My brother and I were singing along to ’ ‘Kiwi’ and my brother goes “Kiwi stands for ‘Kendall I Wasn’t Interested’ ” and I swear that’s one of the truest things I’ve ever heard my brother say

self care tips!! uwu

-hydrate

-find pigs to eat

-become so obsessed with killing a pig that you ignore every other sense of reason

-paint your face

-offer a pigs head to your mental demons

-separate yourself from society and create a tribe of chaos and savagery 

-throw a boulder at a boy who was trying to retain order in your falling apart civilization, killing him instantly

-find someone who is better than you at things and destroy him 

-set the island on fire 

LotF Mean Girls AU
  • “Get in, loser. We’re going hunting.” -jack, upon seeing ralph staring at some other guy during soccer practice, promptly getting jealous, and trying to turn ralph’s attention on him.
  • “Raise your hands if you’ve ever felt personally victimized by jack merridew.” (everybody including the entire choir stands up.)
  • “That’s why his hair is so red. It’s full of anger.”
  • “On wednesdays we wear war paint”
  • “I don’t hate you because you’re fat, you’re fat because I hate you” -jack to piggy
  • “I wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school. I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy.” -simon probably
  • “Bill once caught making out with a hot dog.” “Oh my God, that was one time!”
  • “Samneric both hooked up with Coach Carr?!”