, but that didn’t phase him whatsoever because original vampire strength and all.

Kol let out a laugh. “Frightened much?” He gave you an elevator look as you were walking down the hall. “Hey hey!” He hurried to stop you.

“What?” You questioned him.

“What in the devil are you wearing?” He gave you a disgusted look, but you continued to walk back to the room that Rebekah and Freya are in.

“Um clubbing attire?” You looked at Rebekah, hoping she would back you up.

“More like slutty attire.” Kol blurted as he was walking around the room confidently. He wasn’t a fan of your outfit at all, but you didn’t care.

“Oh shut it, Kol.” Rebekah said half-aloud, shooting a stank eye at Kol, then gave you a wink.

“If it was Elijah that made a remark about my outfit, that makes sense. But Kol Mikaelson out of all people?” You stated while you sat on the edge of the bed to put on your heels.

“Seeing that you’re neither Elijah, nor her boyfriend. You can keep your mouth shut.” Freya added as she was putting on her lipstick.

“Whatever. No matter. I’ll be downstairs.” Kol snarled then went on his way.

“That was-” You said, then Freya finished for you. “Uncomfortable.”

“Just give Kol a blood bag and he’ll be back to being dandy.” Rebekah stated.

(15 minutes later…)

The four of you took a cab to the club so that you all can drink and have a good time.

Arriving there, the music was bumpin and it was pretty packed. But not to the point where people are shoulder to shoulder just yet.

Thankfully, Kol was in a better mood which made everyone feel at ease because nobody likes a Debbie downer.

The first thing that the four of you did was go to the bar and ordered a round of shots that Kol paid for.

“Alright. I’m ready for another!” You had a long week of work so you needed it. Plus, the thought of having to cut yourself off from having sex for a long while was a little saddening.

“I’ll pass on this one. I’m going to use the loo.” Kol said in a loud tone because of the loud music. Before going to the bathroom, he bent down to your ear. “Here’s my card.” Kol pulled his card out, handing it to you. “Order whatever you like.”

“Um okay? Are you sure?” You questioned Kol. What’s it to him right now? He must’ve felt bad for talking down on you about your outfit, so this could be his way of apologizing. Instead of Kol answering your question, he left to the bathroom.

“Y/N! Here! Here!” Freya nudged at your arm to get your attention, handing you your shot. Everything was happening so fast left and right.

“Cheers!” Rebekah shouted excitedly.

“To us!” You added as you raised your shot glass. The three of you tapped your glasses and chugged your shot, letting the dark liquor shoot down your throat. Afterwards, you all slammed the shot glasses on the bar counter.

“Come on. Let’s go dance guys.” Freya grabbed Rebekah’s hand, then reached hers out for you to grab hers but you declined.

“I’ll wait here for Kol to get back, then we’ll meet back up with you guys.”

Rebekah shrugged her shoulders, then her and Freya danced their way to the dance floor. Seeing how eager they were to have fun made you smile. You called for the bartender to order yourself a mixed drink with Kol’s card.

Your drink is in hand and all paid for. Kol finally arrives back from the bathroom. “Took you long enough. We’re you going number 2 or something?” You teased.

“You’re a funny one, aren’t you.” Kol grinned and  leaned over to sip out of the straw, chugging almost half of your drink. You look at him with wide eyes and he pulls back. “Ah.”

“That’s my favorite song!” You squealed, then grabbed Kol’s hand and rushed over to the dance floor to find his sisters so that you all can dance together.

The club got a little more packed compared to when you first arrived which made it even harder to find them. But to the hell with it. You didn’t want to miss out dancing to your favorite song, plus you were buzzing so you stuck with just Kol for now. He’s not a high maintenance person when it comes to a night out, so he was always down to do whatever.

You were feeling yourself as you were dancing to the song with Kol. He gazed at you, but you were too caught up in the moment to notice. Then, as you were swaying your hips to the rhythm, he thought it was appropriate to brush his hands along your waist. 

You were puzzled as to why Kol was getting all touchy-feely since you just recently had a talk with him about not messing around anymore. Maybe the alcohol was getting to him, but you couldn’t help by allow him to. And god damn, the alcohol was definitely getting to you though because you were so tempted to lock lips with him.

Your arms were now sloppily around his neck as the two of you danced together, faces also started getting closer, but once the song changed, you quickly snapped out of it. That’s also when you finally spotted Rebekah and Freya. You can see their heads peaking up trying to look for you and Kol. “Hey!” You called out. Thankfully you caught their attention and they scurried over.

“Oh thank heavens. We were looking for you two!” Rebekah blurted. It was obvious she was a little drunk. Same with Freya, because you could see a drunk looking smirk on her face. All you could think about right now is how annoyed Klaus is going to be when Rebekah and Freya’s drunkasses make a ruckus at home, which is quite hilarious actually.

“Same, sister.” Kol smiled as he shook his head at his drunk sisters.

You were already feeling good and figured you deserved another drink. “I’ll be back guys. I’m gonna go buy a drink.” You said.

“Let me go with you!” Freya started walking towards the bar, but you stopped her before she could pass you.

“Um I don’t think so.” You laughed at how she couldn’t even walk a straight line. “I think you’ve had enough, Freya.” You definitely get your tolerance from your dad because you’re not even close to being drunk yet. She didn’t take it personal, so she stayed behind with her siblings.

The bar area was pretty packed now, so you waited your turn for the bartender to ask for your drink. While you’re waiting, you can see a man just a few feet from you shooting you a look from the corner of your eye. He couldn’t have been more discreet about it. “Hey beautiful.” He said to you, revealing a grin.

“Oh hey there.” You responded with a sweet smile. The stranger definitely was good looking, you couldn’t lie to yourself about that.

“I’m Darrell. What’s your name?” He puts his hand out to shake yours.

“Y/N.” You shook Darrell’s hand.

“How about I buy you a drink Y/N.”

“Uh sure. Thanks.” No harm, no foul. It’s not like you’re planning on going home with the guy. So if you wanted to flirt, you’re going to flirt. Plus, you even noticed a couple of girls here and there check out Kol.

You and Darrell we’re only having small talk, but right before he hands you the drink he bought you, Kol comes from out of the blue. “That won’t be necessary.”

You grimaced. “Kol, what are you-” 

“Oh shit. I’m sorry, I didn’t know you have a boyfriend.” Darrell apologizes.

You let out a fake laugh. “I don’t actually.”

“Tell me, who is this wanker?” Kol mean mugs the hell out of Darrell, making him feel extremely awkward.

“Here. Just take it. It’s no problem.” Darrell attempts to hand you your drink, but Kol blocks the way with his body, standing right between you two.

“Why don’t you sod off.” Kol said, compelling him. Darrell willingly walked away, leaving with both drinks.

“What the hell was that?” You grabbed Kol’s forearm to turn his view to you.

“It’s best you don’t know.” Kol responded without looking you in the eye while he walked towards the front door instead of to his sisters. They were too caught up in dancing they didn’t seem to care where their brother decided to wander off to.

“Is he like a vampire or something, buying me a drink in an attempt to kidnap me?” You scowled at Kol and of course, he ignored you. He even walked out the door without holding it open for you. 

Once you reached outside, he was no where in sight. You figured he vampire sped to get away from you. Very mature. 

Kol owes you answers for basically ruining your night because you weren’t even able to dance the night away with Rebekah and Freya like you planned in your head.

Your mind was telling you to go back inside and let him be so that you can have fun, but you know it’ll just end up consuming you throughout the night. So instead, you called a cab to take you back to the Mikaelson compound, where you know Kol left off to.

TAGS: @noisyinfluencerstrawberry @mikealsonlover @belalugosisdead @allison-rosewood-maximoff @lauren-novak @i-just-feel-gr3at

anonymous asked:

I feel like there's a lot of miscommunication between us and 1DHQ, we should just be honest and come to some sort of agreement like: if you end bg we'll all pretend Larry broke up for two whole weeks! If you end Elounur on the same day we'll act make it three!

Hahahahah. I think this is a good deal, we should try it!!

@ morons, here it is

(not sure that addressing someone as a moron before signing a deal is a good way to go,though, mmm)

@1dhq here it is


crystalclodbender  asked:

How did your parents feel about you going into comics?

I’m fortunate enough to have very supportive parents. I know not everyone does, and that’s heartbreaking. I think a lot of parents are somewhere in between the two extremes, where they care about their kids but it comes out as “I want you to have a roof over your head so go do something more sensible”.

I think mine did worry at times, but the only time I remember them saying anything is one time when they suggested I do some pretty paintings of countryside and sheep as they might sell easier! That said, knowing the financial realities of working in comics as I now do, if I had kids who wanted to go into it, I’d worry a bit too. Mostly I’d just want to make sure they knew they would probably have to jigsaw together a career from a lot of different income sources, and that they might have to work unrelated jobs here and there. I’d try my best to remember that their career and life would, of course, be different from mine!

Haha, we didn’t tell them! At least, not at first—making a webcomic for us definitely began as a hobby that just so happened to become our job, and when we first started out we’d never imagined it could become anything but a hobby.

We really only had the conversation once we were talking about things like starting a Kickstarter, printing our first book, offering to buy siblings pizza in exchange for helping us pack backer rewards—things like that. I think when we did begin to talk about it with them they were understandably a little nervous – and I don’t think they 100% understand what the job entails even today. I think any art career has the potential to scare a parent about how supportive or stable it’s going to be in the long run, so open and honest communication (and accepting that someone may still not totally understand despite being generally proud of you) is key.

I will say, however, that despite becoming very supportive over the years, my mom still refuses to read any of our stuff. She says she ends up reading all the word bubbles in my voice, and it freaks her out! J


Here’s some other shots on the design/size difference between the two episodes. Figured there’d be a perspective thing brought up so I grabbed a few shots (specifically her hand next to Yellow Pearl). 

Characters fluctuate in size in shows (though SU does it a lot more often) to create a feel, show their vulnerability/strength, or to really boot in some perspective. 

Even in these specific shots the Pearls change sizes throughout but they keep the same /general/ size. Peridot usually stays in the same size range as well, but the difference between these two episodes in particular is quite a contrast.

I mean I don’t have a problem with it, I just figured I’d point out that Peridot isn’t the only one, or in some cases the worst one, to change in size.

All in all it seems, comparing shots of Greg with the Diamonds and the Pearls with Greg, that Pearls ARE relatively hand sized since Blue Pearl and Pearl both are around the same height as him, and he fits snuggly in Blue Diamonds Hand.

Also here’s the design change between Yellow Diamond in the episodes since a lot of people latched onto that as well.

Sorry for the shitty quality I don’t have good internet and I don’t feel like waiting 80 years for a post about cartoon rock sizes lol

I didn’t think the original post would get as much traction as it did, I only have like 15 followers, so I figured I’d make this to round it out.

Katrina at hvff Chicago

First off I told her she sounds so much different than Nyssa and that she’s so bubbly and Nyssa is so serious. And she said, “I know!! She never smiles. Well, she did once but her face cracked.”

I asked her if we would see Nyssa on LoT again and she said she hoped so.

I mentioned a nyssara reunion and she was down for it. She wants to do their backstory.

I told her they need an entire episode dedicated to them meeting and such. She said to keep tweeting the writers about it.

She was just so sweet and easy to talk to. Didn’t make me feel dumb when I fumbled over my words at first. She also sang happy birthday to two fans (see my twitter gothlicitys for video). And all the money she made today is going to charity.

Honestly such a beautiful human being inside and out.

srdgl  asked:

I need help finding an English, free (or really cheap) college (astronomy, physics, technology) that has a high education. I found one in Norway but Norwegian is required and I'm only two years away from my high school graduation and a lot of work is waiting for me. The one in New Zealand is a bit more than my family can afford. Can you please help me, it's pretty urgent.

Okay so not really sure if you mean British universities or English speaking ones, but regardless I’m only really helpful with UK unis but other people feel free to contribute

Here’s the ranking of universities for physics and astronomy and here’s the complete list of all uk unis teaching physics, here for astronomy and here for technology

Now I’m not going to lie to you, higher education in the Uk is not cheap so tbh this might all be irrelevant. What you’re going to need to do is look near the bottom of the league tables because those universities are going to be cheaper. Even then, fees at the top unis are £9000 a year and even more for international students. Some of the lower down unis should be cheaper but I don’t really know how much they charge. You also have to pay to apply through UCAS but I think that’s only about £20, but still worth keeping in mind. A lot of universities have bursaries or scholarships though, it’s not as big a thing as it is in the US and I don’t really have any experience with it, but still might be worth looking into! 

If anyone has any other information for either uk unis or other english speaking countries feel free to add to this!

OK.  I need to vent.

To somebody.  Anybody.  And so writing it all down and tagging it seemed like the most efficient way to do it… And yes, it has to do with these two:

So.  After a lot of thought… I’ve decided to momentarily remove myself from the Caryl ship.  NOT FOREVER, just for the moment.  I’m sick and tired of always being left sick and tired.  I’ve been boarding this ship since Cherokee Rose and the amount of times I’ve been teased, dragged along, and left disappointed has really worn me out.  Like, really.  I’m beginning to not enjoy the rest of the show because of it.  My undying feelings for Daryl and Carol ultimately cloud everything else.  Like, nothing else matters to me at this point.  And that shouldn’t be the case!  Each episode that has Norman and Melissa, I can’t help but get all of my hopes up.  And then when NOTHING HAPPENS, the rest of the episode doesn’t exist to me.  Messed up, right?  I know. it’s very dramatic of me, but CAN YOU BLAME ME??  

5 seasons!! It’s been 5 seasons since Cherokee Rose!!  So many emotional and important scenes have happened between the two of them since then!  That terminus hug should’ve been IT, am I right?!  I mean, they had an entire 40 min episode all to themselves!!  But I get it.  They probably weren’t in the right emotional state to be in a “relationship” with each other.  And after Beth died, that certainly wasn’t the time either.  But when they found Alexandria!?  When the group found safety!?  And peace!?  There were walls! There was stability!  And you’re gonna tell me she picks TOBYN?!?!  Hell.  No.  (I’m still not over that, can you tell? lol).  

I just…. It’s not realistic anymore ya know?  It’s not freaking realistic.  I’m sick of this.  All of it.  I don’t care that Norman believes Daryl has “no game”.  I don’t care that in Norman’s head, “Daryl wouldn’t be the one to make the first move”.  That was definitely the truth in previous seasons.  But given what they’ve both been through?  Given when they’ve lost?  And how many times they’ve been separated and brought back together??? The fact that they’re STILL NOT TOGETHER doesn’t make any damn sense.

And I know.  I know, I know, I know, that just because they haven’t kissed or anything doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t together.  I’m aware that Norman said that they’re already “together”.  And I believe that.  With all of my heart.  They are each other’s person.  They’re soulmates.  But.  The fact that they haven’t locked lips just isn’t realistic. A kiss represents a mutual understanding and affection for one another.  A kiss means everything!

It’s not fair that every other couple on this show– Abraham and Rosita, Tara and Denise, Rick and Michonne, Glenn and Maggie, Aaron and Eric, Carl and Enid (THE CHILDREN FOR GOODNESS SAKE), Sasha and Bob (RIP Bob), and countless others have recognized their chemistry and have claimed one another with a kiss.  But Daryl and Carol haven’t?  After five seasons?  I don’t buy it.  Not anymore.

So I’m done.  I’m removing myself for the time being.  I don’t expect any of you to care, but I just felt the need to vomit all these words on here.  And being honest?  i really do feel a lot better now :)

What are your thoughts?  Do you agree? Disagree?  Any words of encouragement for the die hards who will never give in to the tide??

anyway schooling show thoughts

The usual ‘ugh look at these kids with actual tall boots and classy horses riding around and I’m almost 24 and I’m Nothing’ occurred but also, a lot less than before

Bc it really surprised me how far I’ve come and how quickly. It’s nothing spectacular, but in the last yearish I’ve found two instructors, infiltrated the dressage community/made friends, I have so many more breeches, I got my half chaps which make me feel 20x more Equestrian, collected a ridiculous amount of tack, improved my riding a lot, and successfully fallen off for the first time.

And watching these kids ride their little low level figures I was like yeah, I could probably do that. Not WELL, but with some practice I could successfully go from letter to letter and do transitions and steer the horse and manage to stay in the arena.

So yeah considering how quickly I’ve been able to get thru these early stages, I feel less shitty comparing myself to kids who have been riding for years, and a lot more optimistic ig


“And I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again..”

I like to think a lot about how Blinky must feel having lost two loved ones within such a short time period like??? is he doing ok i gotta know 

The top one was from thisn morning and the other from a couple weeks ago when all I could listen to was see you again from furious 7 

anonymous asked:

A question about daredevil, Foggy says Matt doesn't have long relationships and we see through the series that yeah, it's 100% true. But, and here's the real deal: haven't they been "friends" for years?? Like, is it safe to say that Matt'a longest relationship is with Foggy, then. I just really freakin hate how this two losers are wasting their time, what the hell

Oh, Foggy is 100% Matt’s longest and in a lot of ways most emotionally intimate relationship. The timeline of the show is, as we know, kind of a mess, but if you assume that they met in 2006, Matt has now had Foggy in his life for longer than he had Jack in his life.

I think it’s very much a case of Matt not feeling the need for a serious relationship with anyone else because he’s already getting all the support and companionship and comfort he needs from Foggy, and Foggy not quite realizing how significant that is from Matt’s end because of course Foggy would provide those things, Foggy was put on this Earth to nurture and Matt Murdock needs nurturing. So Foggy has no idea how important he is to Matt, and Matt’s terrified to show him because everyone he loves abandons him or dies or both.

anonymous asked:

Can adhd relate I difficulty noticing and clocking physical and mental health problems? I know they're there but, the same thing that happens with important tasks, i don't feel importance to bring it into realisation or vocally confirm the problem. It's really difficult for me to do

I don’t know for sure, but I feel like yes? I have a lot of trouble with body awareness. Like, once I had a headache for two weeks (I think) but I can’t actually be totally sure when it started or when it ended.


anonymous asked:

Sorry if this is TMI- I just recently got on testosterone, five weeks ago to be exact. I knew there would be clitoral growth and an increased sex drive, but there's been a lot of that. Even after two weeks I noticed my clitoris had grown quite a lot, I've been getting turned on more easily and more often. It's only been a little over a month of testosterone, is there something wrong or is this how it's supposed to go?

That’s pretty normal. Genital growth and libido changes are often (but not always) one of the first changes that people notice on testosterone. There’s a pretty large range for what’s considered ‘normal’ here so don’t worry if you’re reading this and feel like your transition isn’t going well/isn’t fast enough/etc because you haven’t experienced the same thing. Some people notice genital growth right away while others may not experience it for several months - it all depends on how your body responds to and utilizes testosterone. The rate of the growth can also vary as some people grow very rapidly in a short period of time whereas others might experience slow gradual changes over the course of several months/years. The actual growth can range anywhere from about ½ an inch to over 3 inches but the majority of people will fall between 1-2. The increased sex drive should calm down with time as your body adjusts to the hormonal changes.

I see so much emphasis on this website on the fact that bi women and lesbians often have very similar if not interchangeable experiences, and that it’s often hard for queer women to tell if their attraction to men is genuine or the result of social coercion. There are plenty of positivity posts for girls and women who aren’t sure if they’re bi or lesbians. 

And yet, so many people who participate in the above balk at the idea of women outright claiming both labels! It’s understandable for a woman to be unsure if she’s really attracted to men, or to be caught between two labels, but when it comes down to picking a label for sure, she’s got to pick a side. 

This strikes me as very unhelpful when it comes to community building. If it’s true that bi women and lesbians have a shared history and a lot of overlapping experiences, why is it so harmful for a woman to feel a connection to both labels and communities? Why is it so hard to imagine that attraction might be fluid for a given woman, or that she might want to mainly be involved with other women but still be attracted to men, and thus connect with both labels? Also, split attraction is a thing that exists for some people. It does no good to deny that. 

We really need to be a lot less rigid in our understandings of identity construction and to stop holding other people to essentialist and restrictive standards when it comes to labeling themselves.  

anonymous asked:

Do you have any good fem!Ten x Rose fic recs? Any rating, but I've yet to see any adult ones.

Hey Nonny! Thanks for stopping by! Oh gosh, I’ve admittedly only read a few bc I’m a really slow reader, but I definitely need to read more. Anyone please feel free to add your own fics or your favorites to this list! 

A New Way to Wake Up by @wordsintimeandspace

And I just read the start of a new one! Who We Are by @wordsintimeandspace

Understanding by @angelandfaith 

Ways to Keep Warm by @perfectlyrose

^^^ These two have written lots I think, I just haven’t read them all yet :)

This one is fem!Eight x Rose but I’ve decided you gotta read it Nonny. Fragility of Memory (Strength of Heart) by @perfectlyrose

You can also find fem!Doctor fics in this tag

anonymous asked:

Also what do u think is gonna happen with the pidge finding her family arc? Do you think they are just gonan find her brother and not her dad, because I don't think they have found any trace of her dad yet

I definitely think they’re going to find Matt, but I haven’t actually thought too much about whether or not they’re going to find her dad. My first instinct is that they’re only going to find Matt and the two of them will have to mourn together, but Voltron still has a lot of time left and I think it would be interesting if when Matt and Pidge are brought together, Matt has more information on where their dad might be and the two of them can search for him together. Give me the Holt siblings stopping at nothing to find their dad. Give me a beautiful family reunion where Pidge can finally feel safe in the arms of the two family members she’d fought so hard to save.


I had a really wonderful weekend. Like really really wonderful. The past five days have actually been good. Five whole days in a row. I always feel weird saying that I’m proud of myself, but I’m really proud so I’m going to say it anyway. I don’t think I’ll ever reach a place where I’m “cured” and that has been hard to come to terms with, but being in a place where I know what I need and I can be kind to myself and speak up and really take good care is a pretty damn good place to be. It takes a lot of work, but I’m doing my best. And I guess that’s why I’m proud. 5 days of feeling good seems like a really big accomplishment.

yesterday I did absolutely nothing, but in the best way possible. a self-care day of sorts I guess. it was rainy so I cuddled with the dog and read two books and watched tv and had a schoolwork free day to just relax and unwind because I needed one of those days. I ate mac and cheese and also some ice cream and went to sleep at 9:00 and it was perfect. 

today I saw my best friend and we went to our old college to see some other friends and I truly had the most wonderful time. my bff is the most special person and we’ve both been through so much and I love her so dearly. we’re really similar in a lot of ways, but also total opposites in that she’s loud and outgoing and completely unapologetic and usually embarrasses me in public but also brings out a really fun side in me that I often forget I’m allowed to have. she makes me laugh and she makes me feel safe and things always feel right when I’m with her. 

we had an hour long drive so I made a playlist on my phone with lots of her favorite songs and every time a new one came on she’d get emotional over the fact that I remembered it. we always have the best talks in the car and I look forward to driving with her anywhere even if it’s only for five minutes. things get deep as hell and I love it. there are very few people who I can be joking with one second, and discussing my mental health in detail with the next. and she is one of about three. I’m thankful for that. 

freshmen year, we were in this mental health advocacy club together called active minds. we were both deeply passionate about it, but never really discussed why. it wasn’t until years later that we learned why we were each so personally invested and ever since then we’ve been quietly fighting our battles together. today we were singing along to jefferson airplane and then turned down the radio real quick to talk about that time I was hallucinating for two weeks, and then she told me about how she had to get away from her boyfriend last week because she suddenly got paranoid he was going to kidnap her and kill her. we laughed at how crazy we were and then went back to singing. I love that. 

sunday nights are usually filled with dread for me. I never feel ready to face the week and spend a lot of time wishing I was someone else, somewhere else. but today I feel ok. what’s that phrase about rose colored glasses? I’m trying to see the world that way. school feels better, my internship feels better. a lot of things feel better. I haven’t cried since tuesday. I haven’t felt anxious since wednesday. I’m not all that sad. I so badly want it to stay like this. I know it won’t but I feel like I’m taking important steps every day and working to make these good stretches last just a little bit longer each time. five days is a lot. tomorrow will be six. I’m really proud.

“You’re Welcome” from Moana, as sung by Edgar Allen Poe, Emily Dickenson, Charles Dickens, Shakespeare, and two other old-timey authors I cannot hope to remember the names of

I see what’s inevitably happening here

You’re masque of red death-to-face with greatness and it’s strange

Thou don’t even know how you feel

“It’s adorable”, he growled incoherently

It’s nice to behold that humans never change

Open your eyes, let’s commence

Yes, it’s really me, It’s Maui, breathe it in

I know it’s a lot; the hair, the bod

When you’re falling in perusal glances at a demigod!

What can I assuredly declare except, you’re welcome!

For the tides, the sun, the broad welkin 

Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay, you’re welcome! Nevermore! 

I’m just an ordinary demi-sorely shaken soul! (what the heck, Poe)

Hey! Nevermore!
What distinctly has two thumbs that pulled up the broad welkin
When you were waddling yay high
This sorely shaken soul!

When the nights got rimy
Who stole you halo of hell from down below
You’re lookin’ at that magnanimous being, yo

Oh, also I lassoed the shining eye of heaven
You’re welcome!
To stretch the days and generously bring you fun

Also I harnessed the breath of summer
You’re welcome!
To fill your sails and tremulously vibrate your trees

So what can I assuredly declare except you’re welcome
For the islands I pulled from the sea
There’s no truly require to pray, it’s okay
You’re welcome!
Ha, I audacious generalization it’s just my way of being me

Well, voraciously come to think of it

Kid, honestly, I can go on as well as on

I can condescendingly explain every natural phenomenon

The tide, the field of grazing grain, the ground,

Oh, that was Maui just messin’ around! Nevermore!

I killed an eel

I buried it’s guts

Sprouted a shady secret enemy for torrid days

Presently you’ve got coconuts

What’s the lesson

“What is the takeaway”, he growled incoherently

Don’t mess with Maui when he’s on a breakaway!

And the tapestry here on my wardrobe which the robe doth hide

Is a map of the victories I win

Look where I’ve always been

I make everything inevitably happen

Turn thine eyes toward that mini Maui just tippity-tapping

Well, anyway let me assuredly declare you’re welcome

For the wonderful holy globe you know

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay, you’re welcome” replied Oliver, “I want some more”

Well voraciously come to think of it, I gotta go

Hey, it’s your diurnal course to say you’re welcome

‘Cause I’m gonna truly require that boat

I’m sailing away, away,

You’re welcome

'Cause Maui can do all that can be contemplated but float!

You’re welcome! Nevermore!

You’re welcome!

As well as thank you!