loosen your corset

10.11.15

it’s so hot that you…

Aries: run around naked shrieking like a banshee
Taurus: try to fit inside your fridge
Gemini: watch Frozen to cool down
Cancer: roll down the windows and blast “Hot In Herre”
Leo: put ice in your own shirt
Virgo: befriend someone just to use their air conditioning 
Libra: loosen your corset and lay on your fainting couch, fanning yourself and sipping a mint julep 
Scorpio: fry an egg on the sidewalk for breakfast b/c ur ‘energy conscious’ 
Sagittarius: straight up grab a u-haul and move north
Capricorn: look for Narnia at the back of your closet 
Aquarius: use the power of positive thinking to bring down your body temperature
Pisces: find your goldfish boiled…dinner?