look at the flirting i just

"Just get me to space hospital"
  • Some Alien: Only family members can see patients. We want to make sure outside influences don't hamper our clients recovery
  • Lance: *Flirty smile* I think that's an excellent policy. I'm Sven's brother *Kisses the aliens hand*
  • Alien: *smiles* *turns to Keith in question*
  • Keith: Im- Im with him.
  • Alien: So, you're friend of-
  • Keith: No im-im WITH him. *grabs his arm*
  • Lance: *Looks at Keith weirdly*
  • Keith: *sweating* Haha he thinks the flirting makes me jealous *hisses* just go along with it

anonymous asked:

My first kiss was at a party drunk with a bi girl who is also the only girl who is out in my entire school (I'm not out either) and we made out all night then slept on the sofa spooning but me being my dumb gay self in the morning woudlnt look her in the eye and I haven't spoken to her since even though she keeps trying to speak to me and I'm pretty sure she flirts as well but what do I know!!

I’m gonna make “JUST TALK TO HER” t-shirts and give them to all the wlws cause we are all dumbasses

tell me your gay disaster stories

hey gays! looking for some hot new flirting tips? impress her with a frankly upsetting amount of trivia about quantum leap star and lesbian icon scott bakula!

anonymous asked:

I'm sorry to bring this back, but the one thing that b! L@nce theorists bring up is that "he can't possibly be that flirty with women because he likes women! He's overcompensating! He must like guys!" Like, first of all, fuck that, and second, he's obviously overcompensating for being a virgin (I am joking)

HDSGKSDG NO ANON YOU’RE RIGHT THOUGH first of all there’s no way wance isn’t a virgin. second of all i hate that “there’s no way lance likes girls, he flirts with girls too much for that to be true” is such a COMMON explanation (i won’t even say evidence this is nothing) for bi lance. it really just reads as “oh? you like women? you like women so much that you… flirt with them? sounds fake. there’s no way you could possibly like women that much. nobody likes women that much. nobody likes women,”

like would any of these people ever look at a flirty gay character and go, “this person flirts with men too much. it can’t possibly just be because he likes men. he’s overcompensating. he’s bisexual”?? the answer is no and we both know it and that’s the tea

anonymous asked:

so this girl has been flirting with me and hinting she wants to hook up but there’s a good chance she’s straight and this is just gonna be an experiment for her and her ex bf is super controlling and already warned me off what do i do?? like i don’t care about just having a hook up i’m not looking for anything more but if she is straight i don’t wanna be some cringy story she tells her friends one day and also i don’t want her ex to punch me

yikes honestly i would just stay away. i mean offer her emotional support if she needs/wants it as she detaches herself from this guy, but if i woudl really caution against trying to start something romantic or sexual with this person

i always had a crush on my english student teacher in high school (who became a teacher there after that year) because we would talk about metal and hardcore together, plus i obviously flirted with him all the time. we became friends on facebook for a while after i graduated and went back and forth about new age hardcore then he made an announcement that he was deleting his facebook
but he just added me on instagram….should i slide in his DMs…..
he only follows tattoo artists, coworkers, and friends his age… no one from my old high school
…… i wanna fuk
isn’t having sex with a teacher everyones dream?? am i right??
?how does one even go about this though? 

anonymous asked:

Looking for some advice I’m a 6’1 guy that has to look intimidating for work but as an unfortunate side effect I tend to attract a lot of girls that expect me to be the person I have to be professionally when all I want is to be physically and emotionally vulnerable with someone as a sub since I can’t do that in my daily life How do I even begin to find someone that would be willing to be a domme to a guy that doesn’t look super thin and maybe doesn’t fit the normal sub “look”

I understand the first part. I mean, people I know and have been attracted to me aren’t subs: They have no way to know I’m a Domme, I’m just their friend/classmate/coworker, etc. That’s not exclusive to you, don’t worry, it happens to everybody in the BDSM community when they flirt with people outside it.

Flirting inside the community, you may have to try a bit harder than others but I assure you there are Dommes out there who love your type.

Back in the day when I used to browse Fetlife, I befriended a Pro-Domme who exclusively accepted clients that were men in powerful positions because she loved the whole “I look strong and powerful and intimidating, but in reality I’m a soft puppy that melts in your lap”. 

I’m pretty sure she’s not the only one, and that there’ll be many other Dommes that prefer that kind of sub too. So please don’t give up! You’ll find a lovely lady to discipline you and who will love you with all her heart, I’m sure of that ♥

*Insert cheesy mermaid pun here*



Originally posted by shwtlee4reylo

Originally posted by reylooo

Originally posted by kyloxdriver

Originally posted by reginaphalangephalange

Originally posted by iammonica21

Originally posted by adam-gifted-driver


anonymous asked:

like, imagine eddie working in a 24/7 convinience store during the night shift (like,,, 11pm-4am) and richie is a regular that just comes in the weirdest hours and buys the most bizarre combo of items and is always trying to flirt w eddie making puns with whatever items hes buying and eddie lowkey likes it (cue stan rolling his eyes)

lmaooo yes yes yes!!

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

can you say which bts songs fit the signs?

i already did “signs as bts eras” and “signs as songs from love yourself: her” but not their overall songs, so let’s see:

aries - the rise of bangtan
of course a song associated with beginnings and a “rise” would fit best with the first sign of the zodiac. first, it’s a lit song and the energy fits a fiery aries. speaking of fire, that’s a word they say often in this song. it’s a song they sang with the raw enthusiasm and passion of a newly debuted idol and i think it fits aries perfectly

taurus - move
although a song dedicated to leaving a dorm can sound silly to some, i think a taurus can relate deeply to it. taurus rules the 2nd house, our material possessions. tauruses attach to material things and objects more than any other signs, often associating them with distinct memories and feelings. nostalgia is very strong. also, they tend to be homebodies so their house holds a lot of importance, and moving is a significant event.

gemini - where did you come from?
a cute, lighthearted song about a guy trying to flirt with the new girl. the almost childish beat and upbeat vibe reminds me of the inner childlike nature this sign has. geminis are known for being the most curious or nosy of the zodiac, and just look at the lyrics:
Where did you come from?
Will you tell me your name?
I’m so curious
I’m really so curious

cancer - mama
what can i say? cancer is the ruled by the moon, and is the sign most closely associated with the mother. and this is very true. every cancer i’ve met has been defined greatly by their relationship with the mother, either positively or negatively. hoseok creatively expresses his love and gratitude for his mom in this awesome track, and although he doesn’t have any cancer in his chart, his moon in his 1st house.

leo - if i ruled the world
ah yes, a classic. leo, the sign of the lion, is most associated with royalty and leadership. i think the lighthearted and fun way the boys talk about enjoying money, women, and music (while also staying loyal to bts and their family) if they were world leaders fit this sign really well.

virgo - coffee
coffee is something i often associate with virgos. something people drink to be productive, but also results in insomnia and nervousness. this bittersweet song has many lyrics that remind of things this sign experiences: 

  • nerves (”Our highly anticipated first date, why did I bite my nails? Why was I so nervous?”)
  • awkward situations (”Our first text and phone call that was filled with awkward moments”)
  • and noticing small things about your crush and sometimes mimicking them (”Oh and I don’t drink macchiatos. You know that I started drinking americanos because of you”)

libra - 24/7 = heaven
such a sweet song about young love. really it’s all about a guy getting butterflies in his stomach thinking about the date he’s going on the next day, how cute is that? i can totally see a libra, the most hopeless romantic sign, thinking/saying some of these cheesy lyrics:
My first date with you, my heart keeps pounding like a kid
My heart is filled with noise, I hum with excitement
If time is a stock called you, I would invest

scorpio - what am i to you?
oh god a scorpio anthem. funny enough, it’s performed by a scorpio rising/venus man: namjoon. u can really hear the raw passion, pain, and anger that’s often felt by this sign. the overall message, questioning his worth to his partner, is also very typical of scorpios in relationships. a lot of their possessiveness comes from insecurities, and never truly forget being scorned by a lover (”I can take my eyes off you but I can’t take my heart off you”) although scorpios are known for being closed off and secretive, they bare it all for the one they love (”The person is you, I still don’t know but, I’ll make you know everything about me”)

sagittarius - outro: wings
a perfect match! sagittarius is represented by a centaur (man x horse) but honestly i view them more as man x pegasus. apart from the exhilarating beat, the whole concept of wings and the freedom and adventure they grant is very reminiscent of the free spirit this sign possesses. “I went on the road that I was told not to go, I did things I was told not to do” perfectly reflect the courage and bravery of a sag

capricorn - road/path
a tearjerker. as we all know, saturn’s influence is hard. saturn makes you work, and there’s really no easy way around its lessons. a capricorn’s success is often characterized by a rags to riches story. they come from rough backgrounds and follow a rocky path, but through hard work reach success. that’s exactly what bts discussed in this song: their struggles as trainees and the uncertainty they felt, but also how forming a group provided comfort and stability

aquarius - whalien 52
aquarius is the sign of friends and groups. they’re often seen as social butterflies, having such a large circle of friends. but we can’t forget the inner detachment many feel. aquariuses can feel painfully alone in a room full of people. this could be because of their uranus rulership, they never truly feel like they fit in. similar to how the whale’s unique pitch is what led to its isolation, aquariuses unique characteristics or mindset also isolates them from the rest of society.

pisces - love is not over (full length edition)
one of my favorites from them. the overall sound and lyrics are so hauntingly gorgeous. and under neptune’s blurry influence, heartbreak in love is common for pisces. “Love is so painful, goodbyes are even more painful.” the feeling of longing and holding onto a love that is gone. so beautiful, so pisces.


I love this teasing tone Peggy uses with Angie sometimes (◡‿◡✿)

Bokuto: Dude, for someone so good looking, how are you so bad at seducing people?

Kuroo: Hey, that’s not fair! I managed to seduce Kenma, didn’t I?

Kenma: you turned up at my house with a video game in your hand and said “what do you think, baby? Have I got game?’… I let you in out of pity.


Bokuto: *dies laughing*

SF!Paps x Reader Fluff

Raffle Winner One-shot
For @artsietango
SFW SF!Paps x Reader smooch/ confession

Papyrus came in every day, like clockwork, and ordered a shot of whiskey and a bottle of barbecue sauce.  

You’d been working at Muffet’s for several months now, and despite the fact that it was monster-run (and that the job had taken you a considerable amount of courage to accept with your arachnophobia), your presence as a human had helped draw a more diverse crowd.  Muffet mixed the drinks with a deft, practiced speed that only someone with three sets of arms could possess, while you carried a platter of drinks from table to table, and numerous little spiders took pastries and burgers to customers from a network of webs in the top of the tavern.  

And every day since you started, Papyrus would walk in and sit at the same seat in the same booth and order the same thing.  

You slide the barbecue sauce to him as you pass his table and wink.  Papyrus usually chuckles and calls you saucy, but this time, he doesn’t even acknowledge you.  He’s got his hood pulled up, and he’s looking down at the table, his usual laid-back grin pulled into a grim line.  The expression startles you enough that you falter in your steps and cause the tray to unbalance, a few drinks sliding along the edge of your platter.  Hurriedly, you correct yourself before they spill and keep going, but you’re distracted as you distribute your orders.

What was wrong with him?

By the time you make it back around to his table, he’s already got two empty shot glasses in front of him, and three spiders are bringing a third glass down the web.  "Hey, Rus.  You didn’t even say hi to me,“ you state lightly, trying to rib him into a response.

His phalanges close around the shot glass, and he shrugs lightly.  His posture’s slouched, with his elbows on the table.  "hey.  sorry,” he mutters, holding up the whiskey to stare unseeingly at it.  

“You’re really pounding them back,” you observe, trying to tread lightly.  Usually, your friend is full of jokes and flirtatious remarks.  You’ve never seen him in a mood this sullen.

He hums, though the sound is nearly lost in the music playing from the jukebox.  "jus’ needed somethin’ to whiskey me away for a bit,“ he murmurs, before taking the shot.  He chases it with a swig of barbecue sauce, straight from the bottle.  You’ve never understood the appeal, and it doesn’t seem to be a monster thing.  But it’s definitely a Rus thing.

“Wanna talk about it?”

He finally turns his head to look at you, his orange eyelights shifting along your body, up to your face.  When his gaze locks with yours, you see resignation flash through his expression, before it hardens.  "actually, yeah, i–“

"Hey!  You!  Can I get my drinks here or what?”

You turn to face a group of humans sitting at the booth across from Papyrus’s.  They look like a rowdy crew to you, but you know you have to keep your smile on your face when you address them if you want to keep them placated.  "I’ll be with you in just a moment,“ you insist in your Professional Voice, which only makes another one of the men sigh.

"We’ve been waiting forever, but those creepy spiders aren’t coming!”

Ugh.  You turn toward Papyrus, but he’s already shaking his head and taking another gulp of his barbecue sauce.  "work’s callin’ you,“ he states the obvious.

He’s right.  If it wasn’t a Friday night, you’d have a better chance of being able to sit and talk to him.  "I’ll be right back,” you promise with a sigh, before turning and going to collect the human group’s order from the bar.  

When you reach the humans, you place your platter on the edge of their table to balance it.  "Okay, so who ordered what?“

One of the men grins.  "Why don'tcha guess?”

You really don’t have time for this.  "I really don’t know.  Did you have the bourbon and coke?“

The group laughs; apparently, you got it wrong.  

One of the man’s buddies leans in.  "What kind of drink do you like, babe?”  His eyes flick up and down your body.  "Sex on the beach?“

Ugh.  Keep your smile on your face; you’re representing the entire establishment when you serve someone.  Muffet taught you that–and if the customers decided to leave, your pay would end up docked.  The spider monster happened to be fiercely competitive, likely because of the bakery that had opened up across the street.  Apparently, Muffet and Grillby had some sort of bad history Underground. 

You laugh without any feeling behind it and shake your head.  "So you must be the one that ordered the Screwdriver,” you state tightly, moving the drink in front of him.  The others laugh, and you take a moment to cut your gaze toward Papyrus’s booth.  He’s staring at you directly, another empty shot glass in front of him, his expression blank and unreadable.  It’s difficult to even see his eyelights within his sockets at this point.  

This is taking too long.

“And you must have the Magic Night,” you guess randomly, sliding one of the cocktails with magic liquor in front of another human.  It crackles and fizzles, swirling with purples and reds.  

“So what’re you doing after work?  I can show you a real magic night,” the human states with a smirk and a brow wag, while his buddies laugh and shout exaggerated ’Oooohhh!’s

Your smile tightens.  "I doubt that,“ you shoot back before you can stop yourself, which wipes the smirk right off his face and causes the others to shove him with more exaggerated shouts.  They’re obviously already drunk.  

"Ouch.  Well, I could at least buy you one,” the man offers, holding up his magic cocktail for emphasis.  

“I’m sorry, but I–”  you glance back toward Papyrus… only to spot him walking out of the bar.  Your heart sinks, and you start unloading the rest of the drinks randomly onto the table.  "I have to go.“

You rush toward the front doors, calling out to the bouncer (a hamster monster in a leather, studded jacket), "I’m taking my break!”

You burst through the doors and spot Papyrus leaning against the building, a lit dog treat between his teeth.  Purple smoke curls around his face, and your steps begin to slow as you approach.  "Rus, I thought you wanted to talk.“  Your voice is slightly shaky.

"ya seemed busy tonight,” he replies with a shrug, holding the dog treat between his index and middle phalanges.  “’sides, it’s nothin’ really.”

Your chest clenches; you hate seeing him like this, so unlike the grinning pun-master you’ve come to befriend… and have a huge crush on.  Tentatively, you reach out and place your hand on his arm, gripping the thick fabric of his jacket.  His eyelights shift down to your fingers, staring at them, and you begin to feel self-conscious.  Usually, he’s all about physical contact and casual touches.  

“It doesn’t look like nothing to me, Rus.”

He flicks ashes on the sidewalk.  Standing outside, this close, you could smell just how heavily the alcohol is clinging to him.  It’s obvious now that he had been drinking before he even came to Muffet’s.  “jus’ somethin’ m’lord said to me today that’s been on my mind.”

You relax slightly.  You’re getting somewhere now.  “What did Sans say?”

Papyrus shrugs the opposite shoulder.  “it’s busy in there.  you should be gettin’ back.”

“No,” you blurt, hard enough that his gaze immediately flies to your face.  You know that your expression has hardened, your grip on his jacket tightening with your resolve.  “They can wait.  I don’t care.”

There’s an instant where his gaze searches yours for something, but you’re not sure what he’s hoping to find.  Then, he rather abruptly snags your waist with his arm and twists around the corner of the building, reversing your positions so that your back’s against the brick and he’s got one arm above your head, supporting his weight as he looms over you.  The alley is dark enough that you can see his orange eyelights clearly glowing in their dark sockets, and you can smell a mixture of alcohol and smoky barbecue permeating from his breath.  

Instantly, your breath catches in your throat.  His arm is still around your waist, trapped between your back and the wall, and now both of your hands are fisted in the front of his jacket.  

“but you care about me?”  

The query catches you by surprise enough that you forgot the last sentence that you had said, instead wondering if he’d somehow picked up on your crush.  Your face flushes hot, but you hold his gaze, taking in the sight of his sardonic smirk.  It wasn’t his usual flirtatious one–no, this one looked off, almost cruel.  Was he mocking your feelings?

Or mocking the possibility?

“Of course I do, Rus,” you evenly reply, lifting your chin ever-so-slightly.  A challenge.  “If something’s bothering you, then it’s bothering me, too.”

That seems to catch him off-guard; the smirk fades around the edges, the sides of his teeth twitching.  “heh, you sure ya wanna know?”

“Papyrus.”  Your hand moves up to cup his cheekbone as you say his full name, and his eyelights seem to glow even brighter.  His face tilts into your palm.  “Just talk to me.  Please.”

“ok.”  He sucks in a breath.  His fingers have wiggled beneath the hem of your shirt to trace idle patterns across your skin.  It’s not the first time he’s done this during your flirtatious moments, but it feels so much more intimate in this moment.  “humans and monsters really don’t mix in the long run, ya’know?”  You blink, sucking in a breath to refute him, but Papyrus shakes your hand off his cheek and continues.  “’specially skeleton monsters.  we’re a buncha bones, like a zombie or some kinda halloween decoration.  so why would a human want to be with a spooky skeleton when they could have their pick of any normal human out there?”  He shrugs, his fingers pressing into your skin, feeling the spinous processes of your spine.  “it jus’ sucks.”

His gaze focuses on yours, and he leans in closer, his face only a few inches from yours.  

“‘specially since there’s a human i’m really attached to.  i could probably get ‘em to jump my bones if i tried hard enough, sure, but… they’re not that kinda person.  they deserve better than that.”

His smirk has completely faded, and you feel your heart bottom-out into your stomach.  You’re looking at him with wide eyes, slowly processing the implications.  Your hand’s even still hovering near his face.  He starts to shake his head slightly and pull back, but you grip onto the front of his jacket again and stop him from moving away.  


He freezes, his hand at your back stilling.  You’ve never been the one to make the first move, but dammit, you can’t let this opportunity go to waste.  You tug sharply on the front of his jacket and lean away from the wall at the same time, pressing your lips to his teeth.  He’s completely caught off-guard and stumbles back a step (okay, maybe you put a little too much momentum into the kiss when you pushed away from the wall–whoops), but his arm immediately tightens around your waist, pulling you close against his chest.  You try to put all of your reassurances, all of your feelings for him, into that kiss.  

And then you pull away, your face burning and your lips numb from the tingle of his teeth.  He smirks suddenly, and it’s finally a smirk you recognize on his features–teasing and confident.  “hey, ya’know what they say ‘bout assumin’, dont’cha?”

Oh shit.

Your heart drops.  You begin to backpedal.  “Shit, shit, sorry, I–”

Papyrus starts to chuckle, backing you against the wall again.  His forehead touches yours.  “darlin’, you’re adorable when you’re flustered, ya know that?  ‘course i was talkin’ about you.”

You groan.  Your heart’s hammering in your chest.  “Ha, ha.  Why don’t you stop talking and put your money where your mouth is.”

“ah, so you’re jus’ tryin’ to get tips from your best customer.  i see what that kiss was about now.”

Your arm winds around his neck, and you kiss him straight on the smirk.  He holds onto you tighter, forcing your back to arch away from the wall, pulling your body flush with his.  The sweater he always wears is too thick for you to feel his bones, but your fingers play with the ridges of his neck, and you feel his teeth part your lips.  Something slips into your mouth, warm and crackling with electric magic, and you realize it’s his tongue.  It’s not the first time you’ve seen it, but you never knew it would feel that amazing.  Your body feels hot and tingly, and your heart is pounding so forcefully against your sternum that you’re certain he can feel it, too.  

You’re drunk off his kiss–or maybe just the lingering taste of whiskey in his mouth.  You suddenly remember just how drunk he is and pull back.  His mouth immediately moves to your neck, his orange tongue sliding down your skin, sending delightful tingles straight to your chest.  Your fingernails involuntarily scrape his vertebrae, and he groans.  

“Rus.  Rus, wait.  Were you drinking because Sans said something about me not wanting a monster?”

He pauses, his tongue receding so that only his teeth rested against the juncture of your shoulder and neck.  “eh–somethin’ like that.”  He shrugged, but didn’t move away from you.  “not like it isn’t the truth, i jus’…”  He trails off, obviously trying to censor himself despite his filter being partially down from the booze.  

“It’s not true.  What, you think I just want a quickie in the alley?”

“heh, ya mean this isn’t you just throwin’ me a bone?”  He lifts his head enough to smirk again.  

“Nope.  I like you, Rus.  I’d like to give the whole dating thing a try, if that’s something you’d want.”  

Good lord, you’ve never been this direct before–but after his admissions, you feel like it’s necessary to spell it out.  

“ok.  i’ll be your bonefriend,” he agrees, his smirk turning shit-eating.  You shake your head, laughing.  It always comes so easy when you’re around him.  

“Great.  Now that this is settled, wanna come back inside?  My break’s been over for a while now.”

“sure, i could go for another drink or two.”  He finally steps away, letting you step out of the alley on wobbly legs.  Just like that, everything between you both had changed.  It felt different, putting a label on the mutual feelings you shared, as if everyone could see the charge between both of you now.  

Your face is still blood-red when you re-enter Muffet’s, and you feel the eyes of the booth-ful of humans land on you again.  Papyrus instantly slips his arm around your shoulders, narrowing his gaze on them.  You remember the way he had looked through you while they flirted with you, the way he had obviously been thinking about what his brother said earlier, that you would end up with another human.  

And you turn and rock up on the balls of your feet to press a kiss to his cheekbone.  It actually lights up a soft orange, his eyesockets widening at the brazen display of affection.  

“I’m all yours,” you reassure him, before you step out of his possessive hold so that you can continue your shift.  

He chuckles, his usual lazy smirk more tender than usual.  

“darlin’, that’s my line.” 

(* Mobile Imagine Masterlist  )


- May, what the hell are you doing here? I didn’t request a specialist.
- I go where I’m assigned.

The Adventures of Coulson & May: Some Time Ago 

Person A: I can’t believe how jealous you just got. It’s so embarrassing.

Person B: *Looks a Person A incredulously* Uh, what about you and that barista last week?

Person A: You mean that skank that got what was coming to them because they were blatantly flirting with you when I was standing rIGHT THERE?!?

Person B: They asked me how my day was going.

Person A: Yeah! What a slut!