longer than ever

when I was a child, I thought the best love was painless.

but you, my love, are not painless. you are rough and rigid with steely eyes, and a stormy disposition. you are hard and I am so soft, and sometimes I cannot breathe.

you, my love, are ice. so cold on the outside but freezing on the inside, so no one holds you for very long for fear of frostbite.

but I am the warmest thing you’ve ever felt. and I hold you longer than anyone else ever has.

—  S.D. // and you are starting to melt.
He looked at her. It had been a year. Her hair was longer than ever. Her eyes were filled with hope again. Her smile was so genuine. Her laughter was filled with life again. Her skin was basically radiating happiness. & she didn’t even spare him a glance. Oh how he thought he had destroyed her when he broke her heart. Oh how stupid of him to think he held that much power.
—  E.M.S. {She learned to love again}

keyleth asking if vex will hate her if she loves vax! vex very obviously lying through her teeth when she says no! keyleth and vex literally having a longer conversation about how keyleth still needs to figure things out than keyleth has had with vax pretty much ever! give me the gays critical role please!

@ anon: i DO NOT support animal cruelty of any sort, in fact i probably love animals more than your vegan ass does; i support normal vegetarians/vegans, not the ones (like you) who have superiority complex. also, as much as i would want to go vegan i can’t because of health issues.

Have I mentioned how much I love Voltaire lately. Like.. HOly shit. Did I ever talk about meeting him in person? We walked by him while he was having a smoke and talking to some people outside the club and my HEART STOPPED FOR TEN SECONDS. AND HE SAID GOOD EVENING TO US.

And then IN THE CLUB, I was so nervous and anxious and just waiting for him to come in for a chance to say hello and I blew it by panicking and not saying hello. Then I lost him in the lights and I felt like I was being stalked by a raptor - like, what if he bumped into me? What if he surprised me from behind and struck up a conversation like, ‘so, are you excited about the show tonight’ or something like that. But no, he was hanging out at the merch booth and being chill. And I was freaking out like holy shit I never thought I’d ever meet him and I had been listening to him since middle school.

So, my fellow introvert friend, who had never been to this club before, was like 'you should go talk to him! it’ll be okay!’ and I was like, 'okay, I’ll do it’ and she cheered me on from the sidelines while she caught pokemon and I went up to talk to him but the words kinda got stuck in my throat like it was full of peanut butter. So I decided to get a look at merch and prices so I could buy stuff and, damn, in hindsight I wish I thought of bringing cash. Because later, nearly all of those albums would be out of stock.

Anyway, I was hanging around at the table and decided to stand off to the side so that more extroverted people could talk to him and eventually it was just me and him for a few moments and he looks at me and says, “You know, you’re too polite. I feel like you want something but you’re too polite to say it” and we kinda chatted but I was really nervous and he was really kind and I told him it was my first Voltaire concert and he was like, “Oh, a Voltaire virgin!’ and he was really excited about this and said, "it’s okay, I’ll be gentle but we have to pop that Voltaire cherry’ and AGAINST ALL JUDGEMENT I said, "you can be as rough as you want to be, please.” and I don’t think he heard me but that doesn’t matter because I was really between panicking and being as giddy as a bat at a full moon at this point.

Like, he’s a funny kind of raunchy and it was a nice way to break the ice, it definitely helped me feel not so nervous and it didn’t help that I was absolutely flustered whenever he winked at me. SO ANYWAY. We kinda talked on and off before the show and he thanked me for coming by and that it meant a lot to him and we hugged, had a selfie, and he asked if he could kiss my cheeks and I said YES because how could I possibly say no and that was great. I was lovestruck and really could not shake that warm feeling off for the rest of the night. Like, it was like that European 'nice to see you, hello’ kind of cheek kiss. Not really any contact at all but I was fanboying so fucking hard at this point that the tiny details didn’t matter and I’m still grinning over it.

So, after the show (which was also great), I found out that the card reader that he said he might have after the show actually had no internet connection in the club. I went on a 'I’ve never been out by myself in the middle of DC, I have no idea where I am’ adventure across two streets to find an ATM. I came back and most of the albums I wanted were gone but I managed to get Hate Lives In A Small Town, Down To The Bottom Of The Sea, and Zombie Prostitute.

This was when things were dying down, people were starting to leave kind of since some folks seemed to come only for Voltaire and this cute goth girl who I didn’t really get a chance to talk to (we were both extroverts and fans of Voltaire and early gothic music though) and I didn’t get to ask where she came from or if she’d want to exchange facebooks and talk about music sometime. But I got her name and I know her face, I’ll know her if I see her there again - which I hope to do someday.

I also got a signed poster! And that was great. It was a Raised By Bats poster, which is the album I really wanted but didn’t get a chance to grab because poor planning. So, I danced some more. A lot of couples were dancing and I started missing my boyfriend. And Voltaire was on the dance floor, too! Which is weird because I guess I could -say- I danced with Voltaire but, more accurately, I danced -near- Voltaire because goths tend to just dance by themselves in close vicinity of each other according to my older goth friends. So, I danced in near vicinity of Voltaire for a while and the club was closing and everyone was getting ready to go for the night.

And that’s when I told Voltaire that this was also my first concert ever, which was absolutely true, and he looked surprised and was really flattered, thanked me for coming again and for picking his performance as my first concert and I just wanted to just thank him for existing and inspiring me but the words weren’t exactly coming out so I just thanked him for coming out and I kinda chatted with him some more as things were wrapping up and mentioned I was a writer and he was really supportive and that’s reignited my fire to write again - which I’ve been working on my book about cosmic horrors again and that’s been great.

So, that was my night with Voltaire. It was a fun night! I kinda wish I had a few drinks so that I wasn’t so nervous but I think for meeting my first celebrity, even though he is not super famous, it wasn’t a bad night.

I found out afterwards that he comes to the same club after / during every tour he does. So, I’ll get a chance to see him AGAIN. Even if chances are slim, if he recognized me somehow I’d probably just die on the spot from fanboying too hard. And my older goth friend, the day after when I actually did got drunk and started messaging her because who knows why, encouraged me to write a manuscript and GIVE IT to Voltaire and the thought kinda baffles me. Like, what if he liked it and wanted to read more? What if he became a fan of my work? It’s weird to think that there would be a possibility that someone I look up to would also like my writing and it’s exciting, 'cause I want to see if it would happen, and scary because he’s someone I look up to so much and the thought of him saying 'this is great’ is terrifying in the best way possible.

She also mentioned she has friends who go to this same club (Which I go with my friends on most Saturdays, when I don’t have work) who work for a publishing company and she wants me to bring along a manuscript next time I go to the club. And it’s just really exciting. I’ve had a really exciting two weeks just thinking about ALL OF THIS and I really need to work on my elevator pitch because, holy shit, I get nervous really quick when I try to imagine myself pitching the story to these friends of my friend. I mean, I’ve probably seen them before but I’m REALLY bad at names. So, maybe it won’t be so bad.

sandiegoreader.com
Durans' empty chair
Q: You cut Paper Gods without a dedicated guitar player in the group. Did you find that a struggle? Roger: “No, we thought that was exciting, to have an empty chair, if you like, that someone could fill for each song. We had John Frusciante, we had Nile...Dom Brown played on some of the record. When you’ve been playing together a long time, it’s good to have energies that come and go.”

I have such a hard time understanding this continuing attitude from the band. I mean, I KNOW Dom is not a member of the band. Dom does not EXPECT to be a member of the band. At this point in their lives they’re probably never going to make another person an official member of the band. But he has been part of their recording and touring organization for TEN YEARS. I know they have talking points, and they have to get the John Frusciante name out there, and the Nile Rodgers brand name is very important to them. But I feel like they can be so dismissive of Dom and his contributions and dedication and the fact that they have someone they’ve worked with for a solid ten years is something that deserves some credit and acknowledgement. (he’s been with them longer than Andy was EVER with the band, which John has actually acknowledged, but it felt more to me like a dis at Andy then an actual compliment towards Dom.)

</rant>

Time in London Part II—a Phrack RP

Phryne awakes the next morning momentarily not remembering where she is. When she turns and sees Jack asleep next to her, however, the previous night comes flooding back to her and she smiles softly. Quietly, she moves herself closer to him, a hand gently resting on his bare chest and drawing slow circles on it.

She had imagined for a long time what it would be like to be with Jack intimately, but what had transpired the previous night far surpassed her expectations, and even any previous experiences she had with other men. She didn’t believe in soulmates, she didn’t even believe in relationships, but last night had made her want to be with Jack for much longer than she had ever been with any man. Other than René, of course, but she knew Jack was absolutely nothing like René and never would be. He was far too quiet and gentle and concerned about her safety to ever be like René.

 idk how many people have noticed it but I’ve actually purposefully made Sans’ arms a little longer than normal ever since I began drawing him. How I designed it is so it’s of similar proportion to naturally quadruped animals ─ Adding it with his natural hook-shaped claws adds for easier grip onto the ground for further propelling, making Sans actually quite agile on all fours; being able to cover a lot of distance in a short amount of time. He moves similarly to a bear on all fours.

         Ofc, however, he’s lazy.
    While he can move well on all fours ─ Being raised in his family that all walk on two feet, he rarely sees the need to unless he feels extremely threatened or is preparing to use his larger size to protect something small (cOUGH like his kids), so often he just finds it more convenient to shuffle around (plus you can’t hold ketchup bottles when you’re using your hands. totally lame. looks like he’s walking on two feet).

 But yes this has been a very lowkey thing in all my art ─ I try to make it unnoticeable unless you REALLY try to look.

anonymous asked:

I do not have a teacher in the country I am in right now. What would be your best advice for self-taught meditation for something like me?

I self-taught myself longer than I’ve ever had a teacher. Half of that time is because I didn’t have a teacher in the area, the other half was by choice. A teacher is not always necessary, because you can learn on your own most of the basic steps and techniques. Only maybe down the line if you want to learn any “advanced” stuff is when a teacher might be needed. 

Right now, the Internet is your teacher. There was a time where I didn’t even have access to books, so Google became my nirvana and because of it, I know a lot of what I know now. Don’t get discouraged or think you aren’t capable of learning and practicing on your own. It’s definitely possible and doable.


Smile and be well!