look at me comparing myself again

blue night radio ♡ 170208
translation: fantaemsie

listener (message): when i was a teenager i was a really gloomy child. it seemed like the whole world had turned it’s back on me. i believed i was the only one in the world. back then someone uttered these words to me: “everyone lives like that. you’re not the only one having a hard time. everyone lives in difficulty, and diligently, as much as you do.” at that time, rather than getting hurt by these words i thought: “that’s right so i’ve behaving like a child.” that’s why, from then on, i lived really diligently, only looking straight head. even though, because of my family’s circumstances, i got into college a bit late compared to other people, i pushed my own self with a rod of iron and i refused to face my own wounds since i trusted that, other than me, there are other people who are having a tough time and that everyone is living working hard as much as i do. i live diligently. then i thought: i could be even better, an even more of a good person. however, after i ran and ran diligently like that, now that i’m going to graduate i turned out to be someone who gets angry and annoyed at everything. i get angry at the words the other opponent would throw in without any meaning. i’d get angry with a: “what do you know?”. little by little i hated meeting other people and i’m just preparing to find a job while only looking straight ahead. however …, i suddenly got this thought: why am i comparing my own pain with other people’s suffering? why did i make other people’s misfortune the basis to my happiness? all of a sudden these words i heard years ago occurred to me again: “everyone lives like that. you’re not the only one having a hard time.” it seemed like i’d fall behind if i didn’t do anything, that i’d really become someone who’s oblivious to everything - casting a spell that everyone lives like that, that i’m not the only one having a tough time. i pressured and harassed myself. i couldn’t be caring to myself. i was only too strict to myself. i couldn’t love myself, the one that needed love the most. at last, i want to say this to myself: “you lived diligently. more than anybody else you lived fiercely. it’s alright. you can rest now.” today, my status message: “it’s alright even if you don’t do anything.

jonghyun: “everyone lives like that, you’re not the only one having a hard time.” these words …, i think it’s the most wrong way of consolation in the world. the comparing with the other opponent, with different people. you know how there are these words? “live with the courage to die”; well …, these words? i think it’s the worst way of consolation. comfort …, to someone who’s having a hard time, someone who’s gloomy / depressed, to an exhausted person, to say: “when you get these thoughts, think of …, when you get those thoughts, courageously, do something different …, ya, right now, since you’re having a hard time like that: you’re exhausted, tired and having negative thoughts. i think it’d be good to quickly put that energy on the move and quickly take care of the work you need to get done.” to be honest, that person was aware of this too. they already know it’ll be solved by quickly moving on. they really immensely wish for it to be that way. however, it’s not working that way. there’s another thing other than the body’s wounds that you can see with your own eyes: it’s the heart’s wounds and, because of that, when comforting someone, i think one should think of how there’s certainly another existence, something that my eyes can’t see. of course, me too, while talking about this, since there are certainly words i gave to someone and wounds i’ve received from someone, i wanted to complain and talk a bit about this to our dear listeners. when comforting someone, rather than consoling them by comparing, whether comparing them to yourself or another person’s situation, i think it’d be nice to just have a talk about that person, them solely.

Drama Kisses ( Aren’t Real ) // Mark Lee

1st Post from Admin Forest ♡ 

Originally posted by tybeoji

“It’s totally fate!” Your over excited best friend exclaimed for the 5th time.

 You rolled your eyes as you retrieved your books from your locker, then shut the door with a slam and looked at her; “I’ve already told you, it’s just a stage kiss. It doesn’t mean anything.” You explained, but she didn’t even bat an eyelash.

“Yea, you say that, but I know in your heart that you WANT it to mean something.” She pressed on, giving you a wink.

You ignored the pink hue that had tinted your cheeks. and started trudging to the next class you had.Just like always, your friend was right.

Drama, and acting were your passion. You loved to take on different roles, each more exciting or thrilling than the last.

And coincidentally, so did your not-so-little crush, Mark Lee.

He wasn’t the most popular guy in school, no he was that guy’s best friend. Popular nonetheless, just not as much.

He had a very calming aura that could make even the tensest person relax, and it drew people to him, including you.

You both had been in the same drama class since freshman year, and had been in a fair amount of plays, and musicals together.

However, in those shows, there had never been a time where you both had the two leading male and female roles.

This time it was different. Your school was putting on a production of Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet.

It was one of your all time favorites, and you just knew that you wanted to be Juliet.

You had put your heart, and soul into the audition, impressing your teacher, and causing fury, and jealously to bubble in the stomachs of the other girls auditioning.

After your performance, you stepped down from the stage, and went back to the dressing rooms to collect your bag and some books. When you stepped out, a voice startled you.

“You were amazing up there, I could feel your passion.” Mark said, leaning against the wall, with his hands lazily shoved in the pockets of his worn out ripped jeans.

He offered you a shy smiled, which you returned. “Thanks, I just hope it was good enough to land me the part.” You replied, a light blush grazing your cheeks as Mark began to walk with you, making your heart pound.

“If you don’t get it, I’ll smack the teacher myself. You really deserve it.” He grinned playfully.

A giggle slipped past your lips before you could stop it and you looked down bashfully at the floor. “Thank you, again. It really means a lot to me.” You said quietly.

Mark stopped outside of the boys dressing room. “No problem, and who knows, maybe I’ll be your Romeo.” He said slyly, before entering the room, letting the door shut behind him.

If you had been blushing before, it was nothing compared to the deep tomato color you were at that moment.

As fate works in wonderful ways, you did end up receiving the role of Juliet. And seeing as how the universe likes to mess with people’s lives, Mark had been given the part of Romeo.

All the girls had given you dirty looks the moment the cast list was posted, but you brushed them off.

With your best friend by your side, you nervously scanned the list for your name.

Y/N L/N – Juliet

Your friend squealed, and crushed you in a hug. You were beyond happy of course, but something threw you off. It was the name below yours.

Mark Lee – Romeo

All of a sudden, Mark was beside you, running his eyes down the list with his posse behind him.

Once he saw his name, he grinned widely and turned to his friends.

“I got the part!” He yelled, excitement twinkling is his eyes. His best friend, Donghyuck, fist bumped him and looked at the list himself while the rest of their group congratulated him.

“Oh lookie here! Mark gets to lock lips with Y/N!” He smirked at you, and Mark shoved him.

“Shut up man, leave her alone.” He said quietly as he dragged the younger boy to the door, flashing you an apologetic smile before exiting the room with the others following.

Your best friend nudged your ribs. “Funny how the world works huh? C'mon, let’s go celebrate.” She said, and you allowed her to pull you to the exit.

When the day of the play finally arrived, you were more nervous than you ever had been for a show.

Rehearsals were more calm, but this time, it was for real.

Meaning, you and Mark would actually kiss.

During practice, your lips never touched, just hovered because the director said it was “bad luck”.

Your palms were sweaty and you couldn’t stop your hands from tugging at the collar of the dress you had on.

The theater was already packed full when you peeked from backstage.

You could see your parents, friends, and even your grandparents. A hand grabbing your shoulder snapped you back into reality and you came face to face with the devil himself.

Mark’s face held a steady grin. “Are you ready?” He asked giddily, bouncing on his heels.

All the saliva dried from your tongue, so you found yourself nodding instead of speaking.

“Well, break a leg out there! You’re gonna do great!"His encouraging words made your confidence boost up a bit and you let out the breath you didn’t notice you were holding.

"Thanks, you too.” Was your response.

The lights went down and the blinding spot lights flashed. Taking a deep breath, you gathered as much courage as you could, then walked out.


Soon the play was nearing an end, and the time for the kiss scene was close.

The heart beat in your chest was beating erratically while you desperately tried to hype yourself up in your head.

The feelings of nervousness and excitement were swirling around in the pit of your stomach, making you dizzy.

Mark stepped towards you, and gently cupped your cheeks, treating you as if you were made of the most fragile glass, the familiar motion bringing back memories from previous rehearsals.

Almost like he could sense the anxious vibes radiating off your body, Mark flashed a quick smile, before leaning towards you.

Your hands rested on his shoulders, and you prayed that you weren’t squeezing them in a death grip.

After what felt like years but was only seconds, your lips finally came in contact with Mark’s.

They were plush, soft, and tasted faintly of his vanilla chapstick.

You willed all those shaky feelings from your mind, and really put all your passion into the kiss.

Mark felt like he was floating, not knowing you felt the same.

He almost forgot that you both were just acting, and slowly pulled away, savoring every last second.

As the scene came to an end, and loud applause erupted from the audience, he knew he wouldn’t forget the taste of your strawberry lip gloss.

Backstage was less hectic and busy than before the show, but all the actors and actresses were buzzing in happiness. “Good job all of you! That was spectacular!” The director said, causing the cast to cheer for all their hardwork.

Mark was looking around until he finally spotted you, changed into your casual clothes while talking to your best friend.

He walked over in a rush, just as your friend had gone. “Uh…h-hey.” He stuttered out, mentally slapping himself.

Lucky for him, you smiled and sat up straighter. “Hi.”

Awkwardly rubbing the back of his head, he struggled to find his words. “That kiss was…really something. I could feel the emotion.” He complimented, watching as your cheeks flushed.

“Well, that means I’m a good actress right?” You asked playfully.

“Of course! You’re one of the best actresses I’ve ever seen!” Mark said, not realizing what he said until he said it.

His words made your heart flutter and soar even higher in the cloud you felt you were on. Your lips still tingled from the kiss.

“Funny how something that looks real, means nothing.” You let out, looking away.

Mark frowned a bit.

“It meant something to me…” he mumbled shyly.

Your eyes were saucers when you heard him. “Really?!”

He only nodded, clearly embarrassed. “Yea, I mean I’ve only had a crush on you since 9th grade, so…” he explained with a shrug.

Pink dusted over his face and spread to the tips of his ears.

“Well then, why don’t we hang out sometimes. Maybe we can practice some lines together?” You suggested, a bright grin glued onto your face.

He met your eyes and nodded eagerly. “Y-Yea that sounds great!”

“And to think I was so nervous about a kiss…” you thought to yourself

After all, who said drama kisses mean nothing?

anonymous asked:

So here is the thing with your guys going down with anons having no "Proof" and yet you do. First of all your proof is flawed but I will go through that as I find it. But most of all we get what 300 characters to "prove" our point- you get unlimited. The game is unequal. So come off Anon? I've tried but I was treated w/such hate & threats it isn't worth it. Ya'll think you are so innocent but every one that I have tried to "chat" with like adults has been a rude teenager who goes off topic.

#2: Fail #2. The Brian photo was taken in 2013. The photo you posted is Darren with Lena Hall was taken fall 2016 during the Touring Hedwig. In any event, it doesn’t matter because Darren didn’t have muscular thighs until he started Hedwig in April 2015. Presumable the earliest he started working out was January 2015. In fact he just said in an interview that during Glee he was in the worst shape of his life.

#3: Fail #3 Hands. 1. There appears to be a filter on the photo because all of the colors are richer. 2. That isn’t Chris in the photo it is Will (or Darren if you are right) . Chris wrote “So Much Love” I don’t think he was talking about simply his cat. He meant both the cat and the man holding him 3. You didn’t even compare Will’s fingers so “Three: Not Done”

#4: Fail #4 You have to compare long sleeve to long sleeve if you are looking at fit & pucker cuz fabric acts differently if it is short or long. The pull from the weight of a long sleeve is different & short sleeve shirts fit differently. But every shirt you show of Darren has large creases in his shoulders that aren’t apparent in the Brain photo so I don’t know what you are looking at but they don’t match at all. This one blows my mind because your Darren photos ALL don’t match Brian photo at all

#5: The photo of Chris with the NY story was taken that day as it was what he wore in photos take that day. His arms are MUCH bigger now then they were then. But I don’t believe it is Chris anyway so it doesn’t really matter.

i decided to group these all together since they came from the same anon.

well first off, it seems that you’ve managed to prove your points in only five asks, despite the 500 character limit and the 10 asks you can ask per hour. if you wanted to write more, then you could have easily done so with the other five asks you had left. 

obviously you don’t like us CCers given with the way you’ve described us as “rude [teenagers] who [go] off topic” so i’m not surprised that you’ve come into my ask to argue with me about the post. 

speaking of said post, how about we talk about it? since you clearly had so much to say about it.

“Fail #2. The Brian photo was taken in 2013. The photo you posted is Darren with Lena Hall was taken fall 2016 during the Touring Hedwig. In any event, it doesn’t matter because Darren didn’t have muscular thighs until he started Hedwig in April 2015. Presumable the earliest he started working out was January 2015. In fact he just said in an interview that during Glee he was in the worst shape of his life.”

my apologies, nonnie. i should have used pictures of Darren from 2013, my bad. to make up for it, i’ll post some pictures of him from 2012—2013 right here:

but of course he was out of shape at the time, so he couldn’t have had these thighs until 2015. *note sarcasm.*

Darren has always had muscular thighs, and when he began to work out for his run on Hedwig, they only became more defined. but that does not erase the fact that he had muscular thighs during his run on Glee, despite not being in shape.

“Fail #3 Hands. 1. There appears to be a filter on the photo because all of the colors are richer. 2. That isn’t Chris in the photo it is Will (or Darren if you are right) . Chris wrote “So Much Love” I don’t think he was talking about simply his cat. He meant both the cat and the man holding him 3. You didn’t even compare Will’s fingers so “Three: Not Done"”

again, my apologies, nonnie. let me add some pictures of Will’s hands:

Will’s fingers are similar to Chris’s, and even though there was a filter, it wouldn’t make either of their hands (especially the knuckles) that red unless they already had some sort of faint pinkish tint to them, and they don’t.

yet look at Darren’s hands, and pay close attention to his knuckles:

they already have that pinkish tint to them. now you’re probably gonna think about the filter again, so i took it upon myself to test out all the IG filters that could match the one in the Brian photo:

notice how those filters emphasize the pink tint on Darren’s knuckles (especially on his right hand), making them look darker, verging a bit into a light red. now personally, i don’t think any of these filters match exactly with the one in the Brian photo, but Chris definitely uses IG filters for a majority of his posts. all the other filters were too light to be the one in Brian’s photo, but these were the closest ones to it.

so three, done.

“Fail #4 You have to compare long sleeve to long sleeve if you are looking at fit & pucker cuz fabric acts differently if it is short or long. The pull from the weight of a long sleeve is different & short sleeve shirts fit differently. But every shirt you show of Darren has large creases in his shoulders that aren’t apparent in the Brain photo so I don’t know what you are looking at but they don’t match at all. This one blows my mind because your Darren photos ALL don’t match Brian photo at all”

once again, my apologies. 

here’s Darren in a long sleeve that’s similar to the one in the photo (since you’ll probably make a fit if it was a suit, button up, sweater, etc.):

you’re right, short sleeves and long sleeves fit differently. the shirt in this photo doesn’t have large creases underneath his arms, just like the Brian photo.

This one blows my mind because your Darren photos ALL don’t match Brian photo at all”

okay let me just go find another photo of Darren holding Brian, oh wait.

there’s none.

of course Darren’s photos aren’t going to match the Brian photo, so not really sure how that blows your mind. so unless you just so happen to magically have another photo of him holding Brian, that argument in itself is invalid. 

“The photo of Chris with the NY story was taken that day as it was what he wore in photos take that day. His arms are MUCH bigger now then they were then. But I don’t believe it is Chris anyway so it doesn’t really matter.”

i’m very aware of when that photo of Chris with the NY story was taken, i was just using it as an example of his body type. which is why i added in the photo of him in the disneyland shirt at rehearsal that was taken and posted five months before the Brian photo.

Chris is still bulky as hell even in that photo, but just like Darren with his legs, his body became more defined/bulkier. so i’m honestly not sure why you used that as an argument when i clearly made the comparison of this photo, AND the one of him and Will, with the Brian photo in that post.

“But I don’t believe it is Chris anyway so it doesn’t really matter.”

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

then why make the argument?????

okay, anyways, i know this post and my arguments will not affect you or your opinion, but your arguments will not change mine either. if you believe it’s Will, then go ahead and do so. i’ve had multiple anons before that tried arguing with me (in a very out of pocket way, which is what prompted me to make that post in the first place) and i didn’t want to waste my time on them individually. but since you stated some arguments that summed up everyone else’s, i decided to answer these and put it to rest. 

also, if you didn’t like the post since it had so many flaws and “fails” in it, why bother? i’ve never understood that about the anons that either send us hate or argue with us. if you don’t like us and our way of thinking, why do you still fuck with us and our blogs? what is your goal here? to change our minds and have us think “realistically”? like in order for you to find those “fails” and make arguments surrounding them, you really had to read through that post and analyze it, so it blows my mind that you clearly don’t like me or the rest of the CC family, yet you spent your time on my post and our blogs (since you’ve tried talking to our “rude teenager” asses).

piece of advice for all you nonnies: if you don’t like us, our blogs, our posts, our theories, our way of thinking, our evidence, etc. because you think it’s dumb, stupid, ridiculous, annoying, and so on, literally just don’t pay any fucking attention to us. block us, ignore us, something so that we’re not popping up in your life. if some of us have been hostile to you as you say, maybe it’s because you’ve been hostile to us and constantly send us hate to the point where we’re irritated and annoyed by it because honestly? what the fuck are you trying to get at or achieve by arguing with us?

stay on your lane, and we’ll stay on ours. we don’t have to intersect with each other.

anyways, that’s all. deuces.

Shield-maiden Within

Summary: Reader is a Saxon woman who doesn’t like the whole ‘a woman can’t do what men do’ thing and so she runs away… with the vikings, and Bjorn trains her.

Characters: Reader, Bjorn Ironside, Ragnar Lothrbrok, Floki

Fandom: Vikings

Word Count: 1936

Disney Movie Writing Challenge, @that-was-not-supposed-to-happen 

AN: I think this is the longest thing I have ever written but I hope you guys still like it even thought the ending is crap…

Originally posted by jonsofwinterfell

Keep reading

Barnes’ Books - Chapter 9

In which pretty much everyone is sad. Sorry.

Previous chapters on the Masterlist

When I’m sure they’ve gone, I go back to the shop. I don’t want to go home, alone, and there’s a part of me hoping there’ll be a note from Bucky, something to hold on to.  There isn’t.  Steve’s playing with something on the floor when I walk in, scrabbling under the counter, but she runs over to me when I walk in.  I shut all the blinds and lock the door, leaving the light off, then curl up in a chair, and cry.

I cry for my own stupidity, for letting myself fall for someone; for having nothing else in my life; for James, alone in the care home, away from his only family. I cry for a long time, until it hurts to breath, until my skin feels raw with the salt tears. Steve is sitting on the arm of the chair next to me, I’m curled up, hugging my knees, glad that my joints are aching and my clothes are digging in and I hurt. I want to hurt. It’s what I deserve.

Eventually, you have to stop crying. Your body stops for you, even when your heart carries on. I was exhausted, too tired to be angry with myself any more. Too tired to go home. So I did something I probably shouldn’t have. I tucked Steve under one arm, and walked up the stairs into the flat. Kicking off my jeans, I lay down in the bed, just for a little bit, and tried to pretend Bucky was there with me.

Of course, I fell fast asleep and woke the next morning, confused and sore.  I blinked and looked around, then leapt out of bed, ashamed. In the bathroom I confronted the damage that the tears had wrought.  My eyes were red and swollen, my cheeks looked rough and sore. The rest of me looked as disastrous as always. I pulled on yesterday’s jeans and splashed some water on my face, but deep down I didn’t care.

Downstairs, I fed Steve again but she didn’t come when I called. Going out into the shop, I found her scrabbling under the counter again but when I shook her food box, she scampered in as if she hadn’t eaten for a week.

I opened the shop every day that week, went through the motions of selling and stocking and locking up. I smiled and made coffee and played with children, and then at night I went home to my own flat and sat in the dark alone. I visited James every day but the spark had gone out of both our lives and I had little to tell him. I ate badly – either nothing, or too much – and I didn’t sleep, and I cried.

On Friday, I got a text from Bucky. It was short, to the point. It hurt. ‘Accountant coming Monday. That OK? B.’  I replied saying it was fine, but he didn’t respond.  And so on Monday, after a lonely weekend, where I’d drunk alone, too much, and forgotten to eat, the accountant came. I showed him the accounts notebook, the system that Bucky had set up to record orders, the cashing up. He nodded, took away receipts, muttered about valuations.

On Tuesday, another text. ‘Estate agent coming Thursday. That OK?’ Estate agent. So Bucky meant to sell the shop? Sell James’ home, my job. The place where he grew up, where he was happy.  I cried more, and drank more. Yet again I replied and yet again he didn’t respond.

I replayed every memory of the weeks we’d spent together, and doubted every one.  I’d been kidding myself that Bucky was my friend. I told myself I had nothing to offer, nothing anyone would want. I was a convenient shop assistant, a favour to his Granddad. A joke. I was ‘nothing compared to’ his fiancée.

James was doing little better than I was. I made sure to visit him, it was the one thing every day that mattered to me.  He looked old and sad, and spent a lot of time talking about the family that had gone, about the friends he’d lost. He asked me every day if I’d heard from Bucky, but I didn’t tell him about the estate agent.

On Thursday, I woke up when the alarm went off, but I couldn’t move. What I’d thought was a cold coming on the day before had worsened. A regime of poor food, excess alcohol, poor sleep, and depression, had left me susceptible to every virus. I was icily cold then feverishly hot, my body aching unbearably.  My head throbbed every time I coughed, which was often. I tried to stand but felt so weak that my legs trembled and I fell back onto the bed, shaking. I felt sick and sore.  My last coherent thought before I fell into a fevered sleep was Bucky.  I sent him a text – ‘cant open shop, agent, ill im sorry’ – and then slept.

The only time I left my bed on Thursday or Friday, was to crawl to the bathroom to be sick. Each movement left me weaker, my head throbbing, my brain in a fog. I drank a little water from the tap but couldn’t have made it to the kitchen to get a glass. I slept, or lay half-conscious, unable to easily separate reality from fever-delirium.  At one point, late on Friday, I heard my name being called, and a loud banging. The noise hurt my head, so I buried it under the pillow where the sweat stuck hair to my face. I slept again.

By Saturday morning, I was seriously dehydrated, although I couldn’t have said as much. My cough was rattling through me, leaving my chest aching. I was retching but there was nothing there.  I heard the banging again, and my name, but was too weary to even move. I shut my eyes against the light seeping into the room around my curtains.  When I opened them again, Bucky was standing there. Another hallucination.

He crouched down beside the bed, resting the back of his fingers on my forehead.  Against my overheated skin, his hand felt as cold as metal. I tried to say his name, but my tongue was too dry and stuck to the roof of my mouth. I blinked, and the hallucination was gone, so I shut my eyes to sleep.

A moment later, I felt an arm snake around the back of my neck, and a glass being held to my mouth, a trickle of water wetting my lips.  I opened my mouth to gulp the water down, and opened my eyes to see Bucky again. He was in a suit, the tie undone and askew, and was scowling.  Too soon, he took the glass away, and laid my head back down. He sat down on the edge of the bed and I tried to stay awake to look at him. He twisted to look at me.

“I was worried. You didn’t answer my calls or texts. Nobody answered the door yesterday. I had to lie to a locksmith and say I’d lost my keys, to get in,” he said, watching me. This was a great hallucination.  He put his hand out and brushed some of the sweaty hair off my face. I fell asleep again as he stroked my face.

When I woke up, the hallucination had gone. I felt slightly less wretched than before, although the difference was slight. I turned my head a little to ease my stiff neck, and noticed a glass of water by the bed.  I knew I hadn’t put it there, but all I could think of was how nice it would be to drink. I pulled myself upright, my arms trembling with the effort, and gulped down the water. It was icy cold and felt delicious on my sore throat. I lay back, half-upright, and looked around the room. It looked different. My head hurt to think so it took a while, but I realised that it was… tidy.

Since Bucky had left, I’d taken to coming in from work, throwing my clothes in the corner, and getting into bed with a bottle of wine.  The dirty clothes were all gone now, and the collection of wine bottles and glasses too.  I swung around in bed and stood on trembling legs, walked slowly to the bedroom door. I had to hold onto the doorframe and walls as I left my bedroom and turned into the living room. It was only a small flat but it felt like a marathon to walk that far. There was a strange smell, and a clattering noise from the kitchen. I turned into the doorway to see a man’s back. He was standing by the stove, stirring a pot, and humming to himself. There was clean washing up stacked beside the sink and the washing machine was churning.


He turned and saw me. It was Bucky, of course.  I was leaning on the doorway, worn out with illness, tiredness and confusion.

“Hey, you should not be out of bed,” he said, stepping across the kitchen to put an arm around me. “Come on, sit down for a second.” He pulled out a chair and I slumped into it.  He crouched at my feet, looking up at me, his eyes an intense blue.  “Give me a minute, I’ll change your bed.”

Before I could speak, he’d stood and walked past me.  I heard cupboards opening and closing – luckily my flat was small enough there weren’t many places to look – then silence.  A few minutes later, Bucky returned.  I stood, holding onto the chair.  Other than his name, I still hadn’t spoken. I started walking, still unsure exactly what was going on, why he was here, but I was too weak still and my knees gave way.

Before I could hit the ground, Bucky’s arms were around me. He lifted me up easily and carried me through to my room. Putting me down on the bed, I felt the cool crispness of fresh linen, such a change from the hot, tangled, sweaty sheets I’d been lying on. My eyes closed as the cold pillow comforted my head, but as I drifted off to sleep, I was sure I felt someone kiss my cheek.

When I next woke, the light coming through the curtains was softer, as if evening was coming. I’d slept more peacefully, the fever breaking at last although I still felt limp and exhausted.  There was another glass of water by the bed, and again I eagerly gulped it down.  The flat was silent and I was starting to doubt my own mind.  Carefully I got up again and walked out, on legs as weak as a newborn lamb’s.

In the living room, Bucky was sitting on the couch, legs up on the coffee table.  He was reading a book and rubbing something on his lap. For a moment, I flushed brightly, wondering what he was doing, before I realised he had a cat on his lap. Steve.  Bucky and Steve were in my apartment.  I felt lost.

I coughed, harshly, and Bucky turned around, the movement disturbing Steve who stretched and meowed.

“Hey sleepyhead! Any better? Can I get some medicine into you? You’ve fallen asleep every time I’ve tried.” He stood, lifting Steve onto the couch, and walked into the kitchen as he spoke. I followed, sitting down in the chair again, chilled and tired.

“What are you doing here Bucky?” I asked, my voice raspy and sore.  He put some paracetamol and another glass of water beside me, nodding at me to take them, then pulled out another chair, sitting near enough that our knees were almost touching.

“I told you. I couldn’t get hold of you and you’d said you were ill. I was worried. So I came to look after you.”

I couldn’t quite process it. He gave me bits of information as he ran me a bath, found me clean pyjamas. He sat outside the bathroom door talking as I lay in the bath, making sure I didn’t fall asleep and drown. He continued talking as I sat back in bed, exhausted but feeling so much better for being clean, and gave me home-made soup to eat. It was as if he hadn’t been able to speak for the last two weeks, and needed to let everything out.

“When you didn’t reply to my note, I thought I’d blown it, our friendship, so I tried to keep it business-like, but, I don’t know, things felt different back at home,” he said, but before he could continue, I broke in.

“What note? You didn’t leave one.”

“Before we left. I came down out of the flat with Maria and you were gone, so I left you a note.” I turned in the bath, staring at the doorway, as if I could see him through the wood.  

“There was no note. I went back to the shop after you’d gone. There was no note.” I climbed gingerly out of the bath, the heat having sapped the last of my strength, and half-heartedly dried myself, before pulling pyjamas onto damp skin.  As I started to clean my teeth, Bucky spoke again.

“I left a note, on the counter. Next to Steve.” A pause. “Saying I was sorry. Asking you to call me if you’d still be my friend. Telling you I needed a friend.”

I pulled the bathroom door open, and he looked up. He was sitting on a dining chair he’d pulled up outside the door, elbows resting on knees, head resting on hands.  Now that water and rest had cleared my head a little, I could really see him.  He looked terrible. His skin was grey, eyes red-lined, and the frown between his eyes was deep again.

“I never got that,” I said, and as if on cue, Steve rounded the corner, ignoring us both as he walked into my room and jumped on the bed.  I remembered the way Steve had scratched at something under the counter in the shop when I’d been there.  “Steve. She must have chased it.”

Bucky let out a groan of exasperation as I climbed into bed, too tired and emotional to give a thought to Bucky being in my bedroom.  He nudged the cat with his hand and she glared at him, before moving over and climbing onto my lap. I felt teary, in that post-illness way, when every emotion seems too raw, your nerves exposed. I kept my head down and stroked Steve, watching as one or two tears darkened her fur.  

I felt the bed move and looked up to see Bucky sitting down. He looked at me, then lay back, on top of the duvet, resting his head back against the headboard. He looked exhausted, drained.

“Out of interest, if you’d got the note…?”

“I’d have replied. I’d have called.”

His eyes closed, briefly, and his face seemed to relax.  Silence fell, but it wasn’t uncomfortable.  Steve purred on my lap, and my skin tingled from the hot bath. I was tired but had slept too much to sleep again just yet.

“Buck, why did you come all this way?”

He turned his head on the pillow to look at me. “I told you. I was worried. About you, and about Granddad. You were ill. The nurses say he’s gone downhill.”

I nodded.  “He has. I’m sorry.  To be honest, you look like you have too.”

He smiled, briefly.  “I’m fine. Work stress is all.” I didn’t believe him.

“If you need a friend, I’m here to listen. And thank you. For coming here, for taking care of me.”

For a moment, just a moment, I thought he was going to talk. He needed to, it felt as if there was a flood of words dammed up inside him, but before he could sleep, I was wracked with another bout of coughing, sending Steve off my lap and leaving me doubled over and struggling to breathe.  By the time I was calm again, Bucky had stood.  

“You need to sleep. You’re not well.” He leant over and kissed my forehead, leaving my skin tingling. Before I could speak again, he’d left the room, and I heard the flat door shut.

@avengermama @heartfulloffandoms @knittingknerdy @eyeofdionysus @sian22redux  @itsemz

@sebuttianstans @emilyevanston @gloriavox @mculove1 @beccaanne814-blog  @buckysberrie @avengerofyourheart

@gemini6585 @msmarvelchick @mitra-k-w @marvelingatthewonder @k8y2886 @nikkitia7 

@gingerrootknits @magicalstarsandflowers @iwillbeinmynest @heytherepartner @lbouvet @bellenuit45 

@whatsbetterthanfantasy @canumoveyourseatup-no @therealme13posts 

@peoniesinmyhair @pixierox101 @jennymagicalheart @buckyappreciationsociety  @blacwings-and-bucky-barnes​ @chipilerendi @50shadesofyes @cupcakewarriors2  @thedreamingowl

@thatcormiergirl @imhereforbvcky @magickandmoons @learisa @delicatecapnerd @saffreelove @vaisabu @kenya-17

@siobhanrebecca  @hellomissmabel @independentgirl @amrita31199 @sebbeanstan  @angryschnauzer @abbybills22

[Don’t Lose Heart]

Series: Boku no Hero Academia
Pairing: Todomomo. 
Setting: Canon.
Genre(s): Romance, hurt/comfort. 

A/N: so I just finished reading the BNHA manga in two days and I’m not used to character/ship names yet, but I really want to start writing in the fandom. So, consider this my way of dipping a toe in foreign waters before letting the waves pull me in.

Summary: When random allocation places Todoroki as her opponent, Momo begins to lose face. 

Momo’s heartbeat was deafening. A hush stole into the common room, leaving her alone with the quiet. A half-moon watched over her through the window, sending shadows skittering across the floor. Dust swirled and scattered in the cool air. Though silent with the absence of Momo’s classmates, the room had never seemed so obnoxiously loud. Hidden somewhere in the quiet, Aizawa’s voice was a faded ringing in her ears that pulsed in and out of her head.

Today, I’m going to assign each of you an opponent at random

The class had cheered – of course they had. This was an opportunity to display their special moves. An opportunity to advance and grow. To challenge their peers, their friends, and move forward together.  

Details of the match will be given on the grounds tomorrow morning. Since this is a demonstration of your technique and not an examination of your response time, you’ll have the opportunity to form strategies before class tomorrow. Use this time wisely. 

‘A strategy…against Todoroki.’ Momo let out a long breath she’d been holding in. ‘I wonder what kind of strategy he’ll use against me.’

Would someone like Todoroki even need a strategy? In terms of battle, he was strong enough to fend off her attacks. Momo’s grades were higher than Todoroki’s, but he was arguably more suited to practical battles than she was. Compared to Todoroki, Momo was…

‘You can’t sleep either?’

Momo started at the sound of footsteps padding across the floor behind her. Craning her neck to glance over the back of the couch, she spotted Todoroki approaching from behind. Flecks of hair stood out in a disarray, telltale signs of his attempt to sleep. It seemed strange to Momo that he’d have any trouble at all. 

At least he’d made it to bed, she thought. That was more than she’d managed to do.

‘Normally, whenever we participate in practical events, the class is thrown into it spontaneously. Our pairings are decided on the day and we’re forced to think on our feet.’ Momo’s gaze flicked away from Todoroki’s as he sat down beside her. ‘Now that I have time to think…it’s like my thoughts have abandoned me. I can’t create a strategy like this.’

‘A creator who can’t create,’ Todoroki mumbled. ‘Sounds tough.’

Momo laced her fingers together on her lap. ‘I told myself that I would keep pushing forward of my own volition,’ she said. ‘I don’t want to chase someone else’s back for the rest of my life. I want to look past them, into the distance, and reach for my own future. But, while trying to focus on strategy, I fall back into the same pattern again. Of comparing myself to the others. To…you.’

Todoroki’s lips threatened a smile that he seemed to suppress out of respect for Momo’s feelings. Instead, he leaned back on the couch and let out a quiet yawn. Contagious as it was, Momo was too frustrated to let it tempt her into slumber. 

‘So,’ she started, averting her gaze back to his, ‘what’s keeping you up so late?’

Todoroki seemed to consider before answering. ‘I’m looking forward to it.’

Momo could only stare at him.

‘To our battle,’ he explained.  

Momo’s heart gave a subtle flutter that only seemed to spread the nausea in her stomach. ‘You’re looking forward to it?’

‘Yeah,’ he said, shifting towards her. 

When their knees touched, Momo became suddenly aware of his presence, and of the way she’d poured her feelings out without ever stopping to see if he was interested. All at once she felt exposed and vulnerable – and just a tad embarrassed about what she’d blurted out. 

‘I’m not sure I’ll be much of an opponent for you,’ she confessed. ‘I’m not…’

Todoroki’s expression hardened. He leveled his gaze with hers, luring her deep into eyes that burned like ice on flesh. ‘Tomorrow, I won’t be holding back. That’s what I came to tell you.’

A chill danced up Momo’s spine. ‘I…’

‘If you’re not here to give it your all, then leave.’

When he stood, Momo latched onto his wrist, stopping him in his tracks. ‘I’ll make you use both sides,’ she challenged, letting her eyes flicker between his shoulders. ‘I’m going to give it my all. So much so that you’re forced to wield ice and fire if you want to beat me. That’s what a hero should do!’

Todoroki’s lips curved up into a smile. He turned to face her, placing a hand over the one she’d used to grab his wrist. Momo’s heart felt as though it might burst with the new lease of courage that kindled inside her. She’d been foolish to question things. It didn’t matter who her opponent was – they were all training to be heroes. They all needed to do their best for the sake of the lives they wanted to save. 

‘You’re not the only one who’s nervous,’ he told her. ‘One day, we won’t be surrounded by school walls anymore. We’ll be the ones tasked with saving people. As long as you give it your all tomorrow, you can face defeat knowing you tried your best. Losing now means you can correct your mistakes. One day, it’ll be the difference between life and death. It’s better to worry now than in the future, when people need you to win.’ Todoroki gave a reassuring nod. ‘Don’t question your abilities or your quirk. They’re part of you and will grow as you do. Heroes can’t afford to lose heart.’

Somehow, Todoroki seemed even cooler than before. Momo’s heart felt suddenly lighter, as though a weight had been lifted off her chest. Todoroki had come so far since they’d become classmates. Everyone was doing their best to mature and grow. She should do her best, too. 

Withdrawing her hand, Momo found herself unable to stop smiling. ‘My goal tomorrow is victory,’ she said. ‘Nothing less.’

Todoroki turned back towards the stairs. ‘Then you’d better get some sleep. I won’t forgive you if you tire in the middle of battle.’

Momo stared at his back as he left. The way he walked exuded confidence, but there was a hint of gentleness carried in the sound of his quiet footsteps. Why was it that a simple word from Todoroki made all the difference in the world? 

And had his shoulders…always been so broad? 

Reiner and Bertolt as Chess Players

I originally joked that there were very important spoilers here, but the reality is not really xD. Under the cut because it does discuss the most recent episode and it’s long. 

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Septiishu cuteness :3

Watching yesterday’s video of Jack and Wiishu inspired me to write this fluffy little ‘mini-fic’ - if you can even call it that xD I apologise in advance if I missed any typos, and I may or may not have broken the 4th wall at one point… :p this is my first time posting any kind of fic so… please be gentle with me :3 Hope you enjoy the cuteness ^-^ 

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I Am An Alpha Ch 3: I Can Do This, I Think...

“I can’t do this!” I groan as Jin drags me behind him through the forest. We spent most of the night figuring out where the black dragon’s home base is located and finding a quick path back to the camp so we, or I guess I mean they, can run back after. The land near the massive mansion reeks of them, not in a bad way it’s just so over whelming for me. I smell four wolves inside, three are unfamiliar and one is the wolf from yesterday. A small sigh of relief leaves my lips when I know the head alpha is not there, though that is a problem that Jin quickly realizes.

“The head alpha is out,” Jin informs the group, stopping us just behind the last row of trees that separate the forest from their main property.  There is a green house on one side of the mansion, I can smell flowers and fruits and vegetables. Even with the massive windows on the back of the house I can’t see a single person inside but I know they are here. “They know we’re here.”

“How can you tell?” Tae stares into the house with so much focus I feel like his eyes are going to pop out of his head.

“They are coming out,” Jin nods in the direction of the green house. Four figures step out and scan the forest line. Jin quickly tucks me behind him.

“Come out, come out where ever you are,” One sing songs. His voice sounds so warm and alluring I almost feel tempted to obey but Jin’s firm grip on my arm keeps me low.

Another sighs, already bored with the situation, “We know you are out there, don’t make us come look for you.”

“So many trespassers in two day? I wonder if they are with that mutt we cut up last night,” One chuckles in a deep voice.

My heart shatters at those words, “Cut up?” I echo.

“What a pretty voice,” The first voice purrs.

Another hums in agreement, “I wonder what pretty little creature it came from.”

“Should we go find out?”

The annoyed one voices his opinion, “I think we should just slaughter them now before the hyungs come back.”

“If you insist.”

“Wait,” Namjoon sighs as he stands up from cover. “No need to bring out your claws.”

“You are trespassing on our territory, that gives us permission to slit your throats without question. Lucky for you though, I’m feeling friendly today, now tell us what you are doing here.” The first voice demands.

“The rest of you stand too, I want to know who had the pretty voice,” The other commands. Jin pulls me up with him, still blocking me from view. The others join us, Joon is standing at point, Jin and Yoongi are flanking him with the other three standing at the back.

Namjoon bows as he introduces himself, “I am Kim Namjoon, we came looking for our pup, you caught him yesterday. We are sorry for being on your territory, we didn’t realize who you were until after. So if you could just give us back our pup we will be on our way.”

“Why would we just hand him over? We have a nice new chew toy.”

“We have something that you want more,” He offers.

One chuckles, “What do you have that we would want?”

“Your mate.”

There is a brief moment of silence before a chorus of growls come from the four alphas, “Mate.” I cling to Jin’s jacket, both out of fear and excitement. There is a silent fight for dominance as both my pack and my mates release their alpha pheromones. My omega instincts are screaming at me to drop to my knees and bare my neck, to submit just to get this to stop. I hold on to Jin tighter as my knees begin to loose their ability to hold me up. Jin, who is masking my scent, notices my suddenly trembling hands.

“Where is she? Do you have her with you? Where the fuck is she?” The first demands impatiently.

“We want our pup first, but since neither your head alpha, or your second in command, aren’t here we are going to have to come back later.”

“There is no way in hell we are letting you leave without handing over our mate.”

“We aren’t holding her back, she’s here for the pup as well,” Jin tells them, slipping a hand behind his back he offers it to me for stability and comfort. I accept it and let out a breath I didn’t even realize I was holding. “Please reel your pheromones in though, you are scaring her.”

“Why can’t we smell her?” The first whines almost desperately.

“I’m masking her scent with mine.”

“Stop it,” Another snaps.

“It makes her feel safe, so no.”

One growls, “We would never hurt her.”

Jin scoffs, “Your head alpha almost killed her thirty years ago. You,” Jin raises his free hand to gesture to one of them, “you almost attacked her yesterday.”


“Yes, you. But you missed her and attacked our pup instead.”

“Can we at least see her?”

“I don’t know,” Jin hums, “It’s all up to her. Do you want to see them Insoo-ya?”

I gulp, “As long as they don’t freak out or anything.”

“Wait,” Joon stops me, “Maybe it’s better if they don’t see you yet. I will be harder for both parties when we have to leave.”

“Where the hell do you think you’ll be going with our mate?” Someone barks, again I find myself under a massive amount of pressure. I hold Jin’s hand tighter.

“Control your anger!” Jin snaps back.

Namjoon gives his second in command a stern look before turning around to face the four men, “We aren’t running away, we are just waiting until your alpha comes back. I figure we should leave since none of you seem to be able to control your emotions which means Insoo is struggling to even breath with so much alpha pheromone in the air.”

“We will call him, just don’t leave.”

“Will you at least go inside or something?” Yoongi suggests, “None of us are enjoying the hostile atmosphere and at this point you are going to give her panic attack.”

The four men are silent for a moment before one speaks for all of them, “As long as we have your word not to run.”

“We came to you for our pup, we aren’t leaving without him.” Joon tells them.

“Does that mean we can see her? Since you won’t be leaving now?” One says hopefully.

“Insoo?” Jin wonders.

“I really want to peek,” I admit meekly. My pack is watching me intently, this isn’t my normal personality, I’ve always been strong and brave, not like this. I take a deep breath and take a shaky step to the side to look around Jin. The four men are standing a few yards away from the forest, watching with an intense stare. Three are really tall, about Namjoon’s height or a little taller. The other is short but only by a few inches, he’s absolutely beautiful, I mean they all are, but he is strikingly so. I’m surprised to see faded pink hair and darkly outlined eyes but they fit him so well, it makes him appear other worldly.

The tallest of the group is to his right, this one has tan skin and bags under his eyes. He doesn’t make me think of a wolf, maybe a cat or possibly a bird. Next to him is slightly shorter with a scary looking face. I find myself actually taking a step back when our eyes lock. He is the one from the forest, I can feel his familiar scent calling to me, drawing me in again. His hair is a light blond, beautiful pale skin stands out against the two tan men standing on either side of him. The other tan boy on his right has soft features compared to the other but he looks just as dangerous. Jin has to hold my hand to keep me form taking another step back.

“So beautiful,” The pink haired man purrs taking a step closer.

“Hello little wolf,” The next one coos. The other two just continue to stare. “What is your name?”

“Insoo,” I say softly.

He smiles, “So pretty, I’m Tao, this is our hyung Baekhyun. These two are our youngest pack members, Sehun and Jongin.”

I gulp, “Hello.”

Their eyes turn a brilliant gold.

“Hyung,” The youngest, Sehun, says with a cold voice.

“Sehun,” Baekhyun says with a obviously forced calm voice. “We have to wait for Kris hyung to get home, you should go call him.”


“But nothing,” The eldest says sternly, “go.”

With that the boy nods and turns to leave, not before giving me one last glance. Even his stare seems so cold, I wonder what I could have done to earn such a frightening look. “Sorry about him, he’s still so young but you can understand that. This pup of yours, he’s younger than our Sehun, he must be quiet a handful.”

Joon shakes his head, “He’s pretty well behaved. We were pretty strict since that is how we were raised but he never really caused any problems.”

“Um,” I open my mouth to ask a question but quickly close it when all eyes switch to me.

“Go ahead little wolf,” Baekhyun urges with a sweet smile that reminds me vaguely of Tae’s.

I take a deep breath to calm my pounding heart, “You didn’t hurt him did you? You didn’t cut up my little pup, did you?”

“Your pup?” Jongin finally speaks, his is like ice as he glares daggers as Jin.

“He is not really her pup,” Namjoon clarifies, “She raised him since he was a child so she considers herself his mother.”

“How long have you all been together?” Tao wonders.

“Over one hundred years for most of us. Insoo has been with us for about 109, the three younger than her about 70 to 50. Jungkook was the one she took responsibility for.”

Baekhyun’s brow furrows, “109 years? How have we not found you?”

“We wandered frequently with a larger pack for most of that time,” Jin explains simply.

“You said something about our leader attacking her, when did that happen?”

“It was thirty years ago, he tackled her and almost ripped open her throat.”

“Excuse me,” I call their attention hesitantly.

“Yes my little wolf?” Baekhyun gives me a kind smile.

“Our pup, Jungkook, is he okay? Could I see him?”

The three men share a look but Baekhyun’s smile doesn’t falter, “If you want to come in, of course you can. But because of certain  rules I’m not going to bring him out yet.”

“How is he?”

“He’s fine,” Jongin answers shortly.

“How about you?” Tao asks, “Are you okay? Are you hungry or cold? Would you like to come in and warm up?”

I tuck myself against Jin’s side, “I’m fine thank you. I’ll just stay out here with my pack.” I watch as most of the warmth in his eyes fades to a obvious distaste for me actions. His hands clench to fists at his side and his jaw is clenched.

“As you wish, we will be inside if you need anything,” Baekhyun nods curtly and begins pulling the stubborn younger boys inside with him. As soon as they are gone I drop to my knees, ignoring the cold seeping into my jeans. Even though I already miss my mates and yearn for them to come back out and just take me in their arms I’m happy I can finally breath. Just them staring is enough to take the air out of my lungs.

“They looked pissed,” Taehyung stresses. The younger wolf joins me on the ground, letting out an exhausted breath of his own. “You have some strong mates, and that’s only four of them.”

“Of course they are pissed,” Jin snaps as he also collapses. “Their mate is clinging to another wolf, jealousy with wolves is a scary thing. I’m surprised the tan one didn’t rip my head off.”

“How many are there?” Yoongi wonders, not taking his eyes off the house.

“I’m not sure, their numbers have never really been discussed since many don’t live to see them all but I know there is about six or seven,” Namjoon answers.

“Do you think all of them are my mates?”

Namjoon nods, “I believe so. They all seem to have the belief that they will have the same mate.”

“They probably smelled you on Jungkook like the youngest one,” Hoseok figures.

“Are you okay Hyung?” Tae checks on me, placing a warm hand on my back.

I sigh and run my fingers threw my hair, “I feel so tired. It has been awhile since I had so many powerful alphas around me, I’m not used to it anymore.”

“Well you better get used to it because there is no way in hell we are getting out of here with both you and Jungkook,” Hoseok gives me a sad smile.

“I know,” I return the smile briefly before suddenly tackling the male.

“Fuck,” The older boy curses as we roll in the snow, wrestling for dominace, “What are you doing?”

I can’t hold in my giggles as I’m able to get on top and pin him down, “I’m enjoying my last bit of freedom with you guys.” The others stare at our fight for a brief moment, letting my words sink in before sharing a look. Soon they are joining in on our fight.

“Dog pile on Insoo hyung!” Jimin declares. Suddenly I’m on bottom with six heavy wolves on top of me. There are laughs and curses as everyone is scrambling to be king of the pile. I push, punch, and kick my way through, doing my best to not seriously injure anyone, but in a fight like this, anything can happen. With lady luck on my side I’m able to concur my pack to reach the top.

“King of the hill!” I yell happily.

This is it. My last few hours of freedom before I have to commit to seven mates and leave my crazy world and past behind. I will no long be a alpha, or a hyung, or a boy. I will be a pretty little omega like I was always meant to be, like I always wanted to be when I was slaughtering villages. But now that I have the possibility in front of me, I don’t know if I want it.

Part 31 - Popped

Down the Voltage Rabbit Hole is an ongoing story about our MC, who could easily be anyone in voltage fandom. She woke up in hospital bed only to discover that she’d somehow been transported Voltage universe.

This story is ongoing, so if you missed a part, or are new to the story, please use the links below to catch yourself up:

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13 - Part 14 - Part 15 - Part 16 - Part 17 - Part 18 - Part 19 - Part 20 - Part 21 - Part 22 - Part 23 - Part 24 - Part 25 - Part 26 - Part 27 - Part 28 - Part 29 - Part 30

Part 31 - Popped

I showed up at Revance’s doorstep looking like something that had crawled out of the sewer. Without an umbrella, the rain had soaked to the bone, and my hair was plastered to my forehead while being simultaneously frizzy thanks to the residual humidity.

My eyes were still puffy and swollen, and it’s safe to say that I was still in a fragile emotional state as I rang their intercom.

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From Unluck to Something Better // request

Request: “Can you do where y/n and Justin are in Starbucks & Justin accidentally spills his drink on her (you can do the rest lol) but afterwards he wants to see her again and, & finds her doing a private dance class by herself and Justin got there with nick to rehearsal and ends up having her in his tour for a back up dancer 😭 and make it a sexual and long please”

WARNING: NONE, this imagine shouldn’t contain anything which could hurt you


Y/N’s POV:

I was sitting in the café and scrolling through my phone. I was waiting for my date which I should meet here. We should have met already 10 minutes ago but he wasn’t here yet.

Really good first impression, I thought myself and shook my head when there was still no one beside three other couple in other tables. Could I ever reach that point, I looked over them and sighed.

“You must be Y/N” I heard suddenly a voice next to me which made me turn my head. There was standing really handsome and tall man with blonde short hair. I nodded and stood up to shake hand with him.

“My name is Justin” he introduced himself and gave a big and warm smile. “Nice to meet you, Justin” I smiled back before we sat down. “I apologize that I was a little late. There was terrible weather outside” he said before the waiter came ask, what would we like to order.

We ordered cup of coffee and pieces of apple pie. After the waiter walked away with our orders, I looked out of the window. He was right. I haven’t noticed that it had started snowing.

“It’s okay” I said back finally to him. A short silence landed between us but thankfully he filled it quickly. “So would you like to tell something about yourself” he asked. “What things you like to do on your free time for example? What kind of man are you looking for?” he chuckled and to be honest, I could nothing but chuckle back. He seemed nice and humorous guy so far.

“I like do a lot of things..” I started and looked down on my feet. “Y/N, c'mon! Open about that ‘a lot of things’ little more” The way he said my name made my inside warm already even we had barely talked yet. His voice was just so calm and soft.

“Well, I like for example, music and hiking in nature” I told. He nodded. “We should go out hiking sometime.. I mean only if you want” he suggested. “That would be great” I smiled before the waiter came back with our coffee.

We thanked and Justin paid our bill like a gentleman do. He seemed to be a good guy. I would really like to meet him again. “What about you?” I asked and looked him. “You didn’t answer my other question” he winked.

I rolled my eyes back and took a sip of my coffee. “Polite, kind, humorous.. handsome” I named. “Do I fulfill any of those criteria?” he tilted his head and looked at me. “Maybe” I winked. “But now it’s your time to tell something about yourself”

“What do you wanna know?” he drank a little his coffee. “Everything” I leaned closer to him. “Everything?” he raised his eyebrows. “Well I like comment weird things under my friends posts in Instagram” he laughed. I just looked him back without feelings.

“Seriously..” I sighed. “You wanted know everything so..” he tried compain but knew that he couldn’t probably win. “You knew what I meant with that” He laughed softly and nodded. “Sorry, let’s be serious now…”

“I like hang out with my friends and just chill” he leaned back og his chair. “Your life sound so boring” I commented. “Oh no, it’s nothing but boring sweetie” he chuckled. “I’m almost all my time on the road. Sitting on the plane or in the bus, and going somewhere” he sighed.

“So are you some kind of musician then?” I raised my eyebrows impressed. He nodded. “Woah, sounds cool now I feel myself so pointless” I mumbled and looked away from him. I regretted that how I had just minute ago called his life boring when actually my own life was that compared to his.

“I know but it makes me really tired sometimes. You know, all those time zone changes and stuff. It takes time to get used to them but the problem is that you cannot get more time” he sighed again. “This is probably really tiring, right? Listen how I complain about my life” he chuckled

I shook my head. “It’s okay, my life isn’t that perfect either.” “What do you do for living then?” he asked and took a sip of his drink. “I’m a danc-” Suddenly, out of nowhere I found myself sitting there coffee all over my shirt. I looked it shocked and then my gaze raised on my coughing date. He looked a bit shocked too now.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” I yelled him and stood up. I was ready to leave. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry.. I didn’t mean to.. I..” he mumbled and tried stop me but I had done my choose.

I couldn’t stay around a guy like him, just no. I needed a polite man with good manners. Spilling a drink on your date’s shirt wasn’t contained to that file. He wasn’t what I was looking for.

So I walked out of the café and left him sit there all alone. He deserved that time to think about his doings. When I walked pass the window I could nothing but look quickly inside. There he was still sitting and covering his face with his hands.

Justin’s POV:

It had been already almost three weeks when I was out with that girl and I couldn’t get her out of my head, and especially how awful thing I did to her.

I wish that I’d have got her number before that thing happened, so I could have sent her my apologizes and maybe try redress my act somehow, but no. I had tried find it from number search but nothing.

I was in stuck before today Nick had mentioned that we should go practise my choreography. He had reserved one saloon to us in 2pm. And that was my ticket to closer to that girl.

You might wonder now, how but let me tell.

When we went wait in the dressing rooms of that saloon, I noticed a familiar jacket hanging on the hook. Just when my mind had started clear up and put pieces together, a small group of girls and a few boys walked in the dressing room. “Your turn, Ms. Y/L/N is waiting for you” one of them said and I looked Nick asking.

“I thought that there woukd be just me and you” I hissed to him and regretted my outfit choose which was a big basketball shorts and oversized top. “She sounded like a professional on the phone so I couldn’t say no when she offered a class with her” Nick said and tapped my shoulder. “It will be great, trust me”

We stepped in that small saloon and there she was standing, Y/N. She turned around and smiled but her smile disappered when she saw me.

She came to shake hands with us. “So you had some choreography to practise, right?” she asked when she shook hand with him. He nodded. “Cool, let me see” she said and Nick handed a small piece of paper to her.

She never shake hand with me which made me kind of sad. She didn’t even say hi. I was like a enemy to her but I was sure that she wouldn’t think that way after the class. This wasn’t bad idea at all, I thought. I should thank Nick later.

“Looks great, why don’t we start right away” she smiled to Nick and stepped closer to him. “No, not with me but him” Nick chuckled and nodded over me. I gave a light grin over her when she looked me disbelieved. She mumbled lowly ‘oh’ and walked closer to him.

“These clothes cost dollars so I wish you wouldn’t ruin these like you did last time” she hissed quietly to me before she nodded over Nick to put the music on. “I promise” I whispered. No Pressure started play in the background.

“This part starts with my moves and then there comes yours” she told and did the moves which my dancer should be doing. I could nothing to myself when my eyes landed on her ass even I tried look away. How bad I would have wanted to grab it.

“Your turn” she suddenly said. I quickly push my thoughts a side and started do my moves. “Looks good” she mumbled and kept nodding when she followed my dancing. “Next there comes those lifts” she told. I started get excited.

She stepped closer. “Have you practiced them before?” she asked and I nodded before I picked her up on my arms. “One, two, three and four.. down” she said and I did like she told. That was too short moment for me to be close to her. I craved more.

She did her moves again and I touched her thigh like the choreography told me do. I could feel how tensed she was even she tried hide it. “Another lift in three. One, two, three…” she told and I lifted her up.

“One, two, three.. and down, good” she said breathless and a light smile stayed on her lips maybe two seconds before she swipe it away. “Good job, Justin” she told and went take a sip of her drink. Nick turned of the player and looked the clock.

“I think that our time is up soon. Thank you so much Y/N for helping us” he thanked and shook hand with her. “My pleasure” she smiled. She looked me now too. “I wish you a luck to your tour, Justin” she said softly. “Thanks” I said back.

We were ready to leave and Nick had already went start the car but still that strange feeling kept me in that dressing room. I didn’t want this end like this. I thought about our date and then this day, there was no sign that everything would be fine between us.

I needed make a favour to her, and I knew exactly what it would be. I ran over Nick’s car and nodded him to roll his window open. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “Nothing, I just thought that have you found that one dancer to the tour yet?”

He shook his head but looked me still asking. “Could you wait 10 minutes, okay? I’ll be right back” I told to him and ran back inside a big smile on my face. “Y/N!” I yelled to the door. “Y/N, are you here?” Soon I heard footsteps coming closer to the dressing rooms.

“What’s wrong? Did you forget something?” she asked. “No, I would have a question to you” I said. “If you’re asking me out again, I’ll slap you” she warned but sat still next to me on the bench. “No, I won’t” I chuckled. “I’ll actually offer you a work and fame” I continued.

“What do you mean?” she asked. “There would be a one place left in my dancer group and I’d really live to take you there because you’re so talented and everything” I praised her and made her blush. “You must be kidding, right?” she mumbled but I shook my head.

“No, it would be same time kind of apologize from me to that little accident, which happened in that little café” I said and made her giggle. “Deal, when are you leaving on the road?” she shook hand with me and my heart took an extra beat because of that. I would have wanted to kiss her but I decided contain those feelings.

“On next week” I told. “I will tell to Nick to call you on Friday, okay? Dancers’ practises are on Saturday and Sunday” I said and she nodded. “Great, see you then” she smiled. SMILED. She smiled to ME. I smiled back and waved to her byes before I left the building.

“Problem missing dancer solved” I told proudly to Nick when I stepped in the car. “Y/N is coming with us” Nick looked me a bit suprised but didn’t said anything back.

I couldn’t wait next months when I will able to spend time with Y/N. Maybe it would lead to something later, at least I hoped so, but now it was maybe too early to think about that. I had to live in the moment not in the past or in the future.

I was happy that my unluck had turned to luck.

Lacrosse Shirt-Isaac Lahey

Teen Wolf Imagine:#90


Word Count: 1,720

Warnings: Insecurities, comparing self and relationship to others, mentions of repercussions from abuse (just in passing in one sentence) 

A/n:So for Christmas I got a shirt that says Beacon Hills Lacrosse on the Front and Lahey 14 on the back and I was wearing it and putting things away and a piece of dialogue came to mind and this is what become of that! I hope you enjoy it. Also Overweight/Plus Size!Reader!


This is the last imagine for 2016! So I just wanted to say, despite all the shit he put us through, here’s to 2016. We survived! We all my be a little worse for wear but we did it and that’s something to be thankful for. May 2017 be less of everything this year was. I thought of some pretty creative names to call this year but I didn’t think any of them were appropriate enough for an author’s note

Originally posted by teenwolf--imagines


Coming Soon

Last Imagine

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Mind Games pt.6

Requested by me: You thought your life was cut short but two pretty little clowns come to your rescue

Pairing: The Joker x Reader x Harley (poly)

A/N - Its that rare time of the month where I actually post something instead of hiding behind the draft option on Wattpad. This is super short compared to the other parts but I wanted to get something out there. The entire thing is trash. As always I appreciate feedback 💕

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ - Drowning and sexual references. Tis all

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5

The was a distant light that was oddly blinding. My body felt light but as my lungs filled with oxygen I suddenly felt myself again. The light was closer now and I blinked myself back into reality. J looked down on me, his arms wrapped firmly around my smaller frame. There was a weird ringing in my ear and my head hurt like hell. As did my lungs; They were burning. It was more intense than the burning on my skin. I stared at J, his blue eyes entrancing. I was alive? He connected our lips, they felt slimy amongst the liquid but I still reached up to pull him closer in an attempt to intensify the kiss. The man pulled back.

“You really are useless.” I hurt too much to speak but he laughed. A loud, long, signature laugh. I looked away. Noticing Harley. Why were they here? I squirmed as best I could to remove myself from his grip. Wincing as I attempted to ignoring the pain. But as he finally let go, I realised I couldn’t support my weight. I went under. The liquid once again cutting of my airways. How come those two could stay afloat? Harley came to my rescue this time. I coughed as I was pulled back to the surface. My body trying to take in as much oxygen as possible.

“Thanks.” I uttered softly and Harley smiled. She pulled me to the edge, I assume so I could support myself. I placed an arm over the side of the metal vat, looking over at the Joker. He didn’t seem amused.

“Still can’t do anything by yourself, heck I had to jump in here to stop you from dying.”

“I…I didn’t,” my head shook, as I tried to catch my breath. My voice croaking. “Ask for that.”

“So you would have preferred to drown then? go ahead. I don’t care.”

I sighed. “If you didn’t care, why did you jump in after me?”

The Joker didn’t respond, instead he made his way to the metal stairs and climbed out.

“Don’t die on me now Y/N.” Harley commented. Following after Joker. I remained in the chemicals. The burning had mostly stopped, at least on the outside. I slowly pulled myself around the edge. Thinking about all that had just happened. I blacked out, probably from the lack of oxygen. I didn’t think he’d save me though and I’m not sure I actually wanted him to. Everything would have been easier if I had been left to drown. It was hurting my head to think. Made me wonder if this was why the others acted before thinking or was this pain temporary? I climbed out. Looking over my now - wait- I was naked? The chemicals burnt my clothes, leaving threads of fabric draped over my limbs. I glanced at Harley and the Joker. I was blushing slightly; I don’t know why. It wasn’t like I hadn’t seen them naked before.

“Probably should have told you to bring a change of clothes, sorry Puddin. You look good though.”

Harley smirked, she’d somehow remembered her own change of clothes. I watched them both get ready. Taking in each and every tattoo that decorated their perfectly pale skin. Now fully clothed, the man walked over to me. He had a shirt in his hand. I shivered in the cold, hoping he was going to be nice and give me the item. Instead, he tossed it to Harley. I watched it go, frowning. He circled me, his eyes descending over my bare skin. It was more intimidating than anything.

“Good is an understatement. I’d say…exquisite.” He inched closer, his hands sliding down to my hips and slipping around to my ass. He gently squeezed, pulling me as close as possible. I placed my hands on his pecks. Harley pressed up against me from behind. Her hands making their way to my stomach, I helped by pushing away from J. The shirt hung between us. This all felt slimy and weird, I was still dripping from the chemicals.

“I want to play too.” She whispered, planting a kiss just below my ear. I let my head fall back to the girl’s shoulders. J kissed my neck, rather intensely. He nipped the skin softly and for a moment I got lost in it. I let out a lustful sigh. It had been a while since I hadn’t felt like just a good fuck to him. And he seemed so soft and gentle. I didn’t want it to end if I was being honest.

“Lets see if we can make this kitty purr.” The electricity that now coursed through my veins at just their touch, made it seem like my body was betraying me. I wanted this but I wasn’t letting him off so easily. It took a lot for me to make them stop. I pushed J away from me.

“Don’t touch me.” I whispered and J just chuckled. Harley, however, remained firmly attached. And that I didn’t have an issue with. I did however yank the shirt from her grip. I quickly put it on.

“What’s got into you?” The Joker asked with a smirk. It was a knowing smirk, like he had expected this all along.

“You threw me in there.”

“It’s what you wanted.” He shrugged.

“I said No, J. I’m starting to think you don’t know the meaning of that word.”

“Trust me, I know the meaning. There are just….times I find best to ignore it. You think I would have gotten this far in life if I listened when people told me no. Batman tells me no all the time.” He seemed to find the whole situation amusing. But I should have expected that. He was known for his sick sense of humour. Not that I’d necessarily say that was a bad thing. My issue was that there is a time and a place for it.

“Well I’m not just anyone, am I?” I was angry and not just about this. It was about everything. I guess the anger had built up with every shitty thing he did. Harley’s grip tightened around me. As if trying to comfort me, she placed her head against my back.

“You’re no different than Harley here or anyone for that matter. What makes you think you’re better than any other bright eyed girl who walks along the street every single day, huh? What makes you so special?”

“I-” I started but I was somewhat unsure of how to answer. “Nothing, makes me special. I guess I’m just like every other stupid girl who falls for your lies. What makes me different though is that you’re supposed to like me. You’re supposed to want to be with me the way I do with you but you don’t. I’m just trying to make you happy, J. Everything I do seems to be for you and I don’t -” I stopped when I felt tears start to descend down my cheeks. Crying in front of him was probably the worst thing I could have done. He kept his eyes on me. His smile yet to fade. Reaching up, his thumb swiped across my skin to stop the tears.

“Dry those tears, my precious porcelain doll.” I went to slap his hand away but instead found myself placing my hand against his on my cheek. “It’s a shame to see you so sad.”

“Don’t do that!” I tightened my grip, dragging his hand away. I wasn’t going to fall for this again.

“Vicious little kitty.” He chuckled. “Harley let go of her.”

His voice was firm and she simply did as instructed. Then proceeded to walk over to stand beside J. Her eyes seemed sad and I wondered if it was because of me. I stared at her until her head dropped.

“You see Y/N, I know you’re not stupid enough to pick a fight with me after I just saved your life.”

“Just because you saved my life doesn’t give you the right to treat me this way. You’re the one who nearly killed me in the first place. I still don’t understand why you saved me.” I argued.

“You’re right it doesn’t give me the right. What does, is all the times you swore by my side. You didn’t forget did you? The things I’ve made you do. You back out now and god only knows what would happen? Will my little princess risk it all?” He seemed so self assured. Probably because he’s right for the most part. “Keep in mind…I own you and I’m free to play with my toys however I want” The Joker planted a kiss on my forehead. I just smiled. A bright, perfectly fake smile. As he pulled. back he returned it but his seemed more devilish in comparison. He held his hand out before me. I frowned but took it anyway. Seemed uncharacteristically nice. Then again so was him saving me. I still didn’t understand why? What made him jump in? He led me out, I held my free hand out for Harley but she shook her head. She didn’t even smile. Just followed slowly behind. Her head down. I kept my Y/E/C eyes on her waiting for her to suddenly perk up or cartwheel out. It didn’t happen. Something was definitely off, I just didn’t know what? And I wasn’t sure I wanted to

anonymous asked:

I love love love your Caryl prompts! Please do #5 maybe post canon? Like after the season 8 premiere!? ;) and #15 when Daryl and Carol are discussing his big lie?!? Please oh please!! You're so great!

So, after ages of waiting - my Google Docs says this has been in the works since April 25 -, here’s your second prompt. I’m so sorry it took so long, but as everyone I’ve talked to about this will confirm to you, this was incredibly hard to write. I really hope you will enjoy it - and thank you so much again for your kind words! ❤️

Tell me why

She had seen him picking his way out from among the graves the war against the Saviors had left them with, and waited until he hit the street, his eyes still downcast, his long hair hiding his face. He was dragging his feet, his shoulders were slumping, and he never raised his head until he nearly ran into her, but saw her booted feet in front of him just in time.

They were all exhausted and running on fumes, and it showed. Bruises, bandages, dark shadows under sunken, bloodshot eyes, were everywhere, no exceptions. They were all shuffling about like walkers themselves, with the latest battle only two days in the past. What they would all have needed, Carol thought, was a two month vacation in the world as it had been before the Turn.

Then again, she corrected herself, remembering Ed and Merle, maybe not.

His weary eyes flickered over her and then away again in an instant as he saw the same signs of exhaustion on her that he himself was showing. He was slow to react meaningfully to seeing her, and when he did, it was just to look away some more and mumble, “Sorry you had ta be here for this. Never meant for -” He vaguely waved a hand back in the direction of the graves and winced as if in pain, and when she wondered about this, she remembered that he’d been shot in the shoulder the day she had left Alexandria to get away from it all - not that he himself had ever told her.

Not that he himself had told her anything about what had happened to this place, to the people living in it, since she had left Alexandria that night, before sunrise, leaving only a letter to explain why she was going.

A virtual stranger, if a well-meaning one, had had to tell her about all of this.

Her eyes wandered over the many graves that had sprung up here since they had arrived. Maybe, she mused, these graves would be here anyway, even if they had never seen Alexandria, if Aaron and Eric had decided they were too feral a group to bring in.

And maybe they wouldn’t.

Maybe, if those two had sneaked away again after observing them for a few days, the Monroe family would still be alive. Or Denise. Or Jessie and her children and husband. As always when she thought of these things, in moments when she felt emotionally stable enough to do so, she braced herself for the pain of Sam, and as always it still hit her like a knife to her heart, twisting and cutting through her as if eviscerating her, leaving her gutted.

She thought back to Glenn’s grave in Hilltop, to the pocket watch that Maggie was carrying now, her family’s legacy, her heirloom, handed down through generations.

In her mind’s eye, she saw Daryl sitting at her table in that small house not far from the Kingdom, saying, “Everyone’s alright,” after hesitating just a little too long, and ducking his head just a little too much so she hadn’t been able to see his eyes - and with the light of the fire the only light in the room, it was doubtful if she would seen confirmation there, even though she had been certain even then.

Certain that he was lying to her.

She’d had a vague, nagging suspicion, she’d been certain there was something he was leaving out - but not until she’d talked to Morgan had she known that he hadn’t just omitted something but outright been lying to her by telling her that everyone was okay and they had reached a peaceful agreement with the sociopath subjugating all the communities within reach.

He had lied about Abe, about Glenn, and about himself.

About a good friend and a member of their family getting beaten to death, about Maggie being turned into a widow within seconds of Daryl jumping up and attacking Negan to protect Rosite. Had not told her about getting taken, locked up, and probably hurt while he’d been with the Saviors, on top of receiving a gunshot wound to his shoulder so Dwight could take him and Rosita without facing resistance.


Her voice was soft, free of any hint of accusation, yet he blushed - and understood immediately what she was referring to, even though neither of them had addressed his visit to her lonely house on the edges of the Kingdom.

“You wanna do this now?”

The sorrow in his voice almost broke her, but she nodded. In order to be able to move on, she needed all loose ends dealt with, and Daryl lying to her about anything, let alone something so huge, was definitely a loose end, and one she could no longer ignore, with the life or death issues handled for now.

Very slowly, Daryl started walking, moving past her without touching her. She saw his jaw muscles clenching. Although he remained silent and never even looked at her, she took his cue and followed him, matching his pace. When they reached one of the elevated guard platforms, he climbed the ladder, slowly, as if carrying a huge weight, and then slumped over the wall looking out, waiting until she joined him.

“You weren’t ready, back then.”

His voice sounded rough and exhausted. He still wasn’t looking at her. Now, instead of gnawing on his lip or the inside of his cheek, he was worrying the skin around his fingernails. His left thumb already had an angry red groove running parallel to his nail, filling with blood. He absentmindedly flicked the bit of skin he’d just ripped off over the wall and started in on the next finger.

Carol thought of taking his hand so he’d stop, but thought better of it. While he was this agitated, he never took touch well. Instead, she stood next to him and they both watched the tendrils of morning mist still hanging over the meadow outside burning away as the sun rose over the horizon. When the air started getting warmer, Carol slipped out of her padded jacket and hung it from one of the guard platform’s support posts. She didn’t speak - she knew that he would need time for this, with or without prompting.

When the sun was fully out, a perfect orange ball behind the screen of fog shrouding it, he cleared his throat.

“Said you’d had to leave Alexandria. ‘n’ before that, you were so … distant. After those assholes took you ‘n’ Maggie was the first time you admitted you were not okay, ‘n’ then you left.” Again, he struggled with the idea of her leaving Alexandria, her family, him, and it took him a while until he managed to go on. “And when you opened that door, after bein’ gone for, what, little more than a week?” He glanced her way, and in his eyes, she saw the weight of yet another failure he was shouldering. “You looked … I dunno … rested? More … relaxed?”

Heaving in a breath, he looked out over the meadow once more. It was hard to imagine that, not so long before, it had been teeming with walkers and, more recently, with live enemies consciously trying to kill all of them. She dragged her mind away from those memories - she still didn’t feel solid enough in her mind yet to process them. Daryl, she noted, had been silent while she had been musing quietly, and started speaking again only when he knew she was fully present again.

“You needed the rest, you needed … time off from bein’ responsible for everyone, so … I wanted you to have more of that. And if I had told you the truth -”

His voice broke, and she was shocked to see a tear dripping directly from his eyes onto his left hand, resting on the handhold of their platform.

“If I had told you what happened -”

He was unable to continue for at least a minute as he fought for control.

She knew, from everyone who had been there, that it had been Daryl’s reaction to Negan’s actions that had prompted Glenn’s death, and Daryl, being who he was, was putting all the blame on himself, of course. Patiently, Carol waited for Daryl to calm down and continue, and finally, he did.

“You’d said you’d lose yourself if you had to kill again, and … You’re too important, I just …”

He sounded as if he was admitting defeat. He’d been holding his breath and exhaled in a rush following this confession, giving her a pleading look.

“I don’t care, you’re worth more to me than anyone else, and I just couldn’t risk you. Anyone else, yes. Myself, yes. But you?”

He shook his head, and his eyes told her that he wasn’t sorry for lying. He was sorry for stating so blatantly that other lives, including his own, were worth so much less to him, compared to hers, but not for feeling that way, and acting accordingly.

Protecting her.

At the expense of lying to her, for the very first time ever, and risking lives as a result. Daryl, who never lied to anyone, and would rather die than not defend and protect people who needed his help.

Closing her eyes, she felt tears pricking her eyelids, and a hot pain in her chest. I couldn’t risk you. Anyone else, yes. Myself, yes. But you? His words hit home as the magnitude of their meaning kept unfolding. Nobody had ever felt this way about her, had made her his absolute priority like this, and she felt humbled and elated all at once.

She wanted to argue, to list the names of the other members of their family, the people who had been fighting for survival by their side for almost three years now - but the words died on her lips when she saw his eyes, filled with guilt and love. He knew what he was saying, and he was still saying it. Anyone else, yes. But you?

Overwhelmed by his love for her and her own fierce love for him, she did reach for his hand now, resting her own on top of his, and his thumb came up to gently rub her pinkie once, twice, before he raised his arm, still holding her hand, and carefully turned her sideways while he himself also turned to face her.

“C’m here,” he mumbled, and the world around them disappeared as they leaned into each other, two weary warriors finding strength and love in each other.


#Caryl fan fiction

#Daryl Dixon

#Carol Peletier

#LD writes fan fiction


I’m making a list of songs that are perfect for Nygmobblepot and
if I had money to purchase editing software I would make into a video;
[perfect with the whole Isabella compared to the girl that stole the boy she liked thing aka Oswald being the one singing basically
just look at the lyrics its actually perfect
again look at the lyrics
[ wanna start letting you know this
Because of you my life has a purpose
You helped me be who I am today
I see myself in every word you say
Sometimes it feels like nobody gets me
Trapped in a world where everyone hates me
There’s so much that I’m going through
I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you}

enough said

“Kiss Me” Benny The Jet Imagine

Request: “ Can I request a Benny Rodriguez (the sandlot) imagine where you’re dating Benny and Smalls is your little sister and all the other guys think you’re really hot and they tease Benny when they see a hickey on your neck? Thanks love!!”

Word Count: 942

Warnings: None

A/N: I changed it up a bit. I hope you still like it!

The yelling of baseball terms filled my ears as I entered the sandlot to grab my brother, Scotty “Smalls”. He neglected to do some of his chores before leaving to go play baseball with all these dweebs. I scan the field until I spot my brother, my twin brother. He may be older than me by a minute and twelve seconds, but I’m a lot more mature and responsible compared to him. My eyes locked on my brother.

“SCOTTY!” I yelled at the top of my lungs

Everyone jumped and looked towards me, they stared like they’ve never seen a girl before. I’ve never been here when people were actually playing, and I’ve never met these kids before. They huddled together while I just stared at them and crossed my arms against my chest. They kept looking up at me, it was kind of creeping me out.


My brothers starts to jog toward me and I start heading towards home again.

“Why is mom mad at me?” He questioned as he tilted his head

“You forgot to put the dishes away, put the towels back, and grab your laundry.” 

We got to the house and Scotty wanted to say something but then continued to avoid the subject.

I was in bed in my pajamas reading a magazine when I heard a knock on my door.

“Who is it?”


“Come in.” I said as I sat up and put the magazine down.

He closed my door and pulled up a chair next to my bed.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“This is gonna be weird…” He said as he started trailing off.

“Just spit it out.”

“Me and the boys were talking.. actually, they were just asking me about you…’


“They think you’re hot…and they want you to come to the sandlot tomorrow…” He said as he started to rub the back of his neck.”

“Yeah….. I’ll come. But this was a very weird way of asking me.” I chuckled.

He left my room and I turned off my lamp and fell asleep.

*The next day*

We ate breakfast, did our chores, then headed to the sandlot. We talked about how all his friends thought I was hot.

“Did you explain that we’re twins?” I said as a chuckle escaped my lips.

“Nope, you called me over before I could even mention it.”

We laughed about this whole ordeal all the way to the sandlot. Everyone was already huddled up. Scotty made his way to his friends and I made my way to the sidelines. I watched their game as each of them tried their hardest to flirt and impress me.

Minutes and then hours went by. Eventually the baseball game came to an end and we all made our way to the best pizzeria in town.

They were all flirting with me the entire way there, except Benny. Come to think of it, he hasn’t said a word to me all day.

We ordered our pizza and the one vital question popped up.

“So, Y/N. How much older than Smalls are you?” Ham asked.

Scotty and I looked at each other and gulped.

“Actually…” I cleared my throat. “He’s older than me… by one minute and twelve seconds… Scotty and I are twins…”

Everyone’s jaws dropped, except Benny’s, he just clenched his jaw. Scotty and I shot each other a look that was worth more than a thousand words.

No one knew how to react. Everyone was confused.

Squints was the first one to break the silence.

“So, Y/N, how is hot babe like you the younger twin of a dweeb like that?”

This set off a whole conversation of being a twin that my brother and I were not expecting.

We ate delicious pizza and discussed love life, twin life, and summer plans.

The sun was just about to kiss the horizon and we all decided to go home. Benny and I stayed behind to clean up our stall a tad bit.

“You didn’t talk much, if at all today.” I said as we left the shop.

Still, nothing.

We made our way onto the stone bridge separating our part of town from main street.

I leaned against the rail of the bridge.

“What do I need to do get you to talk?’

“Kiss me.” He finally said.


“Kiss me.”

I leaned in and our lips touched. My heart fluttered with content. New sensations danced around my body.

Benny’s lips trailed to my neck, eventually finding my sweet spot. 

After what seemed like hours, we talked about our life as we walked to our houses. He liked me and I liked him.

I went to bed one happy girl that night.

*Next day*

I woke up at noon. panicking until I remembered that my parents went on a lunch date and Scotty and his friends went to the pool.

I’m not much of a swimmer so I ate lunch and walked all the way down to the town pool.

I enter through the dressing room and I look at the mirror and see three hickies on my neck.

“Well damn…” I thought to myself.

I make my way to my brother and his friends and before I could even announce my presence, Squints made an announcement.

“Damn Y/N who sucked your neck?”

Both Benny and I blushed heavily and the boys started hollering and teasing us for what seemed like hours.

Man, this was going to be a long summer.

Requests are still open!


Who and What I can write

Want a ship? Click here to see what you need to do!


Originally posted by sam-and-dean-winchesters

Characters: Dean x Reader

Word Count: 2315

Summary: Dean finds the reader with the Supernatural books.

Warnings: Smut, Slight Angst, Some Fluff, Unprotected Sex, Slight Pain!kink, Angry!Dean, Swearing

A/N: This is the last installment for this series, Jealousy/Acceptance.  Hope it isn’t too strange or preachy.  Thank you so much for all the awesome feed back I received from Jealousy.  I’m really blown away.  Special thanks to @notnaturalanahi and @justanotherwaywarddaughter, for helping me get over my writers block for this story.


You took another sip of coffee and turned the page.

The boys were out. They’d finished a hunt and were on their way home.  Presumably you had a few more hours to yourself.  You were content with waiting, curled up on the bed in Dean’s room.

Dean had been almost resistant to leaving you.  Since the night you’d first slept together, he’d hardly let you out of his sight, even in the bunker.  Not that he’d discuss why with you.

You smiled distractedly, turning another page.  It was Dean and you knew his aversions to vocalizing his feelings.  He opted for a more physical approach.  

You shivered.  Not that you minded.

He hadn’t sad it in so many words, or put voice to the relationship between you two, but he held you tightly each night in his sleep and filled you in way that left your body pleasantly aching from being loved too hard.

You squeezed your muscles tightly, trying to recapture the faded echo of Dean’s touch, dimmed somewhat from the days he’d been gone.

Keep reading

Am I the only one upset at Gragas’ in-game model? He looks so bad compared to his splash art —especially Gragas Esquire! He looks like a sodden, disgusting mess in game, and it pisses me off so much, especially since I’m an overweight guy myself. I was so impressed with how he looked when I saw the splash that I bought the skin and went to play him, and all of a sudden he’s a messy, unkempt slob in a badly fitted suit, and I instantly started feeling bad about my weight again. Not cool, Riot, not cool.

Broken Home - M.C.

I feel like I always give Mikey the most dramatic imagines…probably going to do a part two of this, just not today because I’m on my way to baby sit 3 diablos.


Michael woke up to his phone ringing loudly answering it without hesitation. “Y/n…it’s,” he started before looking towards his alarm clock “3am baby girl. You have class in five hours. Why are you still-”

“Mikey…can you come pick me up please?” She whispered into the phone. Michael sat up running a hand through his hair before running it down his face in an attempt to wake up.

“Why are you whispering?”

“Please…can you just-” she started before being cut off by the sound of glass in the background followed by a female yelling loudly.

“Baby, what’s going on?”

“They’re fighting again,” she whispered once again. He breathed heavily climbing out of the bed before reaching for a pair of jeans by his bed.

“I’ll be there in five.”

Michael sat backstage of the venue in New York thinking of the girl he left behind only two years ago, not that it was his choice.

“We’re going on in thirty…you ready?” Calum asked sitting next to his friend noting his strained face.

“How do you think she is, Cal?”

“Who….? Y/n? I don’t know Mike….can’t you just text her?” He shook his head remembering the night she walked out on him. The last night they ever talked, right before they left for their first tour.

Michael let his lips trail up the skin on her neck as he slowly eased his way into her. He wanted to show her how much he loved her, and it was the only way he knew how without verbally saying it and having her shut him down. His thrusts were slow and deep causing a shiver to run down her spine as he pinned her hands above her head kissing her with as much passion as he could. Within seconds he was pushed to the side to see her scrambling to her feet, fear in her eyes.

“Wh-what the fuck was that?” She asked stuttering crossing her arms over her chest refusing to make eye contact with him.

“I was making lo-”

“Don’t. Don’t say that, Michael,” she pleaded finally looking at him, her eyes watering. “You can’t love me, Mikey.”

“And why the hell not?” He asked now flustered himself, his face a deep red in embarrassment.

“Because I can’t love you the same way…I can’t do it.” She started putting her clothes on, her body shaking.

“Y/n, look at me.” She did as he was told seeing pain in his eyes. “Do you love me?”

“Mikey, sto-.”

“Do. You. Love. Me?” He asked not accepting her blowing off the question. “

Yes…and that’s why I need to leave, Michael…I can’t hurt you more than I am right now.” By time she finished that statement, she was completely dressed, leaving before Michael could catch up considering he was fully nude. By the next morning, her phone had been disconnected. He didn’t bother going to her parent’s house knowing she wouldn’t be there. She hadn’t lived there in over a year. He attempted calling a few of her friends, but none of them had seen her longer than him.

He hadn’t explained the entire situation to Calum when it happened. He knew her just as well as Michael had, even helping Michael write the song Broken Home about the female. All Calum knew was that one minute, Michael was fine and next, he was a heartbroken mess.

“I think she’s doing alright, Mike…she has to be. It’s y/n. She’s always been strong.” Michael nodded his head agreeing with his friend sighing as time passed by slowly. But for whatever reason, he just couldn’t help the feeling in the pit of his stomach. “Come on. Let’s go get ready.” Just as the two stood up, Michael got a call from an unknown number, answering it despite the looks he was getting from Calum.


“Is this Michael Clifford?” A male voice asked on the other line.

“Can I ask who’s calling?”

“This is Dr. Jones, from Massachusetts General hospital…you were placed in y/n’s phone as an emergency contact.” Michael stood there confused and in disbelief before worry soon washed through his body. “She’s here in the ICU under psychiatric watch. She overdosed. Is there anyway you can come in? We aren’t really sure who else to call. She doesn’t seem to have any family members listed.”

“I can be on the next plane in the morning and be there in the afternoon,” he said earning a confused look from Calum.

“Alright. Thank you.”

Michael hung up the phone looking at Calum laughing dryly. “I found her. She’s in Mass General overdosed.”


Y/n woke up to the sound of hushed whispers and a bright light in her face. She knew from the way her head was pounding and how dry her mouth felt that she wasn’t where she wanted to be. And when she finally opened her eyes spotting bright green puff of hair, she really knew this was the last place she wanted to be.

“I thought you would’ve woken up before I got here,” she heard knowing he was speaking to her, refusing to look up and meet the bright emerald eyes of Michael Gordon Clifford. “They called me because I was the only one in your phone listed as an emergency contact.” She started picking at her nail beds as tears stung her eyes. “At least have the decency to look me in the eyes after two years, y/n.” She looked up slowly regretting it almost immediately seeing how tired and distraught he looked. “You know, the doctor called me right before my show last night. I was so confused when he said I was an emergency contact considering you walked out on me. And, here we are, two years later. I at least thought the next time we’d be seeing each other i’d be taking you out for a cup of coffee. Not trying to get you out of the psych ward of a hospital.” Tears silently left her eyes as she looked down again. “I’m not even mad at you like I feel I should be. I’m scared as hell actually. I cried almost the entire plane ride this morning because it was such a high possibility you wouldn’t even wake up…fuck,” he swore going to hit the wall, stopping himself quickly. “I shouldn’t be here.”

“I’m sorry,” she let the raspy words leave her mouth. Her throat was dry and the sound of her voice wasn’t close to how it usually sounded.

“How long were you on the dope?” He asked handing her his water bottle she she quickly downed in seconds.

“Yesterday was the only time I did it,” she muttered remembering the guy that tied the band on her forearm before helping her to inject the poison in her body. It seemed like a good idea at the time. It was silent again in the small hospital room aside from the constant beeping coming from heart monitors and the fact her blood pressure was taken every five minutes. “How’s the band?”

“Fine,” he said giving her a one word answer. She nodded looking towards the far wall knowing all too well it was more than fine. They were in the middle of their second tour, they were playing Boston in two days…she even had tickets to see them, not that she would tell Michael that. She kept tabs on him, loving how he was thriving and becoming his own person. School had never been his thing.

“I like your music…Sounds Good, Feels Good is a great album..” He looked at her confused cocking his head to the side. “I bought it when it came out. I have the first one too.”

“We weren’t your parents,” he whispered ignoring her statement about his music. “I thought I was doing enough to show you that when we were together…”

“I told you already that none of this was you, Mikey…it’s all me…I just, I don’t believe in love. I don’t believe in marriage…I don’t see the point of it. Giving yourself to someone…your entire being, your trust, only to have them step on it? My father cheated on my mom for seven years. He refused to let her divorce him. He financially threw us down the drain to go out every weekend, and for what? To come home drunk screaming at my mom? Telling her that it’s her fault he had to cheat because she wouldn’t put out? Her fault they didn’t have money to pay bills…no thank you. I want no part in that,” she said, tears starting to fall again, not as quiet.

“I’m not your god damned father, y/n!” This time his hand connected with the wall, his face red and eyes clouded over. “For fuck’s sake, when have I ever acted like him? I’ve never put my hands on you or blamed you for anything. Not even when you left me. The entire time, I asked myself what more I could do…you can’t compare everything to your family. You can’t keep living in the past!” He stuck his hands in his pockets looking away from her. “Love can be beautiful…it can be such a beautiful thing…I want to be able to show you that, if you’ll let me try again.” She looked at him in disbelief as he finally looked back to her, his bottom lip covered with teeth as his nerves set in.

“Why would you want to do that…after everything…after all of this, you still want me..?” She asked as he sat in the chair next to her bed. The door opened slowly revealing three worried band members as they poked their heads through the door. She only knew Calum and Luke, having gone to school with them. Ashton was a figure she hadn’t gotten the chance to meet yet. “I’m not taking you away from your band, Michael.”

“You won’t be,” he whispered back to her gripping her hand noting she hadn’t looked back to him yet. “Just sleep on it…alright? I’m going to grab something to eat.” He stood up from the chair leaving the room with the other boys as she looked down at her lap once again, only to be startled by the door opening again revealing Calum Hood.

“Can we talk?”

“I guess so,” she muttered watching him shut the door quietly behind him. “If Michael put you up to th-”

“He thinks I’m in the bathroom…listen, y/n…I understand completely why you did what you did…but he hasn’t been the same Michael since you left and, quite frankly, I don’t think you were quite fair with how you left. Falling in love can be scary when you don’t even know how love works, but let him at least teach you how it’s done.” He made his way back to the door opening it slightly. “He’s scared too if that helps in any way.” He left her alone as she sat and thought about everything her and Michael had been through. They grew up as close friends in school, soon relying on him when she needed an outlet at 10 when the fighting with her parents began. Their first kiss was an accident, but in the moment she knew she wanted him to be her only kisses…it was Michael, after all…it was her Michael.

New Hotch Fanfic! Enjoy, lovelies! Reblog, love, share, comment. Whatever! I’m on Wattpad! dreamer9511❤️

And, this picture, again, because he’s hot. *Intimidation*

Reid and Emily had been taken hostage by a cult that they had gone to investigate after receiving a call from a fifteen year old girl about an older man having inappropriate relations with underage girls. We had set up a tent right outside of the gates, far enough out that we wouldn’t get hurt. This was getting out of hand, and we were losing leverage against them. They had already found out that one of them was an FBI agent, and Emily took the heat of it by telling them it was just her. They were in the middle of beating her for lying to them when Derek threw his headphones down and walked off.

I went to catch up with him. “Hey, she’s strong. She’ll get through this, okay?” I put my hand on his arm, and he jerked away. “How can you tell me that she’s gonna be okay, huh? How do you know that!” His response made me take a step back. I knew he was worried, but it still made tears prick at my eyes. I quickly blinked them away and turned my head from him. “Baby girl….I’m sorry…” he said, coming over and wrapping me in a hug. “It’s fine, Derek…really,” I told him, burying my head in his shoulder. I was glad to have him around, he was like an older, very protective, brother. “Derek. You’re squishing me,” I said, pulling back. He chuckled and let go of me. I turned to look at him, “We’ll get them back. We’ll get through this, okay?” He smiled and walked back to Hotch and Rossi.

Just then, the state Attorney General pulled up and I inwardly sighed. This can’t be good. He stalked over to where I was standing. “What in the hell is going on here?” He demanded, practically yelling in my face. “We received a call, and we’re taking care of it,” I said, calmly. I hated this kind of confrontation, it just about brought on an anxiety attack. Thankfully, I had never actually had one, but I had been on the verge a few times. “I can see that.” He yelled, walking over to where the equipment was set up. If he decided to mess with anything or make any rash decisions, we’d all be in for mess. “Sir, you can’t go over there, this is a federal investigation, and I’m under strict orders from my unit chief,” I said, practically bounding after him. “I don’t give a damn about your orders, little girl. Who the hell do you think you are?” He growled, backing me relentlessly into the corner of the tent. “I’m the Attorney General of this state, and I demand to know why I wasn’t told the FBI was bringing undercover agents into my jurisdiction!”

I really wanted to slap the dude now, but I probably looked like I was about to cry. See, one thing I hated about myself was that when I got really pissed off, I cried. Don’t ask me why. Now, I was silently praying that the tears that were threatening to surface would hold off for a while longer. Not only was I below this man in position, but I was also a woman. I continuously had to prove myself in situations like this. I also despise getting yelled at. I don’t care if you are angry with me, if you are pointing out my faults, reprimanding me, whatever, just do not yell at me. I heard a voice come from behind the General. “The only thing that you’re in a position to command is a lawyer.” I averted my eyes from the General to see Hotch coming to my rescue. “Who the hell are you?” the General questioned.

Oh dear Lord, here we go. He just questioned Hotch. “I’m Aaron Hotchner, Unit Chief. I’m the guy who’s gonna tell the Attorney General of the United States whether to charge you with obstructing a federal investigation or negligent homicide.” Oh. Well, then. He wasn’t even talking to me, and I felt my knees go weak, for more reasons than one. “And,” Hotch continued, “don’t you ever talk to my agent like that again, much less a lady. She is one of the best agents we have, and you are in no position to talk to her like that, do I make myself clear?” My heart melted. He had come to my rescue. “You can’t talk to me like that,” he countered. This guy just wasn’t getting the picture. Clearly, he had no idea who he was dealing with. Hotch got in his face, staring him down. “Get off my crime scene,” Hotch growled.

The scene that played out in front of me was nothing compared to the look Hotch was giving this guy. I almost felt bad for him, but, then again, he did yell at me, and called me ‘little girl’. The guy backed down after figuring out that Hotch wasn’t going to. He went and got into his car and drove off. Hotch came over to me, where I was still planted firmly into the ground. “Are you okay?” Hotch asked, putting his hand on my upper arm. I was zoned out, but broke from my reverie at his touch. “Yeah…I’m fine, Hotch.” My voice waivered, telling him otherwise. He raised an eyebrow at me. “Really, Hotch. I’m fine. I just-” “Don’t like getting yelled at,” he finished for me, “I know.”

I gave him a look of confusion. “How’d ya know?” I asked, not really thinking that he’d answer, and not particularly needing an answer, either. “Your body language,” he started, “When he raised his voice, your breathing increased, and you took small steps back. When he didn’t relent, you stared him straight in the face, hoping he would. Though you didn’t directly show it, you wanted to cry, but you didn’t want him to think of you as weak,” he stated, like it was the most boring conversation in the world. I blinked a couple of times. “Do you?” I asked quietly, looking at the ground. “Do I what?” He asked, stepping closer to me. “Think I’m weak…” I said, my voice trailing off, and I chanced glancing up at him. “Of course not. Why would I? You prove yourself every day on this team, and not once have you let us down. I have no reason to think you’re weak. You cry when you’re mad. Some people do. It’s just a natural reflex. I know you can handle yourself, I just don’t like people talking to you like that.” His voice was low and soft, as if he was afraid talking too loudly would break me. I smiled up at him, softly. “Thanks, Hotch,” I said, putting my hand on his arm. “Of course,” he said, and gave me one of his rare small smiles, as he walked back to Rossi. I took in a deep breath.

Now, it was time to help save Reid and Emily.