look at his face after he says it cause no one laughs

Oikawa sighs for the third time as he stares down at his empty wallet in hopes that if he stares long enough, the money will magically appear and rescue him from the hell that is being an unemployed university student.

“C'mon, you piece of shit. Produce money.” He murmurs, shutting his eyes and opening them again. His fantasies are shot down as he’s faced with worn leather, an empty wallet and an empty stomach.

“You know you have to actually get a job to get money, right?” A voice laughs, smacking Oikawa in the back and causing him to choke and fall dramatically to the ground as he clutches his throat.

“Makki, he’s dying. Save him. Oh no.” Matsukawa says monotonously, his hands in his pocket, looking every bit of a jackass with his stupid leather jacket (they had gotten into an argument over it, actually. Oikawa  insisted it made him look like a jackass but Hanamaki had complimented it that one time 2 years ago and now Matsukawa wears it everyday).  

As soon as Oikawa clears his airways of who-knows-what, he flings himself at Matukawa, swearing something along the lines of you over-eyebrowed sack of shit.

After a few minutes of struggling, Oikawa is sitting on Matsukawa’s chest with his hands wrapped around his throat. He heaves out a sigh as Matsukawa continues to grin, not at all fazed that his best friend is trying to kill him

Oikawa clambers off of him and lays back on the grass, his stomach complaining about the neglect.

“Ask the hot professor if you can be his personal assistant.” Hanamaki says with a grin that Oikawa wants to rip off.

“Who?” Oikawa plays dumb, rubbing his hands through his unwashed hair. He didn’t have enough money for the water bill and they shut it off two days ago resulting in him shoving pine tree air fresheners down his pants as a preventative measure.

“The one with a nice ass,” Matsukawa  comments. “The one who’s crotch you anime-girl faceplanted into at the beginning of the semester.”

“You tripped me-”

“I tripped you an entire 10 feet away from where Iwaizumi was standing, the rest was all on you.”

Oikawa ignores that and blatantly lies, "I’m not gay-“

“Ha!” Hanamaki snorts and Oikawa is grinning too because he’s been nothing if not overwhelming gay.

“I was serious though, I heard he needs an assistant for things. Who knows, you’ll probably end up naked with him.” Matsukawa grins and the sentence makes no sense but Oikawa brushes it off because Matsukawa usually doesn’t make sense in general.

As the 2 boys head to their next class, Oikawa sighs again, cursing his life and questioning his choice in friends.

Oikawa stands up and catches up with the two who are deep in conversation. By the looks of it it’s a bad conversation.

"Me and Makki were discussing-” Matsukawa starts.

"No.” Oikawa nterrupts. Every time they ‘discuss’ things, Matsukawa and Hanamaki feed off one another’s bad decisions and somehow end up ruining some aspect of Oikawa’s life.

“Money’s involved~”

“I’m not a prostitute, Makki. Just because you offer me money doesn’t mean I’ll agree to whatever idiotic plan you have-”

“It’s thirty dollars.”

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Imagine making up with Carl after a fight...

Originally posted by daryl-dixon-is-life

“Damn it.” Carl groaned as he flopped onto your front porch, as you leaned against the back of the door, a smile formed on your face.

“You know I can keep this up forever [Y/n] Dixon, just cause you are mad at me, doesn’t mean I’m going to stop loving you.”

“I haven’t stopped loving you either, still I’m not letting you in.”

“All I did was say that I thought you should go and make me a sandwich.”

“Implying that I should go to the kitchen, which is sexist.” You laughed as you imagined a smile forming on his face, from the sound of it he was still laying on the porch, probably looking at the peeling paint.

“Now why would I ever think someone as badass as you should be in a damn kitchen all day, you would probably drive the others insane, or put an arrow through the first one who pissed you off.”

“Just cause I am a Dixon don’t mean I got a…”

“Oh you do. That’s one of the many things I love about you.”

“Well Carl if you agree to make both of us a sandwich I guess I can let you in, but just so you can tell me more about why you love me.” 

“Deal.” He said as you slowly turned and unlocked the bolt, revealing to you the scene of Carl just laying on your porch, his hat blocking his eyes.

“Carl, have I told you lately I love you.”

“No, but I’m sorry for desiring a sandwich and thinking my wonderful girlfriend would make me one.”

“Apology accepted, now get inside before people start to question my pa about the Grimes boy laying on his front porch.” You smiled as he quickly hopped up and came face to face with you, before kissing you quick.

Green Cat

Summary: "You slick son of a bitch.“ Adrien muttered in wonder.

"Dude, you’re going to drill holes onto Nath if you keep giving him that look.”

A/N: Hmmmm Adrien being jealous hmmmm

Cat son has no chill no matter how many times he tells himself to chill

Adrien first noticed it one day after school.

He was walking out of the locker room after a brief call from Mr. D'argencourt saying that he would come to practice slightly later than usual, where a family problem came up and he would come to school after that as soon as possible. Adrien had his mask in his arm when he saw Marinette walking out of the library, a smile on her face as she started to walk down the stairs, holding her books to her chest.

He felt the corner of lips twitched, and was about to greet her when Nino came out behind her, laughing loudly at something she said that caused the girl to roll her eyes at him, before slapping his shoulder playfully as her bespectacled friend walked down beside her.

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a fuckboy story

I was at a birthday party and me and my friends were playing never have i ever when the birthday girl’s other friends (pure garbage) decided to join us

So one of these fuckboys was like “never have i ever… Fucked!”

While a few people lowered one of their five fingers, I kept mine up, cause I’m still a virgin

That’s when the fuckboy turns to me laughing, winks at me and says: “come on bitch lower your finger haha”

And I was like, excuse me?
He kept staring at me laughing and saying i had to lower my finger, then he asked me if I was seriously still a virgin, I nodded, still sort of pissed, and he just looked at me in shock, with a grin on his face

After a few minutes, it was his turn again and he said: “never have i ever… Did foreplay haha”

Again, while a few people lowered their fingers, I held my five fingers up

So he started poking at me again “bitch come off it, we know you’re wild in bed, you have the face of a dirty little whore haha”

I was embarassed and I tried to think of a good comeback, but then I realized I still had my five fingers up, so I used them to slap the fuck outta his fuckboy face in front of everyone

After reading this chapter, it has been more than clear that Kaneki’s humanity will only return when Hide appears. Hide will force him to return to be “human”.

I think the scenario will be similar to the last chapter of Root A …he will tell him what he has done during these years, he’ll joke with how alone he has felt without him and he’ll make him laugh… Maybe Hide has that melancholy expression but tries to smile for his friend. They are facing each other, they were quiet …Kaneki avoiding the look of Hide, and Hide looking Kaneki pityingly. 

“There was no other option, uh?”, Hide says. 

“I’m… sorry… I’m not the one that I was before”,  mutters Kaneki.

“Ah?! What’s with that?”, he gets upset. “«I’m not the one that I was before», What is this? A dramatic novel?”

Kaneki smiles wryly, keeping his eyes on the floor.

“No matter who you are or what you are. Because I don’t see a ghoul or a investigator; nor I see Kaneki Ken or Sasaki Haise. I only see my friend”.

Kaneki covers his face and starts to cry. Hide then comes over and hugs him:

“It’s alright, man… don’t worry… You are at home”.