You felt useless. It seemed like you could never do anything right. He stared up into the mirror. It seemed like there were no words for how you felt. Nothing you could say, nothing anyone could say would help now.
Sighed, looking back down at Alex’s bottle of pills. They were sleep pills, always full. Alex never slept.
You unscrewed the cap, thankful that the boys were all at work that Wednesday. Until you heard the door open.
“Mon amour? I’m back! I got off a bit early!” It had to be Lafayette. You focused all your energy on unlocking the pills, you seemed to forget about locking the door.
sometimes it’s like she’s falling from grace to pick me back up no it’s more like she’s putting herself on her knees and saying honey i’m here for you shes looking up at me like im playing god and i count her eyelashes while i take in the color of her cheeks, her humanity and im realizing now that it’s just that she holds her head a little higher than i do it’s just that she bites her tongue back a little harder than i do its just that she stows all the bad parts of her farther away in herself than i do
Rules: List 10 actresses and/or actors (or a mix of both) you would kiss and then tag 10 blogs. oh my goodness shygaladriel, why would you call me out like this. Uh, i don’t normally think about these things? I mean, I barely watch live action shows, and it’s even rarer I bother looking up a character’s actor…
there is one…
1. DANIEL SHARMAN
2. DANIEL SHARMAN
3. DANIEL SHARMAN
4. DANIEL SHARMAN
5. DANIEL SHARMAN
6. DANIEL SHARMAN
7. DANIEL SHARMAN
8. DANIEL SHARMAN
10. DANIEL SHARMAN
Of course, by ‘kiss’ I mEAN I WANNA SCULPT HIS BUST ON MARBLE BECAUSE HIS FACE IS SO STINKING GREEK-GOD WORTHY LOOK AT THAT JAW I ABSOLUTELY WOULD SPEND A COUPLE WEEKS ON SCULPTURE OF THIS GUY TO PLACE IN MY ROOM AND APPRECIATE BY CHANGING THE LIGHTING AND OBSERVING THE FORMS CHANGE AHHHHHH.
bonus, because anst is also my weakness
I’m not tagging anyone because rules are meant to be broken– but if you wanna do it go ahead and tag me. I need more variety in my wanna-sculpt list of actors.
Look, I have a problem and the problem is cookies. I don’t need the cookies. I just like the cookies. Mostly, though, no. I just drink water. Lots of water. Sometimes a glass of wine. Very occasionally coffee or tea, but caffeine and I don’t always get along, unless it’s morning. Which leads me to…
What time of day do you usually write?
If I’m honest, I’m absolutely useless in the afternoon. No matter how much I sleep, I usually hit a mid-afternoon slump that’s just… Not Good for thinking. When I manage to write in the morning, it’s good. Also rare. So, mostly evening. I used to be a very late night writer, and still miss it, but it just doesn’t jive so well with, y’know, having a husband.
Where do you write?
Often, at my desk. This is the first time in my life I’ve had a room that’s pretty much 98% mine. I have fanart on the walls. I have Garrus and baby Groot on my desk. I have my treasures all around me. I love my office. That said, sometimes I cannot work here. I don’t know why. Then, I usually decamp to a cafe. Sometimes I retreat to my chair in the living room (it’s a green Strandmon chair from Ikea and I love it more than life). A couple of times a year, I write at @w0rdinista‘s house, where I kinda have my own desk in her office, too <3
How often do you write a new fic?
Remember when the answer to this was like, almost every day? Yeah. Me too. When I used to write fic once or twice a week it was “slow.” Ha. Ha. Original fic is part of the reason I’m not as prolific now, which is a good thing. Unfortunately, being kinda in a low-grade stress state for various and sundry reasons has really messed up my creativity, and that’s not so great. (I’m recommitted to doing The Artist’s Way. For real. I’m in Week 2. Dear God, I hope this helps me get back in touch with the joy I used to feel when creating.)
Do you listen to music while you write?
Always. Sometimes a curated playlist. Sometimes a single song on repeat. Often instrumental.
Paper or laptop?
Both. I also have a desktop, but rarely use that for writing because it’s the Windows computer and I hate Scrivener for Windows as much as I adore Scrivener for Mac. Weird. I know. Paper is for talking to myself, getting a different perspective, morning pages, making notes, trying to figure out tricky parts by saying, “OKAY. What the fuck was I trying to accomplish here????” (An astonishing amount of paper thinking starts that way for me. Yes. With the swearing.) Usually, though, it’s MacBook hooked up to peripherals. I have a Razer Ornata keyboard that is the perfect amount of clicky combined with non-wrist-hurting profile. I love it.
Do you have a special pre-writing ritual?
*stares into the camera like The Office* procrastinating. Cleaning. Making sure I have water. Making sure the stars are aligned. Crying. Eating three cookies and wishing I hadn’t. Okay, just one more. There’s raisins and nuts in them, they’re healthy, right? Damn it, Tara.
What do you do to get into the writing?
Sprint, actually. I find that doing a short sprint – even just five or ten minutes – is usually enough to shake off all the thinking and doubts and questioning and lingering procrastination that keeps me from my work. I need to get back into the habit of disconnecting from the internet.
Do you have a reward system for word counts?
Sometimes. If I’ve been having a really rough go, I’ll reward myself not for word counts but for putting in time, even if the word count sucks. Trying. A piece of chocolate after a sprint; an episode of TV or time with a book after a session. Nothing to apply too much pressure. Mentally and creatively, I’m a delicate !@$!#ing flower these days. It’s annoying. I kinda realized I’d let allllll the joy drain out of writing and wasn’t letting myself do anything fun as, like, punishment for not writing? So. That’s not healthy. I’m trying to be kinder to myself. (I am not nearly as kind to myself as I am to others. Also annoying!!!)
Is there anything else about your writing process your readers don’t know?
I love editing. I consider it a vital part of the writing process. I don’t dread it. I used to, until it really hit me (upon editing a book) how much better I made the story by pulling it all to pieces and making sure they all fit the way I wanted. Even when I’m writing fic, it never goes out without at least a couple of passes and a read-out-loud. Reading out loud catches so much. Sometimes I get Scrivener’s read-aloud function to do it for me, while I listen to catch anything awkward or wrong. (She pronounces names really, really weird.) For original fic, I like to edit on paper. Bad for trees, but for some reason I work so much better with a physical copy and stickies and red ink.
I’m not a plotter, but I do make notes. I usually know where I want to go and how I want to get there. If I get stuck, it’s probably my fault for not listening to the characters when they want something, or I’m trying to bully the story forward instead of letting it unfold.
Morning pages are absolutely 100% necessary to my creative functionality.
Instead of falling down “research” rabbit holes, I tend to use square brackets a lot [Look this up later; how the hell is this spelled???; CHECK CODEX; I have no idea what’s happening in this scene it’s so boring omg figure it out later ughghghghg].
I have really been warming to the pomodoro method. I’m not consistent with it yet, but it really works when I put in the effort.
Oh my god guys shit if Ryuu and Io hadn’t started getting along they’d be basically Zen and Jumin. Io and Jumin are rich, handsome and a bit cold but have their soft, quirky sides too, and Ryuu and Zen are aggressively “heterosexual”, passionate flirts very proud of their abilities and good looks jesus christ it’s the same
Alright so I cleaned out the inactive blogs i followed and now my dash is like super slow…. so yeah I’m looking for new blogs to follow! I’m kind of a diverse follower so most of them are kind of lumped into groups but I’ll try to be as specific as I can. Here are some stuff I’m looking for:
Bold: really really want
Seinen anime (like Psycho Pass, Gurren Lagann, Death Note, Durarara, Cowboy Bebop, Darker than Black, Neon Genesis Evangelion, Mononoke, Code Geass, Madoka Magica, Erased, 91 Days)
Josei anime (like Nana, Princess Jellyfish, March Comes in Like a Lion, Anohana, some BL)
Trigger studio anime (Gurren Lagann, Kill la Kill)
Anime by Shinichiro Watanabe (Cowboy Bebop, Samurai Champloo, Zankyou no Terror)
Nintendo in general
Voltron: Legenary Defender bonus if you post a lot of Keith and klance
Multifandom preferably with a lot of variety of anime
Your blog is nice and clean
Talk in your tags
Movies and video games
You are active
Want to be friends???
Not neccesary if
You’re a graphic maker
Don’t tag your shit (appreciated but not necessary since I don’t do that lmao)
Sorry that’s a lot of requirements orz but yeah if you want me to check out your blog please reblog this and write what you post or what kind of blog you are in the tags so I can follow you! Please don’t be offended if I end up not following you.
Mutuals if you can please reblog this that would be great <3