lost for lena

fall

or…lena doesn’t stop believing in the one person who believed in her

(or…the terrible thing i wrote to get rid of writer’s block and it’s long and sad but has a happy ending)

Supergirl dies on a Wednesday.

Sometimes, when she’s alone in her office in the wee hours of the morning, still in yesterday’s clothing and unsure when she’d last eaten, she thinks about that, the utter normalcy of losing National City’s hero on a Wednesday. Somehow, the death on such a boring day of the week provides a sort of stark contrast that Lena has trouble wrapping her head around. After all, surely the hero and pride of National City would fall in a blaze of glory on a Friday night, a Sunday afternoon, even a Monday morning during rush hour.

But a Wednesday? Some time between mid-morning and noon? When nothing was happening except for the drudge of the week, the tireless churning of society?

She doesn’t understand it—has tried to come to terms with it with very little success. In her weakest moments, when she’s staring down the end of a bottle of whiskey or wine (before Jess or Maggie or even James Olsen pry the bottle from her fingertips and help her get home), she thinks the very banality of Supergirl’s death is evidence of its unnecessary nature, its needless, pointless, meaningless, asinine

Supergirl dies on a Wednesday.

By Friday, the President herself comes to National City to mourn the fallen hero. She talks about the few short conversations she’s had with Supergirl, how everyone should be inspired and follow Supergirl’s wonderful example. A true hero, an exemplary citizen.

(Lena doesn’t go to the ceremony. She and Alex spend that afternoon in Kara’s apartment, sitting on Kara’s couch, Alex stoically staring at the television screen with silent tears running down her cheeks and Lena gripping her hand so tightly she thinks she’ll break fingers.  

After that, Lena doesn’t see much of Alex at all.)

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4

Supercorp Appreciation Week

Day 2 (April 25): Favorite Quote

So I had an entire post scheduled to go today because I’m very busy but I still managed to find the time to watch Ace Reporter and immediately had to redo this day’s quote because HOLY SHIT OMG. This episode destroyed me.

Lena: Loss does strange things to my family and I’ve lost a lot of people.

Kara: Well, you’re not gonna lose me.

Lena: I think when I feel things again, I’m gonna be very, very afraid of the person I might be.

Kara: You don’t have to be afraid. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.

Lena: Promise?

Kara: I will always be your friend. And I will always protect you. I promise.

 I’m posting this from the grave, FYI.

This exchange was beautiful. One of the things that made me ship supercorp in the first place was just how honest these two are with each other. And this exchange? It’s a whole new level. Lena has stated over and over how she wants to be different from her family and her actions have proven it. But here, she’s openly admitting to Kara that she’s actually terrified of being like her family. But not her brother, like everyone thinks. But of her mother. She’s so afraid that she’s going to end up like Lillian Luthor. The cold and calm facade Lillian has that masks how dangerous she is. She doesn’t want to be like Lillian. But in this moment, she feels like her.

It goes back to what Supergirl told Lena in Medusa. “She [Lillian] is cold and dangerous. And you are too good and too smart to follow in her path.” It gives that scene a whole new perspective when you realize Lena has feared that she’s like Lillian in this respect.

And Kara takes a different approach this time. Because as Supergirl, she can only comfort Lena with words. But as Kara, she can be more…intimate.

Lena talks about how much she’s lost? Kara assures her that Lena won’t lose her.

Lena tells Kara about how she’s afraid of who she will be when she’s no longer numb? Kara says you don’t have to be afraid. Because from the beginning, Kara has known that Lena is good. She’s so good and wants to help and wants to better the world. Yes, she has a dark side and can sometimes operate in a morally gray area but Kara is certain that Lena doesn’t have to fear being a bad person because she’s just not one. And if something ever happens where that might change? Well, Kara will be right there for Lena and help her through it.

And now the part of the dialogue that really gets me. Lena asks Kara to promise that she isn’t going anywhere. That she won’t leave Lena like everyone else has that Lena cares about. And we know that Kara is Lena’s family. We know that no one has done for Lena what Kara has done and based on canon quotes, this includes Jack. So Lena asks Kara to promise that she won’t lose her.

And Kara can’t. She can’t promise Lena that she won’t ever leave her because Kara is Supergirl. And if she promises that and then something happens to her? She’d have broken that promise. And Kara is all about trust. So she can’t promise that she’ll always be there. But she can promise that she will always be Lena’s friend. And that is so, so important. Friendship has to be the core for any relationship. Romance should never be put above friendship because your romantic partner has to be your friend. And these two are so lucky to have both.

What Kara can also promise? Is that she will always protect Lena. Kara has gone into death defying situations to protect Lena and would do so again. Always. And Lena’s reaction when Kara says this? When she was snuggling into Kara’s side with her eyes closed? Her eyes open wide and her mouth drops. Because every time Kara has protected Lena? Has been as Supergirl. And whether this was just a slip on Kara’s part or Kara threw caution to the wind to make this promise because she wanted Lena to know how much she meant to her, I’m not sure. But it happened. And Lena noticed. And I think if Lena had any doubt before, now she knows.

camilaskara  asked:

ok so like. i know i'm spamming ur inbox but imagine this au. kara being the new rookie for the USWNT and lena is best friends w maggie who is Obsessed with soccer (yes bc lena needs friends in aus and maggie/lena would be the ultimate brotp) and like kara is Mega Bi and dresses like a total daddy with her adidas warm up joggers and yeezys and a tshirt and she's fucking ripped and lena sees her warming up before a game and has a gay meltdown

don’t ever apologize for spamming me with AUs i live for this.

askdfhjasd i can just imagine Lena hating sports and only going to the game bc of Maggie, bc Maggie’s gf’s sister is playing.

when Lena complained about sports not being her thing and fans being too loud Maggie was like “okay but u like girls so…” and Lena was like okay true, so she went there but already prepared herself that she’s gonna absolutely hate it there.

but then Kara shows up on the field and waves in their direction bc Alex and Maggie and she starts stretching and Lena fuccin loses her shit and wow i highkey wanna write this fic now

camilaskara  asked:

and like wow imagine an au where kara is an ex marine??? she'd have been part of ROTC in high school and then served her necessary number of tours and she'd come back to Midvale where she and Lena were high school sweethearts but lost touch and lena owns a bookstore and is engaged to some girl and then Kara would walk in with her service dog for PTSD and lena would be shook bc damn Kara is fit as hell and she also missed her puppy ex gf

Lena’s nickname for Kara was “puppy” when they were dating.

so when Kara comes back, she walks in with a golden retriever and Lena is shook for a moment (to see Kara again after years have passed) but then she approaches them and goes to pet the dog and she’s like “Kara honey, u haven’t changed a bit” and Kara just rolls her eyes and laughs like Lena pls, n then they hug :’)