loo roll

Paper Hearts (Part 14)

Originally posted by tbhobi

Genre: Angst/fluff

♡ Pairing: Reader x Jungkook // Reader x Jimin

♡ Length: 5.1k

♡ Summary: It has been nearly a year since you started writing anonymous letters to Jungkook, giving him words of encouragement behind the thin mask of a paper. He never considered you as a possible suspect behind these letters, because you were nothing more than a best friend. And you couldn’t put all the blame on him either, after all, you were too afraid to confess in fear of tarnishing your precious friendship.

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Texting you while he’s drunk
You’re on your period
When you fall down the stairs
Everyday texts w/ Taeil

Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave
You’re scared/nervous around another member
They get jealous when you fangirl over got7′s comeback

Texting you while he’s drunk
You’re on your period
Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave
Hansol exposing both of your relationship to the group chat
Everyday texts w/ boyfriend!Hansol
Reassuring him that he’ll debut soon
You’re scared/nervous around another member
Confessing to you but you’re already dating someone
Hyung Line teasing Hansol for having a crush on you

Texting you when he’s drunk
Sending you pick up lines and you’re already dating
When you flirt with another member to make him jealous

You’re on your period
Brother!Johnny finds out you’re dating another member

When you fall down the stairs
Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave
Smutty/Daddy texts with Johnny
They get jealous when you fangirl over got7′s comeback
He wants you to call him Oppa
Long distance relationship with Johnny
Everyday texts with Johnny

Texting you while he’s drunk
When he starts missing you

Johnny exposing your and Taeyong’s relationship
Texting him when you’re drunk
You’re on your period
When you fall down the stairs

Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave
Cute domestic texts with Taeyong 
Smutty/suggestive texts w/ Taeyong, Jaehyun and Ten
You fangirl over Monsta X’s comeback
They get jealous when you fangirl over got7′s comeback
Brother!Taeyong Mimicking The Elephants in Chiang Mai
He wants you to call him Oppa

Texting you when he’s drunk
Everyday texts with Yuta
When he’s high-key missing you
You’re on your period
Brother!Yuta finds out you’re dating Jaehyun
When you fall down the stairs
Everyday texts with clingy Boyfriend!Yuta
Accidentally exposing his crush on you
Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave 
Admiring Yuta’s ass in the 127 group chat
Smutty texts w/ Yuta
Late night texts w/ Yuta
Best friend!Yuta finds out you’re dating Taeyong
Brother!Yuta when he finds out you and Ten are dating
They get jealous when you fangirl over got7′s comeback
He wants you to call him Oppa
Jealous when you give your attention to another member
An (Almost) ordinary relationship with Yuta

Texting you when he’s drunk
Cute domestic texts w/ Doyoung

Texting him when you’re drunk
Everyday texts w/ Doyoung
When you fall down the stairs
You’re on your period
His brother exposes Doyoung’s crush on you on a live broadcast
Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave
The 127 chat slandering you and Doyoung for being a little too loud

You fangirl over Monsta X’s comeback 
They get jealous when you fangirl over got7′s comeback
He wants you to call him Oppa
Cancelling a date with Doyoung because you have bad cramps

Texting you when he’s drunk
You’re On Your Period
Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave
Cute domestic texts w/ Kun
Missing you during a long distance relationship
He’s had a bad day and you try to cheer him up
Confessing to you but you’re already dating someone
Everyday texts w/ Kun
Poly!Relationship with Winwin and Kun

Texting you when he’s drunk
When he’s (sorta) motivating you to do revision
Everyday texts w/ Ten
Texting him when you’re drunk
Ten Birthday Texts
You’re on your period
Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave
Smutty/suggestive texts w/ Taeyong, Jaehyun and Ten
Waking you up late at night to tell you he loves you
You fangirl over Monsta X’s comeback
Brother!Yuta when he finds out you and Ten are dating
He wants you to call him Oppa

Ten, Taeyong and Yuta trying to get you both together
Everyday texts with Jaehyun
Texting you when he’s drunk
Organizing his party w/ the other members without him knowing 
Cute domestic texts w/ Jaehyun
Texting him when you’re drunk
You’re on your period
When you fall down the stairs
You can’t sleep
Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave
Smutty/suggestive texts w/ Taeyong, Jaehyun and Ten
You fangirl over Monsta X’s comeback
He’s angry because you get a lead role in a romance drama
Breaking up because your group is debuting
They get jealous when you fangirl over got7′s comeback
Twin!Jaehyun finding out you’re dating Johnny

Texting you while drunk
When you fall down the stairs
You’re on your period
Finding out he wasn’t your first bias/fave
Brother!WinWin finds out you’re dating RenJun
They get jealous when you fangirl over got7′s comeback
He’s feeling poorly and is being whiny about it
Poly!Relationship with Winwin and Kun

Everyday texts with Mark
When you fall down the stairs
127 Giving Mark dating advice 
When Haechan confesses but you’re dating Mark [1] [2]
You fangirl over Monsta X’s comeback
You’re scared/nervous around another member
They get jealous when you fangirl over got7′s comeback
Mark telling his boyfriend ‘I Love You’ in a cute way
Everyday texts with cute/shy Boyfriend!Mark

He has a crush on you (A Noona)
Little brother!Jeno finding out you and Taeyong are dating

When he has a crush on you but is high-key really awkward about it
When you fall down the stairs (127)
He has a crush on you and tries to tell you throug M.F.A.L lyrics
When Haechan confesses but you’re dating Mark [1] [2]
You’re scared/nervous around another member
They get jealous when you fangirl over got7′s comeback

Brother!WinWin finding out you’re dating RenJun
Screaming at him over text about his new selfies
You’re scared/nervous around another member

Dream flirting with you while you’re secretly dating Jaemin
Dream deciding to expose Jaemin’s crush on you
Jeno exposing Jaemin’s crush on you
He’s jealous when you’re hanging out with Jeno

When you confess but he rejects

Meme war with Jisung

Group Chats:

Roast Session With Doyoung, Yuta, Haechan and Johnny
Johnny Exposing Your And Taeyong’s Relationship
Dream Trying To Hit On You But You’re Dating Ten
When Jeno Has A Crush On You (A Noona)
Johnny Almost Exposing Your Relationship In The Group Chat
NCT 127 Giving Mark Dating Advice
Dream Flirting With You While You’re Secretly Dating Jaemin
Yuta Accidentally Exposing His Crush On You 
Jaehyun Exposing Yours And His Relationship When The Guys Flirt With You
Hansol Exposing Both Of Your Relationship To The Group Chat
The 127 Chat Slandering You and Doyoung For Being A Little Too Loud

Admiring Yuta’s Ass In The 127 Group Chat
Dream Deciding To Expose Jaemin’s Crush On You
Jeno Exposing Jaemin’s Crush On You + Jeno Being A Snek
Ten Is Stuck On The Toilet Without Loo Roll and Everyone Is Out
Hyung Line Teasing Hansol For Having A Crush On You
ANOTHER Roast Session/Meme War With Doyoung, Yuta, Haechan and Johnny


Yuta - Follow Your Heart:
[1] [2] [3]


Everyday Poly!Texts With WinKun 


Meme’s used in great texts
My neighbours, probably.
pls stop growing jeno

Gif Sets:

Favorite Ten And Lucas Moments In D.I.A.D


Theo x Reader

Requested By Anon

Warnings: language and phrasing?

“Theo it’s cold and raining.” You sighed as he woke you at an ungodly hour and insisted you bundle up and go out into the cold rain.

“Yeah well it’s not raining in the truck.” He grunted, unlocking it as he stopped you from getting in the passenger side. “I’m trusting you with something very precious and important.”

Keep reading

The Night Manager: Secrets of Le Carre revealed at TV Festival

The BFI Radio Times Festival hosted key members of The Night Manager’s cast and crew last month, with Oscar-winning director Susanne Bier, executive producer Simon Cornwell and cast members Alistair Petrie and Tom Hiddleston sharing backstage secrets on this magnificent edge-of-the-seat spy thriller.

There will be some paraphrasing – you try deciphering my notes a month later! And apologies to any of the speakers if I attribute a quote wrongly or misquote.

Radio 4’s Front Row presenter Samira Ahmed was on hand to chivvy the info out of them.

What made you want to do it?

AP: The scale – even though it was the BBC – the settings, the budget to make it happen. Thanks to Tom and Hugh’s involvement, AMC and others got on board. The budget worked without being gratuitous.

SB: I come from low budget film, so I’m used to expanding small into something worth looking at.

SC: The budget was bigger than many films, we were free to do stuff we wouldn’t normally do.

SB: The story is about being drawn into the world of lavishness. You can’t do that without it being rich. Crucial was Roper’s location. That would set the bar for everything else.

A lavish location was key for The Night Manager

TH: The crew make it look more expensive than it was. The interior of the Alps hotel was inside tents! It’s a testament to an impeccable crew.

SC: When we found the Majorca location – originally Greece in the script – we had to rewrite.

AP: The private jet was a cardboard loo roll.

SB: It was a private jet!

AP: There was a guy with a light pretending to be the shining sun. Secrets revealed!

(At this point, Susanne’s reactions made it unclear whether AP was making this up!)

We revisited the clip of Danny’s attempted abduction, closing in on Pine’s eye through the hole in the door. Remembering how the tenseness set in almost immediately, you could almost taste the IMAX audience relive the original moment. The panel discussed how that frantic scene came together.

SB: Whenever you direct a scene you have one single idea. We had this leisurely, relaxed scene completely turned over.

AP: Susanne’s method is to go straight into rehearsal, thrust straight onto set. The crew can get nervous when cameras aren’t turning and you’ve nothing in the can.  There are so many elements of the story to fit in but endless rehearsal means everyone knows where they should be. Being in the middle of it is a privilege.

The panel discuss the intricacies of a busy scene

SB: You have an idea, you collect material. You know this particular moment is going to be there. There needs to be real emotion. You don’t see the actors acting, you’re in the emotion. And child actors are just as ambitious as adults.

TH: The casting of Hugh Laurie was genius. His presence, his casting presented a conflict, so affable and likeable (in comparison with evil Roper) he (Roper) is charming, funny, loves his family but is responsible for awful things – all the stuff is paid for by arms.

SC: That scene was a Masterclass in acting and directing. A brilliant piece of construction. It’s in the book but came alive on screen.

AP: The nanny was the director’s daughter, Alice, just 19. I felt like a creepy old man but she put me at my ease: no, we’ll have a dance, no worries.

They moved onto the fire alarm test scene, where Pine breaks into Roper’s office looking for evidence.

SB: This shows why Tom is so brilliant. What he does, he thinks, “Who is Roper? Where would he put stuff?” Not many actors can do things just with their face like Tom.

TH: It’s my favourite scene in the book and a testament to Le Carre. You read it with a propulsive momentum. The internal compulsion within Pine is active even when he’s still. It’s classic suspense, a ticking clock time window. The props were chosen carefully: Churchillian. Boxing. Stalingrad. Roper’s fantasy of powerful statesmen yet rough enough for a boxing ring.

We took a moment to appreciate the glory of Tom Hollander in the restaurant scene where Corky loses it.

Corky tries to warn Roper about Pine

TH (jokingly): The manhandling was improvised. He didn’t ask permission. I’m scarred for life.

SC: John le Carre loved the whole experience on set. The scene is in the book but not so bold and exciting.

SB: Tom Hollander went way more extreme than we’d all anticipated.

TH: It was such a pivotal scene and so exciting. The moment of Corky’s demise and Pine’s elevation to the top rank. JLC was magnificent in that scene. Pine settles him quite quickly in the book but JLC refused to be settled – like any great actor, he forced me to achieve more.

SB: I had to direct him to accept the apologies! He was: “What about her? What about him? (being brought their correct food). Well, I think this is very shoddy.”

AP: We’re on the coffee and mints by now on the next table.

“I must apologise for my friend’s behaviour” “I think you bloody well should!”

Pine v Roper

TH: The whole character was an exploration of the malleability of identity. There is something broken and unique about Pine. All his grief curled up inside. It’s why he’s a night manager, he hides behind darkness. Burr identifies that Pine is able to slide between characters. He had to embrace the side of himself that is quite like Roper. They’re looking in a mirror divided by a moral red line.

AP: My dad was an RAF pilot who came across interesting people. One guy became a good family friend. Great company – but he was a legit arms dealer. There was a disconnect between the job he did and what it led to, and the human being. You start with the human being, before the ‘what do you do?’ They do normal things and you layer in everything else.

We’re reminded how Roper likes to show off his arsenal – and then Pine blowing it all skyward.

SB: You need the scale and the drama of the explosions but it was a metaphor of the shoot out between two men. Roper doesn’t know how powerful Pine is until then.

AP: Looks bloody good on IMAX!

TH: There could only be one attempt at the explosion, everything after that had to be shot very fast while we had the smoke and flames. Hugh is magnificent. He realises he may have lost and loses his cool.

Capturing lightning in a bottle

AP: Dr. House, put the gun down! Sometimes, when you’re pressed for time, magical things can happen. Tempers can get frayed. Then it crackles and Hugh grabs the gun, unscripted. An extraordinary thing captured under time pressure. We were blessed with catching lighting in a bottle moments.

SB: In a way, limitations can be advantageous. It forces you to be accurate and push the boundaries.

Twitter got a bit shirty over Pine having sex with the women he rescued after they were tortured – apparently, even Bond doesn’t do that.

SB: That’s not true – Jed is rescued by Olivia Colman. I don’t think they had sex.

TH: He’s in love with Sophie. She awakens his moral duty and he’s motivated partly by guilt.

Any scenes that took you to the brink?

SB: Every day! There’s always an element of not knowing what’ll happen, it’s part of the creative process.

TH: Fight scenes always look violent but have to be very safe. I love shooting action, it’s choreographic, like dance.

The will is there for Series 2!

How do you feel, watching it now?

SB: It was a heart in mouth process but now I can sit down and enjoy! It was so much fun to do – none of us anticipated the impact . We showed it at the Berlin Film Festival and everyone loved it. So rewarding.

AP: If you’re really lucky as an actor you get something that strikes a chord. I’m genuinely bonded to the people involved. You share something very special. A special little gang. You’ve no idea the emails I’ve been sending with ideas for Series 2.

SB: It’s a privilege. I’m also sending emails. JLC doesn’t respond – I’m joking – I’m really scared of saying anything!

TH: I’m really proud of the team effort. The commitment and detail of every department adds up to more than the sum of its parts. It’s like a 1000 piece jigsaw landed intact. I couldn’t possibly comment on my email correspondence.

Having raised the bar for TV drama, is there a green light for Series 2?

SC: We are working on a story for Series 2. There’s no book and no Le Carre adaptation without a book. We’d love to see it happen. There’s an unspoken contract with each other but we have to come up with something really great.

It’s the greatest export in British cinema! (Audience member)

AP: Aw, shucks!

We need to see more of the Petrie Dish

If you think Hiddleston a bit of a charmer (yes, yes, me too) it has to be noted I did leave the room with a bit of a crush on the very funny Alistair Petrie. You might say he’s now my … Petrie Dish. #sorrynotsorry


Fri 9 May 2014 4:00am
Experimental Animation for class. We chose a a piece of music out of four tracks and animated as we saw fit. The only rule was not to use a computer for the process of animating.

anonymous asked:

Do you know how I can make it look like I haven't been crying? My eyes get always so red and swollen and I really don't want people to notice or ask me why I've cried. Because sometimes I break down in the toilet and I am anxious to go out but I need to and then I panic.

Hi friend. I’m sorry to hear that you’re going through a tough time at the moment. But please remember it’s okay to cry! I can apprieciate not wanted anyone to know you’ve been crying though. I’m a very emotional person and sometimes a good cry can just help. But that doesn’t mean you want people asking questions!

Here’s a quick guide on how to made it look like you haven’t been crying:

  1. If you can feel yourself about to well up, get yourself to the bathroom immediately. Don’t fight back your tears - they’re going to happen anyway so you may as well be somewhere where you can cry in peace. Holding it in will just make your face go red and if you’re like me, you will end up making those weird gasping breathing sounds that you just can’t stop.
  2. Once you’re in the bathroom, let your tears fall. Don’t hold them back for the same reasons as above. You need to cry, so let it out. You’ll feel better for it. If needed, lock yourself in a cubicle for some privacy.
  3. Whilst you’re crying - and this is important - make sure you keep your breathing going. More often then not, when we cry we end up forgetting to breathe. Now your nose is going to be too stuffed up right now so just breathe evening through your mouth. This will also help with any redness that may appear.
  4. Once you’re done crying, take a few deep breaths. And then take a few more. You want to get your breathing under control and to get rid of any teary-voice that may be there still.
  5. Don’t forget to blow your nose. You’re going to be snotty. And that’s alright. But make sure you blow your nose until it’s nice and clear again.
  6. Now once the coast is clear, go out to the sink and get some paper towels to dry your eyes. No paper towels? Loo roll will do! If you are/were wearing make-up, you’re going to need to clean up a little. Important note: if wearing eye make-up, remember to blot under your eyes - don’t wipe. This will just smear your make-up more. If you’re not wearing make-up, just gently press the paper to your eyes. Make sure not to rub them or you will make your face red and it will make it more obvious that you’ve been crying.
  7. Now you’ll need to cool your face down. If you’re not wearing make-up, splash your face with some cold water. If you are wearing make-up, put your hands in the cold water and then dab your fingers under your eyes. It will help to take down any swelling. Splashing your wrists with cold water will help too!
  8. Take a few more deep breaths. You may still be a little red and blotchy but for the most part you’ll be looking fine. You will notice it a lot more than anyone else. Trust me, most people will be oblivious.
  9. If you have long hair, a good way to quickly freshen up a little more is to throw your head forward, ruffle your roots a little, and then flip your head back again. It’ll quickly refresh your hair like you’ve just brushed it.
  10. And finally, once you leave the bathroom and go back into the room with everyone, take another deep breath. If your nose is a little red still, pretend to sneeze or rub the end of your nose as you walk in as if you are about to sneeze and you’re trying to hold it back. It’ll put people off the scent (har-har I did a pun)

Don’t forget my friend, it’s okay to cry. But your friends and loved ones just want to make sure you’re okay. It can be frustrating having people question why you are crying, but they’re only asking because they care for you.

The Date

Part 1

The most exciting thing about Roger was his dust allergy.  

There were specks of dust floating around the pub Roger was waiting in; he could see them rolling languidly towards his face, then scatter whenever someone walked past his table. It was no mean feat to glare at a million tiny pieces of skin and hair over the rim of a pint glass, but he attempted it. To the woman behind the bar Roger looked shifty as fuck.

Roger had neither a difficult upbringing, nor a challenging adolescence, and it was this that had led to him being completely and utterly boring. His parents owned a semi on the outskirts of a town; they had two cars; two children; one dog and the skeletons of several fish in shallow graves in the garden. There was a family business that Roger had shown neither willing nor resistance to joining. Now, several years in, he had become a Supervisor, overseeing a small section in their factory (he wasn’t in charge of anyone, but his name badge was a different colour to when he started). There were printed certificates - framed in his parents’ bathroom - that announced their son’s completion of the factory’s internal training program. In their eyes, his A-levels were now entirely overshadowed by these home-grown qualifications. Success was, as they always said after the single complementary glass of wine at the factory Christmas meal, in their blood.

At twenty-three, Roger had left the family home for a flat mere walking distance from work. Before his viewing of the flat Roger had only seen beds that folded into the wall in old movies, but now he was the satisfied renter of a combined bedroom, living room, entrance hall and kitchen with an adjoining room just big enough for a toilet. To actually use the toilet, for whatever reason, he had to fold himself around the jutting loo roll holder and avoid the bare, low hanging light bulb. To open the kitchen bin he had to stand outside in the hallway. But the flat was his and it gave him the independence from his parents that he was vaguely aware he was supposed to crave.

The dust in the pub disappeared for a second as someone opened and closed the door. Roger looked up, the faintest flurry of something akin to nerves fluttering in the darkest recesses of his intestines, before returning to his drink. He had no idea who he was looking for.

Roger’s aunt, Anne, had set him up. She was in charge of human resources at the factory and felt this gave her an insight into relationships outside of the work environment too. Anne was a daunting woman who mediated disputes simply by being present, cowing the workers into apologising to each other. At weekends she hosted lavish dinner parties for her large group of friends. It was always a happy affair lubricated by free-flowing booze but marred somewhat by her aggressive hosting style. Guests guffawed and smacked their fists on any available surface until it trembled – anyone who didn’t wasn’t invited back. In contrast, when Roger expressed any kind of joy his lips didn’t open at all, they just stretched horizontally over his teeth (and the grimace never quite reached his eyes either). It was only because they shared a gene pool that he was ever allowed back to his aunt’s dinner table.

Anne classified time spent with her nephew as suffering, but approached it as capital towards her future sainthood. She had found him miserable company since birth - that closed-mouth smile on a baby had been chilling to witness. Years later she had watched disbelievingly as he fell face first off his bike, despite the stabilisers, and just didn’t bother to get back up again. Roger’s existence continued to reinforce her choice to have no children of her own.

She was, however, both unable to stay out of other people’s business and incapable of leaving a problem in her life unsolved. Anne had identified Roger as a problem, blamed it on his perpetual singledom, and sought to do something about it whether he liked it or not. Perhaps, she mused, it would take someone his own age to tear apart Roger’s beige chrysalis. Perhaps, just over the horizon, there was someone who could rip off his dad jeans.

Anne pinpointed a victim through one of her dinner parties - the son of new neighbours. There wasn’t much she could say about Roger and thankfully this had made him come across as mysterious. Before the neighbours had time to process what had happened she had pounced, organised a time and location, and forcefully ushered them from the house to report back to their unsuspecting offspring. She phoned Roger as they walked, stunned, down the driveway. It had always been hard for anyone to decipher excitement in Roger’s voice – one teacher had described him as having all the enthusiasm of a dead cat - and so she pretended that beneath his monotonous “Okay” were layers of effusive gratitude and delight.

Days later and Roger still felt none of those things as he sat waiting. An hour earlier he had been struck by the realisation that he should go to the date wearing something other than his factory overalls, having got into the habit of keeping them on well into the evening. Folding the bed against the wall (and collapsing the single camping stool in the apartment), he was able to open the wardrobe and assess his options. Several grey t-shirts stood out to him before he noticed the chequered shirt swept to one side of the rail. A gift from his aunt. It still had the Matalan label attached. On his birthday he’d experienced a strong aversion to it (too loud and garish) but half a decade later the red and black print seemed less offensive. He slipped it on and admired his reflection in the toaster. Roger was quietly taken aback by how the shirt swamped his frame, and stood so he didn’t hunch as much. The sleeves flapped as he moved his arms. He reached for his neck and undid a button - the shirt fell open. Roger nodded to himself. He liked it.

Part 2

Nathan looked across the pub. He could only see one person sitting alone, and unfortunately they fitted the very basic description he’d been given of Roger. He continued studying him for a few seconds, during which the man sneezed twice. To Nathan, Roger looked like the kind of man who slows his walk to stare nostalgically through the windows of a Games Workshop, or the sort of person who asks for a deodorant gift set for Christmas. Apart from the threat of his frightening neighbor there was absolutely nothing compelling Nathan to walk across the pub. He remembered Anne’s handshake.

“Are you Roger?” Nathan asked, the veil hiding his disgust fluttering wildly.

“Yeah, are you Na-“

“Is that a pint of Baileys?” Nathan was unable to stop himself. Unbelieving he looked up at Roger and noticed a thin layer of milky fluid lining his top lip, beading in the colourless hairs that nested there. He felt something rise in his throat.

“Yeah?” Roger replied slowly, followed by a silence that stretched painfully. He made as if to rise from his seat.

“Can I get you a drin-”

“No!” Nathan’s voice had jumped several decibels. “Thank you. I’ll- I’ll go and get something.” He turned away and almost leapt towards the bar. Standing between two locals he looked past the bottles of spirits and into the mirror behind them. He could see Roger was staring at his back. Not weirdly, or hungrily – just staring. There was a blatant curiousness in his gaze that conveyed that this was clearly a new experience for the man. Nathan watched him peer down at the table, sneeze, then absentmindedly use his thumb and forefinger to wipe his top lip. In the mirror, Nathan’s expression softened a little.

A minute later he carefully put his drink down in the corner of Roger’s vision, with the same deliberate movements someone would use to avoid startling a horse. Roger didn’t shake himself out any kind of reverie – he just looked up. Nathan slid opposite him in the booth.

“Good choice.” Roger stretched his lips over his teeth and nodded towards Nathan’s drink. “You can get that as part of the Wednesday meal deal.”

Nathan slumped and mouthed “what?” to himself. He took a breath.
“It’s nice to meet you, Roger. I just moved here so I don’t really know anybody yet.”

“That’s alright, I’m pretty much the same.”

“Oh, how long have you lived here?”

“All my life.”

Nathan had assumed from initial sighting that this was a pity-date but now he felt something alien slither into his chest. It floored him momentarily to realise he felt sorry for this strange man. He crossed his arms.

“What’s that?”

Nathan followed Roger’s gaze and looked down at the dark mark curling out from just under his t-shirt sleeve. “Well, it’s, uh..” There was no point lying. “Last year I went to get a tattoo and I only got a bit into it before I had to make them stop. It hurt way too much.”

Roger leaned across the table and prodded the rest of the sleeve up Nathan’s arm, uncovering the blunt end of the small curved mark finishing just as abruptly as the t-shirt sleeve. What had meant to be a grand tribal pattern proudly twisting around Nathan’s shoulder had turned out to be a short sickle shape floating on his bicep. The angle was unfortunate - he looked like a half-hearted communist.

He also looked bemused. There was a stranger touching his arm who had no concept of personal space.

“Okay.” said Nathan, gently pinching Roger’s finger and sending it back over to his side of the table. “Get to know me a bit before you go prodding me with anything.”

The unsubtly of the comment flapped its wings loudly and soared over Roger’s head. He continued unfazed.

“So where did you guys move from?”

Nathan named somewhere barely a half hour drive away. They’d lived there for the last few years until his parents had quit their jobs to retire early.

“I needed to get out of home so went travelling for a year. Honestly, it changed me. I can’t really describe how mind-opening it was. I only got back a couple of weeks ago, just in time to pack up my stuff and help move. Have you ever travelled?”

“Actually, yeah we went to Wa-“

“I think it really sets people apart, you know? Like, you need to get out of where you grew up and see somewhere different. There’s people back home who just never made the effort to get out.” Nathan took a sip of his Fosters. “I feel bad for those people but like, you’ve gotta have the motivation to do it. Some of them will just never manage it.

“Thailand was beautiful, you’ve got to go. I did it all alone, by the way. There wasn’t anybody else at home who really had the same drive to explore so I just went by myself. I’d always meet people in hostels – some of the places were absolutely crazy, like you have no idea – and we’d go out all the time. That was cool for a bit but, like, I wanted to get off the tourist circuit and see the real country and experience the proper culture. So I closed my eyes and pointed to somewhere randomly on the map and kinda just went there?”

Roger’s eyes had become glazed (more so than usual).

“I ended up in this tiny village in the mountains that you could only reach on foot…” Nathan seemed to feed off someone looking at him and relished the attention. He became louder with every new country being described until eventually his detailed account of the rest his trip came to an end and there was a breathy quietness in the booth again. Nathan tipped back the remaining dregs of his drink.

Roger had finished his own pint twenty minutes ago. “Do you want another one?” he asked. His date nodded and Roger hurried away, clearly enjoying the silence. Nathan watched him grip the bar, reeling slightly.

He hadn’t meant to talk so much about his travels but they were such an exciting memory that he couldn’t help but enthusiastically retell them. It was a joy and privilege to allow other people experience what he had, and anyway, it wasn’t like Roger was going to contribute much to the conversation by the looks of it. Or maybe he’s just nervous, he thought. Fine.

“Thanks. So, what do you do, Roger?” he inquired, sipping from his full glass.

Roger looked taken aback, as if he didn’t quite know what Nathan meant.

“Well, I guess I spend most of my time at work – my parents have their own business and I help out. We make cat food and do pretty well. Uh, we’re thinking of branching into cat litter too, possibly, but it’ll depend on how well we do this year.”

“That’s… that’s cool.” Nathan was hesitant. “But what about outside of work? What’s your thing?”

“Oh. Um, I like films. Action films. Stuff on Netflix.”

This can’t be him flirting, can it? Nathan whispered internally.

“My favourite film is probably Avatar. The director’s cut, though. It’s got something about it the other versions don’t. I can’t explain it.”

“Ah! I saw it when I was in Thai-“

But the question had stirred something in Roger and he cut across Nathan to elaborate on his love for the film. He was still talking in the same monotone voice but he wasn’t faltering with his words anymore – it was running freely. Perhaps it was the pint and a half of Bailey’s that had loosened his tongue or maybe it was simply because nobody ever asked Roger questions, but he was, Nathan dared to think, coming across as almost passionate for something, and it felt quite lovely to let him carry on. Nathan smiled at Roger across the booth.

Roger continued for several minutes until he was interrupted by his phone.

“It’s my aunt.” He said, looking up sheepishly. “Wondering how tonight is going.”

“And what are you going to say?”

Roger paused, sneezed, and seemed to become reflective. Nathan studied his expression, then looked down at Roger’s fingers, clasped around his drink. His fingernails were surprisingly neat, and his hand was curling around the glass in a firm grip that suggested a casual confidence that Roger had yet to exude otherwise. Nathan leaned forward in the booth, fractionally, without realising. For a second Nathan wished he was the pint glass.

He looked back up, his stomach jumping a little as he met Roger’s gaze, as if he’d been caught. Roger opened his mouth to speak and a loud, harsh ringing cut across the booth. It took Nathan a second to realise his date hadn’t issued a banshee-like screech and that it was the pub’s fire alarm. They both looked to the side and felt the collective groan from everyone around them, followed by the shouting of a managerial type coming around the bar. A crash came from behind the kitchen door and muffled swearing.

They glanced back at each other, Nathan disappointed and longing for the moment that had been ripped from them, then slid out of the booth. They joined the throng of people exiting the pub, most still holding their drinks, then lost each other in the crowd. Nathan felt a pang of worry, then stopped himself. What the fuck was happening? He tried to grab hold of and articulate his emotional response. How had this guy, a guy called Roger, Roger, managed to entrance him so effectively? Nathan’s eyes popped. Entranced. This is not happening, he argued. To me.

Bewildered, Nathan found himself outside on the road. He looked around and spotted Roger’s brown hair, now tinged with the orange streetlight, on the outside of a group of people peering back towards the pub. He walked over and softly touched Roger’s elbow. Roger turned around, his face half in shadow. He really was quite tall. His mouth stretched outwards in a smile at the sight of Nathan.

“Okay, so this, uh, took a different turn.” Nathan joked quietly, noticing up close the shape of Roger’s lips, and the delicateness of his eyelashes.

“Yeah.” It was so cold outside that they could see each other’s breath.

“So, what were you going to say to your aunt about me?”

Yet again, Roger paused, and the space between them contracted.

“It’s been really nice, Nathan.”

He turned away. His face was now completely in shadow with the light illuminating only the back of his head and long neck. One hand went to rest in his coat pocket, the other loosely held half a pint of Baileys at his side, the remnants of several ice cubes floating listlessly as he walked away, leaving Nathan silhouetted on the street outside of the pub.

Jon Aitken

(The video documenting the making of this story.)

19 Genius Ways To Upcycle Your Child’s Plastic Dinosaur Collection

Dinosaurs will forever be in fashion. Jurassic Park made them ultra cool back in the early 90s and today they’re just as awesome. Plus, they have a great many uses… 

Turn Them Into Drawer Handles

A little spray paint and a spot of DIY and you’ve got yourself one epic desk. [Photo: Apartment Therapy]

Add Them To Your Terrarium

Who said plants were boring? [Photo: Yellow Brick Home]

Fashion Them Into A Coat Rack

This is one upcycling idea guaranteed to jazz up your dingy hallway. [Photo: Etsy]

Make Them Magnets

Never has a fridge looked so terrifyingly brilliant. [Photo: Yellow Brick Home]

Go For A Garland

Who needs fabric bunting when you can make this gender neutral garland? [Photo: DIY Candy]

Stick Them To A Mirror

If you’re up for something a bit quirky, we love this fun idea. [Photo: Etsy]

Use Them As Planters

Let’s be honest, these look WAY more exciting than regular plant pots. [Photo: Off Beat Home]

Turn A Diplodocus Into A Loo Roll Holder

This is one way to jazz up your bathroom. [Photo: The Chic Site]

Give Them An Ornamental Status

A little lick of paint and you’ve got yourself some brilliant shelf liners. [Photo: Etsy]

DIY Yourself A Dinosaur Necklace

A brilliant gift idea, if we do say so ourselves. [Photo: Made From Pinterest]

Turn Them Into Cup Handles

Definitely a different look for your kitchen. [Photo: White Lights On Wednesday]

Cram Them Into A Transparent Box

That’s one way to decorate your lounge. [Photo: eBay]

Make Yourself Some Great Place Holders

Ideal for weddings. [Photo: Pinterest]

Use One As A Ringholder

We reckon this fella would look lovely on your dressing table. [Photo: Safari]

Make This Badass Toothbrush Holder

All you need to do is drill a hole through the middle of the toy. [Photo: Pinterest]

Get All Arty And Make This Wall Hanging

Whoever said dinosaurs can’t look artistic? [Photo: Etsy]

Make Yourself These Epic Napkin Rings

Makes napkins WAY more modern. [Photo: Hannah Kate Flora]

DIY Yourself A Dino Serving Dish

We could see this becoming the new cake stand. [Photo: Three Little Monkeys Studio]

Create Some Excellent Jar Toppers

Suddenly jam jars are everything. [Photo: Pinterest]

TalesFromRetail: At the convenience store you pay for convenience, also I don't make up the prices???

I work in a small 24/7 petrol station with a supermarket chain convenience store attached. Twice this woman has come in, yelled at me, bought nothing and then left.

Background: it’s 11:30pm. Enter FC, for Fat Complainer.

FC, sighing audibly and mumbling as she walks around store.

ME “hi, were you looking for something?”

FC “yes actually. I’m looking for loo roll. But it’s fucking stupid why would I pay 8$ for four rolls when I could just go to <competitor supermarket> and get twenty four rolls for 10$?”

ME “yeah”

The other incident was basically the same thing but about some juice brand. She comes in, yells at me, then leaves. Honestly I know we’re more expensive than the supermarket itself but that’s the price you pay for being able to buy arse towelettes in the middle of the night.

And why why why WHY WHYYYY do people shout at me about the prices? I am a drone. Not Mr BrandName fancy pants the third. I get paid minimum wage to stand here.

By: studentbodies

Star Wars: The Clone Wars High School AU

That crazy Anakin kid who covered the school in loo roll once and his whacky sister Ahsoka who keep leaving graffiti tags everywhere

Anakin and Head Girl Padme hiding their relationship because their parents would never allow it

That nerdy Head Boy kid Obi-Wan who keeps running around with Deputy Head Boy Commander Cody trying to stop Anakin and Ahsoka from keying dicks on Principal Palpatine’s car

Anakin and Ahsoka are sometimes joined by Anakin’s childhood buddy Captain Rex who likes blowing things up

All of them keep getting wound up with that sleazy Hondo kid who everyone thinks is a drug dealer, his goth biker girlfriend Aurra Sing and their feisty illegitimate kid Boba Fett

Plus Anakin, Ahsoka, Rex and Obi Wan keep having to run away from mean old man Count Dooku, his scary dog General Grievous and his mangy old cat Asajj Ventress who just want those darn kids off their lawn

The football team’s Quarterback Pre Vizsla bullying that cute geek girl Kryze Satine that Obi-Wan has a crush on and when they try and go tell Head Coach Darth Maul and Deputy Head Coach Savage Opress it turns out they’re just as bad as him

But it’s ok because Principal Palpatine fires them both because they risk exposing the fact that he’s trying to fiddle his expenses

answer 20 questions, then tag 20 followers

I was tagged by @themweirdsims (apologies for the long delay, I literally only just saw it).

name: Lucy
nickname: I have many nicknames, you ready? Luce, Loops, Lupy, Lucille, Lucifer, Lou, Loo roll (ikr?), Lulabelle, Quiet girl, Doesshespeak, Whatsername.
sign: Aquarius ♒
height: 5ft 2 - ish?
orientation: Landscape (am I funny yet?)
ethnicity: White
favorite fruit: Blackberries
favorite season: Autumn - I love the colours
favorite book: Pride & Prejudice - most ardently
favorite flowers: Snowdrop
favorite scent: Idk, flowery scents
average hours of sleep: 8ish
number of blankets i sleep with: 1 duvet
favorite fictional character(s): Killian Hook
ideal trip: Travelling all over Japan
when this blog was created: No idea, 2015?
birthmarks: Not that I know of
number of followers: 138 as of now
something embarrassing:  My life

I’m tagging: @simsums @ohthesefaces @lemonishsims @salsifychip @theartofsimplesims @flamedeyes @simlydarling @simmerinwinter @bottsbotts @midnitetech

If you want to? (I know, I only tagged 10 - it’s late and I wanna sleep).

Pixie Geldof, her friend Gillian and Nick Grimshaw stock up on groceries in Primrose Hill to prepare for the cold weather on February 5, 2012. Pixie and Gillian had a fun little twitter war with Pixie saying “Gillian just bought loads of loo roll so she can do a giant poo!” and Gillian replying “Pixie is just mad at me because I made her hold Andrex in front of paps.”.


me: give me funny things to say!

emma: we can’t, its too bland

louise: she’s epitome of bland

jon: is the she eurovision equivalent of beige?

louise: she looks like one of those people who you put on top of loo rolls in old people houses

emma: but nude-er

okay so for some reason my mum moved the spare loo roll behind the bathroom door which meant the bathroom door didnt open inwards as far as usual so when i went to the loo in the dark just now and found my attempts to open the door met with resistance i honest to god really thought there was a person hiding behind the door and for 2 seconds i was really fully prepared to knock someone out


I just want to get together all my pals and pool our (imaginary) money to buy a big plot of land up North and we can build a big fence around it and all build tiny homes and have a communal yurt (is that appropriative? the druids around here build them) where we can gather around the fire and build loads of extra houses for like refugees and other people in need of a safe place and we would have a little van for carpooling into a nearby city or town for people who work, and everyone puts what they can into the communal pot and we bulk buy like loo roll and basic food supplies and then people can obv buy their own things, and there would be like max 100 people maybe so you could feel safe letting your kids and animals roam around because you live in a badass vegan commune.

Who’s in?